Godiswithme: I'm very scared

[Mort81]

Np

[Godiswithme]

Goldiswithme,

 

welcome to Surviving Antidepressants.

 

I'm sorry that you had to experience an acute state of withdrawal.  I usually just hang out at the benzo-forum, but Shep asked me to have a look at your story.

 

Now that you have had a partial reinstatement and feeling better ( good catch, Shep), you may be able to make sense of the events that led to your acute state of withdrawal. 

 

You went off three drugs very quickly, the Lexapro, the Abilify, and the Xanax/Ativan.  When did your symptoms become most severe?  After the Lexapro/Ability cold turkey? or after the reduction in Xanax?

 

After you reinstated the Xanax, you got much better and was able to sleep.  That should give you breathing space to think.   Do you think you can live in withdrawal from Lexapro/Abilify until you heal and then tackle to Xanax?  or do you think you need to reinstate the Lexapro and/or Abilify?

 

Once your CNS is shocked, it takes a while before it calms down, so even with the reinstatement, it can take a couple of weeks for your nervous system to calm.  So until you have waited a few days to a couple of weeks, you might want to not make changes to your drug regiment.

 

Another point about your updose/reinstatement of Xanax is that although you are taking 0.25 mg Xanax four times a day, it is not exactly the same as taking 2 x 0.5 mg.  Although you don't get the decrease in Xanax in your blood between doses by taking Xanax four times a day you also don't get the peak concentration and your body might react to the decrease in peak concentration.  If you are able to hold for a while at the new dose ( 4 times 0.25 mg Xanax for a few weeks or months) your CNS will calm and become used to the new drug regiment.  You are likely to still feel withdrawal symptoms but they may be bearable.

 

So making only one drug change at at time and waiting to see what the results of that change is a good suggestion. 

 

When you say that your tongue is touching the top of your mouth, when did that symptom begin?  Could that be from the Abilify?

 

Hello Wellness, I am trying to set up my profile in the benzo only area right now.  Please, when you are able, respond to me? I could really use your assistance and your kind heart.  Thank you.

The tongue thing is not always present.  I don't know if Xanax helps that or not.  I guess it could be from the Abilify, I was only on the Abilify for 8 mos.  I had a mistake in my signature.  I am hoping its not that.  Shep told me that also could be linked to AD's which I was on for 2 years.

[Shep]

Hi, GIWM.

 

To set up a benzo thread, please click on this link to the Members-Only Benzo Forum.

 

Click on Start New Topic (located in the upper right section of the page).

 

This will allow you to post in the same manner that you're posting in your thread here.

 

 

[Godiswithme]

Does anyone feel agoraphobia in their own home? I am afraid to go upstairs sometimes. Or afraid to go into different rooms. This is bizarre. I have a family. Not functioning. Just in extreme terror.

[Godiswithme]

May I ask - by cold turkeying both escitalopram and Abilify, did I effect both seratonin and dopamine? I feel so badly. Don't want to be drama person. Honestly suffering.

[scallywag]

I've moved posts from the new topic in this forum (Introductions & Updates) you started to your introduction topic so that all your information, questions and answers are in one place.

 

The acts of starting, continuing to take and discontinuing (in any way) both escitalopram and aripiprazole (Abilify) affect neurotransmitter processes and cells. The duration of these effects is unpredictable, they are unlikely to be permanent. You may want to research the concept of neuroplasticity -- the brain's ability to rewire itself.

[Godiswithme]

Scallywag, I am confused as to why the benzo question was moved here? Will you please explain? Do I need to repost it using the link you provided? Thank you.

Sorry to be a pain.

[scallywag]

The posts were made in a new topic in the introduction forum, not the benzo forum. I've moved them from your intro (this topic) to the benzo forum at this link:

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/13558-godiswithme-xanax-taper-after-cold-turkey-of-lexapro-and-abilify/

[Godiswithme]

The posts were made in a new topic in the introduction forum, not the benzo forum. I've moved them from your intro (this topic) to the benzo forum at this link:

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/13558-godiswithme-xanax-taper-after-cold-turkey-of-lexapro-and-abilify/

What do I do to avoid making this mistake in the future? Thank you.

[Shep]

GIWM, it can definitely get confusing at times when it comes to using both the main forum and the benzo forum. But you're set up right now. 

 

You have two threads:

 

Intro Thread: Godiswithme: I'm very scared

 

Benzo Thread:  Godiswithme: Xanax taper after cold-turkey of Lexapro and Abilify

 

You might want to copy and paste the links into your signature. I have my Intro thread in my signature, and it makes it very easy for me to navigate my way back to it.

 

Many people find themselves using both threads. The main Intro thread is best for getting information on drugs other than benzos, as well as asking general information, information about supplements, etc. 

 

The benzo thread is best for information solely about your benzo taper. 

 

You may also want to "follow" your threads. Click on the Follow button in the upper right corner of this thread, as well as your benzo thread. 

 

But for now, you're set up and will be getting replies on your benzo thread, too.

[Godiswithme]

So many thanks!!

[Happy2Heal]

Does anyone feel agoraphobia in their own home? I am afraid to go upstairs sometimes. Or afraid to go into different rooms. This is bizarre. I have a family. Not functioning. Just in extreme terror.

 

yes I had this too, I was afraid to turn around and look at the windows in my living room for example

I hated being alone

 

please try this: http://www.getselfhelp.co.uk/music/FirstAidPanicF.mp3

 

 

when you have gotten yourself a bit calmer, try to write down the things that you are thinking, no matter how odd they may seem

 

don't censor yourself, even if you are embarrassed by your thoughts, just get them out of your head and onto paper, OR if you have someone understanding that you can call or talk to, tell them what you are thinking while you are feeling this way

[Godiswithme]

Thank you Catnapt.

[Happy2Heal]

Thank you Catnapt.

 

you're welcome

 

I replied to your questions in my thread, If you didn't see them, you can find them here: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/10851-catnapt-hi-im-new-hope-im-doing-this-right/page-9

 

I hope they help at least a little bit

[Godiswithme]

Godiswithme,

 

I am 2 1/2 years into a cold turkey wd from Zoloft and zyprexa. I feel better than I did on the meds, but am still not doing terribly well. I still suffer from insomnia and fatigue, but it is possible to keep going. I have even had to start drinking again after 15 years of sobriety as a way of getting to sleep at night. A small reinstatement may be a decent plan, but I am not sure. I didn't really know about reinstatement when I stopped so it was different for me, but there are plenty of people who as far as 2 years after quitting the drugs have gone back on them and have been able to gain their lives back. The drugs are lousy, but sometimes are brains grow accustomed to them and pulling them away too quickly can be a shock. I still think about trying something to help with my sleep, but haven't had much luck when I tried ambien, remeron, or trazadone. Listen to your soul and figure out what is best for you. God is proud of you for getting this far and is willing to understand whatever choice you choose to make regarding the drugs.

 

PoetJester

How long were you on Zoloft? Thank you for responding to me.

[Godiswithme]

Whether you reinstate or not it's possible to recover from this. I know it's scary right now but with a little help and guidance from us and some time and stabilization you can get through this.

 

Please read the links and fill in your drug history signature with your drugs , dates, doses , discontinuations and any reinstatements over the last 12 - 18 months.

Please put your withdrawal history in your signature

 

This is your thread to ask questions , keep track of progress and stay in touch with the SA community. Have a read of the links and come back with any questions you may have.

Ali

AliG. Because I have some pressure in my chin and tongue at times, Shep told me it probably would not be advisable to reinstate.

You really think it's possible to recover from what I did? To become me again? I honestly am a vegetable and that is with some Xanax.

I read all of the reinstatement links. I am still confused. I cold turkeyed at 30 mg. it has been almost 3 mos. I wouldn't consider reinstating Abilify. Maybe the escitalopram. May I ask what an example of an adverse effect would be? What is the worst adverse effect?

I can't do anything. I might need to chance it.

[Godiswithme]

Hello, my husband wants me to go to a new psychiatrist. He is insisting we get help because he can't stand seeing me like this. I have told him about everything on here. He said he just can't sit here and watch me deteriorate. Please can someone help?

[Mort81]

It's a crazy thing to learn that 90% of psychiatrists are hurting people and have no idea these drugs can this much harm. So unless you find a psychiatrist educated in this matter you will be disappointed and probably told that your symptoms are in your head or a new illness is manifesting and need new drugs. If you don't see a doctor in your area from our database it's gonna be tough. I got lucky and found a Pdoc in my area. His advice stay the hell away from drugs and this will take time. He also told me what we know here, that I tapered way too fast and should have reinstated earlier for relief. He then called my GP and told her to stop prescribing me more poison to treat WD symptoms. In contrast before I found this doctor I saw 14 doctors total and was tested for every life threatening illness on the planet. When they found nothing I was told it was just my anxiety by multiple doctors when they found nothing . Obviously I knew it wasn't anxiety so at that point I started to realize how broken the system is. Let me know your general area and maybe I can help you find someone who won't harm you further.

[Mort81]

The unfortunate truth is the only help you can get is to reinstate the biggest culprit. The lexapro. I also reinstated the Benzo but it didn't do anything for me. Mainly because I was on such a low dose in comparison to the lexapro, so it didn't affect me one way or another. The lexapro 30mg is a big dose so it doesn't Suprise me that your reinstatement of xanax isn't providing relief. That's my opinion because I've lived it.

[Godiswithme]

Mort81. I read your thread. You haven't posted since July? How are you? Thank you for responding. I don't know where to turn. I live in PA. Where do you live? I checked database. Only 1 nowhere near me.

[Mort81]

Hey I don't post often. I'm not too good yet. But I'm going in the right direction. I found this guy in PA . Don't know how good he is. I would email him first and see if he "gets Withdrawal syndrome " I found him on the madinamerica.com data base. Its one of the best websites we follow on this website. So hopefully this guy knows his stuff and can support you.Some doctors may be very aware that these drugs cause more harm than good but they still might not know how to reinstate and taper properly. Although those doctors exist they are hard to find. It's an awful place to be. I know how you feel. I remember in the early days trying to figure out what's wrong. Its a surreal experience.

 

https://psychiatrists.psychologytoday.com/rms/name/edward_chastka_md_wyomissing_pennsylvania_140963

[Mort81]

I'm not too thrilled about his short introduction but madinamerica is a wonderful website. So if he reads it regularly than he should be up to speed. Just send him an email if hes not too far and than report back what he said.

[Mort81]

Okay I sent you the wrong Link. His bio is actually pretty good. Here it is. https://www.madinamerica.com/service-directory/30898/edward-chastka/

[Godiswithme]

That is so kind of you. I will pm you? Is that ok? Thank you.

I wish you were feeling better.

[Mort81]

Sure np. I don't have my PM notifications set up so I check them through the site. But I'll check them out now. And thanks ill feel better soon

[yyeehhaaww]

Mort, can you help with dr. in dallas?

[Altostrata]

 

IF, this is accurate,

 

you were on xanax 1.5 mg for many years (5???).

lexapro for 2 years

abilify for 9 months in 2016

while on those 2 you reduced xanax to 1mg

 

At this point, YOU WERE STABLE, correct?

 

THEN

 

On 9/4/16, you c/t Abilify AND Lexapro at the same time AND increased xanax to 1.5 for a month

then started the ativan 1 mg for 2 weeks and 2 days but stopped that on Nov. 4th AND basically weaned xanax down to .25 during the same 2 weeks so almost basically a c/t of xanax

 

Now you are taking a total of 1mg of xanax per day and in high anxiety, CORRECT?

Yes, except I was stable before going on the AD and Abilify. I was depressed about situational issues. I don't know why I took them. I had no idea this could happen.

 

 

Good summation, yyeee, thanks. GIWM, I think we've discussed this before, it looks like a lot of drug changes have affected your nervous system. My guess is that working with the benzo is your best bet.

 

This is a peer support site, none of us can foretell the future and tell you exactly what will fix you. You will need to work with this uncertainty, or find a doctor who will make decisions for you. If we knew of such a doctor, we would tell you. If you find such a doctor, please let us know.

 

Thank you. But I mean, it seems all the advice that could be given to me has been given?

I either reinstate or don't. My call. Honestly, when you look at what I've done, do you think I can heal some from this intense anxiety? Or is it more about learning to live with it and adopting coping skills. I had coping skills. I was never this anxiety ridden. I know I took Xanax, but it I never really felt anything from it. Just looking for a few opinions.

I hope Alto will answer this. I do not want to be a glass half empty person. I just want to be prepared.

 

Exactly. You need to learn coping skills and manage your symptoms for a while. The nervous system tends to settle down if you give it stability and don't offend it with drug adverse reactions. If you can tolerate Xanax or another benzo, it might help you get over this rough patch.

 

Hello, my husband wants me to go to a new psychiatrist. He is insisting we get help because he can't stand seeing me like this. I have told him about everything on here. He said he just can't sit here and watch me deteriorate. Please can someone help?

 

Very slim chance that you'll find a psychiatrist who even knows what benzo or antidepressant withdrawal is, and even less chance this person will know what to do about it. If you find such a person, please let us know.

 

You might allay your husband's worry by adopting an attitude of learning to manage your symptoms yourself. He might even help you with this. You can't just take your nervous system to a specialist and have it fixed, like car repair.

 

Okay I sent you the wrong Link. His bio is actually pretty good. Here it is. https://www.madinamerica.com/service-directory/30898/edward-chastka/

 

Thanks, Mort. As you find these people, please add them to http://tinyurl.com/7cp8l8v

 

GIWM, exactly how does this tongue symptom occur and how often does it occur?

[Mort81]

Okay alto just finished doing that.

 

Yeehaw this is the closest guy I found to u. In Austin TX. http://www.wildestcolts.com

[Mort81]

He has a whole section on his website dedicated to psychiatric oppression. So this guy could be really good.

[Godiswithme]

 

 

IF, this is accurate,

 

you were on xanax 1.5 mg for many years (5???).

lexapro for 2 years

abilify for 9 months in 2016

while on those 2 you reduced xanax to 1mg

 

At this point, YOU WERE STABLE, correct?

 

THEN

 

On 9/4/16, you c/t Abilify AND Lexapro at the same time AND increased xanax to 1.5 for a month

then started the ativan 1 mg for 2 weeks and 2 days but stopped that on Nov. 4th AND basically weaned xanax down to .25 during the same 2 weeks so almost basically a c/t of xanax

 

Now you are taking a total of 1mg of xanax per day and in high anxiety, CORRECT?

Yes, except I was stable before going on the AD and Abilify. I was depressed about situational issues. I don't know why I took them. I had no idea this could happen.

Good summation, yyeee, thanks. GIWM, I think we've discussed this before, it looks like a lot of drug changes have affected your nervous system. My guess is that working with the benzo is your best bet.

 

This is a peer support site, none of us can foretell the future and tell you exactly what will fix you. You will need to work with this uncertainty, or find a doctor who will make decisions for you. If we knew of such a doctor, we would tell you. If you find such a doctor, please let us know.

Thank you. But I mean, it seems all the advice that could be given to me has been given?

I either reinstate or don't. My call. Honestly, when you look at what I've done, do you think I can heal some from this intense anxiety? Or is it more about learning to live with it and adopting coping skills. I had coping skills. I was never this anxiety ridden. I know I took Xanax, but it I never really felt anything from it. Just looking for a few opinions.

I hope Alto will answer this. I do not want to be a glass half empty person. I just want to be prepared.

Exactly. You need to learn coping skills and manage your symptoms for a while. The nervous system tends to settle down if you give it stability and don't offend it with drug adverse reactions. If you can tolerate Xanax or another benzo, it might help you get over this rough patch.

Hello, my husband wants me to go to a new psychiatrist. He is insisting we get help because he can't stand seeing me like this. I have told him about everything on here. He said he just can't sit here and watch me deteriorate. Please can someone help?

Very slim chance that you'll find a psychiatrist who even knows what benzo or antidepressant withdrawal is, and even less chance this person will know what to do about it. If you find such a person, please let us know.

 

You might allay your husband's worry by adopting an attitude of learning to manage your symptoms yourself. He might even help you with this. You can't just take your nervous system to a specialist and have it fixed, like car repair.

Okay I sent you the wrong Link. His bio is actually pretty good. Here it is. https://www.madinamerica.com/service-directory/30898/edward-chastka/

Thanks, Mort. As you find these people, please add them to http://tinyurl.com/7cp8l8v

 

GIWM, exactly how does this tongue symptom occur and how often does it occur?

I called the doctor Mort suggested. Does not believe in withdrawal symptoms at 90 days. I guess he should be removed.

I notice some pressure in my chin area and my tongue seems to push upwards. I notice it every few days, but don't know if Xanax is masking it.

So, I guess your opinion of reinstating 1 mg of escitalopram would be a bad move?

Thank you very much.

[Mort81]

Wow sorry. Can't believe Hes on that website than.. Ya remove him.

[Godiswithme]

He has a whole section on his website dedicated to psychiatric oppression. So this guy could be really good.

Mort, unfortunately, he told me I could not be having withdrawal at this point, but I so appreciate your effort.

[Mort81]

That's awful such a shame. No problem

[Mort81]

It's really scary how alone we are in this. Tough for me to believe sometimes. He obviously reads madinamerica.com which is Robert Whittakers website. Whittaker wrote the best book in the field called anatomy of an Epidemic.

[yyeehhaaww]

frankly, I'm sure none of us are surprised.  Exactly what has happened to me by at least 3 docs == 2 pdocs... no one believes me or denial is easier for them to deal with on their consciences.

[Mort81]

Ya I am only surprised because he's affiliated with madinamerica.com. They post articles about our condition on a weekly basis. So it's not a random Doc. But whatever! what can we do. I feel like places like madinamerica.com and rxisk.org need to be more resourcefull and responsible to compile a list of Doctors to help. Sure they spread the word about the dangers of drugs but they don't provide anybody or anywhere to help. I think more time and effort needs to go into this.