☼ pinkfairy: rapid taper of Paxil

[pinkfairy]

I take 4mg of diazepam a day,but spread out....

it was 2mg morning 

1mg afternoon 

1mg nighttime 

 

the average weight of 8 pills is .175 

so that reduction was taken off the morning pill & it weighs .164 on the scales,so I just take that...

 

Xx

[Kostas]

10 minutes ago, pinkfairy said:

I take 4mg of diazepam a day,but spread out....

it was 2mg morning 

1mg afternoon 

1mg nighttime 

 

the average weight of 8 pills is .175 

so that reduction was taken off the morning pill & it weighs .164 on the scales,so I just take that...

 

Xx

So, 

That looks OK then. 

If you have made a reduction of 0.06 mg from your morning pill,(whatever is the final weight for the rest of it) and you take what is left of it in the morning, then should be alright! 

Just follow the advice here, be patient try to distruct  finding out new interests and will be ok in the end. 

Have a good night 

Kostas 

[pinkfairy]

That’s the thing I don’t know what have taken off...It’s why am asking for some one to check it out & see if it is only 1.5%...because this as packed a seriously powerful punch...

 

Last time I crashed I went like this,it’s haponing again.I was doing well & thought 1.5% is not nothing compared to others dropping at 10% 

 

i was so so wrong.I need to go back up & I was just wondering if it would be ok to do so?

 

I was stable,so I thought I was ready.Massive mistake...

 

How do we know when we are ready if it does this each time.

 

Thank you I have found quite a few while going through this!I didn’t even know I could paint or draw until WD,it’s saved my sanity many of nights.But when it gets unbearable all I do is just reassure my self over & over I am ok & breathe...I can’t even listen to any meditation or watch tv everything is blinding me.Its that acid feeling on my brain & body & sweating so bad but I am ice cold...It’s coming up to day 4 with no sleep.

 

Thank you for your reply 

xxx

[pinkfairy]

Any body please can you please help me to sort out where I am at & what percent I have just cut please?or if I need to go back up.

 

xx

[Shep]

18 hours ago, pinkfairy said:

Its coming up to day 8 & I just would like to know if I can go back up?

 

Yes, you can go back up if you are not doing well. Benzo updoses work best within a range of 2 - 4 weeks of a change, so you are well within that range. 

 

 

[pinkfairy]

13 minutes ago, Shep said:

 

Yes, you can go back up if you are not doing well. Benzo updoses work best within a range of 2 - 4 weeks of a change, so you are well within that range. 

 

 

Thank you for getting back to me...It’s more physical than mental this time around.

 

Shep do you know if that was a 1.5% cut?please. 

 

I am thinking of going back up,just so I know I am at 4mg again.Now I don’t know where I am at.

Thanks 

pink 

[Shep]

1.5% off of 4 mg is 3.94 mg. 

 

 

18 hours ago, pinkfairy said:

I asked a dear dear friend to help with the figures.I cut on the 5th of November...I don’t know where am at or what cut have done.

 

Pink, please work with your friend on this. Since you have someone on the ground to help, that is much easier. 

[pinkfairy]

2 minutes ago, Shep said:

1.5% off of 4 mg is 3.94 mg. 

 

 

 

Pink, please work with your friend on this. Since you have someone on the ground to help, that is much easier. 

  I can’t shep as there not very well there self.There going through this as well.Thats why have come back on here..too see if I can get the help,so I know I am doing it correctly..an safely.

 

If I go back up an stay at 4mg 

would I be able to get the help to taper next year?

[Kostas]

I cannot help you with your calculations, because I don't have the right data. 

 

If you are taking 4 mg of diazepam, and you want to reduce it by 1.5%,then you have to take 3.94 mg. 

 

First We have to know the weight of the pills you take for the 4 mg diazepam.

 

Then you have to multiply this weight by 0.015.

 

Finaly  you have to substruct this number, from the first total pills weight number. 

 

This result, will give us the weight of the pills you should take for a 1.5% reduction. 

 

But any way, I don't see how one will be able to measure in a weight scale such minute reductions! 

[pinkfairy]

29 minutes ago, Kostas said:

I cannot help you with your calculations, because I don't have the right data. 

 

If you are taking 4 mg of diazepam, and you want to reduce it by 1.5%,then you have to take 3.94 mg. 

 

First We have to know the weight of the pills you take for the 4 mg diazepam.

 

Then you have to multiply this weight by 0.015.

 

Finaly  you have to substruct this number, from the first total pills weight number. 

 

This result, will give us the weight of the pills you should take for a 1.5% reduction. 

 

But any way, I don't see how one will be able to measure in a weight scale such minute reductions! 

Thank you very much for trying to help me 

 

is it best to weigh 10 pills out?an then get the average weight off those 

 

4mg is in divided doses 

I just split the 2mg pill in half to get my afternoon dose & night time dose...so this pill weights won’t be the same as there split but not equal..I do know the pills fluctuate in weight.

 

i have to do tiny cuts as I am so kindled,with 2 CTs under my belt as well.Others on here reduce so very little.

 

Thank you again for trying to help.I just need to know if I am doing anything wrong.

 

Many thanks pink 

 

[powerback]

How's things at the moment pink ,you were saying you had more physical than mental problems ,are you back to the dose before you cut .

Thinking of you .🙏

[powerback]

You ok pink ,I know stupid question hey .

Are you in regular contact with a help team/DR .

Keep digging deep ,your worth it .

[pinkfairy]

On 11/21/2018 at 11:05 AM, powerback said:

How's things at the moment pink ,you were saying you had more physical than mental problems ,are you back to the dose before you cut .

Thinking of you .🙏

Hi p.b hope your holding on my friend 🙏🏻 

 

Yea,have gone back up.day 4 of the full 4mg.

 

my sleep as gone again,down too 3 hours.

 

what have noticed is I cannot get below 4mg,so I am thinking the 4mg is kind of like the glue what’s holding myself together. I tried & it didn’t work out.So back we up we go....

 

really really strugjling I have got caught in a spiral.I had climbed out of the rabbit hole.Now I have gone back in it...I see a therapist but I have been intouch with the mental health team,as I said I was struggling again.Totally useless.

I am intouch with baylissa quite abit 💕 (love her) But I have gone into utter survival mode again.All that had gone.Feeling devastated.I had made so much progress now back at square one...

 

under huge amours of pressure back at home.Feeling frightened an very scared at this tight corner I am in. Nobody to blame but my self for trying to taper.

 

i just want my son home pb the longer this goes on the more he his growing apart from me.i am desperate to get off to get him home.. devastating.also getting sicker & weaker!my son wants too come home But too disabled too..I am on dangerous ground I can feel it..My friend as been calling me to check as she’s worried,as she’s seen a huge declone.But the spiral as a hold,am really tired emotionally..

 

trying with all i have to climb back out.

 

But totally alone frightened out of my mind to be honest.I just pray I can get through this..

 

thank you for your care 

xxxx

[grandmaD]

HI Pink, I'm sorry I have not been around for a long time now, dealing with my own w/d issues, plus a son who attempted suicide again for the 3rd time recently on his birthday and now a gravely ill husband.  It is so tragic what so many of us have to endure, and we can only do our best and leave the rest!  I really feel compassion for everyone here, it just seems so unbearable.

 

Powerback if you are reading his, I really admire you and I am so sorry I don't have time to read your thread, but from what little I have read, you appear to be a lot like my son - he has been diagnosed with just about everything in the book, but the only one I will believe is called borderline personality disorder. 

 

I am very proud of both you and Pink for the tremendous effort you are putting into trying to get free of these rotten drugs.  I firmly believe my son has become hostage to them, but he doesn't realise it and I think this causes many of his issues along with stopping them from time to time because he "can't afford them", etc.

 

I can only take one day at a time, mostly just 5 mins at a time actually and I think that's the best we can do and not give up hope or give in to discouragement (my biggest killer!)

 

Oh, I got lost there - the reason I came on was for you Pink, because I kept seeing posts about weight and tapering, etc but was just not well enough to respond.  Eventually I did reply on my phone as I don't get on the computer anymore very much.  However my message/reply never got to you but went to Alto instead.

 

What I suggested was that you find a compound chemist to make up your tablets for you and that might save you a lot of headaches!

 

I always do my taper based on the weight of the tablet I previously took.  To go by the weight is more accurate I believe.  I'm not sure why you weight 8 tablets and how you work it out from there -  as I just weight the tablet I am taking and go from there.  1.5% of .1750 I worked out to be .1600. 

 

After the updose- have you seen any improvement?

[pinkfairy]

29 minutes ago, grandmaD said:

HI Pink, I'm sorry I have not been around for a long time now, dealing with my own w/d issues, plus a son who attempted suicide again for the 3rd time recently on his birthday and now a gravely ill husband.  It is so tragic what so many of us have to endure, and we can only do our best and leave the rest!  I really feel compassion for everyone here, it just seems so unbearable.

 

Powerback if you are reading his, I really admire you and I am so sorry I don't have time to read your thread, but from what little I have read, you appear to be a lot like my son - he has been diagnosed with just about everything in the book, but the only one I will believe is called borderline personality disorder. 

 

I am very proud of both you and Pink for the tremendous effort you are putting into trying to get free of these rotten drugs.  I firmly believe my son has become hostage to them, but he doesn't realise it and I think this causes many of his issues along with stopping them from time to time because he "can't afford them", etc.

 

I can only take one day at a time, mostly just 5 mins at a time actually and I think that's the best we can do and not give up hope or give in to discouragement (my biggest killer!)

 

Oh, I got lost there - the reason I came on was for you Pink, because I kept seeing posts about weight and tapering, etc but was just not well enough to respond.  Eventually I did reply on my phone as I don't get on the computer anymore very much.  However my message/reply never got to you but went to Alto instead.

 

What I suggested was that you find a compound chemist to make up your tablets for you and that might save you a lot of headaches!

 

I always do my taper based on the weight of the tablet I previously took.  To go by the weight is more accurate I believe.  I'm not sure why you weight 8 tablets and how you work it out from there -  as I just weight the tablet I am taking and go from there.  1.5% of .1750 I worked out to be .1600. 

 

After the updose- have you seen any improvement?

Oh hello grandmaD 

thank you for stopping by,an taking the time to write when your struggling your self...

 

i am so truly sorry to hear of your son.I cannot imagine as a parent what you must be going through.

its bad enough me just been away from my child.

 

my thoughts are with you.I pray you can get the help he needs.Your & amazing lady for what your having to endure while in this hell.

 

I am leaving tapering alone.For the seeable future 

 

The up dose as not worked.

in total acute symptoms again.

 

Am worn out with everything & trying to sort shopping out & every day tasks!Worried about my son 

 

its all goning horribly wrong!

 

you look after you & just keep taking it 5 minutes by 5 minutes 

it’s all we can do.

 

but it’s so lovely to hear from you.I wish there was a big beautiful retreat we could all go to ♥️

So we all weren’t alone in this hell.xxxxxx

[powerback]

3 hours ago, pinkfairy said:

Hi p.b hope your holding on my friend 🙏🏻 

 

Yea,have gone back up.day 4 of the full 4mg.

 

my sleep as gone again,down too 3 hours.

 

what have noticed is I cannot get below 4mg,so I am thinking the 4mg is kind of like the glue what’s holding myself together. I tried & it didn’t work out.So back we up we go....

 

really really strugjling I have got caught in a spiral.I had climbed out of the rabbit hole.Now I have gone back in it...I see a therapist but I have been intouch with the mental health team,as I said I was struggling again.Totally useless.

I am intouch with baylissa quite abit 💕 (love her) But I have gone into utter survival mode again.All that had gone.Feeling devastated.I had made so much progress now back at square one...

 

under huge amours of pressure back at home.Feeling frightened an very scared at this tight corner I am in. Nobody to blame but my self for trying to taper.

 

i just want my son home pb the longer this goes on the more he his growing apart from me.i am desperate to get off to get him home.. devastating.also getting sicker & weaker!my son wants too come home But too disabled too..I am on dangerous ground I can feel it..My friend as been calling me to check as she’s worried,as she’s seen a huge declone.But the spiral as a hold,am really tired emotionally..

 

trying with all i have to climb back out.

 

But totally alone frightened out of my mind to be honest.I just pray I can get through this..

 

thank you for your care 

xxxx

Pink please stop thinking about tapering ,please some mods look over pinks thread/situation.

Im no mod but get tapering out of your head for atleast a few months .its about getting stable at this stage pink .

No one but ourselves are judging not tapering as failure .we cant keep suffering so bad .

Take care pink .

[pinkfairy]

Pb thank you 

have made the decision today to hold....because my life is worth so much more than trying to get off this drug!

 

i wanted off to get my son home & get my life back...

 

its not working out that way.

 

i deserve stability & my child deserves a stable mum alive!

 

i made a huge mistake by attempting to cut.Its clear my body cannot handle any more trauma at this point...

 

my circumstances & back ground play a huge role.I don’t have the help at home.Am lucky I survived a paxil CT & z drug CT...

 

i need strength & a different head space to proceed in the future!

 

I need to try & get out of this spiral some how!I am feeding into it 24/7..I need to disengage & step back.As I have become the symtoms!

Am done putting my self & son through this.

 

i need a boat load more coping skills to proceed.

 

my therapist said this is the first time I have you heard you say 

Am done putting us through it...

 

Am in hell but there’s only one way out through!But if I can make the rest of the journey armed with strength & more skills then it’s a good hold.

 

Thank you for support & care ♥️

 

I pray your ok & remember your worth it...we’re all fellow travelers trying to navigate this **** show & come home...

 

take care my friend xxxx

[powerback]

1 hour ago, pinkfairy said:

Pb thank you 

have made the decision today to hold....because my life is worth so much more than trying to get off this drug!

 

i wanted off to get my son home & get my life back...

 

its not working out that way.

 

i deserve stability & my child deserves a stable mum alive!

 

i made a huge mistake by attempting to cut.Its clear my body cannot handle any more trauma at this point...

 

my circumstances & back ground play a huge role.I don’t have the help at home.Am lucky I survived a paxil CT & z drug CT...

 

i need strength & a different head space to proceed in the future!

 

I need to try & get out of this spiral some how!I am feeding into it 24/7..I need to disengage & step back.As I have become the symtoms!

Am done putting my self & son through this.

 

i need a boat load more coping skills to proceed.

 

my therapist said this is the first time I have you heard you say 

Am done putting us through it...

 

Am in hell but there’s only one way out through!But if I can make the rest of the journey armed with strength & more skills then it’s a good hold.

 

Thank you for support & care ♥️

 

I pray your ok & remember your worth it...we’re all fellow travelers trying to navigate this **** show & come home...

 

take care my friend xxxx

 Good stuff pink ,the goal posts get moved when the game gets too messy (apologies for that analogy ha).

Having a brutal day myself on day 3 of a full dose but hey ive got my looks 😂.

It is a sh*t show thats for sure.

Yes we are worth it pink.

Take care and talk soon.

 

[pinkfairy]

3 hours ago, powerback said:

 Good stuff pink ,the goal posts get moved when the game gets too messy (apologies for that analogy ha).

Having a brutal day myself on day 3 of a full dose but hey ive got my looks 😂.

It is a sh*t show thats for sure.

Yes we are worth it pink.

Take care and talk soon.

 

Great analogy lol 

Erm I can’t see the goal posts pb 

they go further away all the time 🙈

 

😂 looks glad you have Yours ha.

i have aged 90 years in this 

oh man what a road.

 

hey good look with the updose 

pb.

 

 

Am praying mine works.

 

Have had so much serious stress these last couple of months.so it’s not just the cut,far to much stress sends the waves very deep.But when we have to do life as well.It compounds it all.If it was just me then the journey would be lighter,not easier by any means.

 

But I have my previous son to consider in all this too.The worry of been a mum & waking up to & empty bedroom is beyond brutal & stressful..

 

So it’s a combo of factors 

stress,wave & cut & very bad sleep issues!Each wave is like acute,but after the month window it went brutal again.But just hanging in because another window could be on route 🙏🏻

 

Lord give us strength to get through this ♥️

 

As baylissa says deeper the wave the most profound healing is taking place...

 

stay safe & look after those looks 😂

 

xxxx

[powerback]

11 hours ago, pinkfairy said:

Great analogy lol 

Erm I can’t see the goal posts pb 

they go further away all the time 🙈

 

😂 looks glad you have Yours ha.

i have aged 90 years in this 

oh man what a road.

 

hey good look with the updose 

pb.

 

 

Am praying mine works.

 

Have had so much serious stress these last couple of months.so it’s not just the cut,far to much stress sends the waves very deep.But when we have to do life as well.It compounds it all.If it was just me then the journey would be lighter,not easier by any means.

 

But I have my previous son to consider in all this too.The worry of been a mum & waking up to & empty bedroom is beyond brutal & stressful..

 

So it’s a combo of factors 

stress,wave & cut & very bad sleep issues!Each wave is like acute,but after the month window it went brutal again.But just hanging in because another window could be on route 🙏🏻

 

Lord give us strength to get through this ♥️

 

As baylissa says deeper the wave the most profound healing is taking place...

 

stay safe & look after those looks 😂

 

xxxx

Ah I get it "previous" you obviously meant precious .you need to keep working on the guilt ,I'm swamped by it.but we aren't axe murdering killers so we need to check ourselves with perspective .yes it is brutal but purposely work on things that serve you not hinder you .read up on CBT  .Im practising lately about my minds perception of a situation ,its very different than the actuality .Of course with waves we cant do much but write a list for when it passes.

Drinking some hot lemon/ginger and raw garlic here ,im afraid my sore throat will turn septic or strep throat .are you still craving garlic .

lol "looks" , as you can see im very sarcastic ha .

Ye I hope your up dose works also .

Take care .

 

 

 

[pinkfairy]

42 minutes ago, powerback said:

Ah I get it "previous" you obviously meant precious .you need to keep working on the guilt ,I'm swamped by it.but we aren't axe murdering killers so we need to check ourselves with perspective .yes it is brutal but purposely work on things that serve you not hinder you .read up on CBT  .Im practising lately about my minds perception of a situation ,its very different than the actuality .Of course with waves we cant do much but write a list for when it passes.

Drinking some hot lemon/ginger and raw garlic here ,im afraid my sore throat will turn septic or strep throat .are you still craving garlic .

lol "looks" , as you can see im very sarcastic ha .

Ye I hope your up dose works also .

Take care .

 

 

 

We are defo not axe murders,so something to be grateful for ey.

 

oh no I hope it passes for you very soon.Health anxiety kicking in for you there thinking your going to get strep throat etc.This WD brain will hook on to anything.Sounds nice that drink,I drink lemon & ginger.Noooooo I stopped craving that,I am just craving everything in general now.Must be needing a dopamine hit with foods!

 

yes precious not previous 🙈.

 

yea I thought it was sarcasm lol.

 

 

i have been thinking what is the theory of a long hold.I know it’s too get stability etc.But is it not just prolonging everything.Because know matter when you start up again the tapering 

I am still going to have to go through it no matter what.if I hold for a year,in that year my body is just getting more damaged with the gaba drug!Nothing will be up regulating as the taper as stopped.

 

This is just me thinking.Plus my emotions are all blunted,cannot feel a thing.So it’s more years not feeling.more years been alone,more years not working!I know heather Ashton says there’s a thing as going to slow.I have been tapering the exact same time I have been taking the benzo...There’s no way I can taper at the moment or for ages!But this is what makes people more depressed with no end in site!This is just my thoughts.It makes me feel stuck & the dependency & fear grow of not wanting to taper.

 

when I was taking it for 3 month I should of CT am never reinstated & rode the 3 drugs out.

 

But it’s all a big nightmare learning curve.

 

I hope you feel better soon pb 🙏🏻 Keep up with the garlic 

you never know you could look 25 again soon with that drink 😆

 

take care xxx

[Leo1983]

Well hello pinkfairy. 

 

I thi k thats the best idea you had all day flower.

 

No pain no brain!!

 

Fasten the seat belt and ride it.

[powerback]

31 minutes ago, pinkfairy said:

We are defo not axe murders,so something to be grateful for ey.

 

oh no I hope it passes for you very soon.Health anxiety kicking in for you there thinking your going to get strep throat etc.This WD brain will hook on to anything.Sounds nice that drink,I drink lemon & ginger.Noooooo I stopped craving that,I am just craving everything in general now.Must be needing a dopamine hit with foods!

 

yes precious not previous 🙈.

 

yea I thought it was sarcasm lol.

 

 

i have been thinking what is the theory of a long hold.I know it’s too get stability etc.But is it not just prolonging everything.Because know matter when you start up again the tapering 

I am still going to have to go through it no matter what.if I hold for a year,in that year my body is just getting more damaged with the gaba drug!Nothing will be up regulating as the taper as stopped.

 

This is just me thinking.Plus my emotions are all blunted,cannot feel a thing.So it’s more years not feeling.more years been alone,more years not working!I know heather Ashton says there’s a thing as going to slow.I have been tapering the exact same time I have been taking the benzo...There’s no way I can taper at the moment or for ages!But this is what makes people more depressed with no end in site!This is just my thoughts.It makes me feel stuck & the dependency & fear grow of not wanting to taper.

 

when I was taking it for 3 month I should of CT am never reinstated & rode the 3 drugs out.

 

But it’s all a big nightmare learning curve.

 

I hope you feel better soon pb 🙏🏻 Keep up with the garlic 

you never know you could look 25 again soon with that drink 😆

 

take care xxx

I dont really see a rule book for serious adverse reactions or prolonged withdrawl .for now pink just get stable ,the acceptance issue needs adressing for us all ,this is hard .theres always something for the anxiety brain to worry about ,I wreckon I mite have one of the worst cases I ever seen and lived somewhat of a life .I

You make a very valid point pink but when the medical DRs dont really know what there doing half the time .Its all we have .

In my opinion there is cases were its too hard to get off drugs for what ever reason .how do we  know tho before its too late .

Anyway we soothe our souls for now pink.

Take care .

 

[pinkfairy]

45 minutes ago, Leo1983 said:

Well hello pinkfairy. 

 

I thi k thats the best idea you had all day flower.

 

No pain no brain!!

 

Fasten the seat belt and ride it.

Hello Leo 

 

i wish it was that simple to get off.

 

i have too weigh the pro’s & cons up!My situation is complex as I have to remain functional as my child is involved.Plus I want to stay alive. 

 

But the thought of taking them is sickning.

 

But I still have so much more healing to do.If it was a straight benzo WD had of been able to do it.But it’s so many other factors in this..I am physically & mentally addicted to them.So I need coping skills to replace that aspect of getting off!But I do know the longer I take them,the more they have a hold.

 

stabality is my number one priority right now!But my situation isn’t going to change by been on them either as it’s not moving forwards I don’t think.I need time,more skills & a different mind set!Even heather Ashton states mind set is everything...mines not good to get off!

Xxx

 

 

[Leo1983]

You do whats rite for you pettle.

 

I CT my drug and i have spent 6 month in hell on a daily basis. But i am guna get out of this. 

 

I have reached down and grabbed a hold of anything i can and i refuse to let go until the storm has settled. 

 

You do what you feel is guna keep you safe. Xx

[pinkfairy]

33 minutes ago, powerback said:

I dont really see a rule book for serious adverse reactions or prolonged withdrawl .for now pink just get stable ,the acceptance issue needs adressing for us all ,this is hard .theres always something for the anxiety brain to worry about ,I wreckon I mite have one of the worst cases I ever seen and lived somewhat of a life .I

You make a very valid point pink but when the medical DRs dont really know what there doing half the time .Its all we have .

In my opinion there is cases were its too hard to get off drugs for what ever reason .how do we  know tho before its too late .

Anyway we soothe our souls for now pink.

Take care .

 

Yea,I think when you have been in the trenches for a long time accepting & patience starts to get frayed...I don’t think it is p.b if it is mines right behind you on a shocking case & circumstances.

 

same here,lived a thousand times over.

 

oh had never trust a doctor or addiction specialists they have no clue!On line is our only way to freedom..

 

i spoke with una the other day,she said to get off as slowly as possible.So when you get off you stay off.She said way to many relapse because they go to quick then take years to recover.Sje said when it’s nice & slow..people walk off & have recovered in a short period of time.

 

Other drugs & so many factors are huge in this.mines fear total fear of going through it all again...

 

i thought I had lost my mind for 2 & half years.No words can articulate the horror of those CTs & where I went too...I thought I would be forever tramatized but in that window 

I wasn’t I was me but a better wiser version!

 

But the longer it goes on the fear grows.

 

my soul needs so much tlc & it’s getting it.

 

i got 5 hours of sleep last night 🙏🏻

Anxiety feels like it’s on crack today 

that’s why the what if thoughts are running wild.

 

What a ride pb.I cannot wait for the day I am drug free 🙏🏻

 

I have a phone phone call with Baylissa on Tuesday so I am looking forward to that..

xxx

[Leo1983]

Although saying that i stopped mine and each day i have felt unsafe lol. 

 

I do have days i think am i wasting my time here with this. Am i guna just change over time and wake up and say ok were is my bell bottow jeans and platforms its time to hit the town. Lol. 

[pinkfairy]

1 minute ago, Leo1983 said:

You do whats rite for you pettle.

 

I CT my drug and i have spent 6 month in hell on a daily basis. But i am guna get out of this. 

 

I have reached down and grabbed a hold of anything i can and i refuse to let go until the storm has settled. 

 

You do what you feel is guna keep you safe. Xx

Keep up with that attitude & your on your way...

I reached down to the depths after been CT multiple times.

so I do have it in me.

 

Been safe is by stopping tapering & holding.I thought I could do it 

 

nope body says nope xxx

 

[Leo1983]

Your still amazing as you continue to find a way out!

 

Keep that up and you will one day! X

 

[pinkfairy]

Absoulate hell on earth...aka 24/7 insomnia is brutal.

on fire head to toe,this updose as gone horribly horribly wrong.. So exhausted but cannot sit for 5 mins. Feels like I am been stung by a thousand bees...

 

Just taking it 5 minutes at a time & holding on for dear life at this point .Pure & utter survival mode as kicked in!

 

 

[pinkfairy]

Symtoms have lowered around teatime...been listening to Tara Brach on befriending the fear body...while hiding treats for my dogs in the house,so they could sniff them out...Had a Epsom salt bath.Lit some candles & have been doing some deep belly breaths & eft tapping on fear...I am thinking of taking dr jennifer Leah’s acceptance work shop,which starts on the 4th of December 

 

This is definitely not a race to get off!sanity needs to be kept (what’s left). 

 

 

[powerback]

3 minutes ago, pinkfairy said:

Symtoms have lowered around teatime...been listening to Tara Brach on befriending the fear body...while hiding treats for my dogs in the house,so they could sniff them out...Had a Epsom salt bath.Lit some candles & have been doing some deep belly breaths & eft tapping on fear...I am thinking of taking dr jennifer Leah’s acceptance work shop,which starts on the 4th of December 

 

This is definitely not a race to get off!sanity needs to be kept (what’s left). 

 

 

👍 ,Great pink ,the other night I was putting some lavender oil in a bowl and towl over the head and absorbing the steam .

 

 

[pinkfairy]

Just now, powerback said:

👍 ,Great pink ,the other night I was putting some lavender oil in a bowl and towl over the head and absorbing the steam .

 

 

Thanks for that tip pb I am going to try that....

 

when things get sooooo intense I dunk my head in cold water a bowl of it...Then breathe deep breaths & whoosing exhale!Its like a slap & soon grounds you...

 

i put lavender on my pillow. Before bed.

[powerback]

Just now, pinkfairy said:

Thanks for that tip pb I am going to try that....

 

when things get sooooo intense I dunk my head in cold water a bowl of it...Then breathe deep breaths & whoosing exhale!Its like a slap & soon grounds you...

 

i put lavender on my pillow. Before bed.

I put deepheat on my back before and after bed ,oh the smell lol.

[pinkfairy]

Owww bet you smell boootiful 🤔😆🙈

 

cannot believe how much my symtoms have eased up.Still in hell but the aka as subsided.

 

i eat garlic I smell great 👍🏻 (Not)

[pinkfairy]

If you get chance p.b that video with Tara Brach on befriending the fear body is really good...we have to start my giving it a name 🤔 I was perplexed,but the idea is so you don’t identify as the fear body.

 

i have had some lovely conversations tonight let’s hope the neighbours don’t hear me...

 

also brad Yates as loads of eft tapping on you tube...I will be a master of eft when this is over...