Cruizer: sertraline / Zoloft nightmare

[scallywag]

Good to read that you've had a break from symptoms. Hope it continues for you as you test making your own taper doses from sertraline tablets.

[Skeeter]

What a nice update. I hope this continues for you! Hope your sweet little family is doing well, too!

[Cruizer]

Update. After 24 days on 50mg things have still been quite reasonable. I have been fluctuating between mild to moderate symptoms for the past week. These fluctuations are during the day and consist mainly of irritability. It is not major but it is certainly noticable. I find coffee/caffeine helps. Most of the time I find I start to get a little irritable and feel a little flat around 9:30-10:30 in the morning. If I have a coffee then it perks me up and I am good for most of the day. I then start to feel irritable again towards late afternoon. If I excercise (Training or gym/weights) this generally lifts quickly.

I went to a football training last week on Monday and pulled up very sore and a bit fatigued for a few days. I plan on going again tonight as I seemed to cope quite well.

Overall this drop is still the best month I have had since I crashed in August last year.

Does anyone have any opinions/research about the caffeine helping with irritation and how this might be involved in withdrawal? Cheers

[Cruizer]

Hello all. An update from me. Today I have dropped from 50mg down to 45mg. I will note that this drop is back to my compound pharmacist so will see how the difference is. I stayed at 50mg for an extended time of 7 weeks instead of 4 weeks like I had planned. I did this for two reasons. The main reason was I caught a nasty virus from my son called "Hand Foot and Mouth" which for those who don't know is like chicken pops but on your hands, feet and mouth. It was pretty ordinary for about 7-10 days of very itchy and general flatness a virus brings. I thought it best to wait a little longer between drops. Also it was my sons 1st birthday 3 days ago and we had his party yesterday so I wanted to avoid any initial withdrawal symptoms until after this. The day went very well and I was basically symptom free so I got to enjoy it.

The pattern I am finding with my withdrawal is interesting. The first week or so after the drop I find I have those initial withdrawal feelings like headaches, a little light headed, bit of fatigue and a little out of it. Then I tend to have a good 2-3 week period where symptoms are minimal and I am feeling like my old self. Then at about that 4-6 week mark I find I start to get a little irritated and my general enthusiasm and motivation dips a little until I drop again.

What I am seeing though is that the severe symptoms are getting less and less the lower I go (touch wood). The lower the dose the less aggitation and general feelings of on edge I have. Anyways I hope everyone else who reads this is surviving. All the best!

[ChessieCat]

Good idea to hold for a bit longer because of the virus.

 

Please remember to update your signature with the new date and dose.  Thank you.

[Skeeter]

Cruizer,

You have certainly made for an interesting case here. Caffeine makes you feel better and does not go paradoxical on you like it does for many (possibly most?) around here.  Any issues with sleep after the caffeine, or any changes in your sleep if you have more coffee/caffeine than you usually have?  I am glad you have not have to take off of football like I feared.  For you it is a yearly ritual, so I can understand not wanting to miss it.  Ho is everything at work and home- has the irritability caused any issues for you, or are you on top of it?  With my neverending pain, irritability is a constant, but I am very good at not letting it show through, because I told myself it is no one else's fault that my pain is so bad, so why should they suffer like me (if that makes sense).  I hope things are still going well for you at work and at home (and at football.  Hope the irritability is not too much for you to handle if no coffee is available!  So sorry that you got the virus, but I an glad that you did not have major issues for holding so long.  I truly hope all is bearable, and you are making it through this as well as you seem to be!!

 

Be well!

Skeeter

[Cruizer]

Cruizer,

You have certainly made for an interesting case here. Caffeine makes you feel better and does not go paradoxical on you like it does for many (possibly most?) around here.  Any issues with sleep after the caffeine, or any changes in your sleep if you have more coffee/caffeine than you usually have?  I am glad you have not have to take off of football like I feared.  For you it is a yearly ritual, so I can understand not wanting to miss it.  Ho is everything at work and home- has the irritability caused any issues for you, or are you on top of it?  With my neverending pain, irritability is a constant, but I am very good at not letting it show through, because I told myself it is no one else's fault that my pain is so bad, so why should they suffer like me (if that makes sense).  I hope things are still going well for you at work and at home (and at football.  Hope the irritability is not too much for you to handle if no coffee is available!  So sorry that you got the virus, but I an glad that you did not have major issues for holding so long.  I truly hope all is bearable, and you are making it through this as well as you seem to be!!

 

Be well!

Skeeter

Hi Skeeter,

I tend to not have more than 1 coffee a day. If I buy a coffee while I am out on the road with work these maybe double shots but I am not one of those people that has 4-5 cups a day or anything. I just find it perks me up enough to feel quite normal. Work is busy and I am enjoying it. Home life is also good but a little challenging with my son who is 1 and still does not sleep through the night. I can definitely tell when I am starting to get irritated so I generally do some excercise or something sort of activity around the house. I find that if I am on the go it helps. Training and playing football seems to be helping also, although if I do over do it a bit I find a for the next day or so I can be irritated as well as fatigued and sore. The way I am feeling is still not ideal, but it is bearable. I have always said mild to moderate symptoms are bearable but it is when they start getting severe it becomes difficult. So far since I have started to drop again from my long hold I have only had 5 severe days in 3 months which has been a welcome relief.

[Skeeter]

Cruizer,

 

That is wonderful.  Great to hear.  Your coffee sounds like it is certainly not too much, but be aware, during a taper, coffee- even at small amounts can turn paradoxical, and make you anxious.  You will know if this happens, just wanted to caution you so you did not wonder what was going on if it happens to you, by chance.

 

You may want to keep the intensity of your workout's, because you do need time for your body to sort things out, and your brain is adjusting to the changes, it does not just heal in 30 days, it is an ongoing process.  if you are feeling irritated after possibly overdoing it, this could be your brain's way of saying slow down if yo are feeling irritable.  You can have your cake and eat it too, but please be careful, as you do not want to have any reason for your CNS to destabilize.  I am not saying that you are going to get worse if you keep pushing it, but just be aware that you are having warning signals, so take it a little easier, maybe?  It is up to you, but I just want to ensure you do not end up in a bad place again is all. You do not want to be irritable with a one year old, they take a lot of energy (and diapers...lol).

 

be well!

Skeeter

[scallywag]

Cruizer, I tapered caffeinated coffee last fall. I started first with confining my coffee consumption to my home brew. Then I bought both regular and decaf coffee. I mixed up about 1-2 weeks worth at a time with increasing proportions of decaf. I think I went something like this:

1 part decaf: 7 parts regular

2:6

3:5

4:4

5:3

6:2

7:1

8 parts decaffeinated.

Then I switched to drinking it black!

 

It took a while but I had NO days where I had the dragged-out "NEED MY CAFFEEEEEEEEEEEEEEIIIINNNNNNNNNEE" feelings or thoughts.

[Cruizer]

Hi all, i hope everyone reading this is surviving and doing ok.

Update from me as it has been a month or so since i posted.

Withdrawal itself is going ok, my symptoms are mainly mild to moderate most days. I have not had a really bad day for a few months now; some almost there but not quite. My taper is going slowly and am currently at 45mg sertraline.

I have had some rotten luck with my health lately which is why i have slowed down on tapering. First i had hand foot and mouth which is a virus i got from my toddler who got this from child care. This lasted about 10 days; then i had a rather nasty cough and migraine episode around a week later that lasted for almost 3 weeks. And then, about a week after getting over that i broke my collarbone playing football and had to have surgery. That has put me on my arse for the last 2 weeks and unfortuantely i have had to take oxycodein a lot to handle the pain post operation. I have stopped the pain killers now and have been smashed by another flu. I feel like i may have smashed a few mirrors in my sleep with this luck i have had in the last 3 months. Anyway i am starting to get some anxiety back and i am pretty sure it is from me stopping the oxycodein and pain killers. I always have problems a few days after taking different meds. I seem to be really sensitive to this. I hope this will pass in a few days and i can hopefully get back on track. Cheers

[Cruizer]

Hello all. I thought it was about time i posted at it has been about 6 months since my last contact. Last post 6 months ago i was on 45mg of zoloft. I am now down to 27mg and going pretty reasonably. I still have symptoms of some degree basically every day but they are mostly mild to moderate. 

I went away on a golf trip for about 8 days at the end of september and drank more alcohol in those 8 days than i would have in the last 2 years. I paid for it when i got back but only for a few days on moderate to severe symptoms. Then i had another long stretch of about 3 weeks of just mild symptoms. 

I have tried something new in the last 6 months and that is to drop 5% every 2 weeks rather than 10% in one hit for 4 week holds. I find this helps with some of the head symptoms like headaches, brain fog and head pressure. 

If i stay on course with how i am going than i should be off of this poison in about 18 months. This means i am past the half way point of this nightmare we call withdrawal. 

I also found out a few months back that my wife is pregnant with our 2nd child. I should be around the 15mg mark by the time it is born with about a year to go. 

My main symptoms o struggle with daily now is some what similar since the start which is irritability, feeling flat/fatigued and sometimes i get brain fog and find it hard to string sentences together for a day or two. Depression creeps in every now and then but comes and goes quite quickly. 

I hope everyone reading this is doing ok and surviving. I just keep telling myself that there will be something better for me at the end of all this. There has been many people before me who have gotten better and it is only a matter of time before you and I do too. Cheers

 

[ChessieCat]

Hi Cruiser,

 

Thanks for dropping back in to let us know how your are going.  And congratulations to you both on being pregnant.

 

Please update your signature with the dates and doses of your reductions since March 2017.  Thank you.  Account Settings – Create or Edit a signature

 

I'm concerned about you saying that you should be off in about 18 months' time.  I'm currently on 17mg Pristiq and won't be down to 1mg until 22 November 2019 which is 2 years' time reducing 10% of the previous dose with 4 week holds.  I know that I probably won't be off until at least the middle of 2020.  I am happy to take my time and get off with minimal withdrawals.

 

When to end the taper and jump to zero?

 

Tapering Calculator - Online

 

Many members find that as their dose gets lower they need to go slower.

 

Why taper paper: dose-occupancy curves

[Cruizer]

Hi Chessiecat. Thanks for the concern. There is a few reasons why in 18 months i am looking to be off. One of the main reasons is my compound pharmacist can only cut down in mg and not decimals meaning i have to drop at least 1mg at a time. However in saying that everyone reacts differently to withdrawal and drops in dosage. Generally when i drop dosage I round to the closest mg. Once i hit the 20mg mark i will drop at a rate of 2mg per month until i am at 10mg. I will add that i plan to drop at 1mg every 2 weeks from 20mg - 10mg. Therefore it should take me around 5-6 months to go from 20mg-10mg. Then from 10 i will drop 1mg per month therefore taking a further 10 months to go from 10 to 0.

In total i would have spent close to 3 and a half years tapering from 150mg to 0. Now this is not a lock in schedule but this a long taper of 3.5 years and i figure being still in my early 30's i may/should recover a little faster than someone who is older. I also believe that although we are recovering and adjusting during our tapers, the most healing will take place without any drug in our system. I would also like to add that this medication has never agreed with me and has been the cause of 99% of my anxiety/depression since going on it. 

[ChessieCat]

Hi Cruizer,

 

I am also getting my drug compounded.  To get down from 20mg to 10mg I am reducing by 1mg for 3 weeks until I get closer to 10mg and then I will reduce by 1mg for 4 weeks.

 

It is possible and very easy to make a liquid from Zoloft tablets to get smaller doses.  You could take a combined dose of compounded capsule + liquid to create the dose your require and then change to all liquid once you get lower.

 

From:  Tips for tapering off Zoloft (sertraline)

 

"Make your own liquid
Many people make their own Zoloft liquid out of tablets and water. See How to make a liquid from tablets or capsules"

[Cruizer]

Hello all, today marks a significant milestone for me. It is 2 years since I began my taper off of sertraline (zoloft). 

I started at 150mg daily and over these last 2 years i have made it down to 20mg daily. To say it has been a challenge is a massive understatement as most here can appreciate. Hopefully in another 2 years time (or less hopefully) i will be off of this poison for good and starting to enjoy life again. This is and will most likely be the hardest thing I will have to experience in my life. Some days it can be extremely difficult to even want to keep pushing on through this, but it is sites like this one that offer hope at making it through this hell and for that i will be forever grateful. Keep pushing through everyone. 

[nz11]

You are doing great cruizer .Well done.

[RachelSusan]

Hello Cruizer,

 

Congrats to you. It is hard work, isn't it?  I'm so impressed with you sticking to it.

 

Also thank you for giving me hope.  I am a Zoloft victim as well.  It's been a little over a year and a half for me. We will both get off this stuff.

 

Warm wishes,

Rachel

[wantrelief]

Wow - so impressed with what you have accomplished; you should be so proud of all of your hard work!

[Cruizer]

Have had a significant increase in aggitation and anxiety in the past week. This is the worst I have felt in over 12 months. I had an operation about 3 weeks ago where i had two procedurea done at the same time (knee and collarbone). I am hoping that maybe the  anaesthesia might have impacted my sypmtoms???

I am really scared at the moment as this is the worst i have felt in over 12 months. I am due to drop from 20mg to 19mg in the next few days. Normally when i drop i feel better. I really am lost at the moment

[Cruizer]

Well the last 10 days have been a nightmare and really reminded me of how bad withdrawal can be! I had 3 very severe days which i have not had in over 12 months. Today i have calmed a lot and am back to more moderate symotoms but the last week and a bit was terrifying. It seemed to come out of nowhere. I am really hoping it may have been a reaction to the anaesthesia from a couple of weeks back. 

The strange thing for me though is ever since i have been tapering, my reactions seem to be quite delayed. Example, alcohol can set me off with increased symptoms but only 4-5 days after drinking. It is the same with when i took antihistamines, and also ibuprofen. Symptoms arose much later like a delay. I figured that maybe i take a while to register change but today i dropped from 20mg to 19mg of zoloft and felt better... however i did recognise the head symptoms i get when dropping a dose straight away which is a normal occurrence for me. Its very weird. Anyone have thoughts here??

Im hoping that the very severe episode will be a one off and i will continue tapering at approx 10% a month with similar mild to moderate symptoms. 

[Cruizer]

I have made the decision to hold at my current dosage (19mg) for a few months at least. This last 6 weeks has been to worst withdrawal as an avg since i started tapering over 2 years ago. I am waking early in the morning with racing pulse most days and have a general feeling of anxiety that is with me most of the day. Night time starts to see a change a bit and if I exercise i can get back to feeling some what normal for a few hours. I am expecting my second child to be born in the next 6 weeks so i think now is a good time to take a break from tapering. I have been searching through this website looking for guidance that i am doing the right thing and that this period will end soon. Anu advice/encouragement would be greatly appreciated. Thanks 

[ChessieCat]

I think holding is a good idea.  You have a period added stress in the near future (both good and bad stress!).

 

It is hard to know if you worsening symptoms are directly related to your dose reduction or from your current life circumstances.  It may be a combination of the two.

 

When you do make your next reduction you might want to consider reducing by less than 10% of the previous dose.  I can see that you have been making 5mg reductions each time.  The last reduction was exactly 10% of 50mg.  I'm don't know if you were planning on continuing to reduce 5mg each time.  You really shouldn't be reducing by more than 10%.  If you continue reducing by 5mg each reduction will be a larger percentage reduction.

 

You could always try a 5% reduction next time to see how you go.  If things went okay you might be able to reduce again after 3 weeks.  You could continue reducing by 5% or you could increase it to 10% and hold for a minimum of 4 weeks.  It's better to get off slowly and with minimal symptoms than to have your life disrupted by withdrawal.  We will get there eventually.

 

All the best to you and your wife with the new baby.

[Cruizer]

30 minutes ago, ChessieCat said:

I think holding is a good idea.  You have a period added stress in the near future (both good and bad stress!).

 

It is hard to know if you worsening symptoms are directly related to your dose reduction or from your current life circumstances.  It may be a combination of the two.

 

When you do make your next reduction you might want to consider reducing by less than 10% of the previous dose.  I can see that you have been making 5mg reductions each time.  The last reduction was exactly 10% of 50mg.  I'm don't know if you were planning on continuing to reduce 5mg each time.  You really shouldn't be reducing by more than 10%.  If you continue reducing by 5mg each reduction will be a larger percentage reduction.

 

You could always try a 5% reduction next time to see how you go.  If things went okay you might be able to reduce again after 3 weeks.  You could continue reducing by 5% or you could increase it to 10% and hold for a minimum of 4 weeks.  It's better to get off slowly and with minimal symptoms than to have your life disrupted by withdrawal.  We will get there eventually.

 

All the best to you and your wife with the new baby.

I have not updated my signature for a while. I am at 19mg now and have been going at 5% drops every 2 weeks. Like i mentioned in a post a few weeks ago i had surgery 6 weeks ago today to remove a plate and screws from collarbone as well as had a procedure on my knee at the same time. It seems to have escalated a lot from there. All i know is that these last 4 weeks have been hell. Do you think the surgery and anaesthesia might have something to do with my escalation in symptoms? Thanks for replying

[ChessieCat]

Sorry I'm still getting 2017 and 2018 muddled up 

 

Please update your signature whenever you make a change.  This way your history remains current and we can easily see it at a glance and not have to read back and find the information in your posts.  Thank you.  Account Settings – Create or Edit a signature

 

Yes, the stress of the surgery and the drugs used can worsen withdrawal symptoms.  Other members have mentioned the same thing.

 

Here is a discussion: surgery-and-anesthesia

 

[Cruizer]

Thanks Chessie Cat. I have updated my signature now. I keep a daily journal and rank my daily avg of symptoms between 0 and 4. 0 = no symptoms, 1 = mild, 2 = moderate, 3 = severe and 4 = very severe. Since January 2017 my monthly avg is around 1.45 which means i am having more than half the month at mild or below. Then this month that avg has jumped to 2.55 which is a massive jump. Nothing much has changed aside from the surgery and i am getting down into the teens now on my dosage. It is scary and i am hoping by holding i will start to improve shortly. 

[ChessieCat]

Thank you for updating your signature.  I'm pleased that you are being keeping notes.  It is best to hold if things aren't stable.

 

Stabilising After a Reduction - What Does That Mean?

Withdrawal Normal Description

 

Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization

[Cruizer]

Hi all. I have been travelling very ordinary since my decision to hold at 19mg. It has been about 7 weeks since my last 5% drop but i was already unstable when i dropped. In those 7 weeks i have had some small windows of a few days but i am having another horrible wave at the moment that progressed to severe on monday. I wake at 5am with racing pulse and general feeling of dread that the day has started like this. I then have what i call "micro dreams" for about an hour or so where i fall back asleep for say 5 minutes and then dream of very random things like talking to my neighbor or crossing the road with a sheep. I suddenly realise this is a dream and i wake again and realise it is 5 minute since the last time i looked at the clock. I then get up at 630ish and can sometimes vomit. I can also thrash around in bed with severe aggitation. The only thing that helps is if i get up and go for a walk around the neighbourhood. The rest of the day can be up and down with crying spells and general nausea and irritation. Somehow i am still managing to work fulltime but my job is as a sales rep which allows me a bit of freedom to take an hour off here and there if needed as well as work at my own pace. My wife is being induced next week with our 2nd child so this has not come at a good time. 

I had a period about 18 months ago where i held my dose for 5 months trying to stabilise but seemed to be getting worse instead. I then started to taper again and i started to feel better. I am a little lost of what to do here.... i feel i should hold for a good few months in hope i stabilise to minimal symptoms before tapering slowly again??

[RachelSusan]

Hello Cruizer,

 

Sertraline victim here as well. My suggestions here are based strictly on my own experience.

 

If I were you I would not attempt another drop until I am stable.  Only you can decide what stable is.  Once you do start tapering again you might want to consider dropping less than 5% at a time, think 2 to 3%. If you have trouble cutting pills you can try liquid Sertaline, but if you do you might want to discuss with a moderator on how to transition from hard pill to liquid.  That alone can put you in a position of withdrawal if not done properly. Also consider leaving more time between drops, like a month in between.  Don't let your reaction time to the taper fool you.  I've had reactions 2 days after a drop and I've had reactions months after a drop. That's what makes it all so confusing and disorienting. I want to find a pattern in all of this and right when I think I have it figured out it changes again. This is a monster of a drug to get off of, but you can do it.  Just take it nice and slow. 

 

Congrats on the upcoming birth of your child. While very exciting it does sound like a bad time for you to be having withdrawal symptoms. I wasn't sure if you were asking for suggestion on what to do now, or in the big picture. If the symptoms are too horrible now, you could up-dose a TINY amount.  It is an option to consider but there is no guarantee, and if you are willing to ride it out you would at least be closer to your goal of getting off. As a point of reference, the last time I went too fast on my taper it took me three months to stabilize again. I was ready to up-dose too but my mod suggested I just hold instead, and I'm glad I did. My goal is always to go down, not up. Your situation is a little more complex due to the baby coming. Good luck with your recovery.

[Cruizer]

Thanks for the post Rachel. I will be riding this out for now. I have never really had any positive effects from updosing, normally makes things worse. I will be holding for a long while to see how much my overall symptoms reduce. When i do start to taper again i will be going at 5% a month instead of every 2 weeks. I had a snoop through your page and saw your down to 4.5mg and doing pretty well. Good on you. That is a dream for me at the moment but hopefully will get there at some point. At this stage i am only concerned with stabilizing and getting some kind of normal. One thing that is concerning me a little is the sport i play. I play aussie rules football and train once a week as well as play a game. I know excercise is important in withdrawal and i do get a lift when i do excercise, but im concerned it might be hampering me to stabilize?... im playing round 1 today and am in the middle of a severe wave. I am still going to play and see how i go. Cheers

[ChessieCat]

Have you seen this:  Brass Monkey Slide

[RachelSusan]

On 4/6/2018 at 2:39 PM, Cruizer said:

 One thing that is concerning me a little is the sport i play. I play aussie rules football and train once a week as well as play a game. I know excercise is important in withdrawal and i do get a lift when i do excercise, but im concerned it might be hampering me to stabilize?... im playing round 1 today and am in the middle of a severe wave. I am still going to play and see how i go. Cheers

Hi Cruizer,

I think it great if you can continue to play football and exercise. Some people have a problem with exercise during withdrawal and some don't.  All you can do is try and see how you feel.  If you are worse then you know, if you aren't and your enjoy it then at least that's one thing you enjoy that you can continue to do. Playing on a team and training is the best thing ever.  My husband plays baseball every week and I know how much he loves it and hanging out with his friends afterwards.  My fingers are crossed that you played, had no problems and can continue to play.

[Cruizer]

Thanks for the post Rachel. I played yesterday and despite feeling avg before i played well and got Best on ground and kicked 5 goals. Today my symptoms have lifted slightly. I am sore and flat but that is from playing football. I think i should be ok to continue playing. It is something that i still get some joy from and is a good distraction as well as giving me a break from life stresses and obviously withdrawal. 

 

Chessie i have seen the brass monkey slide before and like the idea. I was kind of doing something similar before with 5% cuts every 2 weeks. My only issue is i am in Australia and liquid zoloft is not available. I know you can dissolve tablets and make your own up but im a little concerned with how accurate this might be. At the moment i have my tablets compounded and will probably stay that way until i start needing to cut less than half a mg. That is a bit away at the moment so i will cross that bridge when im lower. 

 

Cheers all for having a chat and helping me through a rough patch. 

[Cruizer]

Hello fellow survivors. I hope everyone is doing ok. I thought it was time i did an update as i need some advice. 

As per previous posts i had a significant increase in symptoms in February and have been holding at 19mg since the 15h of February so just over 4 months now. Things started to settle down after about 2.5 to 3 months of the hold and o would say that i am close to being back to where i was in January before my increase. However i am no where near 100% in terms of no symptoms. Most days i have either mild to moderate symptoms which mainly consists of lack of motivation and feeling quite numb and disinterested in most things. This can be up and down during the day. Unfortunately around 2 weeks ago i broke my collarbone again for the 2nd time in 12 months so excercise at the moment is at zero. 

I guess my question really is should i continue holding until i have no symptoms or should i begin tapering slowly again? My plan is to drop 1mg per month until i get down to 10mg and the reassess. 

I have come from 150mg to 19mg over a 2 year period and have been holding there. This medication never agreed with me and i had similar symptoms whilst on it for 6 years. However not as consistent as during withdrawal so i am a little lost on what my next move is. ??

[RachelSusan]

Here's what I did when I was in your same situation.  I held.  I held until there were barely and symptoms left. For me that was around over four months. I was afraid that if started a taper too soon it would all start up again.  I am on Sertraline as well.  I am now very glad I held. It has given me as strong foundation to launch from.  This time around I am tapering about 3% a month.  Much Much better.  You asked for an opinion, and this is mine.  Good luck to you and I hope that whatever you end up doing works for you.

RS

[Cruizer]

Thanks for the advice RS. I appreciate it. I think this is what i will do. I am certainly doing better than i was 3 months ago but do still have 3 or 4 severe days a month (alot better than 13-15). I guess like everyone i get frustrated with how slow this is and just want my life back. I have 2 young boys and i just wish i would get more reward emotionally when i spend time with them. Dont get me wrong i do get enjoyment but it is always clouded by the symptoms of withdrawal. Cheers for the advice

[Cruizer]

Hi all. I was reading through Brass Monkeys topic in symptoms and selfcare about how long wd lasts and all the ins and outs. Great info there and really makes it quite clear regarding recovery and what to expect. 

My question is he mentions about "WDnormal" meaning this is your kind of baseline wd feeling through the months/years of recovery. Its not good but its not aweful. I feel this is where i am at i think. Most days i feel quite similar which is just a feeling of mental numbness. I get periods throughout the day where i feel quite normal and productive at work or at home etc. but then have periods of feeling flat and disinterested in doing much at all. This is a far cry from the severe anxiety and aggitation i felt 3-4 months ago when i felt like i crashed. I dont have much panic/anxiety anymore and i rarely wake with the dreaded cortisol spikes etc. So i guess my question is am i at stability? Am i at my "WDnormal" and should i begin to taper again? Currently holding at 19mg of zoloft and have been for 5 months. @brassmonkey