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mickde1

mickde1: life on hold

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mickde1

Hi all,  first post, any advice i welcome with open arms  i don't know if i may be able to help anyone but anyway this is my experience 

 

It's been 1 year and 2 weeks since the  last  dose, still no light at the end of the tunnel getting straight to the point  its still all doom and gloom   depression intrusive thoughts negativity  mental fatigue  ( mental incapacitation )  fear and anxiety, the physicality, constantly feeling hungover and exhausted a  magnet heavy like feeling flowing through limbs and body that has not ever let up    insomnia palpitations cramp the ability to cope is eroded the ability to cope with everyday issues  is lost as it   all continues, so many times i think of going back on the meds  but i read and see  this can turn out to be a worse scenario i read about amino acids could help with the symptoms  but fear stops me.  my life  - living is on hold i'm not  half the man i once  was

 

It demoralises me as all others in this situation including  member of this  forum, nothing has changed for a long time i'm stuck in this groove but still  hanging in there

 

So far in my experience i have found  no relief to this continuum, the intensity is always there  it just morphs itself into other symptoms and keeps evolving 

 i have tried many many things more than i can count on my  hands and feet it becomes like the search for the Holy Grail for relief, nothing works 

 

My last search has taken me to a functional medicine doctor had all these test carried out and have been diagnosed  as being slightly undermethylated, elevated histamine  causes  mental health problems and pyroluria genetical chemical imbalance related to blood carrying different things for health functions it also cause mental health problems 

 

The doc has had  tailor made nutrients made for  the pyroluria, 2 months i have been take it  can't tell if its made any difference 

the undermethylation remedy i'm waiting for it to arrive 

 

Meanwhile  determination courage i try to muster and trying to believe in a better outcome but with so much doubt 

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doggiemama

Hi mic sorry that I can be of no help to you as I'm in the same boat after 2years 3months but I can promise you it does get better I only saw changes after a year . I must add that I have had a very hard year so anxiety and stress is a factor. When I'm feeling very stressed I get into a bath with a cup of epsom salts and it does help. I have on many occations thought of going back on meds but I'm so scared of the WD again or that it makes things worse Be strong

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mickde1

Thanks doggiemama for view and encouragement 

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mickde1

Should a person reinstate  after 3 years  of total  torture 

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ChessieCat

Hi mickde and welcome back to SA,

 

I've moved your post to your Intro topic, which is the place to ask questions about your own situation and where you can journal your progress.  It keeps your history in one place.

 

Please update your drug signature so that we have accurate information about your drug history.  Please use the following format which allows us to see your history at a glance.  Thank you.

 

Please make it nice and simple by following these instructions (NO diagnoses or symptoms please - thank you):

  • details for last 2 years - dates, ALL drugs, doses
  • summary for older than 2 years - just years and drug/s

Account Settings – Create or Edit a signature

 

 

Q:  What are your current symptoms?

 

The following quote says that you have taken Lamictal in the past.  Please include ALL drugs in your drug signature.  Thank you.

 

On 4/13/2018 at 10:54 AM, mickde1 said:

Lamictal didn't agree with me  i was wondering whether there are some other  ways  to correct this action of  locus coeruleus "fight or flight"  disinhibited and the glutamatergic system  i have read somewhere that vitamin B6  in the  form of pyridoxal-5-phosphate, green tea camomile tea  and  zinc all help  ( i don't know what i have done with the text ?? )

If anyone has any information  it will be greatly welcomed 

 

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ChessieCat

Please respond to my previous requests.  Thank you.

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mickde1

Hi Chessie Cat

I'm not exactly sure on how to do what you've asked for, is it a copy and paste  and whereabouts on the Topic list should it go?

please explain the process sorry 

 

 

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ChessieCat

Please answer these questions:

 

Q:  What are your current symptoms?

 

Q:  How bad are your current symptoms?

 

Also, please click on this link  Account Settings – Create or Edit a signature and add the information about Lamictal and the dates and doses you took it to your drug signature.

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Aquarius

Hi mickde1

Im sorry you are suffering too i find sometimes the harder i try to fix something the more broken it becomes allowing time to pass and listening to the advice from the moderators is a must try to keep things simple and dont look for quick fixes be kind to yourself you are healing you have to believe that i listen to talks by dr claire weekes on youtube she makes sense the harder you try to get better the worse it gets sometimes you have to let things resolve themselves again listen to the mods they are here to help you through this and it will happen

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mickde1
15 minutes ago, ChessieCat said:

Please answer these questions:

 

Q:  What are your current symptoms?

 

Q:  How bad are your current symptoms?

 

Also, please click on this link  Account Settings – Create or Edit a signature and add the information about Lamictal and the dates and doses you took it to your drug signature.

Current symptoms experiencing  bad bouts of  anxiety  with depression horror  scary thoughts its indescribable,  they  are worst in the early morning  and are there all day   i have a radio playing at night so i  can try to  concentrate  and focus hard struggling  to divert  my mind  away  from this existence at night 

The insomnia,  haven't slept for nearly 3 years , anhedonia  intrusive thoughts and fear mental fatigue and memory  losing  total focus  losing it .

 

   I can't afford to get tied up in  it  because it only feeds the condition and makes it worse the tinnitus doesn't really concern me because all the other symptoms happening  are my concern 

Physically i have pain throughout my body like a fibromyalgia feels like something is pulling on  my arms and legs nerves and muscles with constant micro spasms , twitches  and leg cramps i get real sick in the  stomach every morning  i have to go to the toilet my number two have never been the same if you know what i mean, my skin itches and sometimes i can't scratch the itch away it stays on  sometimes its like having cat hair on you  my skin  is not in good condition.... i'll stop here 

 

Regards Mickde1

 

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Aquarius

Have you read Pugs success story he had so mamy symptons as well

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Altostrata

Hello, mickde.

 

That does sound like post-acute withdrawal syndrome.

 

Perhaps you can work on your sleep. Even a little bit of improvement gradually builds up. The key is to keep the bedroom very dark and get off the computer early. See

 

Tips to help sleep -- so many of us have that awful withdrawal insomnia 

 

Waking with panic or anxiety -- managing cortisol spikes

 

What is the sleep cycle?

 

Can you get melatonin? A small amount to start, such as 0.25mg, might initiate the sleep cycle. Melatonin for sleep: Many people find it helpful

 

A lot of people find fish oil and magnesium supplements helpful, see
http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/36-king-of-supplements-omega-3-fatty-acids-fish-oil/ http://survivingantidepressants.org/topic/15483-magnesium-natures-calcium-channel-blocker/

 

Try a little bit of one at a time to see how it affects you. Magnesium in particular can be calming, you can put powder in water and sip it throughout the day.

 

Playing very soft music all night, such as meditation or trance music, can be calming to the nervous system. Meditation is also a good technique to use, see Easing your way into meditation for a stressed-out nervous system

 

Are you also getting at least a half-hour of gentle exercise, such as walking, every day?

 

These are the gentlest ways to calm your symptoms. Please let us know how you're doing.

 

Trying a very low dose reinstatement is possible, but more risky. I would try the gentler methods first.

 

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mickde1

Thanks  Altostrata 

I have tried many of your suggestions over the years  for trying to get sleep melatonin, lamictal,lactium and various many  others, with a real low and slow dosage i get a bad reaction that can last for weeks its very enduring  frustrating and disheartening, inositol i'm trialing at the moment has a slight benefit, nightshades and heavy window curtains has been a part to the bed room landscape 

 

I'm 63 years old and have a few medical issues prostate, i have been taking curcumin for three years its brought my reading down to a much healthier level i have sugar diabetes 2 i take arborvitae ( maritime french pine bark extract ) its brought down my level into a healthy ready with jogging three times a week , cholesterol i've regulated back into healthier  levels, well the high blood pressure reading i put down to the nervous system over stress i don't have salt and to expand on this i don't take sugar, coffee, alcohol, no drugs, minimal carbs, i've been taking   am and pm functional compounding nutrients for two years, i completed all these test the body showed the things that were lacking and missing i also use hyperbaric chamber twice a week i read somewhere a doctor saying it was the only thing he knew that relieved WDS the psychologist i see, cbt and various meditations, breathing  therapies i have a swag off them there is nothing of all the many many many types i know that work all the time sometimes there isn't any relief to be found that becomes evident very early takes the air away from your sail any hope you have is gone but somehow some way 

 

There's really nothing that i have found to calm my nervous system down believe me i have tried many things searched high and and low spent hundred of hours doing so 

 

The sensitivity  make have calmed down a bit over time but i can fall back to times as bad as at the start i never forget the time i was laying in bed one night listening to the radio,  Jeremy  by Pearl  Jam started playing i knew the story of the song the horror emerged in an instants that engulfed me was something well i can't explain it terrifying panic attack i don't know ?  i lived for a long long time in total fear of dying, at night having a  drink of water would somehow put the fear of drowning into me ? took a long time for this to diminish and disappear 

 

 

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Altostrata

I'm sorry none of those gentle interventions worked for you, mick.

 

It has been nearly 2 years since you last posted, if you had asked earlier, you might have been able to try reinstatement earlier.

 

Even now, reinstating perhaps 0.5mg Prozac might be worth a try. See

 

About reinstating and stabilizing to reduce withdrawal symptoms

 

Liquid Prozac is the best way to take a low dose, this topic explains how Tips for tapering off Prozac (fluoxetine)

 

You'd taper off by miniscule amounts later.

 

Another option might be Lamictal (lamotrigine) to calm post-discontinuation withdrawal symptoms but the drug is quite tricky, you have to be careful not to take too much.

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mickde1

2 years ago i couldn't comprehend how to navigate my way around this forum and basically lost all faith and any belief  somehow i thought  you guy's couldn't help i don't know why

 

Lamictal on micro doses didn't work for me it exacerbated the symptoms and felt worse did nothing for sleeping  after 3 weeks i had no choice but to stop took  about 6 weeks or more  to settle down  this is the case for everything i've tried....... Rhodiola Rosea at a very  low dose worked good for about 2 weeks then it happened again  

prozac scares the life out of me i'll think it over for a few day

 

Thanks Altostrata

 

 

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mickde1

Is this the only hope i have to try to reinstate prozac ?

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Madeleine

Have you tried meditation?    What about activities to calm your mind, walking, praying, being involved in a group activity such as volunteering where your mind gets off your own problems?  What got you onto prozac in the first place, and have you solved the issues that led to prozac and the Mirtazapine?  If those issues are unresolved, they could also be causing anxiety, and maybe in that case some kind of psychotherapy could help? If you can't afford it, then look into self-help therapy books such as Feeling Good by David Burns, or Full Catastrophe Living by John Kabat Zinn, the Power of Positive Thinking by Norman Vincent Peale. 

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mickde1

My condition has  worsened  since started  posting this, its getting to me the comments replay in my mind  it's rammed up the symptoms i feel so hopeless and isolated beyond help i cant help it, seem to be nothing to help me i dont know where to turn  ideation of suicide start to creep in i dont know where to get help

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ChessieCat

If you are feeling suicidal you should contact local support services.  This is SA's topic:  for-those-who-are-feeling-desperate-or-suicidal

 

I've just done a google search and found these which have links to helpful information:

 

https://www.suicidecallbackservice.org.au/resources/feeling-suicidal/

 

https://au.reachout.com/tough-times/suicide

 

https://suicideprevention.com.au/

 

List of contacts:

 

https://communitiesmatter.suicidepreventionaust.org/content/useful-contacts

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mickde1

Its just thoughts its disheartening depressing where to go from here after talking to you guys, its not your fault  i dont feel there is much help i thought there i may of had some options it doesnt appear to be thats probably the effect of all this experience im worse off unfortunately 

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Altostrata

That is correct, it's just thoughts. Let them pass through and turn your mind to constructive activities.

 

If you dwell on your troubles, your bruised nervous system will hurt even more. You can make yourself worse by worrying. Do what you can to stop that.

 

On 12/14/2018 at 4:37 AM, mickde1 said:

Lamictal on micro doses didn't work for me it exacerbated the symptoms and felt worse did nothing for sleeping  after 3 weeks i had no choice but to stop took  about 6 weeks or more  to settle down 

 

Exactly how much Lamictal did you take? What effect did it have on you? It sounds like the dosage you took was too high.

 

Some people wait out withdrawal syndrome. Improvement is very gradual and frustrating. You will need to stay calm and have an attitude of self-care rather than self-induced anxiety to do this.

 

Are you taking fish oil and magnesium supplements?

 

 

 

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mickde1

I started at  half a mg and  ended at  1mg  after  three weeks  i end up feeling worst  it just explodes in me  it took a long time to settle down again i always get  hopeful  and it ends up  killing all hope and makes depression come to the fore im struggling with it badly right now  

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mickde1

ive been take omega 3 for three years i took magnesium for a while may be 2 months i took another turn  so  i stop it 

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mickde1

i just went and checked   fridge wherei keep these things where tens upon tens of things that i've tried are stored   it was magnesium citrate i have tried a few others 

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mickde1
1 hour ago, mickde1 said:

i just went and checked   fridge wherei keep these things where tens upon tens of things that i've tried are stored   it was magnesium citrate i have tried a few others 

Hi all,  first post, any advice i welcome with open arms  i don't know if i may be able to help anyone but anyway this is my experience 

 

It's been 1 year and 2 weeks since the  last  dose, still no light at the end of the tunnel getting straight to the point  its still all doom and gloom   depression intrusive thoughts negativity  mental fatigue  ( mental incapacitation )  fear and anxiety, the physicality, constantly feeling hungover and exhausted a  magnet heavy like feeling flowing through limbs and body that has not ever let up    insomnia palpitations cramp the ability to cope is eroded the ability to cope with everyday issues  is lost as it   all continues, so many times i think of going back on the meds  but i read and see  this can turn out to be a worse scenario i read about amino acids could help with the symptoms  but fear stops me.  my life  - living is on hold i'm not  half the man i once  was

 

It demoralises me as all others in this situation including  member of this  forum, nothing has changed for a long time i'm stuck in this groove but still  hanging in there

 

So far in my experience i have found  no relief to this continuum, the intensity is always there  it just morphs itself into other symptoms and keeps evolving 

 i have tried many many things more than i can count on my  hands and feet it becomes like the search for the Holy Grail for relief, nothing works 

 

My last search has taken me to a functional medicine doctor had all these test carried out and have been diagnosed  as being slightly undermethylated, elevated histamine  causes  mental health problems and pyroluria genetical chemical imbalance related to blood carrying different things for health functions it also cause mental health problems 

 

The doc has had  tailor made nutrients made for  the pyroluria, 2 months i have been take it  can't tell if its made any difference 

the undermethylation remedy i'm waiting for it to arrive 

 

Meanwhile  determination courage i try to muster and trying to believe in a better outcome but with so much doubt 

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mickde1

Hi Altostrata

I just remember, there is 300mg of magnesium in the compounding nutrients that i take sorry for the mix up

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Altostrata
On 12/15/2018 at 6:58 PM, mickde1 said:

I started at  half a mg and  ended at  1mg  after  three weeks  i end up feeling worst  it just explodes in me  it took a long time to settle down again i always get  hopeful  and it ends up  killing all hope and makes depression come to the fore im struggling with it badly right now  

 

That's 0.5mg Lamictal? What effect did 0.5mg have? Why did you go to 1mg? How did 1mg make you feel worse?

 

On 12/13/2018 at 6:01 PM, Altostrata said:

I'm sorry none of those gentle interventions worked for you, mick.

 

It has been nearly 2 years since you last posted, if you had asked earlier, you might have been able to try reinstatement earlier.

 

Even now, reinstating perhaps 0.5mg Prozac might be worth a try. See

 

About reinstating and stabilizing to reduce withdrawal symptoms

 

Liquid Prozac is the best way to take a low dose, this topic explains how Tips for tapering off Prozac (fluoxetine)

 

You'd taper off by miniscule amounts later.

 

Another option might be Lamictal (lamotrigine) to calm post-discontinuation withdrawal symptoms but the drug is quite tricky, you have to be careful not to take too much.

 

On 12/14/2018 at 5:09 PM, mickde1 said:

Is this the only hope i have to try to reinstate prozac ?

 

I don't know if it's your only hope, it's an option. Being that this is an Internet peer support group, we don't work miracles long-distance, so all we can do is suggest things that might work. Nobody can tell exactly how your nervous system might respond to anything. It's all trial and error. Your decision.

 

If you want assurances of a miracle cure, go to a psychiatrist.

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mickde1

Should i reinstate after three years 

 

16 years of  Prozac 80mg & Moclobemide 150 mg  per day,  stopped  Moclobemide, a year and a half latter  lower Prozac dose to 20mg  then changed to Paroxetine then change to a Mirtazapine  then change to Brintellix  then changed to Edronax   all at 10mgs or less  over a period of a year or so ,   stopped all meds completely 14 december 2015 

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ChessieCat

Please respond to Alto's question/s in your topic.

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ChessieCat
24 minutes ago, mickde1 said:

Should i reinstate after three years 

 

16 years of  Prozac 80mg & Moclobemide 150 mg  per day,  stopped  Moclobemide, a year and a half latter  lower Prozac dose to 20mg  then changed to Paroxetine then change to a Mirtazapine  then change to Brintellix  then changed to Edronax   all at 10mgs or less  over a period of a year or so ,   stopped all meds completely 14 december 2015 

 

Please respond to Alto's questions:

 

2 hours ago, Altostrata said:

That's 0.5mg Lamictal? What effect did 0.5mg have? Why did you go to 1mg? How did 1mg make you feel worse?

 

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mickde1

I started with 0.5 mg as i previously said  as after  a week or so i up it by 0.5 still nothing by the three'd week i up it again by 0.5 i then started to become more agitated and restless  symptoms become worse and what sleep i was getting wasn't happening  anymore that was enough for me i stopped it

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mickde1

I started with 0.5 mg as i previously said  as after  a week or so i up it by 0.5 still nothing by the three'd week i up it again by 0.5 i then started to become more agitated and restless  symptoms become worse and what sleep i was getting wasn't happening  anymore that was enough for me i stopped it

 

There was no effect whatsoever until  i reached 1.5 mg for a while then the adverse effect happened all of a sudden that lasted for about 4 to 5 weeks 

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mickde1

I'm between a rock and a hard place 

i'm trying to find out what is the best way  to start my recovery 

Is there anyone that's been in my position that could give me some advice  and some desperately needed hope

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mickde1
On 12/20/2018 at 9:21 PM, mickde1 said:

I'm between a rock and a hard place 

i'm trying to find out what is the best way  to start my recovery 

Is there anyone that's been in my position that could give me some advice  and some desperately needed hope

16 years of  Prozac 80mg & Moclobemide 150 mg  per day,  stopped  Moclobemide, a year and a half latter  lower Prozac dose to 20mg  then changed to Paroxetine then change to a Mirtazapine  then change to Brintellix  then changed to Edronax   all at 10mgs or less  over a period of a year or so ,   stopped all meds completely 14 december 2015 

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Altostrata
On 12/20/2018 at 2:49 AM, mickde1 said:

I started with 0.5 mg as i previously said  as after  a week or so i up it by 0.5 still nothing by the three'd week i up it again by 0.5 i then started to become more agitated and restless  symptoms become worse and what sleep i was getting wasn't happening  anymore that was enough for me i stopped it

 

There was no effect whatsoever until  i reached 1.5 mg for a while then the adverse effect happened all of a sudden that lasted for about 4 to 5 weeks 

 

You erred by dropping Lamictal when you pushed the dosage too high and got an adverse reaction. It might have helped, but it's not the dramatic miracle cure you might have been expecting.

 

You might try 0.5mg Lamictal again, or perhaps 1mg Prozac to see if that helps (but NOT the two together -- make one drug change at a time). Please let us know how you're doing.

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