mickde1: life on hold

[Altostrata]

On 3/13/2019 at 3:55 PM, mickde1 said:

How are you able to measure say 1 mg to dissolve  from a 20mg capsule to last 4 days in the fridge 

 

You dissolve the entire contents of the capsule in a proportionate amount of water (such as 20mL), don't worry about wasting it. Next time, you might want to get a prescription for 5mg or 10mg capsules.

 

Did you take 1mg of a fresh batch last night? Perhaps you would do better with 0.5mg. You can measure the smaller amounts with a 0.5mL or 1mL oral syringe.

 

Please let us know how you're doing.

 

 

[Vonnegutjunky]

Following 

[mickde1]

I have continued with .25  of a ml, symptoms have gone down a notch or 2, somehow  i not sure whether i was going through a big wave or withdrawals from the prozac because it had gone off and wasn't working

 im gone to get a micro scale to weigh  it up and not waste what i have 

[Vonnegutjunky]

Just a bit of advice, that many people here will probably give you. 

 

Your going to get waves, bad ones, that doesn’t mean your dose isn’t working or helping. I made the huge mistake of updosing becuse my reinstatement wasn’t making me feel completely normal. I got akathisia the day after I reinstated. ( to give an example of the hell that is akathisia, Dr. Glenmullen talked about how the Russians, during the Cold War induced akathisia for purposes of torture) i doubled my old dose, so that’s why I got it, I didn’t just updose, I reinstated my full dose and doubled it, I ignored what the mods and alto were telling me to do and listened to my doc. 

 

so you will get waves, and you will feel just as bad as the beginning, but if you are also feeling better, at all, but still feel the need to increase, just please go so slow and cautiously. It cost me 4 years and a career for not listening. 

 

Sending good vibes to you and your recovery. 

[RandyJames]

Hi Mickde1.

 

I happened across your posts and I wanted to say I'm sorry you have been suffering with this.  I'm sorry I can't be of any help but I thought after reading your intro that Happy2Heal's success story might be inspirational to you if you haven't read it already.

I hope you feel better soon.  

 

 

[mickde1]

Thanks Vonnegutjunky and Randy James for the advice guy's and well wishes  Von, you tend think in those ways  you don't know what to believe the brain is mish mash  i've very apprehensive about  upping the dose. 

I couldn't  get a handle on  what was  happening  whether it was a wave or was it  because the liquid prozac that was 7 weeks old  and had gone off and that i was somehow getting more w/d symptoms  

 

The wave has subsided  I don't want to jinx myself  but the physical  symptoms  body aches and pains, stomach nausea have quelled somewhat  i  have just come out of days of early morning high anxiety where i refuse to entertain any thoughts and just have to soothe myself in the here and now as best i can, the days would pan out with the negativity  playing  in the background  and low mood  senario  and upper neck like headaches  and tiredness later in the after afternoon  my mind isn't able to cope with the slightest amount  of stress you have to put everything on hold but  feeling  better 

[mickde1]

Hi all i'm a bit confused about what to do  as you know i have reinstated .25 ml  prozac,  over the last few days  my symptoms have ramped up in bouts , waves of depressions, anxiety and and physical symptoms   i  have a feeling its the reinstatement thats causing it 

but i can't be sure but it feels different  i don't want to be making the wrong decision  

 

 

 

[Altostrata]

What time of day do you take Prozac? What is your symptom pattern after you take it?

 

Are you taking 0.25mg or 0.25mL? If mL, what does that translate to in milligrams of drug?

 

Please keep daily notes of times of day you take your drugs, their dosages, and your symptoms. You can post them in this topic with a simple list format with time of day on the left and notation (symptom, drug and dosage) on the right.

 

[mickde1]

I'm taking it in the morning 7.30 am  i don't get any real effect i don't think until the next early  morning  that usually sets the the way it's going to be eg if i have really bad morning then it doesn't change to much  during the day  if you know what i mean , in amounts i dilute 20mg capsule  with 20 ml of water and take 0.25ml , symptoms are still  happening pretty much in the same way as previous post 

[mickde1]

Acute experience continuum

 

It's been a while since my last post, there's been no real improvement its  been 36  and a half months since my last dose, about 9 days ago i had a freakout experience 

i discovered a termite infestation in my house i didn't know that i would react like this, it got away on me  i could not control  the anxiety,  it's  been continuingly creating  my thoughts and  manifest  or visits  areas

of current concerns that have the slightest  amount stress to perpetuate more anxiety  it tracks and loops  in this way  no matter how much i  exercise, mindfulness  and many other types of relief  self help therapies 

in doesn't help  all the other symptoms have ramped up obvious  depression,  physical  symptoms muscle cramps, pins in the flesh  feel stomach nausea and so on  a revisit of brain zap waking up with  panic attacks 

although my sleep is limitless and very disturbed at best,  the S ideation  crops up from time to time but what ability i have to see things differently i exercise  if somehow and some way  someone has something i can 

use to benefit im greatly appreciative 

 16 years of  Prozac 80mg & Moclobemide 150 mg  per day,  stopped  Moclobemide sometime in 2012 then about a year later lowered Prozac  dose to 20mg  per day, then changed to Paroxetine, then change to a Mirtazapine,  then change to Lexapro,  then changed to Brintellix,  then changed to Edronax  all at 10mgs or less  over a period of about  year,   Edronax tapered 4mg to 2mg over  10 weeks, 2 mg for 8 weeks 1 mg for 10 weeks  stopped all meds completely 14 december 2015  3 months later all HELL broke loose 



16 of  January 2019 started .25ml  Prozac  

 

 

Edited July 1, 2019 by ChessieCat
added topic title

[ChessieCat]

merged 2 intro topics

Please update your drug signature:  Account Settings – Create or Edit a signature

[mickde1]

22 hours ago, mickde1 said:

Acute experience continuum

 

It's been a while since my last post, there's been no real improvement its  been 36  and a half months since my last dose, about 9 days ago i had a freakout experience 

i discovered a termite infestation in my house i didn't know that i would react like this, it got away on me  i could not control  the anxiety,  it's  been continuingly creating  my thoughts and  manifest  or visits  areas

of current concerns that have the slightest  amount stress to perpetuate more anxiety  it tracks and loops  in this way  no matter how much i  exercise, mindfulness  and many other types of relief  self help therapies 

in doesn't help  all the other symptoms have ramped up obvious  depression,  physical  symptoms muscle cramps, pins in the flesh  feel stomach nausea and so on  a revisit of brain zap waking up with  panic attacks 

although my sleep is limitless and very disturbed at best,  the S ideation  crops up from time to time but what ability i have to see things differently i exercise  if somehow and some way  someone has something i can 

use to benefit im greatly appreciative 

 16 years of  Prozac 80mg & Moclobemide 150 mg  per day,  stopped  Moclobemide sometime in 2012 then about a year later lowered Prozac  dose to 20mg  per day, then changed to Paroxetine, then change to a Mirtazapine,  then change to Lexapro,  then changed to Brintellix,  then changed to Edronax  all at 10mgs or less  over a period of about  year,   Edronax tapered 4mg to 2mg over  10 weeks, 2 mg for 8 weeks 1 mg for 10 weeks  stopped all meds completely 14 december 2015  3 months later all HELL broke loose 



16 of  January 2019 started .25ml  Prozac  no change to dose as of 2 july 2019 

 

 

 

[mickde1]

Topic title:  Reinstate to Taper

 

I'm stuck in a very unhealthy way  and wondering about reinstating after 44 months of meds i was on a high dose of SSRI's for a long time and basically went cold turkey 

things are beyond comprehension still, i have been on 0.25mm  prozac as a reinstatement  since mid January this year there's been no effect  i'm very very apprehensive 

about upping the dose but i came across Rhodiola Rosea they same it works like a SSRI and being a natural herb obviously wouldn't have the side effects 

that come with the commercial stuff so if i could make a difference to my health with tapering off with this herb could it  work  has anyone had experience it this course

16 years of  Prozac 80mg & Moclobemide 150 mg  per day,  stopped  Moclobemide sometime in 2012 then about a year later lowered Prozac  dose to 20mg  per day, then changed to Paroxetine, then change to a Mirtazapine,  then change to Lexapro,  then changed to Brintellix,  then changed to Edronax  all at 10mgs or less  over a period of about  year,   Edronax tapered 4mg to 2mg over  10 weeks, 2 mg for 8 weeks 1 mg for 10 weeks  stopped all meds completely 14 december 2015  3 months later all HELL broke loose 

16 of  January 2019 started .25ml  Prozac and still current 

 

 

Edited August 10, 2019 by ChessieCat
added topic title

[mickde1]

I'm not sure my post are going through or may be there's no one  out there that has anything to say  has anyone had any experience or has heard of anyone that has had any experience 

 

with reinstating with a low does of a natural herb the one i had in mind is Rhodiola Rosea  i'm 44 months of virtual cold turkey  and in a very bad state 

[ChessieCat]

I've moved your post from another member's topic (UnfoldingSky's)

 

Here's SA's to topic:  rhodiola-rosea-study-suggests-benefit-on-stress-related-fatigue-and-waking-cortisol

 

9 minutes ago, mickde1 said:

i'm 44 months of virtual cold turkey  and in a very bad state 

 

Are you still on Prozac?

 

Drug signature:  18 Jan 2019 reinstated Prozac .25mg  currently  2 july 2019 prozac  .25 mg 

[mickde1]

No i'm not, i stopped taking  small reinstatement of prozac  0.25 of a mg after 8 months and just started a small amount  about 12 mg of R Rosea  about 35 days ago same time i stopped the prozac 

just looking to get some relief as we all are there's been some change but the waves keep happening my mind is in a different place maybe i have more tolerance 

but the mornings physical  symptoms stomach sickness  and muscular  fibromyalgia  pain have ramped up a bit i think its too early to evaluate  overall  i'm thinking of 

a introducing  very slow small amounts of  Ashwagandha and  Bacopa Monnieri  if  and when i can find stable plane with R Rosea

 

 16 years of  Prozac 80mg & Moclobemide 150 mg  per day,  stopped  Moclobemide sometime in 2012 then about a year later lowered Prozac  dose to 20mg  per day, then changed to Paroxetine, then change to a Mirtazapine,  then change to Lexapro,  then changed to Brintellix,  then changed to Edronax  all at 10mgs or less  over a period of about  year,   Edronax tapered 4mg to 2mg over  10 weeks, 2 mg for 8 weeks 1 mg for 10 weeks  stopped all meds completely 14 december 2015  3 months later all HELL broke loose 

16 of  January 2019 started .25ml  Prozac  then  ceased  taking 5 of September 

 

[ChessieCat]

I've merged the topic you created about bacopa with the existing topic.  Here:  bacopa-or-water-hyssop-supplement

 

Posts in the existing topic which you may not have seen:

 

On 9/4/2016 at 4:21 AM, scallywag said:

 

Terry, I did a bit of searching about Bacopa also known as Water Hyssop.  It's a neuroactive plant substance. Personally I wouldn't take it while dealing with symptoms of psych drug withdrawal.

 

 

On 9/28/2016 at 5:35 AM, Altostrata said:

 

Please note that nootropics are very popular among people who either like to experiment with gray-market drugs. These are not people whose nervous systems have become sensitized to drugs.

 

If your nervous system has been sensitized by psychiatric drug withdrawal or adverse effects, you will want to be very, very careful with anything that's called a nootropic.

 

 

The only supplements which SA recommends are Magnesium  and Omega-3 Fish Oil.

 

It is best to only make one change at a time (ie don't make a dose change at the some time as trying a new supplement, and only try one supplement at a time) and when trying anything new start by taking a small dose first.

 

See:

 

the-rule-of-3kis-keep-it-simple-keep-it-slow-keep-it-stable

 

 

Edited July 9, 2020 by ChessieCat

[ChessieCat]

On 10/7/2019 at 1:04 PM, mickde1 said:

i'm thinking of 

a introducing  very slow small amounts of  Ashwagandha and  Bacopa Monnieri  if  and when i can find stable plane with R Rosea

 

There are many existing topics on SA.  I like to use a search engine and add site: survivingantidepressant.org to my search term.

 

rhodiola-rosea

 

ashwagandha-herb-for-anxiety-stress-and-toxic-overload

 

 

 

[mickde1]

9 hours ago, manymoretodays said:

Thank you savinggrace, @savinggracefor sharing your experience.

And @mickde1

merged recent vaccine posts to covid19 topic.

Thanks Pro i'm very cautious i  still can't enjoy  one glass of red wine after 62 months clean my brain is that sensitive any surprise stress throws me into a wave 

[manymoretodays]

Hi mickde1,

I split the last post from you from the Covid19 topic back here.

And now, notice that you haven't done an update for quite awhile. 

How are you doing?

13 hours ago, mickde1 said:

Thanks Pro i'm very cautious i  still can't enjoy  one glass of red wine after 62 months clean my brain is that sensitive any surprise stress throws me into a wave 

And then, for some, that does seem to be the case.  Increased sensitivity to alcohol is common in WD.

Me, I'm a "tea-totaler"  or non-drinker now completely, which I think has benefited my recovery and healing.

We each have to find our own paths though, going forward, and no judgement.

 

Here's our topic on:  Alcohol and beer

And give us an update, right here.  Thank you.  Are you still on the .25 mg of Prozac now, as your signature suggests?

And you can update your signature here:  AccountsSettings/signature if there are any changes to it.  Just click on the underlined link to go to it, and then don't forget to hit Save when you are done.

 

And best,

L, P, H, and G,

mmt

[mickde1]

On 2/14/2021 at 7:58 AM, manymoretodays said:

Hi mickde1,

I split the last post from you from the Covid19 topic back here.

And now, notice that you haven't done an update for quite awhile. 

How are you doing?

And then, for some, that does seem to be the case.  Increased sensitivity to alcohol is common in WD.

Me, I'm a "tea-totaler"  or non-drinker now completely, which I think has benefited my recovery and healing.

We each have to find our own paths though, going forward, and no judgement.

 

Here's our topic on:  Alcohol and beer

And give us an update, right here.  Thank you.  Are you still on the .25 mg of Prozac now, as your signature suggests?

And you can update your signature here:  AccountsSettings/signature if there are any changes to it.  Just click on the underlined link to go to it, and then don't forget to hit Save when you are done.

 

And best,

L, P, H, and G,

mmt

 I mean i have 2 or 3 glass of wine a year, me ; currently without writing a debilitating book about it i find others on this site fair much better than i do over time this a very long journey the  mental and physical symptoms rage relentlessly  and they don't lessen in intensity in some aspect more intense irrespective to doing multiple self help therapies hours on end  the best nutrition and physical exercise my improve over 62 months could be measured in increments very miniscule i wonder if anyone else is in the same boat 

[mickde1]

Hi Manymoretoday  Update as follows I've been medication free for 65 months and a half months as posted of May 30th 2021 , stopped   med's December 14th 2015,  history  20 years on  Prozac 80mg & Moclobemide 150 mg  per day,  stopped  Moclobemide sometime in 2012 then about a year later lowered Prozac  dose to 20mg  per day, then changed to Paroxetine, then change to a Mirtazapine,  then change to Lexapro,  then changed to Brintellix,  then changed to Edronax  all at 10mgs or less  over a period of about  year,   Edronax tapered 4mg to 2mg over  10 weeks, 2 mg for 8 weeks 1 mg for 10 weeks  stopped all meds completely 14 December 2015  3 months later all HELL broke loose 

18 Jan 2019 reinstated Prozac  .25 mg then ceased 8/8/2019

 

[arbor]

Hi @mickde1--How are you doing?

Sending you best wishes,

Arbor

[mickde1]

Hi arbor thanks for checking in. Hope your doing well. Well how am i doing , after 80.5 months or  6 .8 years cold turkey  many things have changed or evolved / morphed into new types of  symptoms,

depression low threshold to stress with every day live which  of course triggers other symptoms has been the norm for some time  say no more 

 

Sleep has improved physically  intestinal system, cramps, muscle spasm, twitches and itches mostly improved 

 

A big concern is fatigued or brain damage im still trying to figure it out it concerns me,  thinking wise i'm in a smoke screen it has  effected my  perception, conceptualising and  memory, my inner self is lost i  struggle with this disposition  but i keep striving with a plethora of self help regimes 

 

Lately i've been playing with the thought of trying a low does of Rhodiola a herb  to spark something to climb out of this long clouded over dull existence 

 

God bless have a good day 

 

 

 

[arbor]

Dear @mickde1--Thanks so much for your update.  You've been through so much.  Our w/d symptoms are so unbelievably difficult.

On 8/29/2022 at 7:42 PM, mickde1 said:

Sleep has improved physically  intestinal system, cramps, muscle spasm, twitches and itches mostly improved 

 

I celebrate these improvements.

On 8/29/2022 at 7:42 PM, mickde1 said:

A big concern is fatigued or brain damage im still trying to figure it out it concerns me,  thinking wise i'm in a smoke screen it has  effected my  perception, conceptualising and  memory, my inner self is lost i  struggle with this disposition 

Yes, I can understand your concerns.  I share them as well.

 

On 8/29/2022 at 7:42 PM, mickde1 said:

but i keep striving with a plethora of self help regimes 

I admire you for having the strength and will to apply these.  Personally, I think they help, though it may be slow.

 

Since your last use of Prozac ended 8/8/20, I would guess, based on my experience as well as the average recovery times here, that it's not unusual that you would still be experiencing your symptoms.  It seems to me likely that this will definitely all improve with time.  (So glad you're sleeping.)

On 8/29/2022 at 7:42 PM, mickde1 said:

Lately i've been playing with the thought of trying a low does of Rhodiola a herb  to spark something to climb out of this long clouded over dull existence 

I hope you'll report back on how this goes for you.  Have you checked the site to see if others have tried it?  I know the feeling of "long clouded over dull existence".  Thinking of you,

Arbor

[arbor]

Wondering how you're doing @mickde1

Arbor 💜

[mickde1]

Hi Arbor hope your doing well and getting back to healthier existence 

for me the roller-coaster ride continues with  new twist and turns but with a slow linear improvement but along way to go I tried some concentrate plankton stuff with acclaimed cognitive health at 1/3  the dose i kept lowering it had to give it miss after 3 weeks become to uncomfortable my psychologist friend tried it he met the same fate As usual the nights and  mornings are the worst digestive system bone joints pain skin itch and stings along within my mind I still have a  core fatigue/ worry I get  some bout of depression when the waves arrive the last wave I layed in bed in not able to sleep I had an episode where I had this green light in my minds eye I opened up my eyes it was still there not an hallucination just a green light I wasn't alarmed it went away after 5 to 10 seconds then I went into a very vivid dream that normally when they happen turn into a nightmare and a panic attack but this time like the last I retaliated in the dream and woke up sitting up fight the back and dominating the situation  but generally  I manage with all the self help therapies that I have managed to create and mindset it some instances I can negate some of the symptoms completely it takes months to perfect or keep improving on i got a friend trying some Glynac it's 2 amino acids it's been used for cognitive decline I still haven't researched thoroughly but has many positive qualities targeted for senior people your always looking for some help along way if it doesn't make your condition more unstable im almost 7 years and 8 months ct

 

cheers brother I written this quickly hope it makes sence remember never loose hope and keep looking for a better way in everway 

[arbor]

Hi @mickde1  Thank you for getting back with your story.  It means a lot to me to know what's happening for you and how you're coping.  

On 8/6/2023 at 1:37 AM, mickde1 said:

 

for me the roller-coaster ride continues with  new twist and turns but with a slow linear improvement but along way to go

Thank heavens the brain has plasticity--and certainly it is slow.  Acceptance of the damage has been hard for me.  I appreciate your dedication to working with the issues we have--allowing the improvement to evolve.  Your dream is certainly affirmative!

 

On 8/6/2023 at 1:37 AM, mickde1 said:

remember never loose hope and keep looking for a better way in everway 

Thank you mickde1 !

Arbor

[mickde1]

Hi Arbor It's not what you think watch it through  i found interesting you can manifest and channel your mind in ways you may have forgotten