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Buccaneers47: Antipsychotic medication advice


Buccaneers47

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Hi all. I am new here, and I'm unsure if posting in this forum is the correct one.
I am in need of assistance and answers.

 

I was diagnosed with PPOCD, and recently started having Harm OCD. I went to a partial hospitalization program, where they started me on antipsychotics. Low dose. They first tried ambilify where I was on it for 3 days but had awful side effects, so they switched me to risperidol .5. I was on that for about a week and a half before issues started. Muscle tightness, aggregation ect. They dropped the dose back down. I still had issues. They switched me to Serequil and put me on Prozac the same time. I was only on 25 mg of Serequil, and 10 mg of Prozac. I ended up hospitalized because the thoughts of harming my son intensified. They then told me I had psychosis. The only issue with that is I do not hear voices or have hallucinations. I just had impulsivity. I stopped Prozac within 3 days, but continued on Serequil. It didn't help me at all and instead I have had complete lack of emotion, lack of empathy, no motivation, issues with memory. They put me on Zyprexa 5mg for about 4 days and then switched me back to Serequil.

Can antipsychotics cause these issues with HI? Even if I have tried multiple different ones? Or is switching all of these meds so quickly causing me this issue?

 

Am I able to taper more quickly because I have not been on them for that long?

 

I just feel completely emotionally numb, and not much anxiety at all. I would rather feel anxiety and hell then feel completely emotionally detached. My husband HATES this and wants me off.

Edited by scallywag
tags, paragraph spacing added previously

10/28: khlonopin .50 mg (taken very sparingly)

11/25-11/27:Ambilify 1mg

11/27-11/29: Risperidal .5 mg

11/29-12/2: Risperidal 1mg

12/2-12/1:Riperidal .5 mg

12/1-12/23: Seroquil 25mg

12/1-12/5: Prozac 10mg

12/23-1/3: Zyprexa 5mg

1/3- :Seroquil 50mg

1/4: Xanax .50mg

Currently on 37.5 mg Seroquil, Xanax .5 mg used as needed typically 4

days a week.

Link to comment

Okay hi! I am new here and I have quite a perdicament and hoping for some insight. It may take a little bit of time for me to explain so I hope you will follow along and have some good advice for me. Im going to be very open and honest so please bare with me.

 

I'm 25 years old, and I am the mom to a 4 year old and a wife as well. I have been a stay at home mom.

 

Let's back track. So after I had my son, I developed relationship OCD. They diagnosed me with what they call 'Pure O' OCD. A week after I stopped breastfeeding my son, I had severe anxiety, panic attacks and the OCD exacerbated. It has been 2 years now that I have been suffering. We were living with my mom so my comfort zone kept me going. We eventually 4 months ago bought a house and ever since I have been dealing with Harm OCD thoughts towards my son. It freaked me out so bad that I couldn't be alone with my son. I questioned myself because he was totally my entire world. My existence revolved around him. I mean, I would have given my entire life to make sure that he had the most amazing life. I was obsessed. So when I started having thoughts of harming him, I freaked out. Completely. Freaking out that if I had OCD that my son would have it, that I was a (for the lack of a better term) sh*tty mom. I couldn't be alone with him in fear I would snap. I obsessed about it all the time. Lived in constant fear. So on top of being out of my comfort zone, having to cut my mom out of my life, thinking that all the time I was totally out of my mind with anxiety.

 

I ended up going to a partial hospitalization program for the OCD. That is where it has gone downhill ever since. I'm unsure if it's the meds or me, but I'm hoping for some insight because I would like to be off medication if it truly is that.

 

So during my partial hospitalization they told me they wanted me to start with an antipsychotic because it was supposed to help. I should have told them to screw off then but I was at my wits end and needed help. I started with Ambilify at a very low dose. The starting dose. I believe it was 5mg. Or .5. I was on it for 3 days and the side effects were awful. I felt like I couldn't sit still, muscle tightness, severe irritability. They decided to change it to .5 respirdol. I had some side effects but nothing awful so they upped the dose to 1mg. From there the irritability was awful, the muscle tightness, sore nipples. They put it back down. I still felt aggressive for one week. They changed it to 25mg of Seroquil and added Prozac. From about 2 days on it, I started getting urges to harm my son. It was urges. I would get severely irritated over nothing. Seriously nothing at all. I told the psychiatrist and they ended up putting me in the hospital saying it was borderline psychosis. The team at the psychatic hospital told me that they didn't believe it was, but diagnosed me with postpartum psychosis.

 

They stopped the Prozac but continued the Serequil. I ended up doubling the dose to 50mg. During all of this, I felt emotionally totally numb. I don't feel any love toward anyone. I have no motivation. No will to live. I started seeing a psychologist 3 times a week and he suggested I go to a psychiatrist that he works with. That psychiatrist believed that I have ADHD. I decided not to take those meds, but he changed my antipsychotic once again to Zyprexa. Then 3 days ago, I was told to switch back to Seroquil 50 mg.

 

I have homicidal ideation. I get mad at everyone for things that before all of this, I would NEVER get mad at. I have NO patience.

 

I feel like I don't even know my son. Or myself. When I look at my son, I feel like I don't have a connection. When he gets hurt, I don't care. When he wants food I don't want to get up to get it. I'm currently under 24 hour watch by my family just to be cautious, but NONE of this started until I was put and taken of so many different medications.

 

I need to know if this can be caused by medication or illness itself. My husband wants me to come off the medications, and I do too.

Anyone have insight? I want to FEEL again.

Edited by ChessieCat
added spacing

10/28: khlonopin .50 mg (taken very sparingly)

11/25-11/27:Ambilify 1mg

11/27-11/29: Risperidal .5 mg

11/29-12/2: Risperidal 1mg

12/2-12/1:Riperidal .5 mg

12/1-12/23: Seroquil 25mg

12/1-12/5: Prozac 10mg

12/23-1/3: Zyprexa 5mg

1/3- :Seroquil 50mg

1/4: Xanax .50mg

Currently on 37.5 mg Seroquil, Xanax .5 mg used as needed typically 4

days a week.

Link to comment

Also, I wanted to add that I have been on meds for 6 weeks. I haven't felt any anxiety since. That's not the goal here. I'll gladly feel anxiety again if I could just feel love and have my patience back! If I can taper, can I do it quicker because I haven't been on them for long?

10/28: khlonopin .50 mg (taken very sparingly)

11/25-11/27:Ambilify 1mg

11/27-11/29: Risperidal .5 mg

11/29-12/2: Risperidal 1mg

12/2-12/1:Riperidal .5 mg

12/1-12/23: Seroquil 25mg

12/1-12/5: Prozac 10mg

12/23-1/3: Zyprexa 5mg

1/3- :Seroquil 50mg

1/4: Xanax .50mg

Currently on 37.5 mg Seroquil, Xanax .5 mg used as needed typically 4

days a week.

Link to comment

I posted a little bit earlier, hoping that someone could give me advice, but none so far!

 

I was on Seroquil for 2 weeks. It helped tremendously, but the psychiatrist switched me to Zyprexa. I was on Zyprexa for about 4 days tops (not 100% sure) but then was switched back to Seroquil. Now it doesn't help with sleep at all. Is this common or just my body used to it?

10/28: khlonopin .50 mg (taken very sparingly)

11/25-11/27:Ambilify 1mg

11/27-11/29: Risperidal .5 mg

11/29-12/2: Risperidal 1mg

12/2-12/1:Riperidal .5 mg

12/1-12/23: Seroquil 25mg

12/1-12/5: Prozac 10mg

12/23-1/3: Zyprexa 5mg

1/3- :Seroquil 50mg

1/4: Xanax .50mg

Currently on 37.5 mg Seroquil, Xanax .5 mg used as needed typically 4

days a week.

Link to comment
  • Moderator

Hi Buccaneers47-- Welcome to SA.  Sorry it's taken so long for someone to get back to you.  I also very sorry to hear about what the short exposure to these drugs has been doing to you.  It's wonderful that you have the support there to help you through these tough times.  First off let me reassure you that for the most part it's the drug and not you.  I'm far from an expert on OCD so I can't really comment on that.  From my experience with anger issues I can deeply empathize with you on the hate ideation.  The drugs are doing you no favors in trying to deal with these issues.  It looks like you've been on and off of a number of them in a very short time, if you would give us a listing of them in a signature block it will really help us figure out how best to approach getting you off of them.

 

Please put your withdrawal history in your signature

 

 

All of these drugs work by suppressing our emotions. They aren't "happy pills", they don't dis-spell anxiety or lessen panic.  All they do is make us feel nothing and not care about it.  It's a very frustrating place to be, because we know the emotions and feelings are there we just can't access them.  That frustration can compound other things we are dealing with too, such as OCD and relocation issues and make them seem much worse.  They also block one major source of pleasure/strength, our love for our families.  As we taper off of the drugs their influence decreases and our feelings and emotions slowly return.

 

If you've been reading around the site you will get the impression that the tapering process is a very long and drawn out affair.  For those of us who have been on the drugs for a long time it is.  Luckily you've only been on them a matter of a few weeks so you should be able to go much faster.  This is where the information in your signature will be helpful for us, to determine just how fast you could safely go.

 

Again, welcome to the group.

20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013.

Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks.  The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better.

Final Dose 0.016mg.     Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017

 

"It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general."  Stephen Hawking

Link to comment

Welcome Buccaneers

First things first Brass just bet me to post so i wont mention the drug sig requirement.

 

Just out of interest do you have any ideas as to the reason for the ocd when you gave birth do you think it was a part of PND or did you take any illegal drugs or legal drugs at this time also.

Can you info someone ignorant like me what the PP means in the PPOCD.

 

Its always in your interest to research for yourself any chemical the doctors give you before swallowing it.

 

nz11

Thought for the day: Lets stand up, and let’s speak out , together. G Olsen

We have until the 14th. Feb 2018. 

URGENT REQUEST Please consider submitting  for the petition on Prescribed Drug Dependence and Withdrawal currently awaiting its third consideration at the Scottish Parliament. You don't even have to be from Scotland. By clicking on the link below you can read some of the previous submissions but be warned many of them are quite harrowing.

http://www.parliament.scot/GettingInvolved/Petitions/PE01651   

Please tell them about your problems taking and withdrawing from antidepressants and/or benzos.

Send by email to petitions@parliament.scot and quote PE01651 in the subject heading. Keep to a maximum of 3 sides of A4 and you can't name for legal reasons any doctor you have consulted. Tell them if you wish to remain anonymous. We need the numbers to help convince the committee members we are not isolated cases. You have until mid February. Thank you

Recovering paxil addict

None of the published articles shed light on what ssri's ... actually do or what their hazards might be. Healy 2013. 

This is so true, with anything you get on these drugs, dependance, tapering, withdrawal symptoms, side effects, just silent. And if there is something mentioned then their is a serious disconnect between what is said and reality! 

  "Every time I read of a multi-person shooting, I always presume that person had just started a SSRI or had just stopped."  Dr Mosher. Me too! 

Over two decades later, the number of antidepressant prescriptions a year is slightly more than the number of people in the Western world. Most (nine out of 10) prescriptions are for patients who faced difficulties on stopping, equating to about a tenth of the population. These patients are often advised to continue treatment because their difficulties indicate they need ongoing treatment, just as a person with diabetes needs insulin. Healy 2015

I believe the ssri era will soon stand as one of the most shameful in the history of medicine. Healy 2015

Let people help people ... in a natural, kind, non-addictive (and non-big pharma) way. J Broadley 2017

 

 

Link to comment

Thank you both for the response. I have added a signiture with the list of medications I have been on. I was taking 2 25mg tablets = 50mg) but halved on of the pills and have been at that for the past 2 nights. If there wasn't a chance of rebound psychosis I would probably stop them cold turkey.

 

PPOCD is postpartum OCD. For some reason when I gave birth a bunch of chemicals screwed up and caused me to have OCD. I was no on any drugs. You used to have to basically give me a Xanax to even take a Xanax. I was at my wits end when they decided to give me antipsychotics (what a good drug to start out on right) and ever since then I have been on a slippery slope. It's done a really good job of hiding my emotions. They tell me that it was a psychotic break; but I do not hear things, see things. I may have a little delusional thinking but I have insight on that. Can switching all of these medications cause homicidal ideation? Before going onto these meds, I had Harm OCD. I had thoughts of harming my son, and it would send me into sheer panic immediately. Now I have thoughts towards other people for absolutely no reason. For example, my sister just got out of a 6 year relationship and has been living with me, and she has a new boyfriend. It makes me furious that she is lying to her ex.

 

I lack emotion, I lack love. I lack interest, motivation. I genuinely do not know who I am. I can't even remember who I was before these medications. Half of me insists that I should go on more meds, and the other half insists that the reason I am here is BECAUSE of the meds.

10/28: khlonopin .50 mg (taken very sparingly)

11/25-11/27:Ambilify 1mg

11/27-11/29: Risperidal .5 mg

11/29-12/2: Risperidal 1mg

12/2-12/1:Riperidal .5 mg

12/1-12/23: Seroquil 25mg

12/1-12/5: Prozac 10mg

12/23-1/3: Zyprexa 5mg

1/3- :Seroquil 50mg

1/4: Xanax .50mg

Currently on 37.5 mg Seroquil, Xanax .5 mg used as needed typically 4

days a week.

Link to comment

Sorry PPOCD is Postpartum OCD

10/28: khlonopin .50 mg (taken very sparingly)

11/25-11/27:Ambilify 1mg

11/27-11/29: Risperidal .5 mg

11/29-12/2: Risperidal 1mg

12/2-12/1:Riperidal .5 mg

12/1-12/23: Seroquil 25mg

12/1-12/5: Prozac 10mg

12/23-1/3: Zyprexa 5mg

1/3- :Seroquil 50mg

1/4: Xanax .50mg

Currently on 37.5 mg Seroquil, Xanax .5 mg used as needed typically 4

days a week.

Link to comment

I forgot to also add that I have been prescribed 1 bottle of Khlonopin .5 mg since 10/28, but I do not take them every day. I recently was prescribed Xanax .5mg but take that maybe 3-4 days a week once a day. I'm not sure if that would play into it.

10/28: khlonopin .50 mg (taken very sparingly)

11/25-11/27:Ambilify 1mg

11/27-11/29: Risperidal .5 mg

11/29-12/2: Risperidal 1mg

12/2-12/1:Riperidal .5 mg

12/1-12/23: Seroquil 25mg

12/1-12/5: Prozac 10mg

12/23-1/3: Zyprexa 5mg

1/3- :Seroquil 50mg

1/4: Xanax .50mg

Currently on 37.5 mg Seroquil, Xanax .5 mg used as needed typically 4

days a week.

Link to comment

Not together. I meant I ran out of the bottle of Khlonopin about 1 week ago, and was given Xanax there after.

10/28: khlonopin .50 mg (taken very sparingly)

11/25-11/27:Ambilify 1mg

11/27-11/29: Risperidal .5 mg

11/29-12/2: Risperidal 1mg

12/2-12/1:Riperidal .5 mg

12/1-12/23: Seroquil 25mg

12/1-12/5: Prozac 10mg

12/23-1/3: Zyprexa 5mg

1/3- :Seroquil 50mg

1/4: Xanax .50mg

Currently on 37.5 mg Seroquil, Xanax .5 mg used as needed typically 4

days a week.

Link to comment

I also meant to add. I have akathisia. I have had it ever since starting all of the antipsychotics!

This has to be adding to the problem as I have never ever dealt with it before starting the meds.

10/28: khlonopin .50 mg (taken very sparingly)

11/25-11/27:Ambilify 1mg

11/27-11/29: Risperidal .5 mg

11/29-12/2: Risperidal 1mg

12/2-12/1:Riperidal .5 mg

12/1-12/23: Seroquil 25mg

12/1-12/5: Prozac 10mg

12/23-1/3: Zyprexa 5mg

1/3- :Seroquil 50mg

1/4: Xanax .50mg

Currently on 37.5 mg Seroquil, Xanax .5 mg used as needed typically 4

days a week.

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Buccaneers -- Welcome to Surviving Antidepressants (SA) from me too.

 

The use of Klonopin and Xanax are almost certainly at play in your symptoms.

 

Would you please add Klonopin & Xanax, the dates you started taking them, and how often you take them to your signature?

 

Also while you're editing, please indicate what medications you are currently taking and at what doses.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.
1997-1999 Effexor; 2002-2005 Effexor XR 37.5 mg linear taper, dropping same #beads/week with bad results

Cymbalta 60 mg 2012 - 2015; 2016: 20 mg to 7 mg exact doses and dates in this post; 2017: 6.3 mg to  0.0 mg  Aug. 12; details here


scallywag's Introduction
Online spreadsheet for dose taper calculations and nz11's THE WORKS spreadsheet

Link to comment

I added all medications and doses! Hope you guys can help!

10/28: khlonopin .50 mg (taken very sparingly)

11/25-11/27:Ambilify 1mg

11/27-11/29: Risperidal .5 mg

11/29-12/2: Risperidal 1mg

12/2-12/1:Riperidal .5 mg

12/1-12/23: Seroquil 25mg

12/1-12/5: Prozac 10mg

12/23-1/3: Zyprexa 5mg

1/3- :Seroquil 50mg

1/4: Xanax .50mg

Currently on 37.5 mg Seroquil, Xanax .5 mg used as needed typically 4

days a week.

Link to comment
  • Moderator

Thanks for adding and updating your signature, that information is very helpful.

 

" Can switching all of these medications cause homicidal ideation? Before going onto these meds, I had Harm OCD. I had thoughts of harming my son, and it would send me into sheer panic immediately. Now I have thoughts towards other people for absolutely no reason"

 

Something else these drug do is to block our self censoring and impulse control.  So if you were already having harm thoughts, they would become more difficult to control.  Those thoughts could then trigger an Emotional Spiral causing them to become very prominent  in your current thinking.  Emotional Spirals can play a big part in dealing with these drugs learning to control them is very important.

 

Dealing With Emotional Spirals

 

"I was taking 2 25mg tablets = 50mg) but halved on of the pills and have been at that for the past 2 nights."

 

So are you currently taking 50mg or 37.5mg?

 

Please try to use the Xanax as little as possible.  It is a very powerful drug and very addicting.  Once, maybe twice a week shouldn't be a problem but more than that can lead to dependency in just a few weeks and you don't want to have to deal with that on top of everything else.

20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013.

Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks.  The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better.

Final Dose 0.016mg.     Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017

 

"It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general."  Stephen Hawking

Link to comment

Yes, I am currently at 37.5mg of Seroquil. I just want off these medications. What is the fastest yet quickest way to get off?

 

I will definitely try to use Xanax way less, I hate taking it. With the akathisia, it helps and that is why I was taking the Xanax to help.

10/28: khlonopin .50 mg (taken very sparingly)

11/25-11/27:Ambilify 1mg

11/27-11/29: Risperidal .5 mg

11/29-12/2: Risperidal 1mg

12/2-12/1:Riperidal .5 mg

12/1-12/23: Seroquil 25mg

12/1-12/5: Prozac 10mg

12/23-1/3: Zyprexa 5mg

1/3- :Seroquil 50mg

1/4: Xanax .50mg

Currently on 37.5 mg Seroquil, Xanax .5 mg used as needed typically 4

days a week.

Link to comment

Best way* I'm sorry. I can't sit still so I have trouble even typing.

10/28: khlonopin .50 mg (taken very sparingly)

11/25-11/27:Ambilify 1mg

11/27-11/29: Risperidal .5 mg

11/29-12/2: Risperidal 1mg

12/2-12/1:Riperidal .5 mg

12/1-12/23: Seroquil 25mg

12/1-12/5: Prozac 10mg

12/23-1/3: Zyprexa 5mg

1/3- :Seroquil 50mg

1/4: Xanax .50mg

Currently on 37.5 mg Seroquil, Xanax .5 mg used as needed typically 4

days a week.

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

When considering methods to get off the medications, please include "safety" and "minimal risk of withdrawal symptoms" as criteria. 
 
Tapering rapidly, even one drug at a time, increases the risk of severe withdrawal symptoms.  The list in the first post at this link may provide some sense of what you want to prevent from occurring:
Important topics about symptoms.
Here's a post about Symptoms of autonomic nervous system dysfunction.
 
For more about what happens in your CNS (central nervous system) both in the presence of these medications and as a result of dose changes, please have a look at discussions/information at these links:
One theory of anti-depressant withdrawal syndrome
How your brain responds to psychiatric drugs - aka "Brain remodeling"
Youtube video, 4 minutes: Healing from antidepressants  

On this site, we encourage people to prioritize a safe landing from tapering and therefore recommend tapering only one drug at a time by no more than 10% per month. Some links with more information about this approach:
Before you begin tapering -- what you need to know
Why taper by 10% of my dosage?
Taking multiple drugs? Which to taper first.

 

Lots for you to read and review.  If you have questions, please post them here in your introduction topic.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.
1997-1999 Effexor; 2002-2005 Effexor XR 37.5 mg linear taper, dropping same #beads/week with bad results

Cymbalta 60 mg 2012 - 2015; 2016: 20 mg to 7 mg exact doses and dates in this post; 2017: 6.3 mg to  0.0 mg  Aug. 12; details here


scallywag's Introduction
Online spreadsheet for dose taper calculations and nz11's THE WORKS spreadsheet

Link to comment

Antipsychotics are perhaps even worse than any antidepressant ever created. Now that is saying A LOT. I tried just about every drug on market and APs were easily the worst. Who would want to chance the risk of having tardive for the rest of one's life??

2005: Began switching from one ssri to the next. Very little tapering time was instructed by my psychiatrist. Tried just about every drug on the market. Some two or three times. Nothing reallly helped my moderate depression and anxiety. They only made things worse most of the time!!

2014: Began experiencing severe symptoms while still taking Zoloft, oddly enough. Was forced to quit drugs altogether.

2017: A new year begins having experienced substantial improvement. Still not sure if my symptoms were severe protracted withdrawal or a severe reaction to a med, or possibly a combination of each.

Link to comment

Hi Buccaneers 47,

 

I my self had anxiety borderline OCD and I can tell you that after I took Zoloft my OCD was so much worse. It totally screwed up my mind. Like you, a low dose of Seroquel was added to the mix as well as Mitrazapine. It did not help me and my doctor advised me to quit Seroquel cold turkey. It is possible that you are having WDS after being switched from one medication to another.

I had a bad reaction to Zoloft and Mirtazapine was not doing much for me.I was still experiencing bad WDS for a long time. The good news is that you do recover and you do get better. The crazy thoughts that you are experiencing is not you, but the meds. You have to keep in mind, how you were before meds and how you are now, after the meds. It is very common to question your self at the beginning of this journey, trying to work out, which is the medication and which is you.

I too felt emotional numbness. It slowly comes back. You will get better. Don't loose hope. Best wishes, Hopefull.

DRUG HISTORY:

 

November 2013- Zoloft, ( Bad reaction).

January 2014 - March 2014 Seroquel.( Quit Cold Turkey).

January2014- Mirtazapine, I was taking 15mg at one stage, reduced to 7.5mg, Pgad reactions to Mirtazapine. Doctor kept increasing it to 37.5mg, until July 2014. No improvement, experiencing panic attacks, on 37.5 mg. I had enough by October 2014. Began tapering.

October 2014- Started tapering Mirtazapine from 37.5mg.

September 2015- Down to 4mg of Mirtazapine. Crashed.

September 16th- Up dosed to 5mg. Held this dose for almost 5 months. Stabilised.

February 2016- Began tapering again. From 5mg to 4.5mg of Mirtazapine. (Rocking the boat, again)! Lol. :(

Link to comment

Thank you all for your input.

I definitely didn't start having this impulsiveness, urges to self harm, complete emotional withdrawal from my son, feeling like I don't know who I am, aggressiveness until I started these meds.

There is a good part of me that wonders if this is truly psychosis that they haven't been able to treat or if this is from the medication. The only thing that makes me feel completely like I need off of these meds is that I was not like this until I started/stopped all of these medications. The OCD is not really there anymore. I just have urges to harm my son and sometimes people around me.

I dont want to completely stop meds and not get better, but I also want to make sure that the meds are what is causing it. I do know meds can truly help in some situations.

I have two options: go up on medication and start an antidepressant, or completely come off the medication all together.

This is not like I'm just dealing with side effects, but I am dealing with homicidal thoughts, so I want to tread very carefully. I will list the symptoms I am having in hopes that someone may be able to tell me if it could be the mental illness or symptoms of meds/WD.

 

 

Since starting the meds I have had that I didn't have before:

•complete lack of emotion except sometimes I cry because I do not feel love.

•akathisia when stressed and sometimes just whenever

•feeling like I do not know my surroundings. The people around me, or who I am.

•fear constantly. Not wanting to be by myself in fear that I will harm someone or myself

•strong urges to self harm

•homicidal ideation

•issues with sleep

•extreme irritability and aggressiveness

•shakiness

•suicidal thinking

•impulsivity

•when I even look at my son I get annoyed and angry

 

 

I want to be really sure before I just stop medications as this is life or death. I want to be clear that I do know that medications are terrible, and thrown around Willy nilly (as you can tell by my medication past) but I also want to be stable enough to work through CBT. If the meds are causing this, I want the hell off of them. If they aren't, maybe upping meds is best. This is a very touch and go situation. I plan to sit down with my husband and mom today to go over how I am feeling and what the plan should be from here on out. I welcome ALL advice and input because it will help grately in making a decision.

10/28: khlonopin .50 mg (taken very sparingly)

11/25-11/27:Ambilify 1mg

11/27-11/29: Risperidal .5 mg

11/29-12/2: Risperidal 1mg

12/2-12/1:Riperidal .5 mg

12/1-12/23: Seroquil 25mg

12/1-12/5: Prozac 10mg

12/23-1/3: Zyprexa 5mg

1/3- :Seroquil 50mg

1/4: Xanax .50mg

Currently on 37.5 mg Seroquil, Xanax .5 mg used as needed typically 4

days a week.

Link to comment
  • Moderator

I've been talking with some of the other moderators about your reaction to the drugs.  I need to get answers back from several others and need to know the direction you want to go in before making any suggestions.  What we have come up with is this; some people are very sensitive to this type of medications and show extreme side effects right away when they start taking them.  It appears that you could be one of these people. You and psych drugs just don't get along.  That would mean it's not a good idea to take them at all, let alone increase the dosage.  Seeing that you've been on them a short time it should be relatively easy to get off of them.

20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013.

Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks.  The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better.

Final Dose 0.016mg.     Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017

 

"It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general."  Stephen Hawking

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I am very interested to see what the other moderators think. I can promise you that NONE of this was there until I started antipsychotics. I should have told the psychiatrist to F off but instead I was willing to try anything to get better.

 

I am willing now to get the heck off of them if it is because of these meds.

When I was on SSRIs in the past, I had issues as well.

 

I'd love to hear what the others think. I went back to 25mg of Seroquil last night. I'm probably tapering too fast, but if these are the meds that bother me, I want off of them.

10/28: khlonopin .50 mg (taken very sparingly)

11/25-11/27:Ambilify 1mg

11/27-11/29: Risperidal .5 mg

11/29-12/2: Risperidal 1mg

12/2-12/1:Riperidal .5 mg

12/1-12/23: Seroquil 25mg

12/1-12/5: Prozac 10mg

12/23-1/3: Zyprexa 5mg

1/3- :Seroquil 50mg

1/4: Xanax .50mg

Currently on 37.5 mg Seroquil, Xanax .5 mg used as needed typically 4

days a week.

Link to comment

I'm also reeeeally pissed that I talked to the psychiatrist when I started explaining my symptoms and she just excised them. Had I known, I would have stopped all but the khlonopin (yes I know Benzos are awful, but I'd rather stay and be on that than to be living in hell)

10/28: khlonopin .50 mg (taken very sparingly)

11/25-11/27:Ambilify 1mg

11/27-11/29: Risperidal .5 mg

11/29-12/2: Risperidal 1mg

12/2-12/1:Riperidal .5 mg

12/1-12/23: Seroquil 25mg

12/1-12/5: Prozac 10mg

12/23-1/3: Zyprexa 5mg

1/3- :Seroquil 50mg

1/4: Xanax .50mg

Currently on 37.5 mg Seroquil, Xanax .5 mg used as needed typically 4

days a week.

Link to comment
  • Administrator

When I was on SSRIs in the past, I had issues as well.

 

 

Hi, Buccaneer.

 

Welcome to SA from me, too. 

 

Please let us know your full psychiatric drug history. When were you on SSRIs in the past? How long were you on them and when did you come off? 

 

Also, please add your prior SSRI use to your signature. This information is important so we can give you the best and safest guidance possible. 

Drug free May 22, 2015 after 30 years of neuroleptics, benzos, z-drugs, so-called "anti"-depressants, and amphetamines 

 

My Success Story:  Shep's Success: "Leaving Plato's Cave"

 

And what is good, Phaedrus, and what is not good — need we ask anyone to tell us these things? ~ Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance


I am not a medical professional and this is not medical advice, but simply information based on my own experience, as well as other members who have survived these drugs.

 

Link to comment

Oh this was over 8 years ago, and only for 3 months. I can't even remember what the name was and I felt too numb so I stopped them.

10/28: khlonopin .50 mg (taken very sparingly)

11/25-11/27:Ambilify 1mg

11/27-11/29: Risperidal .5 mg

11/29-12/2: Risperidal 1mg

12/2-12/1:Riperidal .5 mg

12/1-12/23: Seroquil 25mg

12/1-12/5: Prozac 10mg

12/23-1/3: Zyprexa 5mg

1/3- :Seroquil 50mg

1/4: Xanax .50mg

Currently on 37.5 mg Seroquil, Xanax .5 mg used as needed typically 4

days a week.

Link to comment
  • Administrator

Thank you, Buccanneers. I was worried there was a long time SSRI use issue.

 

I'm glad that was the extent of it. And I'm really glad you're researching these drugs now. 

 

I understand your apprehension about using benzos, and that is such a wise response to these drugs. Dependency can happen in as little as two weeks, even when taken every 4 days. 

 

You mention using it for akathisia. When I had akathisia, I found that walking, pacing, rocking, etc. helped. And then I stumbled onto "walking meditation" and that really helped:

 

What is walking meditation?

 

There are a ton of walking meditations on YouTube for more information. Akathisia is one of the worst symptoms I had, making it impossible to sit still. But it's temporary. It will pass. 

 

There are some non-drug coping skills for handling OCD that may help listed here:

 

Non-drug coping skills

 

OCD: obsessive thoughts, compulsive behaviors

 

And this thread on neuro-emotions may be useful:

 

Neuro emotions 

 

I'm glad you have a lot of family support to get through this. That's important. 

 

Are you currently taking any supplements? 

 

Drug free May 22, 2015 after 30 years of neuroleptics, benzos, z-drugs, so-called "anti"-depressants, and amphetamines 

 

My Success Story:  Shep's Success: "Leaving Plato's Cave"

 

And what is good, Phaedrus, and what is not good — need we ask anyone to tell us these things? ~ Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance


I am not a medical professional and this is not medical advice, but simply information based on my own experience, as well as other members who have survived these drugs.

 

Link to comment

No I'm currently not taking any supplements. I did find out that I have the C677T heterozygous MTHFR gene mutation. The natural doctor I saw did suggest some supplements, and I bought them but haven't received them yet.

10/28: khlonopin .50 mg (taken very sparingly)

11/25-11/27:Ambilify 1mg

11/27-11/29: Risperidal .5 mg

11/29-12/2: Risperidal 1mg

12/2-12/1:Riperidal .5 mg

12/1-12/23: Seroquil 25mg

12/1-12/5: Prozac 10mg

12/23-1/3: Zyprexa 5mg

1/3- :Seroquil 50mg

1/4: Xanax .50mg

Currently on 37.5 mg Seroquil, Xanax .5 mg used as needed typically 4

days a week.

Link to comment

I spoke with Dr Yolande and she believes that I am suffering from homicidal akathisia

10/28: khlonopin .50 mg (taken very sparingly)

11/25-11/27:Ambilify 1mg

11/27-11/29: Risperidal .5 mg

11/29-12/2: Risperidal 1mg

12/2-12/1:Riperidal .5 mg

12/1-12/23: Seroquil 25mg

12/1-12/5: Prozac 10mg

12/23-1/3: Zyprexa 5mg

1/3- :Seroquil 50mg

1/4: Xanax .50mg

Currently on 37.5 mg Seroquil, Xanax .5 mg used as needed typically 4

days a week.

Link to comment
  • Administrator

I spoke with Dr Yolande and she believes that I am suffering from homicidal akathisia

 

 

Did she make any recommendations as to how to deal with this? 

Drug free May 22, 2015 after 30 years of neuroleptics, benzos, z-drugs, so-called "anti"-depressants, and amphetamines 

 

My Success Story:  Shep's Success: "Leaving Plato's Cave"

 

And what is good, Phaedrus, and what is not good — need we ask anyone to tell us these things? ~ Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance


I am not a medical professional and this is not medical advice, but simply information based on my own experience, as well as other members who have survived these drugs.

 

Link to comment

She said that history revealed itself as to when it all started when I started meds. She suggested I to go to the hospital. Unforuntately if I go, they will up the doses of medications. That's what they did when I went before. She said I needed to have a slow supervised withdrawal from the medication. How quickly but safely can I get off of this med if I have been on it for about 4 weeks? I need to stop these meds ASAP, but safely as possible.

10/28: khlonopin .50 mg (taken very sparingly)

11/25-11/27:Ambilify 1mg

11/27-11/29: Risperidal .5 mg

11/29-12/2: Risperidal 1mg

12/2-12/1:Riperidal .5 mg

12/1-12/23: Seroquil 25mg

12/1-12/5: Prozac 10mg

12/23-1/3: Zyprexa 5mg

1/3- :Seroquil 50mg

1/4: Xanax .50mg

Currently on 37.5 mg Seroquil, Xanax .5 mg used as needed typically 4

days a week.

Link to comment

Help?

What's the quickest but safest way to get off?

10/28: khlonopin .50 mg (taken very sparingly)

11/25-11/27:Ambilify 1mg

11/27-11/29: Risperidal .5 mg

11/29-12/2: Risperidal 1mg

12/2-12/1:Riperidal .5 mg

12/1-12/23: Seroquil 25mg

12/1-12/5: Prozac 10mg

12/23-1/3: Zyprexa 5mg

1/3- :Seroquil 50mg

1/4: Xanax .50mg

Currently on 37.5 mg Seroquil, Xanax .5 mg used as needed typically 4

days a week.

Link to comment

I know that my situation is unique. I am asking again because I didn't receive a response earlier. I talked with Dr Yolande on Skype, and she does believe that the medication is causing the issue. Along with my psychiatrist. She believes I need to do a slow taper. I'm not sure how to go about doing this. I have read the forums and it all says 10% a month, but I can't do that because of the side effects I am having are very serious. Do you all think 2-3 weeks or are we talking longer than that?

10/28: khlonopin .50 mg (taken very sparingly)

11/25-11/27:Ambilify 1mg

11/27-11/29: Risperidal .5 mg

11/29-12/2: Risperidal 1mg

12/2-12/1:Riperidal .5 mg

12/1-12/23: Seroquil 25mg

12/1-12/5: Prozac 10mg

12/23-1/3: Zyprexa 5mg

1/3- :Seroquil 50mg

1/4: Xanax .50mg

Currently on 37.5 mg Seroquil, Xanax .5 mg used as needed typically 4

days a week.

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

What did Dr. Lucire advise about the rate of taper? If nothing or you can't recall, can you follow up with her about this?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.
1997-1999 Effexor; 2002-2005 Effexor XR 37.5 mg linear taper, dropping same #beads/week with bad results

Cymbalta 60 mg 2012 - 2015; 2016: 20 mg to 7 mg exact doses and dates in this post; 2017: 6.3 mg to  0.0 mg  Aug. 12; details here


scallywag's Introduction
Online spreadsheet for dose taper calculations and nz11's THE WORKS spreadsheet

Link to comment

She said 6 weeks. The issue is I only have enough pills for about 3-4 weeks.

10/28: khlonopin .50 mg (taken very sparingly)

11/25-11/27:Ambilify 1mg

11/27-11/29: Risperidal .5 mg

11/29-12/2: Risperidal 1mg

12/2-12/1:Riperidal .5 mg

12/1-12/23: Seroquil 25mg

12/1-12/5: Prozac 10mg

12/23-1/3: Zyprexa 5mg

1/3- :Seroquil 50mg

1/4: Xanax .50mg

Currently on 37.5 mg Seroquil, Xanax .5 mg used as needed typically 4

days a week.

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Can you get the doctor who prescribed the Seroquel you have to prescribe 30 more days?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.
1997-1999 Effexor; 2002-2005 Effexor XR 37.5 mg linear taper, dropping same #beads/week with bad results

Cymbalta 60 mg 2012 - 2015; 2016: 20 mg to 7 mg exact doses and dates in this post; 2017: 6.3 mg to  0.0 mg  Aug. 12; details here


scallywag's Introduction
Online spreadsheet for dose taper calculations and nz11's THE WORKS spreadsheet

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

You made a post in Zodd's topic about songs playing in your head.  Here is SA's discussion: intrusive-repetitive-song-symptom-or-ear-worms

Please DO NOT TAG me - thank you

PLEASE NOTE:  I am not a medical professional.  I provide information and make suggestions. 

  MISSION ACCOMPLISHED:    (6 year taper)      0mg Pristiq      on 13th November 2021

ADs since ~1992:  25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq:  50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity)  Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021   LAST DOSE 0.0025mg

Post 0 updates start here    My tapering program     My Intro (goes to tapering graph)

 VIDEO:   Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management

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