powerback: tapering no 2

[powerback]

6 minutes ago, Shep said:

How was your sleep on the diazepam?

sleep was good .the usual morning intrusive thoughts were still there.

Strong depression and some apathy but that could be down to being house bound.

 

8 minutes ago, Shep said:

Did the air hunger symptom get better, get worse, or no change at all when you took the diazepam? 

no change .

going for just 1mg diazepam tonight.

Thanks shep.

 

[Altostrata]

If you can get by with 1mg diazepam or even less, all the better. Since it has such a long half-life, you might consider 2mg a loading dose. Any diazepam dose you take for the next several weeks will build on that.

 

Wasn't your sleep adequate before diazepam? How has it affected the quality or sleep pattern?

 

Since you've also added in the 8 beads of Effexor at the same time, hard to know what's doing what. We'll have to sort that out.

 

Please let us know how you're doing, pb.

[powerback]

8 hours ago, Altostrata said:

If you can get by with 1mg diazepam or even less, all the better. Since it has such a long half-life, you might consider 2mg a loading dose. Any diazepam dose you take for the next several weeks will build on that.

 

Wasn't your sleep adequate before diazepam? How has it affected the quality or sleep pattern?

 

Since you've also added in the 8 beads of Effexor at the same time, hard to know what's doing what. We'll have to sort that out.

 

Please let us know how you're doing, pb.

Ok sound thanks Alto.

Stinking bad mood ,fatigue and strong depression are the worst at the moment.

Ye sleep was mostly ok beforehand.

Cheers.

[powerback]

Today is only the 3rd day of taking the Effexor  beads and I can feel it ,slight nausea ,brain fog/brain static.confusion,dry ,mouth.

This was my whole point of the bridge to get away from this drug .Anyway on me .

I am taking the Effexor 2 hours after the Prozac now for weeks.

 

23/04/19=2mg diazepam 

24/04/19=1mg diazepam    taken between 2100 and 2200 hrs .

25/04/19=1mg diazepam

I will note every dose i take for the next few months.

[powerback]

2 hours ago, powerback said:

Ok sound thanks Alto.

Stinking bad mood ,fatigue and strong depression are the worst at the moment.

Ye sleep was mostly ok beforehand.

Cheers.

I must say the last 2 days at this time [11.00 on wards ] I get into an ok mood while listening to music ,even emotional [positive].

It falls flat in the afternoon .Anyways I must note this .

[Shep]

1 hour ago, powerback said:

I must say the last 2 days at this time [11.00 on wards ] I get into an ok mood while listening to music ,even emotional [positive].

It falls flat in the afternoon .Anyways I must note this .

 

Did this coincide with when you started taking diazepam? 

 

OK moods are good. I'm glad you're getting some breathing space. You may want to take note of the music that you find especially helpful. Music therapy was what got me through withdrawal, PB. It's an awesome non-drug coping technique. While you're stick inside, you might find this an interesting distraction: 

 

Music Therapy / Music for Wellness and Healing

 

 

[powerback]

24 minutes ago, Shep said:

Did this coincide with when you started taking diazepam? 

 

I think so ,it looks like it .im not  going  take any tonight ,im reluctant to take it every night.

26 minutes ago, Shep said:

take note of the music t

Have a nice play list .I used to listen to it before bed but I stopped this because I was staying up later than I should be .

28 minutes ago, Shep said:

While you're stick inside,

Easter weather was lovely ,cold is back .I got out for a walk on easter sunday[I sat on a bench and she walked further ] ,my partner enjoyed it because its months since ive been out on a sunday .we love our walks.i get so wrapped up in my own head about my issue and I don't think how it affects her .[well I do with the strong neuro guilt]. How do I ever repay her .this makes me  tear up [all good].

Thanks shep .take care.

[Shep]

On 4/26/2019 at 8:48 AM, powerback said:

I think so ,it looks like it .im not  going  take any tonight ,im reluctant to take it every night.

 

Since you did get some relief, what do you think about taking it every night for a week to see how you do? 

[Altostrata]

21 minutes ago, Shep said:

 

Since you did get some relief, what do you think about taking it every night for a week to see how you do? 

 

I agree with Shep, keeping things regular will help us see how it changes your symptom pattern. Even a quarter of a 2mg diazepam tablet each day at the same time can keep it steady.

 

On the other hand, you started the Effexor beads at the same time, that makes interpreting your current symptom pattern confusing.

 

On 4/26/2019 at 3:33 AM, powerback said:

Today is only the 3rd day of taking the Effexor  beads and I can feel it ,slight nausea ,brain fog/brain static.confusion,dry ,mouth.

This was my whole point of the bridge to get away from this drug .Anyway on me .

I am taking the Effexor 2 hours after the Prozac now for weeks.

 

23/04/19=2mg diazepam 

24/04/19=1mg diazepam    taken between 2100 and 2200 hrs .

25/04/19=1mg diazepam

I will note every dose i take for the next few months.

 

Given your apparent adverse reaction to Effexor, perhaps it would be best to keep the diazepam steady (I would try 1/4 tablet or 0.5mg diazepam per day for 2 weeks) while you back down the Effexor bead by bead each day. Let's see if the diazepam with Prozac can settle your system.

 

Please let us know how you're doing.

[powerback]

1 hour ago, Shep said:

 

Since you did get some relief, what do you think about taking it every night for a week to see how you do? 

Sounds good cheers shep.Thanks.

[powerback]

49 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

 

I agree with Shep, keeping things regular will help us see how it changes your symptom pattern. Even a quarter of a 2mg diazepam tablet each day at the same time can keep it steady.

 

On the other hand, you started the Effexor beads at the same time, that makes interpreting your current symptom pattern confusing.

 

 

Given your apparent adverse reaction to Effexor, perhaps it would be best to keep the diazepam steady (I would try 1/4 tablet or 0.5mg diazepam per day for 2 weeks) while you back down the Effexor bead by bead each day. Let's see if the diazepam with Prozac can settle your system.

 

Please let us know how you're doing.

When you thinking to reduce effexor?

Im 5 days into 8 beads.

Im in a bad way today.

Thanks alto ile give a small dose of diazepam a go.

I can tell feeling this bad is because of effexor from experience.my intolerance to the simplest stress is shocking.

Thanks alto.

[Altostrata]

I would reduce one bead a day until you're off Effexor. But you'll need to be consistent with diazepam. How does 1/4 tablet per night sound?

 

Please do not worry about diazepam, we'll help you taper off.

[powerback]

9 hours ago, Altostrata said:

I would reduce one bead a day until you're off Effexor. But you'll need to be consistent with diazepam. How does 1/4 tablet per night sound?

 

Please do not worry about diazepam, we'll help you taper off.

So in the next 8 days ile be off effexor during the 2 week peroid of taking diazepam.I took a 1/4 diazapam lastnight.

Sound thanks alto.

[powerback]

On ‎4‎/‎26‎/‎2019 at 11:33 AM, powerback said:

23/04/19=2mg diazepam  

24/04/19=1mg diazepam    taken between 2100 and 2200 hrs .

25/04/19=1mg diazepam

I will note every dose i take for the next few months.

Hi Alto will I use the above as  a start date for  the 2 weeks . 24/04/19

A nasty symptom ive had for a while but its getting worse is similar to" pure  O" OCD disturbing intrusive thoughts .its fairly distressing .

Thanks.

[Shep]

8 hours ago, powerback said:

A nasty symptom ive had for a while but its getting worse is similar to" pure  O" OCD disturbing intrusive thoughts .its fairly distressing .

 

Don't forget the old mindfulness adage about being The Observer.

 

As my favorite mindfulness guru Mooji puts it, "Your thoughts are just visitors and you are NOT a hotel! Don't invite them in!"

 

Easier said than done to simply watch those thoughts pass without engaging, but I found during acute withdrawal that these thoughts were so toxic and so distressing and I was so exhausted, I simply couldn't interact with them anymore. 

 

I pretended they were obnoxious neighbors and forced myself to change the channel. 

 

"Change the channel" -- dealing with cognitive symptoms

 

Go outside and touch the grass, watch a bird, see if you can find pictures in the clouds. Ground yourself in nature. 

 

Play video games. Watch stupid videos. 

 

If you can learn to disengage from your thoughts and become an independent Observer, the weight of the world will be lifted off you. Our thoughts are our worst enemies at times. 

 

[Altostrata]

pb, are you feeling any effect of the diazepam?

[powerback]

10 hours ago, Shep said:

 

Don't forget the old mindfulness adage about being The Observer.

 

As my favorite mindfulness guru Mooji puts it, "Your thoughts are just visitors and you are NOT a hotel! Don't invite them in!"

 

Easier said than done to simply watch those thoughts pass without engaging, but I found during acute withdrawal that these thoughts were so toxic and so distressing and I was so exhausted, I simply couldn't interact with them anymore. 

 

I pretended they were obnoxious neighbors and forced myself to change the channel. 

 

"Change the channel" -- dealing with cognitive symptoms

 

Go outside and touch the grass, watch a bird, see if you can find pictures in the clouds. Ground yourself in nature. 

 

Play video games. Watch stupid videos. 

 

If you can learn to disengage from your thoughts and become an independent Observer, the weight of the world will be lifted off you. Our thoughts are our worst enemies at times. 

 

HI shep ,my thoughts are automatically thicking off my sympathetic nervous system ,I cant control it .it feels like my whole lymbic systhem is destroyed.

It feels very diffferent and unnerving the last few months.

Thank for your help.take care.

[powerback]

7 hours ago, Altostrata said:

pb, are you feeling any effect of the diazepam?

I cant tell but I have had fleeting momments of ok mood but not near enough.

The morning fear and anxiety is huge .

Since the bridge the panic/ anxiety is through the roof.being stuck in the house is a complete disaster for me so I need to find a way out of it.

Winter seeems never ending and I cant bare any of the cold .

Im thinking when I drop all the beads I mite keep upping prozac to see if it works .this hell is alot worse than when I first went through withdrawal.

Thanks ALto.

[peng]

Thinking of you, PB.  So sad to read of your suffering.

I have often got the icy feet thing - even in this here central-heated house.

I got one of those electrically heated boots.  Keep it under the pc desk for when I sit here.

A bit less hassle than the hot water bottle.   So it makes me an old git! - can't knock it if it keeps the feet warm.

Best wishes to you.

Your partner sounds like a rock - as is my mrs.

[powerback]

53 minutes ago, peng said:

Thinking of you, PB.  So sad to read of your suffering.

I have often got the icy feet thing - even in this here central-heated house.

I got one of those electrically heated boots.  Keep it under the pc desk for when I sit here.

A bit less hassle than the hot water bottle.   So it makes me an old git! - can't knock it if it keeps the feet warm.

Best wishes to you.

Your partner sounds like a rock - as is my mrs.

Ah thanks peng your kind to visit ,apologies with our last interaction ,I hold my hands up to my defensiveness.

Good tip with the boots ,cheers.

My mother is on tyroid meds decades so im susceptible to tyroid issues and the stress of all this process

.im not as cocky as I was before about this process .the fall out is too much .I can blame DRs all day but I was clueless .house bound is the worst case scenario possible for me(well hospital is worse but being stuck in all day will drive me there) ,im wanting to go to Scotland to my brother for a break but im too ill to travel .

Take care peng your a kind person .

Good wishes to you and your wife .

 

 

 

 

[Altostrata]

pb, please do not increase Prozac until we see what diazepam does. If you take it at the same time each day, it will take a couple of weeks, at least, to reach full effect.

[powerback]

40 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

pb, please do not increase Prozac until we see what diazepam does. If you take it at the same time each day, it will take a couple of weeks, at least, to reach full effect.

I wont .

Do I reduce the 8 beads each day over the next 2 weeks?.

Thanks Alto ,take care.

[Altostrata]

Please reduce the Effexor by one bead per day. This should take 8 days.

[powerback]

34 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

Please reduce the Effexor by one bead per day. This should take 8 days.

Sound thanks alto ,I noticed today when I was dealing with a stressor my anxiety/panic  was high but it didn't overwhelming me for as long as it normally would and in the evening I was even able to think clear .maybe diazepam kicking in ,wort noting all the same .

Take care Alto ,your a saint .🙏 

[powerback]

Hi @Altostrata .its 6 days  since I went from Effexor crumb to the 8 beads ,I seem to be feeling it today.i went from 8 to 7 beads today.im wondering if I should stay at 7 beads for a few days ?.Headaches, irritation and intrusive thoughts are the big ones at me .

Thanks . 

[Altostrata]

Yes, stop reducing Effexor. Perhaps it was doing something after all.

[powerback]

3 hours ago, Altostrata said:

Yes, stop reducing Effexor. Perhaps it was doing something after all.

Ok thanks Alto.

[thecowisback]

how are you coping powerback? how are th ings?

[powerback]

2 hours ago, thecowisback said:

how are you coping powerback? how are th ings?

Hi TCIB,not good ,in a crisis state.my thoughts are impossible to turn off .I got out yesterday but my day was full of triggers.such misery is unlivable .

I hope our situation improves ,we deserve it.

Thanks for asking it means alot.

[thecowisback]

so sorry to hear things are so rough.  i don't know where to put myself right now with so many racing thoughts. i hope you find some peace soon xxxxx

[Shep]

1 hour ago, powerback said:

Hi TCIB,not good ,in a crisis state.my thoughts are impossible to turn off .I got out yesterday but my day was full of triggers.such misery is unlivable .

 

PB, do you feel the Valium is helping?

 

I wanted to touch base on this before you develop a dependency and see what your thoughts are on staying on it or stopping it. I don't want to pressure you in any direction, and would value your feedback. 

 

Please let us know. 

[powerback]

36 minutes ago, Shep said:

 

PB, do you feel the Valium is helping?

 

I wanted to touch base on this before you develop a dependency and see what your thoughts are on staying on it or stopping it. I don't want to pressure you in any direction, and would value your feedback. 

 

Please let us know. 

Thanks shep ,Im suffering with such mental anguish that I can already see im clock watching for 21.30 each night(im a complete addict so I need to be wary alright .

Im not sure if its connected to the diazepam but I had a very very  intense dream lastnight  (not distressing ,actually a nice one).I generally am never shy with dreaming anyway but this was a whole different level.

I woke suicidal this morning ,but it disapated during the morning.

Yesterday was full of stressors and triggers ,im hunkered down today .

Sound shep thanks.

[powerback]

1 hour ago, thecowisback said:

so sorry to hear things are so rough.  i don't know where to put myself right now with so many racing thoughts. i hope you find some peace soon xxxxx

You too TCIB .I cant wait to spill some milk when this is over ,we can have something normal to complain about ha.

Take care.

[Altostrata]

pb, how much diazepam are you taking, at what time of day?

 

Since you started taking diazepam regularly (please put date in signature), would you say anything has improved? That deep sleep was a little different, wasn't it?

[powerback]

1 minute ago, Altostrata said:

pb, how much diazepam are you taking, at what time of day?

 

Since you started taking diazepam regularly (please put date in signature), would you say anything has improved? That deep sleep was a little different, wasn't it?

Hi Alto mostly I take  1/4 of a 2mg tablet ,the odd night im taking 1/2 if im agitated taking between 21.30 and 22.00.

Not improved enough to be honest ,my intrusive thoughts/racing thoughts are endless and im not feeling well at all .Im not comfortable out and about in public .

Im thinking drop the Effexor and up the Prozac? ,I cant really bare my reality much longer to be honest ..

I so want to improve for us all ,im fed up having to write this misery ,I cant wait to say im fine some day so we can be happy .

Its hard to get away from pre existing conditions scenario when im so ill .

Ile sort signature .

Take care Alto. 

 

 

[Altostrata]

Change only one thing at a time, pb. How about consistently taking 1/2 of a 2mg tablet? Please put this in your signature. We need to keep notes of your drug changes, they're very important now.