bheb Posted November 30, 2017 Share Posted November 30, 2017 Hi raven. I noticed we're about the same age (I'm 21)...I very much relate to the comment about noticing others enjoying life and wanting to feel ok so desperately. I don't have the same symptoms but I have akathisia from Prozac and it's been wearing me down in a similar way. Ive been enrolled in university the past year that I've had it, but I now have to withdraw. I probably would've reacted the same as you...almost sobbing at the thought of drunk students laughing like I once did. Aug-Dec 2015 Prozac 20mg / Dec 2015-Feb 2016 Prozac 15mg / Feb 2016-May2016 Prozac 20mg May 2016-June 2016 15mg June 2016-August 2016 10mg October 2016-January 2017 15mg, alternating agitation/akathisia sets in --> cold turkey January 2017 Clonazepam .5mg February 2017 Clonazepam 1mg (for a week) then .5mg morning and .25mg evening for about a month. Came down to .25mg morning and evening. May 1, 2017 Clonazepam .25mg morning and .125mg evening. // May 20, 2017 Clonazepam .25mg morning and .0625 evening (.3125 total). early June .28125 // early mid june .25mg // mid june .21875 // late june .1875 // early july .15625 // early mid july .125 mid july .09375mg // late july .0625 //early August 2017 down to .03125mg once a day, hopped off in mid August reinstated at .0625mg late August // Oct 16 - updose to .07mg and switch to oral Rosemont solution Nov 17 2017 reinstate Prozac .5mg // Nov 21 2017 prozac 1.6mg // Dec 18 2017 3mg prozac / fast taper off the reinstatement -- probably completely off early Oct 2018 June 2019 begin tapering off .07mg Clonazepam, Finish taper December 2019 Link to comment
nicolantana Posted December 5, 2017 Share Posted December 5, 2017 Feeling the same way brother. probably the worst I've felt. haven't smiled in 4 months. previously incredible willpower falling away. interest in going through motions evaporating. Bed ridden. caged. Tortured. late July...lexapro 10 seroquel 25.....due to mild depression......adverse reaction, suicidal thoughts, hospitalization August....felt that meds were ripping stomach apart....docs didn't believe me..upped meds to seroquel 125, lexapro 20, mirtazapine 30, olanzapine 20....stayed on these drugs unitl mid november......severe anhedonia all the time...mid novemeber 2016 , began taper.....very small windows of emotion...Christmas....off everything by Christmas day......last six weeks, cried and laughed on a number of occasions for first time since taking initial meds....8 occasions of strong emotion over 6 weeks in ealry 2016.......doubting recovery...... BIG WINDOW IN july 2017, felt incredible, lasted a month or so, felt close to recovered...window left, september to Chrimstas 17 was anhedonic hell.....Turn of the year, January 2018, some very strong days (a window) offering renewed hope back to hell until late February 2018, strong 10 day window....followed by anhedonic wave for 7 months straight! not a flicker of normalcy September 2018 ...incredible window...followed by three month wave.January 2019.... a strong window window subsided, but new baseline was higher.....life since January 2019 ( 9 months and counting) has been far better. Complete anhedonia is gone!! God, I've tears writing that. I am far from recovered, but far from hell...to use a scale, if life is rated out of a hundred, I was about minus 50 for the majority of 2 years..I know feel about 30 per cent of self, experiences intermittent flickers of normal life regularly....My days have more quality and I am optimistic of recovery. Link to comment
raven530 Posted December 6, 2017 Author Share Posted December 6, 2017 It's seriously rough, I remember last winter being similar so not sure if that's just a coincidence but woulda hoped for something a bit better this time around. PSSD, Anhedonia, Loss of Imagination and creativity, physical pressure in head all from taking 50mg Sertraline for a month back in February 2015. Not seen much improvement (if any). Time of writing this signature - 01/02/2016 (UK date format) Link to comment
raven530 Posted February 21, 2018 Author Share Posted February 21, 2018 I unfortunately don't believe I am going to recover anymore. My PSSD symptoms haven't got better one bit now for a long time. I've seen so many stories of this just persisting, persisting, persisting and even though I have done everything in my power to heal I haven't got anywhere, and I'm two years off the drugs. I'm almost 22, and I was 19 when this started. Look at these papers:https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/16709553 http://bjp.rcpsych.org/content/176/3/29 ... t.pdf+htmlhttps://www.sciencedirect.com/science/a ... 2117300720 Not sure what I'm going to do now. I can't just keep waiting for a miracle. I used to think that the people on this forum who were 5-10 years out with no recovery were incredibly depressed or manic, and that it wasn't the AD that caused their symptoms, but now I believe that anyone who has to live with this kind of issue for years and years naturally becomes more agitated about it, and unfortunately that delegitimises them in the eyes of others. PSSD, Anhedonia, Loss of Imagination and creativity, physical pressure in head all from taking 50mg Sertraline for a month back in February 2015. Not seen much improvement (if any). Time of writing this signature - 01/02/2016 (UK date format) Link to comment
samanthaelizabeth Posted February 21, 2018 Share Posted February 21, 2018 Why don't you just try a different Antidepressant that isn't an SSRI? You can stabilize on that and then begin your slow taper. You want to be happy don't you? I really don't see any point in suffering. Just my opinion, I'm not a mod. Ativan Mid April 1999-to end of May 1999 ( COLD TURKEY and flushed them down the toilet) I went through hell for 3 months-I had no idea what was happening to me there was no information on the internet about this drug) Zoloft 200mg 1999 to 2017 Wellbutrin 2015 6 months Started having exterme anxiety-quit taking switched back to Zoloft ( I have quit about 6 jobs from this time0 Klonopin .5-1.0 of and on for two months (tapered off in Dec-Jan) 15 mg Remeron 2012-presnt **Started tapering down Zoloft 12/?/17 12/09/17 down to 50mg; 12/12/17-12/14-17 Zoloft 100mg; 12/16/201712/19 -Zoloft 150mg; 12/20/17-01/06/18 Zoloft 200mg; 01/07/18-01//18/18 Zoloft 180mg 01/18/18-present Zoloft 200mg February 2018-Copaxone 40mg (3 times a week shots) (for Multiple Sclerosis)2/17/18 begin transition to liquid 200mg magnesium, fish oil Link to comment
raven530 Posted February 21, 2018 Author Share Posted February 21, 2018 Fear mostly, I've seen that medications designed to influence the psyche can alter things I never thought possible, such as deep emotions and basic sexuality. What if the next antidepressant I take removes my awareness? Then I may still be a zombie, only now I won't even care. It might remove a function that I didn't even consider important only to find out afterwards how vital it was. My above comment was written at a real height of desperation. I am desperate but I don't want anyone reading this to feel despair like I do sometimes when reading negative posts. There is hope and I know people have recovered. I just don't think waiting is going to cut it for me anymore. I might experiment with substances that are much safer like Inositol and CBD Oil. PSSD, Anhedonia, Loss of Imagination and creativity, physical pressure in head all from taking 50mg Sertraline for a month back in February 2015. Not seen much improvement (if any). Time of writing this signature - 01/02/2016 (UK date format) Link to comment
nicolantana Posted February 26, 2018 Share Posted February 26, 2018 check my update bro. keep the faith late July...lexapro 10 seroquel 25.....due to mild depression......adverse reaction, suicidal thoughts, hospitalization August....felt that meds were ripping stomach apart....docs didn't believe me..upped meds to seroquel 125, lexapro 20, mirtazapine 30, olanzapine 20....stayed on these drugs unitl mid november......severe anhedonia all the time...mid novemeber 2016 , began taper.....very small windows of emotion...Christmas....off everything by Christmas day......last six weeks, cried and laughed on a number of occasions for first time since taking initial meds....8 occasions of strong emotion over 6 weeks in ealry 2016.......doubting recovery...... BIG WINDOW IN july 2017, felt incredible, lasted a month or so, felt close to recovered...window left, september to Chrimstas 17 was anhedonic hell.....Turn of the year, January 2018, some very strong days (a window) offering renewed hope back to hell until late February 2018, strong 10 day window....followed by anhedonic wave for 7 months straight! not a flicker of normalcy September 2018 ...incredible window...followed by three month wave.January 2019.... a strong window window subsided, but new baseline was higher.....life since January 2019 ( 9 months and counting) has been far better. Complete anhedonia is gone!! God, I've tears writing that. I am far from recovered, but far from hell...to use a scale, if life is rated out of a hundred, I was about minus 50 for the majority of 2 years..I know feel about 30 per cent of self, experiences intermittent flickers of normal life regularly....My days have more quality and I am optimistic of recovery. Link to comment
Clatterbust Posted January 23, 2019 Share Posted January 23, 2019 Hey raven, How are you doing? 1 Paxil (20mg): Nov. 2012 - June 2014. CT of paxil. Severe psyhological symptoms. Reinstatement of Paxil (20mg): September 2014. Several attempts (4 or 5) of withdrawal, failing each time (due to increased symptoms:hypersensitivity to sounds, panic, anxiety) and reinstating back to 20mg. Last reinstatement was in January 2016. Symptoms still present. Stopped paxil cold turkey by the end of January, and switched to Citalopram (30mg) Citalopram (30mg): Feb 1st 2016 - March 17 2016. CT off Citalopram. Escitalopram (10mg): March 18 2016 - April 14 2016 Escitalopram (15mg): April 15 2016 - on going. Symptoms: Anxiety, Panic, Hypersensitivity to sounds, Tinnitus, Anhedonia. Link to comment
Mentor Amira Posted June 16, 2020 Mentor Share Posted June 16, 2020 I can 100% relate to the experience of @raven530 and @nicolantana I know nicolantana has recovered but i wish raven could come back to tell us how is he doing Cymbalta 30 mg- 60 mg 06/2016- 10/2018 ( Cold Turkey) Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted February 1, 2021 Administrator Share Posted February 1, 2021 @raven530 how are you doing? This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
raven530 Posted June 28, 2021 Author Share Posted June 28, 2021 Hey everyone, it's been a very long time! A little update from me after a few years out. Overall my quality of life has increased, mostly because of self improvement and changing life circumstances rather than improvement in the symptoms I experience, though there has been improvement there. In terms of anhedonia, my baseline is 20-30% above where it was at the beginning, I can connect with sad music and enjoy books which convey mostly sad/ambiguous emotion. It's not ideal, I was hesitant to give any update because I know that reading the accounts of long term strugglers can be really depressing for people who are more recently off the drugs, however I think the message that life can have a significant upward trajectory even while we are dealing with these issues is important. I'm still seeking solutions, and can't be content with where I am now, but quite paradoxically after many years out I feel more hopeful and positive about the future than ever. All the best to everyone 1 PSSD, Anhedonia, Loss of Imagination and creativity, physical pressure in head all from taking 50mg Sertraline for a month back in February 2015. Not seen much improvement (if any). Time of writing this signature - 01/02/2016 (UK date format) Link to comment
Mentor Hanna72 Posted June 28, 2021 Mentor Share Posted June 28, 2021 Hi @raven530 I am glad you are having improvements, that’s a good sign of healing. 1 hour ago, raven530 said: I'm still seeking solutions, and can't be content with where I am now, but quite paradoxically after many years out I feel more hopeful and positive about the future than ever. That’s a good attitude to have, hope and faith will get us along way. Wishing you all the best. 1999-2020 20 mg Paxil Bridged with Fluoxetine to help me get off Paxil. 2022 Fluoxetine 15 mg 12/12 14mg 27/12 13mg jan 12mg feb 11mg mars 10mg, 9 mg 8,5 mg 7.6mg 7.0 mg 6,3 mg 5,6 mg 5,0 mg 4,5 mg 4,0 mg 3.6mg 3,2 mg 2,9 mg 2,6 mg 2,3 mg 2,0 mg I am not a medical professional nor is this a medical advice. I only talk from my own experience. Link to comment
Mentor Amira Posted June 29, 2021 Mentor Share Posted June 29, 2021 This update has made me severly depressed. Are we permenantly damaged? 6 years and still have anhedonia? I just can't believe what happened to us! Why are we being told that people eventually recover fully from this? Cymbalta 30 mg- 60 mg 06/2016- 10/2018 ( Cold Turkey) Link to comment
raven530 Posted July 3, 2021 Author Share Posted July 3, 2021 I really do feel permanently damaged to be honest PSSD, Anhedonia, Loss of Imagination and creativity, physical pressure in head all from taking 50mg Sertraline for a month back in February 2015. Not seen much improvement (if any). Time of writing this signature - 01/02/2016 (UK date format) Link to comment
Fromthenetherlands Posted July 9, 2021 Share Posted July 9, 2021 Have your cognitive abilities recovered fully? Citalopram augustus 2020 - 20 mg untill 14 february 2021 quit cold turkey. No alcohol use or other medicine. No surgery. Only adviced supplements and little bit of vitamine D because of defficieny. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus arbor Posted July 23, 2021 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted July 23, 2021 Hi @raven530 I appreciate you posting. From what I understand recovery for some of us can be truly, truly, truly slow, and definitely up and down. The one thing on this site you are not--is alone. There are hardly words that can describe the anguish these evil drugs cause. I'm grateful that you're there. Arbor💜💜💜 2 Zoloft: 1995 - 2015 Prozac: 2015 - 2018 (tapered from 40mg x day on July 31 to 30mg on August 31 to 20mg on September 31 to 10mg October 31 to 0mg on December 15, 2018 Gabapentin: 2016 to 2019 (tapered from 300mg x day to 150mg on August 31, 2019 to 75mg on September 15 to 50mg on September 31 to 25ishmg on October 15 to 0mg on December 1, 2019 Enalapril: 2010 - 2019 Lipitor: 2017 -2017 Metformin: 2000 - 2020 Liothyronine: 2007 - 2019 Levothyroxine: 2000 - 2022 Link to comment
julesb Posted December 29, 2021 Share Posted December 29, 2021 @raven530 how are you doing? zoloft 50-100 mg 2012-2020 Reinstated zoloft 50mg for 2 months 2021 and switched back to Lexapro 10mg Reinstated 10mg 2021 later that year July-september 2021 Reinstated after 4 week withdrawal for 4 days plus lamictal 5mg october 16th Wellbutrin 100mg for 2 days November 2021 Currently on nothing Link to comment
raven530 Posted February 15, 2022 Author Share Posted February 15, 2022 A bit better thanks, disciplined exercise keeps me above water. Started working too, a bit more financial freedom will be helpful for me I think PSSD, Anhedonia, Loss of Imagination and creativity, physical pressure in head all from taking 50mg Sertraline for a month back in February 2015. Not seen much improvement (if any). Time of writing this signature - 01/02/2016 (UK date format) Link to comment
raven530 Posted July 1, 2022 Author Share Posted July 1, 2022 Apologies for leaving quite blunt and demoralising posts earlier on, they are not reflective of my day to day attitude, I was just particularly bitter about the struggle most of us share at that moment in time PSSD, Anhedonia, Loss of Imagination and creativity, physical pressure in head all from taking 50mg Sertraline for a month back in February 2015. Not seen much improvement (if any). Time of writing this signature - 01/02/2016 (UK date format) Link to comment
raven530 Posted July 18, 2022 Author Share Posted July 18, 2022 I think I have reached the point where I will need to try some other medication. Unfortunately despite keeping a positive mindset for most of my struggle and taking a proactive approach to my recovery, I haven't seen the results I would have liked, I still suffer from severe brain fog, anhedonia and sexual dysfunction. Seven years later I feel like my overall cognition and personality have really started to suffer too.. I have lost a large part of my youth, so now I really need to try another approach to get some relief. I am thinking of trying Moclobemide, has anyone experience with this drug, or recommend any other? PSSD, Anhedonia, Loss of Imagination and creativity, physical pressure in head all from taking 50mg Sertraline for a month back in February 2015. Not seen much improvement (if any). Time of writing this signature - 01/02/2016 (UK date format) Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus ChessieCat Posted July 18, 2022 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted July 18, 2022 Even though we are empathetic to your situation, SA is a site for reducing or going off psychiatric drugs. Please note that asking for drug recommendations or making recommendations is not permitted on SA. There are other sites where you can discuss what drugs to try. See at the bottom of the following quote. Note to members: suggesting drugs for another member to try could be very dangerous, and the following also applies to members recommending drugs. Please carefully read the following which is from "What Will Get You Warned or Banned": On 6/16/2011 at 4:45 AM, Altostrata said: - Drug shopping or recommending drugs This is a site for going off drugs. It is not a site for finding out what drug to take next, comparing drug cocktails, or recommending what drug to add. This could be dangerous. People could be hurt by your advice. We do not advocate experimenting with hallucinogenics, psychedelic mushrooms, herbs, adaptogenics, or any gray-market drug. You never know exactly what you're getting and results are unpredictable even in people whose nervous systems have not been compromised by adverse drug reactions. If your nervous system has been sensitized by adverse effects from psychiatric drugs (or street drugs) or withdrawal, , you could make yourself a lot worse by experimenting with hallucinogenics, etc., and the only remedy is to cope with your symptoms until they go away. We don't have any magic potions for you. Try such substances at your own risk. If you take street drugs or gray-market drugs and have an adverse reaction, we may not be able to provide you support as you recover and may ask you to leave SurvivingAntidepressants.org. (We do not know of any drugs or drug combination that will fix withdrawal syndrome. Reinstatement of the original drug, often at a low dose, sometimes helps and sometimes does not.) For the safety of our members, we cannot permit people to give irresponsible drug advice on this site. If you get a warning for this, please take it to heart. If you feel you must tell a member to seek help from a physician, please specify the physician. Most likely, the member has joined this site because of lack of success finding a knowledgeable doctor. If you believe taking psychiatric drugs will help a particular member, please specify drug and dosage. Take responsibility for your advice. If you cannot do this, don't tell people to take more drugs. They don't know what to take and neither do their doctors. I and the staff here on SurvivingAntidepressants.org don't know, either. If you want to discuss your diagnoses and talk about adding to your drug cocktail or balancing it, there are other support sites for this, such as http://DepressionForums.org or http://PatientsLikeMe.com. * NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA * MISSION ACCOMPLISHED: (6 year taper) 0mg Pristiq on 13th November 2021 ADs since ~1992: 25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq: 50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity) Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021 LAST DOSE 0.0025mg Post 0 updates start here My tapering program My Intro (goes to tapering graph) VIDEO: Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus ChessieCat Posted July 18, 2022 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted July 18, 2022 6 hours ago, raven530 said: I am thinking of trying Moclobemide Highlight mine. Moclobemide Moclobemide is a Reversible Inhibitor of Monoamine oxidase-A drug primarily used to treat depression and social anxiety. It is not approved for use in the United States, but is approved in other Western countries such as Canada, the UK and Australia.Wikipedia I suggest that you do your own research about possible side effects etc of any drugs that you consider BEFORE taking them. Because your nervous system may be sensitised I would also suggest that if you do decide to try a psychiatric drug to start with a very low dose as a test first to see how react. Also, adverse reactions are generally dose related so if you get a bad reaction you might have less of a bad reaction and may recover faster if you have only taken a small amount. Anyway, just things to consider. * NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA * MISSION ACCOMPLISHED: (6 year taper) 0mg Pristiq on 13th November 2021 ADs since ~1992: 25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq: 50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity) Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021 LAST DOSE 0.0025mg Post 0 updates start here My tapering program My Intro (goes to tapering graph) VIDEO: Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted July 18, 2022 Administrator Share Posted July 18, 2022 Sorry, we can't advise you about trying new antidepressants for the symptoms you report. 1 This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
weemie Posted August 9, 2022 Share Posted August 9, 2022 @raven530 I share all of your symptoms. I had an adverse reaction to a sertraline reinstatement 8 months ago. I was 19, the same age as you were. no change in my condition over all of these months. I'm starting photobiomodulation therapy soon which shows promise in treating things like neurodegenerative disorders and brain injury. may be something for you to look into. I'll report my results. 2016: started sertraline 25mg - upped dose to 75mg and tapered down to 25mg. 2017: June - skipped doses to taper sertraline 25mg. December - reinstated sertraline 25mg 2018: October - skipped doses to taper sertraline 25mg. 2019: January - reinstated sertraline 25mg because of dp/dr symptoms 2020: October - basically CTd sertraline 25mg. enter protracted withdrawal. 2021: Dec 9th - ADR to sertraline reinstatement at 25mg. Dec 10th - Zopiclone 2.5 mg. Dec 11th - zopiclone 5 mg. Dec 17th(?) - sertraline 25mg. Dec 24th - sertraline 25mg. Dec 25th - sertraline 25mg. December/January: was double dosing b12 1000mcg at some point :$ Link to comment
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