thecowisback: wondering why I'm giving up Prozac

[thecowisback]

i keep trying to turn my thinking around - catching myself descibing my thoughts as scary, terrifying, and telling myself this is temporary and that this will soon pass - today will be a better day but some days it's hard than others to believe that. 

[thecowisback]

21/03

7 am got up. took prozac 2.5mg feeling very scared and anxious. 

8.30 took kids to school. feeling too scared to run errands. 

10.30 psyched myself up to run the errands but feeling very scared, panicky and couldn't wait to get back home. 

5.00 cooked dinner, started crying. stopped around 5.30. managed to talk myself into thinking things weren't too bad. 

watched tv in the evening, feelings of panic rising. 

8.20 panic attack started. tried to relax, put on music on headphones but obesssive thoughts took over and had a full blown panic attack. went to bed to 

escape from everyone. got up at 11.30 to take took candesartan 4 mg, levothyroxine 75mcg,magnesium 200mg, sage leaf 50mg. slept on and off until 5.10 then wide awake. 

 

[Ather]

Would you please share with me how long have you been suffering from panic ?

[thecowisback]

it started in may 2017, a few months after stopping the prozac.

[Rachellynn]

I never even heard of panic attacks until i tried to go off Prozac 😕 i wish there were simpler answers for all of us. Sending love❤️

[thecowisback]

i had anxiety and panic attacks before i started and i took it for my ocd but none of those things were anywhere near the level they're at now. i don't think anyone can understand how bad the fear can get until they've been through withdrawals. 

[Rachellynn]

No one does understand. It’s unimaginable. Right now, my insomnia is out of control. My poor CNS is very stressed so just trying to breathe through. Accept it and train my body to relax and heal. We must stay strong. Healing is more than possible. 

[thecowisback]

💙

[Ather]

11 hours ago, thecowisback said:

it started in may 2017, a few months after stopping the prozac.

 

There are 2 things that come to my mind:

 

If the positives of upping the medicine out-weigh the negatives then you should do it.

None of us has been guaranteed to live a 100 years, we do not know if we are going to see tomorrow, make your today better, we'll think of tomorrow later.

[thecowisback]

i've bitten the bullet and upped it. i'll update my signature larer when i can get on the computer. 

 

[thecowisback]

i've just been checking my notes and the 4 calm days came a week after upping my dose. i'm hoping the calm came because of the 3mg i took for 3 days as it would have kicked in about a week later. only time will tell. 

[Ather]

lol let me have a good laugh dear sister, from 2.5 to 3 mg makes you worried, haha, you were taking 40 mg a day without even letting your own self know

 

Just chill and relax, don't pull a thought like a chewing gum, live and enjoy the day ! 

[thecowisback]

that's true ather!

[thecowisback]

22/03

7 am took prozac 2.5mg. bad night's sleep. very tired and anxious

11.20 headache. drunk lots of water. anxious. ocd is very bad. 

3.30 picked up kids from school. anxiety levels high because of the traffic. 

5.00 cooked dinner. feeling tearful but didn't cry tonight. 

7.30 watched film with the kids. trying to keep my attention on the film but keep thinking about ocd thoughts. very scared. 

11.00 candesartan 4 mg, levothyroxine 75mcg,magnesium 200mg, sage leaf 50mg. fell asleep quite quickly. up at 3 am, 4 am and awake completely at 4.45 am

[Altostrata]

On 3/19/2019 at 11:43 AM, thecowisback said:

i take the candesartan in the morning as the side effects in the first few days were keeping me awake, same with the prozac.

 

When did you start taking candesartan at night and why? With taking candesartan at night, how has your symptom pattern changed?

 

Do your OCD thoughts all have the same content? Did you ever take a stress reduction course?

[thecowisback]

i took the candesartan at night on 20th as you said it may have been affecting the prozac.

my symptoms don't seem to have changed by taking at night. 

my ocd thoughts usually have the same content. i did a stress reduction course online the year before last (referred by my doctor because the waiting list for counselling here is neverending). 

[Ather]

Prozac + Levothyroxine + Candesartan = 0 Interactions found.

 

We have to take the "worry" part  >>>>>>>>> out, out of our lives for now   

 

[thecowisback]

i don't know how to update my signature now as it says there's something wrong with it when i try to change it. 

[ChessieCat]

There is a limit to the number of lines.  You've reached the maximum.

 

You will need to condense it.

 

14/01/2019 started taking 1mg prozac 

26/01/2019 started 1.5 mg prozac

4/2/2019 started 2.00mg prozac

16/02/2019 started 2.5mg prozac

26/02/2019 started candesartan 4mg, discontinued amlodipine. 

2/03/2019 started 3mg prozac.

5/03/2019 dropped back to 2.5mg prozac

 

 

Amlodipine:  START DATE, discontinued 26 Feb 2019

Candesartan:  26 Feb 2019, 4mg

Prozac:  14 Jan 2019, 1mg; 26 Jan, 1.5mg; 4 Feb, 2mg; 16 Feb, 2.5mg; 2 Mar, 3mg; 5 Mar, 2.5mg

 

[thecowisback]

thankyou  

 

[thecowisback]

23/03

7 am took 3mg prozac. feeling very anxious and tired. got a cold. 

10 am took kids out for the day. still high anxiety. 

5.30 had takeaway for dinner. calmer than this morning. 

watched films all evening. much calmer. 

12.30 took  candesartan 4 mg, levothyroxine 75mcg,magnesium 200mg, sage leaf 50mg 

bad night's sleep. waking every hour until just after 5 am. 

[Altostrata]

On 3/23/2019 at 1:03 PM, thecowisback said:

my ocd thoughts usually have the same content. i did a stress reduction course online the year before last (referred by my doctor because the waiting list for counselling here is neverending). 

 

These are probably not caused by withdrawal. You will need to address these thoughts with a counselor. Writing these thoughts down when they occur to you might help.

 

How long have you been taking candesartan at night? Has your sleep been affected?

[Ather]

10 hours ago, thecowisback said:

23/03

7 am took 3mg prozac. feeling very anxious and tired. got a cold. 

10 am took kids out for the day. still high anxiety. 

5.30 had takeaway for dinner. calmer than this morning. 

watched films all evening. much calmer. 

12.30 took  candesartan 4 mg, levothyroxine 75mcg,magnesium 200mg, sage leaf 50mg 

bad night's sleep. waking every hour until just after 5 am. 

 

That anxiety is not because of the medication. It is because of the "thought" that you have taken it

 

You need to remind yourself again and again that you were taking 40 mgs of the same medicine, your anxiety is going to subside as soon as we reach the desired dosage.

Remember that you left it because you were feeling "tired" and that there was no other serious side-effect.

[thecowisback]

took it at night from the 20th march. no difference to sleep pattern. 

i know i need to get a handle on my ocd. so far counselling and other courses haven't been that helpful. 

when i was on the meds and i had a bad bout of ocd i could go through the cbt steps really easily in my head and dismiss the obsessions. i thought i was well equipped with the tools to do that when i came off the meds but i hadn't realised the ocd would get so much worse once i wasn't taking prozac. i was very naive. 

[Ather]

By "desired dosage" I meant where you feel stable, it can be 5 mg or 10 mg maybe 15 or 20, the thing is that you have come a long way, 2 years ? you will stabilize at a much lower dosage, but the good news is that You will !! by the Will of God Almighty.

[thecowisback]

thankyou ather x

[thecowisback]

24/03

8 am took prozac 3mg. still got a really snotty cold. 

feel depressed which surprised me as i thought the depressive feelings had left. 

11 am family came to visit. tried to be sociable but feeling very down. 

3 pm had a nap. woke up 30 minutes later feeling very scared. 

5 pm cooked dinner. tearful and panicky. feeling hopeless. 

8 pm took a shower and went to bed. couldn't face speaking to anyone and feel like everything is going wrong. lots of doom -laden thoughts about the future. could hear the family laughing at tv shows downstairs and felt envious but couldn't bring myself to go down and join in.

11pm took levothyroxine 75mcg, magnesium 200mg, sage leaf 50mg. 

fell asleep around 12.30 am

[Vonnegutjunky]

16 hours ago, thecowisback said:

took it at night from the 20th march. no difference to sleep pattern. 

i know i need to get a handle on my ocd. so far counselling and other courses haven't been that helpful. 

when i was on the meds and i had a bad bout of ocd i could go through the cbt steps really easily in my head and dismiss the obsessions. i thought i was well equipped with the tools to do that when i came off the meds but i hadn't realised the ocd would get so much worse once i wasn't taking prozac. i was very naive. 

I don’t think they are helpful during acute withdrawals either - I don’t think anything is - but as you heal they should get easier to manage - that’s why I am on Paxil or why I initially got on it and like you- when they ocd came while on Paxil I was able to effectively cope - now I am crippled by the intrusive thoughts - I regret 100% ever trying to come off this med - I always will - but it’s too late for me now - I have no choice after a having kindled my brain- - 

 

I don’t know how the hell im going to ever function normally again without a med - the ocd is ferociously consuming- 

[thecowisback]

😢😢😢

[Ather]

7 hours ago, Vonnegutjunky said:

I don’t think they are helpful during acute withdrawals either - I don’t think anything is - but as you heal they should get easier to manage - that’s why I am on Paxil or why I initially got on it and like you- when they ocd came while on Paxil I was able to effectively cope - now I am crippled by the intrusive thoughts - I regret 100% ever trying to come off this med - I always will - but it’s too late for me now - I have no choice after a having kindled my brain- - 

 

I don’t know how the hell im going to ever function normally again without a med - the ocd is ferociously consuming- 

 

Your "thought" is limiting you, every part in the body including our brain has the power to heal, this is just a psychological trauma, even if it was a physical trauma like a concussion, it would heal with time.

 

If you stick to such pattern of thinking it will take longer, if you don't, you will soon come out.

 

Don't build walls, let things happen, let them go, don't hold them.

[Ather]

22 hours ago, thecowisback said:

24/03

8 am took prozac 3mg. still got a really snotty cold. 

feel depressed which surprised me as i thought the depressive feelings had left. 

11 am family came to visit. tried to be sociable but feeling very down. 

3 pm had a nap. woke up 30 minutes later feeling very scared. 

5 pm cooked dinner. tearful and panicky. feeling hopeless. 

8 pm took a shower and went to bed. couldn't face speaking to anyone and feel like everything is going wrong. lots of doom -laden thoughts about the future. could hear the family laughing at tv shows downstairs and felt envious but couldn't bring myself to go down and join in.

11pm took levothyroxine 75mcg, magnesium 200mg, sage leaf 50mg. 

fell asleep around 12.30 am

 

Please know that Up and Down will continue until we reach the desired dosage, dear Sister

[thecowisback]

letting go of thoughts is what i find the hardest, especially when they happen at night.

[thecowisback]

25/03

7 am took 3mg prozac. 

8.30 took kids to school. feeling very low. went home and did chores. trying to push through the depression and scary thoughts.

1.20 bad headache. not sure if it's because of my cold. drunk lots of water. 

2.30 nodded off on sofa. extremely tired.

4.00 sorted out a kitchen cupboard. made me feel more stressful as i had to choose what to keep and what to throw away. threw out lots of out of date food. 

5.00 made dinner. spoke to family on the phone while cooking so didn't feel so tearful as usual. 

quiet evening. watched tv with kids 

11.00 took levothyroxine 75mcg, magnesium 200mg, sage leaf 50mg, candesartan 40mg. woke up frequently through the night with ocd thoughts. 

[Vonnegutjunky]

1 hour ago, thecowisback said:

letting go of thoughts is what i find the hardest, especially when they happen at night.

 

 

Same for me cow - 

i am in therapy - 

I was before the meds too 

people who have never had ocd don’t understand it, it is like being tortured. 

Its not just a thought, it’s the feelings that the thoughts bring with them- they are akin to terror at times for me - 

 

my doctor and and I are working on desensitization and reality testing with the thoughts - I hope eventually this will be effective in rewiring my brain-

 

i hate to be a downer about it but it’s reality - and the reality is the meds stopped the intrusive thinking for me -

 

but  I also  am now working with a doctor who understands ocd, so I think that’s really important to get someone who specializes in this disorder (something I did not have before) 

[thecowisback]

yes it's that terror that is the worst. when i was on the meds before i would feel that same flash of terror, then just tell myself it's just my ocd playing up and i could move on . now i'm stuck what feels like 24/7 on thoughts that i have no answer or solution to. 

i'm re-reading brain lock to see if that helps.

[puthappinessfirst]

3 hours ago, Vonnegutjunky said:

but  I also  am now working with a doctor who understands ocd, so I think that’s really important to get someone who specializes in this disorder (something I did not have before) 

 

A therapist who specializes in OCD and uses ERP is the "gold standard" for treating OCD. If a therapist focuses on things like mindfulness and not ERP, they can help for a bit (it's always nice to have someone to talk to), but it's not very effective for OCD intrusive thoughts. ACT is another great modality which I really enjoy and can be very effective as well.