Plshelp: olanzapine 5mg

[Plshelp]

1 hour ago, Madeleine said:

all I can do is share my story and tell you that eventually I got better. And I was worried I wouldn't so there is hope. I was very depressed at one time and antidepressants did help me get out of idepprwssion. In some cases they are needed. cbt  ie therapy helped me too  this site is mainly about helping people who want to taper but sometimes people have to reinstate or go up on the drugs until they feel better.  You said you are feeling  depressed and  so somehow you need to address the depression but I can't advise you how. Maybe someone else here can give you more or better advice.  However this is an online forum and we don't know you or see you in person so if you are feeling very depressed you might need to seek help for that from a person or professional who can help in person

 

M: I'm so glad that you got better, despite feeling hopeless and that you wouldn't recover. I'm so fortunate to have you writing to me. Thank you. 

 

You went onto antidepressants? Which one? How long did it take you before you started feeling better? 

 

I know exactly what you're saying about getting help with the depression. Idk how much longer I can endure this. I almost drove myself to the hospital tonight, but I was scared that they were going to admit me. I don't want to be locked up there again. It's so boring and I effing can't stand it. 

 

I'm scared b/c I don't have any thoughts in my head. My head is so blank. It's so uncomfortable. Plus all the other changes that have happened from the medication that's changed my body. I wish I had a magic wand to undo all this damage. Who would've known that taking an antipsychotic could do this? 

[Plshelp]

On 7/3/2017 at 10:14 AM, scallywag said:

Plshelp:  Do the best you can with the medication you have on hand.  If you're able to see your pDoc before your PCP, sometimes it can open up the conversation with a doctor to ask, "What is the harm of decreasing more slowly?"

 

A note about books: Calgary is a large city and the public library is likely to have Breggin's book in physical and electronic formats.  Borrowing e-books is a great way to get access to the information quickly and inexpensively.

Scallywag. I'm feeling pretty depressed and don't know what to do. I've been off the antipsychotic for 3 weeks now. I'm not seeing any improvements. I'm still experiencing the same symptoms from while I was on the medication. Except I'm extremely depressed. This isn't getting any better. Do you have any suggestions? Thx. 

[scallywag]

What non-drug coping skills are you applying to your situation?

Non-drug techniques to cope with emotional symptoms.

Change the channel - dealing with cognitive symptoms.

One member's topic -- How I am coping with depression.

 

Sometimes symptoms settle down; sometimes they come in waves and windows; sometimes they continue relatively the same. If you're in the second or third group of people, you get to develop more patience than you ever thought possible.

[Madeleine]

12 hours ago, Plshelp said:

 

 

You went onto antidepressants? Which one? How long did it take you before you started feeling better? 

 

I know exactly what you're saying about getting help with the depression. Idk how much longer I can endure this. I almost drove myself to the hospital tonight, but I was scared that they were going to admit me. I don't want to be locked up there again. It's so boring and I effing can't stand it. 

 

I'm scared b/c I don't have any thoughts in my head. My head is so blank. It's

I was on Zoloft and it took a few months to feel better. I'm on it again and tapering again and this time plan on going even slower at end. But the same drugs don't work for everyone.  Some people are able to work through their depression without drugs. Some not. Everyone is different. The main thing is do not give up,  there is no reason that you will not get better. The brain can heal--and there is no reason you won't get better. It may take a bit of time but believe that you will get better. This change in your brain is not permanent. 

[rupa]

Dear plhelp

As long as your sleep is good,you can cope with day time symptoms.

Please hang in there.

You will definitely get healed.

[Plshelp]

On 8/6/2017 at 4:19 PM, Madeleine said:

I was on Zoloft and it took a few months to feel better. I'm on it again and tapering again and this time plan on going even slower at end. But the same drugs don't work for everyone.  Some people are able to work through their depression without drugs. Some not. Everyone is different. The main thing is do not give up,  there is no reason that you will not get better. The brain can heal--and there is no reason you won't get better. It may take a bit of time but believe that you will get better. This change in your brain is not permanent. 

M:

I went to my gp and she prescribed me to take Cymbalta. I've heard it's not that great to take and another psychiatrist said to stop taking it, but I can't get in to see this other psychiatrist. I trust her more than my own psychiatrist. I'm waiting for a cancellation to get into see her, otherwise I'm staying on the Cymbalta and crossing my fingers that it helps me to start feeling better. My parents are at wits end. Mom can't stand to see me this low. She thinks that I'm lazy and not trying hard enough to do things. It's pretty upsetting. Idk how to get thru all this and to get thru each day. I don't feel well and just want all this pain to end. 

[Plshelp]

On 8/6/2017 at 8:55 AM, scallywag said:

What non-drug coping skills are you applying to your situation?

Non-drug techniques to cope with emotional symptoms.

Change the channel - dealing with cognitive symptoms.

One member's topic -- How I am coping with depression.

 

Sometimes symptoms settle down; sometimes they come in waves and windows; sometimes they continue relatively the same. If you're in the second or third group of people, you get to develop more patience than you ever thought possible.

Scallywag, 

Thanks for the post. I went to my gp and she put me on Cymbalta for now. I hope things improve. My patience has been waning for months. I'm feeling helpless. I don't feel good at all anymore. I don't know what's wrong with my brain, but I don't want to eat or drink fluids anymore and it's a struggle to get things down. I'm afraid I'm going to die. I'm forcing myself to do everything I can to stay alive. You can read my post above about the Cymbalta. 

Thx xx

[scallywag]

What dose of duloxetine (Cymbalta) was prescribed?  How many days have you taken it?

 

Please add the dose of Cymbalta and the date you started taking it to your signature.

Account Settings – Create or Edit a signature.

Edited August 11, 2017 by scallywag

[Plshelp]

45 minutes ago, scallywag said:

What dose of duloxetine (Cymbalta) was prescribed?  How many days have you taken it?

 

Please add the dose of Cymbalta and the date you started taking it to your signature.

Account Settings – Create or Edit a signature.

I started taking 30mg of duloxetine 2 days ago. I had diarrhoea this morning, nausea and a horrible dry mouth, so bad that I'm choking on my food to try and swallow it. I don't feel well at all. I am struggling to get food/fluids in my stomach. I think I'm going to stop taking it though, so idk about putting it in my signature. 

[Plshelp]

Idk what happened, but tonight after trying to eat dinner and choking on it to get it down, I felt a glimmer of peace. I was sitting on the swing with my mom and I felt totally at ease. The sick feeling in my stomach kinda dissipated. Weird. Plus I'm feeling hopeful after reading zyprexa withdrawal symptoms, as I thought I was losing my mind, but it explained it on this webpage kinda what to expect. http://mentalhealthdaily.com/2014/07/10/zyprexa-olanzapine-withdrawal-symptoms-how-long-do-they-last/

 

I haven't felt hopeful in almost a week. I was in utter despair. I doubt the Cymbalta is having an effect after 2 days, but I've decided not to take it anymore.  I'm going to see Dr. Mason(a new pdoc) tomorrow to talk with her about alternatives and maybe cbd oil instead? Maybe supplements? I was going to go see her for another antidepressant, but I don't think that I want to be on one. This dry cotton mouth thing is totally redic!

 

My mom was totally appalled tonight as she watched me gag down food. She screamed at me saying that I'm acting so strange and she thinks my psychosis is coming back. Maybe I need to order Dr. Peter Breggin's book on withdrawing from antipsychotics. Oooh. A mod suggested I borrow it from the library. Maybe if I get some motivation to do so, I'll do that. 

 

Thanks to everyone who posts comments and is trying to help me thru this horrendous battle. You are more valuable than words can express! <3

[Madeleine]

Good to hear that you have had a glimmer of feeling of peace.  See -- that shows you can get better. And you will!  

[powerback]

On ‎11‎/‎08‎/‎2017 at 7:17 AM, Plshelp said:

Idk what happened, but tonight after trying to eat dinner and choking on it to get it down, I felt a glimmer of peace. I was sitting on the swing with my mom and I felt totally at ease. The sick feeling in my stomach kinda dissipated. Weird. Plus I'm feeling hopeful after reading zyprexa withdrawal symptoms, as I thought I was losing my mind, but it explained it on this webpage kinda what to expect. http://mentalhealthdaily.com/2014/07/10/zyprexa-olanzapine-withdrawal-symptoms-how-long-do-they-last/

 

I haven't felt hopeful in almost a week. I was in utter despair. I doubt the Cymbalta is having an effect after 2 days, but I've decided not to take it anymore.  I'm going to see Dr. Mason(a new pdoc) tomorrow to talk with her about alternatives and maybe cbd oil instead? Maybe supplements? I was going to go see her for another antidepressant, but I don't think that I want to be on one. This dry cotton mouth thing is totally redic!

 

My mom was totally appalled tonight as she watched me gag down food. She screamed at me saying that I'm acting so strange and she thinks my psychosis is coming back. Maybe I need to order Dr. Peter Breggin's book on withdrawing from antipsychotics. Oooh. A mod suggested I borrow it from the library. Maybe if I get some motivation to do so, I'll do that. 

 

Thanks to everyone who posts comments and is trying to help me thru this horrendous battle. You are more valuable than words can express! <3

I recommend sugar free gum for the cotton mouth .its helped me loads since I've been on the poison .the other week I was like jim carey in me my self and Irene ,put it in to youtube very funny  I thought  ..

PB

[Plshelp]

19 hours ago, Madeleine said:

Good to hear that you have had a glimmer of feeling of peace.  See -- that shows you can get better. And you will!  

Idk Madeline. I'm scared that these meds have permanently changed the chemistry of my brain. Somehow I feel that to be true. 

[Plshelp]

19 hours ago, powerback said:

I recommend sugar free gum for the cotton mouth .its helped me loads since I've been on the poison .the other week I was like jim carey in me my self and Irene ,put it in to youtube very funny  I thought  ..

PB

Thanks for the suggestion PB. I've stopped taking the Cymbalta. No more of that for me. What do you mean you were like Jim Carrey? 

[powerback]

2 hours ago, Plshelp said:

Thanks for the suggestion PB. I've stopped taking the Cymbalta. No more of that for me. What do you mean you were like Jim Carrey? 

there's a clip of him in a movie he had cotton mouth after taking meds . 

[Madeleine]

On 2017-08-14 at 0:54 PM, Plshelp said:

Idk Madeline. I'm scared that these meds have permanently changed the chemistry of my brain. Somehow I feel that to be true. 

You said it yourself it's only  a feeling ; it's not a fact that you will be in the current state forever.  Your negative  thought that you won't get better creates a subjective feeling. Look at the facts and supporting evidence that you can improve:

-other people improved 

-other people who thought they wouldn't get better improved

-people are telling you it's possible and likely you will improve

 

 

 

[ang]

On 06/08/2017 at 2:56 AM, Plshelp said:

I feel like there's something really wrong with me. 

 

I don't feel like eating or drinking fluids ever. I feel like I'm forcing myself to do everything. Like to even eat to stay alive. I feel really down and depressed and just feel like life isn't worth living and that I just want to die. But I don't want to die. I want to be better and not living like this. 

I am glad you decided not to try yet another medication.  Every time you add, take away, change, it throws your brain off balance.

 

Keep reading everything you can on how others feel getting of the antipsychotics.

 

I felt everything you are feeling, hang in there, it does pass.

 

 

[Marsha]

Hi plshelp. Yep it gets better. It really does get better. Like ang said,  hang in there, it will pass. 

[Plshelp]

On 7/30/2017 at 0:15 PM, Madeleine said:

Have you read Andy's story in Success Stories. He tapered off zyprexa/olanzapine and he describes his story and others on antipsychotics describe their's too: 

 

M: yes, I have read Andy's success story. Very fortunate to have recovered. I wish I was that lucky as well. I don't think I'm going to heal though. I have too many physical alterations that have happened from the medications. 

[Plshelp]

Ugh. This is my new life post meds:

 

My usual first wake up time is now 5am. I do this everyday. Wake up after a vivid dream, drenched in sweat, tummy gurgling, flatulence. Then I go back to sleep until 7, same thing happens, then doze back to sleep until 9 when I wake up. All I think about when I wake is how much my life sucks, how disabled I am, mentally, physically and emotionally, how my personality is gone, how I have no thoughts in my head and how the days are so long. Then I get up, after lying in bed for 2 hours. Sometimes I fall back asleep until 1030am. Sometimes not. (I don't want to get up for a long time, b/c the days are so long if I do). Then I get up around 11, tell myself to go pee. Sometimes I do a number 2, not always, make a tea, maybe something to eat, even though I don't feel thirsty or hungry. Then I play games with mom on her iPad. Then after I just follow her around the house (b/c I don't know what else to do with myself) until supper, help her make supper. Then we eat. Do dishes. Watch tv all night and sometimes play on her iPad again. Text ppl that are also on antipsychotics, or write to those who have recovered. Go to bed and the same thing repeats over and over again everyday. Throw in an occasional shower, farmers market, occasional visit to a friend's place, a movie with a friend, trip to Costco and playing bingo, but everything else stays the same. Kinda like a template of my life. I hate it. So much. I've been having a few good days, which is helping to break up the despair, but then the despair comes back. It keeps coming back. Ugh. Idk how I'm supposed to entertain myself for the rest of my life like this. It's so boring and awful. I hate that my mind is blank and that these drugs have destroyed me-physically, emotionally, mentally and sexually. 

[Bokart]

I've been there... think it was 2016 spring, and I desperately searched for a solution... Feb 2016 I joined this forum and getting off the drugs was everything that was on my mind.

 

Every symptom, I was aware, even to the point they were one of the main themes in my thinking. I wanted to get off, I wanted to sleep, I tried so many nutritional products and none of them made any difference.

 

So I yielded to the 10% taper method after some internal fight between wanting to instantly get better and not wanting to suffer the withdrawals ever again. Decided risk was not worth it... and when the tapering started 1st of June I was so happy. It was all I needed. I slept better. I focused on other things & let the taper & all involved with it to go into the background. And it was worth it. To be honest at this point my focus was just games because I didn't have motivation for much else, and so it had to be.

 

I started studying, which pushed tapering and all these medicine related things even more to the background. My new field of study was perfect for me. I even got some motivation to get out of bed, which was so long so unbearably hard - mind you it wasn't easy and wouldn't get better until maybe 6 months. My first studying year was successful & the environment I lived in was reasonably conflict-free. A good recipe for healing to occur.

I tell this story because everything I have achieved took time. Letting my mind go off of medicine/withdrawal world  and start being centering something else took many months/ over half a year. Motivation took many months, having an easier time to get out of bed took many, many months (went hand in hand with motivation).

 

Don't worry you'll get there It just takes some time.

[Plshelp]

How can you tell the difference between withdrawal symptoms or if you're experiencing windows and waves? 

 

This webpage (http://mentalhealthdaily.com/2014/07/10/zyprexa-olanzapine-withdrawal-symptoms-how-long-do-they-last/) states that mood swings are withdrawals. I've been having times where I feel more positive, hopeful and connected in my body. Then I relapse into a crushing despair combined with suicidal ideation. 

 

Is that a window/wave? Or am I experiencing discontinuation syndrome? 

 

Thanks

[baroquep]

Hi Plshelp, I did a quick google search of "can the brain recover from antipsychotics surviving antidepressants" and these threads came up, perhaps it will give you some much needed hope that things will eventually recover ... even when it doesn't feel like anything is going to change.  

 

 

[Plshelp]

5 hours ago, baroquep said:

Hi Plshelp, I did a quick google search of "can the brain recover from antipsychotics surviving antidepressants" and these threads came up, perhaps it will give you some much needed hope that things will eventually recover ... even when it doesn't feel like anything is going to change.  

 

 

Baroquep, have you read these 2 stories? Both these ppl were on the antipsychotics for a short time. I read the one about schizor a long time ago. They partially recovered and then relapsed back into depression and hopelessness. They are not doing well now. But thanks for trying.

 

It's really disheartening, not to be able to read more recovery stories, but I think it's b/c those ppl recover and never have to come to these sites. Or... Maybe the ppl who are damaged commit suicide b/c they can't handle this torment anymore. 

 

I feel really hopeless and have been planning on what to do to escape this life. Everyday is so hard, with my limited functioning. I used to be a highly functional member of society with a huge personality and was the life of the party. I'm trying to hold on and just get thru each day and not look too fat into the future. 

 

Now I feel like a retarded child. I can't really use my brain, I struggle to shower, I follow my mom around the house everyday, b/c I don't know what else to do with myself. 

[baroquep]

Sorry PlsHelp,

 

I guess I should have taken the time to read through the threads before citing ... my mistake and one that I won't make again.  I was trying to give you hope and didn't realize that Schizor had relapsed back into depression, my apologies.  

 

Will share with you that I honestly do believe that most if not all people do get better after withdrawing from psychiatric drugs.  It's up to us to keep the hope alive and not jump on the bandwagon that nothing is going to help.  When we've convinced ourselves that things will never get better, we oftentimes miss the signs that things are in fact progressing forward.

 

I had a friend that was perpetually pessimistic and couldn't see the forest through the trees because she refused to see that things can and do change, often when we least expect it, and she missed the small opportunities to see that she was in fact making progress and therefore unable to relish and enjoy the small step forward.

 

Perhaps journalling might help you make sense of your emotions.  Have you read the link on Neuro-emotions?  We really do have to try to keep hope alive and that means taking the steps to do something different, challenge our thoughts or take a risk.  If we sit in the negative emotions and run with them, like my friend, you may miss it when things are getting better.  Often in withdrawal it is two steps forward one step back but we have to learn to appreciate that one step forward that we can hang onto.

I'll attach a couple of links that might help you find a technique to incorporate into your day that just might make things a little easier.  I wish I did have a success story to post for you, but unfortunately those are the only two threads that came up when I searched.  Surviving Antidepressants does have a page on success stories, numerous stories, and withdrawal from anti-psychotics is a similar process and perhaps you might be able to find a little hope by reading them.

Wishing you a couple of steps forward even if it means you have to take a step back every now and again.  You weren't on these drugs for very long and it sounds like you are young, both of those factors work in your favour.  Please don't give up hope, half of the battle is keeping a positive outlook knowing that things do get better.   

Neuro Emotions

"Change the channel" -- dealing with cognitive symptoms

Change cognitive framing - Redirect - Another Way
Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT) for anxiety, depression  

 

Journalling - Therapeutic Writing & Health Benefits
 

Non-drug techniques to cope with emotional symptoms

Claire Weekes' Method of Recovering from a Sensitized Nervous System

 

Success Stories Recovery from Withdrawal

Edited September 4, 2017 by baroquep

[MollyN]

6 hours ago, Plshelp said:

I've been having times where I feel more positive, hopeful and connected in my body. 

 

 

 

Hi plshelp, oh my goodness, this is fantastic news!! Yes, this is a window and a wonderful sign of progress and healing. Sure it doesn't last long and the wave afterward comes so hot and heavy that it almost seems to wipe out any positives, but when you can look back in a year's time, you'll recognise it for what it is: healing.

 

You're doing so well, hanging on in there, even though life isn't how you imagined it right now; hanging out with mum and playing games on the ipad (you and all the rest of us with more than 1 trillion candy crush games played ). But while you're resting, your brain is doing what brains do (even though you don't really trust that process right now), the regeneration will come.

 

Maybe, you could start to reframe this time in your life, not as the 'failure' stage, but the 'wisdom gaining' stage, or the 'setting the stage for increased patience, empathy and self-love' stage.  It's like all the folks that start building a business from scratch and they describe the times when the spreadsheets were dripping red and they were sleeping on their sister's floor and then later, the boom times, they're all the sweeter for the struggle.

 

Imagine what you'll be able to do, and with what gratitude and mindfulness of the sweet joy of it, when you are able to enjoy even the most simple of tasks and emotions. 

 

Big hugs xxx mollyn

 

 

 

 

[TryingToHoldOn]

I feel your pain.  I was on Latuda (AP) for 5.5 months and also sertraline for about 2 years.  I'm definitely in WD from the AD and I suspect the latuda as well.  I didn't cold turkey per se, but weaned over a course of 4wks for the AD and 6 wks for the latuda.  I jumped off at 25mg (AD) and 20mg (latuda) - instructed by my NP.  I'm 5 months off meds and in holy hell!

 

I hope you have better days to come!

 

 

[Plshelp]

On 05/09/2017 at 0:53 PM, TryingToHoldOn said:

I feel your pain.  I was on Latuda (AP) for 5.5 months and also sertraline for about 2 years.  I'm definitely in WD from the AD and I suspect the latuda as well.  I didn't cold turkey per se, but weaned over a course of 4wks for the AD and 6 wks for the latuda.  I jumped off at 25mg (AD) and 20mg (latuda) - instructed by my NP.  I'm 5 months off meds and in holy hell!

 

I hope you have better days to come!

 

 

Trying to hold on. 

 

Why are you in hell? Do you have suicidal thoughts daily also? I have crushing depression and despair with some anxiety and just feel like I'm dying. Then for a brief period of a couple hours, to maybe a day, I start feeling a little less crappy and calm. I was on Latuda briefly. 

 

Thank you so much for writing me. 

[Marsha]

Hi Plshelp. I'm here too still. Eat nutritious food, rest, exercise a bit if you can. These things are all helpful. Try to do things that help you build up your self esteem. Relish those periods when you feel positive thoughts. They will become more and more frequent. Try not to let your symptoms take you down the rabbit hole of despair. Yep. I was on latuda too. 

[Plshelp]

So, for months I've been feeling like one day feels like the time span of a whole week of my life. I knew something was totally messed up with my perception of time. I didn't know why. Well, guess what... I found the answer!

 

Dopamine is the main neurotransmitter involved in time processing. Dopamine agonists – compounds that activate dopamine receptors – tend to speed up our perception of time, which passes more quickly. This is also the case for certain drugs, such as cocaine, which enhances the effect of dopamine. On the contrary, the NEUROLEPTICS used to treat schizophrenia inhibit its effect, creating the impression that time is passing more slowly.

 

https://www.theguardian.com/science/2013/jan/01/psychology-time-perception-awareness-research

 

DOES ANYONE ELSE FEEL LIKE THIS??? I think it's a combo of having no thoughts in my head and depleted dopamine. 

[Martina23]

When I took for one day Zyprexa, I also felt somewhat slowly. It was scary. I felt so tired, I couldnt even get out of the bed, I was sure that if I continue taking it, I cannot take care of my children, I felt as if someone hit me with the hammer, something was pushing me to the ground, luckily there came hospital psychologist and said it can not be, so they took it away and I started to feel better.

[Plshelp]

20 hours ago, Martina23 said:

When I took for one day Zyprexa, I also felt somewhat slowly. It was scary. I felt so tired, I couldnt even get out of the bed, I was sure that if I continue taking it, I cannot take care of my children, I felt as if someone hit me with the hammer, something was pushing me to the ground, luckily there came hospital psychologist and said it can not be, so they took it away and I started to feel better.

Martina, 

 

You only took it one day? Omg. You're so lucky. I wish I was as fortunate as you. What did he put you on instead? 

[Plshelp]

On 08/09/2017 at 6:50 AM, Marsha said:

Hi Plshelp. I'm here too still. Eat nutritious food, rest, exercise a bit if you can. These things are all helpful. Try to do things that help you build up your self esteem. Relish those periods when you feel positive thoughts. They will become more and more frequent. Try not to let your symptoms take you down the rabbit hole of despair. Yep. I was on latuda too. 

Marsha, 

I'm forcing myself to eat as much as I can and drink as much as I can. I rest as best as I can also. I don't exercise as I don't have the motivation. I'm pushing myself everyday to just function by getting out of bed, eating, playing some computer games, helping to make dinner and watching tv. That's all I can do. It's so devastating living like this. I'm trying to mentally stay afloat. It's difficult. You must be in a much better place than me. You're lucky. 

[Plshelp]

On 04/09/2017 at 6:28 PM, MollyN said:

Hi plshelp, oh my goodness, this is fantastic news!! Yes, this is a window and a wonderful sign of progress and healing. Sure it doesn't last long and the wave afterward comes so hot and heavy that it almost seems to wipe out any positives, but when you can look back in a year's time, you'll recognise it for what it is: healing.

 

You're doing so well, hanging on in there, even though life isn't how you imagined it right now; hanging out with mum and playing games on the ipad (you and all the rest of us with more than 1 trillion candy crush games played ). But while you're resting, your brain is doing what brains do (even though you don't really trust that process right now), the regeneration will come.

 

Maybe, you could start to reframe this time in your life, not as the 'failure' stage, but the 'wisdom gaining' stage, or the 'setting the stage for increased patience, empathy and self-love' stage.  It's like all the folks that start building a business from scratch and they describe the times when the spreadsheets were dripping red and they were sleeping on their sister's floor and then later, the boom times, they're all the sweeter for the struggle.

 

Imagine what you'll be able to do, and with what gratitude and mindfulness of the sweet joy of it, when you are able to enjoy even the most simple of tasks and emotions. 

 

Big hugs xxx mollyn

 

 

 

 

Molly. 

Idk if they're windows, or if they're just a mood swing. 

 

I'm trying to acknowledge my daily accomplishments by keeping track of it on my phone calendar. But I don't get very far at all. I'm struggling to function. This is not living. This is living in effing hell. I long to be living amongst the living, but it's not happening. 

 

I wish I could enjoy things and feel emotions, but I can't. Antipsychotics numb you. Make you a drooling, tv watching zombie. 

 

This is not how my life was supposed to turn out. I hope your life is grand. 

[Martina23]

4 hours ago, Plshelp said:

Martina, 

 

You only took it one day? Omg. You're so lucky. I wish I was as fortunate as you. What did he put you on instead? 

Nothing, I had PGAD and they gave me already previously antidepressant and lyrica and wanted to add Zyprexa “to just make that dopamine lower“ (by me it had even nothing with dopamine I got PGAD after caesarian delivery after having twins) and the psychologist saw this was making me to living zombie so he ordered to stop it.

[Plshelp]

5 hours ago, Martina23 said:

Nothing, I had PGAD and they gave me already previously antidepressant and lyrica and wanted to add Zyprexa “to just make that dopamine lower“ (by me it had even nothing with dopamine I got PGAD after caesarian delivery after having twins) and the psychologist saw this was making me to living zombie so he ordered to stop it.

I wish I had been that lucky. My entire life is destroyed b/c of antipsychotics.