Scorpio: Will this ever end?

[Scorpio]

Hi flowers

good news the wave is easing a little for you and that you have eaten. Bad news you still don’t have a definitive answer from your doctor. That’s a long wait to find out if you need help and a rotten pain to suffer just to add to the misery of a wave. It’s sounding as though you might not make it home. I’m so sorry if that is the case, can you rearrange the dates before Christmas. 

I was able to eat from yesterday thank goodness and again today, I’ve been upright since yesterday not doing a lot but trying. Anxiety is still the worst symptom for me then the nausea. Lots of fatigue as well but hopefully it will get better it would be so nice to think I might get a window, after five months now it would be the lift I need to keep going. 

We have celebrity get me out of here since last night so compulsive viewing for 3 weeks. 

Look after yourself and fingers crossed everything eases for you. 

Love

scorpio

[Flowers]

Hi Scorpio

 

Thanks for visiting me on my thread.

 

How are things with you? Are you still suffering badly with anxiety? Have you managed to get out this week? I am really sending positive vibes over to you so you can get a nice window and a break from all this.

 

My trip to Portsmouth is postponed but hopefully we will get over soon. Will have to do my shopping online instead! 

 

Lots of love and hugs

 

Flowers xxx 

[Scorpio]

Hi flowers

i hope you are feeling better and the drugs are doing their job. Thank you for the positive vibes, anxiety still has me by the throat but eased a little. Had Jude yesterday and Tuesday afternoon so luckily coped. Sainsbury’s today which, as you know, when in a bad wave is virtually impossible to do, so slight improvement. Tomorrow I am keeping everything crossed to go to Chichester for some shopping. It’s Black Friday so could well be manic but as long as I can get there I will be happy. 

Such a shame you couldn’t make it home but much more important that you give yourself time to recover from the uti and the wave. It’s generally 72 hours before any sign of relief so keep taking the tablets   I’ve done a lot of my shopping online this year but some things I have to get from the shops so hopefully tomorrow I will accomplish it. Gunwharf has its Christmas lights up - so pretty - so try and rebook before they come down again. 

Thinking of you 

‘love scorpio 

 

[Flowers]

Hi Scorpio

 

It sounds like you may be a little better especially if you are thinking about going to Chichester. I really hope you make it. I used to love shopping in Chichester - the shops and atmosphere will be wonderful. 

 

I am hoping to get back asap but it will depend on whether I have sunk into another wave by then!! At the moment my WD symptoms are not so bad. Grrrhhhh!

 

You did well to look after Jude this week - another sign of improvement? I really hope things are on the turn for you. 

 

I bet Gunwharf looks wonderful  - we were going to stay in an apartment near there overlooking the harbour. All is not lost as we can rebook. 

 

Thanks for the tip re the AB's not working for 72 hours.  Maybe tomorrow I will see more of an improvement.

 

Are you enjoying the Jungle tv programme?

 

Thinking of you too.

 

Hugs from Flowers xxx

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Scorpio]

Hi flowers

how are feeling, any improvement yet, I hope so and a window is also opening wide and long for you. The apartment you booked  for coming home sounds lovely and I hope you can rebook.

Well yesterday was a better today and as usual I think I will stay that way and start to make plans then this morning back to the horrible anxiety again but very few other side effects. Unfortunately the anxiety is the one thing I find hardest to cope with. The physical symptoms I can normally manage to endure. But I pushed on and made it to Chichester.  I can’t say Black Friday made much of an impact there. It was nice to be out but I struggled   I think we were out for three hours got home and Luisa and Jude were waiting for us so ended up a busy day. Anxiety not settling at all so will have to keep fingers crossed tomorrow gets better. 

Love

scorpio

[Flowers]

Hi Scorpio

 

That is fantastic news! I know you are still suffering but you went to Chichester even if you struggled. There used to be a fantastic shop called Homesense around there. I think it is something to do with TK Maxx.

 

I  know exactly what you mean with making plans when feeling well and then it all goes pearshaped!  At least you had some company when you got home with Luisa and Jude waiting for you.

 

I find it so hard to not overdo things when I feel better as I want to make up for all the things I have missed in a wave!  I suppose we just have to take one day at a time and not get too upset if we get a bad day. It is a good sign that you are feeling better on some days. You will get there - it just takes so long doesn't it?

 

Anxiety is just awful. I also find the physical symptoms easier to cope with than the mental ones. I am sorry the anxiety is not easing off for you tonight. Do you think today may have been a bit too stimulating for you? Sometimes I suffer if I go out in crowded places.

 

I did feel a bit better today but am still taking it easy. I have a horrible dragging feeling in my lower abdomen and am very tired and sleepy.  I think the burning is getting better.  Just don't want to be on my feet for too long or the pain gets worse. I did manage to make dinner tonight for us and I ate well.  I am feeling a little strange but think it is the antibiotics - they always make me feel out of sorts.

 

I bet the shops will be crazy tomorrow if the Black Friday deals continue then. I have been shopping online today and found a few bargains for Christmas presents. There is so much more available in the UK than here.  If we can't get back to UK before Christmas I think we may go down to Gibraltar to do some Christmas shopping there - it takes around 2 hours so we have an overnight stay.  We can go on the spur of the moment too if I feel up to it.

 

This all makes me so sad sometimes - I used to love to travel anywhere. But it is what it is and we just have to make the best of it.

 

Lots of love

 

Flowers xxx

 

 

 

 

[Scorpio]

Hi flowers

it is such a shame you became ill just when you were about to come home. I must admit I have done a lot of online shopping this Christmas but it’s also cheaper. I don’t know homesense. I’ll google it and see if it’s still there. Can you get amazon over there. 

Just give it time to let the a/bs work properly, your body is obviously saying rest and that’s what you need to do. I can’t take many a.bs at all anymore I get bad reactions to them. The last successful one gave me the worst taste in my mouth the whole time I was on them. I think they can make you feel really unwell. Hope your course isn’t for too long. 

A short trip to Gibraltar sounds like a lovely idea. I’m the same as you I loved traveling and visiting different places and of course the sun and sand. I long for the day when I feel normal and can look forward to planning trips again. Tony has booked a holiday for us in Mauritius in April, I keep trying not to worry about it and just pray I will be better by then. 

If it’s any consolation you haven’t missed many bargains in Chichester this weekend. 

Keep resting let everything get better and your window open more. Then you can think about Gibraltar or home. 

Lots of love

scorpio

[Flowers]

1 hour ago, Scorpio said:

Hi flowers

it is such a shame you became ill just when you were about to come home. I must admit I have done a lot of online shopping this Christmas but it’s also cheaper. I don’t know homesense. I’ll google it and see if it’s still there. Can you get amazon over there. 

Just give it time to let the a/bs work properly, your body is obviously saying rest and that’s what you need to do. I can’t take many a.bs at all anymore I get bad reactions to them. The last successful one gave me the worst taste in my mouth the whole time I was on them. I think they can make you feel really unwell. Hope your course isn’t for too long. 

A short trip to Gibraltar sounds like a lovely idea. I’m the same as you I loved traveling and visiting different places and of course the sun and sand. I long for the day when I feel normal and can look forward to planning trips again. Tony has booked a holiday for us in Mauritius in April, I keep trying not to worry about it and just pray I will be better by then. 

If it’s any consolation you haven’t missed many bargains in Chichester this weekend. 

Keep resting let everything get better and your window open more. Then you can think about Gibraltar or home. 

Lots of love

scorpio

Hi Scorpio

 

I know - I am not going to plan any trips away until the last minute in future!  I have spent nearly all day on Amazon ordering online!  Should keep our postman busy the next couple of weeks!

 

I am the same as you and don't seem to be able to tolerate meds anymore. I am really scared to take anything now and AB's always make me feel strange. I've got to be on these for 10 days until I see my Dr for a check up. As long as I can keep eating it isn't too bad. Luckily nausea is not around at the moment.

 

April is a long time away yet - a holiday might just do you good by then. Mauritius is beautiful. I worry about any commitments I have at the moment - even if it is just meeting friends. Try not to worry about your trip though as it will make you worse. Just put it to the back of your mind for now.

 

Hope you have a good night and wake up feeling less anxious tomorrow.

 

Love Flowers xxx

 

 

[Scorpio]

Hi flowers

hope today shows some improvement and you are a bit better. Keep resting and let yoyr body heal. Hopefully you are still eating and soon you will feel like being out and about again. 

We went to Southampton this morning, oh I hate that place and it was very busy. I woke to more anxiety but for my husbands sake I pushed through. Then this afternoon my daughter and grandson came in wanting me to go to Asda superstore- hell on Earth.   I think virtually every baby was crying every child shouting or screaming and parents all at the end of their tethers. My grandson decided to join in with his own one year old set of Tantrums. Back home now with ears ringing anxiety high and even if able I am going nowhere tomorrow if possible will do some cleaning but you know what happens when we make plans. 

Love

scorpio

[Flowers]

Hi Scorpio

 

I do not know how you managed to go to Southampton and then Asda superstore on top of that! I would have had to get out of Asda with all the children screaming. I am quite sensitive to loud noises and crowded places now. But at least you got out and it was lovely for you to do it for your husband. Probably makes him feel better if he can see you doing normal things.

 

I think you deserve a rest tomorrow so I hope you will curl up with a book after your cleaning. I saw a picture on FB of Gunwharf Christmas Lights and they looked so pretty. It looked like reindeer along the canal. I so wish I was there having fish and chips for supper tonight.

 

I didn't have a very good nights sleep last night as our dogs were barking and restless. We live quite remotely so that always puts us on guard in case there are undesirable people about. No sign of anybody or anything though. Got up and felt yuck but got dressed and did some pottering and light chores. This afternoon went out for a drive in the car with my husband to feed the feral cats and think I am feeling much better today. I know it's the dreaded AB's making me feel so weird so will be glad when I have finished them.  I was thinking of Frogie today who had several different courses recently and I don't know how she coped.

 

I have eaten well again today so am trying to get myself fit. Are you eating a little more recently? There must be so many goodies in the shops right now to tempt you. I would love a mince pie right now!

 

You have done so well these last couple of days - taking a step forward into the world again. 

 

Love from Flowers xxx

 

 

 

 

[Scorpio]

Hi flowers

 

good to hear you got out yesterday and feeling a little better. Just keep taking it easy while on the a/bs then you should be ready to take on the world again. 

I think yesterday was too much, I knew I was pushing it as felt pretty rotten in the morning. Now paying for it, back to square one, early anxiety waking, nausea, grumbling stomach, screaming ears again. Feeling very sorry for myself and back to being frightened. Five months I know is not long but it seems like this has been an eternity of feeling horrible. I just wish for a proper window where my confidence and energy come back. 

I totally understand being disturbed at night when the dogs are restless , especially being in a remote area, night time always brings us more fear than the day when you can see what’s going on. 

I can eat until like today again the nausea gets me and I find it very hard.  I still haven’t managed to regain any of the lost weight. I am not sure if it’s ok to eat sugary foods I have done occasionally but bit bothered will make me worse. I’m drinking a mug of peppermint tea which is disgusting. 

Hope you wake up to feeling even better today, not long before your a/bs are finished flowers and then you can hopefully make plans for home or Gibraltar. Whichever it will be lovely for you to have a few days away. 

Love

scorpio

[Flowers]

Hi Scorpio

 

I am so sorry that you have had this set back after yesterday.  I suppose it is just feeling your way  and getting to know how much you can and can't do. The shops and all the stimulation must have been too much to make you feel so bad today. I know it is such a busy time of year and part of the fun for me used to be going shopping and getting everything ready.  If I can manage to get out to shops now  I try to have a quiet day before and after.  I hope you don't feel too disheartened - it is just a little hiccup on the road to healing. Have a good rest and hopefully things will settle and you will feel better.

 

Just thought I would mention that 'triggers' for me are bright lights, crowds and noise. I guess this sums up Christmas!! I hope you have started to feel better this evening and that the nausea subsided and you ate something.

 

Love and hugs

 

Flowers xxx

 

 

[JS11]

Hi Scorpio,

Just really quickly wanted to say, AltoStrata posted on an elimination or exclusion diet for food sensitivity.  Many of the symptoms seemed to be like yours.  Could that be part of your issue?  

I don't know how to forward it to you but perhaps if you do a search.  I think it was just today.

 

I am going to drink some hot lemon water with honey to try and combat this beastly cold or whatever it is.  Have some messages to return but the brain, she is not so good.  Not being a Neandrathal mouth breather might help!

 

Hope You improve with each passing minute....

take care,

JS11

[Scorpio]

Help, symptoms seem to be increasing. Five months on 1mg and although some better days no real window. The last couple of days everything has ramped up again. I also am now being back to broken nights with anxiety, nausea and trembling joining in. Eye twitching too. 

I haven’t had the trembling before.  I take about 1mg melatonin at night which has always helped but that’s not helped the last couple of nights. 

i don’t know which way to turn as I had a bad time of lexapro/cipralex the whole time on it but don’t want to destabilise myself further by upping or lowering dose. Supplements including magnesium react.

[coldturkmama]

wish I had something encouraging to say. It can get worse and it sucks but it will get better too. Hold on.

[Scorpio]

Hi coldturkmama

thankyou for responding 

[Scorpio]

Hi bubble 

i think you are going through a bad time but if any other moderators are reading this can someone please give me some advice 

[AliG]

Hi Scorpio. I'm sorry to hear that you're not doing so well. Have you had any other changes lately that you can recall ~ any OTC drugs? Antibiotics? Has anything else in your routine changed? Any added supplements or even added stress?

[Scorpio]

Hello AliG

thank you for coming back to me. Monday was the worst day I have had since this began but Tuesday I woke calm and much better, Wednesday woke at 6 which was back to how I had been but the day was full of my main symptoms anxiety, nausea and tinnitus.  This morning again about 6 but full anxiety raging then nausea and tinnitus. The face burning only seems to appear when I wake up and then goes again. It is not constant. This morning I did make it outside the door to get food shopping so better in that respect and I have had to care for my grandson yesterday afternoon and because he has become unwell had to rush and collect him from nursery at 1.30 today. I think if anything he manages to take my mind off things but obviously at 1 year old they are demanding. 

 

I haven’t done anything different at all, not changed a thing, I know I go up and down like a yo-yo but this was different. The anxiety has been horrible since first on lexapro but it has become stronger again. I am just going through a scared phase that my poor brain is not going to recover. I know it takes time and I try to be patient but still waiting for a proper window which I did get before w/d although would go back into a smaller wave. 

 

[Scorpio]

Hello AliG

sorry but I’m not sure if you saw my reply. Today once again I managed to sleep to 6 but woken with the same holy trinity of symptoms. The anxiety is once again very high and debilitating. If you can give me any thoughts on this I would really appreciate it. 

 

[RealMe]

Hi Scorpio,

I am sorry to see that you are suffering from anxiety, tinnitus and other symptoms.  I have these symptoms also, and they are hard to bear.  I admire that you are able to care for your grandchild.  I couldn't tell from your signature whether or not you are still taking diazepam.  Years ago I took Valium for anxiety, but it just exacerbated it.  Today I took a short walk in the sunshine.  I am a little better than yesterday.  Hope you are feeling better or soon will be.

[Scorpio]

Hello RealMe

im so sorry your are having such a hard time. I have just read your thread and you are amazing going to work and the gym whilst going through this horrible time. 

 

My tinnitus started within a couple of months of starting lexapro. The Doctors refused to admit it was drug based but when I used to go through windows it would virtually vanish. Since w/d it has ramped up considerably but if I get a good day - not many- the tinnitus becomes almost silent. So fingers crossed as we overcome the W/d we will lose the tinnitus.  Mine is ships whistles I don’t know what you hear. The best thing is to  try not to focus on it easier said than done I know. 

 

I was given diazepam again when put on lexapro due to it causing me terrible anxiety, something that hadn’t ever been a problem. I took it very occasionally merely to escape the agony but I don’t take it at all and haven’t done for about 18 months. It scares me and only got relief for a couple of hours. 

 

The worst symptoms I have are the anxiety which debilitates  me completely and nausea and tinnitus. I did have the horrible depression at the beginning of w/d but it has eased although comes back when I’m having really bad days. 

 

I think my grandchild keeps me going, wears me out, but at one year he is such a joy. I love him to bits. I see you also have grandchildren so you know exactly how I feel. Do you see your grandchildren a lot?  I agree with you if you can force yourself out the door it does help. I have the same awful dread when I open my eyes and have to drag myself up, it is so scary. You are in the right place here for support. Please feel free to chat to me anytime. I know how you feel and I sympathise. 

[AliG]

Hi Scorpio,

 

On 11/26/2017 at 4:43 AM, Scorpio said:

 

We went to Southampton this morning, oh I hate that place and it was very busy. I woke to more anxiety but for my husbands sake I pushed through. Then this afternoon my daughter and grandson came in wanting me to go to Asda superstore- hell on Earth.   I think virtually every baby was crying every child shouting or screaming and parents all at the end of their tethers. My grandson decided to join in with his own one year old set of Tantrums. Back home now with ears ringing anxiety high and even if able I am going nowhere tomorrow if possible will do some cleaning but you know what happens when we make plans

 

Oh my. It sounds like you went through a lot of disturbance that even a non W/D person may struggle with under those particular circumstances, let alone a person struggling through withdrawal. Kudos to you ~ for keeping it together. It could stress anyone, but for those that are somewhat challenged, it could definitely feel like too much. It sounds like you may have pushed yourself too far under extreme circumstances.

 

Can I just say that my heart rate went up even reading this, let alone living through it. To me, this is more than enough to set you back and possibly even cause a wave. I think this is what happened.

 

Have you thought about updosing? I'm sure you have, but you also seem to have a history of sensitization ~ Is that correct? Do you feel like 1 drop is too much or not enough? What are your symptoms after taking it?

 

Perhaps, if you could keep some notes over the next week on your symptoms ~ it may help to identify some causes. Sometimes, however, there is no real answer but time.

Ali

[Scorpio]

Hi alig

thank you so much for replying. I think as you say it is sometimes too much of a good thing that exacerbates the symptoms.  It is the anxiety that is by far the worst symptom. I take the 1mg of lexapro when I get up but I don’t think it raises the symptoms as they are already there when I wake. 

 

I did have a really bad time on  lexapro so I’m really scared about updosing any more. It is such a hard situation, in hell like this or more hell if I go up or down. To make matters worse both my husband and I have gone down with my grandsons cold and yesterday he managed to eat a washing detergent gel capsule so was rushed to hospital. Fortunately he vomited most of it back but yesterday was truly frightening so as you can imagine with illness and fear today is yet another horrible day. 

 

I think my symptoms are are very erratic, I can go through hell for a few hours then not too bad, then hell again and if lucky the evenings tend to be calmer. My sleep, although I take 1mg melatonin, has improved. Very little difficulty going to sleep and unless going through a really bad day don’t wake until 6/6.30. The nausea also comes and goes. My tinnitus when I am feeling calmer is almost gone. Even on bad days it is only in one ear now. 

 

I think as you say it is time and the hope that it will settle. Just to see a proper window would give me hope but unfortunately that hasn’t happened.  From your own experience and the people you have helped do you think it is possible for me to balance and get some stability. I know that’s a rotten question but just scared. 

[AliG]

I do think it is possible to get that balance and stability and just because you haven't had a proper window yet doesn't mean that you won't in the future.

Edited December 3, 2017 by AliG

[Scorpio]

hi alig

 

im so confused I really don’t know what to do. Going lower I think would be bad as I was in a bad way when I came onto this site but updosing also frightens me as it has been over five months since taking 1mg and worrying it might make me even worse.  As you mentioned I am sensitive to everything. Can’t take magnesium or any supplements so going round in circles. 

 

I think in my my heart I know I just have to stick with it as up or down could give me even more problems. 

 

[AliG]

Sometimes, even though I hate the fact that I did a cold turkey , in some ways it was easier because I never really had any choice ~ I always had to battle on with absolutely no drugs~ coping with non -drug techniques ~ do you feel increasing your dose could help?

Edited December 3, 2017 by AliG

[Scorpio]

Hi AliG

 

i know you have been through a terrible time.

 

Yes that’s exactly how I feel, I just don’t know if updosing would help me, coming off completely I think won’t help as I try and believe it is stopping me from complete free fall.   I can get some better days although not for the past week really.  There  have been improvements with my sleep, the horrible morbid thoughts, the burning in the nether regions, the constant bowel  cramping, even the nausea comes and goes now, the constant crying , have improved.

 

What isn’t giving me much of a break is the anxiety, although even that can go sometimes when I’m lucky, and the lost weight. I lost a lot when first on this drug and by about September last year and regained a fair bit but since w/d last a load more and it won’t go back on. Motivation is definitely lacking and I have to push to do menial tasks. The garden was my joy but my poor husband has had to take on that responsibility. The tinnitus is also a huge bugbear.  

 

Im so sorry I know I’m going round in circles I am just feeling like a frightened 3 year old again needing reassurance that it will be alright if I keep steady. Pathetic isn’t it. 

 

[Frogie]

1 hour ago, Scorpio said:

Hi AliG

 

i know you have been through a terrible time.

 

Yes that’s exactly how I feel, I just don’t know if updosing would help me, coming off completely I think won’t help as I try and believe it is stopping me from complete free fall.   I can get some better days although not for the past week really.  There  have been improvements with my sleep, the horrible morbid thoughts, the burning in the nether regions, the constant bowel  cramping, even the nausea comes and goes now, the constant crying , have improved.

 

What isn’t giving me much of a break is the anxiety, although even that can go sometimes when I’m lucky, and the lost weight. I lost a lot when first on this drug and by about September last year and regained a fair bit but since w/d last a load more and it won’t go back on. Motivation is definitely lacking and I have to push to do menial tasks. The garden was my joy but my poor husband has had to take on that responsibility. The tinnitus is also a huge bugbear.  

 

Im so sorry I know I’m going round in circles I am just feeling like a frightened 3 year old again needing reassurance that it will be alright if I keep steady. Pathetic isn’t it. 

 

Scorpio:

 

I'm so sorry you are going through all of this. It sounds like you need a nice long break from being a grandma so you can regain your strength and mental issues. Believe me I know how you feel.

 

I'm so sorry to hear about your grandson getting into the laundry detergent. Is he ok? You handled that so well. I'm proud of you.

 

Take a big breath. That's what I'm doing right now with all this construction going on. But at least it's going on. But what a mess! Lots of stress/anxiety, but I know when they get it done I can soak in a tub.

 

Hang in there. It will be ok for both of us.

 

Take care,

Frogie xx

[AliG]

Your main symptoms right now seem to be anxiety and weight loss. You have had a lot of stress lately, which could be contributing to this.

Are you still using Diazepam?

 

 

Edited December 3, 2017 by AliG
spelling

[Scorpio]

Hi AliG

 

They are the ones that don’t change yes. Weight loss, anxiety.  I am on cipralex but in USA I was led to believe it is called lexapro. It is escitaloprom. 

 

I think the 1mg did settle me a little looking back over my thread. At five months during the time I have been taking it I have had some better days. About a month ago I had a good five days of low anxiety and more energy since then there have been far fewer good days. 

I do think stress can cause me to go downhill more, i know yesterday’s trauma and feeling ill with this cold coming was probably going to cause me problems.  I love having my grandson but when anxiety is high I realise it probably exacerbates it. Unfortunately there is no alternative. My husband tries to help with him but he is just not a hands on grandad for more than 10 minutes and then worn out!  As you say Christmas looming brings the usual pressure, today have made myself start wrapping the presents although all I really wanted to do was lay down. But laying down just makes me feel helpless so when I can I keep going. 

[Scorpio]

1 hour ago, Frogie said:

Scorpio:

 

I'm so sorry you are going through all of this. It sounds like you need a nice long break from being a grandma so you can regain your strength and mental issues. Believe me I know how you feel.

 

I'm so sorry to hear about your grandson getting into the laundry detergent. Is he ok? You handled that so well. I'm proud of you.

 

Take a big breath. That's what I'm doing right now with all this construction going on. But at least it's going on. But what a mess! Lots of stress/anxiety, but I know when they get it done I can soak in a tub.

 

Hang in there. It will be ok for both of us.

 

Take care,

Frogie xx

Hi frogie

 

thank you for your kind words. Yesterday was a nightmare all round. He spent 5 hours in the emergency department being observed and vomiting but they gave him the all clear thank goodness. When I went round at 2 to help he was looking very sorry for himself with a horrible cold and bad experience. 

 

I know how you are going through a huge upheaval with the building work but hopefully after this weekend you will see definite improvements. Try and turn a blind eye to the mess it can all be cleaned once done. Yes just think you can soak in a lovely bath and get to have your granddaughter double joy.  

 

I will Take your advice big breath - cough, splutter, blow my blocked nose and carry on. 

 

Hugs

scorpio. 

[Scorpio]

20 minutes ago, Scorpio said:

Hi AliG

 

They are the ones that don’t change yes. Weight loss, anxiety.  I am on cipralex but in USA I was led to believe it is called lexapro. It is escitaloprom. 

 

I think the 1mg did settle me a little looking back over my thread. At five months during the time I have been taking it I have had some better days. About a month ago I had a good five days of low anxiety and more energy since then there have been far fewer good days. 

I do think stress can cause me to go downhill more, i know yesterday’s trauma and feeling ill with this cold coming was probably going to cause me problems.  I love having my grandson but when anxiety is high I realise it probably exacerbates it. Unfortunately there is no alternative. My husband tries to help with him but he is just not a hands on grandad for more than 10 minutes and then worn out!  As you say Christmas looming brings the usual pressure, today have made myself start wrapping the presents although all I really wanted to do was lay down. But laying down just makes me feel helpless so when I can I keep going. 

Hi alig

i missed the question on Your post. I haven’t used diazepam for a very long time. It was prescribed when I first started this drug and having awful side effects I.e. anxiety, akathisia insomnia.  I used it then very occasionally for relief but stopped it after a couple of months.  I still have the original prescription which is more than three quarters full,  

[Frogie]

27 minutes ago, Scorpio said:

Hi frogie

 

thank you for your kind words. Yesterday was a nightmare all round. He spent 5 hours in the emergency department being observed and vomiting but they gave him the all clear thank goodness. When I went round at 2 to help he was looking very sorry for himself with a horrible cold and bad experience. 

 

I know how you are going through a huge upheaval with the building work but hopefully after this weekend you will see definite improvements. Try and turn a blind eye to the mess it can all be cleaned once done. Yes just think you can soak in a lovely bath and get to have your granddaughter double joy.  

 

I will Take your advice big breath - cough, splutter, blow my blocked nose and carry on. 

 

Hugs

scorpio. 

Hi Scorpio:

 

At least you are keeping busy wrapping presents. I have no energy today to do that. And I checked online for one of my granddaughters Christmas gifts that I ordered on November 14th (I think), and it says arrival date 12-27! So I wrote to the seller and told them that was unacceptable. Haven't heard back from them.

 

It's starting to look like a room. There is still a lot to go. They have studed walls up between the bedroom and bathroom. He still needs to install the fan and then I think the drywall can begin. Big halt because the flooring isn't here (supposed to be here Tuesday) we had to order it. But they can do the electrical, and clean up. So I guess someday it will be done. I hope soon. I really want my granddaughter.

 

I hope you are feeling better. I know you had a lot of stress yesterday on top of a cold.

 

Take care,

Frogie xx

[AliG]

Well, at least you didn't fall down the diazepam rabbit hole ~ that makes life a little easier. Please continue to stay off it. Have you always had a strong reaction to SSRI's? Was it always instantaneous? Do you think you're ultra- sensitive?

[Scorpio]

 

Hi aliG

no I don’t want any more drugs. Doctors hand them out like sweets. 

 

After the citaloprom pooped, a couple of months later, as explained in my thread,  I developed a rash on my face, cramp in toes, lost weight, bruising and low level anxiety and diarrhoea. Visited dr who put me in lyrica, I found it hard to take so halved the dose. It didn’t stop any of them symptoms so after two months stopped. Then real anxiety started. Back to dr who told me it was anxiety disregarded the other symptoms. Put me on ssri’s various had bad reaction to all of them. Sent to psychiatrist who put me on cipralex building the dose by 1mg every three days. I went through hell. Dr and psych kept telling me it would get better gave me diazepam. After 5 months had first short window. I knew drug didn’t suit me and wasn’t solving the original problems. Saw endocrinologist who said steroid inhaler causing problems as had developed sensitivity to it. Stopped steroid inhaler all the original symptoms went within a couple of weeks. 

 

I think the citaloprom caused sensitivity to the inhaler and then lyrica and cipralex have compounded it as now have difficulty taking anything.  So yes very sensitive.