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☼ FarmGirlWorks: sertraline WD - kundalini yoga helping


FarmGirlWorks

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Wow - a 6 day window.....so happy for you FGW!  How wonderful to be able to socialize without the racing thoughts.  You are definitely healing!!  

-1/06 - 3/07 Cymbalta. Fast taper (essentially CT); withdrawal symptoms after 4 mos (didn't realize was WD)

-10/07: 100 mg Zoloft; 1 mg Klonopin - tapered off Klonopin after 4 mos. Several unsuccessful slow tapers of Zoloft; went up and down in dose a lot

-Spring 2013 back on 1 mg Klonopin to counter WD symptoms; switched over 5-6 mos from Zoloft to 35 mg citalopram
-Two attempts at slow tapering citalopram, always increased dose due to WD; also increased Klonopin to 1.25 mg in 2014, then to 1.5 mg in 2015

-8/17-9/17: After holding one year at 20 mg, feeling withdrawal symptoms due to stress - slowly increased to 25 mg. No change in symptoms after 6 months (? tolerance ?)  - decided to start citalopram taper February 2018 (still on Klonopin 1.5 mg).

Supplements: fish oil; magnesium; vitamin D3; curcumin

Citalopram taper:  2/2018 - 12/2019: 25 mg - 11.03 mg I 2020: 10.89 mg - 7.9 mg I 2021: 7.8 mg - 5.26 mg I 2022: 5.2 mg - 3.36 mg I 2023: 3.3 mg - 1.47 mg 2024: 1/5/24: 1.44 mg; 1/19/24: 1.40 mg; 1/26/24: 1.37 mg; 2/2/24: 1.34 mg; 2/9/24: 1.31 mg; 2/23/24: 1.28 mg; 3/1/24: 1.25 mg; 3/8/24: 1.22 mg; 3/15/24: 1.19 mg

 

 

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WOW!   Day 6!  That is so wonderful, FGW!!  So SO happy to hear that!  The view from a window for 6 days must be truly beautiful and feel as beautiful as well!  Hoping it continues for you! 💜

-Nardil 1976 < year, stopped. React to AD's. Klonopin .5BID 1990, 2.5mg til 2016

-Klonopin doubled Jan '16. Taper to 2.25mg May to Nov '16. Bad react to Lexapro, stop. React to Prevacid too, taper off. 

-November '16 Tapered .25mg Klonopin in hospital. Jan '17 started Viibryd, 20mg from Feb to June '17,     

-20mg to 10mg Viibryd from 3/25 to 6/10 2017, 12/15 10% Viibryd taper...back up next day

-Clonazepam 2mg to 1.85mg 4/14 '17 to end November; taper to 1mg Clonazepam in hospital 9/1 tp 9/14 '17

-Feb '18 Amiloride .25mg  5/18 off Amiloride d/t react. Clonaz compounded  

-4/27 '18 Viibryd 9.5mg, 6/11 9.0 mg, 1/27 '19 Viibryd 8.75mg, ; Clonazepam .2mg 530pm and .7mg 1130pm, Premarin .3mg 830PM CARAFATE QID 2/27/19 to 3/5/19

-July 6'19 1/2 10mg Claritin 230pm, stopped it about July 18, started Oct 11 '19, 

-7/27 Viibryd 8.5, 8/29 8.25, 10/24 8.0, 12/19 7.75, Feb '20 7.50, 3/20 7.25, 5/20 7.0, 6/20 6.75, 7/20 6.5, 8/20 6.25, 10/2 20 6.0, 11/25'20 5.75, 1/9/21 5.5, 2/23 5.25

-1015 AM Viibryd, vit D 4,000IU 130, 415 Clonazepam .2mg, 815 Premarin .3mg, 1015 Clonaz .7mg,

  1115 3t fish oil+D 1145 Castor Oil 650mg(4) 1230 Carafate 1/2GM,Methylated B Vit  1/week,Reacted Mag prn

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6 hours ago, FarmGirlWorks said:

 

The other great news is that I got my period today and have only experienced physical symptoms (cramps, sore breasts, increased appetite) and none of the PMDD/PMS mood deep dive that usually happens. I know this happened once last year too so it is not unprecedented but very unusual. Physical symptoms are so, SO much easier for me than the psychological ones.

 

It's usually rough but as someone here pointed out, the brain is focused on how it feels in the present moment. And while I noted that this time last week I was having "black daze," same time this week is okay. Healing is fickle that way.

 

This is very strange - I had the same experience with my period this month -- the days immediately before it started were not filled with PMS emotional issues!!  

 

Im so happy for you having a long window!!!!

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

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@FarmGirlWorks how are u doing today?

13 months on 25 mg of sertraline.

Fast taper in march 2018, reinstated 12.5mg

Cold turkey sertraline april 17,2018

Zyprexa 5mg april 17,2018

Zyprexa taper to lamictal May 4-13 (life threatening rash)

Back on zyprexa 5mg for 10days & tapered over 5 weeks.

21 months off sertraline 

19 months off zyprexa

22 months into withdrawl 

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  • Mentor

I'm okay, Elyssa. Feeling a little uneasy again today but not despairing. The SI is momentary, fleeting. Usually hormones on day 2 of a cycle start to bring me down so this is typical, not stressed about it. The focus is fuzzy when it comes to "big picture" plans but I've gotten a lot done efficiently in the domestic realm (laundry, baking, errands). So I am congratulating myself on that and hope that moves to bigger issues in the future.

  • Prozac | late 2004-mid-2005 | CT WD in a couple months, mostly emotional
  • Sertraline 50-100mg | 11/2011-3/2014, 10/2014-3/2017
  • Sertraline fast taper March 2017, 4 weeks, OFF sertraline April 1, 2017
  • Quit alcohol May 20, 2017
  • Lifestyle changes: AA, kundalini yoga

 

"If you've seen a monster, even if it's horrible, that's evidence of divinity." – Damien Echols

 

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@FarmGirlWorks i very much understand that uneasy feeling. I have it too, rhe SI has gotten a tad better for me. Im hoping it stays. Yes during my period im way worse too although last month wasnt as bad as it has been the past 5 months. Did you have depression in the beginning? I have some minor improvements in my depression which im hoping continues. The focus is definitely fuzzy, its so hard to plan and look forward to the future in this. I hope your window stays or atleast things continue to get better. Im very scared about getting worse as ive already had suicidal depression and severe despair. 😕

13 months on 25 mg of sertraline.

Fast taper in march 2018, reinstated 12.5mg

Cold turkey sertraline april 17,2018

Zyprexa 5mg april 17,2018

Zyprexa taper to lamictal May 4-13 (life threatening rash)

Back on zyprexa 5mg for 10days & tapered over 5 weeks.

21 months off sertraline 

19 months off zyprexa

22 months into withdrawl 

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@FarmGirlWorks congratulations on the accomplishments! It will soon turn to bigger ones! Were u able to function before this? 

13 months on 25 mg of sertraline.

Fast taper in march 2018, reinstated 12.5mg

Cold turkey sertraline april 17,2018

Zyprexa 5mg april 17,2018

Zyprexa taper to lamictal May 4-13 (life threatening rash)

Back on zyprexa 5mg for 10days & tapered over 5 weeks.

21 months off sertraline 

19 months off zyprexa

22 months into withdrawl 

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  • Mentor

Hi @Elyssa143: thanks for the kind words and glad to hear you see improvements in the windows/waves pattern. Everyone's journey is different. To answer your question, anxiety was a big issue, then anxiety followed by depression, now intermittent depression. I've been on the forum for a year now, feel free to check out the thread for any questions you may have about the ins-and-outs of my journey. We are all different 🙂

  • Prozac | late 2004-mid-2005 | CT WD in a couple months, mostly emotional
  • Sertraline 50-100mg | 11/2011-3/2014, 10/2014-3/2017
  • Sertraline fast taper March 2017, 4 weeks, OFF sertraline April 1, 2017
  • Quit alcohol May 20, 2017
  • Lifestyle changes: AA, kundalini yoga

 

"If you've seen a monster, even if it's horrible, that's evidence of divinity." – Damien Echols

 

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@FarmGirlWorks thank you for responding. Depression is my biggest issue and SI and has been since the beginning but even got way wirse when they slapped me on the zyprexa. And off now. But i do have some improvements in the depression so im hopeful.  Is your depression more anhedonia? Is the absolute despair better? Are u functioning better these days? Everyone is different yes im trying hard not to compare my self but im so scared of gettinf worse the further out. Im already having suicidal depression. This is so traumatizing.  I truly hope your having better days and functioning better now :) and healing is happeneing!!!

13 months on 25 mg of sertraline.

Fast taper in march 2018, reinstated 12.5mg

Cold turkey sertraline april 17,2018

Zyprexa 5mg april 17,2018

Zyprexa taper to lamictal May 4-13 (life threatening rash)

Back on zyprexa 5mg for 10days & tapered over 5 weeks.

21 months off sertraline 

19 months off zyprexa

22 months into withdrawl 

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@FarmGirlWorks hope your doing better today! Did you ever have Akathisia?

13 months on 25 mg of sertraline.

Fast taper in march 2018, reinstated 12.5mg

Cold turkey sertraline april 17,2018

Zyprexa 5mg april 17,2018

Zyprexa taper to lamictal May 4-13 (life threatening rash)

Back on zyprexa 5mg for 10days & tapered over 5 weeks.

21 months off sertraline 

19 months off zyprexa

22 months into withdrawl 

Link to comment
  • Mentor
  • Prozac | late 2004-mid-2005 | CT WD in a couple months, mostly emotional
  • Sertraline 50-100mg | 11/2011-3/2014, 10/2014-3/2017
  • Sertraline fast taper March 2017, 4 weeks, OFF sertraline April 1, 2017
  • Quit alcohol May 20, 2017
  • Lifestyle changes: AA, kundalini yoga

 

"If you've seen a monster, even if it's horrible, that's evidence of divinity." – Damien Echols

 

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  • Mentor

I did not mention earlier what the aforementioned articles are about (this morning was a rocky sea of head pressure and depression). Plus I am dog-sitting two dogs who are both high maintenance jerks. Just came back from an AA meeting, though, and feel slight relief psychologically. Like so many here, mornings are worse than afternoons. I still have the head pressure and just popped two ibuprofens in hopes to reduce the pain.

 

The Great God of Depression: How mental illness stopped being “a terrible dark secret.”  It's about William Styron and suicidal depression. "In his telling, suicidal depression is a physical ailment, as unconnected to the patient’s moral character as cancer. "

 

https://www.nytimes.com/2018/08/03/opinion/sunday/depression-william-styron.html?action=click&amp;pgtype=Homepage&amp;clickSource=story-heading&amp;module=opinion-c-col-left-region&amp;region=opinion-c-col-left-region&amp;WT.nav=opinion-c-col-left-region

 

"Mourning Loss and Vision" is from Beyond Meds by Monica Cassani (GiaK here, I think). It is a startling, nakedly honest post about radical acceptance when your body isn't healing the way you had hoped it would. Highly recommend.

https://beyondmeds.com/2018/08/05/mourning-loss-and-vision/

  • Prozac | late 2004-mid-2005 | CT WD in a couple months, mostly emotional
  • Sertraline 50-100mg | 11/2011-3/2014, 10/2014-3/2017
  • Sertraline fast taper March 2017, 4 weeks, OFF sertraline April 1, 2017
  • Quit alcohol May 20, 2017
  • Lifestyle changes: AA, kundalini yoga

 

"If you've seen a monster, even if it's horrible, that's evidence of divinity." – Damien Echols

 

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  • Mentor

Two mornings in a row I have had anxiety dreams. That is new. Yesterday, I took 3000mg (suggested 4 capsules) of dessicated liver which has protein, B vitamins, and aminos in the morning and two (1500mg) at night... I think it might be partially why I feel such anxiety now. And probably that I listened to Joe Rogan last night before sleeping about working on oneself when in depression. Ugh, makes me feel so badly. I am in the same situation as last week (lack of work, isolation, unhappy with the city I live in) but my emotions about this are despairing rather than hopeful and productive during the window I had.

 

Not taking any liver pills today and had some magnesium powder in water upon getting up. And now, reading a success story for hope that this s!#*%show ends.
 

  • Prozac | late 2004-mid-2005 | CT WD in a couple months, mostly emotional
  • Sertraline 50-100mg | 11/2011-3/2014, 10/2014-3/2017
  • Sertraline fast taper March 2017, 4 weeks, OFF sertraline April 1, 2017
  • Quit alcohol May 20, 2017
  • Lifestyle changes: AA, kundalini yoga

 

"If you've seen a monster, even if it's horrible, that's evidence of divinity." – Damien Echols

 

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Hey FGW - So sorry about the anxiety dreams and how you are feeling this morning.  If you can, hold onto how you felt last week and the fact that you felt very differently than you do now which all points to a chemical source (i.e. withdrawal).  

 

9 minutes ago, FarmGirlWorks said:

And probably that I listened to Joe Rogan last night before sleeping about working on oneself when in depression. Ugh, makes me feel so badly

I am not familiar with Joe Rogan but my initial reaction was that it just sounds like too much given what we are facing (i.e. withdrawal).  I am so sorry it made you feel badly.  There will come a time, as you experienced albeit briefly last week, when we can "work on ourselves" in a meaningful way but I wonder if right now is just not that time.  Acceptance and self compassion seems more helpful at the moment - and that is a reminder to myself too!

 

I am hoping these feelings will morph as the morning passes.  I know mornings for me are the worse times, especially with anxiety.

 

I am thinking about you, my friend.

-1/06 - 3/07 Cymbalta. Fast taper (essentially CT); withdrawal symptoms after 4 mos (didn't realize was WD)

-10/07: 100 mg Zoloft; 1 mg Klonopin - tapered off Klonopin after 4 mos. Several unsuccessful slow tapers of Zoloft; went up and down in dose a lot

-Spring 2013 back on 1 mg Klonopin to counter WD symptoms; switched over 5-6 mos from Zoloft to 35 mg citalopram
-Two attempts at slow tapering citalopram, always increased dose due to WD; also increased Klonopin to 1.25 mg in 2014, then to 1.5 mg in 2015

-8/17-9/17: After holding one year at 20 mg, feeling withdrawal symptoms due to stress - slowly increased to 25 mg. No change in symptoms after 6 months (? tolerance ?)  - decided to start citalopram taper February 2018 (still on Klonopin 1.5 mg).

Supplements: fish oil; magnesium; vitamin D3; curcumin

Citalopram taper:  2/2018 - 12/2019: 25 mg - 11.03 mg I 2020: 10.89 mg - 7.9 mg I 2021: 7.8 mg - 5.26 mg I 2022: 5.2 mg - 3.36 mg I 2023: 3.3 mg - 1.47 mg 2024: 1/5/24: 1.44 mg; 1/19/24: 1.40 mg; 1/26/24: 1.37 mg; 2/2/24: 1.34 mg; 2/9/24: 1.31 mg; 2/23/24: 1.28 mg; 3/1/24: 1.25 mg; 3/8/24: 1.22 mg; 3/15/24: 1.19 mg

 

 

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  • Mentor

Thanks, @wantrelief: you're right that acceptance and self-compassion of where we are at is how we have to muddle through this and get better. I was reading Claudius' story just now as a "cheer up." Thinking of you!

  • Prozac | late 2004-mid-2005 | CT WD in a couple months, mostly emotional
  • Sertraline 50-100mg | 11/2011-3/2014, 10/2014-3/2017
  • Sertraline fast taper March 2017, 4 weeks, OFF sertraline April 1, 2017
  • Quit alcohol May 20, 2017
  • Lifestyle changes: AA, kundalini yoga

 

"If you've seen a monster, even if it's horrible, that's evidence of divinity." – Damien Echols

 

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Thinking of you!  It will end and before it ends it will get better.  Somehow that thought helps me get through the rough times.

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

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  • Mentor
4 hours ago, Rosetta said:

It will end and before it ends it will get better.

Love this thought! Thanks, @Rosetta.

 

ps: was just talking to a small biz entrepreneur/baker and single mom who struggles with anxiety/full-blown hyperventilating panic attacks. Her father, a doctor, told her to stay away at all costs from ADs as they are addictive and find other ways to cope... and, to her credit, she hasn't. Essential oils and a validating friend have been helpful in getting her thru the panic attacks.

  • Prozac | late 2004-mid-2005 | CT WD in a couple months, mostly emotional
  • Sertraline 50-100mg | 11/2011-3/2014, 10/2014-3/2017
  • Sertraline fast taper March 2017, 4 weeks, OFF sertraline April 1, 2017
  • Quit alcohol May 20, 2017
  • Lifestyle changes: AA, kundalini yoga

 

"If you've seen a monster, even if it's horrible, that's evidence of divinity." – Damien Echols

 

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Boy...wish I'd had a wise person to tell me the same!!!  

 

Im sorry your are struggling today FGW...it is so hard to have a window and think clearly and then have it vanish...but sounds like it didnt last long as your last post was already more hopeful!  I think that is FABulous!  You are insightful and strong...💜

-Nardil 1976 < year, stopped. React to AD's. Klonopin .5BID 1990, 2.5mg til 2016

-Klonopin doubled Jan '16. Taper to 2.25mg May to Nov '16. Bad react to Lexapro, stop. React to Prevacid too, taper off. 

-November '16 Tapered .25mg Klonopin in hospital. Jan '17 started Viibryd, 20mg from Feb to June '17,     

-20mg to 10mg Viibryd from 3/25 to 6/10 2017, 12/15 10% Viibryd taper...back up next day

-Clonazepam 2mg to 1.85mg 4/14 '17 to end November; taper to 1mg Clonazepam in hospital 9/1 tp 9/14 '17

-Feb '18 Amiloride .25mg  5/18 off Amiloride d/t react. Clonaz compounded  

-4/27 '18 Viibryd 9.5mg, 6/11 9.0 mg, 1/27 '19 Viibryd 8.75mg, ; Clonazepam .2mg 530pm and .7mg 1130pm, Premarin .3mg 830PM CARAFATE QID 2/27/19 to 3/5/19

-July 6'19 1/2 10mg Claritin 230pm, stopped it about July 18, started Oct 11 '19, 

-7/27 Viibryd 8.5, 8/29 8.25, 10/24 8.0, 12/19 7.75, Feb '20 7.50, 3/20 7.25, 5/20 7.0, 6/20 6.75, 7/20 6.5, 8/20 6.25, 10/2 20 6.0, 11/25'20 5.75, 1/9/21 5.5, 2/23 5.25

-1015 AM Viibryd, vit D 4,000IU 130, 415 Clonazepam .2mg, 815 Premarin .3mg, 1015 Clonaz .7mg,

  1115 3t fish oil+D 1145 Castor Oil 650mg(4) 1230 Carafate 1/2GM,Methylated B Vit  1/week,Reacted Mag prn

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  • Mentor

Intensely high anxiety today, could not nap or keep still. At kundalini class in the past there have been rough times where I've been in a bad place but white-knuckled through it; but at this class I was white-knuckling and quite nauseated. Dialed all my movements way back and didn't vomit in class (small victories).

 

I can't remember being so bad since at least this April. Thinking back on situational similarities, there was a change in temp to high heat, different/unhealthy food, and relationship confrontations. In this case, two days ago, the latter was just me honestly confronting some distressing feelings but that, combined with heat and a hot dog, certainly triggered something. Is this part of cold turkey hell? A return to symptoms that passed long ago. I am trying not to have anticipatory anxiety for the depression that has followed anxiety waves but not successful yet.

 

I am not going to take any supplements except magnesium powder tomorrow and have an acupuncture session scheduled in the morning. Hope it helps. WTF.

  • Prozac | late 2004-mid-2005 | CT WD in a couple months, mostly emotional
  • Sertraline 50-100mg | 11/2011-3/2014, 10/2014-3/2017
  • Sertraline fast taper March 2017, 4 weeks, OFF sertraline April 1, 2017
  • Quit alcohol May 20, 2017
  • Lifestyle changes: AA, kundalini yoga

 

"If you've seen a monster, even if it's horrible, that's evidence of divinity." – Damien Echols

 

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That high anxiety I too find so so difficult to manage in any kind of effective way...has a power of its own.  Im sorry you have been dealing with the anxiety...it quite frankly sucks!  Hope it passes soon for you!  

 

I can say that for me the change to high humidity and intense heat has a huge affect, as does food....as does emotional stress...those would cause me anxiety....so hoping as they pass, the anxiety will as well!

 

Thinking about you FGW! 💜

-Nardil 1976 < year, stopped. React to AD's. Klonopin .5BID 1990, 2.5mg til 2016

-Klonopin doubled Jan '16. Taper to 2.25mg May to Nov '16. Bad react to Lexapro, stop. React to Prevacid too, taper off. 

-November '16 Tapered .25mg Klonopin in hospital. Jan '17 started Viibryd, 20mg from Feb to June '17,     

-20mg to 10mg Viibryd from 3/25 to 6/10 2017, 12/15 10% Viibryd taper...back up next day

-Clonazepam 2mg to 1.85mg 4/14 '17 to end November; taper to 1mg Clonazepam in hospital 9/1 tp 9/14 '17

-Feb '18 Amiloride .25mg  5/18 off Amiloride d/t react. Clonaz compounded  

-4/27 '18 Viibryd 9.5mg, 6/11 9.0 mg, 1/27 '19 Viibryd 8.75mg, ; Clonazepam .2mg 530pm and .7mg 1130pm, Premarin .3mg 830PM CARAFATE QID 2/27/19 to 3/5/19

-July 6'19 1/2 10mg Claritin 230pm, stopped it about July 18, started Oct 11 '19, 

-7/27 Viibryd 8.5, 8/29 8.25, 10/24 8.0, 12/19 7.75, Feb '20 7.50, 3/20 7.25, 5/20 7.0, 6/20 6.75, 7/20 6.5, 8/20 6.25, 10/2 20 6.0, 11/25'20 5.75, 1/9/21 5.5, 2/23 5.25

-1015 AM Viibryd, vit D 4,000IU 130, 415 Clonazepam .2mg, 815 Premarin .3mg, 1015 Clonaz .7mg,

  1115 3t fish oil+D 1145 Castor Oil 650mg(4) 1230 Carafate 1/2GM,Methylated B Vit  1/week,Reacted Mag prn

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@FarmGirlWorks I'm sorry to hear of your high anxiety. I was listening to Baylissa healing process yesterday and I realized it's very common to get symptoms back but I dont think their as intense or as long lasting. Atleast we hope. How had your depression  been? I had 5 really good days and went back into a wave yesterday.  But I'm up today doing a little more than I did yesterday so I'm greatful. I hope today is better for you, does the accupuncture help?

13 months on 25 mg of sertraline.

Fast taper in march 2018, reinstated 12.5mg

Cold turkey sertraline april 17,2018

Zyprexa 5mg april 17,2018

Zyprexa taper to lamictal May 4-13 (life threatening rash)

Back on zyprexa 5mg for 10days & tapered over 5 weeks.

21 months off sertraline 

19 months off zyprexa

22 months into withdrawl 

Link to comment
  • Mentor

Thanks @Rabe and @Elyssa143. The acupuncture alleviated some of the pressure in my skull that felt like my brain was trying to burst out. I have thick cog fog but the pressure is diminished. It has been over a month since I had an acupuncture session and clearly I still need it more often.

 

Heading to my AA sponsor now: it takes a lot of time to be sick 😞

  • Prozac | late 2004-mid-2005 | CT WD in a couple months, mostly emotional
  • Sertraline 50-100mg | 11/2011-3/2014, 10/2014-3/2017
  • Sertraline fast taper March 2017, 4 weeks, OFF sertraline April 1, 2017
  • Quit alcohol May 20, 2017
  • Lifestyle changes: AA, kundalini yoga

 

"If you've seen a monster, even if it's horrible, that's evidence of divinity." – Damien Echols

 

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@FarmGirlWorks so glad to hear it helps I'd like to start going. Do u think it helps with your depression too? 

13 months on 25 mg of sertraline.

Fast taper in march 2018, reinstated 12.5mg

Cold turkey sertraline april 17,2018

Zyprexa 5mg april 17,2018

Zyprexa taper to lamictal May 4-13 (life threatening rash)

Back on zyprexa 5mg for 10days & tapered over 5 weeks.

21 months off sertraline 

19 months off zyprexa

22 months into withdrawl 

Link to comment
  • Mentor

I PM'ed you, Elyssa.

  • Prozac | late 2004-mid-2005 | CT WD in a couple months, mostly emotional
  • Sertraline 50-100mg | 11/2011-3/2014, 10/2014-3/2017
  • Sertraline fast taper March 2017, 4 weeks, OFF sertraline April 1, 2017
  • Quit alcohol May 20, 2017
  • Lifestyle changes: AA, kundalini yoga

 

"If you've seen a monster, even if it's horrible, that's evidence of divinity." – Damien Echols

 

Link to comment

I hope the acupuncture helps you, FGW.  I'm sorry you had high anxiety.  Sending hugs, R

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

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  • Mentor

Quick update that last week I had 4.5ish days of akathisia. I thought that horrendous symptom had disappeared but it came back with a vengeance. Felt like a live electrical wire with no buffer around it was coursing through my body. Intense head pressure alleviated by acupuncture. 

 

Good news is that this isn't my first time at the akathisia rodeo and did not entertain too many SI thoughts; if they came, I tried to redirect. And, while I haven't kept notes about symptoms and durations, I feel like this bout lasted less time. Triggers may have included: too hot epsom salt bath, B vitamins, a big hot dog, distressing thoughts/emotions about a major relationship, heat... who knows. I hate being this sensitive but I am coming around to the belief that it's the way it is and my former coping skills (drugs, weed, wine) no longer are available so I am learning -- in mid-life -- new ways to cope. Lord have mercy.

  • Prozac | late 2004-mid-2005 | CT WD in a couple months, mostly emotional
  • Sertraline 50-100mg | 11/2011-3/2014, 10/2014-3/2017
  • Sertraline fast taper March 2017, 4 weeks, OFF sertraline April 1, 2017
  • Quit alcohol May 20, 2017
  • Lifestyle changes: AA, kundalini yoga

 

"If you've seen a monster, even if it's horrible, that's evidence of divinity." – Damien Echols

 

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Hi FGW...any one of those triggers would have set me off...the fact that you had all of them and handled it all is something!  You are resilient and moving forward.  Thinking about you!

-Nardil 1976 < year, stopped. React to AD's. Klonopin .5BID 1990, 2.5mg til 2016

-Klonopin doubled Jan '16. Taper to 2.25mg May to Nov '16. Bad react to Lexapro, stop. React to Prevacid too, taper off. 

-November '16 Tapered .25mg Klonopin in hospital. Jan '17 started Viibryd, 20mg from Feb to June '17,     

-20mg to 10mg Viibryd from 3/25 to 6/10 2017, 12/15 10% Viibryd taper...back up next day

-Clonazepam 2mg to 1.85mg 4/14 '17 to end November; taper to 1mg Clonazepam in hospital 9/1 tp 9/14 '17

-Feb '18 Amiloride .25mg  5/18 off Amiloride d/t react. Clonaz compounded  

-4/27 '18 Viibryd 9.5mg, 6/11 9.0 mg, 1/27 '19 Viibryd 8.75mg, ; Clonazepam .2mg 530pm and .7mg 1130pm, Premarin .3mg 830PM CARAFATE QID 2/27/19 to 3/5/19

-July 6'19 1/2 10mg Claritin 230pm, stopped it about July 18, started Oct 11 '19, 

-7/27 Viibryd 8.5, 8/29 8.25, 10/24 8.0, 12/19 7.75, Feb '20 7.50, 3/20 7.25, 5/20 7.0, 6/20 6.75, 7/20 6.5, 8/20 6.25, 10/2 20 6.0, 11/25'20 5.75, 1/9/21 5.5, 2/23 5.25

-1015 AM Viibryd, vit D 4,000IU 130, 415 Clonazepam .2mg, 815 Premarin .3mg, 1015 Clonaz .7mg,

  1115 3t fish oil+D 1145 Castor Oil 650mg(4) 1230 Carafate 1/2GM,Methylated B Vit  1/week,Reacted Mag prn

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  • Mentor

Took a kundalini workshop today (it continues tomorrow) and it was intense. The topic is "Vitality and Stress." Good news is that I actually cried in front of a stranger today. We were sharing and I was saying that a top stressor is that my disabilities are all "invisible" and while I am strategizing around them all the time, nobody really knows. And, while I did not mention it to my sharing partner, antidepressant WD is an invisible illness as well and I truly felt how harrowing it has been. Harrowing. That brought the emotion to the surface.

 

Anyways, I started to tear up talking about it. I guess I actually didn't cry but shedding a few tears is kinda awesome.

 

I did feel socially awkward due to WD but I really wanted to do this so pushed through...

  • Prozac | late 2004-mid-2005 | CT WD in a couple months, mostly emotional
  • Sertraline 50-100mg | 11/2011-3/2014, 10/2014-3/2017
  • Sertraline fast taper March 2017, 4 weeks, OFF sertraline April 1, 2017
  • Quit alcohol May 20, 2017
  • Lifestyle changes: AA, kundalini yoga

 

"If you've seen a monster, even if it's horrible, that's evidence of divinity." – Damien Echols

 

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So many wonderful things happening in your post....your attending the workshop, being vulnerable in front of a stranger, and pushing through......you are very courageous and inspirational, FGW!  Harrowing is a good word for the AD withdrawal experience.

-1/06 - 3/07 Cymbalta. Fast taper (essentially CT); withdrawal symptoms after 4 mos (didn't realize was WD)

-10/07: 100 mg Zoloft; 1 mg Klonopin - tapered off Klonopin after 4 mos. Several unsuccessful slow tapers of Zoloft; went up and down in dose a lot

-Spring 2013 back on 1 mg Klonopin to counter WD symptoms; switched over 5-6 mos from Zoloft to 35 mg citalopram
-Two attempts at slow tapering citalopram, always increased dose due to WD; also increased Klonopin to 1.25 mg in 2014, then to 1.5 mg in 2015

-8/17-9/17: After holding one year at 20 mg, feeling withdrawal symptoms due to stress - slowly increased to 25 mg. No change in symptoms after 6 months (? tolerance ?)  - decided to start citalopram taper February 2018 (still on Klonopin 1.5 mg).

Supplements: fish oil; magnesium; vitamin D3; curcumin

Citalopram taper:  2/2018 - 12/2019: 25 mg - 11.03 mg I 2020: 10.89 mg - 7.9 mg I 2021: 7.8 mg - 5.26 mg I 2022: 5.2 mg - 3.36 mg I 2023: 3.3 mg - 1.47 mg 2024: 1/5/24: 1.44 mg; 1/19/24: 1.40 mg; 1/26/24: 1.37 mg; 2/2/24: 1.34 mg; 2/9/24: 1.31 mg; 2/23/24: 1.28 mg; 3/1/24: 1.25 mg; 3/8/24: 1.22 mg; 3/15/24: 1.19 mg

 

 

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Yea!  You are doing so well.  I'm glad the Akathisia left!!  I'm really, really sick of that coming back for me.  It scrambles my brain as well as bring very physically uncomfortable.  I sometimes have imaginary conversations with psychiatrists about their ignorance that ADs can cause Akathisia. (They don't end well.)

 

Keep on keepin' on!  You are a survivor. - R

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

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16 hours ago, FarmGirlWorks said:

WD is an invisible illness as well and I truly felt how harrowing it has been. Harrowing. That brought the emotion to the surface.

This is so true, and heartbreaking. We are getting better. It is just so slow. Harrowing is the right word.

2001- Klonopin 0.125 mg.  2011- increase to 1 mg.  2018- increase to 1.5 mg 

2010- Trials of SSRI's, several.

2011- Saphris 5 mg. CT. 6/2017- retry Saphris 5 mg sublingual, begin taper August 2020 10% taper with scale, and final taper liquid sublingual, August 2019- taper complete!

2011- Geodon 20 mg. Begin taper Sept 2019. 10% liquid taper. 2020: December-5 mg. 2021: Jan-4.5mg. (held Feb.for vacation). March-4mg. Apr-3.6mg. May-3.2mg. June-2.8mg. (Held July for vacation). Aug-2.4mg. Sept.- 2.2mg. Oct. 2mg. Dec 2022 - Taper complete!

2011- Gabapentin 300 mg to present- 2020. Increase 2023 to 400mg.

2014- Vyvanse 20 mg, 2020- Vyvanse 5 mg. Increase August 2022 20mg

2016- Lithium 300 mg, June 2016 - FT.

2017- Cogentin 0.5 mg. June-August 2019- off Cogentin.

2021 - Hydroxyzine 30mg. Holding.

Omeprazole 20 mg and holding, Omega 3's/fish oil, Magnesium

 

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On 8/10/2018 at 6:01 PM, FarmGirlWorks said:

Heading to my AA sponsor now: it takes a lot of time to be sick 😞

OMG YES! Th etime and money to take care of oneself in Wd and recovery. I was just saying this!

2001- Klonopin 0.125 mg.  2011- increase to 1 mg.  2018- increase to 1.5 mg 

2010- Trials of SSRI's, several.

2011- Saphris 5 mg. CT. 6/2017- retry Saphris 5 mg sublingual, begin taper August 2020 10% taper with scale, and final taper liquid sublingual, August 2019- taper complete!

2011- Geodon 20 mg. Begin taper Sept 2019. 10% liquid taper. 2020: December-5 mg. 2021: Jan-4.5mg. (held Feb.for vacation). March-4mg. Apr-3.6mg. May-3.2mg. June-2.8mg. (Held July for vacation). Aug-2.4mg. Sept.- 2.2mg. Oct. 2mg. Dec 2022 - Taper complete!

2011- Gabapentin 300 mg to present- 2020. Increase 2023 to 400mg.

2014- Vyvanse 20 mg, 2020- Vyvanse 5 mg. Increase August 2022 20mg

2016- Lithium 300 mg, June 2016 - FT.

2017- Cogentin 0.5 mg. June-August 2019- off Cogentin.

2021 - Hydroxyzine 30mg. Holding.

Omeprazole 20 mg and holding, Omega 3's/fish oil, Magnesium

 

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What a brave and wonderful thing you did i sharing your WD with others, FGW!  Stress does not even begin to describe it...yes harrowing and more!

Even though it was difficult it must have felt really good later...truly an inspiration!!!💜

-Nardil 1976 < year, stopped. React to AD's. Klonopin .5BID 1990, 2.5mg til 2016

-Klonopin doubled Jan '16. Taper to 2.25mg May to Nov '16. Bad react to Lexapro, stop. React to Prevacid too, taper off. 

-November '16 Tapered .25mg Klonopin in hospital. Jan '17 started Viibryd, 20mg from Feb to June '17,     

-20mg to 10mg Viibryd from 3/25 to 6/10 2017, 12/15 10% Viibryd taper...back up next day

-Clonazepam 2mg to 1.85mg 4/14 '17 to end November; taper to 1mg Clonazepam in hospital 9/1 tp 9/14 '17

-Feb '18 Amiloride .25mg  5/18 off Amiloride d/t react. Clonaz compounded  

-4/27 '18 Viibryd 9.5mg, 6/11 9.0 mg, 1/27 '19 Viibryd 8.75mg, ; Clonazepam .2mg 530pm and .7mg 1130pm, Premarin .3mg 830PM CARAFATE QID 2/27/19 to 3/5/19

-July 6'19 1/2 10mg Claritin 230pm, stopped it about July 18, started Oct 11 '19, 

-7/27 Viibryd 8.5, 8/29 8.25, 10/24 8.0, 12/19 7.75, Feb '20 7.50, 3/20 7.25, 5/20 7.0, 6/20 6.75, 7/20 6.5, 8/20 6.25, 10/2 20 6.0, 11/25'20 5.75, 1/9/21 5.5, 2/23 5.25

-1015 AM Viibryd, vit D 4,000IU 130, 415 Clonazepam .2mg, 815 Premarin .3mg, 1015 Clonaz .7mg,

  1115 3t fish oil+D 1145 Castor Oil 650mg(4) 1230 Carafate 1/2GM,Methylated B Vit  1/week,Reacted Mag prn

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  • Mentor
On 8/19/2018 at 1:50 PM, Rosetta said:

I'm really, really sick of that coming back for me.  It scrambles my brain as well as bring very physically uncomfortable.  I sometimes have imaginary conversations with psychiatrists about their ignorance that ADs can cause Akathisia. (They don't end well.)

@Rosetta: I'm glad too. I have high anxiety today (difficulty focusing, head pressure, dark thoughts -- ugh) but I don't think it has risen to akathisia. I only feel slightly "wired." I began seeing a therapist to try to untangle some of the stuff in my head but gave her a page of notes at the beginning that began in all caps, "DON'T EVER MENTION TAKING MORE ANTIDEPRESSANTS." I guess I am skeptical of the profession these days but she got the message.
 

On 8/19/2018 at 2:05 PM, DMV64 said:

OMG YES! The time and money to take care of oneself in Wd and recovery. I was just saying this!

@DMV64: I know, I know... just made another acupuncture appointment. Thankful that community acupuncture is nearby so I don't have to spend too much $ on that. I tracked my hours last week and, while I knew that I spend a lot of time on healing activities (AA, yoga, acupuncture, therapy, sleep...) I was shocked by how much time it takes in a week. I can't wait for all of us to heal -- whenever that is. I am looking at this time of deep healing as the time when our life is transmuted; not often a comfortable process but the rewards will be worth it. I have to believe that.

 

Thanks for the encouragement @Rabe, @wantrelief -- much appreciated.

  • Prozac | late 2004-mid-2005 | CT WD in a couple months, mostly emotional
  • Sertraline 50-100mg | 11/2011-3/2014, 10/2014-3/2017
  • Sertraline fast taper March 2017, 4 weeks, OFF sertraline April 1, 2017
  • Quit alcohol May 20, 2017
  • Lifestyle changes: AA, kundalini yoga

 

"If you've seen a monster, even if it's horrible, that's evidence of divinity." – Damien Echols

 

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  • Mentor

Another day of intense head pressure. Went to acupuncture and it seems to have decreased and also the anxiety seems less. He used the anti-anxiety spots in the ears and points on the top of the head (crown chakra) and points on the elbows, wrists, and ankles. I felt like I went in and out of napping and experiencing full-body "visions." Pulsating light and sensations of heaviness and lightness in the chest. Kinda wild.

 

But I know that when I had the brain tumor 14 years ago but before it was diagnosed at UCSF and was presenting symptoms like dizziness, vertigo, nausea that looked like Meniere's Disease, I got acupuncture and it really helped alleviate the symptoms. Now, I did still have a flippin' big tumor but it helped the brain. I am hoping it does again.

  • Prozac | late 2004-mid-2005 | CT WD in a couple months, mostly emotional
  • Sertraline 50-100mg | 11/2011-3/2014, 10/2014-3/2017
  • Sertraline fast taper March 2017, 4 weeks, OFF sertraline April 1, 2017
  • Quit alcohol May 20, 2017
  • Lifestyle changes: AA, kundalini yoga

 

"If you've seen a monster, even if it's horrible, that's evidence of divinity." – Damien Echols

 

Link to comment

I am so glad acupuncture helped with the intense head pressure and anxiety, FGW.  It sounds like it was quite an experience too!  

-1/06 - 3/07 Cymbalta. Fast taper (essentially CT); withdrawal symptoms after 4 mos (didn't realize was WD)

-10/07: 100 mg Zoloft; 1 mg Klonopin - tapered off Klonopin after 4 mos. Several unsuccessful slow tapers of Zoloft; went up and down in dose a lot

-Spring 2013 back on 1 mg Klonopin to counter WD symptoms; switched over 5-6 mos from Zoloft to 35 mg citalopram
-Two attempts at slow tapering citalopram, always increased dose due to WD; also increased Klonopin to 1.25 mg in 2014, then to 1.5 mg in 2015

-8/17-9/17: After holding one year at 20 mg, feeling withdrawal symptoms due to stress - slowly increased to 25 mg. No change in symptoms after 6 months (? tolerance ?)  - decided to start citalopram taper February 2018 (still on Klonopin 1.5 mg).

Supplements: fish oil; magnesium; vitamin D3; curcumin

Citalopram taper:  2/2018 - 12/2019: 25 mg - 11.03 mg I 2020: 10.89 mg - 7.9 mg I 2021: 7.8 mg - 5.26 mg I 2022: 5.2 mg - 3.36 mg I 2023: 3.3 mg - 1.47 mg 2024: 1/5/24: 1.44 mg; 1/19/24: 1.40 mg; 1/26/24: 1.37 mg; 2/2/24: 1.34 mg; 2/9/24: 1.31 mg; 2/23/24: 1.28 mg; 3/1/24: 1.25 mg; 3/8/24: 1.22 mg; 3/15/24: 1.19 mg

 

 

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