JS11: So close to being free of Escitalopram/Adderall. Now side-effect RX nightmare

September 3, 2017

4 minutes ago, JS11 said:

Thank you, trying to learn where to go...

Hi Baroquep,

I followed the link and it showed the page with medication history. I'm still uncertain as how to remove the tag lines from your name, eg. Escitalopram, Adderall XR, Did I miss something?

September 3, 2017

Hi JS,

I've fixed up the title of your topic to what is was named originally and there are no tags for you topic.

September 3, 2017

Not to worry, it does take a bit of getting used to and withdrawal certainly doesn't help matters. Your Title has been changed back to your original and tags have now been removed.

Edited September 3, 2017 by baroquep

September 3, 2017

If mean that you want to change your signature here is the link: Account Settings – Create or Edit a signature

September 4, 2017

1 hour ago, ChessieCat said:

If mean that you want to change your signature here is the link: Account Settings – Create or Edit a signature

Yes, thank you, ChessieCat and Baroquep.

I think I am missing something here. I just want to remove the tags that say Hydroxyline, Gabapentin as I eliminated them. Important to me I guess as they were foul. I have followed the link and do see where to edit the medications but I am having difficulty as there doesn't seem to be a place for the tags on your signature.

Thank you,

JS

September 4, 2017

Hi again, the tags are added behind the scenes. I've added your current drugs Escitalopram, Adderall and Thyroid ... are these the tags that you want to show in your profile?

September 4, 2017

Yes, thank you for all the extra work! I appreciate it.

September 4, 2017

15 hours ago, JS11 said:

Hi Mort81,

You must be a late nighter. And no, it is not frustrating to describe all of this. I am just so very grateful to you for listening and giving me guidance. The anxiety and all the accompanying fear are so very tough to bear.

I take all my RX's at the same time. I was trying to be clear on my signature. I have been on Adderrall for some time. Started to taper the dose around last Fall from 25mg, originally. I was down to 5mg of the Extended Release tablet, then crossed over to the Immediate Release tablet at 5mg. I also started to lower the Lex as well which is when major symptoms, Nightmares, P.T.S.D., unbearable restlessness started. I switched back to the Extended Release form of Add. Shortly after that I began the cascade of other drugs and the updosing of the Lex as well. I don't think I want to mess with my dose of Adderall just now.

I am still so uncertain about the Lex. though. I don't know if the liquid could be causing the sudden surge, the constant changes in dosage, the addition and subtraction of all the other medications. It is hard to know but any additional thoughts are appreciated. I just shudder when I start to take my medicine. Last night, the symptoms seemed to make a resurgence around 11pm and just kept coming in floods throughout the early a.m. The anxiety has been constant and seems to be increasing. Sigh.

As per the Adderall: About 9 years ago I was prescribed something called Providal. It is for shift workers and helps regulate sleep. I have Fibromyalgia (much improved since that time) and had been unable to sleep forever, usually going to bed between 3 and 5am. I think I was a zombie for years, long before it became popular. For the first time in ages, I was not only able to sleep at so called "normal" hours, but I could get up early as well. That drug eventually gave me headaches and then went on a series of similar ones and finally Adderall XR which is the only one that did not have that side-effect, even after prolonged use. Although I do definitely have some of the ADD symptoms (male family members as well), I don't know if I would say, that diagnosis is a good fit. I now wonder if all the years of Lexapro and other antidepressants sedated me to such an extent that I wasn't able to function. Both times  I got off the Lexapro, I had so much energy, but then I was on a generous dose of Adderall as well. So, that original prescription of Providgal which ended up as Adderall, may have actually been to off-set the fatigue produced by the Lexapro? Gotta wonder.   What a tangled web we weave....

And yes, the reaction I have after I take my prescriptions is almost immediate. I have added the liquid Lex back into the picture though. When I first went from tablet to pill form, I had that same reaction. There were so many variables though. I did have mornings before all these other additions where taking the prescriptions stopped the anxiety.

Now, I just dread taking it. Last night was rugged. Fitfull sleep. Anxiety and that pesky dizziness too.

Woke up at 5am with anxiety, thought maybe a little of the Lex would help, so I took the 3.5mg liquid. No relief.

5:30 I took the other 5mgs of Lex and the AddXR 5mg and thryoid as well.

Constant anxiety since. Weird numbing sensations in odd places as well. And that frieight train in the chest feeling. Ugh x 10. It feels kindof warm? too. My stomach has that I just dropped in the elevator feeling. Just unrelenting today. I did try the Magnesium fizz I'm not sipping it if that is what you are supposed to do but rather chugging the stuff. Just all nasty stuff Mort81. I know you can relate, which is comforting.

Makes me angry that I got into that desperate reaching for and clutching at a bottle mode. Anything to make the unbearable anxiety go away. I am kindof grasping at the Magnesium that way and must be aware of this fact.   Too much of anything...

I have had odd stomach jabs here and there which began when I upped the Lex again. Not constant though, thankfully. A month of stomach distress. Oh my gosh. Was the drug you were given that produced your stomach trauma an anti as well.? You mentioned earlier about being in the hospital and thinking it was the Lex but wasn't sure. I wonder if doctors even look for this? I know when I had my Adverse/Neurotoxic reaction, it was one of my pharmacists who caught it. Thank goodness for him.

Your stomach issues did eventually subside? Were you in the process of eliminating Lexapro then?    You are wise that you stopped accepting the new medications. I do wonder what my psychiatrist will say about all of this. I see her in a couple of weeks.

Thanks Mort81

For all your support. How is the tooth today?

take care,

JS

Glad I can be of some help! The tooth is okay , a bit sensitive , but waiting for the dentist to come from his trip then Ill have to do some work! My stomach pain that I had for the first year is gone ! It lasted a long time , It was horrific , best way to decribe it was so bruised and sore , tender to the touch for around 12+ months . I still have some stomach issues but they are different . I all started from my trainwreck of a taper , when I hit 5mg the s-----t hit the fan! all hell broke loose ! and I wasnt able to figure out what to do , bad advice etc... so I didnt go up in dose , I just stopped. YA all my trouble has been because of the Lex. Nobody caught the blackouts . I think the pyschiatrist I saw to taper thought maybe the meds were draining me of magenesium etc.. but he didnt know his stuff.

I am a night OWL ! I always have been a late night person but one of my symptoms from the LEx has been a really messed up sleep schedule. I used to be a late night person all the time but right now I can never sleep when I want , ever , no matttr what I do. So I cant get on a schedule. I never had this problem before . I think this is something that has to take its course , basically like most of the WD symptoms. Like today I didnt sleep until 12-1pm . I woke up around 4-5 pm , usually I get 7-9 hrs of sleep but today I somehow woke up , I never do to be honest but mainly because even If I wake up after 1 hour of sleep. I still cant go to sleep during the nighttime that night. So tonight I tried to sleep from 12-5am and just tossed and turned , so here I am ! My hours basically go round and round,

Its hard because we want to do whatever we can to make whatever symptom is too tough go away. This I find is the hardest part, when a symptom, doesnt matter which one it is , is lets say over an 8/10 it becomes all too much to tolerate. I would try and do things to bring it down anyway I could . sometimes things would work and others it would not. The magnesium can help but as you know it wont take away the symptom thats foresure. Just like all the rests , it has to run its course..

You do decribe your symptoms pretty well! The elevator feeling I get alot ! I get that in my whole body , like right after you step off an elevator , you get that feeling where when you take a step everything is completely all out of sorts? I get rushes of warm and cold throughout all my body. I know that one!

feels like you drink a jug of poision everyday ? I would be nervous to take the dose aswell , I dont blame you , I just hope this is the lesser of two evils . IF you tapered off now it could be a trainwreck , although this is no picnic either I understand that.

OKay i know understand about the adderal , better to keep it steady for now, It could have been a counter punch to what the SSRIs were doing , very possible! I dont know if ADHD exists? maybe it does , I am skeptical now about all diagnosis. Maybe in extreme cases it does but most of the people getting these pills probably dont need them , THE DSM sets guidelines for things like that to include 80% of the population . Same with bi polar , everyone or almost everyone can qualify to be bi polar. If you ever look at a test that people fill out to see if they are bi polar its pretty funny. Its literally all normal human emotion. ITs very general and it works! people like to identify with things , too bad they dont know how dangerous the treatment is.

For you I think its a combination of all of the above! although I do think the reinstatement of the lex is the right decision. IT can still be stimulating though. But if you feel its making you much worse than its your call. One thing is that this is your life , you gotta do what you think is right . But I would probably give it a bit more time to see if it can steady out. Its not a easy decision I understand that . THe thing is , if you stop taking the LEX now it could be a very bumpy ride . The RI hopefully slows that down alot! I just know what Ive gone through is hell . and if I went back I would try to RI . BUt I was far out when I found this site. So maybe I dont RI. BUt if i was just a few weeks or a couple of months , I would 100% try to stabalize on something , then slowly taper off .

Zombies werent always cool!?? I gueess not ! hahah !

September 4, 2017

13 hours ago, JS11 said:

Oh I know isn't it. If only we could counter for every drug commercial with an alternative or stories from those in the know. Are they allowed to have those ads on TV in Canada? I know that cigarette ads are no longer allowed and you can't see someone drinking a beer for example. Just the glass raising, the auditory effects and the glass going down again. As if we are fooled. So odd.

Yeah, I am so hoping the roller coaster will calm down. Lots of other life to contend with as we all have. A little anxiety holiday or permanent vacation away would be so very welcome.

take care,

JS

I wish we could ! that would be great! I am a big sports guy so when Its not hockey season , I often watch the american channels for football , baseball etc.. and every other commercial is a frikken pharma add!! I have to turn all the time , In canada we dont have pharma adds. BUt our people are equally drugged as yours are. They think people are sheep ! well they kinda are! its working !

I know what you mean , I hope your holiday comes soon!

13 hours ago, JS11 said:

And you've gotta love Bambi. I feed deer much to the chagrin of some of the neighbors although I know they do as well. Can't fool me.

HAHAAH! yup nothing wrong with bambi! screw the neighbors!

September 5, 2017

So we're drugged both sides of the border. So much for international relations, huh? No commercials but they get to you just the same. Baaaaaaa. I wonder if they have compared this. Are the yanks more into pharma because of the ads. or about the same as you? Would love to have those blasted things go away. The one with the little happy face on a placard? Maybe I need one of those on a popsickle stick. I think it would have a grrr or little wavy face on it at the moment.

A hockey fan, hmmmm. I went to my first, I don't know if only hockey game at age 11. Some free tickets for a school award or some such thing. I just remember this grey-haired grandma, hey, she could have been a prematurely grey 20 something, but every one looks old when you are a kid. The woman was screaming the F**** word. Back in the day, at least mine, it was not tossed around like it is now. I mean, hell was enough for my brothers to have a bar of soap for dinner and feast they did. I think that experience colored any potential future as a hockey fan. But I know you Canadians are mad for it. As mad as the Europeans are for soccer/football? If they have riots up yonder, we sure don't see them. We have too many violent events of our own to televise. Just look at our politics...enough to make anyone thing pharmaceuticals are the answer. NOOOOOOOO!

I do like men's college basketball. My college team does quite well and I typically follow them. The occasional football game. The Superbowl for the commercials. Typical stuff. I look at it as a socially acceptable way to express your emotions. Screaming your lungs out, I don't do this all the time, but people don't look oddly at you unless you are an obnoxious fan in quite the same way as if you did this, say, in the supermarket.

September 5, 2017

NEVERMIND. Sorry!

September 5, 2017

18 hours ago, Mort81 said:

Glad I can be of some help! The tooth is okay , a bit sensitive , but waiting for the dentist to come from his trip then Ill have to do some work! My stomach pain that I had for the first year is gone ! It lasted a long time , It was horrific , best way to decribe it was so bruised and sore , tender to the touch for around 12+ months . I still have some stomach issues but they are different . I all started from my trainwreck of a taper , when I hit 5mg the s-----t hit the fan! all hell broke loose ! and I wasnt able to figure out what to do , bad advice etc... so I didnt go up in dose , I just stopped. YA all my trouble has been because of the Lex. Nobody caught the blackouts . I think the pyschiatrist I saw to taper thought maybe the meds were draining me of magenesium etc.. but he didnt know his stuff.

I am a night OWL ! I always have been a late night person but one of my symptoms from the LEx has been a really messed up sleep schedule. I used to be a late night person all the time but right now I can never sleep when I want , ever , no matttr what I do. So I cant get on a schedule. I never had this problem before . I think this is something that has to take its course , basically like most of the WD symptoms. Like today I didnt sleep until 12-1pm . I woke up around 4-5 pm , usually I get 7-9 hrs of sleep but today I somehow woke up , I never do to be honest but mainly because even If I wake up after 1 hour of sleep. I still cant go to sleep during the nighttime that night. So tonight I tried to sleep from 12-5am and just tossed and turned , so here I am ! My hours basically go round and round,

Its hard because we want to do whatever we can to make whatever symptom is too tough go away. This I find is the hardest part, when a symptom, doesnt matter which one it is , is lets say over an 8/10 it becomes all too much to tolerate. I would try and do things to bring it down anyway I could . sometimes things would work and others it would not. The magnesium can help but as you know it wont take away the symptom thats foresure. Just like all the rests , it has to run its course..

You do decribe your symptoms pretty well! The elevator feeling I get alot ! I get that in my whole body , like right after you step off an elevator , you get that feeling where when you take a step everything is completely all out of sorts? I get rushes of warm and cold throughout all my body. I know that one!

feels like you drink a jug of poision everyday ? I would be nervous to take the dose aswell , I dont blame you , I just hope this is the lesser of two evils . IF you tapered off now it could be a trainwreck , although this is no picnic either I understand that.

OKay i know understand about the adderal , better to keep it steady for now, It could have been a counter punch to what the SSRIs were doing , very possible! I dont know if ADHD exists? maybe it does , I am skeptical now about all diagnosis. Maybe in extreme cases it does but most of the people getting these pills probably dont need them , THE DSM sets guidelines for things like that to include 80% of the population . Same with bi polar , everyone or almost everyone can qualify to be bi polar. If you ever look at a test that people fill out to see if they are bi polar its pretty funny. Its literally all normal human emotion. ITs very general and it works! people like to identify with things , too bad they dont know how dangerous the treatment is.

For you I think its a combination of all of the above! although I do think the reinstatement of the lex is the right decision. IT can still be stimulating though. But if you feel its making you much worse than its your call. One thing is that this is your life , you gotta do what you think is right . But I would probably give it a bit more time to see if it can steady out. Its not a easy decision I understand that . THe thing is , if you stop taking the LEX now it could be a very bumpy ride . The RI hopefully slows that down alot! I just know what Ive gone through is hell . and if I went back I would try to RI . BUt I was far out when I found this site. So maybe I dont RI. BUt if i was just a few weeks or a couple of months , I would 100% try to stabalize on something , then slowly taper off .

Zombies werent always cool!?? I gueess not ! hahah

Hey Mort81,

I have read and reread your replies attempting to respond, but oh, my brain. Weird little tingly sensation. Wouldn't it be nice if it were all those new synapses growing back? They are accompanied by this weird swooning sensation, however. Just plain odd. I think I would take this over the anxiety freight train though. Being superstitious, I have just knocked on wood. Don't want to tempt fate. I'll take no more of either, thank you very much.

Also, the noise! Were you a sensitive soul as well? I was watching some of the videos posted on the site, very informative although also made me very sad...the ones about withdrawal symptoms, etc. I had to lower the sound to next to nothing. So much for the soothing mood music. Then, there was this little Google Doodle of some guy singing, never did figure out who. Oh the pain. Muted that sucker as well. I typically have the news on in the background--admittedly not the best option for soothing depression--whilst I am on the computer--but ewww. Too much auditory stimulation. And that was part of my day, and you?

I don't know if you are just getting up, or just going to bed or some combination in between. I once had that kind of sleep pattern as well.

And now, I think I am going to attempt to go to bed, so very early. Unlike the recent past. Hopefully, I will be able to respond in a more cognizant manner.

I do so enjoy reading all your thoughts. Just helps me make it through another day. I hope yours has gone well, in whatever manner you spent it and with only happy teeth!

Down with anxiety!

take care,

JS

September 5, 2017

59 minutes ago, JS11 said:

Hey Mort81,

I have read and reread your replies attempting to respond, but oh, my brain. Weird little tingly sensation. Wouldn't it be nice if it were all those new synapses growing back? They are accompanied by this weird swooning sensation, however. Just plain odd. I think I would take this over the anxiety freight train though. Being superstitious, I have just knocked on wood. Don't want to tempt fate. I'll take no more of either, thank you very much.

Also, the noise! Were you a sensitive soul as well? I was watching some of the videos posted on the site, very informative although also made me very sad...the ones about withdrawal symptoms, etc. I had to lower the sound to next to nothing. So much for the soothing mood music. Then, there was this little Google Doodle of some guy singing, never did figure out who. Oh the pain. Muted that sucker as well. I typically have the news on in the background--admittedly not the best option for soothing depression--whilst I am on the computer--but ewww. Too much auditory stimulation. And that was part of my day, and you?

I don't know if you are just getting up, or just going to bed or some combination in between. I once had that kind of sleep pattern as well.

And now, I think I am going to attempt to go to bed, so very early. Unlike the recent past. Hopefully, I will be able to respond in a more cognizant manner.

I do so enjoy reading all your thoughts. Just helps me make it through another day. I hope yours has gone well, in whatever manner you spent it and with only happy teeth!

Down with anxiety!

take care,

JS

Its been okay thanks ! I am at the start of trying my 3rd attempt of tapering off my acid drug , they are not good drugs to be on longterm which I only fond out since the LEX WD started , tough to get off aswell. When I started them , I did need them because I was not willing to give up my excessive caffeine habit and "cheat meals". I did eat healthy meals back then aswell being into weightlifting as I was but I was also told these drugs are safe bla bla bla . First line of treatment in western medicine is always the heaviest and most extreme form. I wish I knew about naturopaths back then, I feel they are way more fit to deal with issues like this. So I am playing around with how to do it now . Theres about 150-180 very tiny beads in each one , and its tough to open the capsule without it breaking. So not the easiest drug to taper. The rebound acid is brutal , nobody can get that kinda acid naturally. Same like the freight train anxiety. You cant get that anxiety normally.

Im in the middle of my day now , really annoying for me I must say , I love day hours , Waking up around 9-10am. going to bed anywhere from 10-2. this is not one of my worst things ive dealt with in WD but I still dont like it.

I wasnt too sensitive to sound before this , maybe a brief period in my life I was . But for the most part it wasnt a problem until WD started, And I get it bad like that , I have had to spend plenty of days in a dark quiet room. I get the visual stimulation aswell , where ive had long periods of time without being able to watch TV, computer etc... Boy is odd to feel like that ? with every little sound so magnified ?? ITs really improved for me but its still not gone , The visualy stimulation is a bit harder for me now . Its really somewhat of a new symptom. I havent had either of these that long. BUt Going in a car with lights ,cars etc.. somedays I cant do it . Its over stimulating .I get a very slow drunk haze feeling. Its crazy. Not easy for the people in my household but they are good with it now .

And I know the headfog and how tough it can be to respond to everyone , Totally do it when you can .I wont be offended if I dont get a reply for a few days , I have to do that too sometimes. It all depends on the symptoms. Some days very easy to type and think etc.. other days extremely hard.

Ive seen most of the videos , they explain alot thats foresure ! I believe . Finding out exactly whats happening and what you can expect is a key to recovery.

I do watch lots of sports, movies and things that are generally funny , but when things are too stimulating its tough , gotta shut things off .

I think all those weird sensations are things like that happening , its all trying to adapt back to normal. The anxiety is a rough one , prob one of the hardest , I hope it lets up for you soon!

September 5, 2017

6 hours ago, JS11 said:

So we're drugged both sides of the border. So much for international relations, huh? No commercials but they get to you just the same. Baaaaaaa. I wonder if they have compared this. Are the yanks more into pharma because of the ads. or about the same as you? Would love to have those blasted things go away. The one with the little happy face on a placard? Maybe I need one of those on a popsickle stick. I think it would have a grrr or little wavy face on it at the moment.

A hockey fan, hmmmm. I went to my first, I don't know if only hockey game at age 11. Some free tickets for a school award or some such thing. I just remember this grey-haired grandma, hey, she could have been a prematurely grey 20 something, but every one looks old when you are a kid. The woman was screaming the F**** word. Back in the day, at least mine, it was not tossed around like it is now. I mean, hell was enough for my brothers to have a bar of soap for dinner and feast they did. I think that experience colored any potential future as a hockey fan. But I know you Canadians are mad for it. As mad as the Europeans are for soccer/football? If they have riots up yonder, we sure don't see them. We have too many violent events of our own to televise. Just look at our politics...enough to make anyone thing pharmaceuticals are the answer. NOOOOOOOO!

I do like men's college basketball. My college team does quite well and I typically follow them. The occasional football game. The Superbowl for the commercials. Typical stuff. I look at it as a socially acceptable way to express your emotions. Screaming your lungs out, I don't do this all the time, but people don't look oddly at you unless you are an obnoxious fan in quite the same way as if you did this, say, in the supermarket.

Oh ya its no different here , we are drugged so bad here, Any western doctor you see here , there first line of defense is drugs , its the same cycle no matter what you go in for or how old you are. If your under 10 its ADHD drugs , if your a teenager your probably being pushed towards antidepressants or the new craze of bi polar drugs. Benzos dont get prescribed as easy here from my experience. I think there are many reasons for that. One being they are used to get high with alchohol etc.. so docs are hesitant and two they dont really cost much , so the kickbacks arent high. But literally SSRI AND SNRI drugs get handed out like safe friendly vitamins.

They dont get us with the commercials but there are lots of campaigns here for mental health that promote being sick not weak . They try to tell you your sick and need drugs . "SAFE DRUGS"" Ya really safe eh!?? Sure mental health is real , I wont deny that , but the treatment is barbaric. at least if pharma companies were honest and doctors were smarter and they gave true informed consent , then we all wouldnt be so pissed off and harmed. Even though prescriptions are at an all time high and growing , I still think people are also turning more towards alternative medicine. Naturopath offices are growing it seems , they are great doctors but not for WD. They have a bit more knowledge on the aVG then western docs but they still usually dont help when it come to WD. When your not sensitive anymore than they can help with things to get your body back on track. Thats my opinion.

HAAHA i dont know what my wavey face would be , probably the most pissed off look you can have.

YA hockey is huge here! def as big as american or college football where you are . and as much as soccer in europe. We have no riots here though ! haha no hooligans ! But hockey parents can be awful! Its very competitive and loud. I remember some crazy things when I used to play involving parents ! But they have made it a rich persons sport here. Kids have alot of trouble affording it , so participation is on the decline. Its much easier/cheaper to pick up a basketball or soccer ball. It probably costs 5-6000$ a year to play competitive hockey for a young kid. thats a guess will have to check. where as other sports can be 500$

yes your politics are a nightmare!! I believe all politics is a nightmare , its what gang do you want to nominate. Big money makes the decisions behind the scenes. I hate polotics now. Maybe im sour but I believe if what were going through is covered up and ignored than what else is going on in the name of money.

Whos your team ? anything that can distract me from this mess I give two thumbs up! sports does it pretty good ! and movies and some shows.

September 5, 2017

8 hours ago, Mort81 said:

Its been okay thanks ! I am at the start of trying my 3rd attempt of tapering off my acid drug , they are not good drugs to be on longterm which I only fond out since the LEX WD started , tough to get off aswell. When I started them , I did need them because I was not willing to give up my excessive caffeine habit and "cheat meals". I did eat healthy meals back then aswell being into weightlifting as I was but I was also told these drugs are safe bla bla bla . First line of treatment in western medicine is always the heaviest and most extreme form. I wish I knew about naturopaths back then, I feel they are way more fit to deal with issues like this.   So I am playing around with how to do it now . Theres about 150-180 very tiny beads in each one , and its tough to open the capsule without it breaking. So not the easiest drug to taper. The rebound acid is brutal , nobody can get that kinda acid naturally. Same like the freight train anxiety. You cant get that anxiety normally.

Im in the middle of my day now , really annoying for me I must say , I love day hours , Waking up around 9-10am. going to bed anywhere from 10-2. this is not one of my worst things ive dealt with in WD but I still dont like it.

I wasnt too sensitive to sound before this , maybe a brief period in my life I was . But for the most part it wasnt a problem  until WD started, And I get it bad like that , I have had to spend plenty of days in a dark quiet room. I get the visual stimulation aswell , where ive had long periods of time without being able to watch TV, computer etc... Boy is odd to feel like that ? with every little sound so magnified ?? ITs really improved for me but its still not gone , The visualy stimulation is a bit harder for me now . Its really somewhat of a new symptom. I havent had either of these that long. BUt Going in a car with lights ,cars etc.. somedays I cant do it . Its over stimulating .I get a very slow drunk haze feeling. Its crazy. Not easy for the people in my household but they are good with it now .

And I know the headfog and how tough it can be to respond to everyone , Totally do it when you can .I wont be offended if I dont get a reply for a few days , I have to do that too sometimes. It all depends on the symptoms. Some days very easy to type and think etc.. other days extremely hard.

Ive seen most of the videos , they explain alot thats foresure ! I believe . Finding out exactly whats happening and what you can expect is a key to recovery.

I do watch lots of sports, movies and things that are generally funny , but when things are too stimulating its tough , gotta shut things off .

I think all those weird sensations are things like that happening , its all trying to adapt back to normal. The anxiety is a rough one , prob one of the hardest , I hope it lets up for you soon!

Goodmorning Mort81,

I was on acid drugs forever. Took lots of anti-inflammatories over the years and rotted my guts out the old fashioned way before giving up alcohol and coffee, which I adored. I was decaffeinated for a while, drinking what I call the bastardization of tea--foo flavors and such--as a good cup of decaf black tea just wasn't available. Now, caffeinated black tea is what I reach for all too often, though I haven't had the stomach for it lately. Just can't be bothered. I stopped taking Omeprozole--don't know what they call it up your way, rather suddenly after the whopper of an adverse reaction, maybe Februaryish. I wanted all of the toxins out of my body. I also read how it can contribute or lead to dementia? Hadn't recently gone back on anti-inffammatories but stopped those as well as those rot your innards horrible. I suppose my system wasn't as delicate and battered then. I ate a lot of ginger. Got these Asian candies that you can either chew or steep for a hot cup of ginger tea. The acid is brutal. I was lucky as it wasn't too bad for me.

So when people talk about beads, they are counting the little miniscule things inside the capsules. Oh my gosh! I think I tried to pull apart a capsule once in hopes of taking half the dose only to spill half of it all over the place. I have seen the posts on scales. Can your capsules be weighed? Does your pharmacist have any suggestions. That sounds very difficult, not to mention the horrendous rebound acid side-effects. No, that is NOT a natural occurrence. Have you found anything to soothe your stomach? Yes to the naturopaths. Although I have never been. I remember once a long time ago I asked my doctor what she thought? She would never bad mouth another doctor, not her style, but definitely not a fan. The Western medical mindset both patient and doctor. I have done acupuncture and energy therapy. Both were very helpful.

Are you still into weightlifting? I have been so very sedentary since this began. My body is not amused. Sore and achy. I have an exercise bike which I managed to do about 20 minutes yesterday. But that was a major accomplishment. Surprised how very "delicate?" I feel. Just shaky and unsteady. Disconcerting that this all came in a bottle with a prescription.

Yes, it is nice to be on a daytime schedule. Unless everyone you know is on the same schedule, makes it rather difficult to socialize. With the internet, I suppose you can talk to anyone most anywhere at all hours, but call me old fashioned, I do like good 'ole in person interaction as well.

The sensitivity is different that is for certain. I haven't driven too much and don't really want to either. Glad you now have some understanding in that regard. I suppose that is one of the things that so frightens me. Giving myself permission to heal at least for a little while longer, which is difficult, but I don't seem to have much of a choice as I am not very able to function--the dizziness is making it hard to be upright for long periods-- and taking care of life, which is so very challenging right now. Just don't know.

As far as responding, I have appreciated your every word. So very much. I read some of what I wrote to another member yesterday morning and thought, well that was an upper. Just seem to have an overwhelming sadness at present. So wanted to share but didn't want to bring the black cloud with me. Feeling so...uncertain and insecure. If that makes sense.

I hope the rest of your day is treating you well. Oh and the beginning of your next taper on the stomach stuff, I hope you can find some guidance for that. The same principals I would imagine. Don't know though. All those blasted drugs have side-effects. You've seen our commercials.

take good care, Mort81

JS

September 6, 2017

16 hours ago, JS11 said:

Goodmorning Mort81,

I was on acid drugs forever. Took lots of anti-inflammatories over the years and rotted my guts out the old fashioned way before giving up alcohol and coffee, which I adored. I was decaffeinated for a while, drinking what I call the bastardization of tea--foo flavors and such--as a good cup of decaf black tea just wasn't available. Now, caffeinated black tea is what I reach for all too often, though I haven't had the stomach for it lately. Just can't be bothered. I stopped taking Omeprozole--don't know what they call it up your way, rather suddenly after the whopper of an adverse reaction, maybe Februaryish. I wanted all of the toxins out of my body. I also read how it can contribute or lead to dementia? Hadn't recently gone back on anti-inffammatories but stopped those as well as those rot your innards horrible. I suppose my system wasn't as delicate and battered then. I ate a lot of ginger. Got these Asian candies that you can either chew or steep for a hot cup of ginger tea. The acid is brutal. I was lucky as it wasn't too bad for me.

So when people talk about beads, they are counting the little miniscule things inside the capsules. Oh my gosh! I think I tried to pull apart a capsule once in hopes of taking half the dose only to spill half of it all over the place. I have seen the posts on scales. Can your capsules be weighed? Does your pharmacist have any suggestions. That sounds very difficult, not to mention the horrendous rebound acid side-effects. No, that is NOT a natural occurrence. Have you found anything to soothe your stomach? Yes to the naturopaths. Although I have never been. I remember once a long time ago I asked my doctor what she thought? She would never bad mouth another doctor, not her style, but definitely not a fan. The Western medical mindset both patient and doctor. I have done acupuncture and energy therapy. Both were very helpful.

Are you still into weightlifting? I have been so very sedentary since this began. My body is not amused. Sore and achy. I have an exercise bike which I managed to do about 20 minutes yesterday. But that was a major accomplishment. Surprised how very "delicate?" I feel. Just shaky and unsteady. Disconcerting that this all came in a bottle with a prescription.

Yes, it is nice to be on a daytime schedule. Unless everyone you know is on the same schedule, makes it rather difficult to socialize. With the internet, I suppose you can talk to anyone most anywhere at all hours, but call me old fashioned, I do like good 'ole in person interaction as well.

The sensitivity is different that is for certain. I haven't driven too much and don't really want to either. Glad you now have some understanding in that regard. I suppose that is one of the things that so frightens me. Giving myself permission to heal at least for a little while longer, which is difficult, but I don't seem to have much of a choice as I am not very able to function--the dizziness is making it hard to be upright for long periods-- and taking care of life, which is so very challenging right now. Just don't know.

As far as responding, I have appreciated your every word. So very much. I read some of what I wrote to another member yesterday morning and thought, well that was an upper. Just seem to have an overwhelming sadness at present. So wanted to share but didn't want to bring the black cloud with me. Feeling so...uncertain and insecure. If that makes sense.

I hope the rest of your day is treating you well. Oh and the beginning of your next taper on the stomach stuff, I hope you can find some guidance for that. The same principals I would imagine. Don't know though. All those blasted drugs have side-effects. You've seen our commercials.

take good care, Mort81

JS

Hey JS goodmorning,

The sadness part , yes its very tough , It can be draining trying to fend off these symptoms day in and day out , I know when I used to get just a cold but the nasty one with sore throat , completley clogged up sinuses etc.. I would get down! I remember I used to think Its gonna take a week to get rid of this cold! Now with WD were looking at a much longer time frame and much higher severity. Its hard for anyone not to get down , The only way we wouldnt get down is if we were all compensated several millions of dollars to go through something this bad ? or maybe not even that ? This isnt even worth millions. The only thing i can think of us , is when we are back to normal , that one day life will be so much better than it would have been , had we not suffered? like maybe we go through life just going through motions? after something this bad maybe life is so good ,like off the charts good? The problem is its such a dog fight to get to that point , well it can be depending on how bad you get it. Some people recover fast and others not so fast.

uncertain and insecure ya that makes sense , along with vulnerable ? the unknown of this process makes it extremely difficult .

"The sensitivity is different that is for certain. I haven't driven too much and don't really want to either. Glad you now have some understanding in that regard. I suppose that is one of the things that so frightens me. Giving myself permission to heal at least for a little while longer, which is difficult, but I don't seem to have much of a choice as I am not very able to function--the dizziness is making it hard to be upright for long periods-- and taking care of life, which is so very challenging right now. Just don't know. "

I find this sentence above reflects alot of how my journey go started into this abyss of hell. I didnt allow myself to heal , mainly because I didnt know what was going on. But like you said having to take care of life while this starts especially if your symptoms are severe is pretty much impossible.

I have pretty much a 0 tolerance to exercise right now and for the most part of WD thats how its been. I think this has been one of the hardest parts for me. My body doesnt like even to walk much ,well my body does actually , its the head symptoms. the thick fog and haze plus dizzyness that knocks me on my arse . All of these symptoms intensify when I do the smallest of things like daily tasks. At the start of my journey it was my body saying no , but my brain was good to go! now its my brain saying no! and my body is good to go.

I used to like the face to face interaction aswell but WD makes that unenjoyable now at the moment

Oh wow so you did get off those PPIs ?? how long were you on them ? good for you! I have felt a bit like a prisoner to them for the last little while. I havent been able to get off , I did a CT when this started and my insides were being torched. I have managed to cut my dose in half successfully early in WD . but now the second half has been tricky. I have a way better diet now than I ever have but the waves I get promote acid. I have acid now with my pills and a good diet , when before WD started I had no acid with a crap diet and lots of coffee. So it tells me that WD is making this process so difficult.

I am stocked up with things like DGL And natural anti acids. I have the crap kind like Gaviscon and Zantac to use if I need. But I am waiting for my new empty capsules to come then Im take the next step. and yes I consume a ton of ginger too , its a staple in my diet. If I could only take one thing for my gut , it would be ginger.

Its tough because although I have a good diet I enjoy food so much that having to be very strict sucks! Wd is bad enough that we would like to get some enjoyment with food. Now with the taper I have to be careful .. Not fun! I just hope by end of the year I get off and it doesnt rebound too much.

Ya these drugs are only now being linked to tons of problems , But dont tell that to my GP ,she recently told me they ate safe to use longterm! lol . She wont be too helpful for me if I ask to get a lower dose. Im on my own now. Most western docs I find dont have much respect for natural ones. I would go to a natural one for 90% of future issues. I have no respect for western ones anymore. well not no respect , if someone needs surgery or life threatening things than ya they are amazing , but what I know now about this , I just dont even know how to process it anymore.

I was still having my daily coffees for the first 11 months in WD , Then I got hit with the nasty neuro Anxiety , Had to stop all caffiene after that . Was bummed out bigtime. Now I have it ever so rarely but its decaf coffee , green tea decaf . So im probably at most getting 10mg of caffiene. I used to have 1 or 2 coffees a day plus sometimes a preworkout drink which must have had some of that in it. I could drink a coffee before bed and fall asleep !

anyway have a good one

September 6, 2017

6 hours ago, Mort81 said:

Hey JS goodmorning,

The sadness part , yes its very tough , It can be draining trying to fend off these symptoms day in and day out , I know when I used to get just a cold but the nasty one with sore throat , completley clogged up sinuses etc.. I would get down! I remember I used to think Its gonna take a week to get rid of this cold! Now with WD were looking at a much longer time frame and much higher severity. Its hard for anyone not to get down , The only way we wouldnt get down is if we were all compensated several millions of dollars to go through something this bad ? or maybe not even that ? This isnt even worth millions. The only thing i can think of us , is when we are back to normal , that one day life will be so much better than it would have been , had we not suffered? like maybe we go through life just going through motions? after something this bad maybe life is so good ,like off the charts good? The problem is its such a dog fight to get to that point , well it can be depending on how bad you get it. Some people recover fast and others not so fast.

uncertain and insecure ya that makes sense , along with vulnerable ? the unknown of this process makes it extremely difficult .

"The sensitivity is different that is for certain. I haven't driven too much and don't really want to either. Glad you now have some understanding in that regard. I suppose that is one of the things that so frightens me. Giving myself permission to heal at least for a little while longer, which is difficult, but I don't seem to have much of a choice as I am not very able to function--the dizziness is making it hard to be upright for long periods-- and taking care of life, which is so very challenging right now. Just don't know. "

I find this sentence above reflects alot of how my journey go started into this abyss of hell. I didnt allow myself to heal , mainly because I didnt know what was going on. But like you said having to take care of life while this starts especially if your symptoms are severe is pretty much impossible.

I have pretty much a 0 tolerance to exercise right now and for the most part of WD thats how its been. I think this has been one of the hardest parts for me. My body doesnt like even to walk much ,well my body does actually , its the head symptoms. the thick fog and haze plus dizzyness that knocks me on my arse . All of these symptoms intensify when I do the smallest of things like daily tasks. At the start of my journey it was my body saying no , but my brain was good to go! now its my brain saying no! and my body is good to go.

I used to like the face to face interaction aswell but WD makes that unenjoyable now at the moment

Oh wow so you did get off those PPIs ?? how long were you on them ? good for you! I have felt a bit like a prisoner to them for the last little while. I havent been able to get off , I did a CT when this started and my insides were being torched. I have managed to cut my dose in half successfully early in WD . but now the second half has been tricky. I have a way better diet now than I ever have but the waves I get promote acid. I have acid now with my pills and a good diet , when before WD started I had no acid with a crap diet and lots of coffee. So it tells me that WD is making this process so difficult.

I am stocked up with things like DGL And natural anti acids. I have the crap kind like Gaviscon and Zantac to use if I need. But I am waiting for my new empty capsules to come then Im take the next step. and yes I consume a ton of ginger too , its a staple in my diet. If I could only take one thing for my gut , it would be ginger.

Its tough because although I have a good diet I enjoy food so much that having to be very strict sucks! Wd is bad enough that we would like to get some enjoyment with food. Now with the taper I have to be careful .. Not fun! I just hope by end of the year I get off and it doesnt rebound too much.

Ya these drugs are only now being linked to tons of problems , But dont tell that to my GP ,she recently told me they ate safe to use longterm! lol . She wont be too helpful for me if I ask to get a lower dose. Im on my own now. Most western docs I find dont have much respect for natural ones. I would go to a natural one for 90% of future issues. I have no respect for western ones anymore. well not no respect , if someone needs surgery or life threatening things than ya they are amazing , but what I know now about this , I just dont even know how to process it anymore.

I was still having my daily coffees for the first 11 months in WD , Then I got hit with the nasty neuro Anxiety , Had to stop all caffiene after that . Was bummed out bigtime. Now I have it ever so rarely but its decaf coffee , green tea decaf . So im probably at most getting 10mg of caffiene. I used to have 1 or 2 coffees a day plus sometimes a preworkout drink which must have had some of that in it. I could drink a coffee before bed and fall asleep !

anyway have a good one

Oh my gosh you are one of those, chug a coffee, well, speaking for my non-moderated self, and sleep? Amazing. Once, maybe, but now, oh, nothing after early evening. I did so adore coffee. Constantly had a cup in my hand, an appendage really. Back before all that foo-foo Starbucks stuff. Black. Odd that I only like my tea with milk. Different tastes I suppose. I like green tea as well. Caffeine and the acidic nature of coffee are why we had to part ways. Even the decaf threw me.

I did go off Omeprazole, was on other things too. Rather to offset the side-effects of the anti-inflammatory. I really don't know how long I was on them. Years and years. Fifteen, twenty? Not always consistently, some were as needed. It was after the scary adverse reaction that I just started cutting things out. I may have done an every other day taper. Not sure. But, I never thought I had bad acid symptoms, more stomach being rotted by Naproxen. Although I did have some when stopping. Rebound I'm assuming. I was lucky. As that burning acid is so very, very terrible. Yes, I lived on ginger for some time. I know I also did the Apple Cider Vinegar thing for a while too. I have read of all its healing properties. Not sure as I have never been very consistent and when your tummy is rebelling hard to think about putting something acidic in it. I tried the DGL but I loathe black licorice. I know there were some other things at the health food store too.

I adore food too and it does make it so very frustrating when your body rebels. At present, I haven't really been eating much but protein drinks, nothing sounds very good. Although last night I made some canned chili. Ran out of the Costco packaged, organic kind which is simple and fairly good. I swear it gave me a headache. All those ingredients listed in small print on the label that you can't read no doubt. I noticed this before too, prior to all of this starting. So apparently many of us are now sensitive souls. I wonder if everyone has this difficulty.

Yes, millions of dollars, I don't know if it would be enough. Although some compensation for the years of reduced productivity, missed opportunities, life, that we have lost. No, there is no price but an acknowledgement might help. And yes, I had health issues for years, Fibromyalgia. I remember when I woke up one morning and didn't hurt. And the next day, and the next. It was so very freeing. If a bad day came, it was so very hard to remember that this was not going to be forever. A brief setback. I do so hope for that for all of us out there. You appreciate the little things like not waking up with anxiety or a tingly brain. What a welcome relief they will both be. Going through the ringer tends to do that, or hopefully it will. The small, as the saying goes, that we often take for granted.

I made myself get on my exercise bike again yesterday. My legs were just aching. I think I did 25 minutes and it felt like major accomplishment. I suppose it was really. It is difficult when you are used to being a mover. I had such a difficult time with that in the past, wanting so to exercise, do something but not being able to bear it. I have some little hand weights by my bed, which I made myself do the other day. Ever so gently, as I know it is beneficial if I don't go all wild. The thought of it can be so very overwhelming though.

The dizziness has been brutal for me as well. Hearing that even small tasks knock you for the proverbial loop makes me feel, well, not so alone. Like having a really bad flu and just being totally wiped out and only realizing how bad off you were when you start to get better. My immune system is so delicate

September 6, 2017

Just now, JS11 said:

Oh my gosh you are one of those, chug a coffee, well, speaking for my non-moderated self, and sleep? Amazing. Once, maybe, but now, oh, nothing after early evening. I did so adore coffee. Constantly had a cup in my hand, an appendage really. Back before all that foo-foo Starbucks stuff. Black. Odd that I only like my tea with milk. Different tastes I suppose. I like green tea as well. Caffeine and the acidic nature of coffee are why we had to part ways. Even the decaf threw me.

I did go off Omeprazole, was on other things too. Rather to offset the side-effects of the anti-inflammatory. I really don't know how long I was on them. Years and years. Fifteen, twenty? Not always consistently, some were as needed. It was after the scary adverse reaction that I just started cutting things out. I may have done an every other day taper. Not sure. But, I never thought I had bad acid symptoms, more stomach being rotted by Naproxen. Although I did have some when stopping. Rebound I'm assuming. I was lucky. As that burning acid is so very, very terrible. Yes, I lived on ginger for some time. I know I also did the Apple Cider Vinegar thing for a while too. I have read of all its healing properties. Not sure as I have never been very consistent and when your tummy is rebelling hard to think about putting something acidic in it. I tried the DGL but I loathe black licorice. I know there were some other things at the health food store too.

I adore food too and it does make it so very frustrating when your body rebels. At present, I haven't really been eating much but protein drinks, nothing sounds very good. Although last night I made some canned chili. Ran out of the Costco packaged, organic kind which is simple and fairly good. I swear it gave me a headache. All those ingredients listed in small print on the label that you can't read no doubt. I noticed this before too, prior to all of this starting. So apparently many of us are now sensitive souls. I wonder if everyone has this difficulty.

Yes, millions of dollars, I don't know if it would be enough. Although some compensation for the years of reduced productivity, missed opportunities, life, that we have lost. No, there is no price but an acknowledgement might help. And yes, I had health issues for years, Fibromyalgia. I remember when I woke up one morning and didn't hurt. And the next day, and the next. It was so very freeing. If a bad day came, it was so very hard to remember that this was not going to be forever. A brief setback. I do so hope for that for all of us out there. You appreciate the little things like not waking up with anxiety or a tingly brain. What a welcome relief they will both be. Going through the ringer tends to do that, or hopefully it will. The small, as the saying goes, that we often take for granted.

I made myself get on my exercise bike again yesterday. My legs were just aching. I think I did 25 minutes and it felt like major accomplishment. I suppose it was really. It is difficult when you are used to being a mover. I had such a difficult time with that in the past, wanting so to exercise, do something but not being able to bear it. I have some little hand weights by my bed, which I made myself do the other day. Ever so gently, as I know it is beneficial if I don't go all wild. The thought of it can be so very overwhelming though.

The dizziness has been brutal for me as well. Hearing that even small tasks knock you for the proverbial loop makes me feel, well, not so alone. Like having a really bad flu and just being totally wiped out and only realizing how bad off you were when you start to get better. My immune system is so delicate

as well. (Ahhhhhh, something happened and this just posted.) I think I will try to finish later. Going to lie down a bit.

take care,

JS

September 6, 2017

On 03/09/2017 at 11:16 PM, JS11 said:

Thank you for your well wishes Flowers. Your name caught my eye. I had some figures on my wall as a child, still have them in fact, with Bambi and of course, Flower the skunk. Maybe that is why it caught my eye and made me smile.

Yes, so much kindness has been shared with me. Helps to ease that alone and panicky feeling. I am getting used to going around on the site and must admit it feels a little odd to read all these things at first, not wanting to invade others' privacy, but it is very interesting and hopeful as well.

I have never been to Spain but once lived in London so long ago. Whenever I see anyone who is from abroad, it always gives me a boost. How amazing it is that we are all over the world. I am learning what some of the same drugs are called in different places too.

Take care,

It is lovely to meet you,

JS.

Ha Ha!

Not sure I want to be remembered for a skunk!lol! At least Flower the Skunk was a pretty cute skunk so that can't be bad!

Hope you are doing OK?

Yes we are widespread group aren't we? All with one thing in common though - the damage these drugs have done to us.

Wish we could have met under better circumstances but so glad there is such good support and lovely people here who understand.

I am British and lived on the South Coast in England about a couple of hours drive from London. Came here many years ago and have no regrets.

Take care.

Flowers xxx

September 7, 2017

3 hours ago, Flowers said:

Ha Ha!

Not sure I want to be remembered for a skunk!lol! At least Flower the Skunk was a pretty cute skunk so that can't be bad!

Hope you are doing OK?

Yes we are widespread group aren't we? All with one thing in common though - the damage these drugs have done to us.

Wish we could have met under better circumstances but so glad there is such good support and lovely people here who understand.

I am British and lived on the South Coast in England about a couple of hours drive from London. Came here many years ago and have no regrets.

Take care.

Flowers xxx

Well, he IS a very cute skunk so it was meant with the greatest affection. I actually have a couple little skunks who live in the bushes in my backyard and eat the squirrels' peanuts. They are so very sweet! But I do keep a distance.

Am I doing OK? Well, hmmm. Another member and I, a Brit, were discussing British weather, how it can change 4 times in one day. So, I am the weather: Stormy and overcast, sporadic showers, a brief glimpse of sunshine peaking through the clouds when new friends respond to your messages, and blast! I could sure use some "freshing" winds. I made the mistake yesterday of actually uttering out loud, "I'd take depression over anxiety any day." What WAS I thinking. No, I take it back! I take it back! Be careful what you wish for. Well, it wasn't a wish exactly. But I am going to try and remain mute about any future requests.

And how are YOU doing? Beautifully I hope.

Oh I so miss London and do regret ever leaving. I am so happy that you love where you are.

Yes, to widespread, worldwide damage. Rather astounds me really. The more I read, the more I realize. But such comfort in the numbers--knowing you aren't alone. And no, it isn't just a resurgence of whatever and the heck doctors thought it was in the beginning.

A question if I may: We are on cousin RX's, escitalopram and citalopram (think I started with that one first), are you doing or have you done a a liquid taper? I ask as I am on a combination of the two and trying to figure out if the liquid is messing with me (immediate anxiety after I take it), so I don't want to. Just curious. So many things to learn.

I think Spain is 9 hours ahead of me as I am on Pacific Standard Time. So, you are probably or hopefully, sleeping.

May it be a restful one.

take care, Flower.

JS

September 7, 2017

7 hours ago, JS11 said:

as well. (Ahhhhhh, something happened and this just posted.) I think I will try to finish later. Going to lie down a bit.

take care,

JS

Hi again Mort81,

I hope your day went well. I know you said you have a good diet and somewhere on this site I read about trying to eliminate dairy, sugar and maybe gluten? I know I didn't make it up. Have you eliminated any of those things or do you aspire to? I was off sugar for years, had one chocolate chip cookie, and it was all over. Not that I am a fiend, but I have been known to mow down brownie batter--so much better than the finished product. Wish we had those lovely little chocolate tea biscuits here. Probably do somewhere but no doubt exorbitantly expensive. When I was on the Lex, I got this great urge to feast at around 7 or 8pm. I'm presuming it may be related to Cortisol, but I just wondered if you had any similar experiences? Read that carbohydrate craving have also been associated with Lexapro, which explains a lot too. When I first discontinued this stuff, weight just came off. Never been an issue prior to all the pills. I am not quite to fighting form, but so close and do not want to go down that road. Maybe the resurgence of cravings, means I am stabilizing. That I can do without. The cravings not the stabilization .

Vulnerability is definitely the right word and the unknown future too. The slightest thing just wounds me, deeply. And as for my rather bold statement about interacting with others, I want a do-over. I meet with someone for the Doctor's office who was going to help me fill out some paperwork. I have just been immobilized truly. It seemed unconquerable. This kind soul penciled in two hours. I think it took 3 and a half? Thankfully, she knows some of what is going on, whether she agrees or not uncertain, but she did seem supportive. But oh my, I was all over the place. Couldn't focus, one topic to the next with no real symmetry. My train of thought wasn't just off track, the baby derailed. Throw in some tears for added mortification. Then I felt absolutely foolish. Apologized profusely, more than once. Such an attractive trait. She said, "Those are your thoughts, not mine," and once, "That's you not me." Um, yes, I know. That's the problem. Ugh. I even feel sheepish sharing this. (You DID mention sheep earlier, though in another context.) Sensitive, table for one. The above cannot become a repressed memory soon enough!

How did you fare today? I hope good successes for you.

Oh, when does hockey season start? I know there is usually ice involved but hey, they ski indoors in Dubai too (saw pictures, never been,) and, I vaguely remember the Stanley cup being on but my time frame is so very confused. It is sad that they/powers that be, are making hockey a rich person's sport. Just ruination. Yes, I suppose a basketball or soccer ball are much more accessible and can be used most anywhere a kid can go and some places they probably shouldn't, but still.....

How did you find out about this site? I am not much of a technology all the time person--even though I have been glued to the computer of late--but truly lucked out with Google. So very glad!!

Thank you for being there, Mort81,

take care,

JS

September 7, 2017

22 hours ago, JS11 said:

Oh my gosh you are one of those, chug a coffee, well, speaking for my non-moderated self, and sleep? Amazing. Once, maybe, but now, oh, nothing after early evening. I did so adore coffee. Constantly had a cup in my hand, an appendage really. Back before all that foo-foo Starbucks stuff. Black. Odd that I only like my tea with milk. Different tastes I suppose. I like green tea as well. Caffeine and the acidic nature of coffee are why we had to part ways. Even the decaf threw me.

I did go off Omeprazole, was on other things too. Rather to offset the side-effects of the anti-inflammatory. I really don't know how long I was on them. Years and years. Fifteen, twenty? Not always consistently, some were as needed. It was after the scary adverse reaction that I just started cutting things out. I may have done an every other day taper. Not sure. But, I never thought I had bad acid symptoms, more stomach being rotted by Naproxen. Although I did have some when stopping. Rebound I'm assuming. I was lucky. As that burning acid is so very, very terrible. Yes, I lived on ginger for some time. I know I also did the Apple Cider Vinegar thing for a while too. I have read of all its healing properties. Not sure as I have never been very consistent and when your tummy is rebelling hard to think about putting something acidic in it. I tried the DGL but I loathe black licorice. I know there were some other things at the health food store too.

I adore food too and it does make it so very frustrating when your body rebels. At present, I haven't really been eating much but protein drinks, nothing sounds very good. Although last night I made some canned chili. Ran out of the Costco packaged, organic kind which is simple and fairly good. I swear it gave me a headache. All those ingredients listed in small print on the label that you can't read no doubt. I noticed this before too, prior to all of this starting. So apparently many of us are now sensitive souls. I wonder if everyone has this difficulty.

Yes, millions of dollars, I don't know if it would be enough. Although some compensation for the years of reduced productivity, missed opportunities, life, that we have lost. No, there is no price but an acknowledgement might help. And yes, I had health issues for years, Fibromyalgia. I remember when I woke up one morning and didn't hurt. And the next day, and the next. It was so very freeing. If a bad day came, it was so very hard to remember that this was not going to be forever. A brief setback. I do so hope for that for all of us out there. You appreciate the little things like not waking up with anxiety or a tingly brain. What a welcome relief they will both be. Going through the ringer tends to do that, or hopefully it will. The small, as the saying goes, that we often take for granted.

I made myself get on my exercise bike again yesterday. My legs were just aching. I think I did 25 minutes and it felt like major accomplishment. I suppose it was really. It is difficult when you are used to being a mover. I had such a difficult time with that in the past, wanting so to exercise, do something but not being able to bear it. I have some little hand weights by my bed, which I made myself do the other day. Ever so gently, as I know it is beneficial if I don't go all wild. The thought of it can be so very overwhelming though.

The dizziness has been brutal for me as well. Hearing that even small tasks knock you for the proverbial loop makes me feel, well, not so alone. Like having a really bad flu and just being totally wiped out and only realizing how bad off you were when you start to get better. My immune system is so delicate

Hey JS ,

Yes the dizzyness is quite profound to say the least! I didnt even get it until very late into WD. Infact I used to go for massage therapy and one time got a very rough massage , and I had the worst dizzyness for a month, It went away after that only to return about a year later .. This time didnt last only a month and was stronger than ever thought possible.

It good that you can do a bit of exercise ! Just dont push to much if it doesnt feel good but if it feels good then go for it ! I think light weights also a good idea if you can. But dont get to overwhelmed. Its very difficult when you used to being a mover ! I would take my gym bag to work and go after work , I was known for that at . I would say maybe 4-5 times a week Id do something physical. But during WD Ive just had it so bad , in one way or another my body or brain has been in so much pain or dysfunction ?that i can feel doing anything is not good. So tough for me . NOt that id trade these symptoms for worse mental symptoms , Im sure if I had it the other way around I would be begging for my mental symptoms to go away. Its tough but we dont choose the symptoms or symptom severity we get in WD.

I would say a very common symptom is being sensitive to foods , probably one of the more common ones on here . I dont know the exact reason but maybe its that most of these drugs are heavy powered anti-histamines. So when we get off its a chain reaction of becoming sensitive to histamine? not sure but I know its very common. Just like your organic chili if I react funny to things . I bough a soda called Zevia , dont know if you have it in states. everytime I drink one of these I get horrible pains in my gut . I have no idea why. But for some reason I can drink Coke or diet coke or anything of that nature and it doesnt do that . Heres the ingredient list https://www.zevia.com/products/soda/ginger-ale .. The only thing I can think of is a sugar alchohol in some . But I dont know , all I know is we react very funny to things. I also tried melatonin to regulate my sleep , I forget how much mg I tried. BUt I was drunk for about 18 hrs. couldnt sleep at all , felt so hung over. I cant get over the weirdness of what were going through . THe weirdest things will happen to you .

I just started making protein shakes again but I bloat fast ! I bought some grassfed whey which is not denatured . its high quality , and I mix it with coconut milk and kale ,avacado and berries. everytime I bloat. I think I need veggie protein but I dont like it! Or forget the protein and add some egg yolks. But I like creamy consistency you get with the powder.

Very happy you got away from the PPI , you were similiar to me , had the reaction then started cutting things out because you didnt know what was causing what, good thing your stomach or esophagus weathered the storm! Ive been on them only about half as long as you but this has been a tough one! When going out becomes easier I would go to my naturpath and come up with a plan , thats if doing it on my own now doesnt work. BUt I want to get off by end of the year. Had enough of Pharma for the rest of my life. My DGL pills taste good ! but ya it does have that black licorice taste! The apple cider works good I think if you dont have the acid shooting up or are in PPI WD. Like if it was in pill form ? I use Enzymes which have HCL acid and I have digestive bitters that I use frequently , But Even with those 2 things I still burp up my food alot . ITs the strength of my waves is still strong so I feel my body cant do so many things at once , I know digestion is a big process for the body .

Coffee was my favorite part of the day food or drink wise ! I was that guy , loved it . I couldnt go to work without it. I couldnt get up without one ! I havent had a reg coffee in a longtime . And from what I read its tough on the adrenals. But it took me awhile to give it up . I actually like my tea with milk too! black tea that is . green tea gotta be plain or honey and lemon. Coffee has to be one of the most acidic things you could have along with the other foods that I love! Pizza sauce and Chocolate ! FML!!

September 7, 2017

4 minutes ago, Mort81 said:

Hey JS ,

Yes the dizzyness is quite profound to say the least! I didnt even get it until very late into WD. Infact I used to go for massage therapy and one time got a very rough massage , and I had the worst dizzyness for a month, It went away after that only to return about a year later .. This time didnt last only a month and was stronger than ever thought possible.

It good that you can do a bit of exercise ! Just dont push to much if it doesnt feel good but if it feels good then go for it ! I think light weights also a good idea if you can. But dont get to overwhelmed. Its very difficult when you used to being a mover ! I would take my gym bag to work and go after work , I was known for that at . I would say maybe 4-5 times a week Id do something physical. But during WD Ive just had it so bad , in one way or another my body or brain has been in so much pain or dysfunction ?that i can feel doing anything is not good. So tough for me . NOt that id trade these symptoms for worse mental symptoms , Im sure if I had it the other way around I would be begging for my mental symptoms to go away. Its tough but we dont choose the symptoms or symptom severity we get in WD.

I would say a very common symptom is being sensitive to foods , probably one of the more common ones on here . I dont know the exact reason but maybe its that most of these drugs are heavy powered anti-histamines. So when we get off its a chain reaction of becoming sensitive to histamine? not sure but I know its very common. Just like your organic chili if I react funny to things . I bough a soda called Zevia , dont know if you have it in states. everytime I drink one of these I get horrible pains in my gut . I have no idea why. But for some reason I can drink Coke or diet coke or anything of that nature and it doesnt do that . Heres the ingredient list https://www.zevia.com/products/soda/ginger-ale .. The only thing I can think of is a sugar alchohol in some . But I dont know , all I know is we react very funny to things. I also tried melatonin to regulate my sleep , I forget how much mg I tried. BUt I was drunk for about 18 hrs. couldnt sleep at all , felt so hung over. I cant get over the weirdness of what were going through . THe weirdest things will happen to you .

I just started making protein shakes again but I bloat fast ! I bought some grassfed whey which is not denatured . its high quality , and I mix it with coconut milk and kale ,avacado and berries. everytime I bloat. I think I need veggie protein but I dont like it! Or forget the protein and add some egg yolks. But I like creamy consistency you get with the powder.

Very happy you got away from the PPI , you were similiar to me , had the reaction then started cutting things out because you didnt know what was causing what, good thing your stomach or esophagus weathered the storm! Ive been on them only about half as long as you but this has been a tough one! When going out becomes easier I would go to my naturpath and come up with a plan , thats if doing it on my own now doesnt work. BUt I want to get off by end of the year. Had enough of Pharma for the rest of my life. My DGL pills taste good ! but ya it does have that black licorice taste! The apple cider works good I think if you dont have the acid shooting up or are in PPI WD. Like if it was in pill form ? I use Enzymes which have HCL acid and I have digestive bitters that I use frequently , But Even with those 2 things I still burp up my food alot . ITs the strength of my waves is still strong so I feel my body cant do so many things at once , I know digestion is a big process for the body .

Coffee was my favorite part of the day food or drink wise ! I was that guy , loved it . I couldnt go to work without it. I couldnt get up without one ! I havent had a reg coffee in a longtime . And from what I read its tough on the adrenals. But it took me awhile to give it up . I actually like my tea with milk too! black tea that is . green tea gotta be plain or honey and lemon. Coffee has to be one of the most acidic things you could have along with the other foods that I love! Pizza sauce and Chocolate ! FML!!

Hey Mort81,

I'm was reading in here about in the diet section lots of information of which you are probably aware on the causes and some suggestions. I saw that HCL acid was one of them as well as Pepsin? You seem to be on the right track. After reading that section, it just makes one again question all the pills people are handed out which don't solve the problem but mask it and cause addiction to a pill.

I think that the liquid form of Lex. was producing a great deal of anxiety. I know it started when I first switched to this form, so yesterday I took a 7.25 tablet or as close as I could split it to that, and 0.6mg of liquid. I want to try and be on the same dose but find it hard to calculate even with the syringe. Same amount today. Not feeling the overall chest freight train but just weird all sensations, not quite sure how to describe them. Dizzy, oh that one just knocks me over. So, your dizziness didn't come on at first but hit you later and then resurfaced again after a month? How about now? Is it gone or has it dissipated any? Feel that weak fluey kind of feeling. Just so very scared as I have to go back to work next week. And I am quite terrified. I don't have a permanent position, which I am looking for in another field, well, I was until this started. Going to different places most everyday, with the constant change, unfamiliar people and settings, is crazy making. Don't need more of that than I have already. Oh, I so want a consistent, stable environment. Trying not to set myself up but need to make money too. That life stuff. How did you function in the outside world with the dizziness and other withdrawal symptoms? Just full of fear, Mort81. Trying to focus on positives a bit tough right now.

I cannot imagine exercise at the moment. I had to make myself as my legs were stiff from just lying in bed and not moving about too much. And no, I don't want to overdo anything.

When I first started eliminating all these things from my body, I wanted to get healthy too. Suppose just feeling better physically prompted me to do so. I did some juicing and added a protein powder but that was time consuming. Had ordered some juices with protein, a Groupon deal before, and ordered those when they had specials. It was so very easy and you just nice not to have to think about it, but rather unthaw and drink. I haven't had any nasty side effects with any of those luckily. The protein drinks I have been using are just some chocolate ones I got at Costco. I have been living on those as food just hasn't sounded very good. A little fruit tastes good but otherwise, can't be bothered.

Ya, I wonder why that is that black tea goes with milk but with green tea, not so much. Maybe it's just the odd greenish color. Looks weird and not very palatable. Oh chocolate! Need we say more.

take care and have a lovely day,

JS

September 7, 2017

Has anyone noticed an increase in W/D symptoms, specifically anxiety, after taking medicine in liquid form? When I switched to all liquid form of Escitalopram originally, I noticed a surge of anxiety immediately after taking it. Eventually switched back to tablet form. Lots of other medicine changes before finding S.A. Was trying to stabilize my dose after going up and down so frequently, but found that the anxiety was overpowering every time I took the liquid form. I just changed to mostly tablet 7.25mg and 0.6mg of the liquid. When I have stabilized, I will then be able to eliminate the liquid first. Any thoughts from anyone on their reactions to liquid and if anyone did a combination of doses?

thank you,

JS

September 7, 2017

21 hours ago, Flowers said:

Ha Ha!

Not sure I want to be remembered for a skunk!lol! At least Flower the Skunk was a pretty cute skunk so that can't be bad!

Hope you are doing OK?

Yes we are widespread group aren't we? All with one thing in common though - the damage these drugs have done to us.

Wish we could have met under better circumstances but so glad there is such good support and lovely people here who understand.

I am British and lived on the South Coast in England about a couple of hours drive from London. Came here many years ago and have no regrets.

Take care.

Flowers xxx

Hello again Flowers, I hope your day is treating you well.

I am still trying to figure out the etiquette of how to post things on threads and such. I have only corresponded with a couple of people and am trying to reach out to get to know others, so many of whom have gone through so much.

I started reading your thread and felt such comfort and an easing of that lonely feeling which has seemed to take residence of late. So many things you have written about describe my feelings and the things happening within me. My body seems so very foreign. I am able to walk unassisted but am experiencing a rather constant state of dizziness which makes standing for long periods of time difficult if not impossible without clutching onto something for stability. The anxiety, the tears, and yes the inability to be around loud noise, all are present, although not always consistently. Each day is an unknown as I suppose it is in all things, but especially when you don't know how you or your body will react.

I just wanted to say thank you for all that you shared. It has helped tremendously. Having a difficult time today. So much fear of the future and my ability to function. Trying to look at the bright spots, kind souls who are on this journey reaching out, is definitely a big one.

take care,

JS

September 8, 2017

I'm so very confused. I just wanted to post a question and I am supposed to do this in my introductions and updates page, which seems simple enough, but I have just been replying to people's earlier posts. Is that how you do it? Just reply to this topic. There must be a more straight forward way? Thank you, I'm just wanting to ask for guidance and opinions of those more experienced souls.

thank you,

JS11

September 8, 2017

Hi Mort81,

Are you able to help? How do you post in your introduction and updates page? I wanted to ask a question, think I may have actually succeeded but I seem just to be hitting reply to people's posts. GRRRRR! There has to be an easier way. Any guidance.

technologically challenged,

take care,

JS

September 8, 2017

The last 5 posts you have made are all responses in your own Intro topic.

There is no need to quote a previous post. Just click in the Reply Box at the bottom of the page and type then hit Submit Reply (bottom right of the Reply Box)

September 8, 2017

Thank you so Chessie Cat!

I'll give it a go.

take care,

JS11

September 8, 2017

I was reading Alto's post About reinstating and stabilizing to reduce withdrawal symptoms.

She states that reinstating is best done "immediately..the more time that passes, the likely it is to work ' I did one fast taper of 20 mg Escitalopram doctor's instructions, crashed and reinstated at the original dose a week later. I began tapering again and successfully eliminated Escitalopram in September 2016 after 8 months. I was also tapering another at the same time.

Four months later, I reinstated the Escitalopram at 5mg, however, when looking at this now, I believe it was the symptoms from the withdrawal of RX #2 , which prompted this decision, not because of any symptoms caused by discontinuation of the Escitalopram. I continued to taper both drugs.

Per Alto, "reinstating at a low dose reduces the risk of severe adverse reactions in case reinstatement does not work...Experiencing withdrawal may have sensitized you to drugs and a larger dose will cause an adverse reaction.

I started experiencing severe and new withdrawal symptoms at 3.75mg of Escitalopram. Again, I was also tapering another drug at the same time. I was given the first of 4 additional medications to assist with these withdrawal symptoms, and experienced negative reactions to each one. I had also had a previous and extremely severe reaction to an anti-biotic and another A.D. a few months prior to this. My body has truly become sensitized.

Shortly after having an adverse reaction to the first new drug, I jumped from 4mg Escitalopram to 10mg. And then went back and forth with the dosage amount. Per Alto (sorry I don't know how to do the quotes) You want to be taking only the lowest EFFECTIVE dose...Your receptors may have adjusted somewhat (unregulated) during the time you were tapering or had withdrawal symptoms...

If, upon reinstatement, you very soon feel worse, most likely you were sensitized to the drug and need to take a smaller dosage or, possibly, none at all. Sometimes reinstatement does not work. The nervous system has taken such a hard hit from withdrawal, it's destabilized beyond whatever effect effect the drug might had had.

Sometimes reinstatement not only does not work, IT CAUSES AN ADVERSE REACTION FROM A NERVOUS SYSTEM SENSITIZED BY WITHDRAWAL. IF YOU HAVE AN IMMEDIATE BAD REACTION, REDUCE OR STOP TAKING THE DRUG.

I understand that each person's situation is unique, mine as well. There are so many other factors at play. I added new medications--All of which were eliminated. Each produced horrific side-effects. I have did a drastic updose of Escitalopram as well. I also went from liquid only to liquid and tablet form of the Escitalopram. Each time I ingested the liquid, the side-effects (anxiety, numbness, dizziness, tingling) were almost immediate. Yesterday, I dropped from 3.5mg of the liquid to 0.6. I am taking 7.25 mg in tablet form. for a total of 7.85mg. Eliminating the liquid did alleviate the immediate of anxiety. That is good.

My question is: So now what? Do I do a fastish taper. Try 5mg, hold for a bit and see if some of the symptoms dissipate? I am more confused than ever about my path. I know I need to stabilize and believe in the slow and steady part, but I also know the adverse reaction part too.

I am unable to function. The dizziness prevents me from standing for long periods of time. I am shaky and have flu like symptoms. Depression, crying, fear, and many other emotions are all present as well. I have read about mindfullness, patience, time, and that many others are experiencing horrible withdrawal as well. I have experience in another area. I do understand and I know it is a process. I also know it is my decision but I would appreciate all thoughts and guidance if at all possible. I realize we all have life responsibilities and are doing the best we can under difficult circumstances.

I am unable to work and must return soon but I am terrified that I will be unable to function. I care for my elderly father and am barely able to do so. Thank goodness for baked potatoes. There are many other which are causes of great concern and extreme stress as well. All major life things.

And yes, I also read the part about it being a crap shoot.

thank you so much,

JS11

Edited September 8, 2017 by ChessieCat
bolded question

September 8, 2017

Hi JS11 ,I came over to your thread to say hi ,you introduced yourself on another thread .

In relation to the post you quoted ,it is extremely tricky to put up with sympathy about mediocre ailments when we are going through hell .

in hindsight I should of kept my situation to myself as much as I could ,its caused a lot of arguments ,the day my mother said "go see a professional ",I snapped and said going to one of them has me like this ,but I cant really blame her ,she is indoctrinated like others about doctor spellbinding .

I will say though she has been very supportive and ive learned to except it from family .

If we look at it on an human instinct basis ,when we tell people how painful it is they just switch off maybe wanting to protect themselves .plus stigma takes a long time to dissipate in society .

we have to be very careful not to dispel loved ones ailments though because no matter how bad we are they are human beings with feelings also .

this what we go through is on an astonishing level of suffering so to avoid the poor me faces of the people around you ,ide advise sticking to support from the fellow victims on this site .

if you do have support from a loved one or friend good but they could never understand so we shouldn't expect the same level of understanding or sympathy .

good luck in your recovery and take care

PB

September 8, 2017

Hey JS sorry I was sleeping , did Chessie Cat sum it up for you ? I think you just hit submit reply at the bottom , same like you would when you are replying to another persons thread. Dont worry im no tech expert either !

September 8, 2017

15 hours ago, JS11 said:

Hey Mort81,

I'm was reading in here about in the diet section lots of information of which you are probably aware on the causes and some suggestions. I saw that HCL acid was one of them as well as Pepsin? You seem to be on the right track. After reading that section, it just makes one again question all the pills people are handed out which don't solve the problem but mask it and cause addiction to a pill.

I think that the liquid form of Lex. was producing a great deal of anxiety. I know it started when I first switched to this form, so yesterday I took a 7.25 tablet or as close as I could split it to that, and 0.6mg of liquid. I want to try and be on the same dose but find it hard to calculate even with the syringe. Same amount today. Not feeling the overall chest freight train but just weird all sensations, not quite sure how to describe them. Dizzy, oh that one just knocks me over. So, your dizziness didn't come on at first but hit you later and then resurfaced again after a month? How about now? Is it gone or has it dissipated any? Feel that weak fluey kind of feeling. Just so very scared as I have to go back to work next week. And I am quite terrified. I don't have a permanent position, which I am looking for in another field, well, I was until this started. Going to different places most everyday, with the constant change, unfamiliar people and settings, is crazy making. Don't need more of that than I have already. Oh, I so want a consistent, stable environment. Trying not to set myself up but need to make money too. That life stuff. How did you function in the outside world with the dizziness and other withdrawal symptoms? Just full of fear, Mort81. Trying to focus on positives a bit tough right now.

I cannot imagine exercise at the moment. I had to make myself as my legs were stiff from just lying in bed and not moving about too much. And no, I don't want to overdo anything.

When I first started eliminating all these things from my body, I wanted to get healthy too. Suppose just feeling better physically prompted me to do so. I did some juicing and added a protein powder but that was time consuming. Had ordered some juices with protein, a Groupon deal before, and ordered those when they had specials. It was so very easy and you just nice not to have to think about it, but rather unthaw and drink. I haven't had any nasty side effects with any of those luckily. The protein drinks I have been using are just some chocolate ones I got at Costco. I have been living on those as food just hasn't sounded very good. A little fruit tastes good but otherwise, can't be bothered.

Ya, I wonder why that is that black tea goes with milk but with green tea, not so much. Maybe it's just the odd greenish color. Looks weird and not very palatable. Oh chocolate! Need we say more.

take care and have a lovely day,

JS

Black tea goes so well with milk ! , I used to have it all the time with cookies at my grandmas house , she was from England and had lots of tea and biscuits lol .

I also did some juicing early in WD , It is very time consuming and not an easy cleanup! Thats okay at least your getting some protein in your diet , i think we all need lots of it now . And anything we buy is better than what our doctors would offer us. Ill never forget when I was so sick to start WD , i couldnt consume any food , but my doctor advised I drink 3-4 Ensure Shakes. I dont want to bash other people who use it , but the first 6 ingredients are either fake sugar or real sugar. The quality of it is no better than a mcdonalds milk shake . BUt hey the pharma companies make them!

I didnt have any consistant dizzyness until about 2 yrs into WD. So imagine that , only 1 month of dizzyness in 2 yrs . I think it first came month 14 and then left month 15 . So I dint get it until month 24 again!! and for about 6 months it was like getting hit with a truck Yes it completely knocked me over! no joke . It hit harder at month 24 than it did at month 14. .Ive had very bad dizzynes for 1 yr now since. But It has let up alot . It was between 8-10 out of 10 everyday now its normally bewtween a 5-6/10 . So its going in right direction , But I havent been able to work since the first year of WD . ITs been very tough on me . Money wise etc.. I lost my place I was living in . If I had no support Id be dead. I couldnt work no matter how hard I pushed . My symptoms are way too severe. I am hoping yours lets up . Most people on this website are able to work or do some kind of exercise. Thats what gets me down so much TBH. Mentally im healing much faster than physically. IT could have to do with how my WD started . I can push myself to the limits and I did for the first 6-7 months. Then I broke.

The one weird thing about the dizzyness is I dont think I really healed at all until it hit fullforce. IT was after it let up a bit that I noticed my worst symptoms had improved about 50-80% and Im talking about relentless Agitation and akathisia.

So I know thats not a positive note but honestly their are people on here who took way more drugs than me for much longer time and are able to do much more physically. SO you may be that one who can work through this aswell. But your gonna have to listen to your brain and body .

Ya my ezymes have the HCL and pepsin ! I forgot to respond to one of your old posts but I think u asked if I elimanated dairy and wheat ! answer is no! I cut them back alot though , I do find I get the most acid from wheat and carbs in general , even really healthy ones. I could eat a big steak with veggies , which i do alot and I get no acid , my acid is perfect but If I eat a bowl of brown rice or an egg sandwhich in morning than I could have big problems . Most of my meals is protein and veggies . boring as hell but I only usually have problems with breakfast. I wish shakes agreed with me more. Maybe as I heal more my gut will just settle down.

But all in all JS , the outside part is the toughest, its been so hard for me. I held on as long as I could , I had a good fulltime JOB. I was treated unbelievably well. BUt losing that and how friends and family PLus the doctors treat you, its the toughest part . IT has been for me at least. That and the anger has been even tougher than the WD symptoms themselves. Even if someone believes you that the drugs caused this , they wont believe that no doctors can help or wont believe you. There are so many layers to this . I do have two people close to me who fully understand whats going on , actually 3 if you count my psychologist. Hes well informed about this Pharma Hoax . but nobody believes me , the more I talk , the more crazy I come off. So basically I dont interact with too many people anymore . Thats the toughest part for me. and what alot of people find.

I hope you get some peace today .

September 8, 2017

16 hours ago, JS11 said:

Has anyone noticed an increase in W/D symptoms, specifically anxiety, after taking medicine in liquid form? When I switched to all liquid form of Escitalopram originally, I noticed a surge of anxiety immediately after taking it. Eventually switched back to tablet form. Lots of other medicine changes before finding S.A. Was trying to stabilize my dose after going up and down so frequently, but found that the anxiety was overpowering every time I took the liquid form. I just changed to mostly tablet 7.25mg and 0.6mg of the liquid. When I have stabilized, I will then be able to eliminate the liquid first. Any thoughts from anyone on their reactions to liquid and if anyone did a combination of doses?

thank you,

JS

I dont know anything about the liquids sorry ! you may have to do some digging on this site to see if others have taken the liquid and how they respond. What does that sucker taste like? IT may be adding to the surge but I think its just the whole process and LEX thats causing most of the surge. But thats just my opinion.

September 8, 2017

HI Mort81,

Yes, ChessieCat told me to just hit reply at the bottom of the page rather than quote. I don't know if that responds to a specific post of just goes out in the universe.

So very much going on at the moment, life wise, and as you know, it doesn't help with all the other things. I have been caring for my dad for a very long time and didn't work for a while. Now, doing so on a temporary basis. But that situation is changing. He needs to go to a care facility. I am just unable to do it anymore. It has made my life very isolated. That part is so very hard for me as well. I am moving and it is overwhelming. I don't have a chunk of change stored away for rent and most of the friends I am in contact with live in other places. The terror of not being able to support myself is so very profound. One brother says we can stay there, temporarily, but it isn't the best. An hour from town, isolated and well, just yah. Just so much fear. Very heavy right now, I apologize. I am so glad you are in a supportive situation and have people in your corner who understand. Makes all the difference in the world doesn't it. I don't know I just feel....guilty? like I brought this on myself. I know that isn't productive or correct, when all I wanted to do was be free of these medicines but I finally stopped resisting. What a price to pay. What a price we have paid.

I met with the nurse counselor at my doctor's office today and gave her some of the information about withdrawal as she is studying to be able to become a prescriber herself. But I think people look at my situation and assume a lot of the symptoms are from that. True some may be but not to the extent and severity that I am experiencing. I don't buy it. I have never felt like this before.

I did have a let up on the dizziness. Thank goodness. So far so good. Kept waking up last night but that may be more because I am unable to open the windows to cool things down as we are surrounded by smoke from all the fires. So very many of them. The weather has gone crazy. I have on a fan but it doesn't quite cut it. And, the noise. Oh my gosh, I feel like in the movie Superman when he discovers his super hearing.

6 hours ago, Mort81 said:

I dont know anything about the liquids sorry ! you may have to do some digging on this site to see if others have taken the liquid and how they respond. What does that sucker taste like? IT may be adding to the surge but I think its just the whole process and LEX thats causing most of the surge. But thats just my opinion.

Here I am quoting again, but whatever. I value your opinion greatly, Mort81. It helps settle my mind to hear your experiences. Oh now what have I done? AHHHHHHH..Going to hit reply and try again.

take care,

JS

September 8, 2017

On 07/09/2017 at 10:05 PM, JS11 said:

Hello again Flowers, I hope your day is treating you well.

I am still trying to figure out the etiquette of how to post things on threads and such. I have only corresponded with a couple of people and am trying to reach out to get to know others, so many of whom have gone through so much.

I started reading your thread and felt such comfort and an easing of that lonely feeling which has seemed to take residence of late. So many things you have written about describe my feelings and the things happening within me. My body seems so very foreign. I am able to walk unassisted but am experiencing a rather constant state of dizziness which makes standing for long periods of time difficult if not impossible without clutching onto something for stability. The anxiety, the tears, and yes the inability to be around loud noise, all are present, although not always consistently. Each day is an unknown as I suppose it is in all things, but especially when you don't know how you or your body will react.

I just wanted to say thank you for all that you shared. It has helped tremendously. Having a difficult time today. So much fear of the future and my ability to function. Trying to look at the bright spots, kind souls who are on this journey reaching out, is definitely a big one.

take care,

JS

Hi JS

Sorry, didn't get online yesterday. So my reply is a little late. I am having some good days just now so if I get the chance to go out somewhere I do! Managed a meal out with friends in a very busy ,noisy restaurant and enjoyed every minute. This is so weird as a couple of weeks ago I just couldn't have done it. These windows when they come are so welcome as I really convinced myself I would be housebound forever. You say you fear the future and your ability to function. That is natural when we don't understand what is happening to us and can't fix it quickly.

I am glad my 'story' has helped you in some way. It shows the mistakes I have made along the way. I also keep a private diary and it is amazing to look back at it and see how much I have improved. If I am in a wave just reading about what I did in a window keeps me going.

I am so sorry you are having similar symptoms to me. The dizziness is awful isn't it? Things will get better - it will just take time and accepting that each day will be different. I have got used to the symptoms now but to begin with they really frightened me which made everything worse.

You asked about liquid tapering. I tapered down Cit with liquid and didn't notice any difference in symptoms to be honest. But everyone is different so it could be affecting you.

It is bedtime here so going to turn in but hope we can speak again soon.

Take care JS

Love from Flowers xxx

JS11: So close to being free of Escitalopram/Adderall. Now side-effect RX nightmare

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