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DMV64

DMV64: reinstate Saphris?

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DMV64
On 6/1/2019 at 12:12 PM, Shep said:

benzo

@Shep @JanCarol @manymoretodays   I am just wondering. I understand The analogy about pulling out the Benzo.  But it really is causing you to be in this constant state of anxiety. Isn’t Geoden quite sedating and would help cover the taper of the bento?

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Shep
31 minutes ago, DMV64 said:

@Shep @JanCarol @manymoretodays   I am just wondering. I understand The analogy about pulling out the Benzo.  But it really is causing you to be in this constant state of anxiety. Isn’t Geoden quite sedating and would help cover the taper of the bento?

 

Once you are finished tapering the Saphris and have stabilized, let's revisit this. It's possible that Geoden can help with sleep while you taper the benzo, but please note that the constant state of anxiety may be from a destabilized nervous system as opposed to a side effect of the benzo. 

 

With a long history of polydrug use, it's really hard to sort it out. 

 

Once you are off the Saphris and stablized, you could do a few days of a drug and symptoms journal and we can go through it. It will also be good to get JanCarol and MMT's take on it, as well, as they are more familiar with your taper. 

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DMV64
1 hour ago, Shep said:

Once you are finished tapering the Saphris and have stabilized, let's revisit this.

Yes, I would like to. I just feel this way about the benzo because the time I accidentally took an extra dose the anxiety went away.

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manymoretodays
3 hours ago, DMV64 said:

I am just wondering. I understand The analogy about pulling out the Benzo.  But it really is causing you to be in this constant state of anxiety. Isn’t Geoden quite sedating and would help cover the taper of the bento?

 

Hi DMV,

My own experience with Geodon was that it was sedating, to some degree, but ugh, DMV, it's a antipsychotic/neuroleptic/whatever you want to call it........horrible drug.

If it were me, I'd want off it, sooner, rather than later.  Sure, it's somewhat sedating......I found it to be more hypnotic or tranquilizing.  For at least part of the day.  And then it had all kinds of other effects on me as well.  Go take a good look at the side effects of it.  And then there ARE those pesky drug interactions as well, when one is on many.

 

I don't think it's a good choice for covering Benzo WD.  No.

 

Love, peace, healing, and growth,

mmt

 

 

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Rabe

Hi DMV...Im sorry about your former sponsor.  My own experience has been that there are lots of wonderful people in AA who are working the program and getting well in all ways.  There are others who are on the dry drunk....they come to meetings, they're not drinking, but they are pointing 'fingers' at others rather than doing what it takes to look at themselves and REALLY get better.  As I often heard...when pointing a finger at others there are 3 pointing back at you.  

 

I agree with Rosetta...I have no clue what her issues are and its irrelevant to me...I just can hear that she is not well....she's there but not well.  Thats all you need to know...shes not well and she's not healthy or good for you.  You dont need to doubt yourself or question you're status because of her....Im sure there are plenty of others who are supportive and kind.  Stick close to those and stay away for her though she may not want it that way and may try to get that dynamic flowing again.  You can politely excuse yourself or just be more blunt and tell her how it has felt to hear the things she has said to you.  I personally would just stay away as it has been my experience that people like that wont hear what you actually say to them anyway and may turn it on you somehow...so to me it wouldn't be worth it as she has shown her true character.

Take care!  Thinking about you!💜

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DMV64

Thanks Rabe. I am staying away from her. I have been around the rooms of AA long enough to recognize the signs. It was just hurtful and really disappointing. When I think back on asking her to be my temporary sponsor I realize there were signs but I was so desperate to get someone that I chose to ignore them. Anyway thanks for all your kind words and support. I do love my new sponsor, she’s great!!

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DMV64

I am really wrestling with memory. I keep forgetting things. This has been going on awhile. Hoping it will get better. 

Looked at my signature I realize it’s not right. One of the times I was suicidal ( can’t remember which one) they upped my benzo because I did not want to go to the hospital. To 1.5. It helped for a short while and then stopped. What a waste. I should have known better. All I can attribute it to is the state I was in. 

I looked back and see I didn’t write anything about it. I wrote my journal entries without even fixing it.  I feel like a failure at keeping my sh*t straight. The cog fog is so bad with the confusion and memory. I just want to get off all these drugs. I feel stupid now. I am sorry. Maybe I need to get my husband to review my work. God I am trying so hard. I am sorry again to all my helpers for mistakes here.  : (   I fixed my signature. 

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DMV64

I am trying really hard to let go of the resentment against my old sponsor. Like we do in program I have been praying for her every night or at least every night that I remember to help the resentment go away. But it  keeps lingering around. I do not wish to have it. I just want to accept that she is who she is. I don’t know I guess this whole thing really hit a sore spot in me.

On another note, I have had a really good day yesterday. It gives me a lot of hope.

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DMV64

Any day that I have that I don’t have anxiety the entire day is a good day. I have been trying to write them down so that I don’t forget them. My husband and my therapist suggested that I do this so I can look back and see that it’s not always terrible anxiety all day

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DMV64
On 6/12/2019 at 10:20 AM, manymoretodays said:

I don't think it's a good choice for covering Benzo WD.  No

@manymoretodaysI was really hoping it would be because I want off them so much. I also think my morning anxiery is causes by a combination of Geoden and benzos. What do you think?

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DMV64
On 6/12/2019 at 6:52 AM, Shep said:

With a long history of polydrug use, it's really hard to sort it out.

@Shep It is really hard to sort out. I can't wait to get off Saphris. I would like to do a journal after I am stable and have you and the others look at it and tell me what is next.

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DMV64
On 5/30/2019 at 9:40 AM, JanCarol said:

'm not really keen on the idea of cutting the tablet

@JanCarol I stopped doing this and am just using teh whole tablet.

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DMV64
On 6/1/2019 at 12:12 PM, Shep said:

What is happening in your brain?

I know I read this before but now reading it on a good day, well it is an amazing resource!

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Rosetta

I'm so glad you had good day. -R

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DMV64

Thank Rosetta.  I almost feel like maybe I could clean out my file cabinet. I guess I’ll just have to see how today goes.

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DMV64

I have had to let a lot go. Like doing my finances each month. Keeping good records. You know. 

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DMV64

@JanCarol Hi...I am wondering what you think about the Geoden vs. Benzo for next taper? I know Shep said to wait to hear from you and MMT. MMT thinks it is definitely not a good idea to do benzos first. I am thinking you will agree. I am not there yet but just wondering as I am in a window now and can think and process better.

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Carmie

Hi DMV, 

 

Thanks for popping around to say hi. Yes, I do love to look at the positives despite all we are going through. I think gratitude lists are great as they still help us to see the good despite withdrawals. 

 

One day, although still far away, I will write: “ No more withdrawals. Yay!🎉😁

 

Sending hugs🤗

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DMV64
12 minutes ago, Carmie said:

One day, although still far away, I will write: “ No more withdrawals. Yay!🎉😁

Carmie I await this day. We will celebrate!

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Carmie
2 minutes ago, DMV64 said:

Carmie I await this day. We will celebrate!

 

We sure will DMV🎉🎉🎉💚

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Rabe

Hi DMV....hoping your weekend is going ok?  Just thinking about you and wanted you to know.  How is Zelda?  How are you doing with your meds and all? Hows worK and life?  Hope things are going ok!!  Hugs to you DMV!💜

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