Moonpie: need help and supporting tapering off of Ativan

[Moonpie]

@ Shep I was wondering if anyone has had experiences with elevated blood sugar and Lexapro tapering.  I eat clean, rarely sweets. I had my thyroid labs drawn and my fasting blood sugar was 116.  I have never had that unless I had just eaten before blood draw.  The night before my grandson brought me some orange chicken.  Yes super sweet. I thought i ate it 10 to 12 hours before blood work.  I have been having some withdrawl symptoms.  Holding my taper a 2nd time now.  Not able to sleep much at night, tossing and turning, plus very tried.  I am not over weight, don't have any of the health or lifestyle things that tend toward diabetes.  Just concerned.  Also can it cause elevated Cholesterol.   Mine has been for the past few years since I have been on these meds and was not before.  Moonpie

[Frogie]

13 minutes ago, Moonpie said:

@ Shep I was wondering if anyone has had experiences with elevated blood sugar and Lexapro tapering.  I eat clean, rarely sweets. I had my thyroid labs drawn and my fasting blood sugar was 116.  I have never had that unless I had just eaten before blood draw.  The night before my grandson brought me some orange chicken.  Yes super sweet. I thought i ate it 10 to 12 hours before blood work.  I have been having some withdrawl symptoms.  Holding my taper a 2nd time now.  Not able to sleep much at night, tossing and turning, plus very tried.  I am not over weight, don't have any of the health or lifestyle things that tend toward diabetes.  Just concerned.  Also can it cause elevated Cholesterol.   Mine has been for the past few years since I have been on these meds and was not before.  Moonpie

Hi Moonpie:

 

Shep is on a leave of absence for a while. So, the members are helping each other here.

 

 I know when I was tapering Lexapro, I never had a high sugar on my blood draw. But I did a few times have high cholesterol come back. Stupid dr put me in a statin but that didn’t last long because I had a reaction to it. I don’t recall reading about anyone on here having the high sugar level, but I could be wrong.
 

I would tend to think, if it was me, that maybe the orange chicken had something to do with it. I don’t think that’s too high. I don’t know what “normal” is without looking at my last bloodwork. 
 

Maybe wait a month or so and ask the dr if you can have your sugar drawn again. Then just drink lots of water and be sure to watch the time to stop eating. 
 

If the dr was concerned, they would be calling you I would think.

 

Oh, and I have lots of sleepless nights. Probably 5 out of 7 a week. I just know it’s wd and eventually I’ll sleep again. Can’t wait for that day. In the meantime I have a mask I wear and earplugs. It helps a little.

 

 I hope I helped just a little.

 

Hang in there. It will get better.

 

Take care,

 Frogie xx

[Moonpie]

Thank you Frogie!  It helped a lot!!  Sorry you are having problems sleeping, that seems to make everything harder.  Hope your sleeping problems will resolve quickly.  Lack of sleep seems to make everything harder.  

[Frogie]

21 minutes ago, Moonpie said:

Thank you Frogie!  It helped a lot!!  Sorry you are having problems sleeping, that seems to make everything harder.  Hope your sleeping problems will resolve quickly.  Lack of sleep seems to make everything harder.  

I’m glad I could help😊

[Moonpie]

Experiencing very severe depression. I am on my phone so I will update my signature later. I am still tapering off Lexapro and at .026 in weight. I am holding this taper for an extra four days due to the depression. I am not going to harm myself nor do I desire to. I am just so depleted emotionally I feel like I am just existing. I have no motivation and the fatigue horrendous. I don't think I am sleeping soundly. As I wake up exhausted. I cannot encourage everyone enough to keep the daily Journal of symptoms with each dose. Starting back probably two or three months ago I began seeing a pattern of at the same point every month my symptoms were worse. This journal has helped me so much to be able to look back and see what I experienced an earlier date. I just feel like a failure and not being able to accomplish what I need physically. I am so down I can't even put it into words. I wonder if I will ever feel normal again, whatever that is. Is this normal in tapering with Lexapro. With the Ativan taper the lower I got the better I felt. Sometimes I wonder if there's not something else wrong with me.

[Frogie]

On 7/29/2020 at 4:46 AM, Moonpie said:

Experiencing very severe depression. I am on my phone so I will update my signature later. I am still tapering off Lexapro and at .026 in weight. I am holding this taper for an extra four days due to the depression. I am not going to harm myself nor do I desire to. I am just so depleted emotionally I feel like I am just existing. I have no motivation and the fatigue horrendous. I don't think I am sleeping soundly. As I wake up exhausted. I cannot encourage everyone enough to keep the daily Journal of symptoms with each dose. Starting back probably two or three months ago I began seeing a pattern of at the same point every month my symptoms were worse. This journal has helped me so much to be able to look back and see what I experienced an earlier date. I just feel like a failure and not being able to accomplish what I need physically. I am so down I can't even put it into words. I wonder if I will ever feel normal again, whatever that is. Is this normal in tapering with Lexapro. With the Ativan taper the lower I got the better I felt. Sometimes I wonder if there's not something else wrong with me.

I had those same symptoms when I was tapering Lexapro too. But I think I went through a wave when I was in this situation. That’s great you are keeping a journal. Very smart thing to do. I do know the lower I went the more emotional I got because Lexapro numbs your emotions. But I eventually came out of it. You are doing well and holding your taper. If it continues maybe hold a little longer and see how you’re feeling. Hope everything works out for you!😊

[Moonpie]

 I can't believe it is almost 3 years since I joined the group.  I am only  2 -3 months (depending on taper holds) from being Lexapro free!   If I didn't have you all I would be sure I was dying of something or going crazy.  It is amazing how many symptoms come from the drugs and tapering.  Today I have hit a wave.  Total exhaustion, weak, just want to cry.  When I lay on my right side and sometimes when I am just laying down to sleep I feel weird like I am going to pass out or something bad is going to happen.  I felt discouraged today feeling so bad.  Then I thought "Hey you are just a couple of months away from being off another drug!!!" That helped  me get in the HANG IN THERE attitude even though I feel so bad.  I know there are times we have all felt, "Is it always going to be this way?"  But all victories shared in this group say NO!  I am so glad I have done the super slow taper.  It was longer but worth it. I finally realized there is no prize for getting done quicker, in fact it can cause suffering. 

 

I know I am jumping ahead , but how long should I wait to stop my last taper, Buspar?  I waited a 2 months after the ativan.  But Lexapro has been another animal all together.  

Also, will I be able to crush my Buspar like I have the Ativan and Lexapro.  That has worked so well for me.  Hang in there everyone!  WE WiLL MAKE IT!

 

 

Edited August 22, 2020 by ChessieCat
deitalicised and added spacing

[ChessieCat]

24 minutes ago, Moonpie said:

will I be able to crush my Buspar

 

tips-for-tapering-off-busipirone-buspar

 

 

27 minutes ago, Moonpie said:

how long should I wait to stop my last taper, Buspar?  ...  But Lexapro has been another animal all together.  

 

I think waiting at least 3 months would be a good idea.  Possibly longer, especially considering the unusual circumstances we have been experiencing this year.

 

And if you aren't experiencing any side effects from the Buspar, you might consider holding for 6 months and just enjoy life without tapering and withdrawal symptoms for a while.

[Moonpie]

Thank  you Chessie Cat! I will certainly consider that. I would love to and do not plan to move ahead until I feel better.  I do not know if the Buspar is part of the problem or not.  But being on this is keeping me from having dental work done.  I will definitely need it before I get off the Buspar and it is going to be $$$$$ because it has to be sedation, which I would fore go if I could until all tapers are done. It isn't looking possible though.  Can I crush the Buspar as I have the  Ativan and Lexapro.  Appreciate your help!  Moonpie

[ChessieCat]

17 minutes ago, Moonpie said:

Can I crush the Buspar

 

I provided the link to the topic before:

 

54 minutes ago, ChessieCat said:

tips-for-tapering-off-busipirone-buspar

 

[ChessieCat]

19 minutes ago, Moonpie said:

I do not know if the Buspar is part of the problem or not.  But being on this is keeping me from having dental work done.  I will definitely need it before I get off the Buspar and it is going to be $$$$$ because it has to be sedation, which I would fore go if I could until all tapers are done. It isn't looking possible though.

 

Other members have had surgery whilst tapering/on drugs.

[Moonpie]

I had a severe reaction to the carbocaine they use for my dental deadening.  I am allergic to epinephrine so they use that. I had difficulty breathing and was on oxygen 45 minutes before I was okay. The dentist said other drugs similar to that would probably have a similar affect and he said not to risk it.  Next time I might not make it.  I have a tooth that HAS to be pulled or fixed and with sedation dentistry I am looking at $1000 to $2800 dollars.  Which is a big amount for me.  Thank you for the link!   Moonpie

[ChessieCat]

Okay, I didn't realise that you had a previous bad experience.  I thought you were just concerned about it.

[Moonpie]

I should have posted that to begin with.  My bad.  Just don't want to jump into the new taper too quickly.  I am going to have to finance one tooth probably but I don't know if there is other dental work to be done. I want to make this as smooth as possible, if that is possible!  Thank you for your support! 

[Moonpie]

Need Help AGAIN!  This last part of my Lexapro taper is proving to be like a tiger in the jungle, I never know what it will do.  I beginning to think the pain in my neck is due to the taper.  Not sure.  My sleep has taken a weird turn.  I feel like I am partially awake and never go completely asleep. Just kind of hanging in between.  I know I am not getting any deep sleep.  I toss and turn and finally fall asleep.  I will wake up through the night feeling like I am going to stop breathing. I am afraid to take my magnesium because the relaxing affect it does have might make me stop breathing completely.  No matter what time I fall asleep I "PING!" wake up at 7:30 am.  I cannot sleep late, and when i nap it is much the same.  Is this anxiety causing the stop breathing feeling?  My taper has not been tip toeing through the tulips but I have felt it has been more on the positive side.  Now toward the end there doesn't seem much of a breather.  I made the mistake of reading all the people that continue having symptoms after years if being off.  UGH.  Any help is appreciated.

[Frogie]

1 hour ago, Moonpie said:

Need Help AGAIN!  This last part of my Lexapro taper is proving to be like a tiger in the jungle, I never know what it will do.  I beginning to think the pain in my neck is due to the taper.  Not sure.  My sleep has taken a weird turn.  I feel like I am partially awake and never go completely asleep. Just kind of hanging in between.  I know I am not getting any deep sleep.  I toss and turn and finally fall asleep.  I will wake up through the night feeling like I am going to stop breathing. I am afraid to take my magnesium because the relaxing affect it does have might make me stop breathing completely.  No matter what time I fall asleep I "PING!" wake up at 7:30 am.  I cannot sleep late, and when i nap it is much the same.  Is this anxiety causing the stop breathing feeling?  My taper has not been tip toeing through the tulips but I have felt it has been more on the positive side.  Now toward the end there doesn't seem much of a breather.  I made the mistake of reading all the people that continue having symptoms after years if being off.  UGH.  Any help is appreciated.

With my Lexapro taper I had shortness of breath a lot. I also had a lot of anxiety. I still don’t sleep. I’m awake 3-4 hours after I go to bed. Lexapro is hard to get off of. But you’re doing wonderful. Just think how far you’ve come! 

[Moonpie]

Thank you for always supporting and encouraging Frogie!   Did you ever wake up frightened and feeling like you were going to stop breathing?

[Frogie]

19 minutes ago, Moonpie said:

Thank you for always supporting and encouraging Frogie!   Did you ever wake up frightened and feeling like you were going to stop breathing?

Oh yeah. I still do. You’re going to be ok. Hang in there 😊 

[Moonpie]

 

Triggering content:

 

I was leaving cleaning a business Monday and witnessed something horrific.  A man was hit my a car, he was on foot.  Flipped twice, will spare you the details of what his body did in the air.  Landed in the middle of the road on his back.  To say I was hysterical is an understatement.  Called 911 and sat on the curb at the business and shook and cried for 45 min. Made it to the police dept to write out a statement.  Couldn't quit crying. Made it home.  Still having flashbacks.  Then yesterday I was helping someone and lifted something heavy over my head.  Afterwards felt chest pressure, just weird.  Went home and laid down till I had to go back to work again. Sure I pulled some muscles.  The weird feeling has happened a couple of more times and the chest pressure.  Could it be the tapering and stress?   Not in a good place right now. 

 

Edited September 12, 2020 by ChessieCat
added note

[ChessieCat]

Sorry that what happened has caused you added stress.  Withdrawal-wise it would be best to stay on your current dose for at least 2 months.  The added stress is highly likely to cause an increase in withdrawal symptoms

 

I also strongly suggest that you see a counsellor who can help you to work through your experience.  This counselling would be totally unrelated to withdrawal.  You wouldn't even have to tell them that you are tapering.

 

One thing that you will possibly notice is that you will be hyper-alert for a while.  I nearly hit a ~12 year old boy on a scooter who decided at the last second to cross the crossing as the lights changed.  If I had been eager to take off from the lights I would have hit him.  Thankfully I understood the reactions that I was going through and just allowed them to happen.  However, what did surprise me was how long it took for the hyper-alertness to subside.  It eased after a few months but I was still a bit hyper-alert 6 months later.

[ChessieCat]

((((((Moonpie))))))

[Moonpie]

Yes I am very hyper alert. At first I was a little afraid to drive but I am over that now. I feel like I am handling it very well but I didn't know if some of these symptoms might be a offset of that even though I am not knowingly experiencing anxiety about  what happened. The man is alive stable.  They did surgery on his hip and set his legs, and plan to do surgery on his legs. Amazingly no brain or spinal injury. When the flashbacks come I stop my mind and do not allow it go through this scenario. Thank you for the hugs, I really needed it. I feel so alone tonight. It seems like the closer I get to the end of this Lexapro taper the more symptoms I am having. Nothing like the Ativan taper. It got easier.. I am hoping that this will just be a bump in the road and the rest will go smoother. I keep being upset with myself would being so weak. Appreciate you answering.

[ChessieCat]

It's good that you know the outcome was good.  You were probably still in shock when you drove.  You might find that you brake more heavily/suddenly/often if you see movement when you are driving.  Even now, 18 months after my incident, I find that I brake suddenly if there is cyclist or pedestrian or kids close to my car.

[Moonpie]

I wanted to share 2 things that might help others.  As you know I have been having a rough time with withdrawals even as slow as I am going.  Well the other night I was weighing to make my capsules and my scale light flashed said the batteries were low and shut down.  I replaced the batteries and noticed the screen was brighter and it was weighing faster.  Looking back I think that might have been my problem.  With the batteries low the scale wasn't weighing properly. I went back and weighed the powder in the capsules I had already done and they were off enough to matter.  So far I have had no more problems.  So that might be something to think about if the batteries haven't been changed in a while. 

Also I was at my daughters and gave into temptation and ate a small processed ding dong like cake. I have not felt well the rest of the day. That is how sugar affects me especially since I started tapering. I can't risk even a small cheat because diet plays a big part in how I feel. 

[Moonpie]

Question,  (forgive me if I have already asked it as the taper is messing with my memory some.)  Why is the end of the Lexapro taper harder.  I have muscle aches and fatigue soooooo bad the last month.  I have gone slow so I can't figure out why.  Ativan got easier.  Since seeing the man get hit by the car, I have been stuck on the side of the road with a flat tire, flat spare and dead battery (thanking the Lord for the nice young man that stopped!) accidently shattered my back side van window getting too close to a dumpster, had a lady back into the back of my van (waiting on repair shop to get me in) and my daughter had emergency surgery in another state for a blood clot in the stent in her leg. These happened each week within a month.  Other than some moments of moderate anxiety at times that resolved I did okay.  So I feel my taper is doing good in that area.  Moonpie

[ChessieCat]

Wow, so sorry to hear that you have experienced all that added stress.  Considering everything that has happened it sounds like you are doing as well as can be expected.  You still need to take care of yourself; you've been through a lot is a very short period of time.

 

And added stress can definitely cause withdrawal symptoms to worsen.

 

Q:  What drugs are you currently taking?  What doses (mgai not powder weight) and what times?

 

I'm not sure if the amounts listed in your drug signature are mgai or mgpw.  Whichever it is, so long as the figures are in the same measurement the percentages remain the same.

 

Here's your tapering percentage decreases in 2020:

 

22 Apr:  .050 to .047 = 6%

15 Jun:  .047 to .037 = 21.25%

21 Aug:  .037 to .020 = 46%

10 Oct:  .020 to .012 = 40%

 

This calculator is very handy:  https://www.calculatorsoup.com/calculators/algebra/percentage-decrease-calculator.php

 

It could be that you are not get consistent doses due to weighing.

 

Q:  Are you able to get liquid Lexapro (which can be diluted if needed) which would allow you to get the doses you need to reduce by smaller percent decreases?

 

And don't forget that Lexapro is a very strong drug compared to other ADs.

[ChessieCat]

Q:  Did you only start Buspar in April?

 

04-6-2020 Lexapro at .050 in weight. Buspar .5 divided into 2 doses am and pm

[Moonpie]

No when i started the lexapro 

[Moonpie]

I take 2.5 a.m. and p.m. and i am tapering Lexapro by weight.  Started .152 mcg and am now at .010.  Started buspar and lexapro 2016.  Have already tapered off 1.5 mg ativan a year ago.

[Moonpie]

Moving on down cautiuosly!  I am tapering .oo1 by weight every 5 days instead of 4. This seems to keep withdrawal at bay.  If it changes I will add another day.  Starting .oo8 tonight!  The end is in sight! Only symptom is intense muscle aches all over and not sleeping soundly.  After a few months break from tapering I will start the Buspar taper!  Couldn't have made it this far with out this group!  You were literally an answer to prayer!

[Moonpie]

@Shep  @Altostrata  Can you get serotonin syndrome at the end of a taper?    I feel like Tigger at this point.  I have been having severe muscle aches and pains in my neck and shoulders. It has been on going on several weeks but is getting worse.  I am exhausted all the time, and it is getting worse. I sleep and wake up still exhausted.  I am moving my taper to every 7 days now.  I had a panic attack last night after I went to bed.  I am playing is it the thyroid, taper or something else game.  My thyroid levels were in range but on the low side for me.  And if it gets any lower I have hyperthyroid symptoms.  My doctor said I could try reducing it if I wanted to.  Just don't know what to do.  Wearing down.  I know I sometimes sound like a broken record in all of this. Thank you for your patience and listening.

[Shep]

10 hours ago, Moonpie said:

@Shep  @Altostrata  Can you get serotonin syndrome at the end of a taper?    I feel like Tigger at this point.  I have been having severe muscle aches and pains in my neck and shoulders. It has been on going on several weeks but is getting worse.  I am exhausted all the time, and it is getting worse. I sleep and wake up still exhausted.  I am moving my taper to every 7 days now.  I had a panic attack last night after I went to bed.  I am playing is it the thyroid, taper or something else game.  My thyroid levels were in range but on the low side for me.  And if it gets any lower I have hyperthyroid symptoms.  My doctor said I could try reducing it if I wanted to.  Just don't know what to do.  Wearing down.  I know I sometimes sound like a broken record in all of this. Thank you for your patience and listening.

 

These symptoms - muscle aches and exhaustion - don't sound like serotonin syndrome, especially not at .007 mg Lexapro (the dose in your signature). 

 

Perhaps take a break from the taper and hold for a bit and see if that helps. 

[Moonpie]

Thank you.   Are these symptoms that would go withdrawal and tapering?

[ChessieCat]

13 hours ago, Moonpie said:

I am playing is it the thyroid, taper or something else game.  My thyroid levels were in range but on the low side for me.  And if it gets any lower I have hyperthyroid symptoms.  My doctor said I could try reducing it if I wanted to.

 

https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/9153#symptoms

 

Muscle weakness and fatigue are both listed.

[Moonpie]

Thank you Chessie Cat.  I am soooooo close to the end! I feel like the man crawling through the sand to the oasis almost in reach.

 

 

[Shep]

9 hours ago, Moonpie said:

Thank you Chessie Cat.  I am soooooo close to the end! I feel like the man crawling through the sand to the oasis almost in reach.

 

 

 

Try this and see if you feel better. It's great for fatigue and just feeling out of sorts. It's very restorative. 

 

Legs Up the Wall Pose