Nikki74: Lexapro mirtazapine diazepam akathisia

[Nikki74]

1 hour ago, bubble said:

 

This is all very natural during the stabilization stage.

 

I just couldn't find any video that tries to describe patterns of recovery without some subtitles in what I believe is Polish.

 

If you can disregard it, I think it will help a lot.

 

It's great that you are doing these self-soothing exercises. This will pass soon and you will feel so much stronger by helping yourself getting out of this.

 

 

Thank you Bubble. Very helpful video. I might send it to my GP as he phoned today and was baffled by my reverse in progress! 

 

Talk about feeling like you're going bonkers. This stuff is so extreme. 

 

Thank you for the reassurance and info. 

 

During days like today the self soothing has been mostly repeating ‘it’s a wave, it’s a wave, it’ll pass, dear God help me’, interspersed with hand on heart and saying kind things to myself, messaging a friend who gets it, and lying under as many covers as I could just holding on for dear life whilst Celtic music played on my phone making me cycle between heart break, despair, brief appreciation of its beauty, and irritation. 

 

The Rubiks Cube has been well and truly twiddled. 

[bubble]

3 minutes ago, Nikki74 said:

During days like today the self soothing has been mostly repeating ‘it’s a wave, it’s a wave, it’ll pass, dear God help me’, interspersed with hand on heart and saying kind things to myself, messaging a friend who gets it, and lying under as many covers as I could just holding on for dear life whilst Celtic music played on my phone making me cycle between heart break, despair, brief appreciation of its beauty, and irritation. 

 

 

This is all good. Sometimes we just have to survive things, like a painful cramp. It will exhaust itself and I hope nd believe things will start calming down soon.

 

Hang in there. I'm glad the video was helpful.

[Nikki74]

19 hours ago, bheb said:

 

I ask myself this all the time. I thought I was having adverse reactions to Prozac, then ct'ed it but no improvement (it's also possible adverse reactions take a while to heal). I suppose it's possible that there's wd/delayed wd that makes things worse. It's awfully hard to tell.

 

I guess the important question is whether it makes any sense to reinstate. I don't have much experience on that matter, but hopefully someone can advise.

 

Either way, I hope this new wave settles down soon for you.

Thank you Bheb.

 

I don’t think I’d reinstate pregabalin this far out. I don’t have any anyway. Though I’ve often craved it which shows it’s addictive. I don’t think going up in dose of escitalopram would be wise either. But I’m not an expert.

 

This whole experience messes with your perception of things and you don’t know what’s doing what. I start to think oh no, this drug is giving me adverse reactions, when it’s probably the wave.

[Nikki74]

17 hours ago, bubble said:

 

This is all good. Sometimes we just have to survive things, like a painful cramp. It will exhaust itself and I hope nd believe things will start calming down soon.

 

Hang in there. I'm glad the video was helpful.

Thanks Bubble.

 

Only slept 3 and a half hours last night. But I did get an extra hour or so after my morning meds.

 

Woke with feelings of isolation and hopelessness. 

 

Intense morning anxiety was less so today but it’s creeping up now an hour and a half after my 2nd diazepam dose.

 

Very fatigued and still dizzy.

 

Akathisia coming in peaks.

 

I wish I could smoke less as I’m sure the cravings through the day don’t help and I just don’t like it but I don’t seem to be able to cut back. I’m too scared to go back to vaping as it’s another change and different chemicals in the liquid.

 

Worried about my teeth which need attention, little bit of decay visible on one, receding gums on two teeth and a lower front tooth seems to be showing signs of wear and yellowing on the tip. But the thought of a dental appointment just seems so impossible right now.

 

Exhausted but unable to rest.

 

Will stabilising mean my thought processes will become less ‘stuck’ and a bit more ‘normal’? ie not just about withdrawals, fears, memories etc, less ‘self centred’?

 

I feel so far from myself. 

 

 

 

[bubble]

11 minutes ago, Nikki74 said:

Will stabilising mean my thought processes will become less ‘stuck’ and a bit more ‘normal’? ie not just about withdrawals, fears, memories etc, less ‘self centred’?

 

 

Yes, of course. That's the whole point of it.

 

The less we struggle, fight and resist and more accepting we can be, the easier it will be.

 

12 minutes ago, Nikki74 said:

But the thought of a dental appointment just seems so impossible right now

 

Right now is the key word. Nothing will happen if you wait for a bit longer when you feel stronger to address it

13 minutes ago, Nikki74 said:

slept 3 and a half hours last night

 

I left out that only because it's all relative. Some people don't get any sleep at all.

14 minutes ago, Nikki74 said:

Intense morning anxiety was less

 

it is a matter of seeing the glass as half full (rather than the opposite). I survived months of stabilisation following reinstatement by focusing on these at first very small moments when the painful cramp of all sort of symptoms would ease.

 

2 hours ago, Nikki74 said:

This whole experience messes with your perception of things and you don’t know what’s doing what. I start to think oh no, this drug is giving me adverse reactions, when it’s probably the wave

 

I like how you are beginning to conceptualise this whole process. This is another major step forward towards a functional and ultimately drug free life. It's exactly as you wrote.

 

I hope you get out of this wave soon. It seems it is lessening.

[Nikki74]

4 minutes ago, bubble said:

 

Yes, of course. That's the whole point of it.

 

The less we struggle, fight and resist and more accepting we can be, the easier it will be.

 

 

Right now is the key word. Nothing will happen if you wait for a bit longer when you feel stronger to address it

 

I left out that only because it's all relative. Some people don't get any sleep at all.

 

it is a matter of seeing the glass as half full (rather than the opposite). I survived months of stabilisation following reinstatement by focusing on these at first very small moments when the painful cramp of all sort of symptoms would ease.

 

 

I like how you are beginning to conceptualise this whole process. This is another major step forward towards a functional and ultimately drug free life. It's exactly as you wrote.

 

I hope you get out of this wave soon. It seems it is lessening.

Thanks Bubble.

 

I do get worried that because I ct’d 150mg pregabalin just before cting the lexapro, and never reinstated that, that it’s a big deal for my cns. Plus the Zopiclone ct in September, though that’s partly why I ended up on more diazepam, to ‘aid’ that.

 

I suppose what I’m saying is, I worry the damage is too much.

[bubble]

I know what you mean but we see a lot worse and people recover.

 

Since you are experiencing windows already I wouldn't worry about that at all. It might mean it will take a bit longer and explains why it is so hard but it doesn't mean you want recover. Not at all.

 

Could you just in one line add what drugs and doses you are currently taking? 

[Nikki74]

16 minutes ago, bubble said:

I know what you mean but we see a lot worse and people recover.

 

Since you are experiencing windows already I wouldn't worry about that at all. It might mean it will take a bit longer and explains why it is so hard but it doesn't mean you want recover. Not at all.

 

Could you just in one line add what drugs and doses you are currently taking? 

Ok thank you.

 

5mg lexapro, 15mg Mirtazipine, 6mg diazepam 

[Nikki74]

1 hour ago, bubble said:

I know what you mean but we see a lot worse and people recover.

 

Since you are experiencing windows already I wouldn't worry about that at all. It might mean it will take a bit longer and explains why it is so hard but it doesn't mean you want recover. Not at all.

 

Could you just in one line add what drugs and doses you are currently taking? 

I was looking for success stories from ct’s but couldn’t find much hope.

 

Finding things like 2-4 years and still symptomatic. 

 

I just had a half hour of ‘perkiness’ where I felt some of my old cheekiness and humour emerge. Did a quick drawing, but my coordination is so poor and concentration is almost painful, my head has been zapping a bit since. But I set foot outside the front door and got the bins in from the collection. 

 

If you can direct me to a positive story similar to mine that’d be great. 

 

Because I already have a neurological illness (CFS) I hope my chances are as good as someone without such an illness. 

 

Thank you for your help Bubble. 

 

Edited November 7, 2017 by Nikki74

[Staz]

Hi Nikki,

I've been poly drugged and had meds changed frequently over the last 18 months. No med or combination has helped. C/T off of pregabalin is tough, very tough and you can take many months to improve. I'm nearly 4 months off pregabalin and still suffering. It's a horrendous drug so don't underestimate the impact this has had on your cns and symptoms. Just don't go back on it. Time is the only healer with pregabalin, no a/d or antipsychotic will help. You will end up in even more trouble if you try them.

[Nikki74]

24 minutes ago, Staz said:

Hi Nikki,

I've been poly drugged and had meds changed frequently over the last 18 months. No med or combination has helped. C/T off of pregabalin is tough, very tough and you can take many months to improve. I'm nearly 4 months off pregabalin and still suffering. It's a horrendous drug so don't underestimate the impact this has had on your cns and symptoms. Just don't go back on it. Time is the only healer with pregabalin, no a/d or antipsychotic will help. You will end up in even more trouble if you try them.

Hi Staz

 

Good to meet you. I’m sorry you’re going through it too.

 

Yes I ct’d from 150mg early June, so I’m 5 months out. But also ct’d escitalopram though reinstated 10mg then dropped to 5mg. Then ct’d after 7 weeks of Zopiclone, all on advice from dr/ psych!

 

I ended up on 6mg diazepam through all this.

 

I’m now on the escitalopram, 15mg Mirtazipine and the diazepam.

 

My life has been completely changed for the worse. As you’ll know!

 

What are you on now? 

 

Ps no intention of ever taking pregabalin again! 

Edited November 7, 2017 by Nikki74

[Staz]

1 hour ago, Nikki74 said:

Hi Staz

 

Good to meet you. I’m sorry you’re going through it too.

 

Yes I ct’d from 150mg early June, so I’m 5 months out. But also ct’d escitalopram though reinstated 10mg then dropped to 5mg. Then ct’d after 7 weeks of Zopiclone, all on advice from dr/ psych!

 

I ended up on 6mg diazepam through all this.

 

I’m now on the escitalopram, 15mg Mirtazipine and the diazepam.

 

My life has been completely changed for the worse. As you’ll know!

 

What are you on now? 

 

Ps no intention of ever taking pregabalin again! 

See my signature for med details Nikki and good to talk to you too. I was a member of a FB pregabalin group which had about 5000 members and found them very supportive but the overall impact and healing time required could be as much as 12 months for some but the average was 5-9 months. I'm in a worse position than you drug wise. 15mg of diazepam given to me to stop ssri start up anxiety and that was kept going for 6 weeks by which time I was hooked, then pregabalin thrown in and I was diagnosed with GAD and the ssri changed to escitalopram which gave me the same reaction as prozac. I was then c/t'd off of diazepam and lasted a month before reinstating at 12mg. I've not really recovered from this. I've tried numerous a/d's and quetiapine and nothing has worked for me. The only way forward is to get stable so no med changes for me for at least 3-4 months now then gradually unpick the mess psychiatry has made of me. All this cost me a well paid job and career as I was unable to work and had no option but to retire as I was just 55 and could get my works pension losing 2/3rds of it due to my age. The last 18 months have been hell. Both my kids left home in this period and my wife works so I'm a lonely depressed wreck right now. My aim is to stabilise then start the slow process of tapering which is daunting and will take me many years. There are various ways of looking at this and which drug to taper first. If I knew the drug that is perpetuating my depression it would be far simpler but with me I'm almost phobic of psych meds now and my biggest enemy is insomnia which most psych meds cause when withdrawan. My social situation isn't helping and is another issue so I'm volunteering to get me out of the house a few days a week. My life has been ruined by these drugs and I'm going to need to learn to embrace where I am and my current circumstances. The cruelest thing of all in this process is not letting go of the person I was but the letting go of a future that I'd been working toward and just accepting each day as it comes. Sorry about the rant but thanks for your reply. xx

 

[Nikki74]

3 hours ago, bubble said:

I know what you mean but we see a lot worse and people recover.

 

Since you are experiencing windows already I wouldn't worry about that at all. It might mean it will take a bit longer and explains why it is so hard but it doesn't mean you want recover. Not at all.

 

Could you just in one line add what drugs and doses you are currently taking? 

Bubble

 

ive been getting a spasm in my throat for a long time. I noticed it last year when I was given phenargan for nausea, took it for a couple of weeks but would get it when I took a tablet. Before that I’d been on trazodone 50mg for two months and developed over reactive reflexes and muscle twitching (actually the twitching had started before that), my gp put it down to serotonin syndrome and took me off the trazodone. I also get the throat spasm when I take Diazepam now. I was just reading wigglets posts and read up on TD. I’m scared that’s what this is. I curl and flick my toes a lot at night and wring my hands a lot. Put this down to aka or rls. 

I’m scared right now. 

 

Ive had instances where I’ve felt my throat close when going to sleep and it’s woken me up, this has only happened since this whole withdrawal thing started. But I know I do a sort of clicking thing with my throat when I’m asleep, that’s been going on years.

 

Ps just remembered I took one phenargan in August for nausea and got it then too. 

 

Any thoughts on the throat spasms? 

Edited November 7, 2017 by Nikki74
Extra info

[Staz]

30 minutes ago, Nikki74 said:

Bubble

 

ive been getting a spasm in my throat for a long time. I noticed it last year when I was give phenargan for nausea, took it for a couple of weeks but would get it when I took a tablet. I also get it when I take Diazepam now. I was just reading wigglets posts and read up on TD. I’m scared that’s what this is. I curl and flick my toes a lot at night and wring my hands a lot. Put this down to aka or rls. 

 

I’m scared right now. 

TD is a side effect of antipsychotics and you aren't on any that I can see Nikki so don't worry about it. It's one of the reasons I want off of quetiapine asap but crashing down at the speed I have from 150mg to 50mg in a few months I need to stabilise for a bit now so no more med changes until next year now then a slow titration of Q downward.

[Nikki74]

3 minutes ago, Staz said:

TD is a side effect of antipsychotics and you aren't on any that I can see Nikki so don't worry about it. It's one of the reasons I want off of quetiapine asap but crashing down at the speed I have from 150mg to 50mg in a few months I need to stabilise for a bit now so no more med changes until next year now then a slow titration of Q downward.

Thanks, I’m not but phenargan is a mild antipsychotic even though it’s for nausea. 

 

I’ll respond to your other post a bit later. Thank you for writing! 

[Staz]

18 minutes ago, Nikki74 said:

Thanks, I’m not but phenargan is a mild antipsychotic even though it’s for nausea. 

 

I’ll respond to your other post a bit later. Thank you for writing! 

Seriously don't worry about phenargan Nikki as it's benign and really only affects the histamine receptors which don't cause TD. you need to be on a good dose of an antipsychotic for a while to run the risk of TD and even then you are talking <5%. I've more to be worried about on that score than you so put it out of your mind.

 

[Nikki74]

3 hours ago, Staz said:

Seriously don't worry about phenargan Nikki as it's benign and really only affects the histamine receptors which don't cause TD. you need to be on a good dose of an antipsychotic for a while to run the risk of TD and even then you are talking <5%. I've more to be worried about on that score than you so put it out of your mind.

 

Thank you dear Staz. That was reassuring. And you’ll get off the Quetiapine. We’ll do this together.

 

Seems we’re on similar drugs after similar journeys. We will both get through this. I’m so sorry this has happened to you. 

 

Sorry to Bubble for that post.

 

My withdrawal head can convince me of all sorts!! 

[Nikki74]

Severe fatigue and dizziness today. Occasional pain in a specific spot on the right of my head. Akathisia continues so can’t get peace. Some mental symptoms have lessened. Mostly bed bound today. Feels like flu. Off my food but forcing myself to eat.

 

A friend came and held my hand and we prayed together a lot. 

 

I had a moment where I was able to surrender and rest for half an hour.

 

 

 

[Nikki74]

Dear Lord

 

The wave continues but is changing shape a little. 

 

Racing head

burning and shaking head

shaking body on waking

Fear

Internal restlessness 

severe fatigue

Dread

Upset tummy

severe cognitive difficulties 

coordination issues

dizziness

 

Am working on surrendering 

 

 

[AliG]

Hi Nikki. How are you going with the timing of your doses? Did you manage to work out the timing in a way that you were comfortable with? I'm so sorry I didn't get back to you ~ I've been dealing with my own wave and had to take a step back for just a little while.

 

Regarding the throat spasms: it could be withdrawal or possibly a reaction to the Phenergan. Perhaps the sedative effect collapsed your airway. It's interesting though, as there are others who are also experiencing very similar symptoms.

 

How is the akathisia? What do you do to help relieve it?

 

Its great that you are working on surrender and I have also found acceptance to be a skill worth cultivating throughout this process. The windows and waves do change , as you're already experiencing. I have always considered that to be a positive sign of the system re-calibrating itself, just like the Rubik's Cube example of healing.

[UnfoldingSky]

Nikki, you are doing a commendable job getting through this.  I'm praying for you getting some relief.  Looks like we both had a day of dizziness, was having the same issue over here.  Will check in later on today, have to go to bed now.  It's going to get better, please trust that it will.  If you can try envisioning what you'd like to do when you've recovered, sometimes that helped me in my worst moments. 

[Nikki74]

3 hours ago, AliG said:

Hi Nikki. How are you going with the timing of your doses? Did you manage to work out the timing in a way that you were comfortable with? I'm so sorry I didn't get back to you ~ I've been dealing with my own wave and had to take a step back for just a little while.

Hi AliG, I’m sorry you’ve been dealing with a wave. Thank you for writing and I hope you’re picking up a bit.

 

I have stuck with timings that are midway between the old time and new tIme, so my dosing has shifted by 30 minutes for each med.

 

 

Quote

Regarding the throat spasms: it could be withdrawal or possibly a reaction to the Phenergan. Perhaps the sedative effect collapsed your airway. It's interesting though, as there are others who are also experiencing very similar symptoms.

 

It’s a strange one. Trying not to worry about it though. Interested that others are getting it. Glad I’m not alone! 

Quote

How is the akathisia? What do you do to help relieve it?

 

Today it’s been quite minimal thankfully, still present but more the mental aka of being unable to focus on one thing, plus some sense of it in my legs and arms and back, I find nothing relieves it, just have to live with it. It’s the worst symptom I think and that’s saying something.

Quote

Its great that you are working on surrender and I have also found acceptance to be a skill worth cultivating throughout this process. The windows and waves do change , as you're already experiencing. I have always considered that to be a positive sign of the system re-calibrating itself, just like the Rubik's Cube example of healing.

Thanks for this. 

 

I am troubled by quite how weak I have become this past week, I have CFS anyway and this is like that but extreme plus with the horrid withdrawal symptoms on top. It’s like flu.

 

I do worry about quite how much meds I’ve ct’d/ changed this year and if I’m going to be stuck like this for years to come. People tapering one of them like lexapro have a hard time let alone ct’ing! Plus the pregabalin and Zopiclone... Plus my CFS anyway.

 

Then when I stabilise I’ve got a benzo to get off let alone the lexapro and remeron. I just feel so daunted and like the next few years of my life will be like this. My life was already on hold with the CFS.

Might I be feeling any better spring next year?! Of course I pray I get windows before that. But stability seems like a myth considering what I’ve ct’d and I wasn’t doing great before that.

 

Any words of hope appreciated. 

Edited November 9, 2017 by Nikki74

[Nikki74]

Head burning this afternoon

Akathisia is up again 

feelings of hopelessness and terror

Anxiety

Depression

Shaky head

Some face twitches sometimes like my lips

 

So fatigued I’ve had to be in bed all day apart from getting food.

 

Praying this passes or eases soon 

 

My period is finished now so thought things might ease with that but no sign yet.

 

Please, any hope would be good.

 

Scared this is in for the long term. 

 

 

[Nikki74]

Slight dip in the most distressing symptoms now. 5pm. Just taken my last Diazepam of the day. 

 

I seem to be getting a peak peak in my symptoms upon waking until I take my first diazepam. Then from around 2pm until 5pm it’s extreme fear, akathisia, panic, dr/dp, depression, crying, reaching out to people, a desperate attempt to find some escape from the horror.

 

5pm and my body is at least quieter. Warm still legs. Still have head burning/ zapping a bit.

 

I’ve not showered for a week and all the little things I was starting to do like being able to manage finances a bit, think beyond my symptoms, have been gone again these past 8 days. Literally just survival.

 

 

[UnfoldingSky]

Nikki, how are you doing?  Any respite, were you able to sleep?

 

About the symptoms peaking in the morning, this is a very common pattern it seems most people get.  I think it was on this site we had a thread called I.Hate.Cortisol.Mornings. about this effect.  I would feel worse in the morning too.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Nikki74]

45 minutes ago, UnfoldingSky said:

Nikki, how are you doing?  Any respite, were you able to sleep?

 

About the symptoms peaking in the morning, this is a very common pattern it seems most people get.  I think it was on this site we had a thread called I.Hate.Cortisol.Mornings. about this effect.  I would feel worse in the morning too.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hi US

 

I did sleep.

 

My anxiety was low at very first. But it’s going up since about 8am.

 

I honestly fear I’m going mad as I’m on my own all day and don’t go anywhere just do the same things dealing with symptoms. 

 

But Im too weak to go out and suffer so badly with anxiety and raw nerves.

 

I feel so desperate. My head is just stuck. 

 

Is this normal for withdrawal? Honestly I feel I’m going mad. I don’t know how to shake things up so I have something new for my head. It’s just the same day in and out. I’ve been too ill to do anything that feeds my soul.

Edited November 10, 2017 by Nikki74

[UnfoldingSky]

Hi Nikki,  I don't think you are mad, everything you write sounds very grounded.

 

Also, is anyone coming by to see you on a regular basis?  I hate to think of you alone all day when it's as bad as it's been lately.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[UnfoldingSky]

Good to hear about the sleep too, how many hours?

 

[Nikki74]

31 minutes ago, UnfoldingSky said:

Good to hear about the sleep too, how many hours?

 

I got 6 hours but woke once to pee.

 

im scared I’m in benzo withdrawal as I’d been on 3.75-7.5 mg Zopiclone for 7 weeks and my Diazepam use was erratic. Was advised here to find a dose to stick at after I’d come off the zop, Shep worked out 5.5mg but I stuck at 6mg. Now thinking I should have been on a higher dose to compensate for the zop and my use of diazepam which had been anywhere from 0 to 10mg a day in July but mainly about 4mg, then for three weeks was on average 7.5mg as the Zopiclone stopped working but felt so revved up by the diazepam. Then I stopped the Zop during that time and some days took 8mg diazepam other days less. So we arrived at the 5.5mg but I stuck at 6mg. Don’t know if that makes sense. 

 

Dont want to updose but dont don’t know if what I’m on is going to get me through.

 

Been holding for about 6 weeks now on that and my other meds.

 

No one comes regularly, a friend once a week. My sister is coming shortly as I reached out in despair.

 

 

Edited November 10, 2017 by Nikki74

[Nikki74]

My Sister got me out for a drive to Dartmoor and I sat on a bench breathing the wild fresh air and trying to connect with the incredible nature around me. My symptoms were present but I tried to absorb as much as I could.

 

So grateful I got out with my dear Sister.

 

Got home and collapsed in bed so weak.

 

I tried to rest with nature sounds but I kept getting spikes of fear, jolting me. Then a wave of sheer mental terror took hold. There was nothing I could do. I get head burning as it intensifies. 

 

I seem to be getting this terror in the am and mid pm now. It HAD gone before this wave and I’m praying it passes.

 

I then started humming a song which stopped it a bit. Now lifted a bit. 

 

Q. It seems to come about an hour or two after diazepam. Coincidence? 

[Frogie]

1 minute ago, Nikki74 said:

My Sister got me out for a drive to Dartmoor and I sat on a bench breathing the wild fresh air and trying to connect with the incredible nature around me. My symptoms were present but I tried to absorb as much as I could.

 

So grateful I got out with my dear Sister.

 

Got home and collapsed in bed so weak.

 

I tried to rest with nature sounds but I kept getting spikes of fear, jolting me. Then a wave of sheer mental terror took hold. There was nothing I could do. I get head burning as it intensifies. 

 

I seem to be getting this terror in the am and mid pm now. It HAD gone before this wave and I’m praying it passes.

 

I then started humming a song which stopped it a bit. Now lifted a bit. 

 

Q. It seems to come about an hour or two after diazepam. Coincidence? 

I'm glad you got out and got some fresh air, that's always good for you.

 

I am having a lot of anxiety this morning. I think everything has caught up with me and my body doesn't know what to do.

 

I tapered off of diazepam a couple of years ago, but never had a problem with it. I take Xanax, and at the moment it's not helping.

 

You will be fine. Big deep belly breathes, in and out. 

 

I hope you feel feel better very soon.

 

Take care,

Frogie xx

[AliG]

Hi Nikki. What is the pattern with Diazepam? is it still 6 mg , 3 x day?  Is it even and what times/ exactly?

[Nikki74]

27 minutes ago, AliG said:

Hi Nikki. What is the pattern with Diazepam? is it still 6 mg , 3 x day?  Is it even and what times/ exactly?

Hi AliG

 

I take

2mg 8.30am

 

2mg 12.30pm

 

2mg 4.30pm

 

It’s now 6pm and my symptoms are going up again, twitching face, head burning and the fear is rising. 

 

Seems in this wave I get a surge as I say after taking the diazepam like an hour or two later.

Edited November 10, 2017 by Nikki74

[AliG]

It's probably because your body wants more. It's addictive physiologically but eventually you will hopefully hop off. 

 

Have you tried Magnesium?

[Nikki74]

It was like this in the early days before I joined here, like in August, I distinctly remember getting these surges about an hour and a half after taking a diazepam. Like adrenaline in my body and head. Then one day I was freaked out because I felt violent like I could throw something across the room, I’ve been getting that this time. Though today it was self harm thoughts, felt like I might explode. Same time frame after diazepam. Is it the drug or the wave? 

[Frogie]

Ali:

 

I don't want to "hog" Nikki's thread at all. I will write on my thread if you could answer me.

 

Thanks!