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kesh: akathisia, parasomnia, anxiety


kesh

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I'm now wondering how to work on my baseline symptoms, depression, anxiety and insomnia. The ones I had before going on meds. The ones I will face as I come off meds. I had them intermittently, not permanently.

 

As is usual for people like us, my mind is looping between hope and fear. I'm not sure I have the energy to do the exercises to get away from my thought spirals. 

Current daily meds. Citalopram 2.5mg morning. Diazapam 1.5mg evening, Propanalol 40mg split 4x10mg throughout day.

 

Recent meds. Fluoxetine 20mg began 24th Nov 2017, CT on 4th December on medical advice due to bad Akathisia. Citalopram 10mg began on 13th Dec 2017, tapered to 2.5mg by 20th Dec 2017 on medical advice. Diazapam 2mg began on 6th Dec 2017 cut to 1.5 mg on 26th Dec. Propanalol 40mg began on 13th Dec. Zopiclone 3.75 mg began 13th December, used maybe 5 times then quit.

 

Previous history. Tricyclics, Fluoxetine or Citalopram for periods of 6mo to 2yrs over last 25 years. Probably 5 yrs in total. No significant ill effects.

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Woke up with akathisia. This is regular as clockwork at the moment, every other day. It usually lasts until early evening. Though as this feels worse than the last one, who knows.

 

Akathisia is hell. Trying not to panic, to tell myself this is a wave that will pass. Dutifully had my 2.5mg citalopram even though it's poisoning me.

 

Had two new symptoms in night. I woke up feeling my brain activity had sped up 1000 times. Later I woke up feeling my arms and hands were huge.

 

Tinnitus is quite strong today.

 

Doses as before. Can't wait for next scheduled cut of citalopram. 

Current daily meds. Citalopram 2.5mg morning. Diazapam 1.5mg evening, Propanalol 40mg split 4x10mg throughout day.

 

Recent meds. Fluoxetine 20mg began 24th Nov 2017, CT on 4th December on medical advice due to bad Akathisia. Citalopram 10mg began on 13th Dec 2017, tapered to 2.5mg by 20th Dec 2017 on medical advice. Diazapam 2mg began on 6th Dec 2017 cut to 1.5 mg on 26th Dec. Propanalol 40mg began on 13th Dec. Zopiclone 3.75 mg began 13th December, used maybe 5 times then quit.

 

Previous history. Tricyclics, Fluoxetine or Citalopram for periods of 6mo to 2yrs over last 25 years. Probably 5 yrs in total. No significant ill effects.

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Akathisia went at about 4pm. It's getting weirdly predictable. I have a 48 hour cycle: I sleep badly, wake up with aka, lasts until early evening, sleep well, have a good(ish) day. 

 

When I say sleep. Sleep feels like an acid trip, so many symptoms hit me then.

Current daily meds. Citalopram 2.5mg morning. Diazapam 1.5mg evening, Propanalol 40mg split 4x10mg throughout day.

 

Recent meds. Fluoxetine 20mg began 24th Nov 2017, CT on 4th December on medical advice due to bad Akathisia. Citalopram 10mg began on 13th Dec 2017, tapered to 2.5mg by 20th Dec 2017 on medical advice. Diazapam 2mg began on 6th Dec 2017 cut to 1.5 mg on 26th Dec. Propanalol 40mg began on 13th Dec. Zopiclone 3.75 mg began 13th December, used maybe 5 times then quit.

 

Previous history. Tricyclics, Fluoxetine or Citalopram for periods of 6mo to 2yrs over last 25 years. Probably 5 yrs in total. No significant ill effects.

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kesh, I saw your post on my thread, wanted to provide some hope that the akathisia will go.  I was on and off Celexa a number of times too and it did clear up, was as you said though hellish to live through.  I noticed upthread you weren't sure if the aka was you or not, from what I understand it's only caused by psychiatric drugs so try not to get too caught up in thinking the problem lies in you. 

 

I also for a time had a pattern like you describe where it was more prominent one day and the next so while on a benzo and Propranolol too.  I never did figure out why. 

 

Wishing you much healing and if you have any questions feel free to ask (though it may take some digging to find my thread!)

 

Warm wishes,

US

I am not a medical professional and nothing I say is a medical opinion or meant to be medical advice, please seek a competent and trusted medical professional to consult for all medical decisions.

 

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Thanks UnfoldingSky. I think I've read too many horror stories of people who have it for years. But realistically, I have it intermittently, so know my brain can be free of it.

 

Anyway. Todays journal.

 

Same meds as before. Slept about 6 hours and pretty normally. Not like yesterday's weirdness. Woke up conventionally depressed and a bit anxious. No aka.

Current daily meds. Citalopram 2.5mg morning. Diazapam 1.5mg evening, Propanalol 40mg split 4x10mg throughout day.

 

Recent meds. Fluoxetine 20mg began 24th Nov 2017, CT on 4th December on medical advice due to bad Akathisia. Citalopram 10mg began on 13th Dec 2017, tapered to 2.5mg by 20th Dec 2017 on medical advice. Diazapam 2mg began on 6th Dec 2017 cut to 1.5 mg on 26th Dec. Propanalol 40mg began on 13th Dec. Zopiclone 3.75 mg began 13th December, used maybe 5 times then quit.

 

Previous history. Tricyclics, Fluoxetine or Citalopram for periods of 6mo to 2yrs over last 25 years. Probably 5 yrs in total. No significant ill effects.

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The anxiety has persisted all day. This is usually my good day in the cycle. Perhaps things are evening out. It usually eases later in the day. We'll see. Off to acupuncture, we'll see if that helps. It usually does while I'm having it.

Current daily meds. Citalopram 2.5mg morning. Diazapam 1.5mg evening, Propanalol 40mg split 4x10mg throughout day.

 

Recent meds. Fluoxetine 20mg began 24th Nov 2017, CT on 4th December on medical advice due to bad Akathisia. Citalopram 10mg began on 13th Dec 2017, tapered to 2.5mg by 20th Dec 2017 on medical advice. Diazapam 2mg began on 6th Dec 2017 cut to 1.5 mg on 26th Dec. Propanalol 40mg began on 13th Dec. Zopiclone 3.75 mg began 13th December, used maybe 5 times then quit.

 

Previous history. Tricyclics, Fluoxetine or Citalopram for periods of 6mo to 2yrs over last 25 years. Probably 5 yrs in total. No significant ill effects.

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On 29/12/2017 at 4:27 PM, kesh said:

That's my thoughts sometimes. A long taper is just more time to get more hooked. But I'm new to this.

 

 

Hello everyone.

This is what I think, that a very slow reduction is more time to get hooked. It's my concern with diazepam.

 

But does anyone know anything with a minimum of certainty? Why are psychiatrists so wrong? Is everything so strange to me...

 

Since JUN 2016: Sertraline. Took for 1 year, reduced & removed from 100 mg in 2 months. OFF Sertraline since 11 AUG 2017

-OCT and NOV 2017: Hipericum-St.Johns Worth

-25 DEC 2017: took sertraline 1 pill 50 mg

-Since end DEC 2017: Diazepam 5 mg. Reduced gradually. OFF Diazepam since 30 MAR 2018. 

-Since end DEC 2017: magnesium, omega3. 

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1 hour ago, musk said:

Hello everyone.

This is what I think, that a very slow reduction is more time to get hooked. It's my concern with diazepam.

 

But does anyone know anything with a minimum of certainty? Why are psychiatrists so wrong? Is everything so strange to me...

 

Yes, we're all groping around in the dark, and sites like this are taking notes and trying to learn from our progress. 

 

I cut 25% from my valium after a few weeks use. I felt it. It wasn't unbearable but it wasn't nice. If I was in work I'd have had to take time off for instance. Next cut will be more gentle.

Current daily meds. Citalopram 2.5mg morning. Diazapam 1.5mg evening, Propanalol 40mg split 4x10mg throughout day.

 

Recent meds. Fluoxetine 20mg began 24th Nov 2017, CT on 4th December on medical advice due to bad Akathisia. Citalopram 10mg began on 13th Dec 2017, tapered to 2.5mg by 20th Dec 2017 on medical advice. Diazapam 2mg began on 6th Dec 2017 cut to 1.5 mg on 26th Dec. Propanalol 40mg began on 13th Dec. Zopiclone 3.75 mg began 13th December, used maybe 5 times then quit.

 

Previous history. Tricyclics, Fluoxetine or Citalopram for periods of 6mo to 2yrs over last 25 years. Probably 5 yrs in total. No significant ill effects.

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2 minutes ago, kesh said:

Yes, we're all groping around in the dark, and sites like this are taking notes and trying to learn from our progress. 

 

I cut 25% from my valium after a few weeks use. I felt it. It wasn't unbearable but it wasn't nice. If I was in work I'd have had to take time off for instance. Next cut will be more gentle.

but my fear is this: how do we know that what happens to us is withdrawal syndrome and not mental illness?

 

I am out of sertraline since 5 months and I have never been so bad!

Since JUN 2016: Sertraline. Took for 1 year, reduced & removed from 100 mg in 2 months. OFF Sertraline since 11 AUG 2017

-OCT and NOV 2017: Hipericum-St.Johns Worth

-25 DEC 2017: took sertraline 1 pill 50 mg

-Since end DEC 2017: Diazepam 5 mg. Reduced gradually. OFF Diazepam since 30 MAR 2018. 

-Since end DEC 2017: magnesium, omega3. 

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Or both. I know that I get mental illness, and I will have to deal with it without drugs, because I have such a bad reaction to drugs. I also know last summer I was mentally well, and had been drug free for years. So my brain can be fine without drugs. I just have to find out how.

Current daily meds. Citalopram 2.5mg morning. Diazapam 1.5mg evening, Propanalol 40mg split 4x10mg throughout day.

 

Recent meds. Fluoxetine 20mg began 24th Nov 2017, CT on 4th December on medical advice due to bad Akathisia. Citalopram 10mg began on 13th Dec 2017, tapered to 2.5mg by 20th Dec 2017 on medical advice. Diazapam 2mg began on 6th Dec 2017 cut to 1.5 mg on 26th Dec. Propanalol 40mg began on 13th Dec. Zopiclone 3.75 mg began 13th December, used maybe 5 times then quit.

 

Previous history. Tricyclics, Fluoxetine or Citalopram for periods of 6mo to 2yrs over last 25 years. Probably 5 yrs in total. No significant ill effects.

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2 minutes ago, kesh said:

Or both. I know that I get mental illness, and I will have to deal with it without drugs, because I have such a bad reaction to drugs. I also know last summer I was mentally well, and had been drug free for years. So my brain can be fine without drugs. I just have to find out how.

but, how we know that what happens is a reaction to drugs and is not due to mental illness?

 

before medicating I had estres & depression with obsessive ideas. I was fine with the antidepressant (only 1 year). now 5 months since I left, I'm much worse than before, I'm in hell.

Since JUN 2016: Sertraline. Took for 1 year, reduced & removed from 100 mg in 2 months. OFF Sertraline since 11 AUG 2017

-OCT and NOV 2017: Hipericum-St.Johns Worth

-25 DEC 2017: took sertraline 1 pill 50 mg

-Since end DEC 2017: Diazepam 5 mg. Reduced gradually. OFF Diazepam since 30 MAR 2018. 

-Since end DEC 2017: magnesium, omega3. 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi Kesh,

 

I have learned, personally, that I am basically human.........with some variations, oh many variations, in my response to life.  Sure, I could define myself as "mentally ill" from time to time........when I struggle a bit, to learn new ways of coping with ordinary challenges that most all of us humans in developed countries(I can't speculate too much on those in undeveloped countries), have to deal with.  I don't find it helpful at all anymore to do so........define myself as mentally ill.  Usually it's more going on then just the mental, and I believe that is often the case for most of us.  Physiological, Spirtual. 

 

So you had a period last summer of being mentally well.  Can you describe that?  Was everything roses and sunshine?  The benzo's do result in depression for many users.  And believe me.........you are not the first to want something, anything in the form of a happy or symptom relieving pill for a quick fix.  I think you are learning that often times the quick fix turns into something longer(as far as difficulties go).  Perhaps then one realizes that there are rarely quick fixes and absolutes.  I may be going off on a tangent here.......:blink:  So just bear with me.

 

1 hour ago, kesh said:

Yes, we're all groping around in the dark, and sites like this are taking notes and trying to learn from our progress. 

 

I cut 25% from my valium after a few weeks use. I felt it. It wasn't unbearable but it wasn't nice. If I was in work I'd have had to take time off for instance. Next cut will be more gentle.

 

We're not here, SurvivingAntidepressants, I mean........to solely study people and their withdrawal experiences.  Sure we are all here(on earth) to learn, and pass on the information where it may be helpful.   And here at this site to support others as they go through withdrawal and hopefully minimize some of their withdrawal symptoms.  Have you read some of the published articles down at the bottom of the Home page.  Perhaps those will appeal to you?   Thank goodness though, for those who do actively speak on out, and publish and keep plugging away, at the change that is so needed in mental health care.  Even those who just share their experiences. 

 

On 1/7/2018 at 1:28 PM, kesh said:

I'm now wondering how to work on my baseline symptoms, depression, anxiety and insomnia. The ones I had before going on meds. The ones I will face as I come off meds. I had them intermittently, not permanently.

 

As is usual for people like us, my mind is looping between hope and fear. I'm not sure I have the energy to do the exercises to get away from my thought spirals. 

 

1 hour ago, kesh said:

Or both. I know that I get mental illness, and I will have to deal with it without drugs, because I have such a bad reaction to drugs. I also know last summer I was mentally well, and had been drug free for years. So my brain can be fine without drugs. I just have to find out how.

 

Yup.  I hear you.  I do.  I don't think anything is permanent.  I used to find some good stuff to deal just from reading other peoples threads and following the suggestions given to them, even when sometimes they didn't, or weren't able to, or whatever.  And slowly just started to change, how I approached most things.  I mean......I'm still getting there........my normality.......so to speak......:o  A new normal. 

 

And yup.  You ARE starting to heal.

 

Best,

mmt

Edited by manymoretodays

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

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Thanks for the responses guys.

 

Musk, why did you come off the medication? And do you think you came off too quickly? 

 

Yes MMT, I've read pretty much everything. Linked here and stuff I have found myself. I don't mind calling what I have experienced mental illness or anything else.

 

On with the journal. Acupuncture was great. Became super relaxed and fell asleep. From anxious insomniac to sleeping as easily as a cat. Always remarkable. 

 

Later on I felt quite activated, idk if mild akathisia or just restless or just energised in a good way, but I'm interpreting every slight feeling negatively and with anxiety.

Current daily meds. Citalopram 2.5mg morning. Diazapam 1.5mg evening, Propanalol 40mg split 4x10mg throughout day.

 

Recent meds. Fluoxetine 20mg began 24th Nov 2017, CT on 4th December on medical advice due to bad Akathisia. Citalopram 10mg began on 13th Dec 2017, tapered to 2.5mg by 20th Dec 2017 on medical advice. Diazapam 2mg began on 6th Dec 2017 cut to 1.5 mg on 26th Dec. Propanalol 40mg began on 13th Dec. Zopiclone 3.75 mg began 13th December, used maybe 5 times then quit.

 

Previous history. Tricyclics, Fluoxetine or Citalopram for periods of 6mo to 2yrs over last 25 years. Probably 5 yrs in total. No significant ill effects.

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13 hours ago, kesh said:

 Off to acupuncture, we'll see if that helps. It usually does while I'm having it.

 

This is quite a good sign, I couldn't handle acupuncture when I had akathisia. Hopefully it means you can speed up recovery.

 

Or at least means you found a better practitioner than I had!

 

I am not a medical professional and nothing I say is a medical opinion or meant to be medical advice, please seek a competent and trusted medical professional to consult for all medical decisions.

 

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7 hours ago, kesh said:

 

Musk, why did you come off the medication? And do you think you came off too quickly? 

I never agreed to medicate myself, but in a moment of crisis I gave up, and I kept the medication for 1 year. That year I was fine.

 

And that's how I said "enough", and I asked the psychiatrist to leave it. Yes, I think it was too fast (from 100 mg to 0 in 1 month and a half).

 

Now I'm about to give up, I can not stand this situation and suffering, especially the great fear I have that my body will get ill from a serious and incurable disease because of cronic stress.

Since JUN 2016: Sertraline. Took for 1 year, reduced & removed from 100 mg in 2 months. OFF Sertraline since 11 AUG 2017

-OCT and NOV 2017: Hipericum-St.Johns Worth

-25 DEC 2017: took sertraline 1 pill 50 mg

-Since end DEC 2017: Diazepam 5 mg. Reduced gradually. OFF Diazepam since 30 MAR 2018. 

-Since end DEC 2017: magnesium, omega3. 

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1 hour ago, UnfoldingSky said:

 

This is quite a good sign, I couldn't handle acupuncture when I had akathisia. Hopefully it means you can speed up recovery.

 

Or at least means you found a better practitioner than I had!

 

Who knows. It helps at the time. I feel normal, relaxed, and usually sleep when I'm on the acupuncture table. But regular as clockwork I get akathasia every 48 hours, from waking up in the morning to early evening. Maybe this is exacerbated by the acupuncture. Maybe not.

 

Anything in particular make your akathisia go away? I'm torn between cutting the offending medication more quickly than 10% a month to see if it eases, or following the recommended cut rate and hope for stability. 

 

Today is an akathisia day. No change in medication. Maybe 5 hours sleep. 

Current daily meds. Citalopram 2.5mg morning. Diazapam 1.5mg evening, Propanalol 40mg split 4x10mg throughout day.

 

Recent meds. Fluoxetine 20mg began 24th Nov 2017, CT on 4th December on medical advice due to bad Akathisia. Citalopram 10mg began on 13th Dec 2017, tapered to 2.5mg by 20th Dec 2017 on medical advice. Diazapam 2mg began on 6th Dec 2017 cut to 1.5 mg on 26th Dec. Propanalol 40mg began on 13th Dec. Zopiclone 3.75 mg began 13th December, used maybe 5 times then quit.

 

Previous history. Tricyclics, Fluoxetine or Citalopram for periods of 6mo to 2yrs over last 25 years. Probably 5 yrs in total. No significant ill effects.

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33 minutes ago, musk said:

I never agreed to medicate myself, but in a moment of crisis I gave up, and I kept the medication for 1 year. That year I was fine.

 

And that's how I said "enough", and I asked the psychiatrist to leave it. Yes, I think it was too fast (from 100 mg to 0 in 1 month and a half).

 

Now I'm about to give up, I can not stand this situation and suffering, especially the great fear I have that my body will get ill from a serious and incurable disease because of cronic stress.

I also fear that the stress of akathisia will hurt my body permanently, but I also know anxiety leads to such fears. 

 

Did you ever attempt to reinstate your anti depressant?

Current daily meds. Citalopram 2.5mg morning. Diazapam 1.5mg evening, Propanalol 40mg split 4x10mg throughout day.

 

Recent meds. Fluoxetine 20mg began 24th Nov 2017, CT on 4th December on medical advice due to bad Akathisia. Citalopram 10mg began on 13th Dec 2017, tapered to 2.5mg by 20th Dec 2017 on medical advice. Diazapam 2mg began on 6th Dec 2017 cut to 1.5 mg on 26th Dec. Propanalol 40mg began on 13th Dec. Zopiclone 3.75 mg began 13th December, used maybe 5 times then quit.

 

Previous history. Tricyclics, Fluoxetine or Citalopram for periods of 6mo to 2yrs over last 25 years. Probably 5 yrs in total. No significant ill effects.

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9 minutes ago, kesh said:

I also fear that the stress of akathisia will hurt my body permanently, but I also know anxiety leads to such fears. 

 

Did you ever attempt to reinstate your anti depressant?

No. Because my fall has been very gradual, until 5 months I was not so bad.

Since JUN 2016: Sertraline. Took for 1 year, reduced & removed from 100 mg in 2 months. OFF Sertraline since 11 AUG 2017

-OCT and NOV 2017: Hipericum-St.Johns Worth

-25 DEC 2017: took sertraline 1 pill 50 mg

-Since end DEC 2017: Diazepam 5 mg. Reduced gradually. OFF Diazepam since 30 MAR 2018. 

-Since end DEC 2017: magnesium, omega3. 

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3 hours ago, musk said:

No. Because my fall has been very gradual, until 5 months I was not so bad.

What are your plans? Hold on until things ease?

Current daily meds. Citalopram 2.5mg morning. Diazapam 1.5mg evening, Propanalol 40mg split 4x10mg throughout day.

 

Recent meds. Fluoxetine 20mg began 24th Nov 2017, CT on 4th December on medical advice due to bad Akathisia. Citalopram 10mg began on 13th Dec 2017, tapered to 2.5mg by 20th Dec 2017 on medical advice. Diazapam 2mg began on 6th Dec 2017 cut to 1.5 mg on 26th Dec. Propanalol 40mg began on 13th Dec. Zopiclone 3.75 mg began 13th December, used maybe 5 times then quit.

 

Previous history. Tricyclics, Fluoxetine or Citalopram for periods of 6mo to 2yrs over last 25 years. Probably 5 yrs in total. No significant ill effects.

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26 minutes ago, kesh said:

What are your plans? Hold on until things ease?

I do not have a plan, I am desperate I have fear and lack of control. things always ease? I do not know whether to believe that things will improve, sometimes they do not improve.

 

If I knew things would ease, I would hold on. but you can not know the future. I also believe that I am risking my health withstanding these symptoms.

Since JUN 2016: Sertraline. Took for 1 year, reduced & removed from 100 mg in 2 months. OFF Sertraline since 11 AUG 2017

-OCT and NOV 2017: Hipericum-St.Johns Worth

-25 DEC 2017: took sertraline 1 pill 50 mg

-Since end DEC 2017: Diazepam 5 mg. Reduced gradually. OFF Diazepam since 30 MAR 2018. 

-Since end DEC 2017: magnesium, omega3. 

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I know that feeling. If I knew guaranteed that this ended, I'd hold on as long as it takes. And you read stories where people recover, and the horror stories where they don't. Remember, most people who get well stop posting about it and you don't hear their recovery stories. So you are much more likely to hear the horror stories. 

Current daily meds. Citalopram 2.5mg morning. Diazapam 1.5mg evening, Propanalol 40mg split 4x10mg throughout day.

 

Recent meds. Fluoxetine 20mg began 24th Nov 2017, CT on 4th December on medical advice due to bad Akathisia. Citalopram 10mg began on 13th Dec 2017, tapered to 2.5mg by 20th Dec 2017 on medical advice. Diazapam 2mg began on 6th Dec 2017 cut to 1.5 mg on 26th Dec. Propanalol 40mg began on 13th Dec. Zopiclone 3.75 mg began 13th December, used maybe 5 times then quit.

 

Previous history. Tricyclics, Fluoxetine or Citalopram for periods of 6mo to 2yrs over last 25 years. Probably 5 yrs in total. No significant ill effects.

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Anyway. Back to my journal. My akathisia ended just after noon (earlier than usual), as it has before: with a wave of exhaustion, and my pacing (I was going for a walk) suddenly became a snail's crawl.

 

That it ended sooner I'll take as a good sign.

Current daily meds. Citalopram 2.5mg morning. Diazapam 1.5mg evening, Propanalol 40mg split 4x10mg throughout day.

 

Recent meds. Fluoxetine 20mg began 24th Nov 2017, CT on 4th December on medical advice due to bad Akathisia. Citalopram 10mg began on 13th Dec 2017, tapered to 2.5mg by 20th Dec 2017 on medical advice. Diazapam 2mg began on 6th Dec 2017 cut to 1.5 mg on 26th Dec. Propanalol 40mg began on 13th Dec. Zopiclone 3.75 mg began 13th December, used maybe 5 times then quit.

 

Previous history. Tricyclics, Fluoxetine or Citalopram for periods of 6mo to 2yrs over last 25 years. Probably 5 yrs in total. No significant ill effects.

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6 hours ago, UnfoldingSky said:

 

This is quite a good sign, I couldn't handle acupuncture when I had akathisia. Hopefully it means you can speed up recovery.

 

Or at least means you found a better practitioner than I had!

 

I'e only ever had it in a window but basically if i felt like i do on the acupuncturist's table all the time i'd be fixed.

Current daily meds. Citalopram 2.5mg morning. Diazapam 1.5mg evening, Propanalol 40mg split 4x10mg throughout day.

 

Recent meds. Fluoxetine 20mg began 24th Nov 2017, CT on 4th December on medical advice due to bad Akathisia. Citalopram 10mg began on 13th Dec 2017, tapered to 2.5mg by 20th Dec 2017 on medical advice. Diazapam 2mg began on 6th Dec 2017 cut to 1.5 mg on 26th Dec. Propanalol 40mg began on 13th Dec. Zopiclone 3.75 mg began 13th December, used maybe 5 times then quit.

 

Previous history. Tricyclics, Fluoxetine or Citalopram for periods of 6mo to 2yrs over last 25 years. Probably 5 yrs in total. No significant ill effects.

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So the window, that came quicker than normal, left me exhausted. A kind of exhausted that somehow feels healing.

Current daily meds. Citalopram 2.5mg morning. Diazapam 1.5mg evening, Propanalol 40mg split 4x10mg throughout day.

 

Recent meds. Fluoxetine 20mg began 24th Nov 2017, CT on 4th December on medical advice due to bad Akathisia. Citalopram 10mg began on 13th Dec 2017, tapered to 2.5mg by 20th Dec 2017 on medical advice. Diazapam 2mg began on 6th Dec 2017 cut to 1.5 mg on 26th Dec. Propanalol 40mg began on 13th Dec. Zopiclone 3.75 mg began 13th December, used maybe 5 times then quit.

 

Previous history. Tricyclics, Fluoxetine or Citalopram for periods of 6mo to 2yrs over last 25 years. Probably 5 yrs in total. No significant ill effects.

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10 hours ago, kesh said:

So the window, that came quicker than normal, left me exhausted. A kind of exhausted that somehow feels healing.

 

kesh, very good to hear!

I am not a medical professional and nothing I say is a medical opinion or meant to be medical advice, please seek a competent and trusted medical professional to consult for all medical decisions.

 

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The good day/bad day cycle has ended. The last two "good days" weren't good. Today was meant to be a good day but woke with akathisia after 6 hours sleep. Trying to resist it, or not panic about it, hoping for the window to come in the afternoon as usual, hoping this is a temporary set back from my diazapam cut 16 days ago, but I trust nothing to happen as it did before. I suppose one good sign is I fell asleep easily without any weirdness.

 

My thread title should really be akathisia is ruining my life.

 

Medication all as before.

Current daily meds. Citalopram 2.5mg morning. Diazapam 1.5mg evening, Propanalol 40mg split 4x10mg throughout day.

 

Recent meds. Fluoxetine 20mg began 24th Nov 2017, CT on 4th December on medical advice due to bad Akathisia. Citalopram 10mg began on 13th Dec 2017, tapered to 2.5mg by 20th Dec 2017 on medical advice. Diazapam 2mg began on 6th Dec 2017 cut to 1.5 mg on 26th Dec. Propanalol 40mg began on 13th Dec. Zopiclone 3.75 mg began 13th December, used maybe 5 times then quit.

 

Previous history. Tricyclics, Fluoxetine or Citalopram for periods of 6mo to 2yrs over last 25 years. Probably 5 yrs in total. No significant ill effects.

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Just thought I’d check in Kesh. I’m sorry to hear the akathisia is with you today and the cycle appears to have changed. Hoping you get your window later. It is probably to do with the cut and it’ll settle down again. 

 

My title would be the same by the way!

2009-2011 mirtazapine 45mg plus clonaz as needed. Start Lexapro Nov 2011. 

June 2016 Zopiclone, July-Sept Trazodone 50mg, adverse reaction, ct, started pregabalin, reduced Lexapro from 20 to 15mg

Start of 2017 on 15mg lexapro, 100mg pregablin. April added 15mg mirtazapine. End May.  Start June stop pregablin after two week taper.  End June.  Stopped Lexapro 15mg 3 wk taper. Start July Mirt 30mg + Diaz daily 2-4mg End July  returned to mirtaz 15mg + lexapro at 10mg reinstated. 4th Aug - 19 Sept Zopiclone (3.75 then 7.5 then 3.75 at the end)

diazepam 7-8mg day since then. 16 Sept cut lex to 5mg. 5-6 Oct swapped 5mg lex to 8.15am and 15mg mirtazipine to 11pm

8 Oct onwards sticking to 6mg diazepam p/day 3 doses/ 2 Feb start 1mg clonazepam, stop Diaz. 21 Feb 2% cut lex. 8 March 12.5% clon cut. Now take .5 clon 9am, .375 5pm(0.875 mg daily clonazepam) 16 May  @8% clon reduction so 9am dose .43(0.805 mg daily clonazepam)

2 July 10% Lexapro reduction to 4.5mg. 9 Aug .25mg lex cut  to 4.25mg/ 13 Aug 4.5mg

2018 October Lexapro 4.5 to 4.25 mg  clonazepam 0.80 mg  mirtazapine 15 mg

2019 October present drugs:  Lexapro 2.75 mg(tapers of 0.25 increments in last year at 5 -9 week intervals),  clonazepam 0.78 mg(taper of .02 mg November 2018),  mirtazapine 15 mg

2020 January 5th Lexapro taper to 2.57 mg(2%drop), total clonazepam 0.78 mg, mirtazapine 15 mg

previous signature here  recent dosing and symptom logs here

 

 

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It passed about 11am. Had an okay hour or two, could relax and concentrate enough to read a book, then the anxiety began.

 

Be interesting to see what happens in acupuncture today, I'm not normally in an anxy/aki way when I have it. Wonder if I'll be able to stay still.

Current daily meds. Citalopram 2.5mg morning. Diazapam 1.5mg evening, Propanalol 40mg split 4x10mg throughout day.

 

Recent meds. Fluoxetine 20mg began 24th Nov 2017, CT on 4th December on medical advice due to bad Akathisia. Citalopram 10mg began on 13th Dec 2017, tapered to 2.5mg by 20th Dec 2017 on medical advice. Diazapam 2mg began on 6th Dec 2017 cut to 1.5 mg on 26th Dec. Propanalol 40mg began on 13th Dec. Zopiclone 3.75 mg began 13th December, used maybe 5 times then quit.

 

Previous history. Tricyclics, Fluoxetine or Citalopram for periods of 6mo to 2yrs over last 25 years. Probably 5 yrs in total. No significant ill effects.

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So akathisia is back. This is new, as normally I get it in blocks, 8 hours, 10 hours. Today it's been rapidly turning on and off, an hour's relief then back on again.

 

Scary ****.

Current daily meds. Citalopram 2.5mg morning. Diazapam 1.5mg evening, Propanalol 40mg split 4x10mg throughout day.

 

Recent meds. Fluoxetine 20mg began 24th Nov 2017, CT on 4th December on medical advice due to bad Akathisia. Citalopram 10mg began on 13th Dec 2017, tapered to 2.5mg by 20th Dec 2017 on medical advice. Diazapam 2mg began on 6th Dec 2017 cut to 1.5 mg on 26th Dec. Propanalol 40mg began on 13th Dec. Zopiclone 3.75 mg began 13th December, used maybe 5 times then quit.

 

Previous history. Tricyclics, Fluoxetine or Citalopram for periods of 6mo to 2yrs over last 25 years. Probably 5 yrs in total. No significant ill effects.

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Akathisia stopped about 15 minutes before acupuncture, so was able to lie still. Fell asleep as usual. Afterwards akathisia started up again.

 

What should I make of this? Is this akathisia actually anxiety? Psychomotor agitation?

 

I only half believe in acupuncture. If a placebo effect can relax me so much that I fall asleep, is this all "in my head" now? I know that the akathisia was initially chemical, but is my behaviour now locked into copying that chemical effect through fear?

Current daily meds. Citalopram 2.5mg morning. Diazapam 1.5mg evening, Propanalol 40mg split 4x10mg throughout day.

 

Recent meds. Fluoxetine 20mg began 24th Nov 2017, CT on 4th December on medical advice due to bad Akathisia. Citalopram 10mg began on 13th Dec 2017, tapered to 2.5mg by 20th Dec 2017 on medical advice. Diazapam 2mg began on 6th Dec 2017 cut to 1.5 mg on 26th Dec. Propanalol 40mg began on 13th Dec. Zopiclone 3.75 mg began 13th December, used maybe 5 times then quit.

 

Previous history. Tricyclics, Fluoxetine or Citalopram for periods of 6mo to 2yrs over last 25 years. Probably 5 yrs in total. No significant ill effects.

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Now it's stopped again! Never known such rapid waves and windows. 

Current daily meds. Citalopram 2.5mg morning. Diazapam 1.5mg evening, Propanalol 40mg split 4x10mg throughout day.

 

Recent meds. Fluoxetine 20mg began 24th Nov 2017, CT on 4th December on medical advice due to bad Akathisia. Citalopram 10mg began on 13th Dec 2017, tapered to 2.5mg by 20th Dec 2017 on medical advice. Diazapam 2mg began on 6th Dec 2017 cut to 1.5 mg on 26th Dec. Propanalol 40mg began on 13th Dec. Zopiclone 3.75 mg began 13th December, used maybe 5 times then quit.

 

Previous history. Tricyclics, Fluoxetine or Citalopram for periods of 6mo to 2yrs over last 25 years. Probably 5 yrs in total. No significant ill effects.

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Hi Kesh

I’ve had rapid cycling of symptoms and I know it’s scary but it’s meant to be when there’s profound healing work going on. 

 

Nikki 

2009-2011 mirtazapine 45mg plus clonaz as needed. Start Lexapro Nov 2011. 

June 2016 Zopiclone, July-Sept Trazodone 50mg, adverse reaction, ct, started pregabalin, reduced Lexapro from 20 to 15mg

Start of 2017 on 15mg lexapro, 100mg pregablin. April added 15mg mirtazapine. End May.  Start June stop pregablin after two week taper.  End June.  Stopped Lexapro 15mg 3 wk taper. Start July Mirt 30mg + Diaz daily 2-4mg End July  returned to mirtaz 15mg + lexapro at 10mg reinstated. 4th Aug - 19 Sept Zopiclone (3.75 then 7.5 then 3.75 at the end)

diazepam 7-8mg day since then. 16 Sept cut lex to 5mg. 5-6 Oct swapped 5mg lex to 8.15am and 15mg mirtazipine to 11pm

8 Oct onwards sticking to 6mg diazepam p/day 3 doses/ 2 Feb start 1mg clonazepam, stop Diaz. 21 Feb 2% cut lex. 8 March 12.5% clon cut. Now take .5 clon 9am, .375 5pm(0.875 mg daily clonazepam) 16 May  @8% clon reduction so 9am dose .43(0.805 mg daily clonazepam)

2 July 10% Lexapro reduction to 4.5mg. 9 Aug .25mg lex cut  to 4.25mg/ 13 Aug 4.5mg

2018 October Lexapro 4.5 to 4.25 mg  clonazepam 0.80 mg  mirtazapine 15 mg

2019 October present drugs:  Lexapro 2.75 mg(tapers of 0.25 increments in last year at 5 -9 week intervals),  clonazepam 0.78 mg(taper of .02 mg November 2018),  mirtazapine 15 mg

2020 January 5th Lexapro taper to 2.57 mg(2%drop), total clonazepam 0.78 mg, mirtazapine 15 mg

previous signature here  recent dosing and symptom logs here

 

 

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  • ChessieCat changed the title to kesh: Parasomnia ruining my life
11 hours ago, Nikki74 said:

Hi Kesh

I’ve had rapid cycling of symptoms and I know it’s scary but it’s meant to be when there’s profound healing work going on. 

 

Nikki 

That's what I felt. Glad to hear it confirmed.

 

Journal stuff:

 

Last night was nice, watched TV with mum. Basically feeling normal except for the anxiety of feeling bad in the next wave. I kept saying to myself "acceptance". Easy to do when not in a wave.

 

This morning was interesting. Slept 1am to 6am, woke up feeling mild akathisia, maybe just anxiety  (sometimes it's hard to know where anxiety ends and mild akathesia begins) said "acceptance" to myself, and that with things changing so rapidly it might be gone soon. So then got three more hours of fitful sleep, riding waves.

 

Today is quite an anxious day so far. Not sure if I'm creating it, or whether it's the medication. 

Current daily meds. Citalopram 2.5mg morning. Diazapam 1.5mg evening, Propanalol 40mg split 4x10mg throughout day.

 

Recent meds. Fluoxetine 20mg began 24th Nov 2017, CT on 4th December on medical advice due to bad Akathisia. Citalopram 10mg began on 13th Dec 2017, tapered to 2.5mg by 20th Dec 2017 on medical advice. Diazapam 2mg began on 6th Dec 2017 cut to 1.5 mg on 26th Dec. Propanalol 40mg began on 13th Dec. Zopiclone 3.75 mg began 13th December, used maybe 5 times then quit.

 

Previous history. Tricyclics, Fluoxetine or Citalopram for periods of 6mo to 2yrs over last 25 years. Probably 5 yrs in total. No significant ill effects.

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Last night fell asleep pretty quickly. Woke at 5.30am with akathisia. Spent about an hour and a half in bed resisting it as usual. Then up for first cigarette of the day. Feels stronger than yesterday. Praying it ends after a few hours as usual, but who knows. Medication as normal. Very tired, but 4 or 5 hours sleep is pretty good by recent standards.

Current daily meds. Citalopram 2.5mg morning. Diazapam 1.5mg evening, Propanalol 40mg split 4x10mg throughout day.

 

Recent meds. Fluoxetine 20mg began 24th Nov 2017, CT on 4th December on medical advice due to bad Akathisia. Citalopram 10mg began on 13th Dec 2017, tapered to 2.5mg by 20th Dec 2017 on medical advice. Diazapam 2mg began on 6th Dec 2017 cut to 1.5 mg on 26th Dec. Propanalol 40mg began on 13th Dec. Zopiclone 3.75 mg began 13th December, used maybe 5 times then quit.

 

Previous history. Tricyclics, Fluoxetine or Citalopram for periods of 6mo to 2yrs over last 25 years. Probably 5 yrs in total. No significant ill effects.

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Akathisia hasn't stopped much. Got maybe an hour here and there where is reduced enough for me to sit and watch tv. Pretty scared. It's usually gone by now. Praying it stops by evening so I can get some sleep. 

Current daily meds. Citalopram 2.5mg morning. Diazapam 1.5mg evening, Propanalol 40mg split 4x10mg throughout day.

 

Recent meds. Fluoxetine 20mg began 24th Nov 2017, CT on 4th December on medical advice due to bad Akathisia. Citalopram 10mg began on 13th Dec 2017, tapered to 2.5mg by 20th Dec 2017 on medical advice. Diazapam 2mg began on 6th Dec 2017 cut to 1.5 mg on 26th Dec. Propanalol 40mg began on 13th Dec. Zopiclone 3.75 mg began 13th December, used maybe 5 times then quit.

 

Previous history. Tricyclics, Fluoxetine or Citalopram for periods of 6mo to 2yrs over last 25 years. Probably 5 yrs in total. No significant ill effects.

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It's not stopped but it is less so hopefully I will be able to sleep. Worst day in a while. Wondering if I' m getting worse.

Current daily meds. Citalopram 2.5mg morning. Diazapam 1.5mg evening, Propanalol 40mg split 4x10mg throughout day.

 

Recent meds. Fluoxetine 20mg began 24th Nov 2017, CT on 4th December on medical advice due to bad Akathisia. Citalopram 10mg began on 13th Dec 2017, tapered to 2.5mg by 20th Dec 2017 on medical advice. Diazapam 2mg began on 6th Dec 2017 cut to 1.5 mg on 26th Dec. Propanalol 40mg began on 13th Dec. Zopiclone 3.75 mg began 13th December, used maybe 5 times then quit.

 

Previous history. Tricyclics, Fluoxetine or Citalopram for periods of 6mo to 2yrs over last 25 years. Probably 5 yrs in total. No significant ill effects.

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