Jump to content
SurvivingAntidepressants.org is temporarily closed to new registrations until 1 April ×

Rosetta: cold switch May 2011 & too fast taper Feb 2017


Rosetta

Recommended Posts

@RosettaIm sorry you struggled last night, this morning and during the day, Rosetta. 

I am seeing that the traumas and feelings/emotions/physical symptoms of them have been there for years really but I didnt realize it.  I too was a perfectionist(now I cant do anything seems)...vacuuming was my thing...so long as things looked tidy and neat around me, because I am very visual, it made me feel tidy and neat and ok inside as well.  I ran on cortisol much of my life.

I wake nearly every morning thinking about home and how alone and lost and abandoned I feel....and some of that is real...and the tears start...again.  

 

I wonder if you have lost people in your life that have been like parents, if your fear of losing your best friend is linked to your husband and those thoughts?

 

I did run away from it all for years..he but was like being on a treadmill...just running endnote getting very far.  I think the emotions of the traumas and all are very real and are connected to physical symptoms as well.  I think the emotions are much stronger now because I am not fearlessly rushing through life to cover up my fear...which is what I did.  When all this forced me to stop, the fear Ive had all along and took pills for was still there.  

 

That little girl lives on inside of me... and reminds me of her feelings through dreams and physical and emotional feelings etc.  Im not sure when or how that will ever get better, especially now.  But I believe that healing will come....for you, for me, for others....its never too late..

 

You are so so special...and these feelings, I think, are coming up for a reason now...think it all happens when its right.

 

Thinking about you!💜

 

-Nardil 1976 < year, stopped. React to AD's. Klonopin .5BID 1990, 2.5mg til 2016

-Klonopin doubled Jan '16. Taper to 2.25mg May to Nov '16. Bad react to Lexapro, stop. React to Prevacid too, taper off. 

-November '16 Tapered .25mg Klonopin in hospital. Jan '17 started Viibryd, 20mg from Feb to June '17,     

-20mg to 10mg Viibryd from 3/25 to 6/10 2017, 12/15 10% Viibryd taper...back up next day

-Clonazepam 2mg to 1.85mg 4/14 '17 to end November; taper to 1mg Clonazepam in hospital 9/1 tp 9/14 '17

-Feb '18 Amiloride .25mg  5/18 off Amiloride d/t react. Clonaz compounded  

-4/27 '18 Viibryd 9.5mg, 6/11 9.0 mg, 1/27 '19 Viibryd 8.75mg, ; Clonazepam .2mg 530pm and .7mg 1130pm, Premarin .3mg 830PM CARAFATE QID 2/27/19 to 3/5/19

-July 6'19 1/2 10mg Claritin 230pm, stopped it about July 18, started Oct 11 '19, 

-7/27 Viibryd 8.5, 8/29 8.25, 10/24 8.0, 12/19 7.75, Feb '20 7.50, 3/20 7.25, 5/20 7.0, 6/20 6.75, 7/20 6.5, 8/20 6.25, 10/2 20 6.0, 11/25'20 5.75, 1/9/21 5.5, 2/23 5.25

-1015 AM Viibryd, vit D 4,000IU 130, 415 Clonazepam .2mg, 815 Premarin .3mg, 1015 Clonaz .7mg,

  1115 3t fish oil+D 1145 Castor Oil 650mg(4) 1230 Carafate 1/2GM,Methylated B Vit  1/week,Reacted Mag prn

Link to comment

@Rabe. You always know the right thing to say.  I wrote out a timeline of all the places I've lived and all the stressors I've had over the years.  Wow!  It's been a really awful ride.  I am in a much better place today even if I feel "off" and uncomfortable most of the time in my own home.  I'm glad I've been in the same place for almost 8 years.  Maybe I can make this feel like a home.  I'm sure that in 6 months everything will look brighter for both of us.

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus
2 hours ago, Rosetta said:

@Rabe. You always know the right thing to say.  I wrote out a timeline of all the places I've lived and all the stressors I've had over the years.  Wow!  It's been a really awful ride.  I am in a much better place today even if I feel "off" and uncomfortable most of the time in my own home.  I'm glad I've been in the same place for almost 8 years.  Maybe I can make this feel like a home.  I'm sure that in 6 months everything will look brighter for both of us.

 

I totally agree with you there Rosetta, 

 

@Rabe certainly knows the right thing to say. She’s always so encouraging. 

 

I hope that you’re able to make your house a home in time too. 

 

Sending hugs💚💚

Been on APs, benzos, ADs and opiates, for chronic pain. Had Akathisia in the past that made me suicidal. Still on Seroquel. 2019:➡️ March10=7.25mg ✔️ April17=7.0✔️ June5=6.75✔️ July14=6.50✔️ Aug28=6.25✔️ Oct10=6.20  ✔️ Oct21=6.0✔️ Dec16=5.80 ✔️ 2020➡️ Jan 21=5.60 ✔️ April2=5.40 ✔️ May29=5.20 ✔️ Aug14= 5.0 ✔️Sep29=4.80✔️2021➡️ Jan31=4.60 mg✔️ April24=4.40mg✔️Jul17=4.30mg ✔️ Aug 28=4.20 ✔️ Oct 11=4.15✔️Nov1=4.10 ✔️ Nov21= 4.05✔️ Dec13= 4mg ✔️2022 ➡️ Jan8=3.95✔️ Jan31=3.90✔️ March2=3.85 ✔️ April4=3.80 ✔️ June16=3.75✔️ July26=3.70✔️ Sep2=3.65✔️ Oct21=3.60 ✔️ Dec8=3.55✔️2023➡️ Jan 26=3.50✔️ March 17=3.45✔️ June12=3.40✔️ July30=3.35✔️ Sep14=3.30✔️ Oct31=3.25✔️This is NOT medical advice.Consult your doctor.

Link to comment

Journal:

 

Yesterday, the day got better.  By evening I felt ok.  We got some sushi, and I bought 3 outfits for school at a sale.  That's an improvement.  I found shopping for school very hard last year.  Quite a bit of what I bought online was too big so I had to go to the stores.  This year we will need less because I kept the stuff that didn't work last year.  

 

Sleep last night was ok.  The usual wake up at about 2:00 was probably accompanied by a cortisol spike.  I felt very anxious for quite a while about failing as a mother, the state of my house, being unable to have people over (except one friend who understands.)  I'm worried about my daughter having friends outside of school time, etc.. Feeling very inadequate.  I heated the shoulder wrap twice and finally feel back asleep.  

 

The anxiety was less this morning.  Laundry has piled up.  Nothing to wear.  Don't want to face finding clothes so that we can go out.  

 

I did feel motivation, earlier this morning before my daughter got up, to tackle the mess.  That's a good sign.  I didn't do it because  I was afraid of getting upset and having everyone wake up to me being in a bad mood.  But it's a good sign that I felt the motivation and the clear head to do something!  As soon as my daughter was up I felt overwhelmed as she started pulling things out to draw on, etc..

 

This is a frequent feeling -- her activity in pulling things out from where ever they are stuffed causes me a lot of anxiety.  I can't get ahead because it's not just me here.  I really don't like myself when I start telling her to stop and just leave things where they are.  I feel that's not fair to her, but there is no organization.  Well, not much.  So, I feel I can't expect her to put things back when she's done  I do, but it feels unfair and who knows where she puts them?  Then, I start to worry that I'm ruining her by not teaching her to take care of her things.  I feel so very guilty about that.  Sigh.  Someday my brain will work properly for more than just a few minutes or hours!!!

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

Link to comment

A new phase of withdrawal for me?

 

When a wave comes it seems to erase all memory of having had a window!  You know you had one like you know what you read in a history textbook, but as far as you are aware the window never happened -- on an emotional level.  It's very discouraging.  I feel depressed when I feel myself going back into a wave.  Just remember that you will feel better and better as you go lower on the Wellbutrin.  There will come a day when a wave doesn't feel so bad.  It's just a blip.  I felt so upset when felt a wave coming on a few days ago, but it didn't get deep!!  I was so surprised.  It hasn't been bad yet.  I simply fluctuate throughout the day and feel pretty crummy in the middle of the night.  This is brand new!

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

Link to comment
23 minutes ago, Rosetta said:

I felt so upset when felt a wave coming on a few days ago, but it didn't get deep!!

This sounds like you are making great strides in your recovery with the waves getting lighter.....someday there will be no more waves, just a wide open window.  Thinking about you - WR.

-1/06 - 3/07 Cymbalta. Fast taper (essentially CT); withdrawal symptoms after 4 mos (didn't realize was WD)

-10/07: 100 mg Zoloft; 1 mg Klonopin - tapered off Klonopin after 4 mos. Several unsuccessful slow tapers of Zoloft; went up and down in dose a lot

-Spring 2013 back on 1 mg Klonopin to counter WD symptoms; switched over 5-6 mos from Zoloft to 35 mg citalopram
-Two attempts at slow tapering citalopram, always increased dose due to WD; also increased Klonopin to 1.25 mg in 2014, then to 1.5 mg in 2015

-8/17-9/17: After holding one year at 20 mg, feeling withdrawal symptoms due to stress - slowly increased to 25 mg. No change in symptoms after 6 months (? tolerance ?)  - decided to start citalopram taper February 2018 (still on Klonopin 1.5 mg).

Supplements: fish oil; magnesium; vitamin D3; curcumin

Citalopram taper:  2/2018 - 12/2019: 25 mg - 11.03 mg I 2020: 10.89 mg - 7.9 mg I 2021: 7.8 mg - 5.26 mg I 2022: 5.2 mg - 3.36 mg I 2023: 3.3 mg - 1.47 mg 2024: 1/5/24: 1.44 mg; 1/19/24: 1.40 mg; 1/26/24: 1.37 mg; 2/2/24: 1.34 mg; 2/9/24: 1.31 mg; 2/23/24: 1.28 mg; 3/1/24: 1.25 mg; 3/8/24: 1.22 mg; 3/15/24: 1.19 mg

 

 

Link to comment
On 1/15/2018 at 10:42 AM, Rosetta said:

Hi Kesh,

 

Its so nice that you visited my thread.  Thank you.

 

Did the cortisol spike CAUSE the Akathisia -- set it in motion?  It certainly could.  For us in WD it seems that any release of a hormone or a neurotransmitter can result in a sequence of signals and the eventual improper release of cortisol or adrenaline or glutamate.  Theoretically, in "virgin" brains, anxiety and Akathisia may be caused by different mechanisms or neurotransmitters or hormones but for us, we are dealing with brains and CN systems that don't operate properly.  As I understand it, GABA is supposed to be managing the results of adrenaline spikes and cortisol releases, but in our systems there isn't a balance that keeps us level.  There isn't enough GABA or there isn't an ability to process the GABA.  Without GABA's calming effect neither the effects of cortisol or adrenaline or glutamate are being smoothed out.  So, anxiety and physical Akathisia and "Akathisia of the mind" -- whatever that is; it's certainly different and more horrible than even "intense" anxiety, imo -- are running unchecked and rampant.  

 

My cortisol spikes were awful, awful, awful!  I would wake up with a huge shot of adrenaline to my heart.  I suspect yours are different?  Instead of head zaps I had these shots of adrenaline.  It wasn't an electrical zap.  However, it was physical almost as if I was on a movie set in an ER after having a heart attack.  You know in the movies when the doctor uses a syringe of adrenaline as a last resort to start the heart?  Just like that.  At some point, I read about hypnic jerks when falling asleep.  Perhaps this was something like those, but I don't recall what I read causes the hypnic jerks.  Whatever it was, I came to the point that I dreaded nightfall although at nightfall I felt less anxious.  I dreaded it because of the fact that morning would come with cortisol spikes.

 

I made a mistake: I started jogging in the morning to reduce the anxiety caused by the cortisol "spike," I got relief from the cortisol - temporarily.  Akathisia would come on after the initial relief from the the morning cortisol spike WITHOUT that feeling of a shot to the heart.  Therefore, Akathisia and cortisol spikes were separate occurrences for me until I stopped jogging.  Then, the cortisol spike was being followed by the Akathisia.  Ultimately, I read that intense exercise raises cortisol and the light went on.  I suspect that I got endorphins or endocanabinoids from jogging, and those calmed me until the increase in cortisol set off the cascade that led to Akathisia.  Cortisol set off the system that uses glutamate or maybe the altering system that uses adrenaline.  Where is the line between anxiety and Akathisia of the mind?  I don't know.  It seems to me to be a continuum at least for those of us in WD.

 

My best,

Rosetta

 I just recently I just recently had a window that ended with a lot of exercise and drinking caffeine and started the wave so I think that this theory about too much exercise is right it causes withdrawals to start happening again

March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days

UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia.

August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only.

Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning

May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/

Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose

Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2  ativan 1mg a month as needed if that.

Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin

Link to comment

 I think I think that too much exercise and caffeine I'm mixed with exercise cause me to go back into a wave in my withdrawal process so I think that there is a limit of how much you can do physically and different types of allergies to food or caffeine

March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days

UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia.

August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only.

Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning

May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/

Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose

Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2  ativan 1mg a month as needed if that.

Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus
6 hours ago, Rosetta said:

When a wave comes it seems to erase all memory of having had a window!  You know you had one like you know what you read in a history textbook, but as far as you are aware the window never happened -- on an emotional level.  It's very discouraging.  

 

This is because the brain doesn't understand anything but the present.  Whatever it is feeling right now feels permanent.  Sometimes it helps to remind myself of that - it's a quirk of the brain.

 

6 hours ago, Rosetta said:

This is a frequent feeling -- her activity in pulling things out from where ever they are stuffed causes me a lot of anxiety.  I can't get ahead because it's not just me here.  I really don't like myself when I start telling her to stop and just leave things where they are.  I feel that's not fair to her, but there is no organization.  Well, not much.  So, I feel I can't expect her to put things back when she's done  I do, but it feels unfair and who knows where she puts them?  Then, I start to worry that I'm ruining her by not teaching her to take care of her things.  I feel so very guilty about that.  

 

Rosetta, I've been reading a great book called "A Perfect Mess" by Eric Abrahamson and David H Freedman: "The hidden benefits of disorder - how crammed closets, cluttered offices, and on-the-fly planning make the world a better place".  Excerpt from the back cover: "Do you shun disorder?  Or feel guilty about your own messiness?  Don't!  Whether it's your company's management plan or your hallway closet that bedevils you, this book will show you why you should say yes to mess".  From page 5: "When people are anxious about their messy homes and offices or their disorganized schedules, it's often not because the messiness and disorder are causing problems, but because people simply assume they should be neater and more organized and feel bad that they aren't". 

 

Reading this book has made me feel so much better about all the mess and disorder at my place.  We need to let go of all the guilt and worry.  I'm sure you are not ruining your daughter.  Maybe it's okay to let her be a happy, messy kid.  ( My kids are messy too - I think it's normal).

 

 

2001–2002 paroxetine

2003  citalopram

2004-2008  paroxetine (various failed tapers) 
2008  paroxetine slow taper down to

2016  Aug off paroxetine
2016  citalopram May 20mg  Oct 15mg … slow taper down
2018  citalopram 13 Feb 4.6mg 15 Mar 4.4mg 29 Apr 4.2mg 6 Jul 4.1mg 17 Aug 4.0mg  18 Nov 3.8mg
2019  15 Mar 3.6mg  21 May 3.4mg  26 Dec 3.2mg 

2020  19 Feb 3.0mg 19 Jul 2.9mg 16 Sep 2.8mg 25 Oct 2.7mg 23 Oct 2.6mg 24 Dec 2.5mg

2021   29 Aug 2.4mg   15 Nov 2.3mg

Link to comment

Thank you, Songbird, for your sweet comment.  I've heard that theory, too.  I'm not sure what I think, but I know what I feel, and I feel better when things are only slightly messy.  So does my husband, but as to whether it matters for my daughter, I hope you are right.  It's important that I feel better.  So, I'm glad I'm having a lot of healing!!!  Maybe I'll find a balance of messy/organized one day soon!!!

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus
16 hours ago, Rosetta said:

I feel better when things are only slightly messy.  So does my husband, but as to whether it matters for my daughter, I hope you are right.  It's important that I feel better.  So, I'm glad I'm having a lot of healing!!!  Maybe I'll find a balance of messy/organized one day soon!!!

 

I feel better when things are reasonably tidy, too.  I guess the point is to not beat ourselves up or feel guilty or anxious when things do get a bit too messy for us.  Let it all be okay.

2001–2002 paroxetine

2003  citalopram

2004-2008  paroxetine (various failed tapers) 
2008  paroxetine slow taper down to

2016  Aug off paroxetine
2016  citalopram May 20mg  Oct 15mg … slow taper down
2018  citalopram 13 Feb 4.6mg 15 Mar 4.4mg 29 Apr 4.2mg 6 Jul 4.1mg 17 Aug 4.0mg  18 Nov 3.8mg
2019  15 Mar 3.6mg  21 May 3.4mg  26 Dec 3.2mg 

2020  19 Feb 3.0mg 19 Jul 2.9mg 16 Sep 2.8mg 25 Oct 2.7mg 23 Oct 2.6mg 24 Dec 2.5mg

2021   29 Aug 2.4mg   15 Nov 2.3mg

Link to comment

 SO exciting Rosetta....the 'new' you are having is beautiful!!!  It seems many of your clearest windows have been in your memories and thoughts of all you are experiencing and feeling...its lovely!!  Happy for you!!! 💜

-Nardil 1976 < year, stopped. React to AD's. Klonopin .5BID 1990, 2.5mg til 2016

-Klonopin doubled Jan '16. Taper to 2.25mg May to Nov '16. Bad react to Lexapro, stop. React to Prevacid too, taper off. 

-November '16 Tapered .25mg Klonopin in hospital. Jan '17 started Viibryd, 20mg from Feb to June '17,     

-20mg to 10mg Viibryd from 3/25 to 6/10 2017, 12/15 10% Viibryd taper...back up next day

-Clonazepam 2mg to 1.85mg 4/14 '17 to end November; taper to 1mg Clonazepam in hospital 9/1 tp 9/14 '17

-Feb '18 Amiloride .25mg  5/18 off Amiloride d/t react. Clonaz compounded  

-4/27 '18 Viibryd 9.5mg, 6/11 9.0 mg, 1/27 '19 Viibryd 8.75mg, ; Clonazepam .2mg 530pm and .7mg 1130pm, Premarin .3mg 830PM CARAFATE QID 2/27/19 to 3/5/19

-July 6'19 1/2 10mg Claritin 230pm, stopped it about July 18, started Oct 11 '19, 

-7/27 Viibryd 8.5, 8/29 8.25, 10/24 8.0, 12/19 7.75, Feb '20 7.50, 3/20 7.25, 5/20 7.0, 6/20 6.75, 7/20 6.5, 8/20 6.25, 10/2 20 6.0, 11/25'20 5.75, 1/9/21 5.5, 2/23 5.25

-1015 AM Viibryd, vit D 4,000IU 130, 415 Clonazepam .2mg, 815 Premarin .3mg, 1015 Clonaz .7mg,

  1115 3t fish oil+D 1145 Castor Oil 650mg(4) 1230 Carafate 1/2GM,Methylated B Vit  1/week,Reacted Mag prn

Link to comment

Thank you everyone.  I wrote a long post with all of you tagged, but I lost it.  It wouldn't post and then disappeared.  That's been happening lately.

 

@Rabe @wantrelief @FarmGirlWorks @mirage @jonnypeters1234567  @neroli @EdinburghGuy @DMV64 @RealMe @LexAnger @Carmie @Waterfall @Hazel @Cheeky @DaveB

@Dalalea @Kristine

Songbird, Brassmonkey, Alto, JanCarol, SkyBlue, Bubbles

 

Last night, I laughed until I cried!!!!  This such HUGE, huge news!

 

I was reading a book to my daughter, and there was a part that was quite funny.  I started laughing and laughing and then tears came to my eyes.  It wasn't a weird, out of proportion, manic kind of event.  At least I don't think so.  The book was a chapter book for third graders, probably, and was written to make one laugh.  The part of the book keep building on itself.  It was sort of a suspenseful funny part.  A little girl who is a witch cannot control her magic.  She turned into a skunk in the cafeteria on her first day of school and she was trying to control her actions, but people kept doing more things to scare her and make her mad.  Then she became the size of an elephant, but she was still a skunk.  You know where this is going.

 

The amazing part is that I had a strong, POSITIVE emotion!!!  It might be the first time this has happened in over a year!!!

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

Link to comment
  • Mentor

This is such GREAT NEWS!!! Wow... congrats!

  • Prozac | late 2004-mid-2005 | CT WD in a couple months, mostly emotional
  • Sertraline 50-100mg | 11/2011-3/2014, 10/2014-3/2017
  • Sertraline fast taper March 2017, 4 weeks, OFF sertraline April 1, 2017
  • Quit alcohol May 20, 2017
  • Lifestyle changes: AA, kundalini yoga

 

"If you've seen a monster, even if it's horrible, that's evidence of divinity." – Damien Echols

 

Link to comment
5 hours ago, Rosetta said:

The amazing part is that I had a strong, POSITIVE emotion!!!  It might be the first time this has happened in over a year!!!

Fantastic, Rosetta.  Great news for you and really uplifting for us.  Hoping you get more of these positive events .

 

neroli x

2006 Citalopram 20mg on and off to 2013.  April 2013 - July 2014  Sertraline, Venlafaxine, Fluoxetine, Mirtazapine v. bad reactions. July 2014 - CT Mirtazapine.  July 2014 - February 2016 Medication free, long term w/d.  February - July 2016 Fluoxetine.  Medication free, long term w/d syndrome.  2017 Jan physical breakdown.

2017 February - March Escitalopram, Nortriptyline instated.  Lorazepam, Zopiclone PRN.  April 2017 Lithium Carbonate 250mg 1 wk. 14 August 2017 finish cross to Diazepam 22.5mg daily, stop Zopiclone

Tapers:

Diazepam 

2017 21 August - 30 Dec 21.25mg to 14.5mg 2018 6 Jan - 11 May to 12mg.  2 June updose to 12.25mg - hold. 2019 (0.5mg cuts) 12 Jan - 28 Dec 12mg to 10mg 2020 (0.25mg cuts) - 25 Jan - 29 Dec 9.75mg to 6.25mg 2021 *May have bungled dose and accidentally took 1mg more for about a month (7.25mg), so 4 Jan started again at 6.5mg; 19 Jan 6.25mg; 1 Feb 6.0mg; 23 Feb 5.75mg; 9 Mar 5.5mg; 23 Mar 5.25mg; 9 Apr 5.0mg; 6 May 4.75mg; 13 May 4.5mg; 6 Jun 4mg; 12 July 3.5mg; 2 sep 3.0mg; 15 Sep 2.5mg; 1 Nov 2mg; 15 Nov 1.5mg; 16 Dec 1mg; 26 Dec 0.5mg; 2022 1 Jan - OFF

Escitalopram - 2022 1 Mar to 9mg; 29 Mar 8mg; 24 May 7mg; 21 Jun 5mg; 19 Jul 4mg; 1 Sep 3mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 31 Oct 1.5mg; 22 Nov 0.5mg; 2023 1 Jan 0.25mg; 1 Mar OFF

Nortriptyline  2018 90mg to 2020 1 Dec down to 72.5mg; 2021 20 May 70mg; 8 Jun 67.5mg; 24 Jun 65mg; 31 July 60mg; 12 Oct 55mg; 23 Oct 50mg; 2022 13 Jan 40mg; 22 Jan 30mg; 29 Mar 20mg; 26 Apr 10mg; 3 Aug 5mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 2023 1 Jan - OFF

 

1 March 2023 - off all drugs - 6-year taper off three drugs.

 

Link to comment

@Rosetta This is fabulous! Your reaction of laughing until you cried is what I call, being tickled. For some reason there can be things that just get your laughing and the more you laugh, the funnier it all becomes. It is a great feeling. A very normal feeling. Not manic! Everybody has those moments and they are supposed to happen. Also, sounds like a really cute book. I remember reading to my kids. They are all grown now so it is heartfelt to hear this. 

 

How have you been feeling? I have been thinking about you lately. Keeping you in my prayers. 

 

Hugs

Started Wellbutrin 300xl mid July, 2009. Stopped Wellbutrin 300xl cold turkey May 8, 2017

Started having symptoms started June 2, 2017. Started Wellbutrin 150xl July 7, 2017

Started Remeron 15mg August 15, 2017. Increased Remeron to 30mg October 4, 2017

Increased Wellbutrin to 300xl November 24, 2017. Lowered Wellbutrin 300xl back to 150xl January 8, 2018

Started weaning off of Remeron 30mg. Cut to 22.25mg January 11, 2018

Cut Remeron to 15mg January 18, 2018 Cut Remeron to 7.5mg January 25, 2018

Cut Remeron to 3.5mg January 30,2018. Stopped taking Remeron February 1, 2018

Currently taking: Fish Oil, Magnesium, Calcium, Vit D, Progesterone,

Hormone Replacement Pellets-Estrogen Testosterone 

Link to comment
  • Moderator

What's the name of the story, I would like to read it.

20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013.

Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks.  The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better.

Final Dose 0.016mg.     Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017

 

"It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general."  Stephen Hawking

Link to comment

Oh Rosetta! I'm so happy for you! That's just wonderful! 

Hopefully you get to see many more such moments!

 

 

Anxiety since I was 5, and my Grandma died.  Depression since at least my early 20s. 

Wellbutrin for unknown length of time in 2009  Guess: 6-9 months.  Cold Turkeyed in Dec 2009. 

Citalopram 40mg end of 2014 until June 2017. Began within a few months after 4th child was born because I crashed. 

Quit CT.  Had no major symptoms until Sept. Took Gaba from spring until near end of Nov 2017

Took St. John's Wort mixed with who knows what else from mid-summer to end of Sept.. 

Clonazepam 0.25 mg once a day since Sept. 18.  To stay sane. 

Rough time since Sept. 18.  Tried to reinstate.  Repeatedly.  Failed.  Bad reaction.  Horrible cortisol spikes

I seem to react badly to anything I take right now.  Except Clonazepam.    

End of December, forgot to take Clonazepam for a few days. Thought I could do without. 

Appears I was wrong,  Jan. 1-2?   Trying to find the right way to deal with things.

Holding at 1/4 of 0.25mg pill morning and night.  Reinstated Jan. 5

Apr. 30, Got a scale.  Measuring roughly .25 mg of a .80mg pill that contains .25mg Clonazepam.  

Link to comment

It's  nice to know that other people are getting better also . I'm happy for you that you had that moment. It seems that our recovery shows itself in many different ways. I noticed that during my windows  I start thinking about all the things I haven't been doing or of missed out on which is I \can tell is my normal thinking.

March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days

UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia.

August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only.

Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning

May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/

Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose

Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2  ativan 1mg a month as needed if that.

Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin

Link to comment

That is a great moment when we're sharing it with our family. Sometimes it's frustrating to me because I want to go over and visit my family but I'm so self-absorbed in this I just stay focused on my routine. When I do see them I try to be in the moment

March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days

UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia.

August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only.

Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning

May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/

Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose

Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2  ativan 1mg a month as needed if that.

Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin

Link to comment

So happy to see this Rosetta!! Hope many more laughs are around the corner 

Aug-Dec 2015 Prozac 20mg / Dec 2015-Feb 2016 Prozac 15mg / Feb 2016-May2016 Prozac 20mg

May 2016-June 2016 15mg

June 2016-August 2016 10mg

October 2016-January 2017 15mg, alternating agitation/akathisia sets in --> cold turkey

January 2017 Clonazepam .5mg 

February 2017 Clonazepam 1mg (for a week) then .5mg morning and .25mg evening for about a month. Came down to .25mg morning and evening. 

May 1, 2017 Clonazepam .25mg morning and .125mg evening. // May 20, 2017 Clonazepam .25mg morning and .0625 evening (.3125 total).

early June .28125 // early mid june .25mg // mid june .21875 // late june .1875 // early july .15625 // early mid july .125 

mid july .09375mg // late july .0625 //early August 2017 down to .03125mg once a day, hopped off in mid August

reinstated at .0625mg late August // Oct 16 - updose to .07mg and switch to oral Rosemont solution

Nov 17 2017 reinstate Prozac .5mg // Nov 21 2017 prozac 1.6mg // Dec 18 2017  3mg prozac / fast taper off the reinstatement -- probably completely off early Oct 2018

June 2019 begin tapering off .07mg Clonazepam, Finish taper December 2019

Link to comment

Journal:

 

Today is Wednesday, the 18th of July.  On Sunday, I was dehydrated and I got a bad headache on my right side -- the dystonia side.  My temple, eye, cheek, jaw, neck and shoulder hurt and felt very tense most of the day and all night long.  In the morning, Monday, there was still some discomfort.  It went away as the day progressed.  I went for a long walk that day. Monday night was the night I laughed with my daughter until I cried while we were reading a book.  That night, my nightly insomnia was slightly anxious.  

 

Tuesday, I went for another long walk.  My best friend from high school asked me to do something that would require traveling, seeing my mother, etc -- I had to leave a car at her house back when my grandfather's house was still under my power.  She needs me to move it, but there are things in it I want to keep.  So, last night, I was very anxious during the insomnia.  I'm going to talk to her now about how I can handle this problem.  I hope she can understand or that I can do what she needs me to do.  

 

Last night, I ordered some school clothes for my daughter online.  This morning, I organized some laundry, did an inventory of her school clothes and sorted out some of my daughter's old clothes.  THIS is quite an achievement.  Today, I took a walk that was a bit shorter.  The dystonia came back after the walk.  I can't write much right now.  It's still there.  It's not painful, but quite uncomfortable.  I have been sleepy today.  And sad and somewhat anxious. 

 

I've been emotional these past three days.  It's a roller coaster, but a milder one than I used to have.  I have been avoiding the news as much as possible for 4 days.  I think that helps.  Today, I read some headlines.  They didn't upset me, but I tried to watch a show -- Sci-fI.  It upset me.  I guess I'm going to have to avoid the show.  I'm bored and that makes me anxious.  

 

I'm noticing a lot of physical issues that I have had for years are easing or resolving -- sensitivity to light, sensitivity to wind on my skin, and there is a general feeling of my body returning to a more normal state.  There are many of these Physical feelings that I thought were just me.  I didn't know the AD (or perhaps it was withdrawal for years) was causing me to be so sensitive to stimulus.  It very eye-opening. My husband is noticing, as well.

 

At the moment, I'm on the verge of tears.  I feel a sense of grief as if I lost someone.

 

Brassmonkey, the book is called Upside Down Magic.  It's a series.  We were reading the first book.  It has a picture of a kitten on the cover, and the kitten has bat wings.  It's $ 3.99 on Kindle or Amazon.  Not sure which.

 

Thanks for all your comments, everyone, @Waterfall @bheb @RusTW @mirage @neroli @FarmGirlWorks

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

Link to comment

@Rosetta While you are having some trials and tribulations, it sounds like you are doing better and moving in the right direction. That is good news. 

 

I am sorry to hear about your dilemma with your girlfriend and very sorry you are feeling a sense of grief. I am here to support you and i'm sending big hugs to you. 

 

You are strong and you are healing. God bless you dear friend. 

Started Wellbutrin 300xl mid July, 2009. Stopped Wellbutrin 300xl cold turkey May 8, 2017

Started having symptoms started June 2, 2017. Started Wellbutrin 150xl July 7, 2017

Started Remeron 15mg August 15, 2017. Increased Remeron to 30mg October 4, 2017

Increased Wellbutrin to 300xl November 24, 2017. Lowered Wellbutrin 300xl back to 150xl January 8, 2018

Started weaning off of Remeron 30mg. Cut to 22.25mg January 11, 2018

Cut Remeron to 15mg January 18, 2018 Cut Remeron to 7.5mg January 25, 2018

Cut Remeron to 3.5mg January 30,2018. Stopped taking Remeron February 1, 2018

Currently taking: Fish Oil, Magnesium, Calcium, Vit D, Progesterone,

Hormone Replacement Pellets-Estrogen Testosterone 

Link to comment

I spoke to her and she doesn't need me to do anything!! Whew!  She was just trying to help, and it can wait as long as I need.

 

However, her 12 year old son is on ADHD meds and Lexapro for anxiety that was probably caused by ADHD Concerta meds.  He's a highly functioning autistic kid.  I worry for his future and hers.

 

Thanks, @mirage.  I don't have to worry now that I have to travel!!!

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

Link to comment

So happy to hear about the car working our Rosetta, and about your sorting though things and doing laundry...tidying.  That IS a huge step for you!  Gosh I feel so happy for and proud of you..such a big step!!  Thinking the feelings are ok, given all the feelings you expressed when talking about what surrounded the inability to deal with the 'stuff'.  Better to have the feelings coming out than staying in there hiding but none the less affecting.  Take care!!  HUGS!!!💜 

-Nardil 1976 < year, stopped. React to AD's. Klonopin .5BID 1990, 2.5mg til 2016

-Klonopin doubled Jan '16. Taper to 2.25mg May to Nov '16. Bad react to Lexapro, stop. React to Prevacid too, taper off. 

-November '16 Tapered .25mg Klonopin in hospital. Jan '17 started Viibryd, 20mg from Feb to June '17,     

-20mg to 10mg Viibryd from 3/25 to 6/10 2017, 12/15 10% Viibryd taper...back up next day

-Clonazepam 2mg to 1.85mg 4/14 '17 to end November; taper to 1mg Clonazepam in hospital 9/1 tp 9/14 '17

-Feb '18 Amiloride .25mg  5/18 off Amiloride d/t react. Clonaz compounded  

-4/27 '18 Viibryd 9.5mg, 6/11 9.0 mg, 1/27 '19 Viibryd 8.75mg, ; Clonazepam .2mg 530pm and .7mg 1130pm, Premarin .3mg 830PM CARAFATE QID 2/27/19 to 3/5/19

-July 6'19 1/2 10mg Claritin 230pm, stopped it about July 18, started Oct 11 '19, 

-7/27 Viibryd 8.5, 8/29 8.25, 10/24 8.0, 12/19 7.75, Feb '20 7.50, 3/20 7.25, 5/20 7.0, 6/20 6.75, 7/20 6.5, 8/20 6.25, 10/2 20 6.0, 11/25'20 5.75, 1/9/21 5.5, 2/23 5.25

-1015 AM Viibryd, vit D 4,000IU 130, 415 Clonazepam .2mg, 815 Premarin .3mg, 1015 Clonaz .7mg,

  1115 3t fish oil+D 1145 Castor Oil 650mg(4) 1230 Carafate 1/2GM,Methylated B Vit  1/week,Reacted Mag prn

Link to comment

@Rosetta Glad it all worked out for you. It is hard dealing with the weird fake anxiety. I have never had it before this journey and now, even the simplest of things causes it to heighten. 

 

I can understand your worry about your friends son. Please don't take that worry on. He may do just great and it would be worry for nothing. Focus on your continued healing. 

 

I have a dental appt today. Before this journey I wouldn't have given a single thought to it. Today, I have that butterflies in your stomach feeling. However, that is not bad. About 6 months ago, my heart would be pounding out of my chest. This is the last appt on a long journey. Long story, short, I had a dentist break the drill off in my tooth while doing a root canal and she left it there and never told me. I was really sick for a while with a fever, nausea, sinus pain and swelling. I kept seeing me dr and was getting treated for a sinus infection that we thought wasn't clearing. My dentist finally called me and confessed. This was all before I stopped the med. Fast forward to December 2017. I had to have the tooth removed and a lot of bone grafting done because I had so much jaw deterioration from the infection. In May, 2018, I had the second surgery to put the post in for the implant. Today, is the final day. I get the tooth put on and I am done! Both surgeries were done during this battle of withdrawal. They both set me back hugely. The anesthetic they used to put me to sleep for both, were not good for the system not to mention having all of the work done in the jaw bone. Again, hard on the system. I didn't have a choice and had to have it done. I am ready for this to be behind me. I look back at those surgeries and I don't even know how I got through them, especially the Dec one. I was only 6 months into this med journey and I was SO sick! But, I made it! 

 

 I have to work after my dental appt today so I have a challenging day ahead of me. I've got this. I can do it. 

 

Prayers and hugs!

 

 

Started Wellbutrin 300xl mid July, 2009. Stopped Wellbutrin 300xl cold turkey May 8, 2017

Started having symptoms started June 2, 2017. Started Wellbutrin 150xl July 7, 2017

Started Remeron 15mg August 15, 2017. Increased Remeron to 30mg October 4, 2017

Increased Wellbutrin to 300xl November 24, 2017. Lowered Wellbutrin 300xl back to 150xl January 8, 2018

Started weaning off of Remeron 30mg. Cut to 22.25mg January 11, 2018

Cut Remeron to 15mg January 18, 2018 Cut Remeron to 7.5mg January 25, 2018

Cut Remeron to 3.5mg January 30,2018. Stopped taking Remeron February 1, 2018

Currently taking: Fish Oil, Magnesium, Calcium, Vit D, Progesterone,

Hormone Replacement Pellets-Estrogen Testosterone 

Link to comment

@RabeHow are you doing? Praying you are making progress. 

 

Hugs!

Started Wellbutrin 300xl mid July, 2009. Stopped Wellbutrin 300xl cold turkey May 8, 2017

Started having symptoms started June 2, 2017. Started Wellbutrin 150xl July 7, 2017

Started Remeron 15mg August 15, 2017. Increased Remeron to 30mg October 4, 2017

Increased Wellbutrin to 300xl November 24, 2017. Lowered Wellbutrin 300xl back to 150xl January 8, 2018

Started weaning off of Remeron 30mg. Cut to 22.25mg January 11, 2018

Cut Remeron to 15mg January 18, 2018 Cut Remeron to 7.5mg January 25, 2018

Cut Remeron to 3.5mg January 30,2018. Stopped taking Remeron February 1, 2018

Currently taking: Fish Oil, Magnesium, Calcium, Vit D, Progesterone,

Hormone Replacement Pellets-Estrogen Testosterone 

Link to comment

Rosetta how goes it today?☺

March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days

UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia.

August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only.

Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning

May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/

Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose

Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2  ativan 1mg a month as needed if that.

Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin

Link to comment

Hi Rosetta - Thanks for stopping by my thread.  I am thinking about you!

-1/06 - 3/07 Cymbalta. Fast taper (essentially CT); withdrawal symptoms after 4 mos (didn't realize was WD)

-10/07: 100 mg Zoloft; 1 mg Klonopin - tapered off Klonopin after 4 mos. Several unsuccessful slow tapers of Zoloft; went up and down in dose a lot

-Spring 2013 back on 1 mg Klonopin to counter WD symptoms; switched over 5-6 mos from Zoloft to 35 mg citalopram
-Two attempts at slow tapering citalopram, always increased dose due to WD; also increased Klonopin to 1.25 mg in 2014, then to 1.5 mg in 2015

-8/17-9/17: After holding one year at 20 mg, feeling withdrawal symptoms due to stress - slowly increased to 25 mg. No change in symptoms after 6 months (? tolerance ?)  - decided to start citalopram taper February 2018 (still on Klonopin 1.5 mg).

Supplements: fish oil; magnesium; vitamin D3; curcumin

Citalopram taper:  2/2018 - 12/2019: 25 mg - 11.03 mg I 2020: 10.89 mg - 7.9 mg I 2021: 7.8 mg - 5.26 mg I 2022: 5.2 mg - 3.36 mg I 2023: 3.3 mg - 1.47 mg 2024: 1/5/24: 1.44 mg; 1/19/24: 1.40 mg; 1/26/24: 1.37 mg; 2/2/24: 1.34 mg; 2/9/24: 1.31 mg; 2/23/24: 1.28 mg; 3/1/24: 1.25 mg; 3/8/24: 1.22 mg; 3/15/24: 1.19 mg

 

 

Link to comment

Hi RusTW.  Thanks for asking.  

 

Physical issues:

Well, physical symptoms are very annoying, but mood is ok today.  I have been in the car everyday this week.  Riding in the car causes my face to tense and sort of burn across my cheeks and my jaw gets very tense.  By the end of the day, I have tension on the right side much like I get when I read and write.  Temple, eye, jaw neck and shoulder feel they are being twisted to the right.  My hip and foot feel strange, and I've been getting cramps in my toes on both feet.  It's a dystonia, I'm sure, but it's going to go away someday, I believe.  

 

Exercise/Mood:

MTWTh I went to drop my daughter at camp and then had breakfast and for a walk on the beach.  I didn't go home to rest before pick at camp for my daughter.  So, I've had a lot of sunshine/Vit D and plenty of exercise.  Too much time in the car and very little rest.  It's ok because I can't rest at home anyway.  As tired as I am, staying away from home has kept my mood from getting bad and staying that way.  

 

Appetite/Sleep/Emotions

My appetite's been good.  I've been having breakfast out and sometimes lunch, too.  Trying to get plenty of protein, but two days I didn't have enough to eat.  I woke in the night hungry and anxious.  I've had cortisol less frequently, but it still happens.  This morning, I woke up at 6:30 after getting to bed late -- for me -- 9:30.  I cried a little bit after I woke up.  I felt sad.  I missed my grandparents and their house.  I worried about something happening to my daughter or me dying and leaving her alone.  After I left the house, the cortisol wore off.  and I've been able to function ok.  The emotions scaled back.

 

Brain function:

Yesterday afternoon and last night, I felt maniac a bit.  I felt creative and as if I had to solve this problem at home regarding the family room/kitchen area.  It's a first world problem that is silly and unimportant compared to real problems.  I won't describe it in detail, but we want to be able to sit and eat with our child in the kitchen.  One person has to stand at the is

and because it has storage underneath it on one side.  Otherwise, we have to get rid of our couch and find a smaller one that fits all of us.  That's been difficult.  This kept me awake which would normally be absurd except that it's a WD related anxiety/recurring thought sort of thing.  It reminded me of how I felt on 150 mg of Zoloft, but it wasn't that bad.  It didn't scare me.  I knew it would stop.  

 

This morning, I did a little more organizing and sorting out clothes that don't fit my daughter.  Amazing!!!  After we got home from camp, I cleaned her tennis shoes that has been sitting outside gathering cobwebs for about 7-8 months. Really amazing!! They were a bit too big for her last fall and when she covered them in red mud, I left them out.  So, I'm definitely getting back to functional.  My brain is working sometimes rather well except that it goes off into a slight mania.  It's progress!!

 

Gut:

I missed my magnesium last night, and I had tummy/bathroom troubles this morning regardless!  It wasn't bad, but there are some changes happening in the gut it seems.

 

Still no Mother Nature!! The last time was April 2nd.  Three months.  I'm pretty sure that is why I have been feeling more or less ok and everything I has been improving.  I just hope that when it comes back I'll keep my gains and not have a hard time again.

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

Link to comment

It is always wonderful to read about your progress, Rosetta!

-1/06 - 3/07 Cymbalta. Fast taper (essentially CT); withdrawal symptoms after 4 mos (didn't realize was WD)

-10/07: 100 mg Zoloft; 1 mg Klonopin - tapered off Klonopin after 4 mos. Several unsuccessful slow tapers of Zoloft; went up and down in dose a lot

-Spring 2013 back on 1 mg Klonopin to counter WD symptoms; switched over 5-6 mos from Zoloft to 35 mg citalopram
-Two attempts at slow tapering citalopram, always increased dose due to WD; also increased Klonopin to 1.25 mg in 2014, then to 1.5 mg in 2015

-8/17-9/17: After holding one year at 20 mg, feeling withdrawal symptoms due to stress - slowly increased to 25 mg. No change in symptoms after 6 months (? tolerance ?)  - decided to start citalopram taper February 2018 (still on Klonopin 1.5 mg).

Supplements: fish oil; magnesium; vitamin D3; curcumin

Citalopram taper:  2/2018 - 12/2019: 25 mg - 11.03 mg I 2020: 10.89 mg - 7.9 mg I 2021: 7.8 mg - 5.26 mg I 2022: 5.2 mg - 3.36 mg I 2023: 3.3 mg - 1.47 mg 2024: 1/5/24: 1.44 mg; 1/19/24: 1.40 mg; 1/26/24: 1.37 mg; 2/2/24: 1.34 mg; 2/9/24: 1.31 mg; 2/23/24: 1.28 mg; 3/1/24: 1.25 mg; 3/8/24: 1.22 mg; 3/15/24: 1.19 mg

 

 

Link to comment

Hi Rosetta Thanks for sharing that.You seem like your moving right along.i do the same thing about avoiding going home.im better out moving around.if i try to relax at home i get symptoms probably from having the time to focus on the symptoms.i get anxious still about mortality that causes a little depression also.does magnesium help you.

March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days

UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia.

August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only.

Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning

May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/

Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose

Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2  ativan 1mg a month as needed if that.

Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin

Link to comment

I think magnesium helps. I can't point to any evidence in particular, but it is supposed to be calming, and it certainly doesn't hurt.  Too much will cause problems with diarrhea.  Even the dose on the package might be too much.  So, go slow.

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

Link to comment

SLEEP

These things worked for me:

 

Walking every day or almost everyday is the most important thing I do.

 

1. Go to bed early and use a sleep mask to block out the light.  Get black out shades for the window.  I use both.

2. No screens for an hour or two before bedtime.  No blue light.  Low, golden light or candles in the house.

3. Use a fan for white noise.

4. Go to bed at the same time every night

5. Drop the temperature in your bedroom before you go to bed (I have to drop mine to 73).  This will signal your body that it's time to sleep.

6. Soothing music - yoga, meditation or singing bowls music perhaps.

7.  Walking almost everyday

 

To sleep later:

8.  Use a sleep mask/black out shades to sleep later on days you don't work.

9. If --after daylight -- you wake up anxious and can't fall back asleep, get up and do something to distract so that you can get to bed earlier that night.

10. Turn down the thermostat if you had let the temp rise in the night.  

 

If you wake up in the night:

 

11. Drink warm milk.

12. Use a microwaveable shoulder wrap or neck wrap that you can heat.  I heat mine 2-3-4 times if necessary.

13. Don't watch tv or movies or read a kindle or use the Internet. No blue light.

14.  Try to avoid turning on the lights.

15.  Turn down the thermostat a couple of degrees.

16.  Turn on a fan or some type of white noise.

17. Observe your breath -- in, out, in, out (meditation)

18. Repeat a mantra -- I am safe.  I am safe.

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

Link to comment
50 minutes ago, Rosetta said:

SLEEP

These things worked for me:

 

Thanks for these really good tips, Rosetta!  

xo RM

Alcohol periodic excessive 1963-1976, Valium sporadic 1964-1973,  Imipramine off & on 1982-1985, Fluoxetine 10mg-80 mg. Oct., 1995-Jan., 2014; Cymbalta, other ADs 1/2014-3/2014; Abilify 5 mg. 3/2014 - 8/8/17; Trintellix 20 mg. 3/2014 - 9/2017; Propranolol 60-80 mg. sporadically Sept-Oct, 2017; Seroquel few days Sept 2017 (c/t); Wellbutrin 150 mg. Sept, 2017 updosed to 300 mg. few days till c/t Oct 8, 2017, fish oil, vitD, vitE Oct 16, 2017-pres. Lipoflavonoid 4/2017-pres.  Fluoxetine 10 mg. Sept-Oct 8, 2017, 20 mg. 10/9- 10/15; 10 mg. 10/16 - 12/29;  9 mg. 12/30 - 2/9; 2 mL liquid (8.1mg) 2/10 - 3/7; 1.8 mL (7.29 mg) 3/8 -3/20; 1.6 mL (6.561mg) 3/20-4/2; 1.4 mL (5.9 mg) 4/3-4/14; 1mL (4 mg.) 4/15-4/22; .9mL (3.6mg) 4/23-5/1; .81mL (3.24 mg) 5/2-5/24; .73mL (2.916mg.) 5/25-6/8; .65mL 6/9-6/23; .6mL 6/24-7/17; .58mL 7/18-7/28; .525mL 7/29-8/13; .5 mL 8/14-21; .45mL 8/22-31; .4mL 9/2-21; .35mL 9/22-10/4; .3mL 10/5-28; .25mL 10/28-11/10; .2mL 11/11-11/24; .18mL 11/25-12/3; .1mL 12/4-12/18. Zero-12/19/18-present.

Link to comment

Ok thanks.I'm gonna try it tonight.low dose. I'll try some of the other stuff you listed to thank you so much for that. My problem is that if I hear any noises I'll wake up immediately and then it's hard to get back asleep especially early in the morning. I can still feel the low dose of Seroquel working because I wake up super groggy when I do get woken up and I am able to fall back asleep but I'm worried as I start to taper down to zero. That insomnia will get worse. I'm still taking a low dose of Zoloft 50 mg in the daytime and I know that's an activating drug so I'm not sure if that's revving me up or if it's actually calming the anxiety I do feel activated after I take it for a short period of time like caffeine. What's your opinion on tapering Zoloft and Seroquel I have to taper off of both of these but I'm not sure which one to do first. I'm concerned if I taper off the Seroquel first because Zoloft is an activating drug it might heightened anxiety and insomnia

March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days

UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia.

August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only.

Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning

May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/

Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose

Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2  ativan 1mg a month as needed if that.

Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin

Link to comment

Please sign in to comment

You will be able to leave a comment after signing in



Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Terms of Use Privacy Policy