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Rosetta: cold switch May 2011 & too fast taper Feb 2017


Rosetta

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Hi RusTW.  Thanks for asking.  

 

Physical issues:

Well, physical symptoms are very annoying, but mood is ok today.  I have been in the car everyday this week.  Riding in the car causes my face to tense and sort of burn across my cheeks and my jaw gets very tense.  By the end of the day, I have tension on the right side much like I get when I read and write.  Temple, eye, jaw neck and shoulder feel they are being twisted to the right.  My hip and foot feel strange, and I've been getting cramps in my toes on both feet.  It's a dystonia, I'm sure, but it's going to go away someday, I believe.  

 

Exercise/Mood:

MTWTh I went to drop my daughter at camp and then had breakfast and for a walk on the beach.  I didn't go home to rest before pick at camp for my daughter.  So, I've had a lot of sunshine/Vit D and plenty of exercise.  Too much time in the car and very little rest.  It's ok because I can't rest at home anyway.  As tired as I am, staying away from home has kept my mood from getting bad and staying that way.  

 

Appetite/Sleep/Emotions

My appetite's been good.  I've been having breakfast out and sometimes lunch, too.  Trying to get plenty of protein, but two days I didn't have enough to eat.  I woke in the night hungry and anxious.  I've had cortisol less frequently, but it still happens.  This morning, I woke up at 6:30 after getting to bed late -- for me -- 9:30.  I cried a little bit after I woke up.  I felt sad.  I missed my grandparents and their house.  I worried about something happening to my daughter or me dying and leaving her alone.  After I left the house, the cortisol wore off.  and I've been able to function ok.  The emotions scaled back.

 

Brain function:

Yesterday afternoon and last night, I felt maniac a bit.  I felt creative and as if I had to solve this problem at home regarding the family room/kitchen area.  It's a first world problem that is silly and unimportant compared to real problems.  I won't describe it in detail, but we want to be able to sit and eat with our child in the kitchen.  One person has to stand at the is

and because it has storage underneath it on one side.  Otherwise, we have to get rid of our couch and find a smaller one that fits all of us.  That's been difficult.  This kept me awake which would normally be absurd except that it's a WD related anxiety/recurring thought sort of thing.  It reminded me of how I felt on 150 mg of Zoloft, but it wasn't that bad.  It didn't scare me.  I knew it would stop.  

 

This morning, I did a little more organizing and sorting out clothes that don't fit my daughter.  Amazing!!!  After we got home from camp, I cleaned her tennis shoes that has been sitting outside gathering cobwebs for about 7-8 months. Really amazing!! They were a bit too big for her last fall and when she covered them in red mud, I left them out.  So, I'm definitely getting back to functional.  My brain is working sometimes rather well except that it goes off into a slight mania.  It's progress!!

 

Gut:

I missed my magnesium last night, and I had tummy/bathroom troubles this morning regardless!  It wasn't bad, but there are some changes happening in the gut it seems.

 

Still no Mother Nature!! The last time was April 2nd.  Three months.  I'm pretty sure that is why I have been feeling more or less ok and everything I has been improving.  I just hope that when it comes back I'll keep my gains and not have a hard time again.

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

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Thanks, @Sheera.  Thank you, @bubbles.   I forgot to note that something physical has changed, and it’s a big deal.  Last Fall, in August, I tried to wear contact lenses again.  I had given

@Amira123 Oh, yes, all of that!  It all slowly lessened over time.  There were windows when I felt relief from those symptoms.  Then, they would come back and go away again.  At times, I had bad waves

I wrote something similar to this to another member, and I thought I would post it here before I sign off:   It WILL get better.  I am SO MUCH better!  Sometimes I think I should pinch mysel

It is always wonderful to read about your progress, Rosetta!

-1/06 - 3/07 Cymbalta. Fast taper; withdrawal symptoms after 4 mos (didn't realize was WD)

-10/07: 100 mg Zoloft; 1 mg Klonopin - tapered off Klonopin
-Tried several times to slowly taper Zoloft by 10%, then 5% every 4-6 weeks; could never get below approx. 40 mg - spring 2012 experienced major WD symptoms due to stress; tried to updose but no relief, back on Klonopin 1 mg.
-Switched over 5-6 mos from Zoloft to Citalopram. Finished Zoloft 1/13; Citalopram 35 mg and 1 mg Klonopin.
-8/13: 27 mg Citalopram; 1 mg Klonopin

-11/14: 12.6 Citalopram - began to have bad withdrawal symptoms; out of desperation increased to 1.25 mg Klonopin at the beginning of December.  12/13/14 16 mg Citalopram - going to stay here to try to stabilize; stabilized on 16 mg Citalopram after 4-5 months

-7/15 - 3/16: reduced to 15 mg; ~ 2 months later w/d hit hard (probably r/t stress); 6/16 updosed to 20 mg Citalopram and trying to stabilize. Updosed to 1.5 Klonopin as well. Stabilized on 20 mg Citalopram after 4-5 months

8/17-9/17: feeling withdrawal symptoms at 20 mg Citalopram (due to stress) - slowly increased to 25 mg. No change in symptoms after 6 months (? tolerance ?)  - decided to start citalopram taper February 2018 (still on Klonopin 1.5 mg).

Supplements: fish oil; vitamin D3; curcumin

Citalopram taper:  2/2018 - 12/2019: 25 mg - 11.03 mg

2020: 1/14/20: 10.89 mg (1.27% drop); 1/22/20: 10.75 mg (1.29% drop); 2/28/20 toe surgery; 4/26/20: 10.62 mg (1.21% drop); 5/3/20: 10.5 mg (1.22% drop); 5/10/20: 10.4 mg (1.24% drop); 5/17/20: 10.2 mg (1.25% drop); 6/7/20: 10.10 mg (1.27% drop); 6/14/20: 9.98 mg (1.19% drop); 6/21/20: 9.85 mg (1.30% drop); 6/28/20: 9.7 mg (1.22% drop); 7/12/20: 9.6 mg (1.23% drop); 7/19/20: 9.5 mg (1.25% drop); 7/26/20: 9.4 mg (1.26% drop); 8/2/20: 9.3 mg (1.28% drop); 8/17/20: 9.14 mg (1.19% drop); 8/31/20: 9.0 mg (1.31% drop); 9/6/20: 8.9 mg (1.22% drop); 9/27/20: 8.8 mg (1.23% drop); 10/4/20: 8.7 mg (1.25% drop); 10/11/20: 8.6 mg (1.27% drop); 10/18/20: 8.5 mg (1.28% drop); 11/8/20: 8.4 mg (1.18% drop); 11/15/20: 8.3 mg (1.19% drop); 11/22/20: 8.2 mg (1.21% drop)

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Hi Rosetta Thanks for sharing that.You seem like your moving right along.i do the same thing about avoiding going home.im better out moving around.if i try to relax at home i get symptoms probably from having the time to focus on the symptoms.i get anxious still about mortality that causes a little depression also.does magnesium help you.

March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days

UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia.

August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only.

Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning

May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/

Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose

Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2  ativan 1mg a month as needed if that.

Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin

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I think magnesium helps. I can't point to any evidence in particular, but it is supposed to be calming, and it certainly doesn't hurt.  Too much will cause problems with diarrhea.  Even the dose on the package might be too much.  So, go slow.

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

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SLEEP

These things worked for me:

 

Walking every day or almost everyday is the most important thing I do.

 

1. Go to bed early and use a sleep mask to block out the light.  Get black out shades for the window.  I use both.

2. No screens for an hour or two before bedtime.  No blue light.  Low, golden light or candles in the house.

3. Use a fan for white noise.

4. Go to bed at the same time every night

5. Drop the temperature in your bedroom before you go to bed (I have to drop mine to 73).  This will signal your body that it's time to sleep.

6. Soothing music - yoga, meditation or singing bowls music perhaps.

7.  Walking almost everyday

 

To sleep later:

8.  Use a sleep mask/black out shades to sleep later on days you don't work.

9. If --after daylight -- you wake up anxious and can't fall back asleep, get up and do something to distract so that you can get to bed earlier that night.

10. Turn down the thermostat if you had let the temp rise in the night.  

 

If you wake up in the night:

 

11. Drink warm milk.

12. Use a microwaveable shoulder wrap or neck wrap that you can heat.  I heat mine 2-3-4 times if necessary.

13. Don't watch tv or movies or read a kindle or use the Internet. No blue light.

14.  Try to avoid turning on the lights.

15.  Turn down the thermostat a couple of degrees.

16.  Turn on a fan or some type of white noise.

17. Observe your breath -- in, out, in, out (meditation)

18. Repeat a mantra -- I am safe.  I am safe.

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

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50 minutes ago, Rosetta said:

SLEEP

These things worked for me:

 

Thanks for these really good tips, Rosetta!  

xo RM

Alcohol periodic excessive 1963-1976, Valium sporadic 1964-1973,  Imipramine off & on 1982-1985, Fluoxetine 10mg-80 mg. Oct., 1995-Jan., 2014; Cymbalta, other ADs 1/2014-3/2014; Abilify 5 mg. 3/2014 - 8/8/17; Trintellix 20 mg. 3/2014 - 9/2017; Propranolol 60-80 mg. sporadically Sept-Oct, 2017; Seroquel few days Sept 2017 (c/t); Wellbutrin 150 mg. Sept, 2017 updosed to 300 mg. few days till c/t Oct 8, 2017, fish oil, vitD, vitE Oct 16, 2017-pres. Lipoflavonoid 4/2017-pres.  Fluoxetine 10 mg. Sept-Oct 8, 2017, 20 mg. 10/9- 10/15; 10 mg. 10/16 - 12/29;  9 mg. 12/30 - 2/9; 2 mL liquid (8.1mg) 2/10 - 3/7; 1.8 mL (7.29 mg) 3/8 -3/20; 1.6 mL (6.561mg) 3/20-4/2; 1.4 mL (5.9 mg) 4/3-4/14; 1mL (4 mg.) 4/15-4/22; .9mL (3.6mg) 4/23-5/1; .81mL (3.24 mg) 5/2-5/24; .73mL (2.916mg.) 5/25-6/8; .65mL 6/9-6/23; .6mL 6/24-7/17; .58mL 7/18-7/28; .525mL 7/29-8/13; .5 mL 8/14-21; .45mL 8/22-31; .4mL 9/2-21; .35mL 9/22-10/4; .3mL 10/5-28; .25mL 10/28-11/10; .2mL 11/11-11/24; .18mL 11/25-12/3; .1mL 12/4-12/18. Zero-12/19/18-present.

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Ok thanks.I'm gonna try it tonight.low dose. I'll try some of the other stuff you listed to thank you so much for that. My problem is that if I hear any noises I'll wake up immediately and then it's hard to get back asleep especially early in the morning. I can still feel the low dose of Seroquel working because I wake up super groggy when I do get woken up and I am able to fall back asleep but I'm worried as I start to taper down to zero. That insomnia will get worse. I'm still taking a low dose of Zoloft 50 mg in the daytime and I know that's an activating drug so I'm not sure if that's revving me up or if it's actually calming the anxiety I do feel activated after I take it for a short period of time like caffeine. What's your opinion on tapering Zoloft and Seroquel I have to taper off of both of these but I'm not sure which one to do first. I'm concerned if I taper off the Seroquel first because Zoloft is an activating drug it might heightened anxiety and insomnia

March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days

UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia.

August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only.

Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning

May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/

Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose

Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2  ativan 1mg a month as needed if that.

Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin

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 holding it 50 mg of each medication but I'm also planning my next move

March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days

UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia.

August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only.

Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning

May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/

Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose

Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2  ativan 1mg a month as needed if that.

Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin

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On 7/18/2018 at 12:11 PM, Rosetta said:

Thank you everyone.  I wrote a long post with all of you tagged, but I lost it.  It wouldn't post and then disappeared.  That's been happening lately.

 

@Rabe @wantrelief @FarmGirlWorks @mirage @jonnypeters1234567  @neroli @EdinburghGuy @DMV64 @RealMe @LexAnger @Carmie @Waterfall @Hazel @Cheeky @DaveB

@Dalalea @Kristine

Songbird, Brassmonkey, Alto, JanCarol, SkyBlue, Bubbles

 

Last night, I laughed until I cried!!!!  This such HUGE, huge news!

 

I was reading a book to my daughter, and there was a part that was quite funny.  I started laughing and laughing and then tears came to my eyes.  It wasn't a weird, out of proportion, manic kind of event.  At least I don't think so.  The book was a chapter book for third graders, probably, and was written to make one laugh.  The part of the book keep building on itself.  It was sort of a suspenseful funny part.  A little girl who is a witch cannot control her magic.  She turned into a skunk in the cafeteria on her first day of school and she was trying to control her actions, but people kept doing more things to scare her and make her mad.  Then she became the size of an elephant, but she was still a skunk.  You know where this is going.

 

The amazing part is that I had a strong, POSITIVE emotion!!!  It might be the first time this has happened in over a year!!!

OMG this is so wonderful, its on going to better better. You give me hope.

((((((((((hugs)))))))))

-1995 started paxil 20mg for depression, over the years slowly increasing to 50mg up until 2014 

-2014 I decided to tapper myself not knowing how to

and crashed and doctor added 50mg of Seraquel 

I then tried again to stop taking both and ended up in hospital trying all different drugs, I soon realised after searching the internet that I was going through withdrawal, I then reinstated 40mg paxil and 50mg Seraquel 

-2015 tried tapering again too quickly and CRASHED

2/11/16  -43mg Seraquel   -40mg Paxil           

17/1/17   -43mg                   -New Paxil Brand                   

14/03/17  -43mg                   -39.5mg 

23/05/17  -43mg                   -39mg 

08/07/17  -43mg                   -38.5mg

01/09/17 -37.5mg               -37.5mg 

12/10/17  -37.5mg             - 37mg

28/10/17 -37.5mg               -36mg
19/01/18- 37.5mg               -35mg
2/05/18 -  37.5mg               -34.8mg
15/05/18 37.5mg                -34.5mg
24/05/18  37.5mg              -34mg
12/07/18 37.5mg               -33.mg
3/08/18 37.5mg                  -32.5mg  
28/08/18  37.5mg.              -31mg
16/12/18 37.5mg                -30mg
10/3/19  36.25mg              -30mg
17/3/19  35mg                   -30mg
26/3/19  33.75mg              -30mg
4/04/19 32.5mg                -30mg
21/04/19  30mg                -30mg
16/07/19  28.75 mg         -30mg
5/08/19   27.5mg             -30mg    
19/08/19 25mg                -30mg
20/10/19  25mg              -29mg
17/11/19 25mg              -28mg
7/01/20    25mg               -27mg
12/02/20   25mg             -26mg
7/03/20   25mg             -25mg
11/04/20   25mg           -24mg
4/05/20   -25mg         -23mg
5/06/20    -25mg          -22mg
23/06/20  -25mg         -21mg
15/07/20  25mg         -20mg 
04/08/20 23mg           -20mg
18/08/20 22.5mg        -20mg
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  • Moderator Emeritus

I was going to suggest you post those tips in the "Tips to help sleep" topic, but you have already done it!

2001–2002 paroxetine

2003  citalopram

2004-2008  paroxetine (various failed tapers) 
2008  paroxetine slow taper down to

2016  Aug off paroxetine
2016  citalopram May 20mg  Oct 15mg … slow taper down
2018  citalopram 13 Feb 4.6mg 15 Mar 4.4mg 29 Apr 4.2mg 6 Jul 4.1mg 17 Aug 4.0mg  18 Nov 3.8mg
2019  15 Mar 3.6mg  21 May 3.4mg  26 Dec 3.2mg 

2020  19 Feb 3.0mg 19 July 2.9mg  16 Sep 2.8mg  25 Oct 2.7mg

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Today has been ok.  Sleep wasn't bad.  I did wake up, and I had dystonia, but it was less troublesome.  I didn't need to heat my shoulder wrap to go back to sleep!  I woke up without much anxiety and my morning wasn't very anxious at all.  My daughter's little friend and his grandmother came over while my husband and I went for coffee and errands.  Usually, if the little boy is coming over I feel anxious about that.

 

This afternoon I was overstimulated by my daughter whining while I was trying to get her to do math and reading practice.  I had to take an Epsom salt bath to retreat and calm down after she finished the work.  That was the first tIme I forced her to do work all Summer.  She did some math a couple of times on her own, but now she's decided that getting the toy she wanted at the end of the Summer if she did all her work isn't that important.  I think she feels that she has a mountain of work to do because we have missed 6 weeks of it, but she only needs to do 2 math worksheets and read one book a day.  That's less than 30 minutes of work a day.  I wish I had felt well enough to make her start doing it 3 weeks ago.

 

I'm trying to not feel down about how much energy motherhood requires and how WD affects my abilities so much.  I've spent a lot of quality time with her this Summer.  That's more important than avoiding the "Summer slide."

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

Link to post

Good job .that must require good coping skills.Thanks much for the info on sleep.keep up the good work its inspiring.

March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days

UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia.

August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only.

Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning

May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/

Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose

Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2  ativan 1mg a month as needed if that.

Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin

Link to post

I just wanted to say that I think you are a wonderful mother Rosetta...you give every bit you can and then some.  You do what you are able to do which requires making choices...and for me I would also choose not to make math and all a priority when getting out to the fair and the beach and the park are shared fun activities with wonderful memories.  You are SO right...you've spent a lot of quality time with her!  THAT's most important for both of you it seems...

 

@RosetaToday has been ok.  Sleep wasn't bad.  I did wake up, and I had dystonia, but it was less troublesome.  I didn't need to heat my shoulder wrap to go back to sleep!  I woke up without much anxiety and my morning wasn't very anxious at all.  My daughter's little friend and his grandmother came over while my husband and I went for coffee and errands.  Usually, if the little boy is coming over I feel anxious about that.

 

Read that and just beamed with joy for you Rosetta...things just are getting better in more and more areas of your daily life it seems...so exciting! 💜

 

-Nardil 1976 < year, stopped. Reactions to AD's. Klonopin .5BID ?1990, 2.5mg ? til 2016

-Klonopin doubled Jan '16. Tapered to 2.25mg May '16 to Nov '16, Heart raced after 1 Lexapro, stopped. Reacting to Prevacid to tapered off. Nov

-November '16 Tapered .25mg Klonopin in hospital. Jan 2 '17 started Viibryd, 20mg from 2/20 to 6/10 '17,     

-20mg to 10mg Viibryd from 3/25 to 6/10 2017, 12/15 10% Viibryd taper...back up next day

-Clonazepam 2mg to 1.85mg 4/14 '17 to end November; taper to 1mg Clonazepam in hospital 9/1 tp 9/14 '17

-Feb '18 Amiloride .25mg  5/18 off Amiloride d/t react. Clonaz compounded  

-4/27 '18 Viibryd 9.5mg, 6/11 9.0 mg, 1/27 '19 Viibryd 8.75mg, ; Clonazepam .2mg 530pm and .7mg 1130pm, Premarin .3mg 830PM CARAFATE QID 2/27/19 to 3/5/19

-July 6'19 1/2 10mg Claritin 230pm, stopped it about July 18, started Oct 11 '19, 

-7/27 Viibryd 8.5, 8/29 Viibryd 8.25 -10/18 Carafate 1/2 NOC-10/24 Viibryd 8.0, 12/6 Viibryd 7.75, K+ 10meq qd

-NOW 1115am-Viibryd 7.75mg, 3pm-K+ 5mg, 515pm-Clonaz .2mg, 6pm-K+ 5mg, 830pm-Premarin .3mg,1115pm-Clonaz .9mg, 115am Carafate .5gm.

Link to post

Thanks Rabe.  Thanks RusTW.

 

I spent time yesterday, after my bath, on the couch watching a show that I don't like.  I can't find anything I want to watch.  My husband took my daughter out to play.  I felt stressed all day and in the evening I was very irritable especially when I broke the plastic pump mechanism on the bottle of hair detangler.  I have broken every one I have ever had - one drop, and they break.

 

This last week, I have been passing out at night as if I was pushing myself past my limit.  I have been, in fact, until yesterday and the day before when I stopped.  I passed out those two nights, too, after reading my daughter a book.

 

Last night, I woke up at 2:00 or 2:30 with dystonia, insomnia, worry and intense sadness.  That's when I realized that Mother Nature is trying to arrive.   I had to heat my wrap 3 times.  I had a couple of cortisol spikes in the night and early this morning.  This morning, I feel anxious.  I'm trying to remember that it will pass.  

 

I have a cold.  This is the 3rd day.  Feeling pretty crummy, but I think I can cope with it all better than I used to.  

 

Just the fact that I am not completely panicking is a good sign.  Normally, I would think I was going into another wave based on the way I feel and knowing that my immune system is engaged and the hormones are swirling.  Instead, I feel a little more of a sense that -- this is a bummer, but it will pass.  My mother in law just asked if she could visit -- while I was writing that last sentence -- and I had a jolt of adrenaline.  My house is in no condition for that!  Trying to calm.  We said no, we will go to her and to the beach.  I will be so glad when someday that question doesn't make me feel sick to my stomach.

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

Link to post

@RosettaJust catching up with you and you are an amazing mother. Don't fret over getting your daughter to get her work sheets done. I raised 4 kids and the time you have spent with her this summer is much more important. She will get the worksheets done and all will work out. 

 

Love to hear that your anxiety is much better. Mine is improving but still getting the 4am cortisol wake up and then anxiety sets in. It is not the heart pounding kind any more but more of a butterflies in the stomach feeling. I use to get butterflies in the stomach when I had nervous excitement. Now it is just nervousness. Looking forward to it bein back to normal. When I wake early with this, sometimes I can doze back off and other times it gets the best of me and I have to take a half of a benedryl. That always works and gets me back to sleep. 

 

Oh if this dizziiness would leave me!!!!! I just know it is going to be the last of my symptoms go to. It was the first to come. It thinks it is my best friend. Not the kind of friend I want! 

 

When does school start back up for your daughter? 

 

 

Started Wellbutrin 300xl mid July, 2009. Stopped Wellbutrin 300xl cold turkey May 8, 2017

Started having symptoms started June 2, 2017. Started Wellbutrin 150xl July 7, 2017

Started Remeron 15mg August 15, 2017. Increased Remeron to 30mg October 4, 2017

Increased Wellbutrin to 300xl November 24, 2017. Lowered Wellbutrin 300xl back to 150xl January 8, 2018

Started weaning off of Remeron 30mg. Cut to 22.25mg January 11, 2018

Cut Remeron to 15mg January 18, 2018 Cut Remeron to 7.5mg January 25, 2018

Cut Remeron to 3.5mg January 30,2018. Stopped taking Remeron February 1, 2018

Currently taking: Fish Oil, Magnesium, Calcium, Vit D, Progesterone,

Hormone Replacement Pellets-Estrogen Testosterone 

Link to post

School starts very early - August 15.  It's still Summer here until mid-September!

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

Link to post

Hi Rosetta,

You know, its not that you break things its that things are so cheap that they break if you blow them out like birthday candles I swear!  Not your fault! Happens to me so often with this special skin product so when I have one that hasn't broken I keep it and pour the broken one's contents in it. ;)

 

Im sorry about your dystonia and spikes and cold and all...so happy to hear you took care of yourself re visitors today.  You needed that!

 

Im sorry about your night, but you are absolutely right...you are handling it differently...seems to go with your healing. Wonderful to hear it all progress and unfold. You are truly an inspiration!!! 💜 

-Nardil 1976 < year, stopped. Reactions to AD's. Klonopin .5BID ?1990, 2.5mg ? til 2016

-Klonopin doubled Jan '16. Tapered to 2.25mg May '16 to Nov '16, Heart raced after 1 Lexapro, stopped. Reacting to Prevacid to tapered off. Nov

-November '16 Tapered .25mg Klonopin in hospital. Jan 2 '17 started Viibryd, 20mg from 2/20 to 6/10 '17,     

-20mg to 10mg Viibryd from 3/25 to 6/10 2017, 12/15 10% Viibryd taper...back up next day

-Clonazepam 2mg to 1.85mg 4/14 '17 to end November; taper to 1mg Clonazepam in hospital 9/1 tp 9/14 '17

-Feb '18 Amiloride .25mg  5/18 off Amiloride d/t react. Clonaz compounded  

-4/27 '18 Viibryd 9.5mg, 6/11 9.0 mg, 1/27 '19 Viibryd 8.75mg, ; Clonazepam .2mg 530pm and .7mg 1130pm, Premarin .3mg 830PM CARAFATE QID 2/27/19 to 3/5/19

-July 6'19 1/2 10mg Claritin 230pm, stopped it about July 18, started Oct 11 '19, 

-7/27 Viibryd 8.5, 8/29 Viibryd 8.25 -10/18 Carafate 1/2 NOC-10/24 Viibryd 8.0, 12/6 Viibryd 7.75, K+ 10meq qd

-NOW 1115am-Viibryd 7.75mg, 3pm-K+ 5mg, 515pm-Clonaz .2mg, 6pm-K+ 5mg, 830pm-Premarin .3mg,1115pm-Clonaz .9mg, 115am Carafate .5gm.

Link to post

Thanks, @Rabe. Things are definitely getting better.

 

Today, however, I'm having a hormone issue that has me very, very depressed.  It's really deep and came on suddenly after breakfast.  Everything feels pointless.  I have a feeling that my life is wasted.  It's really odd because I know that can't be true.  My life is no worse than average except for this WD issue.  It's as if someone else just took over my brain.  The dystonia is also getting worse.

 

I'm going to the beach as planned.  Maybe the sunlight on my skin will pull me out of this hole.

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

Link to post

Hi Rosetta - I really empathize with the hormonal component that is currently effecting you.  I just went through the wringer this week as a result of hormones, or at least I think that is what it was.....everything just feels worse.  I am so glad you are going to go to the beach as planned - I hope it helps!

-1/06 - 3/07 Cymbalta. Fast taper; withdrawal symptoms after 4 mos (didn't realize was WD)

-10/07: 100 mg Zoloft; 1 mg Klonopin - tapered off Klonopin
-Tried several times to slowly taper Zoloft by 10%, then 5% every 4-6 weeks; could never get below approx. 40 mg - spring 2012 experienced major WD symptoms due to stress; tried to updose but no relief, back on Klonopin 1 mg.
-Switched over 5-6 mos from Zoloft to Citalopram. Finished Zoloft 1/13; Citalopram 35 mg and 1 mg Klonopin.
-8/13: 27 mg Citalopram; 1 mg Klonopin

-11/14: 12.6 Citalopram - began to have bad withdrawal symptoms; out of desperation increased to 1.25 mg Klonopin at the beginning of December.  12/13/14 16 mg Citalopram - going to stay here to try to stabilize; stabilized on 16 mg Citalopram after 4-5 months

-7/15 - 3/16: reduced to 15 mg; ~ 2 months later w/d hit hard (probably r/t stress); 6/16 updosed to 20 mg Citalopram and trying to stabilize. Updosed to 1.5 Klonopin as well. Stabilized on 20 mg Citalopram after 4-5 months

8/17-9/17: feeling withdrawal symptoms at 20 mg Citalopram (due to stress) - slowly increased to 25 mg. No change in symptoms after 6 months (? tolerance ?)  - decided to start citalopram taper February 2018 (still on Klonopin 1.5 mg).

Supplements: fish oil; vitamin D3; curcumin

Citalopram taper:  2/2018 - 12/2019: 25 mg - 11.03 mg

2020: 1/14/20: 10.89 mg (1.27% drop); 1/22/20: 10.75 mg (1.29% drop); 2/28/20 toe surgery; 4/26/20: 10.62 mg (1.21% drop); 5/3/20: 10.5 mg (1.22% drop); 5/10/20: 10.4 mg (1.24% drop); 5/17/20: 10.2 mg (1.25% drop); 6/7/20: 10.10 mg (1.27% drop); 6/14/20: 9.98 mg (1.19% drop); 6/21/20: 9.85 mg (1.30% drop); 6/28/20: 9.7 mg (1.22% drop); 7/12/20: 9.6 mg (1.23% drop); 7/19/20: 9.5 mg (1.25% drop); 7/26/20: 9.4 mg (1.26% drop); 8/2/20: 9.3 mg (1.28% drop); 8/17/20: 9.14 mg (1.19% drop); 8/31/20: 9.0 mg (1.31% drop); 9/6/20: 8.9 mg (1.22% drop); 9/27/20: 8.8 mg (1.23% drop); 10/4/20: 8.7 mg (1.25% drop); 10/11/20: 8.6 mg (1.27% drop); 10/18/20: 8.5 mg (1.28% drop); 11/8/20: 8.4 mg (1.18% drop); 11/15/20: 8.3 mg (1.19% drop); 11/22/20: 8.2 mg (1.21% drop)

Link to post

 Im sorry that you are now feeling so depressed Rosetta...hoping the sun and water bring so relief....take care. 💜

-Nardil 1976 < year, stopped. Reactions to AD's. Klonopin .5BID ?1990, 2.5mg ? til 2016

-Klonopin doubled Jan '16. Tapered to 2.25mg May '16 to Nov '16, Heart raced after 1 Lexapro, stopped. Reacting to Prevacid to tapered off. Nov

-November '16 Tapered .25mg Klonopin in hospital. Jan 2 '17 started Viibryd, 20mg from 2/20 to 6/10 '17,     

-20mg to 10mg Viibryd from 3/25 to 6/10 2017, 12/15 10% Viibryd taper...back up next day

-Clonazepam 2mg to 1.85mg 4/14 '17 to end November; taper to 1mg Clonazepam in hospital 9/1 tp 9/14 '17

-Feb '18 Amiloride .25mg  5/18 off Amiloride d/t react. Clonaz compounded  

-4/27 '18 Viibryd 9.5mg, 6/11 9.0 mg, 1/27 '19 Viibryd 8.75mg, ; Clonazepam .2mg 530pm and .7mg 1130pm, Premarin .3mg 830PM CARAFATE QID 2/27/19 to 3/5/19

-July 6'19 1/2 10mg Claritin 230pm, stopped it about July 18, started Oct 11 '19, 

-7/27 Viibryd 8.5, 8/29 Viibryd 8.25 -10/18 Carafate 1/2 NOC-10/24 Viibryd 8.0, 12/6 Viibryd 7.75, K+ 10meq qd

-NOW 1115am-Viibryd 7.75mg, 3pm-K+ 5mg, 515pm-Clonaz .2mg, 6pm-K+ 5mg, 830pm-Premarin .3mg,1115pm-Clonaz .9mg, 115am Carafate .5gm.

Link to post
On 7/17/2018 at 9:11 PM, Rosetta said:

The amazing part is that I had a strong, POSITIVE emotion!!!  It might be the first time this has happened in over a year!!!

What a wonderful feeling!! I actually had tears running down my face the other day while discussing a topic with a friend that I'm passionate about. It's so wonderful to feel positive emotions! Wishing you many more healthy laughing spells!

Dalalea's Introduction

Off All SSRI Medications: Effexor 2010 one month
Sertraline 50 mg. but only took 25 mg. daily because of dizziness. 2010 to July 2017

Tapered over 2 months beginning the 1st of June 2017 -- Off Sertraline by July 30, 2017

Current Medication: Losartan (blood pressure), Albuterol (for asthma- only as needed)
Current Symptoms: tinnitus, hearing loss in one ear, allergies

My Plan: Prayer, Scripture, Walk, Yoga, Encourage Others, Healthy Eating
Generic SSRI Withdrawal Symptom and Plan Checklists and Graph.xlsx

Current Supplements: Magnesium Threonate, Fish Oil, probiotic, B-12, C, D-3

Current Essential Oils: Frankincense, Bergamot, Orange, Lemon, Lavender, Peppermint, Clove
Current Essential Oil Blends: Brain Power, Clarity, Stress Away

Link to post

I hope you had a lovely time at the beach. Gentle sunshine is always lovely.

My thread here at SA: https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/1775-bubbles/page/14/

2005 St John's Wort / 2006-2012 Lexapro 20mg, 2 failed attempts to stop, tapered over 4.5 months in early 2012

January 2013 started Sertraline, over time worked up to 100mg / July 2014 dropped from 100mg to 75mg, held for six months

2015 tapered to 50mg over several months, held for several months, some more drops

2016 Feb 35mg, 6 Mar 33mg, more drops (note big drop (calc error) & up to 25mg), more drops (about 2mg at a time)

2017 - more small drops, more long holds

2018 March at 11mg;  April 20 9mg; June 11 8.1mg; (July 10 7.7mg / July 18 7.3mg); ( Sept 2 7.2mg, Sept 5 7.1mg, Sept 9 7mg); 30 Sept 6.5mg, ? 6mg, 23 Nov 5.5mg) 19 Dec 5mg

2019 (micro drops over two weeks 24 Mar 4.9mg, 28 Mar 4.8mg, 31 Mar 4.7mg, 4 Apr 4.6mg, 7 Apr 4.5mg / 22 April 4.4mg, 26 April 4.3mg, 2 May 4.2mg, 5 May 4.1mg, 9 May 4mg), 3 Oct 3.9mg, (20 Oct 3.8mg, 27 Oct 3.7mg, 3 Nov 3.6mg), 24 Nov 3.5mg, 8 Dec 3.4mg, 15 Dec 3.3mg, 22 Dec 3.2mg

2020 19 Jan 3.1mg, 26 Jan 3.0mg; 1 Mar 2.9, 7 Mar 2.8, May (some drops here) 24 May 2.5, May 29 2.4, June 21 2.3, June 28 2.2mg,  July 4 2.1mg, July 24 (or maybe a bit before) 2mg

Current Sertraline: July 24: 2 mg / Armour Thyroid / endless allergy meds, erg

Link to post

Yes, the sunshine helped!! I was in tears as we were trying to leave the house, but I got there and stayed for hours.  It was 80 degrees.  That's unusual for this beach.   It wasn't an easy day.  However, it was better than sitting at home feeling depressed. 

 

I forgot about feeling depressed after I sat in the sun.  From "completely forlorn" to "life isn't so bad" in 1/2 an hour!  Like magic really.  I must be responding to sunlight more than normal people do? My cold kept making it hard to breathe, but the dystonia went away, too.  I did not expect that to happen.

 

I even had enough energy to walk to the snack bar.  Then, at the end of the day, I packed up the stuff by my self.  That's very different from the way I've felt most of this past year.  

 

Just had some some pedialyte and now it's off to bed.

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

Link to post

Rosetta-nice to know it went good for you.I think it sometimes isn't as bad as we expect it to be.I used to live close to the ocean.its very therapeutic in many ways.Having a cold in the summer isn't fun.get well and sleep good tonight.

 

March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days

UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia.

August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only.

Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning

May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/

Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose

Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2  ativan 1mg a month as needed if that.

Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin

Link to post
  • Moderator Emeritus
2 hours ago, Rosetta said:

Yes, the sunshine helped!! I was in tears as we were trying to leave the house, but I got there and stayed for hours.  It was 80 degrees.  That's unusual for this beach.   It wasn't an easy day.  However, it was better than sitting at home feeling depressed. 

 

I forgot about feeling depressed after I sat in the sun.  From "completely forlorn" to "life isn't so bad" in 1/2 an hour!  Like magic really.  I must be responding to sunlight more than normal people do? My cold kept making it hard to breathe, but the dystonia went away, too.  I did not expect that to happen.

 

I even had enough energy to walk to the snack bar.  Then, at the end of the day, I packed up the stuff by my self.  That's very different from the way I've felt most of this past year.  

 

Just had some some pedialyte and now it's off to bed.

 

Hi Rosetta, 

 

So glad you got some time in the sun and nature. It’s the best thing ever. There’s something about the beach that’s so soothing. I love the sound of water, whether it’s the waves crashing, the sound of a creek or the rain. It is sooo soothing. 

 

Sending you big hugs🤗🤗🤗

Been on antipsychotics, benzos, antidepressants and painkillers for chronic pain. 

Have been cold turkeyed and put on and off all sorts of things.  Was suicidal n ended up in a psych ward because I had akathisia from withdrawals. I can’t remember what I was put on but when I was released was in the same predicament with severe akathisia n was suicidal again.

Back to the psych ward and I was given a number of different drugs while there. Tapered off one when I got home n have been trying to taper off Seroquel since. It’s been years, tapering slowly but still having severe withdrawals.

I’ve  tapered from 300mg of Seroquel to 7.5mg./ March 10th 2019=7.25mg / 17th of April 2019= 7mg / June 5th=6.75mg/ July 14th=6.50mg/ 28th of August=6.25mg/ 10th of Oct= 6.20mg/ 21st October 6mg/ 16th of December 5.80mg/21st of January 5.60mg/

 

I AM NOT A MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL. These are my own views based on what I’ve experienced myself.

 

 

Link to post

Update at 17 months

 

I've seen a lot of progress in the past few months.  I'm not in Hell at the moment.  I don't feel great, but I have a few hours here and there of feeling terrible instead of whole days or weeks.  

 

The middle of the night when I wake up for about an hour or two is the most challenging emotionally.  Some nights are not hard, but most are.  

 

The days are much better.  I still cry sometimes, but it's not extreme grief.  It's more of a strong sadness.  The anxiety comes and goes, and it's less intense.  

 

Challenging circumstances are hard for me.  I still get confused, have trouble making choices, weighing the options, making decisions, etc.  Its very hard for me to sort anything --objects, emotions, pros and cons.  Once in a while, I have clarity and I can do those types of things.  

 

Dystonia comes and goes.  It's worse at night if I have it.  Overall it's less severe.

 

There have been a lot of improvements in physical symptoms, blood sugar, appetite, sleep, tummy issues, fatigue, heavy legs, Akathisia, muscle tension in general, temperature regulation, sensitivity to wind on my skin, and strength in my muscles.  My system seems to be working better.  It must be more balanced, and I suspect that my gut has healed quite a bit.

 

My period just returned 2 days ago after 3 months of hiatus.  There have been some emotional symptoms that have intensified, and I had a bad headache for a couple of days last week.  Maybe some symptoms were PMS.  I'm having dystonia and have been for a few days.  I have a cold.  At night, I can't breathe, and I'm tense.  I wake up with a lot of muscle tension on the right side of my neck and face.

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

Link to post

Hi Rosetta- how are you doing today.

March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days

UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia.

August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only.

Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning

May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/

Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose

Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2  ativan 1mg a month as needed if that.

Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin

Link to post

I've  been doing okay I've had some windows recently the waves and windows seem to come and go pretty often. I'm still getting the anxiety from time to time but the nausea is definitely better. From your update and seems like you're doing a lot better.

March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days

UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia.

August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only.

Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning

May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/

Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose

Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2  ativan 1mg a month as needed if that.

Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin

Link to post

Last night was better.  I was breathing better, and there was less tension in my neck and jaw.  I wasn't awake much in the night, and I didn't worry too much.  Earlier this morning I had a small cortisol spike.  It passed quickly, and I went back to sleep.  Yesterday was the worst of the cold.  It's all uphill from here.  So far my period hasn't sent me into a wave!!!  Amazing!

 

I had a dream that I keep having over and over, but this was a new version.  My grandfather had just died, and I was at his house.  That's the recurring theme.  It wasn't really his house at all.  It was a much larger house with a library and a study and landscaped grounds.  Quite odd, but it all seemed familiar in the dream, of course.  It was morning.  I had slept there for the first night since he died.  His caregivers were showing up to cook breakfast although they knew he was gone.  The kitchen was huge with very high ceilings.  There was a garage absolutely full of plants ready to be put in the gardens.  People were coming from everywhere to mourn and pay respects.  They were lined up outside on the road.  I was very confused, but not upset.  I didn't feel scared or worried about what might happen to me.  

 

In this dream there were none of the people who made me feel unsafe.  I didn't recognize anyone.  The ladies who were cooking were kind and friendly.  I did wonder why they were there and who authorized the purchase of all the plants.  His death was not unexpected.  But I wasn't nervous about how I would carry on, and I wasn't in that surreal state of shock that follows a death.  Also, I wasn't alone as I was for a month or so while packing the house. (My baby wasn't there or maybe she was, but she wasn't a part of the dream.). There were people and activity. 

 

I woke up feeling calm.  I realized that I always felt safe when I was at my grandfather's house before my grandmother died.  My life has been a constant roller coaster since she died in 1998.

 

I have the the sense that I'm coming to the end of a nightmare.  I feel that it's almost over and everything is going to be ok.  Maybe I'm starting to feel that I can be safe without my grandfather here to protect me, and he's not here any longer to be cruel to me either.  His cruelty and abandonment began in 1998 and ended around 2006 about a year before his wife died.  Then he showed obvious dementia symptoms in 2008, but they were developing since the car accident in 2006.  My life has been pretty stressful since 1995, and I started the Celexa in 2001.  I think that by 2006, the Celexa had become a problem -- had started to make my life more difficult.  I remember having anger issues then and feeling a lot of anxiety although my life was stable while not ideal.  The anticipation anxiety was pretty strong in 2006 and 2007.  It interfered with my ability to work and live a normal life.

 

I really think that if I hadn't taken ADs that I would have recovered from the stressors more easily and quickly.  There is no way to know, of course.  

 

Maybe the dream means that I can work it all out in my head.  I don't need my grandfather to go on with life; he used to save me from the messes my mother got us into, but that's over now.  She can't get me into a mess unless I allow it.  I don't need the cruel things he said to be erased in order for me to be ok.  He said them, but that doesn't define our relationship or who I am today.  

 

I can recover from all the trauma and the WD even if the past can't be changed.  I'm not doomed because of what my mother did or because my grandmother got dementia or because my grandfather reacted poorly to her death.  I'm not doomed because I took ADs and was kindled over and over.  I can pick up the pieces and go on from here.  Everything IS fine.  I'm safe.  I have a home and everything I need.  I'm in a better position than I've ever been before if the WD is ignored for the moment.  And that is resolving, too.

 

It's so nice to feel positive feelings and emotions about myself and my future.  

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

Link to post
  • Moderator
brassmonkey

That is an excellent break through Rosetta.

 

((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))

 

Brass

20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013.

Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks.  The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better.

Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017

 

"It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general."  Stephen Hawking

Link to post

Thanks, Brassmonkey.  I check your success story every so often.  Knowing you are out there in the land of post-WD is very reassuring.  I feel that I'm so close.  I often think "I can't wait to start living again," but I realize that I am living WITH anxiety and limitations.  I can't wait to live freely!  It's not far away!

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

Link to post

 

 

@RosettaJust read your post. I am so happy for you and dreams are pretty telling. I think you are right about being able to accept what was and to keep it in the past and that you are ready to move forward stronger and better than ever. This is so thrilling! I can hear the happiness in your writing.You are making such wonderful strides. Hearing all of this gives me more hope.

 

@brassmonkeyI am going to go back and read your success story. Sounds like it will give me a pick me up. 

 

Prayers to you both

Started Wellbutrin 300xl mid July, 2009. Stopped Wellbutrin 300xl cold turkey May 8, 2017

Started having symptoms started June 2, 2017. Started Wellbutrin 150xl July 7, 2017

Started Remeron 15mg August 15, 2017. Increased Remeron to 30mg October 4, 2017

Increased Wellbutrin to 300xl November 24, 2017. Lowered Wellbutrin 300xl back to 150xl January 8, 2018

Started weaning off of Remeron 30mg. Cut to 22.25mg January 11, 2018

Cut Remeron to 15mg January 18, 2018 Cut Remeron to 7.5mg January 25, 2018

Cut Remeron to 3.5mg January 30,2018. Stopped taking Remeron February 1, 2018

Currently taking: Fish Oil, Magnesium, Calcium, Vit D, Progesterone,

Hormone Replacement Pellets-Estrogen Testosterone 

Link to post
44 minutes ago, Rosetta said:

Everything IS fine.  I'm safe.

Oh my GOSH! This is so hopeful. SO HOPEFUL. 

Especially today as I was feeling crushed by depression.

Thank you for sharing!

xoxo

New hopefully cleaner, signature

2001 - Klonopin (.125 mg) for anxiety and sleep at night.

2010 - depressed, tried several SSRI's, settled in 2011 on Saphris (5 mg)

2011 - Dystonic reaction from Saphris. CT. Terrible withdrawal. Panic. 

2011 - Attempts to stablize: Klonopin 1.0 mg. Xanax 1mg. Geoden 20mg. Wellbutrin 100mg. Tried at this time: Seroquel, Cymbalta, Lamictal 

2014 - Vyvanse 20 mg/ADHD, Gabapentin 300 mg added/bladder pain. Wellbutrin fast taper/Rash.

2016 - Depressed - Lithium 300mg til June/Rash and only marginally effective.

2017 - June - Saphris 5 mg added cogentin for side effects

2017 - September Fast taper Saphris. Aug 29. Terrible withdrawal. Panic.

2017 - Attempts to stablize: Lithium: Aug 31 - Sept 9. Stopped. Geoden 40mg Sept 9. Fast taper to 20 mg Sept 13.  Reinstated Saphris Sept 9 (1.25 mg), updosed the Saphris Sept 11 (.2.5mg) .Vyvanse 5mg for ADHD Stopped Sept 14, reinstated sept 17. Cut to 3mg sometime in March.

Omezerpole/reflux. Fish oil supplements. .5 cogentin for possible reactions to Saphris. Oct 25 water taper of Geoden 20mg,  11/18 next 10% drop. Hold at 16.2mg. Dec 12 begin Saphris 2.5 mg taper on scale. Rapid taper doc rec./bad idea. Hold at 1.2mg, updose 2/13. Split Geoden dose 11AM/12mg 7:30PM/6mg. 3/26 Updose Geoden by 2mg to 18mg. Dec 1 split Klonopin dose. 3/23 12 hours apart 3/27. 6/18 1 mg klonopin split 12 hours apart. Sometime in Feb. Klonopin increase to 1.5 to avoid hospital. 6/4 updose Saphris to .015mg July 1 cut Saphris to .014mg. July 29 .013 Aug 29 .012 Sept 29 .011Oct 29 .010 Dec 6 .009 (0.9 mgai) Jan 26 .008 (0.8mgai) Feb 25 (0.7mgai) March 25 (0.6mgai) May 24 begin liquid taper. Cut sublingual tab to .020 in 5ML water. Pull out 1.25ML (.05mgai) 6/14 1ML .025 dry dose dissolved (.045mgai) 7/7 .Dissolve .025 in 8ML drink .009ML 7/28Dissolve .025 in 8ML drink .008ML. 8/18 Jumping! 1/10/20 Geoden taper 18mg to 16mg.2/14 14mg. 3/20 13mg 4/29 11mg 5/21 10mg/6/13 9mg/7/4 8mg/7/24 7mg 8/4 6mg 11/8 5.4mg

Link to post

Rosetta I was reading some of your earlier post in the beginning of this for you and it seems like you've came a long ways. Thanks for sharing how your healing is happening.

March-2017-Dec-2017 ativanCT /reinstated ativan 1mg tapered 2 months/June 2017-April 2018 zyprexa 10mg switched to seroquel 200-300mg in april 2018/dec-2017-present zoloft 100mg/ quit seroquel 200-300mg cold turkey May 6 2018 reinstated seroquel 100mg around May 25 2018 since then tapered to 50mg zoloft and 50 mg of seroquel presently other medications Testosterone cypionate 2oomg every 4 days

UPDATE -August 20 2018--october 20 2018 tapered off Testosterone/Nov 7 2018 --Dec 20 2018 Lamictal micro dose 2.50mg 1 1/2 weeks then reduced to 1.25 then fast tapered as it became paridoxial.nausea- racing thoughts- agitation and insomnia.

August 28 2018 to Present Cannabis indica micro dose PM bedtime only.

Presently Seroquel 37.5 mg bedtime /Zoloft 47mg morning

May 2018-Present Multivitamin/ Bcomplex/Vit C 1000MG/B12 1000MCG/Fish oils 2grams/

Jan 2019-Trace mineral liquid low dose

Update dec 2019 -29mg of zoloft tapering/Seroquel 37.5 holding/1 or 2  ativan 1mg a month as needed if that.

Black seed oil-caprylic acid-/b complex/b12/multi/D/E/melatonin

Link to post

@wantrelief @Dalalea Thank you for your notes.

 

 Dalalea, I hope you had a good cry.  I know you are going to get better just as I have.  Time will heal you.  It is very hard to wait.  

 

I'm struggling again with the hormones today.  I have that feeling of tension and electricity in my muscles that reminds me of Akathisia or might be mild Akathisia.  I have to remember that it will go away.  

 

Day before yesterday I took a very short nap.  That day was the peak of my cold. I had a very small cortisol spike when I woke up.  I may have slept for less than 15 minutes, but I did fall asleep.  I stayed home all day.

 

Yesterday, we took my daughter to the aquarium and then to the beach.  I took a walk on the beach in the water.   At least I got some exercise.  Dinner out was a debacle, and I had bad dreams about it.  I had a second bad dream and more than one cortisol spike in the night, but I didn't need to warm my wrap.  I slept until about 7:00, and the cortisol spike wasn't too bad at that point.  This morning has been anxious and all the more so as my daughter is moody.  She just being 7, but she's been whiny about the math practice.  Her mood affects me so much when I'm feeling anxious.

 

We are home today.  There is a heat advisory, and I don't feel like going to the beach again.  I just want to distract and wait for the anxiety to go away.  It is less severe than it has been in the past under similar circumstances.  

 

I'm ignoring the house.  I'm so tired of that thorn in my side.  There will be no playdates here this Summer.  There is always next Summer.  I'm fed up with being unable to address the problem and wanting to flee the mess when I feel well enough to do that.  I think my mental health is better served by letting go of trying to find a way to clear the clutter right now.

 

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

Link to post

Brain fog and obsessive compulsion:

 

I go back and forth between feeling awful because I'm doing nothing about my clutter problem and feeling that I'm taking good care of myself because I'm avoiding something that stresses me.  Of course, I can only get away from my problem by going out or focusing on a show or a book or the Internet.   The clutter and disorganization is still there waiting for me when I look up or get home from a day out.  

 

Doing small things such as clearing a specific area do not help me the way that used to before the destabilization of my nervous system.  They help very little for a short time.  The anxiety comes back because the clutter isn't the main driver of the anxiety.  It's only a situation that my mind can find as a rational cause of the anxiety.  In fact, I think that the clutter is merely a symptom of what is causing my anxiety!  It's my inability to think clearly, sort, organize and operate efficiently that is causing my anxiety.  Yet, the anxiety is preventing me from having these abilities! My nervous system itself is driving the anxiety.  

 

I think that if my whole house was perfect I would still feel the anxiety.  There is always something that is in need of attention -- the yard, the car, the Christmas decorations.  My mind would probably worry more about my daughter, having a car accident, having my house burn down or any number of other things that worry me in the night when I can't sleep.

 

I hope I can hold on to this realization and use it to find a way to address the clutter that doesn't cause too much additional anxiety.  Every so often I have a feeling of clarity and the fact that this problem has gone on so long seems ridiculous.  When those moments of clarity last longer and are stronger maybe I'll be able to make some progress.  As for today, I feel very irritable, anxious and confused, but I can imagine a time when I can sort things.  Having the ability to imagine that is far better than the way it used to be when I felt total confusion.

 

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

Link to post
  • ChessieCat changed the title to Rosetta: cold switch May 2011 & too fast taper Feb 2017

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