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neroli: is this benzo withdrawal, or other drugs interacting


neroli

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Oh neroli, I am so sorry for what your friend said.  I read your posts and admire how much you are doing despite the way you are feeling which is inspiring.  Thinking about you - WR.

-1/06 - 3/07 Cymbalta. Fast taper (essentially CT); withdrawal symptoms after 4 mos (didn't realize was WD)

-10/07: 100 mg Zoloft; 1 mg Klonopin - tapered off Klonopin after 4 mos. Several unsuccessful slow tapers of Zoloft; went up and down in dose a lot

-Spring 2013 back on 1 mg Klonopin to counter WD symptoms; switched over 5-6 mos from Zoloft to 35 mg citalopram
-Two attempts at slow tapering citalopram, always increased dose due to WD; also increased Klonopin to 1.25 mg in 2014, then to 1.5 mg in 2015

-8/17-9/17: After holding one year at 20 mg, feeling withdrawal symptoms due to stress - slowly increased to 25 mg. No change in symptoms after 6 months (? tolerance ?)  - decided to start citalopram taper February 2018 (still on Klonopin 1.5 mg).

Supplements: fish oil; magnesium; vitamin D3; curcumin

Citalopram taper:  2/2018 - 12/2019: 25 mg - 11.03 mg I 2020: 10.89 mg - 7.9 mg I 2021: 7.8 mg - 5.26 mg I 2022: 5.2 mg - 3.36 mg I 2023: 3.3 mg - 1.47 mg 2024: 1/5/24: 1.44 mg; 1/19/24: 1.40 mg; 1/26/24: 1.37 mg; 2/2/24: 1.34 mg; 2/9/24: 1.31 mg; 2/23/24: 1.28 mg; 3/1/24: 1.25 mg; 3/8/24: 1.22 mg; 3/15/24: 1.19 mg

 

 

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1 hour ago, Rabe said:

 All of us here understand.

Thank you so much, Rabe.  I thought my words would just fall into the ether but you were there to give me some self-respect again.  You're a true supporter on this site - I see you popping up to give words of encouragement - many thanks for that.  This whole process is so wearing and wearying - so many years of dealing with symptoms, now even worse since my legs have all but "gone".  Fear, isolation and uncertainty every day.  I've read the Acceptance thread from end to end.  It's a great goal - not so easy to get there.  Loss of identity, health, friendships etc etc, with no guarantee that it will get any better, with years of tapering to get through.  Hanging on to "why bother" is tough.

 

I can see by your signature that you have had a heck of a time.  That you can offer your support to others is amazing amid what must be some tough times.

 

Hugs back and many thanks

 

Neroli 💜

2006 Citalopram 20mg on and off to 2013.  April 2013 - July 2014  Sertraline, Venlafaxine, Fluoxetine, Mirtazapine v. bad reactions. July 2014 - CT Mirtazapine.  July 2014 - February 2016 Medication free, long term w/d.  February - July 2016 Fluoxetine.  Medication free, long term w/d syndrome.  2017 Jan physical breakdown.

2017 February - March Escitalopram, Nortriptyline instated.  Lorazepam, Zopiclone PRN.  April 2017 Lithium Carbonate 250mg 1 wk. 14 August 2017 finish cross to Diazepam 22.5mg daily, stop Zopiclone

Tapers:

Diazepam 

2017 21 August - 30 Dec 21.25mg to 14.5mg 2018 6 Jan - 11 May to 12mg.  2 June updose to 12.25mg - hold. 2019 (0.5mg cuts) 12 Jan - 28 Dec 12mg to 10mg 2020 (0.25mg cuts) - 25 Jan - 29 Dec 9.75mg to 6.25mg 2021 *May have bungled dose and accidentally took 1mg more for about a month (7.25mg), so 4 Jan started again at 6.5mg; 19 Jan 6.25mg; 1 Feb 6.0mg; 23 Feb 5.75mg; 9 Mar 5.5mg; 23 Mar 5.25mg; 9 Apr 5.0mg; 6 May 4.75mg; 13 May 4.5mg; 6 Jun 4mg; 12 July 3.5mg; 2 sep 3.0mg; 15 Sep 2.5mg; 1 Nov 2mg; 15 Nov 1.5mg; 16 Dec 1mg; 26 Dec 0.5mg; 2022 1 Jan - OFF

Escitalopram - 2022 1 Mar to 9mg; 29 Mar 8mg; 24 May 7mg; 21 Jun 5mg; 19 Jul 4mg; 1 Sep 3mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 31 Oct 1.5mg; 22 Nov 0.5mg; 2023 1 Jan 0.25mg; 1 Mar OFF

Nortriptyline  2018 90mg to 2020 1 Dec down to 72.5mg; 2021 20 May 70mg; 8 Jun 67.5mg; 24 Jun 65mg; 31 July 60mg; 12 Oct 55mg; 23 Oct 50mg; 2022 13 Jan 40mg; 22 Jan 30mg; 29 Mar 20mg; 26 Apr 10mg; 3 Aug 5mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 2023 1 Jan - OFF

 

1 March 2023 - off all drugs - 6-year taper off three drugs.

 

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2 hours ago, wantrelief said:

Oh neroli, I am so sorry for what your friend said.  I read your posts and admire how much you are doing despite the way you are feeling which is inspiring.  Thinking about you - WR.

Oh, WR, you're another person who has come in and said something really supportive!  Thank you so much, thank you so much.  It brings tears to my eyes. And thank you for saying I do so much, I tend to only see the things I can't do anymore and it drives all joy out of my life.  With the legs being worse in the past couple of weeks, I've begun to think I'd have to resign from my job, added to which, I  am being given more and more to do - all in new areas to me.  I don't know about you but this is the biggest hamster wheel I've ever been on - day after day.

 

You, too have a mighty history of enduring this stuff - that you are still here and supporting others is an inspiration.  Many, many thanks.

 

Neroli 💜

2006 Citalopram 20mg on and off to 2013.  April 2013 - July 2014  Sertraline, Venlafaxine, Fluoxetine, Mirtazapine v. bad reactions. July 2014 - CT Mirtazapine.  July 2014 - February 2016 Medication free, long term w/d.  February - July 2016 Fluoxetine.  Medication free, long term w/d syndrome.  2017 Jan physical breakdown.

2017 February - March Escitalopram, Nortriptyline instated.  Lorazepam, Zopiclone PRN.  April 2017 Lithium Carbonate 250mg 1 wk. 14 August 2017 finish cross to Diazepam 22.5mg daily, stop Zopiclone

Tapers:

Diazepam 

2017 21 August - 30 Dec 21.25mg to 14.5mg 2018 6 Jan - 11 May to 12mg.  2 June updose to 12.25mg - hold. 2019 (0.5mg cuts) 12 Jan - 28 Dec 12mg to 10mg 2020 (0.25mg cuts) - 25 Jan - 29 Dec 9.75mg to 6.25mg 2021 *May have bungled dose and accidentally took 1mg more for about a month (7.25mg), so 4 Jan started again at 6.5mg; 19 Jan 6.25mg; 1 Feb 6.0mg; 23 Feb 5.75mg; 9 Mar 5.5mg; 23 Mar 5.25mg; 9 Apr 5.0mg; 6 May 4.75mg; 13 May 4.5mg; 6 Jun 4mg; 12 July 3.5mg; 2 sep 3.0mg; 15 Sep 2.5mg; 1 Nov 2mg; 15 Nov 1.5mg; 16 Dec 1mg; 26 Dec 0.5mg; 2022 1 Jan - OFF

Escitalopram - 2022 1 Mar to 9mg; 29 Mar 8mg; 24 May 7mg; 21 Jun 5mg; 19 Jul 4mg; 1 Sep 3mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 31 Oct 1.5mg; 22 Nov 0.5mg; 2023 1 Jan 0.25mg; 1 Mar OFF

Nortriptyline  2018 90mg to 2020 1 Dec down to 72.5mg; 2021 20 May 70mg; 8 Jun 67.5mg; 24 Jun 65mg; 31 July 60mg; 12 Oct 55mg; 23 Oct 50mg; 2022 13 Jan 40mg; 22 Jan 30mg; 29 Mar 20mg; 26 Apr 10mg; 3 Aug 5mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 2023 1 Jan - OFF

 

1 March 2023 - off all drugs - 6-year taper off three drugs.

 

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Bit of a log:

 

5.30 on Saturday afternoon and I'm waiting for 6.00pm to hit so I can have my tea and go to bed - put up my achy legs.

 

My legs have felt worse this week - weaker and more wobbly. I had been going into the office four days a week.  I made it in on only one day this week, Friday, and left early because I felt the legs were more wobbly. I do prefer to be in the office because it gives me contact with people, even though it can be a bit more bit more stressful.  Small things can bring on stress: like a colleague came over to my desk and asked if I was creating a folder to keep information about a new project in.  As it happens, I was consolidating information into one folder at that very time - she stayed and watched while I was moving files from one folder to another (I fully understand her staying to watch, so that she knew where I was saving stuff).   I've always had a bit of a stress response to people looking over my shoulder while I work but now it is heightened by my weakened CNS and stress controllers.

 

I've realised that there's a fair bit of stress in my work learning new areas of the business and getting a more full schedule of things to do.  So I'm going to have to work to my best ability and build in more breaks/stress relievers.  (To be honest, any sort of work would be stressful at the moment, given that even thinking of going for a walk causes stress).  My strategies are to leave work earlier and not to work at the weekend (this provided me wth two benefits: something to do in the times I'm sat in my home alone and keeping up what income I can).  It will mean less income and I'll have to see how my manager goes with the reduced hours.  And I may need to work on finding ways to cope with the isolated times.

 

There is a big meeting I'm organising, in September, with external suppliers coming in - it is timetabled for 3 hours - and I'm worrying about this.  If I can go to work and stay at my computer and complete work, with occasional meetings with colleagues, I feel I can just about manage.  3 hours in a room full of new people, where I'll have to appear to be "up" and on top of the game, mingling during morning tea and doing a bit of presenting is sounding like agony to me.  Dealing with anxiety, bladder issues, needing to walk and stretch my muscles, makes me feel like I'm going to be stuck in a horror movie.  I have yet to work out a strategy to cope with this.

 

There has been a bit of a friendship wobble this week.  When I first moved into this area (I came to live here with my mum after I'd been back to England for a while and stayed and did part-time care of her until she died a year later) I made contact with a woman through an internet newsletter and we started walking together, once a week for about an hour.  It was a lifeline for me, a bit of time out from "caring" and a place that we could both share our concerns and pleasures in life.  We often laughed so hard it made walking impossible until we'd calmed down.  Outside of this walking time, we rarely made contact, we weren't in-the-pocket friends but the time together walking was a form of sustenance for me.  

 

When I crashed in early 2017, she was there helping me with the suicidal anxiety, taking me shopping and even washing my hair when my legs and wooziness were so bad I couldn't take a shower.  At the same time, she was preparing to get married to a man she'd met a year or so before and she brought him in to help - offering him for things like trimming hedges and garden help, taking me for walks when she wasn't available and saying that I could ring anytime and ask him for any help.  He also re-iterated this. Their generosity and support during this period (when they should have been celebrating their marriage) was outstanding.  I've been careful to not call on their time too much - for instance when I was mentioning I probably needed to get a house cleaner, she offered to do it for free for me but I declined saying I needed to keep our friendship out of that sort of agreement and I wanted to find someone I could have a purely business relationship with.  But there is no doubt that I have relied on them a lot.

 

One of those times was when she asked if I would like him to help me with sorting out a small pension that had matured.  He was an accountant and I was glad to have his opinion on something that had caused my damaged brain a lot of frustration - there was a complicated process to go through.  Through his calm, gentle approach and his knowledge of how money systems work, we managed to get it sorted out (it had been concerning me for over a year).  When it was finally sorted, I sent him an email to say it was all concluded and to thank him for his help.  It just so happened that they were watching something on his laptop when my message came in, so my friend saw my email to him when it arrived.

 

The next time I saw him was when I asked him if he would take me for a walk, (my friend was away from town and had said he was free to go for walks if I wanted) which he did, but when he dropped me off and I thanked him and said I really appreciated his doing that for me, he didn't make eye contact, just stared straight ahead.  Then, I realised I'd left my hat and glasses in his car and he dropped them in my mail box, so I texted to say thank you but never received a reply from him.  This was out of character for him, I thought, and combined with the way he'd been when he brought me back from the walk, I had the intuition that something wasn't right and worried if I'd offended him.  I wanted to ask him directly about this but didn't manage to make contact with him.  

 

When I next saw my friend for a walk, I brought it up with her and asked if things were ok because I'd felt his behaviour was out of character.  It turned out that it was my friend who had the "problem" and had been very upset that I hadn't told her about the resolution of the pension first, given that we'd talked about it during our walks.  Apparently, she'd seen his going out for a walk with me as not being supportive of her and her upset about the email I sent him.  There's more of her backstory to this which I won't go into.  I didn't feel culpable as having done something wrong and I think we managed to sort things out.  But I don't know how things will go from here - maybe things won't be the same again and boundaries will be re-drawn, time will tell.  It makes me think I need to try to get other friends, so that I'm not so dependent on one or two - not sure how to go about this at the moment, seeing as I have limited mobility.

 

I've gone into some detail to tell this tale, in some ways as it seems like I'm talking to a "support group" to post it in SA and also because I became very aware, again, at how "triggering" of symptoms something like this can be.  I'd thought I was losing friends who I needed desperately.  

 

I thought I'd try reducing again this week, taking a small amount off the benzo., then realised the clocks go forward next weekend which always gives me a hit, then a week later it's the big meeting I'm nervous about so I've decided to keep holding to get over those two events.

 

I've ventured back into the mental health service, there's a new psychologist at the community MH centre and I saw her on Thursday. I was very defensive, almost to belligerence, again, she didn't really want to know about the drug history and started digging around in my personal history for evidence of what could have been "stored up trauma" that caused my break down last year. So damned insulting when they do that and such a failure on their part to offer proper care. She's offering techniques to help with stress and anxiety so that I can try to manage the stress which will make my legs worse (I do notice that stress makes me more wobbly) - so I guess it will be CBT, which I find an un-holy pain. I'd wanted someone I could go and talk to about the changes and losses I've had since all this started in 2014 and support to carry on doing the best I can. I've had a think and realised it may be of to do the CBT as long as I can keep my mind open (it would help if she would acknowledge the part that drugs have played in my being in the mental health system in the first place) practising techniques to alleviate stress could be helpful for now and for the long term. Will see how it goes - at least it's free.

 

My big achievements this weekend are to have done my own grocery shopping, washed my clothes, mended the weed sprayer (I think ) and gone round the paths spraying the array of unwanted greenery that has grown up, trimmed a couple of vines, done some knitting and written this log. Even 20 mins. weed spraying left me shaky and weak. The rest of the time, I've tried to rest up - reading a bit on SA, as well as the knitting. Can't get down to reading a book, though, just doesn't grab me.  Haven't felt too isolated or down today. Maybe sunshine outside helped with that.

 

Reading profiles on here of people who seem to have been equally walloped by meds. and are getting through/improving helps to keep me hoping this is not permanent damage (though I know there is most likely a long time to get through to some sense of "normal" health).  So thank you all for contributing to this site - I need hope!

 

It's now 2.30 on Sunday afternoon and I can feel I'm getting more anxious about going into work tomorrow.  I'm also getting more tired, as is usual, and shaky.  3.00pm is my time to switch off completely and have a cup of tea and bread and butter, so I'm watching the clock tick by every minute, hanging out for it.

 

All the best to everyone on this site, this is tough for all of us.

 

Neroli 💜

 

 

2006 Citalopram 20mg on and off to 2013.  April 2013 - July 2014  Sertraline, Venlafaxine, Fluoxetine, Mirtazapine v. bad reactions. July 2014 - CT Mirtazapine.  July 2014 - February 2016 Medication free, long term w/d.  February - July 2016 Fluoxetine.  Medication free, long term w/d syndrome.  2017 Jan physical breakdown.

2017 February - March Escitalopram, Nortriptyline instated.  Lorazepam, Zopiclone PRN.  April 2017 Lithium Carbonate 250mg 1 wk. 14 August 2017 finish cross to Diazepam 22.5mg daily, stop Zopiclone

Tapers:

Diazepam 

2017 21 August - 30 Dec 21.25mg to 14.5mg 2018 6 Jan - 11 May to 12mg.  2 June updose to 12.25mg - hold. 2019 (0.5mg cuts) 12 Jan - 28 Dec 12mg to 10mg 2020 (0.25mg cuts) - 25 Jan - 29 Dec 9.75mg to 6.25mg 2021 *May have bungled dose and accidentally took 1mg more for about a month (7.25mg), so 4 Jan started again at 6.5mg; 19 Jan 6.25mg; 1 Feb 6.0mg; 23 Feb 5.75mg; 9 Mar 5.5mg; 23 Mar 5.25mg; 9 Apr 5.0mg; 6 May 4.75mg; 13 May 4.5mg; 6 Jun 4mg; 12 July 3.5mg; 2 sep 3.0mg; 15 Sep 2.5mg; 1 Nov 2mg; 15 Nov 1.5mg; 16 Dec 1mg; 26 Dec 0.5mg; 2022 1 Jan - OFF

Escitalopram - 2022 1 Mar to 9mg; 29 Mar 8mg; 24 May 7mg; 21 Jun 5mg; 19 Jul 4mg; 1 Sep 3mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 31 Oct 1.5mg; 22 Nov 0.5mg; 2023 1 Jan 0.25mg; 1 Mar OFF

Nortriptyline  2018 90mg to 2020 1 Dec down to 72.5mg; 2021 20 May 70mg; 8 Jun 67.5mg; 24 Jun 65mg; 31 July 60mg; 12 Oct 55mg; 23 Oct 50mg; 2022 13 Jan 40mg; 22 Jan 30mg; 29 Mar 20mg; 26 Apr 10mg; 3 Aug 5mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 2023 1 Jan - OFF

 

1 March 2023 - off all drugs - 6-year taper off three drugs.

 

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  • 3 weeks later...

If anyone out there sees this can you help me to forgive myself for going back on psychotropic drugs back in early 2017 when I had 24/7 anxiety and started using anxiolytics more and more to combat it, and then, after weeks of this, relented and went on to Escitalopram (which did nothing to alleviate anxiety) and then went on to Nortriptyline.  So I'm now on 3 drugs that I need to reduce, have anxiety much of the time, struggle with how to keep on going, and have all sorts of other issues like weak legs, hunger all the time, loss of social life and exercise etc etc.  Still managing to hold on to a job but getting harder.

 

It's impossible to turn the clock back, I know, and I probably need to give myself a break and realise I did what I thought was best at the time - I was in that 24/7 anxiety for weeks and in danger of losing my job.  I tried the relaxation techniques the community mental health nurse gave me and I did yoga when I could.  I just wish I"d been able to ride it/work harder at the relaxation techniques (which didn't bring any relief but the CMH nurse kept telling me with practice I would be able to manage it).  Maybe I would have been in a better place now.

 

This may be a needy cry from me but if anyone can offer some contribution to how I can accept my "transgression" back to the world of drugs and the long road ahead to get off them I'd be grateful.

 

Best wishes to all

 

Neroli

2006 Citalopram 20mg on and off to 2013.  April 2013 - July 2014  Sertraline, Venlafaxine, Fluoxetine, Mirtazapine v. bad reactions. July 2014 - CT Mirtazapine.  July 2014 - February 2016 Medication free, long term w/d.  February - July 2016 Fluoxetine.  Medication free, long term w/d syndrome.  2017 Jan physical breakdown.

2017 February - March Escitalopram, Nortriptyline instated.  Lorazepam, Zopiclone PRN.  April 2017 Lithium Carbonate 250mg 1 wk. 14 August 2017 finish cross to Diazepam 22.5mg daily, stop Zopiclone

Tapers:

Diazepam 

2017 21 August - 30 Dec 21.25mg to 14.5mg 2018 6 Jan - 11 May to 12mg.  2 June updose to 12.25mg - hold. 2019 (0.5mg cuts) 12 Jan - 28 Dec 12mg to 10mg 2020 (0.25mg cuts) - 25 Jan - 29 Dec 9.75mg to 6.25mg 2021 *May have bungled dose and accidentally took 1mg more for about a month (7.25mg), so 4 Jan started again at 6.5mg; 19 Jan 6.25mg; 1 Feb 6.0mg; 23 Feb 5.75mg; 9 Mar 5.5mg; 23 Mar 5.25mg; 9 Apr 5.0mg; 6 May 4.75mg; 13 May 4.5mg; 6 Jun 4mg; 12 July 3.5mg; 2 sep 3.0mg; 15 Sep 2.5mg; 1 Nov 2mg; 15 Nov 1.5mg; 16 Dec 1mg; 26 Dec 0.5mg; 2022 1 Jan - OFF

Escitalopram - 2022 1 Mar to 9mg; 29 Mar 8mg; 24 May 7mg; 21 Jun 5mg; 19 Jul 4mg; 1 Sep 3mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 31 Oct 1.5mg; 22 Nov 0.5mg; 2023 1 Jan 0.25mg; 1 Mar OFF

Nortriptyline  2018 90mg to 2020 1 Dec down to 72.5mg; 2021 20 May 70mg; 8 Jun 67.5mg; 24 Jun 65mg; 31 July 60mg; 12 Oct 55mg; 23 Oct 50mg; 2022 13 Jan 40mg; 22 Jan 30mg; 29 Mar 20mg; 26 Apr 10mg; 3 Aug 5mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 2023 1 Jan - OFF

 

1 March 2023 - off all drugs - 6-year taper off three drugs.

 

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You are forgiven!!!  How anyone gets through this I really can't imagine -- and I am one of those people.  You have no idea how if someone I trust -- a Mod -- said "There's a new drug!!  It works! Our prayers are answered!" I would be signing up.  To be in that sort of desperation and have someone you trusted since you were a child -- a doctor -- say this drug is what you need and not take it when you didn't have SA?!  Of course you took what the doctor gave you!!  What a shame s/he didn't know what to tell you!  

 

You can forgive yourself.  We have all trusted them, and they have no clue what they are doing -- None.  How could they?  They blindly trust the pharm companies although they really should be leery of them.  Only the doctors who have been through it themselves have any earthly clue what we suffer.  That there are any out there who have not experienced this and believe these drugs cause dysautonomia is due a small percentage of doctors and health workers who actually care -- who do not simply collect their pay and go home every night blissfully ignorant.  

 

You could not have known, Neroli.  You could not have known!

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Neroli,

 

I couldn't say it any better than Rosetta did.  You did what you thought was best at the time, and you were desperate.  You are forgiven and please forgive yourself! 

Gridley Introduction

 

Lexapro 20 mg since 2004.  Begin Brassmonkey Slide Taper Jan. 2017.   

End 2017 year 1 of taper at 9.25mg 

End 2018 year 2 of taper at 4.1mg

End 2019 year 3 of taper at 1.0mg  

Oct. 30, 2020  Jump to zero from 0.025mg.  Current dose: 0.000mg

3 year, 10 month taper is 100% complete.

 

Ativan 1 mg to 1.875mg 1986-2020, two CT's and reinstatements

Nov. 2020, 7-week Ativan-Valium crossover to 18.75mg Valium

Feb. 2021, begin 10%/4 week taper of 18.75mg Valium 

End 2021  year 1 of Valium taper at 6mg

End 2022 year 2 of Valium taper at 2.75mg 

End 2023 year 3 of Valium taper at 1mg

Jan. 24, 2024: Hold at 1mg and shift to Imipramine taper.

Taper is 95% complete.

 

Imipramine 75 mg daily since 1986.  Jan.-Sept. 2016 tapered to 14.4mg  

March 22, 2022: Begin 10%/4 week taper

Aug. 5, 2022: hold at 9.5mg and shift to Valium taper

Jan. 24, 2024: Resume Imipramine taper.  Current dose as of Feb. 22: 7.6mg

Taper is 90% complete.  

  

Supplements: multiple, quercetin, omega-3, vitamins C, E and D3, magnesium glycinate, probiotics, zinc, melatonin .3mg, anti-candida, iron, serrapeptase, nattokinase


I am not a medical professional and this is not medical advice but simply information based on my own experience, as well as other members who have survived these drugs.

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Neroli forgiving others seems easy, forgiving ourselves is always more challenging, especially in WD I think because our bodies and minds are so unbalancesd that it is hard to discern what and who we really are.

I wanted to say that it is not your transgression, in my mind...but rather that of the doctors who suggest these things.  THEY are the ones who ought to be asking for forgiveness.  You did what was suggested to you and what you believed would help, per a doctor/professional so that you could improve your situation at home, at work, with those you love including you and your life.  We all have done the same...believing in something we didnt know because we trusted the person suggesting it. I did it for my family after being told it would help me..I wanted to be better.  Thank goodness we are here, Neroli.  That there are people who care and have the knowledge and compassion to help.  Have you tried a loving kindness meditation?  Give yourself love and be kind to yourself...I say that knowing how difficult that can be in the midst of near emotions such as shame and guilt.  Please know that I am thinking about you Neroli...you are a lovely, strong soul and you will get through all this!💜

 

-Nardil 1976 < year, stopped. React to AD's. Klonopin .5BID 1990, 2.5mg til 2016

-Klonopin doubled Jan '16. Taper to 2.25mg May to Nov '16. Bad react to Lexapro, stop. React to Prevacid too, taper off. 

-November '16 Tapered .25mg Klonopin in hospital. Jan '17 started Viibryd, 20mg from Feb to June '17,     

-20mg to 10mg Viibryd from 3/25 to 6/10 2017, 12/15 10% Viibryd taper...back up next day

-Clonazepam 2mg to 1.85mg 4/14 '17 to end November; taper to 1mg Clonazepam in hospital 9/1 tp 9/14 '17

-Feb '18 Amiloride .25mg  5/18 off Amiloride d/t react. Clonaz compounded  

-4/27 '18 Viibryd 9.5mg, 6/11 9.0 mg, 1/27 '19 Viibryd 8.75mg, ; Clonazepam .2mg 530pm and .7mg 1130pm, Premarin .3mg 830PM CARAFATE QID 2/27/19 to 3/5/19

-July 6'19 1/2 10mg Claritin 230pm, stopped it about July 18, started Oct 11 '19, 

-7/27 Viibryd 8.5, 8/29 8.25, 10/24 8.0, 12/19 7.75, Feb '20 7.50, 3/20 7.25, 5/20 7.0, 6/20 6.75, 7/20 6.5, 8/20 6.25, 10/2 20 6.0, 11/25'20 5.75, 1/9/21 5.5, 2/23 5.25

-1015 AM Viibryd, vit D 4,000IU 130, 415 Clonazepam .2mg, 815 Premarin .3mg, 1015 Clonaz .7mg,

  1115 3t fish oil+D 1145 Castor Oil 650mg(4) 1230 Carafate 1/2GM,Methylated B Vit  1/week,Reacted Mag prn

Link to comment

neuro emotions...not near emotions...

-Nardil 1976 < year, stopped. React to AD's. Klonopin .5BID 1990, 2.5mg til 2016

-Klonopin doubled Jan '16. Taper to 2.25mg May to Nov '16. Bad react to Lexapro, stop. React to Prevacid too, taper off. 

-November '16 Tapered .25mg Klonopin in hospital. Jan '17 started Viibryd, 20mg from Feb to June '17,     

-20mg to 10mg Viibryd from 3/25 to 6/10 2017, 12/15 10% Viibryd taper...back up next day

-Clonazepam 2mg to 1.85mg 4/14 '17 to end November; taper to 1mg Clonazepam in hospital 9/1 tp 9/14 '17

-Feb '18 Amiloride .25mg  5/18 off Amiloride d/t react. Clonaz compounded  

-4/27 '18 Viibryd 9.5mg, 6/11 9.0 mg, 1/27 '19 Viibryd 8.75mg, ; Clonazepam .2mg 530pm and .7mg 1130pm, Premarin .3mg 830PM CARAFATE QID 2/27/19 to 3/5/19

-July 6'19 1/2 10mg Claritin 230pm, stopped it about July 18, started Oct 11 '19, 

-7/27 Viibryd 8.5, 8/29 8.25, 10/24 8.0, 12/19 7.75, Feb '20 7.50, 3/20 7.25, 5/20 7.0, 6/20 6.75, 7/20 6.5, 8/20 6.25, 10/2 20 6.0, 11/25'20 5.75, 1/9/21 5.5, 2/23 5.25

-1015 AM Viibryd, vit D 4,000IU 130, 415 Clonazepam .2mg, 815 Premarin .3mg, 1015 Clonaz .7mg,

  1115 3t fish oil+D 1145 Castor Oil 650mg(4) 1230 Carafate 1/2GM,Methylated B Vit  1/week,Reacted Mag prn

Link to comment

Kia ora Rosetta, Gridley and Rabe

 

You have flown in like angels!  Angels from across the seas.Thank you so much for your heartfelt words of encouragement and empathy.

5 hours ago, Rosetta said:

You can forgive yourself.  We have all trusted them, and they have no clue what they are doing -- None

Thank you Rosetta, for your permission to forgive! The docs don't know what they are doing.  If my doc. had known/fessed up many years ago what the risks are with these drugs, I wouldn't have gone on one in the first place (or maybe I would, but it would have been a better informed choice and one that the doc recognised as a decision to be taken armed with the truth about what the drugs do).  Had she known more about withdrawal, she probably wouldn't have tried me on four different ones - maybe she might even have advised a sloooow taper off the Citalopram I was on at the time before bludgeoning my body with the ups and downs of changing drugs.

6 hours ago, Gridley said:

You did what you thought was best at the time, and you were desperate.  You are forgiven and please forgive yourself! 

Gridley, thank you for your support, too.  I did what I thought I only could, I took a punt and the Pdoc and my Doc more or less left the choice of drug to me.  How the hell was I supposed to know what was going to work? - I did it because I'd seen that someone else had stabilised on Esci. after 20 months off and had hit a big wave but it didn't work for me and that led to another drug.  I was desperate.  I don't know if you've seen Lucinda Meyer on Youtube but I was like her, without the extreme akathisia she has where she can't stop rocking from side to side, but just as ramped up with anxiety. How she's got through all the months of what she's been going through is beyond belief.

 

5 hours ago, Rabe said:

I did it for my family after being told it would help me..I wanted to be better.  Thank goodness we are here, Neroli.  That there are people who care and have the knowledge and compassion to help.  Have you tried a loving kindness meditation?

Yes, Rabe, thank goodness you are all here, we are here (not that we want to be - we are all going through the wringer) how much more terrible would it be to be facing this without others who understand, know from experience, to be facing Docs who don't have a clue (I still don't understand why they don't, and if they do, how they can say they don't with such convincing looks of bemusement on their faces).  I did do loving kindness meditation (metta bhavana) when I was involved with a Buddhist group some years ago - I did quite a bit of it and had a really hard time feeling self-metta.  I don't think I'm alone - there's a buddhist order member called Maitreybhandu from the London Buddhist centre who has a whole series of videos on Youtube called "Who Hates the Metta Bhavana?", which I switch into occasionally because he lays out really well how we can all have a hard time feeling self-"love" and that we perhaps have too high an expectation of what it means and feels like.  It can be something as simple as realising that when you put on a warm coat in the winter, you are practising self-love - I thought it meant I had to have these overwhelmingly warm feelings towards myself, my friends, neutral people and people I disliked - tough ask.  But with practice small embers may burn brighter.  I like his down-to-earth approach to buddhism and watch a number of his videos for some inner consolation.

 

Anyway,  I don't watch all the horror stories on Youtube, just in case you think I sit here scaring myself to death, I did just watch one by Baylissa Frederick of Bloom in Wellness that she posted in April this year and she said she had helped about 9,000 people, people who had been on all sorts of drugs, polydrugged, kindled etc.etc. and remains certain that with time all of us can get through and come to a place of better well-being.  Hope.

 

I've also started Acceptance and Commitment (has links with buddhist thinking) Therapy with a psychologist at the MH centre (the same MH service where my long-term withdrawal syndrome was dismissed by the Pdoc).  It's taken me three times of meeting her to establish some sense of trust that she understands that I'm dealing with drug damage, that I'm not that keen on hearing the word "negative" as in "when we think negative thoughts we create a negative feedback loop" because for me that triggers the "I'm not doing good enough" response and I sure as eggs is eggs have given everything my best shot this past year and a half to keep on with the vestiges of the "normal" life I had before the breakdown (even though that "normal" life was four years of post-withdrawal syndrome).  I feel, after the third time of meeting with her, I've got to a place where there are some foundations I've laid and she seems to be in agreement with/understanding that I can have some trust in trying this process.  And given the state of MH services in this country, by all accounts I'm extremely fortunate to have been offered anything in the public system.  So, can only have a go - and hopefully come to some acceptance, including forgiving myself.

 

Nga mihi nui ki a koutou me aroha (which is probably a not very correct way of saying "big blessings to you all and love" in Maori, as it is Te wiki o the Reo Maori, Maori language week, over here, and I'm sorry but I couldn't work out how to put the macrons over some of the "a"s).

 

I know you are all coping wth our own particular set of horrid symptoms and I so admire the way you support each other.

 

Neroli 💜

2006 Citalopram 20mg on and off to 2013.  April 2013 - July 2014  Sertraline, Venlafaxine, Fluoxetine, Mirtazapine v. bad reactions. July 2014 - CT Mirtazapine.  July 2014 - February 2016 Medication free, long term w/d.  February - July 2016 Fluoxetine.  Medication free, long term w/d syndrome.  2017 Jan physical breakdown.

2017 February - March Escitalopram, Nortriptyline instated.  Lorazepam, Zopiclone PRN.  April 2017 Lithium Carbonate 250mg 1 wk. 14 August 2017 finish cross to Diazepam 22.5mg daily, stop Zopiclone

Tapers:

Diazepam 

2017 21 August - 30 Dec 21.25mg to 14.5mg 2018 6 Jan - 11 May to 12mg.  2 June updose to 12.25mg - hold. 2019 (0.5mg cuts) 12 Jan - 28 Dec 12mg to 10mg 2020 (0.25mg cuts) - 25 Jan - 29 Dec 9.75mg to 6.25mg 2021 *May have bungled dose and accidentally took 1mg more for about a month (7.25mg), so 4 Jan started again at 6.5mg; 19 Jan 6.25mg; 1 Feb 6.0mg; 23 Feb 5.75mg; 9 Mar 5.5mg; 23 Mar 5.25mg; 9 Apr 5.0mg; 6 May 4.75mg; 13 May 4.5mg; 6 Jun 4mg; 12 July 3.5mg; 2 sep 3.0mg; 15 Sep 2.5mg; 1 Nov 2mg; 15 Nov 1.5mg; 16 Dec 1mg; 26 Dec 0.5mg; 2022 1 Jan - OFF

Escitalopram - 2022 1 Mar to 9mg; 29 Mar 8mg; 24 May 7mg; 21 Jun 5mg; 19 Jul 4mg; 1 Sep 3mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 31 Oct 1.5mg; 22 Nov 0.5mg; 2023 1 Jan 0.25mg; 1 Mar OFF

Nortriptyline  2018 90mg to 2020 1 Dec down to 72.5mg; 2021 20 May 70mg; 8 Jun 67.5mg; 24 Jun 65mg; 31 July 60mg; 12 Oct 55mg; 23 Oct 50mg; 2022 13 Jan 40mg; 22 Jan 30mg; 29 Mar 20mg; 26 Apr 10mg; 3 Aug 5mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 2023 1 Jan - OFF

 

1 March 2023 - off all drugs - 6-year taper off three drugs.

 

Link to comment

I think you are AMAZING, Neroli!!!

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

Link to comment
9 hours ago, Rosetta said:

I think you are AMAZING, Neroli!!!

Dear Rosetta, what lovely words to send to me.  I"m not sure how I've earned that but I do know that everyone on this forum is amazing just to be able to keep coping with the assaults from the withdrawal process.  I watch your thread at times and you just keep on keeping on with such difficulties with sleep and cortisol spikes and I wonder how you manage to do what you do - looking after your daughter, going to the beach and taking walks - keeping things going to the best of your ability in this situation.  I think you are amazing!  Of course, we'd all feel amazing if this wasn't happening to us - and for me, today is one of intense fatigue and apathy, the kind that makes you wonder how you will get through the next hour, be bothered to make and eat food - and then on into "how will I manage to get to work tomorrow if I'm like this".  I am trying to wind my thoughts back in and to accept that today is like it is, tomorrow will be like it is and I can't predict that.  I will have to go with whatever this stuff throws at me.  It's a constant scary ride - and the scares use up energy.  So I hope I can get to a place where I'm not using so much energy in fear and accepting that if I feel apathy that is what it's like right now - it will change.

 

I've tried a 1% cut in Esci. this week,  don't know whether that is part of it, or fatigue from the week catching up.  Had a big meeting last week and I'd been worrying about coping with it - I got through it, all three + hours of it.  Could be backlash from that.  And now I have a new delightful symptom - constant hunger, no matter what I eat.

 

I see you had a better day on Friday, which is great to hear.  You are doing the best for yourself.  Wishing you more of the better days and cheering you on from the sidelines.

 

Arohanui

 

Neroli. 💜

2006 Citalopram 20mg on and off to 2013.  April 2013 - July 2014  Sertraline, Venlafaxine, Fluoxetine, Mirtazapine v. bad reactions. July 2014 - CT Mirtazapine.  July 2014 - February 2016 Medication free, long term w/d.  February - July 2016 Fluoxetine.  Medication free, long term w/d syndrome.  2017 Jan physical breakdown.

2017 February - March Escitalopram, Nortriptyline instated.  Lorazepam, Zopiclone PRN.  April 2017 Lithium Carbonate 250mg 1 wk. 14 August 2017 finish cross to Diazepam 22.5mg daily, stop Zopiclone

Tapers:

Diazepam 

2017 21 August - 30 Dec 21.25mg to 14.5mg 2018 6 Jan - 11 May to 12mg.  2 June updose to 12.25mg - hold. 2019 (0.5mg cuts) 12 Jan - 28 Dec 12mg to 10mg 2020 (0.25mg cuts) - 25 Jan - 29 Dec 9.75mg to 6.25mg 2021 *May have bungled dose and accidentally took 1mg more for about a month (7.25mg), so 4 Jan started again at 6.5mg; 19 Jan 6.25mg; 1 Feb 6.0mg; 23 Feb 5.75mg; 9 Mar 5.5mg; 23 Mar 5.25mg; 9 Apr 5.0mg; 6 May 4.75mg; 13 May 4.5mg; 6 Jun 4mg; 12 July 3.5mg; 2 sep 3.0mg; 15 Sep 2.5mg; 1 Nov 2mg; 15 Nov 1.5mg; 16 Dec 1mg; 26 Dec 0.5mg; 2022 1 Jan - OFF

Escitalopram - 2022 1 Mar to 9mg; 29 Mar 8mg; 24 May 7mg; 21 Jun 5mg; 19 Jul 4mg; 1 Sep 3mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 31 Oct 1.5mg; 22 Nov 0.5mg; 2023 1 Jan 0.25mg; 1 Mar OFF

Nortriptyline  2018 90mg to 2020 1 Dec down to 72.5mg; 2021 20 May 70mg; 8 Jun 67.5mg; 24 Jun 65mg; 31 July 60mg; 12 Oct 55mg; 23 Oct 50mg; 2022 13 Jan 40mg; 22 Jan 30mg; 29 Mar 20mg; 26 Apr 10mg; 3 Aug 5mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 2023 1 Jan - OFF

 

1 March 2023 - off all drugs - 6-year taper off three drugs.

 

Link to comment

and you just keep keeping on as well Neroli...you work, take care of your home and yourself, get to work, got through your meeting...those are such huge huge things!  I wanted to say I wind you well with your 1% drop this week.  What form of medication are you using to drop?  Hopefully an easy one!  Take care!

-Nardil 1976 < year, stopped. React to AD's. Klonopin .5BID 1990, 2.5mg til 2016

-Klonopin doubled Jan '16. Taper to 2.25mg May to Nov '16. Bad react to Lexapro, stop. React to Prevacid too, taper off. 

-November '16 Tapered .25mg Klonopin in hospital. Jan '17 started Viibryd, 20mg from Feb to June '17,     

-20mg to 10mg Viibryd from 3/25 to 6/10 2017, 12/15 10% Viibryd taper...back up next day

-Clonazepam 2mg to 1.85mg 4/14 '17 to end November; taper to 1mg Clonazepam in hospital 9/1 tp 9/14 '17

-Feb '18 Amiloride .25mg  5/18 off Amiloride d/t react. Clonaz compounded  

-4/27 '18 Viibryd 9.5mg, 6/11 9.0 mg, 1/27 '19 Viibryd 8.75mg, ; Clonazepam .2mg 530pm and .7mg 1130pm, Premarin .3mg 830PM CARAFATE QID 2/27/19 to 3/5/19

-July 6'19 1/2 10mg Claritin 230pm, stopped it about July 18, started Oct 11 '19, 

-7/27 Viibryd 8.5, 8/29 8.25, 10/24 8.0, 12/19 7.75, Feb '20 7.50, 3/20 7.25, 5/20 7.0, 6/20 6.75, 7/20 6.5, 8/20 6.25, 10/2 20 6.0, 11/25'20 5.75, 1/9/21 5.5, 2/23 5.25

-1015 AM Viibryd, vit D 4,000IU 130, 415 Clonazepam .2mg, 815 Premarin .3mg, 1015 Clonaz .7mg,

  1115 3t fish oil+D 1145 Castor Oil 650mg(4) 1230 Carafate 1/2GM,Methylated B Vit  1/week,Reacted Mag prn

Link to comment
2 hours ago, Rabe said:

 What form of medication are you using to drop?

Thank you, Rabe.  I appreciate your encouraging words.  I'm still comparing my ability to the "old" me, the one that could do things without such limitations - even just being able to vacuum (my most hated job!).  It's good to be reminded that we are all doing as much as we can, whatever our debilitating symptoms are.  I've taken a 1% drop in Escitalopram since Tuesday, making a water suspension and syringing out 0.1ml (10mg Esci, 10 ml water) = 0.1mg drop.  Taking it really slow and low to see how things go - Bubble suggested that people who have probably been so destabilised by changes in drugs and CT may need to go reeeeaaaaalllly slowly.  Of course, I want to rush!

 

You've had a heck of a trail through many drugs too - I haven't heard of many of them.  I hope your taper is going well.

 

Many thanks for popping in - nice to "see" you.

 

Neroli 💜

2006 Citalopram 20mg on and off to 2013.  April 2013 - July 2014  Sertraline, Venlafaxine, Fluoxetine, Mirtazapine v. bad reactions. July 2014 - CT Mirtazapine.  July 2014 - February 2016 Medication free, long term w/d.  February - July 2016 Fluoxetine.  Medication free, long term w/d syndrome.  2017 Jan physical breakdown.

2017 February - March Escitalopram, Nortriptyline instated.  Lorazepam, Zopiclone PRN.  April 2017 Lithium Carbonate 250mg 1 wk. 14 August 2017 finish cross to Diazepam 22.5mg daily, stop Zopiclone

Tapers:

Diazepam 

2017 21 August - 30 Dec 21.25mg to 14.5mg 2018 6 Jan - 11 May to 12mg.  2 June updose to 12.25mg - hold. 2019 (0.5mg cuts) 12 Jan - 28 Dec 12mg to 10mg 2020 (0.25mg cuts) - 25 Jan - 29 Dec 9.75mg to 6.25mg 2021 *May have bungled dose and accidentally took 1mg more for about a month (7.25mg), so 4 Jan started again at 6.5mg; 19 Jan 6.25mg; 1 Feb 6.0mg; 23 Feb 5.75mg; 9 Mar 5.5mg; 23 Mar 5.25mg; 9 Apr 5.0mg; 6 May 4.75mg; 13 May 4.5mg; 6 Jun 4mg; 12 July 3.5mg; 2 sep 3.0mg; 15 Sep 2.5mg; 1 Nov 2mg; 15 Nov 1.5mg; 16 Dec 1mg; 26 Dec 0.5mg; 2022 1 Jan - OFF

Escitalopram - 2022 1 Mar to 9mg; 29 Mar 8mg; 24 May 7mg; 21 Jun 5mg; 19 Jul 4mg; 1 Sep 3mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 31 Oct 1.5mg; 22 Nov 0.5mg; 2023 1 Jan 0.25mg; 1 Mar OFF

Nortriptyline  2018 90mg to 2020 1 Dec down to 72.5mg; 2021 20 May 70mg; 8 Jun 67.5mg; 24 Jun 65mg; 31 July 60mg; 12 Oct 55mg; 23 Oct 50mg; 2022 13 Jan 40mg; 22 Jan 30mg; 29 Mar 20mg; 26 Apr 10mg; 3 Aug 5mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 2023 1 Jan - OFF

 

1 March 2023 - off all drugs - 6-year taper off three drugs.

 

Link to comment

Gosh Neroli...thank you for that. I have been wondering how to taper in a way that I actually could manage.  The weighing seems too much for my brain and I cant take the compounded med in oil right now because of my stomach.  That is really and easy way to calculate things!  So you take out .1ml and drink the rest?

-Nardil 1976 < year, stopped. React to AD's. Klonopin .5BID 1990, 2.5mg til 2016

-Klonopin doubled Jan '16. Taper to 2.25mg May to Nov '16. Bad react to Lexapro, stop. React to Prevacid too, taper off. 

-November '16 Tapered .25mg Klonopin in hospital. Jan '17 started Viibryd, 20mg from Feb to June '17,     

-20mg to 10mg Viibryd from 3/25 to 6/10 2017, 12/15 10% Viibryd taper...back up next day

-Clonazepam 2mg to 1.85mg 4/14 '17 to end November; taper to 1mg Clonazepam in hospital 9/1 tp 9/14 '17

-Feb '18 Amiloride .25mg  5/18 off Amiloride d/t react. Clonaz compounded  

-4/27 '18 Viibryd 9.5mg, 6/11 9.0 mg, 1/27 '19 Viibryd 8.75mg, ; Clonazepam .2mg 530pm and .7mg 1130pm, Premarin .3mg 830PM CARAFATE QID 2/27/19 to 3/5/19

-July 6'19 1/2 10mg Claritin 230pm, stopped it about July 18, started Oct 11 '19, 

-7/27 Viibryd 8.5, 8/29 8.25, 10/24 8.0, 12/19 7.75, Feb '20 7.50, 3/20 7.25, 5/20 7.0, 6/20 6.75, 7/20 6.5, 8/20 6.25, 10/2 20 6.0, 11/25'20 5.75, 1/9/21 5.5, 2/23 5.25

-1015 AM Viibryd, vit D 4,000IU 130, 415 Clonazepam .2mg, 815 Premarin .3mg, 1015 Clonaz .7mg,

  1115 3t fish oil+D 1145 Castor Oil 650mg(4) 1230 Carafate 1/2GM,Methylated B Vit  1/week,Reacted Mag prn

Link to comment
1 hour ago, Rabe said:

So you take out .1ml and drink the rest?

Yes, that's how I'm doing it.  Esci. doesn't make a "stable" suspension in the water (I doubt any of them do and it's not a way to do it for extended release as I understand it), the particles of the tablet settle to the bottom quite quickly after giving it a good shake - so I take the cap off as quick as possible, then pump the mixture up and down a few times into the syringe to get it as mixed as possible.  Take out the 0.1ml and toss it.  Then, shake what's left in the container (I use an empty small pill container) again before drinking and swill a couple of times with water and drink that to get as much of the dose as you can.  It's the easiest way I could think to do it - I didn't think I'd be able to shave off tiny amounts with a razor and jeweller's scales but I think many people do do it that way.

 

I may have to change things around a bit as I go lower but I think that is a bit away in the future.

2006 Citalopram 20mg on and off to 2013.  April 2013 - July 2014  Sertraline, Venlafaxine, Fluoxetine, Mirtazapine v. bad reactions. July 2014 - CT Mirtazapine.  July 2014 - February 2016 Medication free, long term w/d.  February - July 2016 Fluoxetine.  Medication free, long term w/d syndrome.  2017 Jan physical breakdown.

2017 February - March Escitalopram, Nortriptyline instated.  Lorazepam, Zopiclone PRN.  April 2017 Lithium Carbonate 250mg 1 wk. 14 August 2017 finish cross to Diazepam 22.5mg daily, stop Zopiclone

Tapers:

Diazepam 

2017 21 August - 30 Dec 21.25mg to 14.5mg 2018 6 Jan - 11 May to 12mg.  2 June updose to 12.25mg - hold. 2019 (0.5mg cuts) 12 Jan - 28 Dec 12mg to 10mg 2020 (0.25mg cuts) - 25 Jan - 29 Dec 9.75mg to 6.25mg 2021 *May have bungled dose and accidentally took 1mg more for about a month (7.25mg), so 4 Jan started again at 6.5mg; 19 Jan 6.25mg; 1 Feb 6.0mg; 23 Feb 5.75mg; 9 Mar 5.5mg; 23 Mar 5.25mg; 9 Apr 5.0mg; 6 May 4.75mg; 13 May 4.5mg; 6 Jun 4mg; 12 July 3.5mg; 2 sep 3.0mg; 15 Sep 2.5mg; 1 Nov 2mg; 15 Nov 1.5mg; 16 Dec 1mg; 26 Dec 0.5mg; 2022 1 Jan - OFF

Escitalopram - 2022 1 Mar to 9mg; 29 Mar 8mg; 24 May 7mg; 21 Jun 5mg; 19 Jul 4mg; 1 Sep 3mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 31 Oct 1.5mg; 22 Nov 0.5mg; 2023 1 Jan 0.25mg; 1 Mar OFF

Nortriptyline  2018 90mg to 2020 1 Dec down to 72.5mg; 2021 20 May 70mg; 8 Jun 67.5mg; 24 Jun 65mg; 31 July 60mg; 12 Oct 55mg; 23 Oct 50mg; 2022 13 Jan 40mg; 22 Jan 30mg; 29 Mar 20mg; 26 Apr 10mg; 3 Aug 5mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 2023 1 Jan - OFF

 

1 March 2023 - off all drugs - 6-year taper off three drugs.

 

Link to comment

Yes, I have constant hunger sometimes alternating with lack of appetite.  

 

The fact that you can get to work is amazing just as it is.  I hope you sleep well tonight.

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

Link to comment

Hello Rosetta

 

Yes, its like a hollow feeling all the time - not that I want to eat and nothing seems to satiate me anyway.  But you have reminded me that a few weeks ago I was getting nausea and little appetite - not that I want to go back to the nausea but I hope this wave subsides, it's disconcerting.

 

After the ropey way I've been feeling today, I'm amazed that I can get to work - super tired and achy weak legs.  But if I can manage it, I find the distraction helps mainly.

 

I hope you have a good sleep - I find the Nortriptyline knocks me out for a few hours, then at 2 or 3 I wake up suddenly, have to go to the toilet and then it's a lottery if I get back to sleep.

 

Warmest wishes to you

 

Neroli

2006 Citalopram 20mg on and off to 2013.  April 2013 - July 2014  Sertraline, Venlafaxine, Fluoxetine, Mirtazapine v. bad reactions. July 2014 - CT Mirtazapine.  July 2014 - February 2016 Medication free, long term w/d.  February - July 2016 Fluoxetine.  Medication free, long term w/d syndrome.  2017 Jan physical breakdown.

2017 February - March Escitalopram, Nortriptyline instated.  Lorazepam, Zopiclone PRN.  April 2017 Lithium Carbonate 250mg 1 wk. 14 August 2017 finish cross to Diazepam 22.5mg daily, stop Zopiclone

Tapers:

Diazepam 

2017 21 August - 30 Dec 21.25mg to 14.5mg 2018 6 Jan - 11 May to 12mg.  2 June updose to 12.25mg - hold. 2019 (0.5mg cuts) 12 Jan - 28 Dec 12mg to 10mg 2020 (0.25mg cuts) - 25 Jan - 29 Dec 9.75mg to 6.25mg 2021 *May have bungled dose and accidentally took 1mg more for about a month (7.25mg), so 4 Jan started again at 6.5mg; 19 Jan 6.25mg; 1 Feb 6.0mg; 23 Feb 5.75mg; 9 Mar 5.5mg; 23 Mar 5.25mg; 9 Apr 5.0mg; 6 May 4.75mg; 13 May 4.5mg; 6 Jun 4mg; 12 July 3.5mg; 2 sep 3.0mg; 15 Sep 2.5mg; 1 Nov 2mg; 15 Nov 1.5mg; 16 Dec 1mg; 26 Dec 0.5mg; 2022 1 Jan - OFF

Escitalopram - 2022 1 Mar to 9mg; 29 Mar 8mg; 24 May 7mg; 21 Jun 5mg; 19 Jul 4mg; 1 Sep 3mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 31 Oct 1.5mg; 22 Nov 0.5mg; 2023 1 Jan 0.25mg; 1 Mar OFF

Nortriptyline  2018 90mg to 2020 1 Dec down to 72.5mg; 2021 20 May 70mg; 8 Jun 67.5mg; 24 Jun 65mg; 31 July 60mg; 12 Oct 55mg; 23 Oct 50mg; 2022 13 Jan 40mg; 22 Jan 30mg; 29 Mar 20mg; 26 Apr 10mg; 3 Aug 5mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 2023 1 Jan - OFF

 

1 March 2023 - off all drugs - 6-year taper off three drugs.

 

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Hello Moderators

 

I started a 1% cut in Escitalopram on Tuesday 11 September - by Tuesday 18 September I was so fatigued I worried that I wasn't going to have enough leg strength to hold me up, let alone go to work, so I updosed again to 10mg on 18 September.  After a couple of days now, I feel less fatigue, although still very tired, but have experienced more anxiety.

 

That I couldn't handle a 1% cut has been very disappointing for me and has made me feel like I am stuck on these meds. with a very slim chance that I could tolerate the withdrawals and keep my life running even at the baseline it is now (part-time work, eat, sleep, walk when I can, keep hope alive).

 

I guess I should hold for a while, and not fiddle about going down and up and shake my system too much (kindling?).

 

Altostrata has previously suggested I taper the Nortriptyline first (enzyme interactions in the liver, Nortrip affects all three that the meds. 

'compete" for apparently) - but I thought the Escitalopram was the more stimulating one and Nortirptyline is that one that gives me at least some sleep at night.

 

Any ideas of how long to hold?  Do I hold until my weak, wobbly legs have got better (if they do, and if they aren't being made worse by the meds.) - that could be a long wait, it's been a year and a half or more since they've been like this.  

 

And then do I try a 0.25% cut in Escitalopram and see how that goes - I know it makes for a very long taper but at least it would be bringing the drug load down.

 

Any ideas gratefully received.

 

Many thanks

 

Neroli

2006 Citalopram 20mg on and off to 2013.  April 2013 - July 2014  Sertraline, Venlafaxine, Fluoxetine, Mirtazapine v. bad reactions. July 2014 - CT Mirtazapine.  July 2014 - February 2016 Medication free, long term w/d.  February - July 2016 Fluoxetine.  Medication free, long term w/d syndrome.  2017 Jan physical breakdown.

2017 February - March Escitalopram, Nortriptyline instated.  Lorazepam, Zopiclone PRN.  April 2017 Lithium Carbonate 250mg 1 wk. 14 August 2017 finish cross to Diazepam 22.5mg daily, stop Zopiclone

Tapers:

Diazepam 

2017 21 August - 30 Dec 21.25mg to 14.5mg 2018 6 Jan - 11 May to 12mg.  2 June updose to 12.25mg - hold. 2019 (0.5mg cuts) 12 Jan - 28 Dec 12mg to 10mg 2020 (0.25mg cuts) - 25 Jan - 29 Dec 9.75mg to 6.25mg 2021 *May have bungled dose and accidentally took 1mg more for about a month (7.25mg), so 4 Jan started again at 6.5mg; 19 Jan 6.25mg; 1 Feb 6.0mg; 23 Feb 5.75mg; 9 Mar 5.5mg; 23 Mar 5.25mg; 9 Apr 5.0mg; 6 May 4.75mg; 13 May 4.5mg; 6 Jun 4mg; 12 July 3.5mg; 2 sep 3.0mg; 15 Sep 2.5mg; 1 Nov 2mg; 15 Nov 1.5mg; 16 Dec 1mg; 26 Dec 0.5mg; 2022 1 Jan - OFF

Escitalopram - 2022 1 Mar to 9mg; 29 Mar 8mg; 24 May 7mg; 21 Jun 5mg; 19 Jul 4mg; 1 Sep 3mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 31 Oct 1.5mg; 22 Nov 0.5mg; 2023 1 Jan 0.25mg; 1 Mar OFF

Nortriptyline  2018 90mg to 2020 1 Dec down to 72.5mg; 2021 20 May 70mg; 8 Jun 67.5mg; 24 Jun 65mg; 31 July 60mg; 12 Oct 55mg; 23 Oct 50mg; 2022 13 Jan 40mg; 22 Jan 30mg; 29 Mar 20mg; 26 Apr 10mg; 3 Aug 5mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 2023 1 Jan - OFF

 

1 March 2023 - off all drugs - 6-year taper off three drugs.

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus
On 1/7/2018 at 6:00 AM, scallywag said:

This post has a useful format for a daily log:

Take notes of doses and symptoms.

 

Alto finds the daily symptom pattern very helpful when assessing the effects of drugs. So it would be good to post a few days of your symptom pattern to get a batter idea of what's going on.

 

On a general level, the urge to taper can actually be a WD symptom in itself. As well as worry over tapering. So lessening of those is a sign of stabilisation. When out brains get sturdier and more resilient through holding we can cope with larger cuts (unless there are some adverse reactions or interactions involved - symptom pattern indicates at those).

 

When I'm hit by massive symptoms soon after a small cut I know I'm not ready. It is hard to fight the feeling that it will always be like that but tapering is never the same. Distractions are very important. Our brains are healing but they take time and consistency. Doing out best to stay positive, hopeful and doing something to keep out minds from ruminating about process is hard but it pays off.

Hope this helps.

Current: 9/2022 Xanax 0.08, Lexapro 2

2020 Xanax 0.26 (down from 2 mg in 2013), Lexapro 2.85 mg (down from 5 mg 2013)

Amitriptyline (tricyclic AD) and clonazepam for 3 months to treat headache in 1996 
1999. - present Xanax prn up to 3 mg.
2000-2005 Prozac CT twice, 2005-2010 Zoloft CT 3 times, 2010-2013 Escitalopram 10 mg
went from 2.5 to zero on 7 Aug 2013, bad crash 40 days after
reinstated to 5 mg Escitalopram 4Oct 2013 and holding liquid Xanax every 5 hours
28 Jan 2014 Xanax 1.9, 18 Apr  2015 1 mg,  25 June 2015 Lex 4.8, 6 Aug Lexapro 4.6, 1 Jan 2016 0.64  Xanax     9 month hold

24 Sept 2016 4.5 Lex, 17 Oct 4.4 Lex (Nov 0.63 Xanax, Dec 0.625 Xanax), 1 Jan 2017 4.3 Lex, 24 Jan 4.2, 5 Feb 4.1, 24 Mar 4 mg, 10 Apr 3.9 mg, May 3.85, June 3.8, July 3.75, 22 July 3.7, 15 Aug 3.65, 17 Sept 3.6, 1 Jan 2018 3.55, 19 Jan 3.5, 16 Mar 3.4, 14 Apr 3.3, 23 May 3.2, 16 June 3.15, 15 Jul 3.1, 31 Jul 3, 21 Aug 2.9 26 Sept 2.85, 14 Nov Xan 0.61, 1 Dec 0.59, 19 Dec 0.58, 4 Jan 0.565, 6 Feb 0.55, 20 Feb 0.535, 1 Mar 0.505, 10 Mar 0.475, 14 Mar 0.45, 4 Apr 0.415, 13 Apr 0.37, 21 Apr 0.33, 29 Apr 0.29, 10 May 0.27, 17 May 0.25, 28 May 0.22, 19 June 0.22, 21 Jun updose to 0.24, 24 Jun updose to 0.26

Supplements: Omega 3 + Vit E, Vit C, D, magnesium, Taurine, probiotic 

I'm not a medical professional. Any advice I give is based on my own experience and reading. 

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Thank you Bubble.  I'll post symptoms logs in a few days.

 

Best

 

Neroli

2006 Citalopram 20mg on and off to 2013.  April 2013 - July 2014  Sertraline, Venlafaxine, Fluoxetine, Mirtazapine v. bad reactions. July 2014 - CT Mirtazapine.  July 2014 - February 2016 Medication free, long term w/d.  February - July 2016 Fluoxetine.  Medication free, long term w/d syndrome.  2017 Jan physical breakdown.

2017 February - March Escitalopram, Nortriptyline instated.  Lorazepam, Zopiclone PRN.  April 2017 Lithium Carbonate 250mg 1 wk. 14 August 2017 finish cross to Diazepam 22.5mg daily, stop Zopiclone

Tapers:

Diazepam 

2017 21 August - 30 Dec 21.25mg to 14.5mg 2018 6 Jan - 11 May to 12mg.  2 June updose to 12.25mg - hold. 2019 (0.5mg cuts) 12 Jan - 28 Dec 12mg to 10mg 2020 (0.25mg cuts) - 25 Jan - 29 Dec 9.75mg to 6.25mg 2021 *May have bungled dose and accidentally took 1mg more for about a month (7.25mg), so 4 Jan started again at 6.5mg; 19 Jan 6.25mg; 1 Feb 6.0mg; 23 Feb 5.75mg; 9 Mar 5.5mg; 23 Mar 5.25mg; 9 Apr 5.0mg; 6 May 4.75mg; 13 May 4.5mg; 6 Jun 4mg; 12 July 3.5mg; 2 sep 3.0mg; 15 Sep 2.5mg; 1 Nov 2mg; 15 Nov 1.5mg; 16 Dec 1mg; 26 Dec 0.5mg; 2022 1 Jan - OFF

Escitalopram - 2022 1 Mar to 9mg; 29 Mar 8mg; 24 May 7mg; 21 Jun 5mg; 19 Jul 4mg; 1 Sep 3mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 31 Oct 1.5mg; 22 Nov 0.5mg; 2023 1 Jan 0.25mg; 1 Mar OFF

Nortriptyline  2018 90mg to 2020 1 Dec down to 72.5mg; 2021 20 May 70mg; 8 Jun 67.5mg; 24 Jun 65mg; 31 July 60mg; 12 Oct 55mg; 23 Oct 50mg; 2022 13 Jan 40mg; 22 Jan 30mg; 29 Mar 20mg; 26 Apr 10mg; 3 Aug 5mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 2023 1 Jan - OFF

 

1 March 2023 - off all drugs - 6-year taper off three drugs.

 

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I wish I had some idea of what to say to help.  I do think it can take more than 1.5 years to stabilize for some people (and mere months for others).  I can't see any rhyme or reason to the timelines being so disparate for people who struggle a long time and for those who breeze through a short period of symptoms.  I still don't feel stable at 19 months, but I have improved a LOT in the last 4 months.  I'm sure that having three drugs all competing for the same liver processes is not helping you.  Sending you a big hug!

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

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Thinking about you Neroli...and sad you are struggling so right now.  It is hard to feel stuck...like holding isn't doing much but tapering makes it worse.  I do believe it will get better!  Take care!!💜 

-Nardil 1976 < year, stopped. React to AD's. Klonopin .5BID 1990, 2.5mg til 2016

-Klonopin doubled Jan '16. Taper to 2.25mg May to Nov '16. Bad react to Lexapro, stop. React to Prevacid too, taper off. 

-November '16 Tapered .25mg Klonopin in hospital. Jan '17 started Viibryd, 20mg from Feb to June '17,     

-20mg to 10mg Viibryd from 3/25 to 6/10 2017, 12/15 10% Viibryd taper...back up next day

-Clonazepam 2mg to 1.85mg 4/14 '17 to end November; taper to 1mg Clonazepam in hospital 9/1 tp 9/14 '17

-Feb '18 Amiloride .25mg  5/18 off Amiloride d/t react. Clonaz compounded  

-4/27 '18 Viibryd 9.5mg, 6/11 9.0 mg, 1/27 '19 Viibryd 8.75mg, ; Clonazepam .2mg 530pm and .7mg 1130pm, Premarin .3mg 830PM CARAFATE QID 2/27/19 to 3/5/19

-July 6'19 1/2 10mg Claritin 230pm, stopped it about July 18, started Oct 11 '19, 

-7/27 Viibryd 8.5, 8/29 8.25, 10/24 8.0, 12/19 7.75, Feb '20 7.50, 3/20 7.25, 5/20 7.0, 6/20 6.75, 7/20 6.5, 8/20 6.25, 10/2 20 6.0, 11/25'20 5.75, 1/9/21 5.5, 2/23 5.25

-1015 AM Viibryd, vit D 4,000IU 130, 415 Clonazepam .2mg, 815 Premarin .3mg, 1015 Clonaz .7mg,

  1115 3t fish oil+D 1145 Castor Oil 650mg(4) 1230 Carafate 1/2GM,Methylated B Vit  1/week,Reacted Mag prn

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12 hours ago, Rosetta said:

Sending you a big hug!

Hello Rosetta - thank you, a hug is most welcome (this withdrawal/CNS damage process has softened my British reserve and I tend to accept and give hugs more nowadays - is that a benefit of this mess?!).  It used to be a joke at work - I'd say "I'm British, we don't do hugs".  Now I'll almost grab anyone!  Some years ago I read some payshciatrist (Shipko? Glenmullen?) say that once someone had re-instated after de-stabiising he suggested they wait 5 years to stabilise on the new drugs.  So only  time will tell what the heck my system will do.  I'm pleased to have seen your improvements in the past week or two, particularly, sleep getting bit more settled and a reduction in cortisol spikes - lovely news to hear.  You're on the up again.   💜

2006 Citalopram 20mg on and off to 2013.  April 2013 - July 2014  Sertraline, Venlafaxine, Fluoxetine, Mirtazapine v. bad reactions. July 2014 - CT Mirtazapine.  July 2014 - February 2016 Medication free, long term w/d.  February - July 2016 Fluoxetine.  Medication free, long term w/d syndrome.  2017 Jan physical breakdown.

2017 February - March Escitalopram, Nortriptyline instated.  Lorazepam, Zopiclone PRN.  April 2017 Lithium Carbonate 250mg 1 wk. 14 August 2017 finish cross to Diazepam 22.5mg daily, stop Zopiclone

Tapers:

Diazepam 

2017 21 August - 30 Dec 21.25mg to 14.5mg 2018 6 Jan - 11 May to 12mg.  2 June updose to 12.25mg - hold. 2019 (0.5mg cuts) 12 Jan - 28 Dec 12mg to 10mg 2020 (0.25mg cuts) - 25 Jan - 29 Dec 9.75mg to 6.25mg 2021 *May have bungled dose and accidentally took 1mg more for about a month (7.25mg), so 4 Jan started again at 6.5mg; 19 Jan 6.25mg; 1 Feb 6.0mg; 23 Feb 5.75mg; 9 Mar 5.5mg; 23 Mar 5.25mg; 9 Apr 5.0mg; 6 May 4.75mg; 13 May 4.5mg; 6 Jun 4mg; 12 July 3.5mg; 2 sep 3.0mg; 15 Sep 2.5mg; 1 Nov 2mg; 15 Nov 1.5mg; 16 Dec 1mg; 26 Dec 0.5mg; 2022 1 Jan - OFF

Escitalopram - 2022 1 Mar to 9mg; 29 Mar 8mg; 24 May 7mg; 21 Jun 5mg; 19 Jul 4mg; 1 Sep 3mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 31 Oct 1.5mg; 22 Nov 0.5mg; 2023 1 Jan 0.25mg; 1 Mar OFF

Nortriptyline  2018 90mg to 2020 1 Dec down to 72.5mg; 2021 20 May 70mg; 8 Jun 67.5mg; 24 Jun 65mg; 31 July 60mg; 12 Oct 55mg; 23 Oct 50mg; 2022 13 Jan 40mg; 22 Jan 30mg; 29 Mar 20mg; 26 Apr 10mg; 3 Aug 5mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 2023 1 Jan - OFF

 

1 March 2023 - off all drugs - 6-year taper off three drugs.

 

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7 hours ago, Rabe said:

It is hard to feel stuck...like holding isn't doing much but tapering makes it worse.  I do believe it will get better!  

 

Hello Rabe

 

It's so danged hard to know which way to turn isn't it?  That's why it's great there are moderators on here who have the experience to be able to suggest the way to go.  Bubble has been generous with her experience and knowledge, she did a long hold and says long holds have always been of benefit.  My system is probably all knotted up with all the dragging that's been going on - even stuff I thought was innocuous when I was going through the long-term WD from a cold turkey in 2014, after being slammed to my knees with a trip through Fluoxetine, Sertraline, Effexor and Mirtazapine - I tried Chinese herbs, tart cherry, unisom, melatonin for sleep, and tried prescribed oxybutinin for constant urination (made me feel awful), then I tried re-instating on fluoxetine in 2016 and felt dreadful for four months so did a fast (Dr. guided) taper from that - then after the crash was put on escitalopram, Benzos PRN which then swapped to valium at regular dose times, got nortriptyline added to the mix and then was tried on Lithium (horrific insomnia and dried out like a raisin).  So there's been a fair bit of faffing around - not an unusual story, unfortunately., as you know.  Thanks for the encouragement to believe it will get better.

 

All the best to you, too

 

Neroli 💜 

 

 

2006 Citalopram 20mg on and off to 2013.  April 2013 - July 2014  Sertraline, Venlafaxine, Fluoxetine, Mirtazapine v. bad reactions. July 2014 - CT Mirtazapine.  July 2014 - February 2016 Medication free, long term w/d.  February - July 2016 Fluoxetine.  Medication free, long term w/d syndrome.  2017 Jan physical breakdown.

2017 February - March Escitalopram, Nortriptyline instated.  Lorazepam, Zopiclone PRN.  April 2017 Lithium Carbonate 250mg 1 wk. 14 August 2017 finish cross to Diazepam 22.5mg daily, stop Zopiclone

Tapers:

Diazepam 

2017 21 August - 30 Dec 21.25mg to 14.5mg 2018 6 Jan - 11 May to 12mg.  2 June updose to 12.25mg - hold. 2019 (0.5mg cuts) 12 Jan - 28 Dec 12mg to 10mg 2020 (0.25mg cuts) - 25 Jan - 29 Dec 9.75mg to 6.25mg 2021 *May have bungled dose and accidentally took 1mg more for about a month (7.25mg), so 4 Jan started again at 6.5mg; 19 Jan 6.25mg; 1 Feb 6.0mg; 23 Feb 5.75mg; 9 Mar 5.5mg; 23 Mar 5.25mg; 9 Apr 5.0mg; 6 May 4.75mg; 13 May 4.5mg; 6 Jun 4mg; 12 July 3.5mg; 2 sep 3.0mg; 15 Sep 2.5mg; 1 Nov 2mg; 15 Nov 1.5mg; 16 Dec 1mg; 26 Dec 0.5mg; 2022 1 Jan - OFF

Escitalopram - 2022 1 Mar to 9mg; 29 Mar 8mg; 24 May 7mg; 21 Jun 5mg; 19 Jul 4mg; 1 Sep 3mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 31 Oct 1.5mg; 22 Nov 0.5mg; 2023 1 Jan 0.25mg; 1 Mar OFF

Nortriptyline  2018 90mg to 2020 1 Dec down to 72.5mg; 2021 20 May 70mg; 8 Jun 67.5mg; 24 Jun 65mg; 31 July 60mg; 12 Oct 55mg; 23 Oct 50mg; 2022 13 Jan 40mg; 22 Jan 30mg; 29 Mar 20mg; 26 Apr 10mg; 3 Aug 5mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 2023 1 Jan - OFF

 

1 March 2023 - off all drugs - 6-year taper off three drugs.

 

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Oh Neroli, it is awful that the doctors just keep thinking more meds is the answer!   Im so sorry!  Yes...I think the holds are a good thing though I would so wished to be off all this...today is ok so far so am grateful for that.  Just having an ok day now and then is a blessing.  Thinking about you!!!💜

-Nardil 1976 < year, stopped. React to AD's. Klonopin .5BID 1990, 2.5mg til 2016

-Klonopin doubled Jan '16. Taper to 2.25mg May to Nov '16. Bad react to Lexapro, stop. React to Prevacid too, taper off. 

-November '16 Tapered .25mg Klonopin in hospital. Jan '17 started Viibryd, 20mg from Feb to June '17,     

-20mg to 10mg Viibryd from 3/25 to 6/10 2017, 12/15 10% Viibryd taper...back up next day

-Clonazepam 2mg to 1.85mg 4/14 '17 to end November; taper to 1mg Clonazepam in hospital 9/1 tp 9/14 '17

-Feb '18 Amiloride .25mg  5/18 off Amiloride d/t react. Clonaz compounded  

-4/27 '18 Viibryd 9.5mg, 6/11 9.0 mg, 1/27 '19 Viibryd 8.75mg, ; Clonazepam .2mg 530pm and .7mg 1130pm, Premarin .3mg 830PM CARAFATE QID 2/27/19 to 3/5/19

-July 6'19 1/2 10mg Claritin 230pm, stopped it about July 18, started Oct 11 '19, 

-7/27 Viibryd 8.5, 8/29 8.25, 10/24 8.0, 12/19 7.75, Feb '20 7.50, 3/20 7.25, 5/20 7.0, 6/20 6.75, 7/20 6.5, 8/20 6.25, 10/2 20 6.0, 11/25'20 5.75, 1/9/21 5.5, 2/23 5.25

-1015 AM Viibryd, vit D 4,000IU 130, 415 Clonazepam .2mg, 815 Premarin .3mg, 1015 Clonaz .7mg,

  1115 3t fish oil+D 1145 Castor Oil 650mg(4) 1230 Carafate 1/2GM,Methylated B Vit  1/week,Reacted Mag prn

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Thank you, Rabe.  It's lovely to have an ok day now and then - some relief from the array of symptoms, a time to rest an embattled body a bit and to be able to enjoy that rest.  Wishing you many more.

 

Neroli 💜

2006 Citalopram 20mg on and off to 2013.  April 2013 - July 2014  Sertraline, Venlafaxine, Fluoxetine, Mirtazapine v. bad reactions. July 2014 - CT Mirtazapine.  July 2014 - February 2016 Medication free, long term w/d.  February - July 2016 Fluoxetine.  Medication free, long term w/d syndrome.  2017 Jan physical breakdown.

2017 February - March Escitalopram, Nortriptyline instated.  Lorazepam, Zopiclone PRN.  April 2017 Lithium Carbonate 250mg 1 wk. 14 August 2017 finish cross to Diazepam 22.5mg daily, stop Zopiclone

Tapers:

Diazepam 

2017 21 August - 30 Dec 21.25mg to 14.5mg 2018 6 Jan - 11 May to 12mg.  2 June updose to 12.25mg - hold. 2019 (0.5mg cuts) 12 Jan - 28 Dec 12mg to 10mg 2020 (0.25mg cuts) - 25 Jan - 29 Dec 9.75mg to 6.25mg 2021 *May have bungled dose and accidentally took 1mg more for about a month (7.25mg), so 4 Jan started again at 6.5mg; 19 Jan 6.25mg; 1 Feb 6.0mg; 23 Feb 5.75mg; 9 Mar 5.5mg; 23 Mar 5.25mg; 9 Apr 5.0mg; 6 May 4.75mg; 13 May 4.5mg; 6 Jun 4mg; 12 July 3.5mg; 2 sep 3.0mg; 15 Sep 2.5mg; 1 Nov 2mg; 15 Nov 1.5mg; 16 Dec 1mg; 26 Dec 0.5mg; 2022 1 Jan - OFF

Escitalopram - 2022 1 Mar to 9mg; 29 Mar 8mg; 24 May 7mg; 21 Jun 5mg; 19 Jul 4mg; 1 Sep 3mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 31 Oct 1.5mg; 22 Nov 0.5mg; 2023 1 Jan 0.25mg; 1 Mar OFF

Nortriptyline  2018 90mg to 2020 1 Dec down to 72.5mg; 2021 20 May 70mg; 8 Jun 67.5mg; 24 Jun 65mg; 31 July 60mg; 12 Oct 55mg; 23 Oct 50mg; 2022 13 Jan 40mg; 22 Jan 30mg; 29 Mar 20mg; 26 Apr 10mg; 3 Aug 5mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 2023 1 Jan - OFF

 

1 March 2023 - off all drugs - 6-year taper off three drugs.

 

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Symptom log

 

Saturday 22 September - will put ratings in (0-10 (10 being the worst)) for some symptoms

 

3.30am wake, toilet, go back to sleep

5.30 wake, anxious feeling, slightly burning skin

5.45 shower, shakes (6), lea legs/stiff muscles, tired (6)

6.00 4.25mg Diaz, cup of tea

7.00 Breakfast

7.15 grocery shopping, shaky, stiff legs, hungry, tired, anxious

8.30 10mg Esci.

8.45 slight drop in mood, rise of anxiousness (?) seems to be a spike

9.00 Banana, 9.15 Hungry, "nervy", sight shakes, slight anxiety

Throughout the day, seeing about every half hour.

10.00 underlying anxiety

10.45 15 mins spraying hedges - shakier after, hungry

11.00 4mg Diaz

12.00 Lunch

1.00 Hungry, tired, weeing

3.00 "quivery" (milder from of shakes).  Snack, cup of tea.

4.00 4mg Diaz

4.30 gentle yoga stretch half-hour - trembly after, legs heavy and tired, me tired (6)

6.00 Dinner

7.00 Netflix - hungry, weeing

8.40 90 mg Nortrip

8.55 settle to sleep

 

2006 Citalopram 20mg on and off to 2013.  April 2013 - July 2014  Sertraline, Venlafaxine, Fluoxetine, Mirtazapine v. bad reactions. July 2014 - CT Mirtazapine.  July 2014 - February 2016 Medication free, long term w/d.  February - July 2016 Fluoxetine.  Medication free, long term w/d syndrome.  2017 Jan physical breakdown.

2017 February - March Escitalopram, Nortriptyline instated.  Lorazepam, Zopiclone PRN.  April 2017 Lithium Carbonate 250mg 1 wk. 14 August 2017 finish cross to Diazepam 22.5mg daily, stop Zopiclone

Tapers:

Diazepam 

2017 21 August - 30 Dec 21.25mg to 14.5mg 2018 6 Jan - 11 May to 12mg.  2 June updose to 12.25mg - hold. 2019 (0.5mg cuts) 12 Jan - 28 Dec 12mg to 10mg 2020 (0.25mg cuts) - 25 Jan - 29 Dec 9.75mg to 6.25mg 2021 *May have bungled dose and accidentally took 1mg more for about a month (7.25mg), so 4 Jan started again at 6.5mg; 19 Jan 6.25mg; 1 Feb 6.0mg; 23 Feb 5.75mg; 9 Mar 5.5mg; 23 Mar 5.25mg; 9 Apr 5.0mg; 6 May 4.75mg; 13 May 4.5mg; 6 Jun 4mg; 12 July 3.5mg; 2 sep 3.0mg; 15 Sep 2.5mg; 1 Nov 2mg; 15 Nov 1.5mg; 16 Dec 1mg; 26 Dec 0.5mg; 2022 1 Jan - OFF

Escitalopram - 2022 1 Mar to 9mg; 29 Mar 8mg; 24 May 7mg; 21 Jun 5mg; 19 Jul 4mg; 1 Sep 3mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 31 Oct 1.5mg; 22 Nov 0.5mg; 2023 1 Jan 0.25mg; 1 Mar OFF

Nortriptyline  2018 90mg to 2020 1 Dec down to 72.5mg; 2021 20 May 70mg; 8 Jun 67.5mg; 24 Jun 65mg; 31 July 60mg; 12 Oct 55mg; 23 Oct 50mg; 2022 13 Jan 40mg; 22 Jan 30mg; 29 Mar 20mg; 26 Apr 10mg; 3 Aug 5mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 2023 1 Jan - OFF

 

1 March 2023 - off all drugs - 6-year taper off three drugs.

 

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Sunday 23 September - will put ratings in (0-10 (10 being the worst)) for some symptoms

 

3.00am wake, toilet

4.30 wake, anxious - listen to soothing talk and try to doze

5.45 shower, shakes (4) , lead legs, aches from yoga, tired (5)

6.00 4.25mg Diaz, cup of tea

7.00 Breakfast, shakes (4)

8.00 Hungry/nausea?, frequent weeing

8.30 10mg Esci.

9.00 Banana, v. apathetic (6), v. tired (6), woozy (4)

11.00 4mg Diaz

Hungry/nausea/acid stomach?, woozy

12.00 Lunch

Hungry/nausea/acid stomach? (take small dose of bicarb), woozy, low level anxiety

weeing lessens

2.30 1 hr walk, flat ground - shaky (5), tight leg muscles (8)

3.30 snack, cup of tea

4.00 4mg Diaz

4.30 shakes die down, legs less tight (6)

Hungry feeling has lessened (1) 

6.00 dinner - nausea? ( I can't tell what the feeling is sometimes)

7.00 Netflix, emails - hungry feeling (5), weeing (3)

8.40 90mg Nortriptyline

8.55 settle to sleep

2006 Citalopram 20mg on and off to 2013.  April 2013 - July 2014  Sertraline, Venlafaxine, Fluoxetine, Mirtazapine v. bad reactions. July 2014 - CT Mirtazapine.  July 2014 - February 2016 Medication free, long term w/d.  February - July 2016 Fluoxetine.  Medication free, long term w/d syndrome.  2017 Jan physical breakdown.

2017 February - March Escitalopram, Nortriptyline instated.  Lorazepam, Zopiclone PRN.  April 2017 Lithium Carbonate 250mg 1 wk. 14 August 2017 finish cross to Diazepam 22.5mg daily, stop Zopiclone

Tapers:

Diazepam 

2017 21 August - 30 Dec 21.25mg to 14.5mg 2018 6 Jan - 11 May to 12mg.  2 June updose to 12.25mg - hold. 2019 (0.5mg cuts) 12 Jan - 28 Dec 12mg to 10mg 2020 (0.25mg cuts) - 25 Jan - 29 Dec 9.75mg to 6.25mg 2021 *May have bungled dose and accidentally took 1mg more for about a month (7.25mg), so 4 Jan started again at 6.5mg; 19 Jan 6.25mg; 1 Feb 6.0mg; 23 Feb 5.75mg; 9 Mar 5.5mg; 23 Mar 5.25mg; 9 Apr 5.0mg; 6 May 4.75mg; 13 May 4.5mg; 6 Jun 4mg; 12 July 3.5mg; 2 sep 3.0mg; 15 Sep 2.5mg; 1 Nov 2mg; 15 Nov 1.5mg; 16 Dec 1mg; 26 Dec 0.5mg; 2022 1 Jan - OFF

Escitalopram - 2022 1 Mar to 9mg; 29 Mar 8mg; 24 May 7mg; 21 Jun 5mg; 19 Jul 4mg; 1 Sep 3mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 31 Oct 1.5mg; 22 Nov 0.5mg; 2023 1 Jan 0.25mg; 1 Mar OFF

Nortriptyline  2018 90mg to 2020 1 Dec down to 72.5mg; 2021 20 May 70mg; 8 Jun 67.5mg; 24 Jun 65mg; 31 July 60mg; 12 Oct 55mg; 23 Oct 50mg; 2022 13 Jan 40mg; 22 Jan 30mg; 29 Mar 20mg; 26 Apr 10mg; 3 Aug 5mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 2023 1 Jan - OFF

 

1 March 2023 - off all drugs - 6-year taper off three drugs.

 

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Monday 24 September - will put ratings in (0-10 (10 being the worst)) for some symptoms

 

2.30am wake, toilet

4.30 wake, try to doze to soothing talks, anxiousness, slightly burning skin

5.45 shower, shakes (5), lead legs (6), tired (5)

6.00 4.25mg Diaz, cup of tea

7.00 Breakfast, nausea/hunger? afterwards

7.45 set off for work, shakes, lead legs, tired (as above), woozy (3)

8.30 10 mg Esci

8.45 hunger/nausea? low-level anxiety

9.30 snack, hungry after

10.15 Hungry, low-level anxiety, shaky (2), tired (6)

11.10 4mg Diaz

12.00 lunch- hungry after, legs heavy, low-level anxiety, legs stiff (6), tired (6) , shakes have calmed down

3.00 snack

4.00 4mg Diaz

leave work, tired (8) fall asleep on train, legs heavy (7), nausea (4)

6.00 dinner

7.00 Netflix, emails, hungry feeling, increased need to wee

Hollow hungry feeling, pretty depressed about how awful I've felt today

8.40 90mg Nortrip

8.55 settle to sleep

2006 Citalopram 20mg on and off to 2013.  April 2013 - July 2014  Sertraline, Venlafaxine, Fluoxetine, Mirtazapine v. bad reactions. July 2014 - CT Mirtazapine.  July 2014 - February 2016 Medication free, long term w/d.  February - July 2016 Fluoxetine.  Medication free, long term w/d syndrome.  2017 Jan physical breakdown.

2017 February - March Escitalopram, Nortriptyline instated.  Lorazepam, Zopiclone PRN.  April 2017 Lithium Carbonate 250mg 1 wk. 14 August 2017 finish cross to Diazepam 22.5mg daily, stop Zopiclone

Tapers:

Diazepam 

2017 21 August - 30 Dec 21.25mg to 14.5mg 2018 6 Jan - 11 May to 12mg.  2 June updose to 12.25mg - hold. 2019 (0.5mg cuts) 12 Jan - 28 Dec 12mg to 10mg 2020 (0.25mg cuts) - 25 Jan - 29 Dec 9.75mg to 6.25mg 2021 *May have bungled dose and accidentally took 1mg more for about a month (7.25mg), so 4 Jan started again at 6.5mg; 19 Jan 6.25mg; 1 Feb 6.0mg; 23 Feb 5.75mg; 9 Mar 5.5mg; 23 Mar 5.25mg; 9 Apr 5.0mg; 6 May 4.75mg; 13 May 4.5mg; 6 Jun 4mg; 12 July 3.5mg; 2 sep 3.0mg; 15 Sep 2.5mg; 1 Nov 2mg; 15 Nov 1.5mg; 16 Dec 1mg; 26 Dec 0.5mg; 2022 1 Jan - OFF

Escitalopram - 2022 1 Mar to 9mg; 29 Mar 8mg; 24 May 7mg; 21 Jun 5mg; 19 Jul 4mg; 1 Sep 3mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 31 Oct 1.5mg; 22 Nov 0.5mg; 2023 1 Jan 0.25mg; 1 Mar OFF

Nortriptyline  2018 90mg to 2020 1 Dec down to 72.5mg; 2021 20 May 70mg; 8 Jun 67.5mg; 24 Jun 65mg; 31 July 60mg; 12 Oct 55mg; 23 Oct 50mg; 2022 13 Jan 40mg; 22 Jan 30mg; 29 Mar 20mg; 26 Apr 10mg; 3 Aug 5mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 2023 1 Jan - OFF

 

1 March 2023 - off all drugs - 6-year taper off three drugs.

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Thank you for the symptoms log. One more question: how were you doing throughout your Diazepam taper that started in august 2017? you have slowly decreased from 22.5 mg to 12 when you started experience trouble which led you to updose. Was it then that the worsening in symptoms you are describing started?

 

In this period since the updose on 2 June you attempted a small decrease on Lexapro and that made you feel even worse? Is that correct? 

 

4 months may seem long but if our nervous system took a beating it just needs as long as it takes to recover.

Current: 9/2022 Xanax 0.08, Lexapro 2

2020 Xanax 0.26 (down from 2 mg in 2013), Lexapro 2.85 mg (down from 5 mg 2013)

Amitriptyline (tricyclic AD) and clonazepam for 3 months to treat headache in 1996 
1999. - present Xanax prn up to 3 mg.
2000-2005 Prozac CT twice, 2005-2010 Zoloft CT 3 times, 2010-2013 Escitalopram 10 mg
went from 2.5 to zero on 7 Aug 2013, bad crash 40 days after
reinstated to 5 mg Escitalopram 4Oct 2013 and holding liquid Xanax every 5 hours
28 Jan 2014 Xanax 1.9, 18 Apr  2015 1 mg,  25 June 2015 Lex 4.8, 6 Aug Lexapro 4.6, 1 Jan 2016 0.64  Xanax     9 month hold

24 Sept 2016 4.5 Lex, 17 Oct 4.4 Lex (Nov 0.63 Xanax, Dec 0.625 Xanax), 1 Jan 2017 4.3 Lex, 24 Jan 4.2, 5 Feb 4.1, 24 Mar 4 mg, 10 Apr 3.9 mg, May 3.85, June 3.8, July 3.75, 22 July 3.7, 15 Aug 3.65, 17 Sept 3.6, 1 Jan 2018 3.55, 19 Jan 3.5, 16 Mar 3.4, 14 Apr 3.3, 23 May 3.2, 16 June 3.15, 15 Jul 3.1, 31 Jul 3, 21 Aug 2.9 26 Sept 2.85, 14 Nov Xan 0.61, 1 Dec 0.59, 19 Dec 0.58, 4 Jan 0.565, 6 Feb 0.55, 20 Feb 0.535, 1 Mar 0.505, 10 Mar 0.475, 14 Mar 0.45, 4 Apr 0.415, 13 Apr 0.37, 21 Apr 0.33, 29 Apr 0.29, 10 May 0.27, 17 May 0.25, 28 May 0.22, 19 June 0.22, 21 Jun updose to 0.24, 24 Jun updose to 0.26

Supplements: Omega 3 + Vit E, Vit C, D, magnesium, Taurine, probiotic 

I'm not a medical professional. Any advice I give is based on my own experience and reading. 

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  • Administrator
On 7/23/2018 at 3:56 PM, Altostrata said:

In early May, you reduced diazepam. That may have triggered the heart palpitations. Or, it could be diazepam-escitalopram interaction.

 

The introduction of diazepam brought in another aspect of drug interactions. They compete for liver enzymes in order to be metabolized:

 

diazepam 3A4

escitalopram 3A4, 2C19; inhibits 2D6

nortriptyline 3A4, 2C19, 2D6, 1A2; inhibits 2D6

 

You have a traffic jam in your liver for enzymes 3A4 (all 3 drugs), 2C19 (escilatopram, nortriptyline), 2D6 (escilatopram, nortriptyline).

 

This means that any of these drugs can be backing up and causing symptoms, but the nortriptyline is causing the most problems because of its interaction with the other 2 drugs. Why are you taking nortriptyline?

 

I think you need to make your diazepam dosing more regular, also take it apart from escilatopram by at least a couple of hours so we can tell if either drug is causing your symptoms. It looks like you need to take the nortriptyline apart from diazepam, too. Please post in your Benzo topic Neroli: Could this be withdrawal symptoms to discuss changing your diazepam schedule.

 

Hi, Neroli.

 

My feeling is your symptoms are caused by the combination of drugs, particularly all that diazepam.

 

What I'm thinking is you might hold on the benzo and escilatopram tapering and start reducing nortriptyline, which may be the lynchpin to the drug-drug interaction, causing an overload of diazepam.

 

If this affects your sleep, we might move a little diazepam into the evening. What do you think?

 

 

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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@bubble - Thank you for posting.  To answer your query about how I was during the benzo taper before I updated a little in June, I wrote to Shep: "I thought the hold on the Diaz would normalise me a bit, since I seemed to experience bouts of depression and hopelessness in the taper periods.  But in this three week hold, I've had a few bouts of deep depression and gut-wrenching sobbing, as well as weaker feeling legs and wooziness.  At times it's felt like I wouldn't be able to get home my legs have been so wobbly.  And there's an increase in tremor/shaking.  My walks have got shorter as the legs have less energy."

 

And while I don't remember exactly how deep the symptoms were, because I didn't rate them then, I think they were slightly worse than what I'm experiencing now.  Still getting bouts of depression and some SI, hopelessness and the legs feel like they ease up sometimes then come back to being very stiff and heavy.  The weepiness has eased a little.

 

Yes, since the updose in June, I tried one week (starting on 11 September) to decrease of 0.1mg Escitalopram - and I felt much worse, heavy fatigue which made my legs even more wobbly.  I don't know if I was hyper-vigilant and imagined it was worse, or whether it was because I'd had a stressful week and that added to the mix, but I did feel so very fatigued.  And now of course, scared to try again and thinking my system is so messed up it can't take the cuts.  It has had quite a beating in the last four/five years.

 

I appreciate your response, many thanks

 

Neroli

2006 Citalopram 20mg on and off to 2013.  April 2013 - July 2014  Sertraline, Venlafaxine, Fluoxetine, Mirtazapine v. bad reactions. July 2014 - CT Mirtazapine.  July 2014 - February 2016 Medication free, long term w/d.  February - July 2016 Fluoxetine.  Medication free, long term w/d syndrome.  2017 Jan physical breakdown.

2017 February - March Escitalopram, Nortriptyline instated.  Lorazepam, Zopiclone PRN.  April 2017 Lithium Carbonate 250mg 1 wk. 14 August 2017 finish cross to Diazepam 22.5mg daily, stop Zopiclone

Tapers:

Diazepam 

2017 21 August - 30 Dec 21.25mg to 14.5mg 2018 6 Jan - 11 May to 12mg.  2 June updose to 12.25mg - hold. 2019 (0.5mg cuts) 12 Jan - 28 Dec 12mg to 10mg 2020 (0.25mg cuts) - 25 Jan - 29 Dec 9.75mg to 6.25mg 2021 *May have bungled dose and accidentally took 1mg more for about a month (7.25mg), so 4 Jan started again at 6.5mg; 19 Jan 6.25mg; 1 Feb 6.0mg; 23 Feb 5.75mg; 9 Mar 5.5mg; 23 Mar 5.25mg; 9 Apr 5.0mg; 6 May 4.75mg; 13 May 4.5mg; 6 Jun 4mg; 12 July 3.5mg; 2 sep 3.0mg; 15 Sep 2.5mg; 1 Nov 2mg; 15 Nov 1.5mg; 16 Dec 1mg; 26 Dec 0.5mg; 2022 1 Jan - OFF

Escitalopram - 2022 1 Mar to 9mg; 29 Mar 8mg; 24 May 7mg; 21 Jun 5mg; 19 Jul 4mg; 1 Sep 3mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 31 Oct 1.5mg; 22 Nov 0.5mg; 2023 1 Jan 0.25mg; 1 Mar OFF

Nortriptyline  2018 90mg to 2020 1 Dec down to 72.5mg; 2021 20 May 70mg; 8 Jun 67.5mg; 24 Jun 65mg; 31 July 60mg; 12 Oct 55mg; 23 Oct 50mg; 2022 13 Jan 40mg; 22 Jan 30mg; 29 Mar 20mg; 26 Apr 10mg; 3 Aug 5mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 2023 1 Jan - OFF

 

1 March 2023 - off all drugs - 6-year taper off three drugs.

 

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11 hours ago, Altostrata said:

start reducing nortriptyline, which may be the lynchpin to the drug-drug interaction, causing an overload of diazepam.

 

If this affects your sleep, we might move a little diazepam into the evening. What do you think?

Hello Altostrata, thanks for commenting.You have more experience of the drug interactions than I do, so I can only go on what you have considered may be causing symptoms due to "an overload of diazepam".  To be honest I don't know which way to turn, to hold on all of them in case my nervous system is so messed up it needs time to recuperate a bit, or to try another small taper.  I am bamboozled as I have been reading various opinions of how to/what to reduce first (some say get off the benzo first, though I know many support groups, including SA, say do the benzo last).  Then somebody pipes up (not on SA) about the benzo having gone "paradoxical" on them and I'm thrown again.

 

I admit, I tried the Esci. taper because I was concerned that doing the Nortriptyline may upset the sleep that I do get.  I'm open to having a go.  But I will hold where I am for another couple of weeks, this coming weekend the clocks go forward for summer time and I do seem to get a wobble from that, so I'll let my system settle down and then consider the Nortrip taper.  Moving the diaz a little closer to the evening may help but I remember I took 10mg at night some time ago and it did nothing to help me sleep.  With the change in the clocks I am going to get the last diaz dose to 5pm - which gives a substantial space before the Nortrip. dose in the evening.

 

So, maybe in a couple of weeks, a test of the Nortrip. by reducing, say, 1%?

 

I appreciate your input, thank you - I know you are busy helping a number of people on the site.

 

Neroli

2006 Citalopram 20mg on and off to 2013.  April 2013 - July 2014  Sertraline, Venlafaxine, Fluoxetine, Mirtazapine v. bad reactions. July 2014 - CT Mirtazapine.  July 2014 - February 2016 Medication free, long term w/d.  February - July 2016 Fluoxetine.  Medication free, long term w/d syndrome.  2017 Jan physical breakdown.

2017 February - March Escitalopram, Nortriptyline instated.  Lorazepam, Zopiclone PRN.  April 2017 Lithium Carbonate 250mg 1 wk. 14 August 2017 finish cross to Diazepam 22.5mg daily, stop Zopiclone

Tapers:

Diazepam 

2017 21 August - 30 Dec 21.25mg to 14.5mg 2018 6 Jan - 11 May to 12mg.  2 June updose to 12.25mg - hold. 2019 (0.5mg cuts) 12 Jan - 28 Dec 12mg to 10mg 2020 (0.25mg cuts) - 25 Jan - 29 Dec 9.75mg to 6.25mg 2021 *May have bungled dose and accidentally took 1mg more for about a month (7.25mg), so 4 Jan started again at 6.5mg; 19 Jan 6.25mg; 1 Feb 6.0mg; 23 Feb 5.75mg; 9 Mar 5.5mg; 23 Mar 5.25mg; 9 Apr 5.0mg; 6 May 4.75mg; 13 May 4.5mg; 6 Jun 4mg; 12 July 3.5mg; 2 sep 3.0mg; 15 Sep 2.5mg; 1 Nov 2mg; 15 Nov 1.5mg; 16 Dec 1mg; 26 Dec 0.5mg; 2022 1 Jan - OFF

Escitalopram - 2022 1 Mar to 9mg; 29 Mar 8mg; 24 May 7mg; 21 Jun 5mg; 19 Jul 4mg; 1 Sep 3mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 31 Oct 1.5mg; 22 Nov 0.5mg; 2023 1 Jan 0.25mg; 1 Mar OFF

Nortriptyline  2018 90mg to 2020 1 Dec down to 72.5mg; 2021 20 May 70mg; 8 Jun 67.5mg; 24 Jun 65mg; 31 July 60mg; 12 Oct 55mg; 23 Oct 50mg; 2022 13 Jan 40mg; 22 Jan 30mg; 29 Mar 20mg; 26 Apr 10mg; 3 Aug 5mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 2023 1 Jan - OFF

 

1 March 2023 - off all drugs - 6-year taper off three drugs.

 

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  • Moderator Emeritus
27 minutes ago, neroli said:

So, maybe in a couple of weeks, a test of the Nortrip. by reducing, say, 1%?

 

I'm happy Alto worked some of her magic for you! I think we have a plan. Such a cautious cut can't cause too much wobbliness but might point at a direction you need to take. 

Current: 9/2022 Xanax 0.08, Lexapro 2

2020 Xanax 0.26 (down from 2 mg in 2013), Lexapro 2.85 mg (down from 5 mg 2013)

Amitriptyline (tricyclic AD) and clonazepam for 3 months to treat headache in 1996 
1999. - present Xanax prn up to 3 mg.
2000-2005 Prozac CT twice, 2005-2010 Zoloft CT 3 times, 2010-2013 Escitalopram 10 mg
went from 2.5 to zero on 7 Aug 2013, bad crash 40 days after
reinstated to 5 mg Escitalopram 4Oct 2013 and holding liquid Xanax every 5 hours
28 Jan 2014 Xanax 1.9, 18 Apr  2015 1 mg,  25 June 2015 Lex 4.8, 6 Aug Lexapro 4.6, 1 Jan 2016 0.64  Xanax     9 month hold

24 Sept 2016 4.5 Lex, 17 Oct 4.4 Lex (Nov 0.63 Xanax, Dec 0.625 Xanax), 1 Jan 2017 4.3 Lex, 24 Jan 4.2, 5 Feb 4.1, 24 Mar 4 mg, 10 Apr 3.9 mg, May 3.85, June 3.8, July 3.75, 22 July 3.7, 15 Aug 3.65, 17 Sept 3.6, 1 Jan 2018 3.55, 19 Jan 3.5, 16 Mar 3.4, 14 Apr 3.3, 23 May 3.2, 16 June 3.15, 15 Jul 3.1, 31 Jul 3, 21 Aug 2.9 26 Sept 2.85, 14 Nov Xan 0.61, 1 Dec 0.59, 19 Dec 0.58, 4 Jan 0.565, 6 Feb 0.55, 20 Feb 0.535, 1 Mar 0.505, 10 Mar 0.475, 14 Mar 0.45, 4 Apr 0.415, 13 Apr 0.37, 21 Apr 0.33, 29 Apr 0.29, 10 May 0.27, 17 May 0.25, 28 May 0.22, 19 June 0.22, 21 Jun updose to 0.24, 24 Jun updose to 0.26

Supplements: Omega 3 + Vit E, Vit C, D, magnesium, Taurine, probiotic 

I'm not a medical professional. Any advice I give is based on my own experience and reading. 

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22 hours ago, bubble said:

I'm happy Alto worked some of her magic for you! I think we have a plan. Such a cautious cut can't cause too much wobbliness but might point at a direction you need to take. 

Thank you, Bubble.  I do hope this is a direction and that this will be a cut that won't cause too much wobbliness.  I'd sooooo love it if it resolved some of the leg issues.  But mustn't get ahead of myself.  I realise that other people have their own set of draining symptoms to deal with - so while I see my legs as a major problem, there are others who are not able to do even the bit that I do.  

 

Thanks for your help, I'll check from time to time and may post more symptom diaries, just for my own record, before I embark on a cut.

 

Wishing you all the best

 

Neroli

2006 Citalopram 20mg on and off to 2013.  April 2013 - July 2014  Sertraline, Venlafaxine, Fluoxetine, Mirtazapine v. bad reactions. July 2014 - CT Mirtazapine.  July 2014 - February 2016 Medication free, long term w/d.  February - July 2016 Fluoxetine.  Medication free, long term w/d syndrome.  2017 Jan physical breakdown.

2017 February - March Escitalopram, Nortriptyline instated.  Lorazepam, Zopiclone PRN.  April 2017 Lithium Carbonate 250mg 1 wk. 14 August 2017 finish cross to Diazepam 22.5mg daily, stop Zopiclone

Tapers:

Diazepam 

2017 21 August - 30 Dec 21.25mg to 14.5mg 2018 6 Jan - 11 May to 12mg.  2 June updose to 12.25mg - hold. 2019 (0.5mg cuts) 12 Jan - 28 Dec 12mg to 10mg 2020 (0.25mg cuts) - 25 Jan - 29 Dec 9.75mg to 6.25mg 2021 *May have bungled dose and accidentally took 1mg more for about a month (7.25mg), so 4 Jan started again at 6.5mg; 19 Jan 6.25mg; 1 Feb 6.0mg; 23 Feb 5.75mg; 9 Mar 5.5mg; 23 Mar 5.25mg; 9 Apr 5.0mg; 6 May 4.75mg; 13 May 4.5mg; 6 Jun 4mg; 12 July 3.5mg; 2 sep 3.0mg; 15 Sep 2.5mg; 1 Nov 2mg; 15 Nov 1.5mg; 16 Dec 1mg; 26 Dec 0.5mg; 2022 1 Jan - OFF

Escitalopram - 2022 1 Mar to 9mg; 29 Mar 8mg; 24 May 7mg; 21 Jun 5mg; 19 Jul 4mg; 1 Sep 3mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 31 Oct 1.5mg; 22 Nov 0.5mg; 2023 1 Jan 0.25mg; 1 Mar OFF

Nortriptyline  2018 90mg to 2020 1 Dec down to 72.5mg; 2021 20 May 70mg; 8 Jun 67.5mg; 24 Jun 65mg; 31 July 60mg; 12 Oct 55mg; 23 Oct 50mg; 2022 13 Jan 40mg; 22 Jan 30mg; 29 Mar 20mg; 26 Apr 10mg; 3 Aug 5mg; 23 Sep 2.5mg; 2023 1 Jan - OFF

 

1 March 2023 - off all drugs - 6-year taper off three drugs.

 

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