Themethodologyman90: Pure Zoloft destruction even after 9 years

[Themethodologyman90]

Hey there, I have been on a very long dark road the last 9 years which all started with taking Zoloft when I was 18. I was prescribed Zoloft when I was 18 years old for night time panic attacks and anxiety. I was living in a really rough place at the time and suffered some abuse which brought on the Panic attacks at night at the age of 13. So around the age of 18 I saw a family doctor who prescribed me Zoloft at 25mg which I took once a day for roughly 10 months to almost a year. At the time I didn't know that tapering was even a real thing all I knew was I wanted to get off this drug that was making me feel like a zombie and not able to feel emotions. Being the brave hard headed kid I was I stopped taking Zoloft cold turkey, and that is when I experienced true hell on Earth. I suffered greatly and was completely bed ridden for the first 5 months of withdraw, I completely lost my identity and felt as if I was watching my life from the outside looking in. My memory was so bad that sometimes I would forget my girl friends name. I had major sexual dysfunction with massive suicidal thoughts and thoughts of hurting other people that felt like massive impulses which manifested itself through compulsive thoughts.

 

So 2 years go by and I slowly get some sense of reality I don't know how I made it 2 full years of agonizing pain. I guess the fear of death and giving up was still greater then going through the pain. Most of the days I would hope something would kill me though that way I didn't have to do it myself and because I am religious I would still feel like I made it to the end and kept faith. I didn't want to die it was just an internal feeling pulsing with waves of thought pushing me towards it which I didn't control and fought everyday.

 

Now 9 years off of Zoloft and I am left with massive brain fog which major memory problems and no ability to concentrate. I took an IQ test at the mental hospital and scored  a 152 but my brain was so slow in processing that I failed the cognitive test as if I had brain damage. I can understand large complex concepts but its the ability to process and imagine new ones and learn that was the problem. It is like I am just spinning data through my brain but nothing forms from it anymore.

The biggest thing I suffer with now is massive chronic fatigue and always feeling mentally foggy. I have a hard time speaking in long sentences which will randomly be caught off.

 

I am curious if anyone else out there has taken an SSRI and even after almost 10 years been still completely crippled by it. Mainly the Chronic fatigue and brain fog with the sexual dysfunction. I got an MRI and it came back completely normal, my thyroid test normal and my blood work normal. Here is what is so crazy to me, I have no sexual interest and major sexual dysfunction as 28 year old young man but my testosterone is at 780 which is naturally extremely high.

 

Is it possible stopping Zoloft so fast even at a 25mg basically shut down my Dopamine and Serotonin production which is why I don't even feel like a human being anymore? I mean I literally feel numb from head to toe, it's scary. I am sure I did some kind of brain damage but if anyone has some hope or solution you can throw my way I would be forever grateful. I don't want to give up on life but who would want to continue after 9 years of hell then ending up a completely numb zombie with no emotions and 24/7 chronic fatigue? Everyone needs hope and wants to know there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

 

I have a theory that stopping so fast basically makes it so your body and brain go into shock and stop producing the chemicals in the brain. Which would leave you in a lowered production rate. Does it make sense to go back on an SSRI and taper slow or has it simply been to long to have any success ?

[Altostrata]

Welcome, TMM.

 

I'm very sorry you've gone through this. 

 

No, your brain and neurons are producing the proper chemicals, your nervous system is just not reacting to it in the normal way. It got a shock when you stopped Zoloft cold turkey.

 

What we usually see is very gradual healing. You have already experienced this to some extent.

 

All we can do is suggest you keep your body as healthy as possible, this will help your nervous system normalize, too. Do you get at least a half-hour of gentle exercise, such as walking, each day? Do you eat lots of fresh food, avoiding packaged food, sugar, and artificial additives?

 

What is your sleep pattern? Have you found you're very sensitive to some supplements or foods?

 

Many people do better with fish oil and magnesium, see

 

King of supplements: Omega-3 fatty acids (fish oil)

Magnesium, nature's calcium channel blocker

 

Try a little of one at a time to see how it affects you.

 

How is your vitamin B12 level?

[Pedro]

Hi; I’ve been off Effexor, as well as benzos and Wellbutrin, for 10 years and still have symptoms. I never had these symptoms prior to being prescribed these drugs.