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Need some support and advice


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I have been having a real rough go at it the last couple weeks. I have been off Lexapro for approx 14 months and daily Clonazepam 22 months. I keep going up and down with insomnia and it is really starting to get the best of me. I can have one night of 7 or 8 hours then the next zero followed by some 4,5 or 6 hour nights. My DP is pretty bad too. 


I think I may be hampering my body finding it's own way back to sleeping. I have been following all of the sleep hygiene tips, recently did a course of CBT-I, and take magnesium and 250mcg of melatonin. More melatonin than that and it is paradoxical. But, about once every week I break down and take a .25mg Clonazepam or  a Unisom. the Unisom makes me feel horrible the next day. Ironically, the Clonazepam seams to work better the next night or it is shear coincidence that I sleep good the following night or two, then by the third and forth night it's downhill. I think I know the answer  but my thoughts are that I am destabilizing my CNS by taking the intermittent sleep aids. I have been doing this for the last year and even had a few months straight of Lunesta use which had it's own withdrawal reaction. I think I need to bite the bullet and let things happen naturally.  What are your thoughts?

1994-2015: Many trials of SSRIs for anxiety and depersonalization coupled to the anxiety. 

2013 to 04-2016: Clonazepam .5 three times a day. Slowly tapered on 04-2016. Withdrawal was hell for 6 months them stabilized. 

2013 to 2014: Celexa 20mg 

2014- to 01-2016: 20mg Prozac

01-2016 to 11-15-2016: 10mg Lexapro. Did a 2 month taper to zero on 11-15-2016. the last 5mg were water titration. 

12-25-2016 Started having sleeping issues. By 01-01-2017 sleep disappeared for 4 days. Was hospitalized for three days.

01-01-17 to 01-10-2017 Trial of 37.5mg for three days than 75mg Effexor. Created major anxiety so I stopped it. 

01-16-2017 to 01-26-2017 Trial of Brintellix 10mg. Stopped due to aggravating sleep issue and anxiety.

02-10-2017 to 02-17-2017 Reinstated 5mg of Lexapro. Usual startup anxiety and foggy head. Started getting tinnitus. Stopped the Lexapro thinking that caused the tinnitus.  



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