Believer

[Believer]

Hi @DaBro, thanks so much for taking the time to respond and share your experiences and thoughts.  Much appreciated. 

[Believer]

Hi all,

 

Posting an update of what’s been going on the last several months.

 

I saw my PCP in April, and based on my symptoms alone, she diagnosed me with carcinoid syndrome/“malignant” carcinoid tumor. After 3 months of testing (blood, urine, CTs, MRIs) and a couple referrals to specialists, I learned that I don’t have carcinoid syndrome/tumor, thank God. After my experience, I saw a link here that stated withdrawal symptoms are very similar to carcinoid syndrome symptoms.

 

It was a very stressful 3 months, which only increased my stress and anxiety, which could have thrown off some of my initial labs (high white blood count, dehydration from polyuria & low blood pressure, to name a few).

 

The polyuria spontaneously resolved after I learned I didn’t in fact have carcinoid syndrome (stress is a powerful thing!) My labs at the oncologist’s in July we’re all back to normal. Whew...

 

Over the past several months my symptoms have decreased significantly. I have gained back 8 of the 18 pounds I lost, I am sleeping and double vision has cleared up.

 

I cross tapered over two weeks from my expired pills to a new Rx, and have made 1 drop of 5%, BM slide style.

 

I read your stories often and am so disheartened by all of the suffering caused by these drugs. I tell myself to reach out and support others but have been lousy at it. I tend to crawl into my hole and just hang on. I’m hoping to change that.

 

As hard as this road is, I do believe we will heal, it might just take a long time and may be really difficult at times.

 

Don’t give up!

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Greatful]

@Believer  Thank you so much for stopping by on my thread Believer.   I can relate to your symptoms an what you should do.   I would wonder about poop out too.  Maybe Brassmonkey can help you with that.  

 

I can also relate to all the time on our hands now that we are not working.  I think it is the worst when we pressure ourselves in the" we should be busier. " If you decide to taper and see how it goes, remind yourself that this is your time.  Put no expectations on yourself, if you feel bad and don't want to do anything that is okay, lay on the couch, read, listen to music do what ever you feel that day.   If you don't want to see people that's okay too,  focus on yourself and your needs first.  I really don't know if I can to any holiday functions or go back to work,  but I was told that I can celebrate my holiday's in anyway that I want, if that is in my PJ's on the couch so be it.  I have to focus on me and what's best for me.  Remember we are trying to heal for ourselves and nothing more.  

 

Take care of yourself❤️

 

  

[Believer]

@Greatful Hi,

Thanks for stopping by!

Agreed, I am thankful I’m no longer working. It has been a challenge finding things to do to occupy my time and no longer being a part of the work force, but it’s happening. Not having the stress that came from work has been a huge blessing. With the stress of my job (2 unexpected role changes), life stressors and the stress that tapering has put on my body/mind, something had to give. My husband was able to retire early as well. 😊

 

Yesterday became the beginning of the first real window I’ve had in 9 months and it’s wonderful!

 

I have made two 5% cuts since August. I figured I had to try something after holding for 16 months. You’re right, focusing on taking care of me and getting off this blasted drug is what I need to do right now, and that’s a process I’m learning. 😜 

 

I hear you about the holidays. I may join you in wearing PJs this year.

 

Please let me know how you’re doing.  ❤️

 

[Greatful]

@Believer  Stopping by to see how you are doing?

[Believer]

Hi @Grateful,

Thanks for stopping by. I’m struggling mostly. I have had a couple of brief windows (hours) for a day or two over the past 10 months or so. Nothing like the ones I used to get prior to this time last year. I remember crying tears of joy while walking to my car after work, just feeling so thankful for the relief.

 

I’ve been feeling depressed, anxious, have tingling in my limbs and torso in the morning hours, full head feeling temperature disregulation and body tension. I am eating and sleeping good so I’m thankful for that. And I haven’t had strong Aka for many months. Things are heading in the right direction, but it is soooo slow.

 

I see you posting on other threads, your attitude is great, it will serve you well!

 

I hope you are coming out of your recent wave and getting some symptom relief.

 

Hugs!

[Greatful]

@Believer Stopping by to see how you are doing?😊

[Believer]

Hi @Greatful,

It’s so kind of you to check in with me. I really appreciate it. 🤗

I’m doing okay. Hoping for a better WD normal than where I am currently at though, so I can make another cut. Not sure that’s going to happen, I’ve been holding for about 3 months since my last cut.

 

I am sleeping 5-6 hours a night but never feel rested or have much energy. Morning-afternoons are often tough, but it can be different day to day.

 

How about you? Have you settled since your crossover to liquid? Are your symptoms improving?

 

Hope your seeing some improvements.

 

Believer

[Greatful]

@Believer  The wait is hard isn't it....Have you had any improvements in the last 3 months?  You may be in your WD normal..

It's so confusing what is WD normal....It is so hard to feel drained......I hope you are not expecting to much from yourself, remember to be kind and patient with yourself.❤️I do a lot of nothing lol......I did start to do  Ease - Gentle Yoga with Michele Fifi.  Boy am I way out of flexibility lol  I haven't finished a whole session yet, 50-60 min long.....I just started this week did 2 days  yippy skippy. Now the trick is to keep up with it.....😁

 

I am doing okay...I managed the switch to liquid Lex and the splitting the dosing in to 2 times a day.....It was bumpy,  but because I could have adverse affect form the lex,  I am starting to taper again.....So far doing okay.........One never knows from day to day.

 

You've got this❤️

 

[Believer]

On 2/25/2022 at 3:22 PM, Greatful said:

@Believer  The wait is hard isn't it....Have you had any improvements in the last 3 months?  You may be in your WD normal..

It's so confusing what is WD normal....It is so hard to feel drained......I hope you are not expecting to much from yourself, remember to be kind and patient with yourself.❤️I do a lot of nothing lol......I did start to do  Ease - Gentle Yoga with Michele Fifi.  Boy am I way out of flexibility lol  I haven't finished a whole session yet, 50-60 min long.....I just started this week did 2 days  yippy skippy. Now the trick is to keep up with it.....😁

 

I am doing okay...I managed the switch to liquid Lex and the splitting the dosing in to 2 times a day.....It was bumpy,  but because I could have adverse affect form the lex,  I am starting to taper again.....So far doing okay.........One never knows from day to day.

 

You've got this❤️

 

Hi @Greatful

Thanks for checking in, it means a lot!

 

A year ago my WD normal used to be very low, manageable symptoms. I have improved a bit over the past three months but not where I’d like to be to make another drop. Symptoms wax and wane from day to day and within the day. I have been at this for six years and just feel stuck right now. It has been very grey and rainy for months, which doesn’t help. 
 

How is the yoga going? Are you finding it helpful? I have tried it in the past but didn’t stick with it. I do try and get in a couple of walks outside or on my elliptical every day.
 

I really hope you get some relief as you get lower in your dose.

 

Praying for you. 

[Believer]

Hi All,

I developed myoclonic jerks shortly after my last reduction 4 months ago that have continued to get worse. 
 

Holding is not helping. It started out as minor twitches in my left arm and has built up to jerks in left arm and right leg. Thankfully it doesn’t happen while I’m sleeping, it starts upon waking and is off and on throughout the day. I take my Zoloft at 0730.

Has anyone who has this symptom seen it improve or get worse as they continue to taper?

 

Thanks for any input.

[Greatful]

@Believer  It truly is amazing and disturbing the way these drugs affect us. Sadly because it changes our brains it also changes other things in our bodies..........I hope you find an answer......How are you feel other wise....

Hang in there and remind yourself that you are healing every second, every minute, everyday.......To bad we can't speed it up lol

 

Somehow someway we will survive this and be off these drugs♥️

[Believer]

Hi @Grateful

Thanks again for your thoughts, always appreciated.

Overall I feel really symptomatic; anxious, depressed, lethargic, etc. I would really like to continue my taper but don’t want to make things worse.

 

I really appreciate your positive, uplifting post. It does help. It can be really hard to stay positive when you feel bad.

 

I’ll pop over to your thread to see how you’re doing.

 

Hugs

[Greatful]

@Believer  I surely can relate to being symptomatic.......You have been at this for awhile and it can get pretty tiring---- You will get there, you have already shown a great deal of perseverance....Sadly I can relate to the depression and how hard it is when it hits.   It takes all you can muster up as far as coping skill to get through them, do you have any good advice to help me with it?  I can get into the spiral of I don't think I am going to make it out of this, but usually it gets a little lighter so I can have hope again......There is nothing harder to combat then your grey thoughts and heavy feeling in your body and brain.  Do you get any breaks from it?  I tend to  get hit it pretty hard for a week or so after a cut and let's not even mention the anxiety lol...

Some how some way we will get through this.......At least one day at a time...... and say "I am so glad I don't have to go through the last day, month or for some of us the last year.......😳

 

Hang in there.  If you ever need to talk I am here for you...

 

 

[Greatful]

@Believer  How are you doing?♥️

[Believer]

Hi @Greatful

 

Thanks for checking in, very much appreciated!  I haven’t really had much symptom relief, depression, anxiety, myclonus….. I am sleeping good, although I don’t feel sleepy, I just wake up and it’s 2:00-3:00 in the morning, I then doze and dream for a couple of hours. 
 

I made another cut a couple of weeks ago and haven’t had a huge spike in symptoms so that’s good. I go really slow or they catch up with me.

 

The anxiety has really stuck to me and it’s my most difficult, it used to show up in the mornings since I started my taper but it would dissipate in the afternoon, not anymore.

Now it is my constant companion. Which brings on depression and a feeling of hopelessness. Along with the new myoclonic jerks. Ive never had issues with anxiety prior to messing with the drug dosage/tapering. Sorry not a good update.

 

How are you doing with your taper? Are you having windows and waves?

 

Thanks again for checking in, looking forward to hearing about your progress.

 

Hugs

 

 

[Greatful]

@Believer this truly is a horrible thing we have to go through.......I can relate to the anxiety and depression.....So hard to get through the days when you feel so heavy in the heart ----emotional drained........I would think that you will stable out and the anxiety will go down....Just in time for another cut lol.

You are getting so close.......I find that with my cuts I have a dip in some symptoms then they start to come out of it.......I still feel plenty sick with WD.  My hubby calls it WD stable misery lol.......Over all, I think as I go down I feel a little better......I laugh at the thought of  windows and waves.

I think I am in a little window when I don't have such low mood. lol 

 

It's good that you are able to sleep......One small plus in this nightmare..  I sleep but not like I use to--more restless and usually wake up anywhere around 4am to 6am  sometimes I can drift but sometimes I try to hold out until at least 6-6:30 before getting out of bed........I wait all day for bed time and then in bed I think morning will be here soon and I have to start all over lol........  I tell my hubby this is unreal, what these drugs have done to me.  Can you believe all the crazy physical and emotional things that we experience.......

 

Hang in there-  be kind to yourself♥️

[Greatful]

@Believer  How are you doing♥️

[Believer]

Hi @Greatful

 

I hear you about the sleep, I’m super thankful I sleep, the weird thing is I very rarely feel tired, I don’t know when I drop off, I just know I wake somewhere between 200-4:00 and then doze/dream.

 

The anxiety is pretty much constant anymore but does lift in the evening a bit as you say so I can go to bed and start all over the next day.

 

I haven’t had a any real windows for over a year, very discouraging.

 

I have been getting out and doing things with my hubby but it seems I pay for it, I haven’t  figured out the difference between stretch and push and tend to push I guess. Then I get more symptomatic, especially increased myoclonus in my abdomen. So annoying.

 

Just driving around or being a passenger is difficult for me, so much stimulation.

 

How are you feeling after your last cut?

 

Hang in there and thanks for letting your light shine and being so supportive.

 

Hugs

[Greatful]

@Believer

Stopping by to see how you are doing?  I remember when just diving in the car was a challenge...Let alone going into a store.  But I use to go a lot with hubby and sometimes just myself to get out of the house---B oy sometimes my head felt like it was going to explode and I was going to jump out of my skin from over stimulation...It does get better--Keep going--even if it's just for a drive in the country-or now with the weather nicer maybe to a lake and sit by the shore-watch the waves...

 

You say you haven't had a window in over a year...What's a window🙄 I count it as a window if I am not horrible depressed 😒

 

I see that you and I have been on these drugs for about the same amount of time...One day we will be drug free and this will be a faint and distant memory.....

 

 

Sending you a big hug🤗 and encouragement♥️

 

[Ariel]

Hello @Believer

Thank you for your kind message in my thread. 

How are you feeling?

Healing wishes,

A. 

[Believer]

Hi @Greatful and @Ariel,

Thanks for checking in, it is most appreciated. ❣️

 

Nothing has really changed for me, but I have done another 5% cut. I haven’t noticed any increase in symptoms, maybe a little sleep disruption, but not much.

 

Feeling pretty discouraged. I have done 5% cuts with many holds the past couple of years. From 25 to 5.5mg this worked well and was predictable. Now every day is a challenge and I admit that I am frightened of going back to the worst of it. It seems as if I have plateaued after my crash 18 months ago and don’t see any further improvement. Many of the same symptoms the two of you describe.

 

I’m still working on acceptance of how much my life has been impacted and telling myself that this is caused by the drug/withdrawal because it feels like me now. I woke in the middle of the night a couple days ago and my mind wasn’t racing, it was both a relief and weird, at first a bit of peace, but also a void, if that makes sense. But now it’s back to racing. Some of the most troubling symptoms have been gone for awhile, nightmares, akithesia, polyuria, insomnia, Adrenalin rushes and panic attacks, for which I am VERY thankful. Tingling comes and goes, anxiety, arm and abdominal jerks are pretty consistent. It’s hard not to be where I was before my crash; working, some socializing, driving where I wanted/needed to, etc. Now I am easily over stimulated and trying to learn those boundaries. I remind myself that others suffer for different reasons, all of us in WD, other illnesses, losses, etc., and be thankful for the life I have, but admittedly I struggle with it.

 

I don’t post much because I don’t want to be a downer and things haven’t changed much, but I do follow you and love to read your posts. You’re both a gift to this community! 
 

I know that God is with me and daily try to put my trust in him to carry me. 
 

Hugs to both of you and thanks again for reaching out.

 

Believer

[Ariel]

@Believer 

Hi there,

It's good to read your update.

 

1 hour ago, Believer said:

Nothing has really changed for me, but I have done another 5% cut. I haven’t noticed any increase in symptoms, maybe a little sleep disruption, but not much.

 

You are my hero for hangin' in there and going the slow, steady, stable route. I applaud your patience and perseverance! 

I did not taper properly myself so I don't know much about it. Isn't it a good thing that you're not getting an increase in symptoms? 

 

1 hour ago, Believer said:

Feeling pretty discouraged. I have done 5% cuts with many holds the past couple of years. From 25 to 5.5mg this worked well and was predictable. Now every day is a challenge and I admit that I am frightened of going back to the worst of it. It seems as if I have plateaued after my crash 18 months ago and don’t see any further improvement. Many of the same symptoms the two of you describe.

 

I'm sorry you're dealing with these symptoms and feeling discouraged about it. I can relate to the feeling of having plateaued. Honestly I don't feel I have any wisdom to offer. All I can say is 

I hear you and yes this is really ridiculously difficult (to the point that I can't actually process how hard it is), and I'm sorry you're going through this. 

 

1 hour ago, Believer said:

I’m still working on acceptance of how much my life has been impacted and telling myself that this is caused by the drug/withdrawal because it feels like me now.

 

Ouch, this really hits home. This is exactly how I feel so much of the time.

 

Actually I can't tell whether I've accepted it or am just deeply numb/shut down to it. I have difficulty feeling anything about it, except when I have the rare interaction with someone who has a "normal" life -- then I can sometimes feel overwhelmed with all kinds of negative emotions, seeing my situation laid out in such stark contrast to theirs. That indicates to me there must be some pain I'm carrying about this experience, somewhere inside me. Most of the time I'm too detached, in DP/DR spacy disoriented mode, to comprehend what's happening. I don't know whether or not this is "me" but it doesn't feel like "me". (It never ceases to amuse me that I can feel like I don't know who I am, and also feel like I'm not myself -- if I really didn't know who I was, wouldn't I be unable to tell whether or not I am myself? This makes me giggle.) I sure hope it's WD and not "me", because I'm really hoping these symptoms pass. 

 

1 hour ago, Believer said:

I don’t post much because I don’t want to be a downer and things haven’t changed much

 

You don't ever have to worry about being a downer. Of course you're welcome to not post if you don't feel like it, but just so you know it's not a bummer to read your news. We all know what it's like to struggle through and that's what we're here for, to help each other through hard times. 

 

You're very brave, Believer. It is humbling and inspiring how you keep going and moving forward little by little, but sure enough. Give yourself lots of credit for your efforts!

You're doing the hard work and healing is happening. Healing is happening all the time, even when we don't consciously feel it. 

 

In solidarity and support,

A. 

 

 

 

[Greatful]

@Believer Thank you for your update.  I can relate to not posting much for fear of being to negative.  Somehow it seems hard to  finding positive things to say about ourselves, but we find it in ourselves encourage others. I enjoy talking and sharing with you.  So post anything you want 🤗  Even what you did for the day. It does help to know that you are not alone.  Besides if everyone sugar coated things and never talked about their difficulties how would that help us feel better.   Knowing that we are not alone.  This is whole experience is incomprehensible.   Yes we have some learned coping skills, but that doesn't always ease the loneliness the fear,  that comes with all this. 

 

 

4 hours ago, Believer said:

Feeling pretty discouraged. I have done 5% cuts with many holds the past couple of years.

I understand how discouraging this is.   You are almost there. ♥️  I am proud of you for taking steps forward ever day. 

 

I can so relate to this  "the fear of going back to the worst horror show". 😬

As I've read on here.  At least we don't have to go through that again.  Sadly I can relate to the over stimulation.  I find it hard sometimes to carry on conversations for very long.  Do you ever get it were it is hard to speak, it takes energy to put thoughts into word, plus follow conversations...On SA it's not as hard.  You do one thing at a time...Read then type. Even sometimes that can be a challenge too

 

Do you do any Vagus Nerve work?  Is it okay for me to share idea's with you.  

I find it helps bring down my anxiety and calms me 

https://youtu.be/dkJDrfL90rU Vagus Nerve: Breathing For Relaxation

https://youtu.be/-S8KT7w4uaA Vagus Nerve Reset 

 

4 hours ago, Believer said:

I’m still working on acceptance of how much my life has been impacted and telling myself that this is caused by the drug/withdrawal because it feels like me now.

This is hard for me also. I miss my family, children, grandchildren  and friends.  I want to be able to enjoy them.  If there is silver lining in all this with less numbing drugs we will be able to fully enjoy them when we are healed from this Temporary Chemical Brain Injury.  😊

 

I can go from staying in the day (mild acceptance) to anger over this, to fear of staying like this, to who am I, to hopelessness.  We have been at this a long time.  Do you ever wonder who your going to be? I have been on drugs for over  20 years...They didn't really treat me right but stayed on them thinking it was me.  Sick depressed, anxiety.   Somehow I know that I am not.  The drugs kept making me sicker. 

 

We can heal from this and have a much more meaningful life drug free.♥️  

 I'm with you through the long haul Believer ♥️

[Believer]

@Ariel

Thank you so much for your kind and thoughtful reply. You had me crying tears of being understood, and accepted, so sorry that you do understand this though.

 

On 6/14/2022 at 10:23 AM, Ariel said:

I don't know whether or not this is "me" but it doesn't feel like "me". (It never ceases to amuse me that I can feel like I don't know who I am, and also feel like I'm not myself -- if I really didn't know who I was, wouldn't I be unable to tell whether or not I am myself? This makes me giggle.) I sure hope it's WD and not "me", because I'm really hoping these symptoms pass. 

This made me giggle too. I know it’s not the me I used to be, that’s for sure. I know it’s caused by WD, but there are times my brain questions that. I’m hoping they pass for you and for all of us too.

 

Thanks for sticking around and being a light to this community.

 

I wish this could be an in person 🤗.

 

Believer

 

[Ariel]

@Believer

Sending you grateful thoughts and big hugs <3

Thank you so much for your supportive messages, you are such a light. 

I was just reading back through your thread and you have been going through so much yourself for the past years. 

My heart goes out to you in your struggle. You are very brave!

I see you working really hard to keep going and get through and I hope you give yourself lots of credit for your efforts. 

Wishing you moments of peace and relief, and hoping that you are being at least as gentle and kind with yourself as you are with the rest of us. 

Healing is happening all the time, even when we don't consciously feel it <3

A.

[Ariel]

@Believer

Thinking of you <3

[Believer]

Hi @Ariel

 

Thank you for your kind words.

I often don’t feel very brave, the fear is always in the back ground and it is ridiculous! But I keep plugging along, doing what I can, testing my boundaries without pushing too hard, otherwise I pay with increased symptoms. Sometimes just dealing with what the day brings along is enough and that’s usually not much. As you know, this withdrawal existence is a challenge in itself.

 

I was so happy to read that you had a beautiful window. I pray you see many more! So glad you’re a part of this community.

 

Hugs,

 

Believer

[Ariel]

Thank you for your kind wishes, dear @Believer

I'm glad you're a part of this community, too. 

 

I don't know that I've ever felt brave; I just feel afraid. 

Brave is what that looks like from the outside. 

One of the many reasons why it's so valuable to exchange perspectives. 

 

Have you noticed the quote in my signature? 

Courage is fear that has said its prayers. 

I like that one. 

 

Sending you a hug <3

[Ariel]

Hello dear @Believer

How are you going?

I am sending you appreciative hugs and many thanks for your kind message in my thread.

I'm sorry it has taken me so long to respond, I've been in protracted denial about my topic (in more ways than one)! 

Plugging along, or at least plodding a long ... 

Sending many good thoughts in your direction, healing vibes to you <3

A. 

[Greatful]

@Believer How are you doing? 

Sending you encouragement and a hug🤗

[Believer]

Hi @Arieland @Greatful

 

Thanks so much for checking in. I am doing about the same. I have had a small glimmer of hope here and there, but sadly not often.
 

I did just complete another 5% cut, so that’s something.
 

The fear/anxiety can be just crushing and so demoralizing. It’s like a switch has been flipped on, and ONCE in awhile the dimmer will turn down, but not often or by very much. Then there is the lack of interest in anything. Just going out with my husband to shop and have lunch, wipes me out. I was able to go to the grocery store and shop by myself last week (a 50 min round trip drive) so I am happy about that, but I feel over stimulated and concerned about my response should something out of the ordinary happen. And even what used to be ordinary, speeders, construction, etc., can cause me to feel more unsettled. It’s just crazy. I often end up taking a “toxic” nap after these trips.
 

I can only hope and pray that my brain will heal.
 

Cutting my dose is scary because I never feel stable but it’s the only direction for me. 
 

So, that’s my update, not very encouraging, but carry on I shall.

 

I so appreciate reading your encouraging posts all over the forum. I hope to some day be in that space. So thankful for both of you. Please let me know how you’re going/doing. 😜

 

Stay strong!

 

Believer

[Greatful]

@BelieverYou sound a little like me.  Keep plodding along.  I connected to Hibaris's success story.  Have you read it?

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/27029-hibari-polydrugged-benzos-twice-and-now-im-well/

 

You are getting there slowly but surely.  One day believer we will be drug free

 

Rest assured you are not alone with the over vigilant fear center (amygdala) that is on it's own track of fear, fear , fear.   Do you notice anything positive as you go down. i.e. clearer brain, less restless,  low mood?

It amzes me  when I ask myself what am I afraid of?  Why do I feel like I have to panic and run.  then I go o yeah there is nothing to be afraid of, a quick sense of calm, then it's back to my fear center taking over. 

 

Are you on liquid? As you know I am doing a slow daily taper instead of a one time monthly decrease  So far it's going okay. Sure I have dips still,  but I am able handle them better.  

 

Here is a big encouraging hug🤗

 

 

Edited August 8, 2022 by Greatful

[Believer]

Hi @Greatful

yes, I have read Hibari’s story. Very inspirational, one of my faves.

 

As I get lower, my symptoms continue to cycle. I have been laughing a bit more often, so that’s cool. Yesterday I experienced a new feeling of derealization. It’s odd how many variations of the symptoms there are. 
 

I have an expensive lab grade scale that I use. I started out cutting 10% per month. Over the years I slowed it down considerably and now I cut 1% per day for five days and hold for 6+ weeks. This seems to be working okay at the moment.

 

I’m glad you’ve found a taper method that works for you and that you’re able to handle the dips better, what a relief, I’m sure. Do you decrease your dose every day, or do hold at a certain point?

 
You mentioned in that past that you had started yoga, are you still doing it?

 

🤗 big encouraging hug back to you!

 

[Greatful]

Oh @Believer,  I am the worst one for constancy.  Lately I've been doing TRE, some guided meditation, and early  mornings before I get out of bed try to do some quite meditation.  I try to come up with different affirmations.  If one don't work try another.  Each day that goes by is one day closer for me getting off of Lexapro and Lamictal.  FOCUS Those are my first ones to go.  The lamictal blunts me so bad. 

 

Is that the first time you experienced D/R?  Your right the symptoms move around, sometime hourly or daily.  I do notice that my mood swings aren't as big.  

It's nice to get glimpses of joy, laugh, or even a little bit normal right🌞 

 

I am tapering 0.02ml  daily to get to 10% cut.  Then I will hold and let things settle down.  I wish the slow taper would eliminate all the WD LOL but a long as I can make it to my pillow every night and do a little bit here and there throughout the days, that has to be what gets me by for now.  

 

Onward we go.🤗

 

 

[Kat66]

On 8/7/2022 at 5:28 PM, Believer said:

And even what used to be ordinary, speeders, construction, etc., can cause me to feel more unsettled. It’s just crazy. I often end up taking a “toxic” nap after these trips.

I can totally relate to this @Believer. It doesn't take much to send you off what stability you have. What are your main symptoms at the moment?