KeepingFaith's riveting introduction

[KeepingFaith]

Hello all!

 

I've lurked around these forums on and off for a couple years now, but my current situation and the reading I've been doing on here has inspired me to commit to getting off of these stupid pills. Here's a  backstory of how I got here - please excuse the length

 

When I was 17, my then-girlfriend cheated on me. I took it pretty hard. My parents were concerned about how long I was taking to get over it; my Mom's side of the family had a history of clinical depression, and in their mind my response to what had happened wasn't proportionate. After some debate - and in spite of my objections - they took me to a psychiatrist. After maybe 20 minutes of basic questions, a seemingly dispassionate doctor diagnosed me with clinical depression and prescribed me 50mg Pristiq. I don't remember objecting much to taking the medication. I was 17, and he told me it should make me feel better in a few weeks . Who was I to argue?

 

I started feeling better and continued to take the medication without thinking much of it. I went off to college, and had a great first two years. For some reason, though, during one of the occasional 15-minute calls I had with my psychiatrist (I had seen him in person maybe twice), we decided to up the Pristiq to 100mg. I can't really remember why. In any case, I continued on in college and by all accounts had a fantastic experience. Looking back, I'm not sure how I accomplished what I did while I was there. During a single semester, I was president of my fraternity, captain of the varsity lacrosse team, started a small company with a few friends, and had my research accepted for presentation at the state's Federal Reserve building. I had a blast during that time. I slept a lot and missed a fair bit of class because of it, but I didn't think much of the sleeping given the nature of college.

 

I took a job right out of school with a company I had interned with. It was then that my sleep issues were exposed. Despite performing very well, I found myself unable to adjust to an 8-5 schedule. Even if I took melatonin and forced myself to fall asleep at 9:30-10, I would still find myself sleeping until 9-10 and missing work. This eventually led to me losing the job. After a bunch of tests and research, we guessed that the hypersomnia was a function of both mild sleep apnea and a side effect of the Pristiq. I decided to get off of the Pristiq, and my doctor gave me a tapering schedule that took about a month.

 

Initially I felt great and figured it was smooth sailing from there. I was able to wake up at a normal hour. However about 6 months after coming off Pristiq, I entered the worst period of paralyzing depression and anxiety I had ever experienced. You guys know what I'm talking about - constant fear and the inability to think, sleep, or do much of anything. At that point I hadn't yet found this site, and while I was pretty sure it was withdrawal from the medication and not a 'relapse' of any kind, I opted to go to a new psychiatrist because I didn't know what else to do. I couldn't go on feeling that way. Naturally, the psychiatrist told me there was no way I was still experiencing withdrawal symptoms after 6 months, that it must be a relapse. He put me on Luvox. After about a month, I felt a bit better, but felt the sleep issues coming back and for the first time experienced some sexual side effects.

 

He then put me back on Pristiq and added Lamictal to attempt to combat the hypersomnia. It didn't fully resolve the sleep issues, and I still experienced plenty of fatigue, but it was bearable. After a year I decided I was tired of being tired and again attempted to get off of the medications. Unfortunately the timing coincided with some extreme stress at work, and I caved after quickly starting to experience some withdrawal symptoms. I went back on the Pristiq and Lamictal for about 6 months, then switched to Trintellix 5mg in an attempt to beat the hypersomnia. This worked great for about 5 months. Then, seemingly out of nowhere, a wave of depression built up and wouldn't go away. My doctor increased the dose to 10mg, then 20mg, and for the first time in my life I was legitimately suicidal. I told him this and he quickly "tapered" me off over the course of a week or so. This was last week. Now I'm back on Pristiq 50mg, and I've been prescribed Modafinil to attempt to combat sleepiness. Another doctor just gave me one of those GeneSight tests to try to find a drug that my liver is best suited to metabolize, but my research has indicated that these tests haven't really been proven to hold much weight.

 

Like all of you, I'm tired of being medicated. I'm tired of not feeling any emotion. I'm tired of sleeping all the time. I'm tired of switching medications and experiencing side effects that make it impossible to think and impossible to live. I'm ready to be done with all of this. I work a very stressful job and put in 60 hour weeks, and I'm sure it will be a big challenge to try to deal with that while going through withdrawal, but at this point I'm thinking it has to be worth it.

 

Thank you for bearing with me to this point and for letting me share my story. If you have any insight on the best course of action on tapering given that I'm in a transitional period in regards to medication, please feel free to share.

 

-KeepingFaith

[Gridley]

Hello, KeepingFaith, and welcome to SA.  I am sorry you have been having a difficult time.  You have made a lot of dosage and drug changes, so if you are experiencing withdrawal symptoms, that is to be expected.  While it might be a challenge tapering while working at your job, if you taper slowly enough withdrawal symptoms can be minimized.

 

To give members the best information, we ask them to summarize their medication history in a signature -- drugs, doses, dates, and discontinuations & reinstatements, in the last 12-24 months particularly.

• Any drugs prior to 24 months ago can just be listed with start and stop years. 
• Please use actual dates or approximate dates (mid-June, Late October) rather than relative time frames (last week, 3 months ago) 
• Spell out months, e.g. "October" or "Oct."; 9/1/2016 can be interpreted as Jan. 9, 2016 or Sept. 1, 2016. 
• Please leave out symptoms and diagnoses. 
• A list is easier to understand than one or multiple paragraphs. 
• Link to Account Settings – Create or Edit a signature.

At Surviving Antidepressants, it is recommended that a person taper by no more than 10% of their current dose with at least a four week hold in-between decreases.  The 10% taper recommendation is a harm reduction approach to going off psychiatric drugs.  Some people may have to taper at a more conservative rate as they are sensitive to even the smallest drops.
  
To get you started, and familiarized with the protocols followed by SA, I am linking a few topics so that you have a better understanding of what is recommended here. 

 

Before you begin tapering what you need to know

Why taper by 10% of my dosage?

Brain Remodelling

What is Withdrawal Syndrome?
PDF Monthly List of Dr Glenmullen's Symptoms to Print & PDF Monthly List BLANK to Print
 

This link give specific tips on tapering Pristiq:

Tips for tapering off Pristiq (desvenlafaxine)

 

This is your introduction topic -- the place for you to ask questions, record symptoms, share your progress, and connect with other members of the SA community. I hope you'll find the information in the SA forums helpful for your situation. I'm sorry that you are in the position that you need the information, but I am glad that you found us.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[KeepingFaith]

Gridley,

 

Thanks so much for the detailed response and thoughts. I've added my medication history into the signature. I'll spend some time digging into the resources you shared. I'm nervous about this process, but the information and support here gives me some hope.