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Mood "cycles"?


Shrike
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Hello All.

 

Anyone have experience with certain times of day being "good" or "bad" in terms of mood/symptoms? My mornings are generally the worst in terms of symptoms and "crazy" thinking and then by late afternoon (many days) I feel almost "normal" - as in like my old self! In the evenings I can FEEL emotions and THINK thoughts that seem like a "reasonable person"! I LOVE IT! It gives me great hope and of course relief. 

 

SO, here is my question. Does anyone else experience this? If so, has anyone found a way to "extend" that time/mood into the not so good ones? In my case, I know I have high cortisol at night which causes sleep quality issues and early restless wakes. I am working on that with some supplements which are helping albeit a bit slower than I'd like ;-). Anyone else discover any variables that mattered?

 

Would love to hear others experiences and/or tips.

 

Thank you! I love this community!

 

G

 

 

4 year journey off of ADs, finally antidepressant free since July 2021! Still in protracted withdrawal but getting better (still 'injured' and impatient but so grateful to be getting my 'self' back...slowly...)

 

12 years total of SSRIs and SRNI use then 7 month break, then Mirtazapine for sleep

  • Lexapro - 2005 - 2009
  • Effexor - 2009 - 2012 (tried to get off, tapered down, quit for a few weeks)
  • Pristiq - 2012 - 2014
  • Lexapro - 2013 - 2016
  • Buspirone - 2013 - 2018 (30-60 mg)
  • Klonopin - 2013 - 2018 (1-3 mg)
  • Abilify - 2016 
  • Remeron - 2016 
  • Cymbalta - 2016 (seemed to start working but GI side effects were horrible)
  • Celexa - 2017 
  • Pristiq - 2017 (few months, made me switch to generic - didn't "work")
  • Fetzima - 2017 (few months - kinda worked but anxiety literally drove me crazy - obsessive thoughts)
  • Trintellenix - 2017  (felt like a psychotic break, fast taper [too fast] ended November 15, 2017)
  • No ADs - 7 months free of antidepressants (very glad I did it, but no sleep was agony - so desperate I surrendered to Mirtazapine prescription)
  • Slow methodical taper off of Clonazepam (~2017 - 2018)
  • Mirtazapine - June 2018 to July 2021
  • Antidepressant free since July 2021!

 

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Oh, here is a graph of cortisol levels if anyone is interested...

Screen Shot 2018-02-19 at 7.32.11 PM.png

4 year journey off of ADs, finally antidepressant free since July 2021! Still in protracted withdrawal but getting better (still 'injured' and impatient but so grateful to be getting my 'self' back...slowly...)

 

12 years total of SSRIs and SRNI use then 7 month break, then Mirtazapine for sleep

  • Lexapro - 2005 - 2009
  • Effexor - 2009 - 2012 (tried to get off, tapered down, quit for a few weeks)
  • Pristiq - 2012 - 2014
  • Lexapro - 2013 - 2016
  • Buspirone - 2013 - 2018 (30-60 mg)
  • Klonopin - 2013 - 2018 (1-3 mg)
  • Abilify - 2016 
  • Remeron - 2016 
  • Cymbalta - 2016 (seemed to start working but GI side effects were horrible)
  • Celexa - 2017 
  • Pristiq - 2017 (few months, made me switch to generic - didn't "work")
  • Fetzima - 2017 (few months - kinda worked but anxiety literally drove me crazy - obsessive thoughts)
  • Trintellenix - 2017  (felt like a psychotic break, fast taper [too fast] ended November 15, 2017)
  • No ADs - 7 months free of antidepressants (very glad I did it, but no sleep was agony - so desperate I surrendered to Mirtazapine prescription)
  • Slow methodical taper off of Clonazepam (~2017 - 2018)
  • Mirtazapine - June 2018 to July 2021
  • Antidepressant free since July 2021!

 

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  • 6 months later...

GregoryReboot - I can relate exactly to what you descibed. I’ve been on here since June (I think) and just stumbled onto your post. I tell my family that I mood swing all throughout the day, but by evening, I feel almost normal, at times. This isn’t always the case, but morenoften than not.  

 

I was thinking estrogen, but maybe it is due to cortisol?  Regardless, I’m ready for it to stop. 

 

ghm

2002 - 2014, 500mg Keppra 2x’s/day (anti-seizure med)

2003 thru 2004 - 10 mg Remeron

2005ish - Adverse reactions to single doses of Zoloft, Wellbutrin, and Lexapro (no long-lasting problems)

2012 - Buspar (overly energized, stopped immediately, no long-lasting problems)

2014 - 1 month taper off of 500mg Keppra (Leviteracitam) - seizure free for 12 years 

2017 - 500mg Leviteracitam (generic keppra) 

2017 - Mid-Dec experienced adverse reaction to Leviteracitam due to different manufacturer. Stopped on Dec 20.

2018 - Jan 1st, 10 mg Fluoxetine (generic prozac) experienced severe adverse reaction after 3 doses and continue to experience issues today. 

2003 - 2018 Ativan, occasionally/rarely
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yes the feel that way  a lot off the time .  yesterday i had wave that  lasted all day  and today had wave in the morning after 10;30 am  having nice window  almost my self.  

buspar  7/16 to 4/17  does  45 mg, 30 mg , 15mg then 60 mg  stopped did not like the side effects  tapered 

paxil    10 mg 10 /16  11 / 16 bad reaction  stopped  

xanax  .25 mg as needed   10 /16  30 days  only stopped 

ativan  1/17 1 mg 30 days supply  tapper off   the best i could  1/16/18  stopped 
prozac  4/16 to  1/17    20 mg start   then 6 months 40 mgs then down  10/17 to 20 mgs   off 2/17 bad reaction  stopped 

 klonopin  .5  three daily   as needed  took .5 for 30 days when getting   on Prozac 5/1/17 stopped   then started again  1/2/18 to 4/10 stopped by tapering over 30 days down to .125 a day. though time, but  better now stopped 

Mertizipine   11/16 to present started 15 mg  at 7.5 mg  4/17 to  7/18 ,  7/4/18   3.5 mg  skipping does  the plan was to go off it while on  Prozac  but  it never worked    back on 7.5 mg 

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Bluepm - thank you for responding. I wish you weren’t experiencing this, but I’m glad to know that I’m not alone. Sometimes I feel like a hamster on a wheel. I have windows that last what seem like a short amount of time, like pinholes, compared to the waves. 

2002 - 2014, 500mg Keppra 2x’s/day (anti-seizure med)

2003 thru 2004 - 10 mg Remeron

2005ish - Adverse reactions to single doses of Zoloft, Wellbutrin, and Lexapro (no long-lasting problems)

2012 - Buspar (overly energized, stopped immediately, no long-lasting problems)

2014 - 1 month taper off of 500mg Keppra (Leviteracitam) - seizure free for 12 years 

2017 - 500mg Leviteracitam (generic keppra) 

2017 - Mid-Dec experienced adverse reaction to Leviteracitam due to different manufacturer. Stopped on Dec 20.

2018 - Jan 1st, 10 mg Fluoxetine (generic prozac) experienced severe adverse reaction after 3 doses and continue to experience issues today. 

2003 - 2018 Ativan, occasionally/rarely
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I join the club! The only times I can feel close to normal happen after dinner. 

 

How do you feel when your mood is up? I feel horrible anyway, l get "optimistic" thoughts which I hate and I begin to feel a chemical feeling while my mood lifts. 

November 2014 - September 2015: Zoloft 50 mg, Trilafon 4mg, clonazepam 1mg
October 2015 - September 2016: Effexor 75 mg
September 2016 - January 2017: Effexor 150 mg
Stopped Effexor in March 2017 after tapering under medical supervision
The doctor I've now found is an expert in withdrawal from ADs
Persistent withdrawal syndrome since July 2017: Prozac 10 mg, clonazepam 0.5 mg, to cope with it.
December 2017 -  withdrawing from Prozac, 10 mg every 2 days
Drug free since January (?) 2018
 
Symptoms: pins and needles, burning skin sensations, PSSD, OCD, mood swings (a lot), malaise (a lot), muscle spasms, voice in my conscience. 

Doing not so bad, but I want to be the person I was. 
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My eyes will often feel very clear or dry when my mood has cycled into being overly optimistic. Someday our windows will become longer, hopefully. 

2002 - 2014, 500mg Keppra 2x’s/day (anti-seizure med)

2003 thru 2004 - 10 mg Remeron

2005ish - Adverse reactions to single doses of Zoloft, Wellbutrin, and Lexapro (no long-lasting problems)

2012 - Buspar (overly energized, stopped immediately, no long-lasting problems)

2014 - 1 month taper off of 500mg Keppra (Leviteracitam) - seizure free for 12 years 

2017 - 500mg Leviteracitam (generic keppra) 

2017 - Mid-Dec experienced adverse reaction to Leviteracitam due to different manufacturer. Stopped on Dec 20.

2018 - Jan 1st, 10 mg Fluoxetine (generic prozac) experienced severe adverse reaction after 3 doses and continue to experience issues today. 

2003 - 2018 Ativan, occasionally/rarely
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@ghm2018@littleball  @bluepm

 

Thanks for responding to this guys! I have not found the *answer* yet but I can report that my *good* hours seem to extend earlier and earlier in general. Mornings are still generally plagued by demons and hauntings of my past, but sometimes I am better by late morning or early afternoon now.

 

Something that has helped me is fairly active exercise in the morning. Everyone is different, but the classes at the YMCA seem to be helping me burn off some of that morning fog. Most days I only do 1/2 the class (about 30 minutes) but that seems to work pretty well. 

 

Hope you guys continue to progress!


G

4 year journey off of ADs, finally antidepressant free since July 2021! Still in protracted withdrawal but getting better (still 'injured' and impatient but so grateful to be getting my 'self' back...slowly...)

 

12 years total of SSRIs and SRNI use then 7 month break, then Mirtazapine for sleep

  • Lexapro - 2005 - 2009
  • Effexor - 2009 - 2012 (tried to get off, tapered down, quit for a few weeks)
  • Pristiq - 2012 - 2014
  • Lexapro - 2013 - 2016
  • Buspirone - 2013 - 2018 (30-60 mg)
  • Klonopin - 2013 - 2018 (1-3 mg)
  • Abilify - 2016 
  • Remeron - 2016 
  • Cymbalta - 2016 (seemed to start working but GI side effects were horrible)
  • Celexa - 2017 
  • Pristiq - 2017 (few months, made me switch to generic - didn't "work")
  • Fetzima - 2017 (few months - kinda worked but anxiety literally drove me crazy - obsessive thoughts)
  • Trintellenix - 2017  (felt like a psychotic break, fast taper [too fast] ended November 15, 2017)
  • No ADs - 7 months free of antidepressants (very glad I did it, but no sleep was agony - so desperate I surrendered to Mirtazapine prescription)
  • Slow methodical taper off of Clonazepam (~2017 - 2018)
  • Mirtazapine - June 2018 to July 2021
  • Antidepressant free since July 2021!

 

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