Carmie: accidently doubling up on Seroquel one day while tapering

[bhasski]

Thankful for your visit on my thread and for the no meds push.

 

 

[Carmie]

13 minutes ago, bhasski said:

Thankful for your visit on my thread and for the no meds push.

 

 

 

We’re all in the same boat struggling. It’s not a good idea to add more meds to the mixture.

 

Life is extremely hard right now but all we can do is to keep distracting ourselves until we finally heal. I’ve shed many tears. 

 

Hang in there bhasski, this forum is great and we can do is to continue to support one another

[Hazel]

Hi Carmie and welcome to SA!

Thank you for stopping by my thread and posting.  It really helps to have support from those who get this.  I just read through your thread and you have such a positive attitude about this whole process that I really admire.  How are you managing today?

Hazel

[Carmie]

12 hours ago, Hazel said:

Hi Carmie and welcome to SA!

Thank you for stopping by my thread and posting.  It really helps to have support from those who get this.  I just read through your thread and you have such a positive attitude about this whole process that I really admire.  How are you managing today?

Hazel

 

Thank you for your kind words Hazel,

 

I’m struggling like everyone else but I keep thinking what can today to help me through this? 

 

I distract myself a lot, lots I’d DVDs, Netflix and crafts. I find making things for other people very therapeutic, I’m still making lots of blankets. It’s nice to have presents to give to people. I’m pretty numb when I’m in a wave and don’t find joy in much but I just keep going. What other choice do we have? 

 

I wake up many mornings thinking: “Oh, no, another day to get through.”  I think the best thing to do in the morning if one is in panic mode is to turn on the light, have a shower and get dressed. Lying in bed for ages and panicking just makes things worse, especially on cortisol mornings or where your body is shaking or vibrating.

 

I’m fortunate to have good friends, one rang me this morning to ask me to go for a nature drive with her. I looove nature and the beach is my happy place but I’m just too sick today. I have chronic fatigue syndrome on top of my withdrawals. It’s nice to know people care though. My friends are used to me saying no to things but they keep on inviting me anyway, which I so appreciate. I do go to lots of things but they understand when I can’t and they don’t give up on me.

 

Our emotions are weird, aren’t they, when we go through withdrawals. Everything is so intensified and we tend to become a little OCD with things. Was hurt by someone recently (not a close friend) and it’s just strange how our minds keep playing scenarios over and over again. I find that fasterEFT has helped me with lots of issues. It disconnects the pain to situations. You still remember what happened but the emotions connected with it are gone. It works amazingly. I’m a bit braindead today to practice it today but when I do again I know the emotional pain to the particular situation I just mentioned will be gone.

 

Am lying in bed at the moment watching Gilmore Girls and crocheting. Love this show, one of my favourite shows ever! I have been up though, am showered and dressed and have done my housework.

 

Wishing you all the best Hazel and everyone else on this site, sending the biggest hug ever🤗

 

 

 

[Rosetta]

Carmie, That's smart -- to get up and shower.  Wish I could do that.  Keep it up.  Don't let yourself get out of the habit.  I'm glad you still have friends.  Keep pushing yourself to go out when you can.  It's important.

 

Take care, Rosetta

[Carmie]

3 hours ago, Rosetta said:

Carmie, That's smart -- to get up and shower.  Wish I could do that.  Keep it up.  Don't let yourself get out of the habit.  I'm glad you still have friends.  Keep pushing yourself to go out when you can.  It's important.

 

Take care, Rosetta

 

Hi Rosetta, 

 

How are you doing?

 

Yes, I always continue to do things with friends. Try and do lots of fun things with them even when I feel totally numb. It’s so important to have a good support system and I have that. I hope you do too. It’s lovely being invited to things even if you’re too sick to go at times.

 

I’m still in a bit of a wave from a taper from about two months ago or so but once it subsides I’m going to have a little break. 

 

I’m sorry you aren’t able to get up in the morning to have a shower straight away. I find I need some kind of normalcy. I try and feel at least half human😃. 

 

Am watching Netflix at the moment. I have a TV in the bedroom where I watch dvds and a tv in the loungeroom where I watch Netflix. 

 

I have a few things I want to incorporate into my life in the near future. When I have the money I’m going to get a weighted blanket and I’m also going to get an essential oil diffuser. I know nothing takes away the pain from waves but one must keep trying to incorporate small things into our lives. Everyone reacts differently to essential oils but I’ve read that quite a few people have benefited. I love using sandalwood soap, must get some more. 

 

Anyway Rosetta, thanks for dropping by, and for anyone else reading this all we can do is take an hour at a time, sending the biggest hugs to each and every one of you 🤗🤗🤗

 

 

 

 

[Carmie]

Hi everyone,

 

Hope you are all doing as best you can,

 

Still going through a bit of a wave, not a major one though. Windows and waves all day so far.

 

I’m organising a tropical bbq at a friend’s place in a week and a bit. I arranged to do it at month ago or more thinking that by now withdrawals may have subsided a bit. I think they are slowly subsiding and all going well I will be okay. It’s really hard to plan things, isn’t it? Withdrawals are so erratic and you don’t know how you’ll be from one minute to the next.

 

I think distractions are great and I love organising things so here’s to being able to organise this party. This particular friend is not an organiser so I can’t leave her in the lurch. I actually love party planning so maybe it will be something to distract me for the week. I’ve got all the decorations and the like. Now I just have to get my mind around planning the menu, wish I had a brain😃.

 

Here’s to severe brain fog. I’ve had it for 23 years anyway because of another illness not related to meds. Oh, to have a brain that works!

 

I go through stages where where I don’t plan anything and just do spur of the moment things according to how I’m feeling, but every now and again I like to organise something. Usually it’s okay as I time it as best I can ( no such thing as good timing with withdrawals though, they’re erratic) but this last withdrawal actually got worse after a month and a half. I did accidentally take a double dose one day, so that wouldn’t have helped. 

 

I see on these threads that a few people have accidentally taking wrong doses, not remembering to take doses or accidently taking too much etc.

 

Easy to do when you can’t think straight. I only take one dose in the evening so it’s easier for me, but I feel for all you people out there that have to take many doses a day. Might be an idea to tick in a journal once you’ve taken it so you definitely know. Also to take it at the exact same time each day.

 

I can take mine any time at night, it doesn’t matter what time, it doesnt cause symptoms according to the time I take it,  but I try and take it around 9pm. If I’ve gone out to a concert at night and don’t get home until midnight I’ll take it then. If I took it earlier it would make me too sleepy and I wouldn’t be able to keep my eyes open.

 

I wouldnt recommend others taking their meds at different times though as we are all different. I think it’s always best to take it at the same time.

 

Take care everyone, and here’s to continuing to find distractions to get us through each day xxx

 

 

 

 

[Carmie]

A very thought provoking message written by one sufferer to another on tapering low doses and well worth reading. Am putting it here on my thread so I can look back on it. Here goes:

 

“ So often I see people beating their heads, unable to taper off at those low doses, making tiny cuts and getting hit again and again. I can’t help wondering if they’re making things worse. That maybe they just need to quit re-aggravating things for six months or a year and just let everything balance and heal and settle down and make all those changes the brain needs to make to adapt to that low dose ( and in your case , finish healing from all the mangling it’s gotten in the past.

 

Part of why I think this is because I have seen people just kind of give up on tapering these low doses for a while, a long time, even a year, and then try it again and it goes much better. 

 

I’ve also seen what a difference a longer hold makes for me. I usually don’t have the patience to do long holds, but when I do I’m amazed at how much change I see in my own condition ( and I’m always fairly stable when tapering because I go slow, so it’s always a surprise to me that there’s so much healing that can be done beyond merely being “stable”.)

 

It’s something to think about. It’s hard because it means doing nothing, and again, for the positive and resourceful type of person, doing nothing is way, way harder than doing something. You might consider it though. It’s been a long road for me but I’ve learned that the holds are at least as important as the reductions. Maybe more.” 

 

Certainly something to ponder on xxx

 

[Hazel]

Thanks for sharing this Carmie.  I have decided that I am going to do a long hold-at least 6 months or so, and this gives me even more inspiration to do so.  I am just so tired of the withdrawal symptoms and want to feel “normal” again.  Holding is hard, but I believe it will be worth it in the end😊

[Carmie]

6 hours ago, Hazel said:

Thanks for sharing this Carmie.  I have decided that I am going to do a long hold-at least 6 months or so, and this gives me even more inspiration to do so.  I am just so tired of the withdrawal symptoms and want to feel “normal” again.  Holding is hard, but I believe it will be worth it in the end😊

 

 

Hi Hazel,

I think that’s a great idea, just to have a little break every now and again. You sound like you’re going through such a hard time at the moment. 

 

I know with all the tapering I’ve done over many years that I always eventually end up in a window. I’m going through daily windows and waves at the moment but it’s bearable. When I’m finally in a window I too am going to hold for a while. I’m not sure how long yet but I need a little break from this madness.

 

Was doing okay for quite a few months, I was tapering at 5% every month and then I did such a stupid thing and tapered at 24 days instead of a month and got bad withdrawals. Then after two months while still having some withdrawals I tapered again. Soooo stupid. I really did know better. 

 

Here’s to having a little hold once we are in windows again.

 

By the way, Kristine on this sight has already ordered her weighted blanket and will let me know how she likes it. I’ll be getting mine within a month or so.

 

All the best my fellow sufferer Hazel💚

 

[Althea]

Hello Carmie,

 

It was so nice to meet you in my oftentimes rather silent thread! Thank you for visiting

 

I've read your thread now and it's so very inspriring to see how far you have come with your Seroquel taper. You've done such a great work!

 

I have a long, long way to go as I still have 350mg(150+200) to taper but you are a living example that with great patience it is possible. (Now I will hold with Seroquel for several months and continue with my Lamictal taper.)

 

It was shocking to learn that you were put on these meds because of pain, not because of any mental distress. When I think of that fact, it's even more amazing to me that you have managed to maintain such a positive and hopeful attitude. With that life is worth living even in the hardest times.

 

I have been very lucky so far: I have managed to stay functional, able to do almost all the things I did before I started tapering. Sometimes I try to do too much at home and in the garden but lately I've been rather lazy. I think I could adopt your positive view on distractions and sometimes allow them to myself without guilt. I am grateful for my functionality but have sometimes hard time on letting myself just be. Or do some creative stuff that I, too, enjoy, but actually allow myself to do way too seldom.

 

I hope you have a better day today! Sending hugs,

 

Althea

 

 

[Carmie]

19 hours ago, Althea said:

Hello Carmie,

 

It was so nice to meet you in my oftentimes rather silent thread! Thank you for visiting

 

I've read your thread now and it's so very inspriring to see how far you have come with your Seroquel taper. You've done such a great work!

 

I have a long, long way to go as I still have 350mg(150+200) to taper but you are a living example that with great patience it is possible. (Now I will hold with Seroquel for several months and continue with my Lamictal taper.)

 

It was shocking to learn that you were put on these meds because of pain, not because of any mental distress. When I think of that fact, it's even more amazing to me that you have managed to maintain such a positive and hopeful attitude. With that life is worth living even in the hardest times.

 

I have been very lucky so far: I have managed to stay functional, able to do almost all the things I did before I started tapering. Sometimes I try to do too much at home and in the garden but lately I've been rather lazy. I think I could adopt your positive view on distractions and sometimes allow them to myself without guilt. I am grateful for my functionality but have sometimes hard time on letting myself just be. Or do some creative stuff that I, too, enjoy, but actually allow myself to do way too seldom.

 

I hope you have a better day today! Sending hugs,

 

Althea

 

 

 

It’s quite a journey Althea, isn’t it?

 

Thanks for visiting my thread too. 

 

Im glad your functional. I can only do so much as I have Cfs as well but try and stay as positive as I can and look for fun distractions even when I feel totally numb and can’t feel the fun in them at all. I’m still in a bit of daily window and wave situation at the moment. Just waiting it out until I hit a window again. I always do eventually. It’s always just time, isn’t it?

 

Yep, not good when I started off in physical pain and then it was a downward spiral of meds. Someone on here is suffering because of being given meds because he was getting headaches and now is struggling to get off meds too. It’s a crime, it really is.

 

I was reading too today ( or was it yesterday, no brain) that someone had auricular acupuncture and it benefited them. I’ve been going to an acupuncturist but I haven’t been for a few months. Must go again.

 

This time I’m going to get him to do the auricular acupuncture. It’s five needles in each ear.

 

This protocol was put together for alcoholics and drug addicts, to help them with withdrawals.

 

I used to have this treatment not for addiction but because it was relaxing. I wasn’t on any meds at the time but a friend of mine was doing the treatments so I used to go. It was only $5 and it was good for sleep. Not sure how well it works on a body that’s actually going through withdrawals but I think I’ll go back to the acupuncturist I’m seeing now and ask him to do that treatment.

 

I just did some research of the five points that are used. Here goes:

 

Sympathetic point (behind fold) - balances parasympathetic and sympathetic nervous systems and has a strong analgesic effect.

 

Shenmen point- has a calming effect to help alleviate anxiety and nervousness that accompany withdrawal.

 

Kidney point- tonifys the source of energy and essence that is often damaged through chemical abuse and aids in resolving anger and aggression.

 

Lung point-strengthens the immune system and is associated with grief and letting go. 

 

Liver point: promotes repair of liver from drug and alcohol abuse and aids in resolving anger and aggression.

 

It’s called the NADA protocol. You can just google it.

 

Im going to ask my acupuncturist to do it from now on. He’s really nice so I’m sure he’ll oblige. Will probably ring the clinic and start making appointments in a fortnight for weekly treatments. These treatments are best done daily but he only works three days a week so I’ll probably book him for those three days ahead for a full month.

 

Not sure how much it will help as yet but lots of people have found great benefit in this protocol. Here’s hoping

 

You said you wanted to do some creative stuff again Athena, what kind of things do you like to do?

 

Okay, now it’s time for me to start crocheting and watching DVDs. I’m watching Frasier at the moment and making a pink blanket for a friend who loves pink. I’ve been out with friends for three hours this morning and I can barely move so it’s time to just chill.

 

Take care on your healing journey💚💚💚

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Carmie]

How is everyone coping today?

 

Windows and waves are the weirdest things aren’t they? 

 

In one day you can get windows and waves so many times.

 

I woke up this morning not doing so great but then later in the morning I was fine for quite a few hours and then the wave hit again, and it’s been windows and waves for the rest of the day.

 

Our poor brains are always trying to adjust.

 

How does one really explain this to someone who isn’t going through it? 

 

It’s hard to make arrangements with people when you dont don’t know how you will be from one minute to the next.

 

One thing I do know when I’m tapering though is that I ALWAYS hit a window eventually.

 

Still waiting for this continual window but when I do get it I’m going to have a few months of not tapering.

 

Hang in there everyone, this life of withdrawal really sucks but what can we do. We can’t look back, that doesn’t change anything. We just have to keep looking forward until we are all success stories as well.

 

Sending much love to everyone out there in this horrific withdrawal world💚💚💚

[Althea]

On 4/28/2018 at 9:41 AM, Carmie said:

 

It’s quite a journey Althea, isn’t it?

 

Thanks for visiting my thread too. 

 

Im glad your functional. I can only do so much as I have Cfs as well but try and stay as positive as I can and look for fun distractions even when I feel totally numb and can’t feel the fun in them at all. I’m still in a bit of daily window and wave situation at the moment. Just waiting it out until I hit a window again. I always do eventually. It’s always just time, isn’t it?

 

Yep, not good when I started off in physical pain and then it was a downward spiral of meds. Someone on here is suffering because of being given meds because he was getting headaches and now is struggling to get off meds too. It’s a crime, it really is.

 

I was reading too today ( or was it yesterday, no brain) that someone had auricular acupuncture and it benefited them. I’ve been going to an acupuncturist but I haven’t been for a few months. Must go again.

 

This time I’m going to get him to do the auricular acupuncture. It’s five needles in each ear.

 

This protocol was put together for alcoholics and drug addicts, to help them with withdrawals.

 

I used to have this treatment not for addiction but because it was relaxing. I wasn’t on any meds at the time but a friend of mine was doing the treatments so I used to go. It was only $5 and it was good for sleep. Not sure how well it works on a body that’s actually going through withdrawals but I think I’ll go back to the acupuncturist I’m seeing now and ask him to do that treatment.

 

I just did some research of the five points that are used. Here goes:

 

Sympathetic point (behind fold) - balances parasympathetic and sympathetic nervous systems and has a strong analgesic effect.

 

Shenmen point- has a calming effect to help alleviate anxiety and nervousness that accompany withdrawal.

 

Kidney point- tonifys the source of energy and essence that is often damaged through chemical abuse and aids in resolving anger and aggression.

 

Lung point-strengthens the immune system and is associated with grief and letting go. 

 

Liver point: promotes repair of liver from drug and alcohol abuse and aids in resolving anger and aggression.

 

It’s called the NADA protocol. You can just google it.

 

Im going to ask my acupuncturist to do it from now on. He’s really nice so I’m sure he’ll oblige. Will probably ring the clinic and start making appointments in a fortnight for weekly treatments. These treatments are best done daily but he only works three days a week so I’ll probably book him for those three days ahead for a full month.

 

Not sure how much it will help as yet but lots of people have found great benefit in this protocol. Here’s hoping

 

You said you wanted to do some creative stuff again Athena, what kind of things do you like to do?

 

Okay, now it’s time for me to start crocheting and watching DVDs. I’m watching Frasier at the moment and making a pink blanket for a friend who loves pink. I’ve been out with friends for three hours this morning and I can barely move so it’s time to just chill.

 

Take care on your healing journey💚💚💚

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hi Carmie,

 

I’m sorry for answering slowly, I'm not online every day…

 

Yeah, it sure is quite a journey. Indeed something that those not having to take this journey just can't relate to. I am so grateful for this site and this support available here, even though I haven't been very active here, just updating my taper. Sometimes it feels exhausting to think all those years of tapering that I have in front of me, but then I try to focus on the now. Time sure is the great healer.

 

I noticed I was thinking about functionality only in terms of being physically functional. I’m so used to my poor memory, constant tiredness and not being able to read and write with the speed and accuracy  I did before I was put on these drugs, that I don’t notice and therefore mention it! These drugs have definitely been deteriorating my cognitive abilities and I am not yet in that point of my tapering journey where I could say that I'd function better than before beginning tapering. I do look forward to that day.

 

By the way, I don't know if you're intrested, but I've tried to minimize that loss of cognitive abilities by playing brain training games. I found Elevate to be best app for me, it's free (if you don't upgrade to Pro) and games help improve usefull skills. For example, I had lost nearly all of my mental math abilities when I started, but nowadays I enjoy at least trying to do some everyday calculations on my own. It's satisfying to notice neuroplasticity in action. But memory is though one, sometimes I feel it's getting worse all the time. I play Elevate only twice a week to avoid overstimulation, which I have noticed to make my memory even poorer.

 

I fully agree, giving these drugs to anyone for any purpose is a crime. But it is gross injustice that they are used off-label to such purposes that they most definitely should not be used.

 

It was interesting to read about that auricular acupunction, I hadn't heard about it before. It's good to have many options to try during this journey. I have myself been using self-acupressure for constipation (with the advice of youtube videos) and have found it very helpful. I read about those videos (and about many, many other helpful healing related stuff) on the site https://beyondmeds.com/. And there I also came across an advisory article about acupuncture during withdrawal, and that came to mind now when I read about your plans. It is here:  https://beyondmeds.com/2013/08/21/how-to-approach-your-acupuncturist/

 

If you are not yet familiar with that blog, I definitely can recommend it. It is a huge fountain of useful information about healing. There are drop-down menus at the top of the page if one is searching information on a spesific topic. I like the "Random Post" button and the amazingly syncronistic articles that I have found that way 💫

 

You asked what creative I like to do; well, I like painting, dancing and knitting. And if journaling is considered creative, then that too...

 

Now I'm so tired I need to rest for a while, but then I will be doing some of those...

 

I hope you will get your continual window soon. Sending lots of love 💖💖💖

 

Althea

 

 

[Carmie]

My thoughts on my day today, but first of all wishing everyone the best in their healing journey💚. 

 

Woke up not so great today but it was windows and waves for the rest of the day. Have trouble finding joy in things but still keep doing things for distraction. I did actually stop n take a photograph of two grasshoppers. Every now n again I find a glimpse of me enjoying the things around me. I love photography n used to do so much of it. I’m a major nature freak as well but when in a wave am too numb to enjoy it.

 

Watched dvds n did craft for distraction this morning n discussed a themed bbq I’m organising at a friend’s place with that friend. I’m sure I’ll find some pleasure on that day being surrounded by some of my most amazing n caring friends. Love music so I’ll probably put a playlist together today or tomorrow for that event. That will be another good distraction if my brain will work enough to do that.

 

The funny thing is I was in Coles today getting a few things for the party n was actually singing along to the music in there. I might be ready to put on my dancing shoes this Saturday😃. I think music is great when going through withdrawals. Looking forward to seeing Imagine Dragons in concert next month.

 

Hang in there everyone, it’s a day at a time, sometimes an hour at a time, sometimes a minute at a time but we don’t have any other choice. These meds have done us injury and all we can do is to keep looking forward to a time when our brains are working again.

 

Sending much love to everyone xxxx

 

 

 

 

[Carmie]

Okay, just another few thoughts for the day,

 

This life really does seem unreal. It feels like the whole world around us keeps moving on with “normal” lives while we are in some kind of unreality.

 

I’ve  lived in a world of unreality for over twenty years with cfs, it’s a CNS illness as welll, with brain fog and not feeling like you’re really here.

 

But I tell you what, despite how debilitating it is and how I’ve spent so much time in bed because of it, it is nothing compared  to the hell withdrawls puts you through.

 

With withdrawals you live in a state of panic, not knowing how you will be from one day to the next, from one minute to the next. 

 

That being said there are lots of  recovery stories and all we can do is to keep looking to the future but at the same time trying to get through each day. 

 

It’s really hard but I’m an extremely positive person by nature with a great support system of friends. 

 

Here’s to just taking an hour at a time and doing the best we can.

 

Sending the biggest hug to each and every one of you🤗🤗

 

 

[Hazel]

Hugs to you Carmie!

It’s so great to read your positive posts despite the fact you are still having waves throughout the day.  You inspire me to have a more positive attitude as well. I think that can make a big difference in our healing.  Hope you get more and longer windows today😊

[Songbird]

Carmie, you have the most wonderful positive attitude, your posts make me smile.  Sending hugs to you too!

[Carmie]

On 5/1/2018 at 1:38 AM, Althea said:

 

Hi Carmie,

 

I’m sorry for answering slowly, I'm not online every day…

 

Yeah, it sure is quite a journey. Indeed something that those not having to take this journey just can't relate to. I am so grateful for this site and this support available here, even though I haven't been very active here, just updating my taper. Sometimes it feels exhausting to think all those years of tapering that I have in front of me, but then I try to focus on the now. Time sure is the great healer.

 

I noticed I was thinking about functionality only in terms of being physically functional. I’m so used to my poor memory, constant tiredness and not being able to read and write with the speed and accuracy  I did before I was put on these drugs, that I don’t notice and therefore mention it! These drugs have definitely been deteriorating my cognitive abilities and I am not yet in that point of my tapering journey where I could say that I'd function better than before beginning tapering. I do look forward to that day.

 

By the way, I don't know if you're intrested, but I've tried to minimize that loss of cognitive abilities by playing brain training games. I found Elevate to be best app for me, it's free (if you don't upgrade to Pro) and games help improve usefull skills. For example, I had lost nearly all of my mental math abilities when I started, but nowadays I enjoy at least trying to do some everyday calculations on my own. It's satisfying to notice neuroplasticity in action. But memory is though one, sometimes I feel it's getting worse all the time. I play Elevate only twice a week to avoid overstimulation, which I have noticed to make my memory even poorer.

 

I fully agree, giving these drugs to anyone for any purpose is a crime. But it is gross injustice that they are used off-label to such purposes that they most definitely should not be used.

 

It was interesting to read about that auricular acupunction, I hadn't heard about it before. It's good to have many options to try during this journey. I have myself been using self-acupressure for constipation (with the advice of youtube videos) and have found it very helpful. I read about those videos (and about many, many other helpful healing related stuff) on the site https://beyondmeds.com/. And there I also came across an advisory article about acupuncture during withdrawal, and that came to mind now when I read about your plans. It is here:  https://beyondmeds.com/2013/08/21/how-to-approach-your-acupuncturist/

 

If you are not yet familiar with that blog, I definitely can recommend it. It is a huge fountain of useful information about healing. There are drop-down menus at the top of the page if one is searching information on a spesific topic. I like the "Random Post" button and the amazingly syncronistic articles that I have found that way 💫

 

You asked what creative I like to do; well, I like painting, dancing and knitting. And if journaling is considered creative, then that too...

 

Now I'm so tired I need to rest for a while, but then I will be doing some of those...

 

I hope you will get your continual window soon. Sending lots of love 💖💖💖

 

Althea

 

 

 

Hi Althea, 

 

How are you doing today?

 

Thanks so much for visiting my friend. It’s great to have support going through something this debilitating and scary. This site is amazing and all the mods have such great advice about what to do as regards the actual meds different ones are on. You are certainly right, it does feel exhausting thinking about all the years we’ve tapered and the years of tapering still to come. 

 

I think acceptance is the only thing we can do, we can’t change the past and what has been done to us.

 

Yes, cognitive problems are a major issue in this process. I already had cognitive issues for a long time because of my illness, but withdrawals just takes it way up into another level. Sometimes I just have to laugh at myself because my memory is so bad. I’m constantly losing things, I can’t remember where I put them.

 

All I can say is don’t put something important in a “safe” place because you will never find it again😂😂. 

 

Tell you a funny funny story too about memory Althea. One day I was in a shopping centre and this man walked past me, looked at me and said: “ Yes, I do speak French.” Okay????? It wasn’t until later that I realised I put on my tshirt that said Voulez Vois Francais. When I realised this I couldn’t stop laughing.

 

Yes, I like doing cognitive things but I can’t spend too much time doing close up things as my eye sight has gotten worse since going through withdrawals because I used my iPad so much for distraction. I spent many, many hours doing Words With Friends. It was fun n I’d be doing it now but don’t want to cause too much eye strain with the close up.

 

Thats great you are getting good at math. It will help you with the tapering calculations. I’m not fabulous at math but I’ve managed to do all the calculations so far in my taper. When I start microtapering the calculations are even tinier.

 

I have a read a few things on beyond meds but not a lot. I must check it out. Good to know about the random post button. Thanks for the advisory article on acupuncture. I’ll check it out in a minute.

 

I’m glad you’ve got such fun creative things to do. I did some painting the other day too. I have abstract paintings on my walls in the loungeroom that I bought,  but I love the beach n I’ve been wanting to give the room a beachy feel so I bought teal and white paints and changed all the colours in the paintings. It turned out really good and I had fun. I mixed the colours too n ended up with different shades of blue. Distraction! Distraction! Distraction!

 

Take care Althea, and thanks again for dropping by💚

[Carmie]

14 hours ago, Songbird said:

Carmie, you have the most wonderful positive attitude, your posts make me smile.  Sending hugs to you too!

 

Thank you for your kind words Songbird, that warms my heart, but I must say I don’t always feel positive.

 

Im glad I’ve made you smile though.

 

Hope you’re doing okay today and you find a little sunshine in your life. I’m just altering a dress at the moment and am going to watch some more DVDs. I like buying whole series of shows that I like as there are many hours of distractions there. I think I’ve watched Gilmore Girls about a million times, it’s my favourite show ever. Am going through the Frasier series at the moment. I also just bought season two of Murder She Wrote.

 

I find sci fi good escapism while going through withdrawals. Big Star Wars fan. There’s a new movie this year.Yay! Also love Star Trek. I must get Star Trek on DVD. I’ve been watching The Next Generation on Netflix. I’ve seen it before. Live long and prosper😜.

The new Lost In Space on Netflix is great. Love it!!! Come on, hurry up season two! There’s also a new Jurassic World movie coming out this year that I’m looking forward to. Don’t know if you saw the last one but it cracked me up because one lady was wearing high heels through the entire movie while being chased by dinosaurs. So funny. Take those shoes off lady🤣.

 

Thanks again for your kind words and popping by xxxx

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Carmie]

15 hours ago, Hazel said:

Hugs to you Carmie!

It’s so great to read your positive posts despite the fact you are still having waves throughout the day.  You inspire me to have a more positive attitude as well. I think that can make a big difference in our healing.  Hope you get more and longer windows today😊

 

Thank u so much for the hugs Hazel, much appreciated and right back at you.

 

Yes, positivity can make a big difference but when in a wave that positivity sometimes can fly out the window can’t it? 

 

All we we can do is just to take each moment as it comes. I hope that your thoughts of what happened at school have subsided a bit. I always find that if I’m dwelling too much on a thought and it goes over and over and over again in my head the only thing that seems to stop it for me is FasterEFT.

 

I prefer that much more than the usual EFT and I’ve had such success with it. I really need to start doing it again but I keep procrastinating. I’ve had something going over in my mind for many weeks now and I really need to solve that issue within myself. Okay, this procrastination has to stop and I just need to work on the issue. Let’s see if I finally get around to it this week.

 

Thinking of you and hoping that you’re having a better day Hazel💚

 

 

 

[Carmie]

Hi everyone, 

 

One last thought for the day. Everyone on here is AMAZING!!

 

There’s no way to explain to others who aren’t going through withdrawals what this is like.

 

I’ve read many threads here n everyone is certainly going through the hardest thing they will ever go through in their lives. I would love to to comment on everyone’s threads n tell them they are not in this alone but I too am struggling. I sooo appreciate everyone that has contacted me, it means a lot. 

 

I still have a sense of humour despite feeling numb a lot of the time.

 

I still have my creativity despite being numb.

 

I still do lots of things with my most amazing  friends despite being numb.

 

I still watch movies and tv series and DVDs on Netflix despite being so numb.

 

I still look at nature around me despite being numb.

 

i still do crafts despite being numb.

 

The list goes on and on. We may feel numb, we may be in severe waves, we may be just going through minor but disturbing symptoms but what choice do we have? We have to just keep putting one foot in front of the other.

 

I’m spending time with friends tonight. I don’t feel like it but I love my friends and they are there for me. I think thinking of others and being there for them despite the hell we go through somehow helps us to cope.

Im not in a major wave like some of you are but I’m in a waves and windows situation all at the same time in one day. 

 

I’ve been checking this site quite a bit and I think it’s ABSOLUTELY AMAZING but I think sometimes we also need to switch off from reading other people’s sad stories. 

 

Here’s to taking one day at a time and doing what’s best best in our recovery from these horrific meds we’ve been put on but at the same time checking in with others every now and again. No one outside of the withdrawal world gets us but sometimes we need to switch off too.

 

I really want to send each one of u one this site the BIGGEST HUG EVER. Thanks for your support 💚💚💚💚

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Altostrata]

You're amazing too, Carmie. (((Hugs))) back at you!

[Carmie]

On 5/2/2018 at 5:05 PM, Altostrata said:

You're amazing too, Carmie. (((Hugs))) back at you!

Thank u for the hugs Alto 💚💚💚

[Carmie]

Feeling a little scared tonight.

 

Something didn’t agree with me n I vomited. 

 

Now im struggling to sleep. Think I may have vomited up my nightly dose of Seroquel but not sure how much. Too scared to take another dose as I don’t know how much of it I vomited up. 

 

Scared about how it will affect me if i didnt absorb much of the seroquel.

 

I want to cry. 

 

Just going to lie here until the morning. 

 

Really scared of the repercussions 😒

[wantrelief]

So sorry you were sick.  Hopefully your dose was absorbed before you vomited or enough of it that you won't feel any repercussions.  I hope you are able to get some sleep and that you feel better in the morning.  

[Hazel]

Hi Carmie,

Thinking about you and hoping you are doing all right. 😊

[Carmie]

Thank you for your kind thoughts @wantrelief   @Hazel

[Rosetta]

Hi Carmie, I hope you are feeling better. -R

[Carmie]

5 hours ago, Rosetta said:

Hi Carmie, I hope you are feeling better. -R

 

Thank u for dropping by Rosetta,  I’m feeling much chirpier this afternoon.

 

Not sure if I’ll get any repercussions from last night yet, though I was in a wave all morning, it’s lifted a bit now. I’ve been in a daily waves and windows situation for two months so the wave today may have just been a continuation of that. 

 

We don’t always feel the effects of things straight away either. Sometimes things can hit us with a vengeance many weeks after.

 

But as for right now I’ve got my positive cap back on again😃. And hour at a time and forward we march. 

 

Sending hugs🤗

 

 

 

[Songbird]

Hi Carmie, hope you're feeling okay.  I don't think a problem with one dose is going to hit you with a vengeance weeks later.  I don't think it is likely to have significant repercussions if you've been otherwise keeping a steady dose every day.  Please try to let go of all the "what if" thoughts, and keep that wonderful positive cap on.

[Carmie]

Hello one and all, 

 

How are we doing today? Hope everyone is coping as best they can hour by hour.

 

My windows are finally getting longer since the last taper. Was pretty much in a window for the most part of the last two days and have been in a window all morning so far. Yay!! Here’s to everyone else hitting windows soon too. It’s taken over two months to get here but I’m slowly getting there. 

 

Our bodies are erratic (up, down, up, down) but I ALWAYS hit windows eventually. I think this may be my big window now, though I may still get some waves. We can only take an hour at a time.

 

By the way @Songbird you’re so right at not worrying about the “what if’s?” Thanks for your encouragement, much appreciated.

 

Okay, so now I’m going continue to hold at 7.5mg for another month or two and try and have a bit of normalcy. I really think it’s a good idea to have a break between tapering when you’re in a window and go out and do some fun things and not have to focus on withdrawals. 

 

Then when you’ve got up a bit of fighting strength again, start again. This really is a battle and a fight and we need strategies.

 

I’m going to get back into doing FasterEFT, I used to practice it all the time. It has helped me so much but I keep procrastinating lately. Hazel just started it and is finding it beneficial. When I went into “what if?” meltdown Friday night I should have used it as it would have calmed me down. 

 

I’m going to do research n add other strategies as well.

 

My weekend was fun. I stayed at a friend’s place and organised a themed bbq. I was amazingly in a window and had a lovely time. It was so weird because on the Friday I had lots of waves and then Saturday and Sunday I had lots of long windows.

 

How things can change from one day to the next.

 

Wishing everyone the best on their healing journey 💚💚

 

 

 

 

 

Every time I taper I al

[Hazel]

That’s wonderful Carmie!  I am hopeful that I will get a window soon as well.  That sounds like a great plan to hold for a couple of months and enjoy being stable.

[Rosetta]

I'm glad you had a couple of good days, Carmie!  Thanks for all your kind words for everyone lately.  Your positivity is much appreciated. -- Rosetta

[Carmie]

3 hours ago, Rosetta said:

I'm glad you had a couple of good days, Carmie!  Thanks for all your kind words for everyone lately.  Your positivity is much appreciated. -- Rosetta

 

Thank you Rosetta, 

 

You really are a sweetheart, 

 

This journey we are all going through is immensely hard to say the least.

 

I’m grateful I’ve got long windows again but I’ve got many, many years of tapering to go and a lot of pain still to endure. All we can do is to take it one day at a time, an hour at a time, a minute at a time.

 

When we’re in windows I think the wisest thing to do is to find lots of strategies for the times when the waves come crashing down with a vengeance. When we’re in a major wave all reasoning can fly out of the window, though there are still strategies to incorporate.

 

Two things I want to do within the next month or two while I’ve got lots of windows is to start my FasterEFT again and get a weighted blanket. Make that three things, I also want to get an aromatherapy diffuser. 

 

In this process I think we procrastinate a lot, I know FasterEFT has helped me through so much but when you’re numb everything feels overwhelming. I cope so much better when I practice it daily. I need to start again. Okay motivation start working again. You can do it!

 

With me it’s not just the withdrawals, the Cfs stops me from doing a lot as I’m so weak and have no strength. 

 

My friend who I stayed with this weekend is so strong, she exercises all the time. It was so funny as I didn’t even have the strength to open some of the jars. 

 

Besides spending time with friends at the bbq this weekend I enjoyed sitting around open flames of a fire pit. It’s just so relaxing watching flames. They’re so beautiful. 

 

Nature is healing. I think we all need to get out in nature more.

 

Sending you the biggest hugs Rosetta, you are an inspiration to all of us here 💚

 

 

 

 

[Carmie]

Hi everyone,

 

Here is something interesting a friend shared with me. I love to crochet n knit as it helps me when withdrawals are severe.

 

Pretty zonked at the moment. Not due to withdrawals but due to Cfs so can’t write much. 

 

Here’s part of the article: 

 

“Research suggests that the rhythmical, repetitive motions of knitting could enhance the release of serotonin, a hormone that regulates mood, learning and sleep. Serotonin is a naturally occurring painkiller. This could explain why knitters have reported improved mood, feelings of calmness and lower levels of pain.”

 

When in a wave we don’t feel calm, off course, but the repetiveness of either knitting or crocheting is such a great distraction. When I first was going through withdrawals I knitted a million scarves as pressies. Now I crochet blankets.

 

An added bonus is that you have presents to give to friends. I just do the same stitch over and over, the repetitiveness of it helps me get through waves. I watch dvds or Netflix when in waves and crochet blankets at the moment. 

 

Thanks everyone on this site for your support. I’ll write on some of your pages soon but I’m really struggling to think today.

 

Sending big, big hugs to everyone 🤗🤗🤗