Tao of the Brassmonkey

[RusTW]

Brass your awesome man.

Live it up 

[Longroadhome]

It’s great to hear from you and thank you. Shooting off to work now can I come back and ask you a few questions later about my experience coming off Paxil so far and will I ever be normal after being on this drug for 15 years . Thanks brassmonkey for continuing to be there for us.  

[ChessieCat]

@Longroadhome

 

On 2/26/2019 at 1:24 AM, brassmonkey said:

Over the last several months I have had very poor Internet availability and have tried to post updates whenever possible. I have not been able to make answers to people who have asked some rather complicated questions. For the forsee able future this will be the case. Once I get back from holiday there will be a lot of personal matters that will need attending to plus at least one hospital stay. I apologize for not getting back to people, but I want to be able to give proper answers. Please bear with and I'll get to it when I can. 

 

[Longroadhome]

Thank you ChessieC for letting me know. And thank you for being there I don’t know what I’d have done without this site . You are all amazing giving up your time to help us. Greatly appreciated. 

[Vonnegutjunky]

Just stopping by to say thank you so much for the hope brass. I know you are not around and are busy living life! 

 

I am down to 7.3mg of Paxil after being on for 12 years now. I also experienced poopout. 

 

I was down to 6.8 and started having bizarre obsessive intrusive thoughts, I am actually tapering slower than you. So I went back up to 7.3mg, and it stopped 5e intrusive thoughts, but I am afraid to taper, until I read your thread. So I will taper slower than I was in hopes of finally being med free. 

Thank you  

 

[brassmonkey]

Making a note that I had another migraine aurora this afternoon.  As usual it lasted about half an hour.  This one was notable because is suddenly appeared fairly large instead of starting as a small spot.  the shimmering part of the crescent was courser triangles instead of diamonds and the interior of the crescent was filled with a brown checkerboard pattern.  I also noticed large light blue patches outside the crescent.  I felt like the left side of my face was flushed and the "hangover" was more pronounced and took longer to subside.

 

The constant irritation/pain of the stent is really wearing me down.  There seems to have been a large uptick in the irritation/pain over the past week or so.  It will be several more weeks before I can get it removed and I really can't wait.

[Vonnegutjunky]

I get those same exact ocular issues with my migraines. Zig zag, checkerboard pixelated, wavy lines, prism, flashes of glittery light, it’s beautiful and frightening and then I get sick lol.  

[brassmonkey]

I just realized that I've overlooked a nonevent that was actually pretty important.  This last Monday marked the 2 year anniversary of my hitting "0".  So much has happened and so much has changed in that time it completely skipped my mind.  Other than having an 18 month wave that lasted a couple of weeks there has been nothing really to report.  I will admit that I've been rather distracted the past several months with the trip and any physical symptoms would have been over shadowed by the ongoing problems with the kidney stone and shoulder.  But really, I haven't felt anything that could be chalked up to WD.

 

I have my preop appointment for removing the kidney stone in a couple of hours and the operation date has been set for several weeks from now, so that is in the works. The constant irritation of the stent is quite bothersome and rather painful at times.  Combine that with the daily muscle spams in the shoulder, which can be quite painful, I'm not a happy camper ATM. But there is an endpoint in sight for part of it and once that's out of the way I'll get going on the rest.

 

I've noticed that we have a number of new members who have been on Paxil for a long time.  I'll tell you it is possible to get off of it and return to a pretty normal life, but it has to be done in a very slow and controlled manner. And for everyone else out there, please don't talk yourself into the "I want these drugs out of my body now" frame of mind.  We have proved time and again that trying to go fast will actually take a longer time then if you do a slow and controlled taper.  You will get there and we want you to do it in the least painful manner.  So take your time and do it right, do overs take a long time to get under control and sometimes are not an option.

[Longroadhome]

18 hours ago, brassmonkey said:

I just realized that I've overlooked a nonevent that was actually pretty important.  This last Monday marked the 2 year anniversary of my hitting "0".  So much has happened and so much has changed in that time it completely skipped my mind.  Other than having an 18 month wave that lasted a couple of weeks there has been nothing really to report.  I will admit that I've been rather distracted the past several months with the trip and any physical symptoms would have been over shadowed by the ongoing problems with the kidney stone and shoulder.  But really, I haven't felt anything that could be chalked up to WD.

 

I have my preop appointment for removing the kidney stone in a couple of hours and the operation date has been set for several weeks from now, so that is in the works. The constant irritation of the stent is quite bothersome and rather painful at times.  Combine that with the daily muscle spams in the shoulder, which can be quite painful, I'm not a happy camper ATM. But there is an endpoint in sight for part of it and once that's out of the way I'll get going on the rest.

 

I've noticed that we have a number of new members who have been on Paxil for a long time.  I'll tell you it is possible to get off of it and return to a pretty normal life, but it has to be done in a very slow and controlled manner. And for everyone else out there, please don't talk yourself into the "I want these drugs out of my body now" frame of mind.  We have proved time and again that trying to go fast will actually take a longer time then if you do a slow and controlled taper.  You will get there and we want you to do it in the least painful manner.  So take your time and do it right, do overs take a long time to get under control and sometimes are not an option.

Well done on your 2 year anniversary Brass Monkey you should be very proud !! 

you give all us new Paxil members hope and I thank you for that.

Good luck with the ops and may you have a fast recovery ! 

[Longroadhome]

On 4/9/2019 at 7:29 AM, Vonnegutjunky said:

Just stopping by to say thank you so much for the hope brass. I know you are not around and are busy living life! 

 

I am down to 7.3mg of Paxil after being on for 12 years now. I also experienced poopout. 

 

I was down to 6.8 and started having bizarre obsessive intrusive thoughts, I am actually tapering slower than you. So I went back up to 7.3mg, and it stopped 5e intrusive thoughts, but I am afraid to taper, until I read your thread. So I will taper slower than I was in hopes of finally being med free. 

Thank you  

 

Hello there Vonn

are you having lots of symptoms tapering  have you had to hold at all and over what length of time if so. 

What method are you tapering 10% per month? 

[Sottana]

Congrats brass! Thanks for all the hope and encouragement. This forum is a saving grace!

[Gracee]

On 4/19/2019 at 1:07 PM, brassmonkey said:

 

I've noticed that we have a number of new members who have been on Paxil for a long time.  I'll tell you it is possible to get off of it and return to a pretty normal life, but it has to be done in a very slow and controlled manner. And for everyone else out there, please don't talk yourself into the "I want these drugs out of my body now" frame of mind.  We have proved time and again that trying to go fast will actually take a longer time then if you do a slow and controlled taper.  You will get there and we want you to do it in the least painful manner.  So take your time and do it right, do overs take a long time to get under control and sometimes are not an option.

 

Yup, I'm one of those long-time-Paxil-members.   I've learned enough over the years to know WD is not a race.   I'm so old, I'll probably go to the grave tapering.   BTW, T__,   I remember you from the PP days.   Glad you were able to fulfill your travel dream.   Best Wishes,

G.

[Vonnegutjunky]

5 hours ago, Longroadhome said:

Hello there Vonn

are you having lots of symptoms tapering  have you had to hold at all and over what length of time if so. 

What method are you tapering 10% per month? 

Long, 

 

i am am not having a lot of symptoms but the symptoms I am having are very very intense- I feel like I am losing my mind - I don’t know if it’s from the anxiety or what but I feel so mentally unstable - I am having partial seizures but I’ve always had those - they are now changing - and I taper much less than 10% it took me a year to drop down 1mg - 

 

i am also tapering after experiencing an adverse reaction - 

[JackieDecides]

On 4/19/2019 at 12:07 PM, brassmonkey said:

I'll tell you it is possible to get off of it and return to a pretty normal life

 

congratulations on anniversary! 😍

[brassmonkey]

Silver Suit Meditation

 

I've noticed lately that a large number of members have been getting very stressed by the things that are going on around them that then can't control.  The crowds when out shopping, family gatherings, school meeting and the like all present times where a person needs to interact, but can be over whelmed by the energy level of the situation. This is the second meditation I teach people when they are serious about doing psychic work.  It is for shielding oneself from overpowering energy and is very effective with  just a little practice. It's called the "Silver Suit".  It is like a space suit that protects you from the overload of emotions that are going on around you, but still allows you to operate at full capacity.

 

You are standing in the middle of a desert of negativity, you are naked and the hot winds of emotion are hitting you from all directions.  Beside you on the ground lies a shiny silver space suit.   It is a one piece jumpsuit.  Say to your self  "I'm going to put on my Silver Suit".  Slowly you slide your foot into one of the boots, the fabric feels cool and you foot slides in easily.  Now you slide in your other foot.  The ground starts to feel very solid below you.  Bending down you start to pull one leg of the suit up and then the other.  It feels cool and reassuring as it slides over your skin.  It fits perfectly as you pull it up around your waist.  You can feel a cool strength coming from it as the heat of the emotions starts to drop away.  

 

Reaching back you slip one arm into the arm of the suit, then the other.  Pulling the suit around you, you can feel the negative emotions dropping away.  Pulling the front zipper closed you enter a cocoon of protection.  There is a helmet sitting beside you.  Picking it up you place it over your head.  It slides on comfortably and and snaps in place around the collar.  Taking a last look at the desert outside you reach up and snap the visor closed.  All the negative emotion around you is now being reflected by the suit and can  not affect you.  The suit will stay in place until it is no longer needed and then disappear. When you feel the need for it again just slide it on for full protection.  With practice just saying the words "I am putting on my Silver Suit" will cause it to appear around you.

 

This is the bare bones of the meditation.  It is very easy to fill in details of putting the suit on, the feelings and sensations.  It is best to keep the whole thing fairly simple so that each time you preform it you can do it the same way.  Always start with the phrase "I'm going to put on my Silver Suit" this is the key phrase.  It should work from the first time you try it and will grow in effectiveness the more it is repeated.  After a while just saying the key phrase will start a subconscious reaction of putting on the suit and you won't even have to do the entire meditation.

 

 

[Longroadhome]

Thank you I will certainly try it out at work where I feel the most stress st times. 

[brassmonkey]

Well I had the kidney stone removed yesterday during a two hour operation. They say it went quite smoothly, broke it to bits with ultrasound and then blasted the big ones with a laser and washed everything out. As sore as I am it feels like they sent in a squad of Storm troopers who stomped all over everything and blasted everything in sight.  Slept for 20 hours only waking up every 45 minutes to try and use the loo. Not going to be doing much for the next few days.  But at least it's finally over with and I can start to get on with things again.  I've been up for about an hour now and its just about time for a nap.

[Frogie]

1 hour ago, brassmonkey said:

Well I had the kidney stone removed yesterday during a two hour operation. They say it went quite smoothly, broke it to bits with ultrasound and then blasted the big ones with a laser and washed everything out. As sore as I am it feels like they sent in a squad of Storm troopers who stomped all over everything and blasted everything in sight.  Slept for 20 hours only waking up every 45 minutes to try and use the loo. Not going to be doing much for the next few days.  But at least it's finally over with and I can start to get on with things again.  I've been up for about an hour now and its just about time for a nap.

I hope you feel better soon!

 

Are you still on your vacation?

 

Take care,

 Frogie xx

[mdwstrx]

Glad to hear it's behind you!  Feel better soon.  🙏

[Longroadhome]

Wishing you a speedy recovery 😉

[Rosetta]

Oh my.  I hope you feel better in a flash!!

[glasspitcher]

On 5/7/2018 at 3:29 PM, brassmonkey said:

I Think I Have Anhedoina, But I Don’t Care

 

Anhedonia is one of those symptoms that really upsets people, and not with out cause.  It can be very unpleasant and disheartening. It is, however, a very important part of the healing/recovery process and needs to be embraced rather than feared.

 

I experienced anhedonia to some degree for a lot of my time on Paxil and during my taper off of it.  As I have mentioned before, I have done two major up doses while on Paxil. From 20mgai to 30mgai and again from 30mgai to 40mgai.  I first started to notice the anhedonia about a year into the change to 40mgai.  I had been going through a rough patch “life wise” for several years and thought that my lack of caring was due to the cumulative effects of life’s hard knocks.

 

During my downward spiral with the high dose of Paxil, drinking and continued life challenges, the anhediona continued to increase.  About the time I decided to do something about my life I pretty much didn’t care about anything.  I didn’t care enough to care about not caring. Until that flash of insight that set me on the path of righting my life.

It took getting sober and about two and a half years of tapering before I noticed any changes.  Another year and a half would pass before I really saw my emotions start to return.  From there it was a stead climb out of the black hole of emotionlessness. Once I made the jump to “0” things really started to improve. Today I still get small bouts that last for a few hours, but they are nothing like what it was in the beginning.  Now it’s more just normal emotional fluctuations like anyone would experience.

 

So, what did I do to get through it. Not a whole lot. I found that fighting against it only made things a whole lot worse. I found that accepting the anhedonia was much preferable to the alternatives of unrelenting anxiety and panic. I learned to look at anhedonia as a blessing in a way.  Without it I would have been feeling the over whelming panic and anxiety that is so common in WD.  Sure, I wasn't enjoying life, but I wasn't suffering either, and the loss of a happy life to it is only temporary. 

 

When it comes to WD, anhedonia is nature’s way of protecting us from the excruciating experience of constant panic attacks, nonstop anxiety, adrenaline rushes, cortisol spikes, palpitations, suicidal ideation, intrusive thoughts, and the like.  Your mind decides that it is better to feel nothing at all than to be put through the ringer 24/7 with emotions and sensations that wrack the body and soul and slow the healing/recover process to a snail’s pace.  When the mind is allowed to feel nothing, the body is then allowed to relax and direct its energy to where it really needs to be used. This provides for faster more complete healing, less painful WD symptoms and a better quality of life.

 

Yes, anhedonia is no fun.  Primarily because we make it that way.  We all want to regain our feelings as fast as possible.  But we are in a healing situation where the body needs to be allowed to do what it needs to do, because it knows best how to put itself back together.  Once we understand this, accept it, and stop fighting it we will start to heal at a faster rate and life will be much more pleasant as we do so.  

 

You can't fight against it.  This is a drug induced sensation that we have no control over.  Trying to fight it or overcome it just burns a lot of precious energy and causes a huge amount of frustration and anxiety because it doesn't help anything.  The emotions, feelings of joy, happiness, love, and excitement as well as creativity, ambition, and a whole lot more are being chemically suppressed and for the time being are just not accessible. Acceptance of the situation is the best path to follow.  As you reduce your dose further and your body has a chance to heal your emotions and all will slowly start to come back, but it does take a lot of time.

 

One thing I did learn was to look for and cherish all the little moments of joy.  They are popping up all the time but are very fleeting and easily overlooked.  When you look at a flower, instead of thinking "darn, I can't enjoy this flower", watch for the momentary little flash of joy that that flower brings when you first see it, and acknowledge it when it happens.  Stop and try to see the beauty in things, even if you don't feel it. "Wow, the sun on those clouds is really pretty, one day soon I will feel it again".  Stop and recognize the joy/wonder in the scene, but let your body react in its own manner.  This exercise will help reestablish the neural pathways and little by little dig out and strengthen the feelings. It is one of the symptoms that is really good to practice AAF on, as there is nothing you can do about it but live with it as best as you can.  Like a bad house guest, ignore it long enough and it will eventually go away.

 

Anhedonia can be a real relationship challenge.  I went through that for quite some time.  I learned that even though I couldn't call up or experience the feelings they were still there inside, just not accessible.  At the time I had been happily married for 33 years but couldn't summon up any of the feelings I had for my wife.  I mentioned this, and it lead to several "late night discussions".  Once we both understood that it was a manifestation of the drugs things started to improve.  After I had been tapering off of the Paxil for a while the feelings slowly started to show themselves, until, now I am more in love with her then ever.  We celebrated number 39 a couple of months ago.  It's a big test of a relationship, but if the feelings are true in the first place and both people trust each other it is something that can be gotten through and make the relationship all the stronger.

 

Like everything else we feel or don't feel in WD, Anhedonia comes and goes in waves and windows.  It is, however, frequently one of the last things to go.  Some people have it bad until after they jump off, while for others is clears up as they taper.  Given a lifetime, the time spent in ADWD/recovery is insignificant.  We have all had our "life" cruelly taken from us and want it back now.  But to get it back fully we need to let the WD/recovery run its course, put on a brave face, and accept whatever it throws at us, whether we can feel it or not.  With time, the healing will happen and when it knows we are ready, our minds will allow us to feel our full range of emotions again and life will be even better.

 

Are you also talking about anhedonia like months after the last dose? I am very scared I will not get my emotions back. its the worst.

[Nena59]

This is pretty much my last symptom. I also have some brain zaps and haven't fully gotten my sleep to regulate. Anhedonia is really is the worst. I keep thinking that I will never get better, never enjoy the things that I used to. It really scares me and makes me feel useless. It's awful. I don't want to do anything!😟 I used to love to cook, bake, garden, work on house projects...all gone.

I am not a lazy person by any means...I taught school, then home schooled my five kids until they reached high school. I was always busy, busy, not finishing one project without thinking about the next. I go through times of pushing myself to do something and then regret it. My wave, window pattern is different than many people. I feel a less strong difference in the 2. There is very little defined difference. I usually feel better in the evenings...just in time for bed.😬

I now spend a lot of time walking and reading...doesn't take any creativity.

I'm 32 months off a ct of Prozac and wellbutrin that I took for 20 years.

[Longroadhome]

On 5/11/2019 at 7:50 PM, glasspitcher said:

 

Are you also talking about anhedonia like months after the last dose? I am very scared I will not get my emotions back. its the worst.

 

22 hours ago, Nena59 said:

This is pretty much my last symptom. I also have some brain zaps and haven't fully gotten my sleep to regulate. Anhedonia is really is the worst. I keep thinking that I will never get better, never enjoy the things that I used to. It really scares me and makes me feel useless. It's awful. I don't want to do anything!😟 I used to love to cook, bake, garden, work on house projects...all gone.

I am not a lazy person by any means...I taught school, then home schooled my five kids until they reached high school. I was always busy, busy, not finishing one project without thinking about the next. I go through times of pushing myself to do something and then regret it. My wave, window pattern is different than many people. I feel a less strong difference in the 2. There is very little defined difference. I usually feel better in the evenings...just in time for bed.😬

I now spend a lot of time walking and reading...doesn't take any creativity.

I'm 32 months off a ct of Prozac and wellbutrin that I took for 20 years.

 

22 hours ago, Nena59 said:

This is pretty much my last symptom. I also have some brain zaps and haven't fully gotten my sleep to regulate. Anhedonia is really is the worst. I keep thinking that I will never get better, never enjoy the things that I used to. It really scares me and makes me feel useless. It's awful. I don't want to do anything!😟 I used to love to cook, bake, garden, work on house projects...all gone.

I am not a lazy person by any means...I taught school, then home schooled my five kids until they reached high school. I was always busy, busy, not finishing one project without thinking about the next. I go through times of pushing myself to do something and then regret it. My wave, window pattern is different than many people. I feel a less strong difference in the 2. There is very little defined difference. I usually feel better in the evenings...just in time for bed.😬

I now spend a lot of time walking and reading...doesn't take any creativity.

I'm 32 months off a ct of Prozac and wellbutrin that I took for 20 years.

What’s the difference beteeen this and depression Brass monkey ? 

[brassmonkey]

Anhedonia is defined ad the inability to feel joy and happiness.  Around here it is frequently confused with emotional blunting, a side effect of ADs, which makes  it so a person feel nothing at all, not happy, sad, love, lust, just no emotion what so ever, except possibly anger, frustration and fear. 

 

Depression can be viewed as an emotion unto itself or as an emotional reaction to a variety of causes.  It can be characterized by a lack of desire to perform many common functions and a decrease in emotions. A general "not caring" about anything and everything.

 

Short answer:

Anhedonia-- not feeling anything

Depression -- not caring about anything

[glasspitcher]

33 minutes ago, brassmonkey said:

Anhedonia is defined ad the inability to feel joy and happiness.  Around here it is frequently confused with emotional blunting, a side effect of ADs, which makes  it so a person feel nothing at all, not happy, sad, love, lust, just no emotion what so ever, except possibly anger, frustration and fear. 

 

Depression can be viewed as an emotion unto itself or as an emotional reaction to a variety of causes.  It can be characterized by a lack of desire to perform many common functions and a decrease in emotions. A general "not caring" about anything and everything.

 

Short answer:

Anhedonia-- not feeling anything

Depression -- not caring about anything

I am getting suicidal because of the blunting. please help i need some hope.

[Nena59]

Brassmonkey,

Great! Does this mean I'm just depressed? My emotions are definitely blunted, but I have no desire to do anything. I guess I'm both? Am I still in withdrawal or just depressed? Maybe this is my life now😢😢

 

 

[glasspitcher]

29 minutes ago, Nena59 said:

Brassmonkey,

Great! Does this mean I'm just depressed? My emotions are definitely blunted, but I have no desire to do anything. I guess I'm both? Am I still in withdrawal or just depressed? Maybe this is my life now😢😢

 

 

i feel just like this

[brassmonkey]

Hi Glasspitcher-- We're going to need a lot more information before we can tell you anything. If you would fill out a signature block that would be a good start.

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/18343-please-put-your-withdrawal-history-in-your-signature/

 

BTW-- SA is all about tapering off of psych drugs.  We are not qualified to make diagnosis of members conditions.  For that you have to work with your doctor, do research and make your own determination.

[brassmonkey]

Hey Nena-- Like I mentioned to Glasspicture, we can't make that type of determination here.  From your signature (which is way out of date) it looks like you still may be suffering the affects of you CT a few years ago.  If you could bring us up to date on your intro thread (which was last updated two years ago) maybe we could make some helpful suggestions.

[glasspitcher]

31 minutes ago, brassmonkey said:

Hi Glasspitcher-- We're going to need a lot more information before we can tell you anything. If you would fill out a signature block that would be a good start.

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/18343-please-put-your-withdrawal-history-in-your-signature/

 

BTW-- SA is all about tapering off of psych drugs.  We are not qualified to make diagnosis of members conditions.  For that you have to work with your doctor, do research and make your own determination.

I was on Zoloft for 8 months, tapered pretty slow like 3 months of taper, didn't know about the 10% rule. Experienced brain zaps for 3 weeks or whatever. Then went back on escetalopram because I was feeling really sh*tty (dpdr constant anxiety etc). I started the Zoloft though because of DPDR from weed. But the first month of Zoloft was when I noticed I just didnt have motivation anymore and I started to enjoy things I used to enjoy less. Anyway I got off escetalopram pretty slow too, like 2 months from a low dose (5mg). Weird stuff happening through the months, constant feeling of chest tightness, feels like i cannot ever relax, weird moments during the day where I would get anxious for no reason with no anxious thoughts just feelings... and worse of all started to slowly get even more numb and less interested in things the past 2 months. im 6 months off drugs atm.

 

I can't tell cause maybe all of this could be from DPDR. My sister was on escetalopram for 1 year and she got off it with not that much problems, she was the opposite she had too much emotions after stopping it (slow taper but not 10% thing) but after like 6 months her emotions settled back to normal and has not had any side effects or problems since.

 

I just need some hope, its so ******* scary not wanting to do anything just sitting all day. I am scared I will get suicidal. BTW I also have OCD and hypochondria... i mean my hypochondria made me think I had cancer back in the day and even would have pains and stuff happening that would make me think even more it was like my mind was actually trying to simulate the cancer. Maybe that is what is going on? The constant worry and stuff maybe my mind is just simulating the lack of feelings or motivation? It's all so ******* weird and confusing.

[brassmonkey]

Just making some notes for  my own reference.  I have had a big uptick in my visual migraines since the first of the year.  I had several while we were traveling and even more once we got home.  Two weeks ago I awoke from a dream to find I was having one in the middle of the night.  My vision while dreaming was clear but once awake the aura was quite plain.  I had back to back ones a couple of weeks ago during the day and again yesterday back to back.  Just finished having another today. Mostly they are right handed but a couple have been left. In the past they have only been silver and black but the past several have been adding color to the mix.  They don't progress to headaches, but leave me tired for several hours.

[Alua]

Interesting brass, at 2.5 years off I have been having migraine with aura every couple of weeks for the past few months. I also woke in the middle of the night from a dream with one which was most unusual. Mine lately have also not progressed to anything that a couple of panadol cant control. I have a slightly sore head and just feel off after one. My vision has been very erratic since the migraines started. I was blaming my hormone replacement but perhaps this is just wd normal at this stage. Since being off I had probably 3 in the first two years and i reckon I've had about 6 in the last 3 months.

 

Peace and solidarity.

[brassmonkey]

I think I've mentioned this before, but this time it's meant with a lot of positive responses so I will repost it here so it will become part of the Tao.  Many people express concern that their life has been ruined by ADWD.  My feeling is, only if you let it and explain it this way:

 

Many years ago when I was in film school I took a course in writing and directing motion pictures.  One of the main points that was made during the course was "there is the film you imagine in your mind, the film you write and the film that actually gets produced". Over the course of my life I have learned that this is more than true for the "life you actually live".  For people making it through ADWD, we are being given a very valuable second chance at life.  We have had our lives cruelly ripped apart down to the very foundations, but now we get to rebuild them with a much greater knowledge of just what is important and what isn't.  We also have developed an inner strength that is amazing.  After ADWD nothing will be this hard ever again.  So please don't convince yourself that your life is ruined. It is changed, yes, and not what you planned, but the possibilities, oh the possibilities, and we just have to take control and make them happen.

[Sottana]

Thank you Brass. I really needed to read this today. 

 

Anthony 

 

[elbee]

23 hours ago, brassmonkey said:

Many years ago when I was in film school I took a course in writing and directing motion pictures.  One of the main points that was made during the course was "there is the film you imagine in your mind, the film you write and the film that actually gets produced". Over the course of my life I have learned that this is more than true for the "life you actually live".  For people making it through ADWD, we are being given a very valuable second chance at life.  We have had our lives cruelly ripped apart down to the very foundations, but now we get to rebuild them with a much greater knowledge of just what is important and what isn't.  We also have developed an inner strength that is amazing.  After ADWD nothing will be this hard ever again.  So please don't convince yourself that your life is ruined. It is changed, yes, and not what you planned, but the possibilities, oh the possibilities, and we just have to take control and make them happen.

 

Thanks Brass! 👍👍👍