trying21 Need some advice

[trying21]

1997 - (was 18yrs old)- Diagnosed with panic attacks and prescribed paxil, I believe it was 30mg.  Tried multiple time to come off but would get the electric shocks within a day or 2.  Was told it was not possible what I was feeling and that it was most likely the anxiety coming back.  So, I stayed on the meds.

 

2005- Was determined to come off meds.  Very fast taper, I believe in 2 weeks and just let all the initial symptoms happen like the electric shocks.  Within weeks or a month started getting extreme panic all over body with muscle twitches in legs, Heart palpitations, vision issues (not exactly blurry but slow response from eyes to brain) Couldn’t deal with any stressors.

 

Had to come of work, saw many drs all tests were normal.  Many different foods and other things brought about more symptoms especially heart pounding.  I don’t have any notes, so this is all from memory. After giving up and not coping I tried going back on AD (Celexa 30mg).  Within weeks I was symptom free.

 

2015- (years before this was getting very angry episodes that was not normal for me that continued till this point also would drink heavily on weekends, it felt like it reset me to deal with another week and so on.) Started getting visual issues, like my eyes were slow to get info to brain (All eye exams were normal). General dizziness, vertical imbalance (felt like I would fall over) when I would look up.  Driving became very difficult especially on highways.  I would continually hit the brakes for no reason, like my body panicked it wasn’t seeing right and general fatigue. 

 

2015 – Through a psychiatrist it was determined that my anxiety was coming back and that I needed to up my dose.  This time frame is a little fuzzy, so my exact details and doses might be off, but it is generally correct.  Upped dose to 40mgs Celexa with no results.  The next thing was to try another medication.  I tapered quickly off celexa (no withdrawal symptoms that I remember) and on to Effexor (mid range dose), stayed on that for a month or 2 again with no help.  My Psychiatrist asked me what helped me before and not knowing at this time what happened to me after taking paxil (Prolonged withdrawal) I told him Paxil.  So, I switched to Paxil and eventually got to 40mgs. 

 

This time I did get withdrawal symptoms from Effexor, brain zaps that eventually went away after I started paxil.  I stayed on paxil for about a year, but it wasn’t helping either, so I was going to come off it and start another medication (I believe it was clomipramine).  My taper was 40mg-30mg 2 weeks 30mg-20mg 2 weeks etc…  By the time I got to 20mg I was in full withdrawal.  Muscle twitches, major obsessive thoughts, whole body panic, pins and needles all over, insomnia etc.…  Dr agreed these were withdrawal symptoms and prescribed both diazepam and clonazepam, see which work better and use that until symptoms get less (I used these vary little and never longer than 4 days at a time without at least a week break in between). 

 

By this time everything came back to me, what happened to me in 2005 wasn’t mental illness it was withdrawal and I got lucky with the celexa fixing it.  By this time, I found your website and read Glenmullens book.  I thought I was through most of my wd’s and I knew last time I switched over to celexa it helped.  So, I made the switch from Paxil back to Celexa, even though I was never stable after I dropped the Paxil (July 18, 2016 I stopped paxil-started keeping notes at this point) I ended up on 20mg Celexa but still was not stable and had most original Paxil WD symptoms. 

 

2016-Present – My notes say I’m not doing well but I don’t know if this is still Paxil WD or celexa side effects so reduced from 20mg-15mg (Sept 2017) and waited till Dec 22 to reduce from 20mg-10mg.  Again, still experiencing all previous WD symptoms.  At 10mg is where I decided I am not doing well so don’t do anything until I feel stable.

 

 I didn’t change anything in terms of meds and fully crashed on April 7 where I woke up in full panic mode with very bad shakes, constant thoughts of looking for answers and my same other WD symptoms.  I went to emerg where everything was normal and saw a crisis nurse where I said if nothing is wrong with me this must be from SSRI withdrawal which she didn’t believe and said I needed rest and to take some diazepam.  I have tried small doses of diazepam of 2.5mg and 5mg where I now find it might make me worse. 

 

I am looking for any suggestions you may have, I decided to try and switch to liquid Prozac to see if that can help.  I am in such a panic mode I am scared to do anything but as I am now missing work I need to try.   Last thing I can add is in the last 2 years I have seen a neurologist and optometrist.  The optometrist in her tests has diagnosed Binocular Vision Dysfunction (like I have a concussion) and believes that most likely I had this before SSRI’s and they might have masked it or possibly they are causing it.  The neurologist after I explained my entire story believes this to be possibly prolong SSRI withdrawal and referred me to a neuro optometrist and a cannabis clinic (To use as a crutch instead of alcohol as I get through this.  They gave me CBD oil (type of cannabis that has little to no THC, which I find doesn’t help but im scared of everything so its hard to tell).  I’m currently to nauseous and sick to drink alcohol anyway. 

 

Current Medications

10mg Celexa

12mg/3ml Liquid Prozac (Started at 4mg for 3 days and now at 12mg after ten days.  Trying to switch to prozac to see if it helps)

20mg/25mg Zestorectic (For High Blood pressure combo of lisinopril and hydrochlorothiazide)

400mg metformin twice a day.  Just started  

AD History

1997 – 2005 Paxil 30mgs

2005-2015 Celexa 30mgs

2015-2 months of Effexor

2016- Paxil 40mg

Edited April 30, 2018 by Altostrata
added paragraph spacing

[SkyBlue]

Hello, Trying, and welcome to SA. You are in a good place to learn and get support for your situation. 

 

I will follow up in a minute with some links to key topics on the site. 

 

Generally we are very cautious about supplements, and people have had a lot of difficulty with CBD oil. Of course, everyone is different. 

[SkyBlue]

6 hours ago, trying21 said:

2016-Present – My notes say I’m not doing well but I don’t know if this is still Paxil WD or celexa side effects so reduced from 20mg-15mg (Sept 2017) and waited till Dec 22 to reduce from 20mg-10mg.  Again, still experiencing all previous WD symptoms.  At 10mg is where I decided I am not doing well so don’t do anything until I feel stable.

 I didn’t change anything in terms of meds and fully crashed on April 7 

 

 I have tried small doses of diazepam of 2.5mg and 5mg where I now find it might make me worse.  I am looking for any suggestions you may have, I decided to try and switch to liquid Prozac to see if that can help. 

 

 

Hello, Trying, 

 

Again, welcome. This will be your very own topic where you can ask questions, post updates and progress, etc. 

 

Can you clarify what you were taking immediately before crashing on April 7? You said you hadn't made any changes --  

What and when was the most recent reduction--and was that a reduction in Paxil or Celexa?

 

Knowing this will help us determine what we're dealing with.

 

Also, please create a "signature" here:  Account Settings – Create or Edit a signature. This will let people see at a glance where you're at with dosages, etc. 

You can probably just copy and paste the brief Current Medications and AD History lists you included above.

Edited May 1, 2018 by SkyBlue
deleted blank lines after post

[trying21]

(Dec 22 went from 15mg celexa to 10mg celexa) From Dec 22 to April 7 was on 10mg celexa.  Occasionally during  that time would use diazapam or clonazapam.  Never more than 3 days at a time.  I did have some major life outside stressors that I am sure havent helped.  I was currently holding when everything got very bad again.  Dizziness/pins and needles, nauceous, vision worse (hasnt been right for years now), extreme fear all over (why I went to emerg)  

[Altostrata]

Welcome, trying.

 

I am very sorry you're in this situation. You have had severe withdrawal syndrome numerous times. Your nervous system is destabilized from going on and off drugs. It is sensitized to drugs and probably some supplements and foods.

 

You've been taking 10mg Celexa since late December? How has your symptom pattern changed? Did you feel better on 15mg or 20mg Celexa?

[trying21]

Thanks Altostrata and Skyblue for your replies. Looking back on my notes it didn’t seem like I was stable on 15mg or 20mg celexa. So I decided to try 10mg and hold in case what I was feeling was side effects from celexa. I believe looking back after my original long time on celexa 2005-2016) during the last few years I was experiencing a poop out with withdrawals/side effects. 

[trying21]

I meant to add that’s why I have decided to try switching to Prozac instead of increasing the celexa again. This has stopped me from working so I had to try something besides holding at 10mg celexa. 

[Altostrata]

Not clear what you're up to. Your signature says you're taking 5mg Celexa. Are you also taking Prozac?

 

I have no idea if another drug switch will help or hurt. The fewer drug switches, the better. They're very stressful on your nervous system.

[trying21]

My apologies I am sure I am not being very clear but first thanks for your support and please bare with me as I will have a lot of questions. What I originally stated about late December till April 7 is correct I was on 10mg of celexa and nothing else besides very occasional benzo use and alcohol on my non work days. I was hoping I would improve but I wasn’t so I decided to try and switch to Prozac. On April 22nd I started with 4mg of liquid Prozac and have increased it slowly with no adverse effects while I cut celexa in half. So currently I am on 5mg celexa and 12mg Prozac. My end goal is to be at 16mg Prozac and no celexa

[trying21]

Altostrata does this make sense now?

[SkyBlue]

16 hours ago, trying21 said:

My apologies I am sure I am not being very clear but first thanks for your support and please bare with me as I will have a lot of questions. What I originally stated about late December till April 7 is correct I was on 10mg of celexa and nothing else besides very occasional benzo use and alcohol on my non work days. I was hoping I would improve but I wasn’t so I decided to try and switch to Prozac. On April 22nd I started with 4mg of liquid Prozac and have increased it slowly with no adverse effects while I cut celexa in half. So currently I am on 5mg celexa and 12mg Prozac. My end goal is to be at 16mg Prozac and no celexa

 

So you crashed April 7, 

April 22 started liquid Prozac and have been increasing it,

So you haven't had any adverse effects since April 22?

 

How are you doing now?

Like Alto said, any changes are stressful on the system and the fewer changes, the better. 

 

Do you feel comfortable enough right now to hold where you are?

 

 

 

[trying21]

I feel like I haven't changed since the crash on the 7th even with the addition of the prozac and the reduction of the celexa. I was so bad on the 7th though that it is hard to tell.  Today though has been terrible.  I have pins and needles everywhere, panic all over very upset, normal vision issues with extra dizziness.  I did see my dr to get a note for being off work which is just aggravating everything i am sure.  So currently I am in bad shape, do you mean hold at my current dosage of 12mg prozac and 5mg celexa?  The reason I even introduced the prozac is because I was so uncomfortable I had to try something.  What coping strategies have you used when your is such as state as I am now?  

 

When I added Prozac I started with 4mg then if no different or worsening symptoms I added another 4mg after 4 days till where I am now at 12mg Prozac and 5mg celexa(I decreased 5mg celexa on the 7th day of starting Prozac)

[SkyBlue]

8 hours ago, trying21 said:

I feel like I haven't changed since the crash on the 7th even with the addition of the prozac and the reduction of the celexa. I was so bad on the 7th though that it is hard to tell.  Today though has been terrible.  I have pins and needles everywhere, panic all over very upset, normal vision issues with extra dizziness.  

 

So currently I am in bad shape, do you mean hold at my current dosage of 12mg prozac and 5mg celexa?  The reason I even introduced the prozac is because I was so uncomfortable I had to try something.  What coping strategies have you used when your is such as state as I am now?  

 

When I added Prozac I started with 4mg then if no different or worsening symptoms I added another 4mg after 4 days till where I am now at 12mg Prozac and 5mg celexa(I decreased 5mg celexa on the 7th day of starting Prozac)

 

It's really up to you whether to hold or not. We really can't advise dosages, etc. The benefit to choosing a dosage and sticking with it would be to try to keep things stable.

It sounds like there have been a lot of changes, so I would reiterate Alto's statement above: "The fewer drug switches, the better."

 

Adding, decreasing, etc are all very stressful to the system and can destabilize a person more. 

 

As far as managing symptoms, there are a lot of good ideas in the Symptoms and Self-Care section of the forum. 
One really useful thread is: http://survivingantidepressants.org/topic/1112-non-drug-techniques-to-cope-with-emotional-symptoms/

 

 

I would encourage you to decide on a dosage and hold, not making any changes, for a while until you are more stable.