methuselah: Hi all! Brief intro and advice?

[methuselah]

Hi @Shep

 

I've been tapering Prozac since December of 2021 and been holding since Dec 1 2022.  I haven't tapered much, say 25% of starting dose in that time period, though have had other things happen that complicate my life and timeline (decent summary above in my post dated Jan 3 2023). I'm at a place where i really can't tell if it's the drugs or the withdrawal.  Again, i haven't tapered that much imho but feel pretty rough much of the time.  Physically I'm ok for the most part save cold and chills especially after eating, but mentally i'm sort of a wreck...it basically always feels like i smoked too much marijuana or something with DP/DR,,, anxiety, strange thoughts, some depression and low mood, blurry vision, sped up feeling sometimes. Nights are better sometimes. 

 

All that to say, i'm wondering if there is a way that you know of to test if what i'm feeling is actually withdrawal or withdrawal normal, or actual effects of the drug?  What i can say with almost certainly is that the drug is not providing any benefit save keeping me from extreme withdrawal symptoms. 

 

I've read here A LOT, spoken to some folks that are arguably experts in this field as it were, but none of my research or discussions yield any semi-definitive answer to what's happening.  I'm scared to cut at this point as i don't want to ruin progress from the hold if there is some.  But perhaps a small cut will tell the story, or hold longer, or i just have to keep cutting and keep going until this thing plays itself out.  I have a son i have 50% of the time and have to work and that sort of thing, so plowing ahead with 10% monthly cuts, as much as i'd like to, isn't really an option.   I'm pretty much lost here, in a nutshell.  

 

Any feedback you can provide is very much appreciated.  Perhaps i could take the next 3 days of notes and dump those into my thread and that may help.

 

 

[Shep]

12 hours ago, methuselah said:

All that to say, i'm wondering if there is a way that you know of to test if what i'm feeling is actually withdrawal or withdrawal normal, or actual effects of the drug?  What i can say with almost certainly is that the drug is not providing any benefit save keeping me from extreme withdrawal symptoms. 

 

If you were dealing with side effects of the drug, you would feel better as you taper, since there is less of the drug in your symptom. 

 

If you're feeling worse, it's either withdrawal or battle fatigue. You don't have to have severe symptoms to get run down by battle fatigue. Even mild symptoms over long periods of time can weigh people down. 

 

So ruling out side effects, you're left with withdrawal of battle fatigue. If it's withdrawal, holding will help. If it's battle fatigue, you may want to see if you can take some time off of work and get more downtime if possible. 

[methuselah]

Hi @Shep  thanks for the response.  Well.  I can’t say I’m feeling any better with the taper.  Sometimes I do and feel more like a human but others times I don’t and feel dissociated among other unpleasant things. So I guess it’s not side effects….?  My gut is screaming that some of this is the action of the drug messing with my mind. Side effect, paradoxical effect, semantics at this point. 

 

Battle fatigue is absolutely in play here, these things have been going on for some time now with benzo taper and discontinuation, and before that drug switches etc.  I assume battle fatigue in this instance could and would exacerbate wd type symptoms?

 

If you had to make a best guess, what would you say is the best thing for me to do?  Continue to hold for another month or two and see if things clear up a bit more or move forward with a small 1-2% drop and see what happens?  
 

In parallel, I can’t take off work bc I just can’t.  It’s not overly stressful and does provide distraction which can be of some benefit. I work from home most days which can be good, and bad.  I do, and will continue to practice self care, exercise regularly, and eat very healthy - whole foods mostly, some meditation.
 

thanks again, I really appreciate your time

 

[Shep]

18 hours ago, methuselah said:

If you had to make a best guess, what would you say is the best thing for me to do?  Continue to hold for another month or two and see if things clear up a bit more or move forward with a small 1-2% drop and see what happens?  

 

Here is a good way to tell what it's okay to taper again:

 

Withdrawal Normal

 

A then when you do resume your taper, your idea to go with a small 1-2% reduction sounds good. If you're not already doing so, you may want to use the Brassmonkey Slide:

 

The Brassmonkey Slide Method of Micro-tapering

[conkaia]

On 1/4/2023 at 2:21 AM, methuselah said:

Nov 24 2021- withdrawal type reaction to presumably bad batch or expired batch of generic liquid fluoxetine triggers an early start to my ssri taper.  Was holding due to what i believed was protracted benzo withdrawal, which was improving, brought on by several day overindulgence in alcohol 3 months post taper when feeling pretty much back to normal.

 

I've literally just gone back into a wave after overindulging in alcohol, thinking I was back to normal.  Intrusive thoughts are through the roof again.  I hope you're feeling better now.

[Believer]

Hey @methuselah,

Its been awhile, how have you been doing?