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4freedom: Cold turkey off Cymbalta


4freedom

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Hi, I'm new to this site, wanted to share my story...Severe depression and lack of resources and coping skills landed me in a hospital for overdose on pills (suicide attempt) at the age of 15. I tried to "be good" and never try to do that again, but around the age of 18, I tried again to end my life with pills.

 

My best friend called the ambulance and I denied everything, the EMTs insisted they'd take me to an institution to be checked...I can't quite remember the rest, but I know I wasn't admitted to the institution and I continued to deny that I was suicidal.

 

Possibly about 6 months later, I checked myself into a public mental institution because I believed I was crazy because I just couldn't seem to cope with life and wanted to die. The institution did not want to admit me, saying I was not crazy...but I begged to be let in because I couldn't handle society - after three days (observation), I realized what crazy really was...

 

I also read a book called, "Codependency No More", and this helped me have a new lease on life for a while. At that time, the psychiatrist at this institution, started me on Zoloft. After the weird 6 week period, I felt like a normal person. The constant negative thoughts were blocked.

 

From the age of 17 to 19, I was in and out of a teen runaway shelter and my parents home. At 18, I rented my first apartment with a friend. It became a place to party and one of our many friends took all of my anti-depressants in a suicide attempt - this is the first time I experienced serious withdrawal from anything. I became lethargic, skipped work, lost my job, lost my apartment.

 

I never wanted that to happen again, to be that dependent on a drug. I built myself up again with Christ's help. I rented a room from a 26 year old. I continued to party casually and have as much fun as possible, but tried not to be too crazy.

 

At the age of 20, I started having nightmares that included demons, so I prayed God would lead me to a church.

 

Missionaries stopped by my house within days and were surprised that I so willingly invited them in. I was baptized for the 3rd time in my life (1st - catholic baby, 2nd - baptist at about 8, 3rd - Mormon at about 20).

 

For three years, I was extremely happy. I put God first, sought to love Him with all my heart. I got married to a man who had converted to my church.

 

Within months, this man told me he didn't believe in God. It shattered things for me. I could not convince him otherwise, yet he uncovered doubts in my mind.

 

Wavering, I slipped back into some old ways and a darkening of my outlook. I dropped my relationship with the Mormon church altogether and I was pissed at God.

 

Even though we had both talked about not having children before marriage, I found myself wanting to start a family about 6 months after marriage. My husband didn't agree.

 

Even though he shouldn't be forced into having a family, I found my depression getting deeper and deeper. I slept a lot when I wasn't working, I wanted to escape from life a lot and found it to have little meaning.

 

At the age of 24, I was the cause of a severe car accident where both of the people in the other car were severely injured. It affected me deeply. Then, I was laid off from a dental assisting job I had because the dentist was convicted of medicaid fraud.

 

I found myself working as a shift manager at a fast food restaurant. At the age of around 28 or 29, I found myself severely depressed again and checked myself into the hospital before any attempt on ending my life myself.

 

I lost track of how many times I went on and off of anti-depressants or had close calls with severe depression and suicidal idealation. Going off of them was always bad and would wind me up in a horrible depression.

 

...with that being said, I am now almost 38. I've been part of a church for 5 years now. I've been in weekly therapy for over 10 months in a row this past year. I had ptsd therapy. I dealt with a lot of root problems. I never had the intensive, consistent therapy I needed to get to the roots of these problems before, in 2011 I had it. I had been to counseling before, which always helped...but it didn't last long as financially I wasn't established. I also thought that asking for help was a weakness.

 

This past year, along with being professionally counseled by a master addiction counselor (I figured he'd be good to understand my childhood family where alcoholism was rampant), I found ala-non which helped me a lot with addressing current issues with the alcoholism from my childhood family. What a resource that was and is!

 

Then, in November, I was introduced to Celebrate Recovery, a Christ centered recovery group for habits, hang-ups and addictions. I started writing a gratitude list daily and putting all my anxieties into a prayer jar.

 

My work situation has been difficult and my company raised insurance premiums effective Jan, 2012. I dropped my insurance because I just couldn't afford it.

 

Through a series of events, I couldn't get my anti-depressant prescription(cymbalta)at the pharmacy (I live in a very cold climate and it was actually 40 below in Jan.), my car wouldn't start, it was extremely cold and it was all I could do as far as my comfort level to bum rides from my husband and others.

 

I did ask my husband to pick up my prescription a few times, but his work was crazy busy at the time and to make a long story shorter...I didn't have my anti-depressants for a while.

 

This had happened once before in November when I went to help with a wedding out of town. The same symptoms, nausea/vomiting, minimal sleep needed, ranting and raving, crying...yep all that...but I thought, I've gone 6 days now without it, why not just get off of it and see if I can be done with it?

 

It's not that I think anti-depressants are wrong...it's just that I don't want to HAVE to be on a medicine if I don't have to be on a medicine...will all of the therapy I've received and the new resources I have pay off??? I think so.

 

It's been over 3 weeks since I went off and I'm much happier. I did it cold turkey, not exactly on purpose. If anyone does this, not recommended, but if you are doing it for some reason - do it with your eyes wide open. There are going to be serious side effects, know them all. Go on-line, read other people's stories, horror and all from going cold turkey.

 

If you haven't had intense counseling or have really solved the root problems, I would not go off your anti-depressants unless you absolutely have to.

 

..so 3 weeks later and life is much better. I was more depressed on anti-depressants than not. I now am allowing myself to be the person God created me to be and live life fully.

 

My husband looks at me funny and is concerned because I've been speaking directly in my dealings with him and others and he's not used to it. I personally think he's used to me being ill and doesn't know what to do now that I'm not.

 

I'm highly into God and believes He is moving in our lives, my husband doesn't think so and wants me not to believe the way I do or talk the way I do. Jesus Christ has given me a lovely life and freed me from the chains, ropes and glue of depression and I'm not afraid to say it out loud.

 

Administrator, please put this post wherever it would offend the least. Thanks for giving me the opportunity to share. Also, I turned back to the way I was before I got married and am a vegetarian again, this might have helped with not as bad of withdrawals as some people have.

Edited by Altostrata
added paragraph breaks
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  • Administrator

Hello, 4freedom. I moved your post here as your Introduction topic.

 

I added paragraph breaks -- a long post without breaks is hard for people to read.

 

Good to hear you're doing well although you cold-turkeyed. How long had you been taking Cymbalta?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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Hi, I'm new to this site, wanted to share my story...Severe depression and lack of resources and coping skills landed me in a hospital for overdose on pills (suicide attempt) at the age of 15. I tried to "be good" and never try to do that again, but around the age of 18, I tried again to end my life with pills.

 

My best friend called the ambulance and I denied everything, the EMTs insisted they'd take me to an institution to be checked...I can't quite remember the rest, but I know I wasn't admitted to the institution and I continued to deny that I was suicidal.

 

Possibly about 6 months later, I checked myself into a public mental institution because I believed I was crazy because I just couldn't seem to cope with life and wanted to die. The institution did not want to admit me, saying I was not crazy...but I begged to be let in because I couldn't handle society - after three days (observation), I realized what crazy really was...

 

I also read a book called, "Codependency No More", and this helped me have a new lease on life for a while. At that time, the psychiatrist at this institution, started me on Zoloft. After the weird 6 week period, I felt like a normal person. The constant negative thoughts were blocked.

 

From the age of 17 to 19, I was in and out of a teen runaway shelter and my parents home. At 18, I rented my first apartment with a friend. It became a place to party and one of our many friends took all of my anti-depressants in a suicide attempt - this is the first time I experienced serious withdrawal from anything. I became lethargic, skipped work, lost my job, lost my apartment.

 

I never wanted that to happen again, to be that dependent on a drug. I built myself up again with Christ's help. I rented a room from a 26 year old. I continued to party casually and have as much fun as possible, but tried not to be too crazy.

 

At the age of 20, I started having nightmares that included demons, so I prayed God would lead me to a church.

 

Missionaries stopped by my house within days and were surprised that I so willingly invited them in. I was baptized for the 3rd time in my life (1st - catholic baby, 2nd - baptist at about 8, 3rd - Mormon at about 20).

 

For three years, I was extremely happy. I put God first, sought to love Him with all my heart. I got married to a man who had converted to my church.

 

Within months, this man told me he didn't believe in God. It shattered things for me. I could not convince him otherwise, yet he uncovered doubts in my mind.

 

Wavering, I slipped back into some old ways and a darkening of my outlook. I dropped my relationship with the Mormon church altogether and I was pissed at God.

 

Even though we had both talked about not having children before marriage, I found myself wanting to start a family about 6 months after marriage. My husband didn't agree.

 

Even though he shouldn't be forced into having a family, I found my depression getting deeper and deeper. I slept a lot when I wasn't working, I wanted to escape from life a lot and found it to have little meaning.

 

At the age of 24, I was the cause of a severe car accident where both of the people in the other car were severely injured. It affected me deeply. Then, I was laid off from a dental assisting job I had because the dentist was convicted of medicaid fraud.

 

I found myself working as a shift manager at a fast food restaurant. At the age of around 28 or 29, I found myself severely depressed again and checked myself into the hospital before any attempt on ending my life myself.

 

I lost track of how many times I went on and off of anti-depressants or had close calls with severe depression and suicidal idealation. Going off of them was always bad and would wind me up in a horrible depression.

 

...with that being said, I am now almost 38. I've been part of a church for 5 years now. I've been in weekly therapy for over 10 months in a row this past year. I had ptsd therapy. I dealt with a lot of root problems. I never had the intensive, consistent therapy I needed to get to the roots of these problems before, in 2011 I had it. I had been to counseling before, which always helped...but it didn't last long as financially I wasn't established. I also thought that asking for help was a weakness.

 

This past year, along with being professionally counseled by a master addiction counselor (I figured he'd be good to understand my childhood family where alcoholism was rampant), I found ala-non which helped me a lot with addressing current issues with the alcoholism from my childhood family. What a resource that was and is!

 

Then, in November, I was introduced to Celebrate Recovery, a Christ centered recovery group for habits, hang-ups and addictions. I started writing a gratitude list daily and putting all my anxieties into a prayer jar.

 

My work situation has been difficult and my company raised insurance premiums effective Jan, 2012. I dropped my insurance because I just couldn't afford it.

 

Through a series of events, I couldn't get my anti-depressant prescription(cymbalta)at the pharmacy (I live in a very cold climate and it was actually 40 below in Jan.), my car wouldn't start, it was extremely cold and it was all I could do as far as my comfort level to bum rides from my husband and others.

 

I did ask my husband to pick up my prescription a few times, but his work was crazy busy at the time and to make a long story shorter...I didn't have my anti-depressants for a while.

 

This had happened once before in November when I went to help with a wedding out of town. The same symptoms, nausea/vomiting, minimal sleep needed, ranting and raving, crying...yep all that...but I thought, I've gone 6 days now without it, why not just get off of it and see if I can be done with it?

 

It's not that I think anti-depressants are wrong...it's just that I don't want to HAVE to be on a medicine if I don't have to be on a medicine...will all of the therapy I've received and the new resources I have pay off??? I think so.

 

It's been over 3 weeks since I went off and I'm much happier. I did it cold turkey, not exactly on purpose. If anyone does this, not recommended, but if you are doing it for some reason - do it with your eyes wide open. There are going to be serious side effects, know them all. Go on-line, read other people's stories, horror and all from going cold turkey.

 

If you haven't had intense counseling or have really solved the root problems, I would not go off your anti-depressants unless you absolutely have to.

 

..so 3 weeks later and life is much better. I was more depressed on anti-depressants than not. I now am allowing myself to be the person God created me to be and live life fully.

 

My husband looks at me funny and is concerned because I've been speaking directly in my dealings with him and others and he's not used to it. I personally think he's used to me being ill and doesn't know what to do now that I'm not.

 

I'm highly into God and believes He is moving in our lives, my husband doesn't think so and wants me not to believe the way I do or talk the way I do. Jesus Christ has given me a lovely life and freed me from the chains, ropes and glue of depression and I'm not afraid to say it out loud.

 

Administrator, please put this post wherever it would offend the least. Thanks for giving me the opportunity to share. Also, I turned back to the way I was before I got married and am a vegetarian again, this might have helped with not as bad of withdrawals as some people have.

 

hi there,

 

Nice to meet you here. I hope things are going well. How is the weather in Alaska? I would love to go there one day!

 

I suggest you look through the forums for info on withdrawal. You can find some good info. Since you stopped cold turkey, you may end up relapsing as so many others have. This is just how it works for many, but no all. So, if you relapse, perhaps you can go back to a small dose and start to taper. You could also seek out an alternative or integrative doctor who will help you get off the drugs, search for any underlying issues, and hopefully keep you off drugs indefinitely. Have you had any checkups to check your thyroid or other hormones? I think its great you are involved with the church, this will keep you filled with hope and you can get through many things like this.

Various SSRIs/SNRIs 7- 1/2 years

Went Cold Turkey from Celexa 2011, Stayed Off

Psych Drug Free and Loving Life (over 6 years and counting)

 

How I Stay Well: Diet, exercise, meditation, supplements, etc

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  • Administrator

Kinda true, Zepp. People don't "relapse" -- they suffer intolerable withdrawal symptoms. Withdrawal is an entirely different beast than relapse.

 

Going back on a low amount of the drug relieves the symptoms; easing off via slowly tapering can finally complete the project of quitting.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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