I really just want to believe in something

[Rbvdk]

I want to believe in God and that a higher power is looking out for us and will make sure that what happens to us, it'll never be too unbearable for us. That they'll take care of us and give us signs and answers when we pray or ask for it. I want to believe in something powerful that cares but it's hard when prayers seem to go unanswered and there's no ''signs'' or anything, just emptiness, anxiety and the withdrawals. I'm trying to get into crystal healing and just anything spiritual at all because I'm hoping that something is real and I'm hoping it'll help and guide me. I wish so much there was a higher power that guided us through hard times to make the right decisions so the wrong decision doesn't end up completely ruining our lives. Then I just think, if there was something like that, then would any of us be here (getting withdrawals from going too fast or going CT etc)? or would anyone make life-threatening decisions? Because if there was a higher power that cared, wouldn't it stop those things from happening by guiding us to make the right decision, stopping before making the bad decision or giving us better intuition to know what's going to go well and what's not (by that 'gut feeling')? I don't really know much about God or spirituality but I just wish I could believe enough to have some comfort at least, if not answers. I guess I want to ask anyone who believes in God and finds a lot of comfort in him, why you feel like that? Have you ever had any signs from God or miracles? I think hearing peoples experiences might help me have some faith too. If not God then any spiritual/healing power that gives you comfort, I'd love to hear from anyone.

[ChessieCat]

Believing and trusting in God isn't like having a magic genie who you can call on to make things better.  We are all born with a sinful nature (original sin from Adam) that causes us to be separated from God.  There is nothing that we can do by our works to make ourselves right with God.  God sent His only begotten son, Jesus, who died in our place and was resurrected.  When we accept what Jesus did and repent of our sinful nature (for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God) we become God's children.  God promises us eternal life with Him in the hereafter.  The alternative is eternal damnation and separation from God.  This is the comfort that I have.

 

Ephesians 2 (KJC)

 

1And you has he quickened, who were dead in trespasses and sins; 2Wherein in time past you walked according to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that now works in the children of disobedience: 3Among whom also we all had our conversation in times past in the lusts of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind; and were by nature the children of wrath, even as others. 4But God, who is rich in mercy, for his great love with which he loved us, 5Even when we were dead in sins, has quickened us together with Christ, (by grace you are saved;) 6And has raised us up together, and made us sit together in heavenly places in Christ Jesus: 7That in the ages to come he might show the exceeding riches of his grace in his kindness toward us through Christ Jesus. 8For by grace are you saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: 9Not of works, lest any man should boast.10For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to good works, which God has before ordained that we should walk in them.

[xyz]

every passes, nothing last.

sometimes when we are at the pivot point in our life, we don't see it. all we see is suffering.

it takes perspective to understand how much this can change us. people who have recovered said that these were the most trial but teaching moments of their life.

it has changed them in a better way- they understand the true meaning of acceptance, how to listen and take care of themselves. other "problems" in their life seems trivial now.

it takes time but we will all get there.

[mirage]

@ChessieCat beautiful. @Rbvdk I am a strong Christian and a believer. God is good. He doesn't give us harm or put us in danger. The world is full of evil and we have to make decisions to not get sucked into it. Unfortunately, it happens. 

 

I have faith that we go through difficult things/times, so we can get closer to God and that we have things to learn. We can't see this now, but when we get through this journey, we will have gained so much.

 

I read my devotions every morning and I ask God for strength. I thank him for this opportunity to get closer to him and I ask him to show me signs along the way. I look for those signs and there are times, they just fall in my lap. Even simple things like finding a feather or seeing a butterfly are signs that God and Angels are around you. You just have to be a believer and be open to see. 

 

We have to believe in ourselves and that he is watching over us. God bless you. 

[FarmGirlWorks]

On 7/5/2018 at 12:25 PM, Rbvdk said:

a higher power that guided us through hard times to make the right decisions so the wrong decision doesn't end up completely ruining our lives.

That concept is hard to wrap one's head around. There is a lot of suffering in this world, now and in the past -- Syria, Rwanda, Holocaust, black plague and so on and so on infinitum. I don't think a higher power is there so we can dodge suffering. Life is full of suffering, ask anyone. But we can get in the way of whatever this higher power/creator/universe puts in our path. It is overwhelming and I think bad for our mental state to try to think our way out of a period of suffering and think that "just if I think hard enough, I'll figure it out and there will be no more suffering" (and I say this as someone who does this every day probably every hour...). Better to put the overthinking and figuring out onto a higher power and "float" through any suffering, any joy.

 

This is kinda rambling, sorry. It's an important question and I struggle with it too. Several traumatic events since mid-April to last weekend finally allowed me to feel so overwhelmed that I had to put it all on a higher power. And, so far, it has allowed a little more peace to come through the cracks.

 

10 hours ago, xyz said:

it takes perspective to understand how much this can change us. people who have recovered said that these were the most trial but teaching moments of their life. it has changed them in a better way- they understand the true meaning of acceptance, how to listen and take care of themselves. other "problems" in their life seems trivial now.

That is so good to hear, @xyz. I love "other 'problems' seem trivial now."

 

"I read my devotions every morning and I ask God for strength. I thank him for this opportunity to get closer to him and I ask him to show me signs along the way. I look for those signs and there are times, they just fall in my lap. Even simple things like finding a feather or seeing a butterfly are signs that God and Angels are around you. You just have to be a believer and be open to see."

Exactly, @mirage. I, too, feel that this is an opportunity to get closer to whatever one's concept of a higher power is. It is going deeper and we are being called to do that.

[mirage]

@FarmGirlWorks You are right about suffering being everywhere. There is evil all around. We have to have some type of faith, what ever it is that each of us chooses, to help get us through. We are in charge of making our own decisions but those choices can be guided. l love what you said about going deeper and that we are being called to do that. Each of our paths have been changed now and we are on a new road. This gives us opportunity to do better, make better choices and find new beginnings. It can be an amazing and beautiful thing. We just have to believe. Thank you! 

[mirage]

@xyz I love what you said. This will take time and we will all have so much we will have gained. 

[xyz]

when i am symptomatic, i have noticed that i feel more fragile and have a lot more empathy for other's suffering. my sense of compassion deepen.

when i am in a window, i have so much gratitude that it brings me a sense of peace and contentment, and i feel closer to my higher power.

there is no heaven without hell or we can say, it is all part if the human experiences.

 

a friend told me that it is a lot harder to be kind to ourselves when things go wrong.

i am  a kind of person to let things eat me, worried about what people think of me...

i grew up in a stressful environment, and being in a constant survival mode was not really good for my nervous system.

 

it takes that kind of cataclysmic suffering for me to be willing to change.

 

[Rbvdk]

Thank you everyone for replying I love all your comments, it's nice knowing you also learn from bad experiences and become more empathetic. faith definitely does give some comfort too.

[xyz]

Rbvdk,

"finding meaning to all this" has always been a debate among sufferers.

i am on a support Tinnitus board and i have noticed that people who live better with their Tinnitus are the one who don;t fight it, accept it and try to have the most normal of a life as possible.

the withdrawal from Spych meds is a different animal but nevertheless, the coping skills are the same.

there can a be a lot of anger, and it makes it even harder to heal. but beneath the anger there is deep grief, and touching it can release some tension and make things  a bit easier.

 

i read the book by Frankl "man search for meaning", a psychotherapist who survived a concentration camp and went on to develop a theory .

 

“What man actually needs is not a tensionless state but rather the striving and struggling for some goal worthy of him. What he needs is not the discharge of tension at any cost, but the call of a potential meaning waiting to be fulfilled by him.” Victor Emil Frankl (1905 – 1997), Austrian neurologist, psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor, devoted his life to studying, understanding and promoting “meaning.” His famous book,Man’s Search for Meaning, tells the story of how he survived the Holocaust by finding personal meaning in the experience, which gave him the will to live through it. He went on to later establish a new school of existential therapy called logotherapy, based in the premise that man’s underlying motivator in life is a “will to meaning,” even in the most difficult of circumstances. Frankl pointed to research indicating a strong relationship between “meaninglessness” and criminal behaviors, addictions and depression. Without meaning, people fill the void with hedonistic pleasures, power, materialism, hatred, boredom, or neurotic obsessions and compulsions. Some may also strive for Suprameaning, the ultimate meaning in life, a spiritual kind of meaning that depends solely on a greater power outside of personal or external control.

 

more about him

http://www.pursuit-of-happiness.org/history-of-happiness/viktor-frankl/

 

so, it is not so much about faith but about finding meaning.

[Rbvdk]

Xyz, I love that quote! That sounds like a good book I'll definitey look into it. I definitey agree that finding meaning is a big contributer in dealing with things and even healing. It's good to have something other than the suffering to focus on. Thanks for sharing about the book by the way!

[Evoldnahturt]

"Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. 
Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. 
Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? 
Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?"

- Epicurus

 

A much more profound evil than withdrawal syndrome is the Christians' view of hell.  You shouldn't have to experience withdrawal syndrome to understand that the Christian God is evil.  Imagining Hell should be sufficient.  It's much more painful, will never end, and isn't issued justly.  The likely truth is that there is no God and consciousness ceases after death.  This is a difficult truth to accept.  It's so difficult that coming up with alternative explanations is one of the first things a culture produces after finding food and shelter.  Once a society becomes large enough, that need is typically wielded as a weapon by governments, parents, and peers to control other people.  It's structured in a way to do that very efficiently.  Understanding things like this can help you to avoid many of the dangers within this world, but these understandings may not bring you much comfort.