jozeff: trying to come off of citalopram - a little help would be great

[manymoretodays]

29 minutes ago, jozeff said:

The risk is that possible serious issues are masked by WD symptoms for instance deficiency of vitamins and trace(minerals).

  How can I see or feel the difference between WD and 'real' symptoms?

 

Hi jozeff,

Great thought.  I'll just comment on the or that serious issues(and sometimes not so serious) are often missed, when diagnoses of MI(mental illness) are made as well.

That's one of the problems that I think can/could be solved by really complete medical evaluations before the prescription pad comes out.  Both in the psychiatrists office AND GP's office.

 

They are all "real" symptoms, I think. 

It's a complicated issue for sure. 

 

Best, L, P, H, and R,

mmt

 

Oh and congrats on the new baby coming................that's happy making news.

 

Edited September 30, 2018 by manymoretodays

[jozeff]

Hi guys, as I might have mentioned before. While trying to stabilize on 18 mg I accidentally took 28 mg citalopram last Friday morning. Last weekend I felt pretty good but yesterday I started feeling very derealized and off and today it's even worse. Could this be from that 1 too high a dose? I'm pretty sensitised to this stuff.

Since it takes a couple of days to reach the brain I'm pretty scared. Someone mentioned taking double dose of Seroquel and had side effects for one month!

 

Perhaps a moderator can share their wisdom with me? Thanks a lot!!

 

Have a nice day!

 

 

Jozeff

[Gridley]

Everybody is different, and I wouldn't assume the worst case.  It's very possible you will stabilize within a few days.   It's always better to assume the best-case scenario.  Worry is hard on the nervous system.

 

 

[ChessieCat]

2 hours ago, Gridley said:

It's always better to assume the best-case scenario.  Worry is hard on the nervous system.

 

I agree.

[jozeff]

Gridley, those might be the wisest words this week.....

 

Everybody and every medication/circumstances are different so its incredibly complex to predict how things will turn out. 

 

I just hoped that someone would say: oh you doubled your citalopram last Friday so you will have flu like symptoms Thursday afternoon 😉

 

Always looking for confirmation........

 

 

Thanks anyway!!

 

 

Have a very nice day.

 

Jozeff

[India]

On 8/11/2018 at 8:36 PM, jozeff said:

Hello everyone,

 

I'm still at 16.5 mg citalopram. Have been on this dose for five weeks now. I can't say I'm feeling a lot better to be honest. Started taper in April and went from 24 mg to 16.5 mg @ 0.1 mg per day which seemed pretty decent to me. At 16.5 mg I started feeling very emotional, very down every morning and just awful so I stayed at that dose.

 

Did I taper to fast? I mean 7.5 mg in 75 days isn't extremely fast I hope. I leveled at 16.5 mg to stabilize and I had hoped that 5 weeks was decent to get steady. What do you think? I'm willing to start tapering again at a slower rate but I'm hesitant to do that before I feel stable. 

i had a panic attack this morning and have had heart palpitations all day. Could that be withdrawal??

 

thanks guys! I noticed that the person replying to my messages is me mostly... Is there a way so that more people will follow my topic? I want to benefit from all the knowledge here!!

 

thanks!!

 

jozeff

Hello jozeff, I can't offer too much advice as I am in the midst of a terrible withdrawal after two years of chopping and changing but not following the 10% method. I have learnt the hard way!! This time round i went from 10mg to 0mg in 6 weeks. Then one month into my withdrawal my symptoms really took off majorly until my mind completely cracked and I reinstated.. reinstatement after 2/3 weeks ( starting at 2mg, and now going up to 6mg of liquid citalopram) has so far not stopped some of the extreme symptoms . However, I have experienced some waves of respite. My personal opionion is stabilise, stabilise!!!! If I could go back I would have fought for the citalopram liquid before and done a reduction after a year. I know it's very individual too. I had a friend come off sertraline after 11 years and is completely fine. I think it egged me on to go to fast. 

[India]

Over a year, not after a year*

[India]

The panic attacks, heart palpitations. It's all withdrawal! I've had it all. Cortisol spikes in the morning, racing heart, nocturnal panic attacks. 

[India]

15 hours ago, Gridley said:

Everybody is different, and I wouldn't assume the worst case.  It's very possible you will stabilize within a few days.   It's always better to assume the best-case scenario.  Worry is hard on the nervous system.

 

 

Yes, I agree with this. Feeding the mind and soul with positive affirmations has helped me through difficult times.

[jozeff]

Hi India, thank you so much for your response.

 

 

So you reinstated a few weeks ago. Is your current dose 6 mg?

 

The symptoms are very strange sometimes, they keep surprising me. 

At the moment I'm having a lot of fatigue and muscle pain in neck and back. I'm having a cold and it seems the symptoms are much worse then a few months ago. Extremely tired and that makes me feel down and anxious.

Do you recognize these symptoms?

 

I still find it hard to believe that this may be caused by my taper I started in April. Ok, I'm at the same dose since August 14th but that is almost 9 weeks... Expected to feel pretty stable by now but we know how nasty this stuff is...

 

Did you experience some food problems, I mean some foods you couldn't eat suddenly because of WD?

 

Hang in there! Hope your small dose isn't too large for you and you will be stabilizing soon!!

 

Cheers

 

Jozeff

 

 

 

 

[Songbird]

12 hours ago, jozeff said:

I just hoped that someone would say: oh you doubled your citalopram last Friday so you will have flu like symptoms Thursday afternoon 😉

 

 

We can't be that accurate, but it might help to remember that dose changes affect plasma concentration gradually over several days, so one incorrect dose may not have as big an effect as you might expect.  That is, if you doubled your dose for just one day, it doesn't make the available dose in your bloodstream suddenly double.  That isn't to say the incorrect dose has no effect, but I think a lot of the anxiety people feel when this happens is probably from worrying about it.  It's more likely to be a small blip that settles down fairly quickly.

[jozeff]

Thanks songbird, I realize that. It's probably less worse then how we feel about a double dose. Plasma levels will smoothen things out I guess.

 

 

 

Have a nice day!!

 

 

Jozeff

[ChessieCat]

"I was wondering. Are there any food sensitivities you experienced while tapering citalopram ( or other AD)?"

 

This topic has been moved to an existing topic:  food-sensitivities

 

[jozeff]

Thanks chessiecat, great stuff!!

 

 

Cheers

 

Jozeff

[India]

On 7/22/2018 at 6:57 PM, Kostas said:

Hi Jozeff 

as a point of encouragement, I was on citalopram 20 mg on/off for 13 years. 

I had 3 failed attempts to withdraw, but always reinstated to the full dose in order to stop the physical symptoms. 

In my fourth attempt, I was able to stop it, in a very very slow process, lasting almost 7 years. 

During this time I had almost none withdrawal symptoms, and now I am off the citalopram for 6 years and 90% functional. 

Take care. 

 

P. S

During my last weaning of the drug, I was not aware of this site, and was following my instinct with big cuts of 50% but long holdings of 6-9 months, and proceeding to the next cut only if feeling absolutely stable! 

I'm always told by different doctor's and psychiatrists that citalopram has the least withdrawal symptoms and in their view is innocuous (and that 10mg is the minimum therapeutic dose therefore easy to jump off) . These experiences and  my own, having spent two years trying to get off the god damn stuff, suggests otherwise. If I hadn't found this website then I would have felt alone . I was categorically told by 3 different gps that none of their patients had had problems getting off citalopram.

[India]

On 10/4/2018 at 5:07 PM, jozeff said:

Hi India, thank you so much for your response.

 

 

So you reinstated a few weeks ago. Is your current dose 6 mg?

 

The symptoms are very strange sometimes, they keep surprising me. 

At the moment I'm having a lot of fatigue and muscle pain in neck and back. I'm having a cold and it seems the symptoms are much worse then a few months ago. Extremely tired and that makes me feel down and anxious.

Do you recognize these symptoms?

 

I still find it hard to believe that this may be caused by my taper I started in April. Ok, I'm at the same dose since August 14th but that is almost 9 weeks... Expected to feel pretty stable by now but we know how nasty this stuff is...

 

Did you experience some food problems, I mean some foods you couldn't eat suddenly because of WD?

 

Hang in there! Hope your small dose isn't too large for you and you will be stabilizing soon!!

 

Cheers

 

Jozeff

 

 

 

 

@jozeff only just saw this post. All my symptoms seem to be clustered around anxiety: racing heart, nocturnal panic and jolts, nocturnal amnesia , then they go I to psychological realm : dissociation and depersonalisation. I am having memory issues and executive functioning issues . Coordination is impaired . Interestingly in April, I had temporary leg paralysis and tingling and numbness for months.  I suffer from chronic tightness due to trauma issues so it is hard to extricate neurological symptoms and know what to attribute them too as it's all so interconnected . I haven't had lots of extra pain . Interestingly, after my friend tapered for one month off her  sertraline she experienced terrifying anxiety and pelvic pain. She went back on and is convinced pain is unrelated as since going back on her pain is worse. She has been told that she may have an autoimmune condition. I think that the sertraline is playing a role but she believed that it wasn't withdrawal rather her anxiety condition returning. She's still had terrible anxiety on the ssris . She told me she was going to transfer to cymbalta. I have tried to delicately discuss it with her but she is sticking with the medical model for now. I haven't had too many food sensitivities only one day but my stomach is very strong ... I get extremely cold and this is absolutely due to my meds. I am on 6mg, yes,  but as we have discussed in other thread I will start either 10% or brass monkey taper at some point. it has taken me so long to get my head around this site due to how I am feeling. 

You are right this is strong , "nasty" stuff. My brother is on cymbalta and my sister just got off sertraline. So many  of our generation are being medicated. At what cost ? I am 35 , my brother 33 and my sister 26. 

There is some suggestion EFT can help with symptoms for some. 

[ButterflyHope]

Hi @India and @jozeff- I stopped by as I am also trying to get off citalopram (ive been on its since I was 18, im 33 now) 😀 I'm the same in that I'm just changing over to liquid, I'm hoping it goes smoothly but you never can tell, I'm trying not to think about it. I've got down to 1.16mg over 16 months from 10 mg. I've been on more in the past. I recognise most of the symptoms you guys are experiencing, particularly intense anxiety, arm tremors and nausea/vomiting.

 

I didn't know what I was doing and when a Dr said I could just stop at 2.5mg, I decided to halve it instead. This started a complete nightmare of events including akathisia. I had to reinstate at 2.5mg and reduce in much smaller amounts. I'm now going to reduce at 10% increments and stabilise at each. I still cant really believe the impact such small changes can have!

 

I've become extremely tired over the last reduction and I carry a hot water bottle with me everywhere now! I keep telling myself even when I feel horrendous that I do know I was able to feel quite alight at low doses before this so I know its just a matter of time. I think with most things in life theres things you can do to help change how you feel, but with this it feels like its a matter of enough time passing and symptoms easing. That's what I take from the success stories anyway. It's like just hold on tight until you're through the worst of it!

 

It would be good to know how you guys are getting on, I have a support network of family but its still a lonely business when others cant really understand it if they haven't been through it

 

Butterfly x

[India]

On 9/14/2018 at 2:11 PM, jozeff said:

 

I do drink 1 l of Diet Coke per day! Would that be really bad for me? It just tastes so good but I'm afraid it may cause some extra issues like nervousness or my pH getting much too low?

@jozeff I decided to give up my beloved coffee... I grew up with my Italian grandmother and her cappuccino machine. I love coffee culture but I decided i would let go of it for the sake of my nervous system. It's a very individual choice some say not to change too many things as coffee causes withdrawal. I find coffee withdrawal is pretty short lived maybe 3-5 days max. As for the neurological issues,  there is a whole branch of neurology called functional neurology . Maybe you know about i. Stress can do all sorts to the body. I remind myself of this and try at every turn to do calming things. Mindfulness has helped despite my initial resistance to it. 

[India]

25 minutes ago, ButterflyHope said:

Hi @India and @jozeff- I stopped by as I am also trying to get off citalopram (ive been on its since I was 18, im 33 now) 😀 I'm the same in that I'm just changing over to liquid, I'm hoping it goes smoothly but you never can tell, I'm trying not to think about it. I've got down to 1.16mg over 16 months from 10 mg. I've been on more in the past. I recognise most of the symptoms you guys are experiencing, particularly intense anxiety, arm tremors and nausea/vomiting.

 

I didn't know what I was doing and when a Dr said I could just stop at 2.5mg, I decided to halve it instead. This started a complete nightmare of events including akathisia. I had to reinstate at 2.5mg and reduce in much smaller amounts. I'm now going to reduce at 10% increments and stabilise at each. I still cant really believe the impact such small changes can have!

 

I've become extremely tired over the last reduction and I carry a hot water bottle with me everywhere now! I keep telling myself even when I feel horrendous that I do know I was able to feel quite alight at low doses before this so I know its just a matter of time. I think with most things in life theres things you can do to help change how you feel, but with this it feels like its a matter of enough time passing and symptoms easing. That's what I take from the success stories anyway. It's like just hold on tight until you're through the worst of it!

 

It would be good to know how you guys are getting on, I have a support network of family but its still a lonely business when others cant really understand it if they haven't been through it

 

Butterfly x

You aren't alone but it really can feel like that . I find most people in my circle   failing to comprehend the extremity of what this WD has brought up, the extremity of it.  I will write more later. I'm feeling quite wiped out by my symptoms. 

[Miracle123]

Hi Jozeff, Thanks for coming into my thread.During your tapering process ,so fast you already in the windows and waves pattern which is good sign of healing improvement. In my  case, im a bit suffering during my early withdrawals with all withdarwals flare up for almost 6 months.(im fast taper). Im only noticed slightly improvement and better at months 7 over with windows and waves pattern but so slowly.Im very bad in the early morning wake up as early 5am with cortisol spike and my eyes feel really uncomfortable when sunlight due to light sensitivity, a bit better at afternoon the hit again on late afternoon.....so bad and loss hope. The only night im feel much much better and hope the night will be forever.😂

Keep going with your 0.1mg tapering and always listen to your body and mind reaction. Im hope you getting smooth in your tapering with only mild to zero withdrawals.

Stress and negative though is factor of depreassion and emotional. Stay relax, meditation,exercise ,eat healthy and distraction to keep away withdrawals. Take care.

 

Best wishes, 

Miracle

 

[jozeff]

Hi miracle!!

 

Thank you for your response. Well, I'm actually not tapering right now. I started a taper in April 2018 and decreased 0.1 mg every day. After 85 days I crashed so I stayed on 16.5 mg for a couple of weeks. I felt so bad that I updosed to 18 mg to feel better. That didn't really help because my body had to get used to that dose also. I'm on 18 mg citalopram now since August 14th 2018. Feel pretty stable....not good but stable. Some good days, some bad ones but not extremely anxious or depressed like in my taper.

 

 

I'm planning to taper 10% per month with a 3 week hold in between and see how that goes. That is much slower than my previous taper.

The holding weeks are important because otherwise your brain will be adjusting all the te without a single day with the same dose.

 

I really feel you.....the evenings are wonderful. Amazing how different we can feel during the day. In the morning around 11 I feel absolutely miserable some days. In the evening everything's fine.

 

Hope you're doing well!

 

 

Cheers

Jozeff

 

[Miracle123]

18 hours ago, jozeff said:

I'm planning to taper 10% per month with a 3 week hold in between and see how that goes. That is much slower than my previous taper.

The holding weeks are important because otherwise your brain will be adjusting all the te without a single day with the same dose.

Hi Jozeff, Look like your tapering planning is prepare well. Yes..important is always listen to your body and mind.Holiding for some time to give your nervous system to readjusted and take a break can calm down your withdrawals. Hope everything goes well in your next tapering. Hang in there and take care.

 

[Songbird]

19 hours ago, jozeff said:

I'm planning to taper 10% per month with a 3 week hold in between and see how that goes.

 

I'm confused by this. 10% per month makes sense - where does the 3 week hold fit in, won't you be holding for a month?

[jozeff]

Hi,

 

If I'm correct the 'original' tapering was 10 % per month. To be precise 2.5% per week which is approximately 10% per month.

 

Brass monkey adviced to build in stabilizing weeks, 2 if I'm correct. 

I just wanted to try 2.5% per week and then after 4 weeks stay on that dose for 3 weeks to stabilize. If that goes well I'll shorten the stabilizing weeks a bit or increase the 2.5%.....

 

It's just important to go slowly. It's motivating to taper because you feel like you're coming off the medication. 

 

Cheers

 

Jozeff

[Songbird]

8 hours ago, jozeff said:

I just wanted to try 2.5% per week and then after 4 weeks stay on that dose for 3 weeks to stabilize.

 

Okay, Brassmonkey Slide method.

[jozeff]

Hi all,

 

Last week was a bit of a struggle. Sunday afternoon was bad, I had a giant wave that lasted all afternoon. Great weather, holiday week, my son and wife are amazing but .....still a wave and feeling awful. Like this was going to last forever. Today I visited a cave with my son and Mom and we drove for 3 hours, beautiful weather, cave was amazing but...still a big wave. Kept thinking, what if jumped of this mountain? What if I got lost in the cave on purpose and starved to death? No panicking today, just this DR and depressed feelings....no fun, worried like hell.

Like this is the rest of my life.

 

This is always so. I know deep inside that this feeling probably won't last forever but I just don't believe it when I feel this bad.

Does someone recognize this?

 

Question: did any of you have WD like symptoms while being on AD? 

 

I am currently at 18 mg citalopram for two months now and hoping to stabilize before tapering but I begin to fear this might never happen while on citalopram.

 

I mean, maybe this is just how I am when on this medication. Maybe the medication just stopped working at some point and I am fooling myself in thinking I will stabilize on any dose and then taper without too many problems..

 

I started tapering in April and stopped in June. Could these awful symptoms still be caused by this tapering adventure from 25 to 18 mg? I'm having increasing problems believing this and getting a bit desperate about my healing.

 

Any positive input is more than welcome!

 

Thanks guys

 

Jozeff

 

[India]

3 hours ago, jozeff said:

This is always so. I know deep inside that this feeling probably won't last forever but I just don't believe it when I feel this bad.

Does someone recognize this?

 

I knew a girl doing her PhD and worked in early intervention psychosis. She seemed pretty knowledgeable about psychopharmacology and I remember her saying that the damage done from most psychiatric drugs are functional rather than structural, therefore, the premise is these can heal.

 

I think this is an excellent article by James Heaney

https://npanth.wordpress.com/2012/03/14/phases-of-ssri-withdrawal/

Here is an excerpt but I recommend reading the whole thing. It is very comforting:

"One of the frustrating things about weaning off an SSRI is that the patient is only aware of progress after a phase has passed. They may feel extreme anxiety, but realize that the rage they experienced a few months before no longer bothers them. While they are experiencing a phase, there is no context to compare their emotions to. Since the emotions are so powerful and uncontrollable, emotional self awareness is short circuited, leading to mental relativism. The patient doesn’t realize the whole range of emotions, just the small extreme range that they are experiencing at the moment. The alternative to blind rage isn’t calmness, as it would be in a normal person. Instead, irrational anger is the lower end of the emotional range.

During withdrawal, these realities change and evolve as some emotions become dominant. Patients may experience uncontrollable rage for a few weeks, then enter a stage where depression dominates. These emotional tides are outward signs of the brain readjusting to the need to self regulate neurotransmitter levels. It is almost as if the mind is going through the entire inventory of emotion trying to catalog what’s necessary to regulate each one. Some people will experience several uncontrollable emotions at the same time, but the uncontrollable aspect of them will fade away one at a time."

 

 

I think this mental relavitism is the crux. At least for me, I am on a treadmill of thoughts and fears. As if I have regressed. But we do regress under stress, or at least experience a hijack of the brain processes. I have to go over the same consolations day in and day out. Fear is very repetitive like that. I despise the contraction of my life at times but as I am basically holding onto the edge of freaking cliff, more sophisticated ways of operating will have to be dispensed with. I long for the day when I operate on another level again. I think Bessel Van Der Kolk would describe us all as traumatised. We've all been shaken to our core. I think these are why the doubts are festering, but also because it is a lot trial and error. Also, you are in the real-time of your anxiety so it feels as if this is the only reality but it is not.

 

I am sorry you are suffering. You have had windows, you must try to hold onto these. This is bad phase but it will pass. Have you had a chance to listen to Dr. Claire Weekes, healing is non-linear. It is possible to have side effects whilst still on the meds. After my first fast withdrawal in December 2017, after 6 weeks of horrific symptoms I went back on to 10mg, that dose reduction I stayed on, but I felt emotionally fragile, experienced breathing difficulties, anxiety and panic for 6 months. I didn't keep a diary but I experienced a lot. 

I am absolutely sure that you will heal. We are all going to heal. Yes, this is so hard on the psyche but many have tread the path before us.

I am sure the moderators can give you some good advice but just to say that I realise now that a 2mg reintroduction of citalopram after a 2.5 month withdrawal created an adverse reaction in me. Something I couldn't quite believe at the time. Do you feel like you just want to start tapering?

I know that I haven't stabilised at all yet despite reintroducing on the 13th September. I still feel the same though I do have windows. I have not returned to where I was when I was on 10mg.

 

Today I went swimming for the first time. I found it good though I was very weak and it got my mind off withdrawal for a bit. Is there anything you can do that might give you a bit of freedom from your anxieties? Even for a brief moment. Granted, I still had  derealization (the worst symptom) but it get me out of thinking about withdrawal and reading up on it, and listening to podcasts on it. I feel like a mermaid when I swim.

 

I hope some more members will comment with support and advice.

Don't forget how strong you are though you may not feel it.

3 hours ago, jozeff said:

Last week was a bit of a struggle. Sunday afternoon was bad, I had a giant wave that lasted all afternoon. Great weather, holiday week, my son and wife are amazing but .....still a wave and feeling awful. Like this was going to last forever. Today I visited a cave with my son and Mom and we drove for 3 hours, beautiful weather, cave was amazing but...still a big wave. Kept thinking, what if jumped of this mountain? What if I got lost in the cave on purpose and starved to death? No panicking today, just this DR and depressed feelings....no fun, worried like hell.

Like this is the rest of my life.

 

Just to say, I recognize this despair. When you know your externals should be making you happy but your internal state is not interacting with the things that you know would normally make you happy. I have found I try to challenge the secondary suffering around this. Just remember that there are windows and windows are coming. Be kind to yourself. You will feel  joy again. 

[India]

 

 

[jozeff]

Hi India,

 

Thank you for you reaction. Appreciate it a lot!

 

I have the book written by Claire Weeks. Discovered it a few weeks ago. 

 

Today is a bit better but I still have the nervous feeling from yesterday. Afraid that I will feel like crying again.

 

The demons in my head I call them. Memories of unpleasant things in my life like my parents divorce, having no friends when I was a kid, feeling unsafe in social situations....these thoughts come back when I feel down. They keep coming in my brain like pictures of evil. 

 

Although these situations are not happening at the moment nor do they have anything to do with my current situation , they keep haunting me and make me feel like I have to cry. Of course I cannot cry because of the citalopram so the feeling stays in my head for hours.

 

This is a big problem for me. Very hard to let these nasty feelings go. I cannot cry or become very angry ..these emotions just float and stay where they are. I feel like I'm depressed but the citalopram just doesn't let me express these feelings. They stay in my head.

 

It's ok to feel like crying or to be anxious but not being capable of dealing with these feelings is really nasty. The problem is the self fulfilling prophecy. I think, hey why am I not depressed, I should be! Then these thoughts start to pop in my head like : I have always felt like this and I probably will always feel like this.

 

Before I know it my brain feels very stressed and heavy and I'm spiraling down. Going to make a sandwich or brush my teeth feels like climbing a mountain and I jump onto the couch with my phone and time passes and my worries start rocketing into the sky. In the evening almost always these feelings calm down and I'm able to relax a bit.

 

Now I'm having a  Holiday week my trouble seems a lot bigger. At work these feelings just have no time to evolve. At home, my wife is at work, I have plenty of time to worry like hell....

 

Today I'm going swimming with my wife and son so the afternoon will be pretty ok! A lot of distraction.

 

 

Have a nice day!!!

 

Thanks for your great help India.

 

Cheers

 

Jozeff

[India]

It is  very hard not to spiral when you are spiralling. A way of coping might be to see how much you are juggling and managing and how far you have come and remind yourself of your strength and determination. Change is the only constant. I mean does anything in life stay permenantly fixed? There is always movement. There is a U.K. hypnotist called Marissa Peer, she said that they starting introducing the phrase, "I have excellent coping skills" to a rehab and saw patients improve just by reiiterating this. I suppose you are appealing to your mind to contextualise the situation in a way that gives you a sense of empowerment. How are you doing today? From everything I have read on this site suggests you are in another wave, although tsunami like but you have had waves before....You must hold onto that. I try to remember, in my dark hours, that I am not alone. I use the Claire Weekes expression, "It is only a thought in a tired mind". It's good that you have some familiars in your life, though hard to manage this keeps you connected to the world, even if you feel disconnected. From what I've read the brain, neurogenesis thrives on activity/ interaction with environment.

 

As for past traumas. I relate. I don't know what is going on in the brain in WD but I've had a supply line of vivid memories assault me in a way I have never experienced. It's as if it's all jumbled. You aren't alone. I suppose there is an element of the suppressed emotional life coming back but highly conflated with WD symptoms. It is this mix that proves so intolerable.

Have you tried passiflora? Apparently you can take it with citalopram though do double check. It helped with my anxiety and cortisol spikes.

I hope you get some answers on the citalopram stabilisation issues.

 

Do you have a therapist? 

[jozeff]

Thanks for your support India!

 

I'm glad that you recognize some of my symptoms, makes me feel less lonely...

 

Yes I do have a therapist but that is not going in the right direction. No real plans and just some small talk. He never heard about citalopram in the first place. Doesn't know anything about WD or meds. I had some advice on my panic attacks. He tells me just to relax and not feel that way.... Not really helpful.

 

Yes I have a wavy period. I'm at my best when I'm working and having normal weekends. This holiday week is very disrupting for me.

I need structure. I have was diagnosed ADD and I'll be having a coach over in my house in a few weeks to help me with that.

 

One thing I noticed.... when I have holidays I eat a lot of potato chips, candy, diet coke etc. I cannot prove this but my wife and I have this feeling that this is very destructive for my mood. I feel agitated, stressed and pretty sad most of the days. 

 

This didn't bother me years ago but I'm 42 years old now and taking citalopram.

 

Of course I know diet is important but does any of you notice a change in mood when eating junk food?

 

Thanks again!

 

Jozeff

 

 

[Gridley]

Withdrawal can create food sensitivities that we didn't have before.  The caffeine in the Coke and the sugar in the candy can certainly cause agitation and other symptoms.  I can't eat anything sweet because it causes anxiety.  

[Miracle123]

On 10/5/2018 at 12:07 AM, jozeff said:

The symptoms are very strange sometimes, they keep surprising me. 

At the moment I'm having a lot of fatigue and muscle pain in neck and back. I'm having a cold and it seems the symptoms are much worse then a few months ago. Extremely tired and that makes me feel down and anxious.

Do you recognize these symptoms?

Hi Jozeff, Just wanna come in to say hello. i recognised those all symptoms i have it too....sometimes you feel very bad and sometimes it will ease a bit. This is all from our brain and nervous trying to readjust even though small doses changed. This need quite some time to keep stable depends on individuals how fast to adapt it. 

About food sensitivity ......until now im also faced same problem....cannot take medicine, beware of supplements and some foods also make me anxious and flare up my withdrawals. Really unbelievable but truth is our body could tolerate any of this. Trial and error learn from mistake im have done and drop down note which i cannot take right now. This is temporary and when we healing im believe i no longer sensitive anymore.

Take care and hang in there. You will get better and well soon. 

[India]

On 10/18/2018 at 7:04 PM, jozeff said:

Thanks for your support India!

 

I'm glad that you recognize some of my symptoms, makes me feel less lonely...

 

Yes I do have a therapist but that is not going in the right direction. No real plans and just some small talk. He never heard about citalopram in the first place. Doesn't know anything about WD or meds. I had some advice on my panic attacks. He tells me just to relax and not feel that way.... Not really helpful.

 

Yes I have a wavy period. I'm at my best when I'm working and having normal weekends. This holiday week is very disrupting for me.

I need structure. I have was diagnosed ADD and I'll be having a coach over in my house in a few weeks to help me with that.

 

One thing I noticed.... when I have holidays I eat a lot of potato chips, candy, diet coke etc. I cannot prove this but my wife and I have this feeling that this is very destructive for my mood. I feel agitated, stressed and pretty sad most of the days. 

 

This didn't bother me years ago but I'm 42 years old now and taking citalopram.

 

Of course I know diet is important but does any of you notice a change in mood when eating junk food?

 

Thanks again!

 

Jozeff

 

 

For some reason these replies  aren't coming up on my notifications. Just to acknowledge your response and will reply very soon. I've gotten a bit behind. I had a terrible wave and then a tiny window today. 

[jozeff]

Thanks India, appreciate it!

 

The last weekt I've been taking a cold shower because I read some stuff about that being very good for depression.

 

First time I almost died 😂😂.

 

Second time was better and quite refreshing. I noticed however that after taking these cold showers I get this sad feeling in the front of my head. Like I Want To Cry.

 

This feeling stays with me for an hour or a couple of hours. I don't know if it's the cold shower but I just woke up quite relaxed. Took a warm shower and then ice cold afterwards. This Was Evil because  it's Early in the morning but after 2 minutes it felt very very refreshing. Now, half an hour later I have this crying like Sensation. I cannot cry because of my citalopram but the feeling is there. I'm not sad about Anything so that is a Strange Feeling.

 

 

Could have something to do with overactive nervous system.....

 

Dus Any of you recognize this. I would love to hear!!!

 

 

Thanks in advance.

 

Happy healing you all!

 

Jozeff

[jozeff]

Hi guys,

 

Question about cold showers:

 

 

I've been taking ice cold showers now for 6 days in a row and although it's very refreshing on the moment I have this dreadful feeling now for days. Very sad, depressed, suicidal ideation and just feeling anxious and blah.

 

Could this have something to do with cold showering? I mean all I read is that cold shower is so good for depression treatment. 

Ok, it kicks your nervous system for a while but could it be so activating that it changes my mood during the entire day??

 

 

Any advice would be greatly appreciated!

 

 

Thanks, have a nice day.