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☼-freespirit-mirtazapine-withdrawal

 

 

I’ve just passed the 4-year mark since I took my last dose of AD. I was on Remeron (Mirtazapine) for 10 years, including the time I was tapering. I’m a 63-year-old woman. The tapering was done before I found this site, so was faster than recommended on here. I was at 45 mg when I began the process; a dose I’d been on for about a year and a half. I was put on the drug at 7.5 mg initially and had increases as it pooped out—something I didn’t understand at the time.To repeat what’s in my signature about how I tapered: Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months. Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014.

 

Throughout tapering I had many of the typical symptoms: anxiety, depression, mood swings, obsessive thoughts, extreme anger, crying spells, muscle and joint pain, headaches (sometimes migraines), dizziness, nausea, vomiting, poor digestion, abdominal cramping, diarrhea, tinnitus, blurry vision, anhedonia, existential loneliness, disorientation, chills and fever, extreme blood sugar swings (I am diabetic), low energy, hives, sneezing. Most of these continued off and on after I'd jumped off as well.

 

Like many people, I felt great when I first quit the med. But within a week, I was hit hard by histamine intolerance symptoms. In a few months, when I learned what was going on, I went on a low histamine diet and gradually added a couple of supplements that helped with it—Vitamin C, Quercetin, and a simple probiotic. The diet, supplements, and continuation of the practices I’d been doing all along helped. As did some IV vitamins and the other treatments I was doing.

 

Nearly all those initial symptoms have been resolved. I still have some remnants of histamine intolerance, but am not nearly as careful with my diet as I once was. I still stay away from many high histamine foods like fish, spinach, strawberries, eggplant, tomatoes, dairy (except yogurt), fermented foods, pineapple, and food additives. I get hives very rarely, usually when I’ve been less careful with diet and am under stress. I don’t have any of the sneezing or nasal symptoms I once did.

 

I never kept track of my symptoms or when things got worse or better. For me, I felt that would only keep me locked into the whole process. I did my best to face whatever was happening in the moment and moved forward as I was able to.

 

My situation was complicated by a serious MVA I had in 2008 which included a brain injury. I had many of the same symptoms as WD from that accident, some of which had not resolved by the time I started tapering. I had pretty extreme light sensitivity until the past year. I can now easily be outside and even drive without sunglasses. The only exception is on cloudy bright days, where my eyes hurt if I don’t wear shades. I attribute this more to the MVA to WD, since it’s been there ever since the accident.

 

I was also still dealing with the death of my wife when I stated tapering. So, many of the emotional issues were also very much a part of the grieving process. It would be impossible for me to separate those out in terms of grief or WD.

 

Most aspects of my health have improved significantly. I lost a lot of weight and was able to get off 7 of the medications I was on. I had been taking Tylenol 3 for pain, Nasonex for allergies, 2 medications for asthma, a PPI, occasional Ativan for anxiety or insomnia, and Metformin for diabetes. The only med I currently take is Synthroid for hypothyroidism.

 

The things that helped me the most are listed in my signature: meditation, qi gong, guided imagery and hypnosis, chiropractic, massage, treatment with the naturopath (IV vitamins, homeopathy, and some bodywork), acupuncture, listening to music, being in nature and exercise—walking, swimming, and cycling. My cats provided a lot of nurturing during the process and have been able to make me laugh, even on the darkest days. I’m not sure I’d have made it through this past 6 ½ years without them. That’s how long it’s been since my wife died.

 

I’ve had several injuries through this time which may or may not be Wd related. They are all areas that were injured in the MVA. Still, I suspect that a more sensitive nervous system has added to the level of pain. I’m currently dealing with a hip injury. It’s likely this is torn cartilage and I won’t know for sure until I go in for an MRA sometime in the near future.

 

I’m able to have the occasional glass of wine, beer, or cider without any problem. I’ve used CBD oil successfully and have also used cannabis for pain in the past 7 months with the hip injury. I stick primarily to high CBD, low THC strains and have found very few problems with it. It’s the only thing I’ve used for pain during this time. It’s also helped improve sleep and mood at times.

 

My emotional life is I think for me, normal. I’ve always been sensitive and more likely to have stronger emotions than most people. I feel love, happiness, contentment, loneliness, longing, anger, sadness and everything else in the range of feelings. I very rarely suffer from the numbness I felt on the drug or what I felt at times during WD.

 

I’ve made new friends, went back to work (though I am currently not working, because the job I was doing ended), and have done a whole lot to improve my physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual health. Meditation is at the core of my life. I do 45-90 minutes a day of mindfulness and/or heart meditations. Once a week, I take a half or full day of silence—no computer, phone, or TV. I spend the time doing sitting and walking meditation or qi gong. I find this goes a very long way to maintaining emotional stability during the rest of the week. I’ve done 3 extended week-long meditation retreats at home during the past couple of years too.

 

I sleep 7-8 hours most nights, usually uninterrupted. This is actually a huge improvement for me. Prior to going on Remeron, I’d spent decades of dealing with intermittent or sometimes constant, insomnia. I feel rested the majority of time and still occasionally nap during the day, in addition to nighttime sleep.

 

I have always had a very sensitive nervous system, so have needed to be careful about over-stimulation for the majority of my life. But I no longer feel overwhelmed as I once did in WD. I can sense much earlier when I need to take a break in some way. That often prevents the kind of meltdowns I used to have-even before I took an AD. I’ve become a lot more skilled at caring for myself and actually place that at a priority, over everything else. Had I done that a lot earlier in my life, I’d have probably never ended up on medication. But at least I’ve learned it for now.

 

I still go through periods of pretty intense loneliness, but it’s not uncommon for people whose spouses have died. It’s also something I’ve been dealing with through a lot of my life. I seem to need meaning in my life more than most people. While my friends can be content with belonging to a garden or book club, that isn’t enough for me. Being able to contribute to the world in some way and have people I really deeply connect with are essential to my well-being. Sometimes those things are not so easy to find, which I believe is a major cause for the loneliness. I hope as things continue to grow and change in my external world, the intensity of feelings might lessen some.

 

I think it many ways, I’m so much stronger than I was when I began this process. I appreciate things more deeply than I used to, the small things in life. I honor my sensitivity, instead of struggling against it. I accept my quirks and idiosyncrasies more. I’m less afraid of what might be around the corner; I’ve already dealt with so much in terms of grief and WD.  I’ve become so much more determined about standing up for myself and not accepting poor behavior from others. To a huge degree, I’ve opted out of western medicine and most frequently seek out alternative medicine (which is something I’d been doing even before I started WD).

 

I hope that my story gives optimism to people who have tapered more quickly or to those earlier on in the process. It can be brutally difficult, but good things can come out of it too.

 

My intro thread can be found here: ☼-freespirit-mirtazapine-withdrawal

 

 

Edited by ChessieCat
link

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium. What has helped me most: qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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This is awesome to read Free!

Congrats on your journey so far -- very inspiring!

 

Best,

 

Andy

Sertraline 50mg and Clonazapam .375mg from 2000 -- symptoms of dizziness Spring 2012

increased to .5 Clonazapam and 100mg Sertraline -- no improvement

Benzo microtaper from November 2012 to November 2014 (followed benzo sites "taper benzo first")

Started Sertraline taper in December 2014 cut by 25mg to 75mg; 62.5mg 1/1/15 and 50mg on 2/1/15

Held at 50mg through April 5 to use liquid 
Reduced dosage in 10% or less drops from 50mg to 25mg -- at single tablet of 25mg on 10/5/15

Transitioned to all liquid for accuracy while tapering -- Horrible insomnia -- back to 25mg liquid and held until October 1, 2016

10/16 -- 11/18 tapered very slowly to 10.6mg.  No real improvement and never really stable so updosed to 12.5mg (1/2 a pill) for convenience and long hold.

After 8+ months of holding with no noticeable improvement decided to add .4ml of liquid Prozac (about 1.5mg) to see if that improves the situation

Supplements, Magnesium, D3, Omega 3, curcumin, Valerian, 81mg Aspirin, L-Theanine, Vit. C,

 

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15 hours ago, freespirit said:

I’ve just passed the 4-year mark since I took my last dose of AD. I was on Remeron (Mirtazapine) for 10 years, including the time I was tapering. I’m a 63-year-old woman. The tapering was done before I found this site, so was faster than recommended on here. I was at 45 mg when I began the process; a dose I’d been on for about a year and a half. I was put on the drug at 7.5 mg initially and had increases as it pooped out—something I didn’t understand at the time.To repeat what’s in my signature about how I tapered: Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months. Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014.

 

Throughout tapering I had many of the typical symptoms: anxiety, depression, mood swings, obsessive thoughts, extreme anger, crying spells, muscle and joint pain, headaches (sometimes migraines), dizziness, nausea, vomiting, poor digestion, abdominal cramping, diarrhea, tinnitus, blurry vision, anhedonia, existential loneliness, disorientation, chills and fever, extreme blood sugar swings (I am diabetic), low energy, hives, sneezing. Most of these continued off and on after I'd jumped off as well.

 

Like many people, I felt great when I first quit the med. But within a week, I was hit hard by histamine intolerance symptoms. In a few months, when I learned what was going on, I went on a low histamine diet and gradually added a couple of supplements that helped with it—Vitamin C, Quercetin, and a simple probiotic. The diet, supplements, and continuation of the practices I’d been doing all along helped. As did some IV vitamins and the other treatments I was doing.

 

Nearly all those initial symptoms have been resolved. I still have some remnants of histamine intolerance, but am not nearly as careful with my diet as I once was. I still stay away from many high histamine foods like fish, spinach, strawberries, eggplant, tomatoes, dairy (except yogurt), fermented foods, pineapple, and food additives. I get hives very rarely, usually when I’ve been less careful with diet and am under stress. I don’t have any of the sneezing or nasal symptoms I once did.

 

I never kept track of my symptoms or when things got worse or better. For me, I felt that would only keep me locked into the whole process. I did my best to face whatever was happening in the moment and moved forward as I was able to.

 

My situation was complicated by a serious MVA I had in 2008 which included a brain injury. I had many of the same symptoms as WD from that accident, some of which had not resolved by the time I started tapering. I had pretty extreme light sensitivity until the past year. I can now easily be outside and even drive without sunglasses. The only exception is on cloudy bright days, where my eyes hurt if I don’t wear shades. I attribute this more to the MVA to WD, since it’s been there ever since the accident.

 

I was also still dealing with the death of my wife when I stated tapering. So, many of the emotional issues were also very much a part of the grieving process. It would be impossible for me to separate those out in terms of grief or WD.

 

Most aspects of my health have improved significantly. I lost a lot of weight and was able to get off 7 of the medications I was on. I had been taking Tylenol 3 for pain, Nasonex for allergies, 2 medications for asthma, a PPI, occasional Ativan for anxiety or insomnia, and Metformin for diabetes. The only med I currently take is Synthroid for hypothyroidism.

 

The things that helped me the most are listed in my signature: meditation, qi gong, guided imagery and hypnosis, chiropractic, massage, treatment with the naturopath (IV vitamins, homeopathy, and some bodywork), acupuncture, listening to music, being in nature and exercise—walking, swimming, and cycling. My cats provided a lot of nurturing during the process and have been able to make me laugh, even on the darkest days. I’m not sure I’d have made it through this past 6 ½ years without them. That’s how long it’s been since my wife died.

 

I’ve had several injuries through this time which may or may not be Wd related. They are all areas that were injured in the MVA. Still, I suspect that a more sensitive nervous system has added to the level of pain. I’m currently dealing with a hip injury. It’s likely this is torn cartilage and I won’t know for sure until I go in for an MRA sometime in the near future.

 

I’m able to have the occasional glass of wine, beer, or cider without any problem. I’ve used CBD oil successfully and have also used cannabis for pain in the past 7 months with the hip injury. I stick primarily to high CBD, low THC strains and have found very few problems with it. It’s the only thing I’ve used for pain during this time. It’s also helped improve sleep and mood at times.

 

My emotional life is I think for me, normal. I’ve always been sensitive and more likely to have stronger emotions than most people. I feel love, happiness, contentment, loneliness, longing, anger, sadness and everything else in the range of feelings. I very rarely suffer from the numbness I felt on the drug or what I felt at times during WD.

 

I’ve made new friends, went back to work (though I am currently not working, because the job I was doing ended), and have done a whole lot to improve my physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual health. Meditation is at the core of my life. I do 45-90 minutes a day of mindfulness and/or heart meditations. Once a week, I take a half or full day of silence—no computer, phone, or TV. I spend the time doing sitting and walking meditation or qi gong. I find this goes a very long way to maintaining emotional stability during the rest of the week. I’ve done 3 extended week-long meditation retreats at home during the past couple of years too.

 

I sleep 7-8 hours most nights, usually uninterrupted. This is actually a huge improvement for me. Prior to going on Remeron, I’d spent decades of dealing with intermittent or sometimes constant, insomnia. I feel rested the majority of time and still occasionally nap during the day, in addition to nighttime sleep.

 

I have always had a very sensitive nervous system, so have needed to be careful about over-stimulation for the majority of my life. But I no longer feel overwhelmed as I once did in WD. I can sense much earlier when I need to take a break in some way. That often prevents the kind of meltdowns I used to have-even before I took an AD. I’ve become a lot more skilled at caring for myself and actually place that at a priority, over everything else. Had I done that a lot earlier in my life, I’d have probably never ended up on medication. But at least I’ve learned it for now.

 

I still go through periods of pretty intense loneliness, but it’s not uncommon for people whose spouses have died. It’s also something I’ve been dealing with through a lot of my life. I seem to need meaning in my life more than most people. While my friends can be content with belonging to a garden or book club, that isn’t enough for me. Being able to contribute to the world in some way and have people I really deeply connect with are essential to my well-being. Sometimes those things are not so easy to find, which I believe is a major cause for the loneliness. I hope as things continue to grow and change in my external world, the intensity of feelings might lessen some.

 

I think it many ways, I’m so much stronger than I was when I began this process. I appreciate things more deeply than I used to, the small things in life. I honor my sensitivity, instead of struggling against it. I accept my quirks and idiosyncrasies more. I’m less afraid of what might be around the corner; I’ve already dealt with so much in terms of grief and WD.  I’ve become so much more determined about standing up for myself and not accepting poor behavior from others. To a huge degree, I’ve opted out of western medicine and most frequently seek out alternative medicine (which is something I’d been doing even before I started WD).

 

I hope that my story gives optimism to people who have tapered more quickly or to those earlier on in the process. It can be brutally difficult, but good things can come out of it too.

 

My intro thread can be found here: https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/8459-%E2%98%BC-freespirit-mirtazapine-withdrawal/#entry144282

 

 

As I sit here tonight in a little window in touch with my good feelings listening to music  reading your beautiful post FS  .I thank you .too feel connected to a fellow human being by reading there heart and soul being poured out is just amazing and I relate to a lot you write .

IM honoured to take in your post .

Keep up your recovery and total respect to you freespirit.

 

Alcohol free since February 2015 

1MG diazepam

4.5MG PROZAC.

 

 

 

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manymoretodays
39 minutes ago, powerback said:

Keep up your recovery and total respect to you freespirit

 

I could not have worded it better so quoted PB.

Thank you freespirit........so much....... for your success story posting.  Very helpful......and I hope you'll continue to post from time to time.  I too, benefit greatly from your spirit here among us.  Wopila.  Check out the Lakota definition of this word and way of life....... if you have a moment or two.  It speaks to me.

As tradition has it........I expect Alto will be by to close your introduction soon.

Love, peace, healing, and growth,

manymoretodays

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. 

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. manymoretodays

 

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2 hours ago, apace41 said:

This is awesome to read Free!

Congrats on your journey so far -- very inspiring!

 

Best,

 

Andy

Thanks Andy. I appreciate your encouragement. I've read your thread and see things are still pretty challenging for you. I'm sorry--you've had a rough go of it. At least it sounds like your sleep has settled a bit again. I know the other symptoms can be so awful, but with insomnia thrown in...well, they become even harder to cope with. Were you ever able to resolve the hip pain? I remember that was a real problem for awhile too.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium. What has helped me most: qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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1 hour ago, powerback said:

As I sit here tonight in a little window in touch with my good feelings listening to music  reading your beautiful post FS  .I thank you .too feel connected to a fellow human being by reading there heart and soul being poured out is just amazing and I relate to a lot you write .

IM honoured to take in your post .

Keep up your recovery and total respect to you freespirit.

 

I'm really touched by your post PB. Sounds good that you're having a small window. I see from your thread though, you're dealing with a chest infection. I hope you're able to find what you need to move through that too. I'm glad you found something in my writing to connect with. I wasn't sure there would be anything in it that others could relate to. I so often feel I'm journeying alone, not just through WD, but through life in general. Few people seem to really see me. So thanks for sharing your experience. Good Health and healing blessings to you.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium. What has helped me most: qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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1 minute ago, freespirit said:

Were you ever able to resolve the hip pain?

 

Thanks for thinking of me, Free.  Would that I could claim miraculous healing of the hips, but, alas, they are not too good to be honest.  Very uncomfortable and painful and, more annoying, so limiting in what I can and can't do.  I'm fighting the whole idea of replacements because I want to see if there is improvement as I get lower on the meds.  

 

Anyway, thanks for asking -- I don't want to muck up your success thread!

 

Best,

 

Andy 

Sertraline 50mg and Clonazapam .375mg from 2000 -- symptoms of dizziness Spring 2012

increased to .5 Clonazapam and 100mg Sertraline -- no improvement

Benzo microtaper from November 2012 to November 2014 (followed benzo sites "taper benzo first")

Started Sertraline taper in December 2014 cut by 25mg to 75mg; 62.5mg 1/1/15 and 50mg on 2/1/15

Held at 50mg through April 5 to use liquid 
Reduced dosage in 10% or less drops from 50mg to 25mg -- at single tablet of 25mg on 10/5/15

Transitioned to all liquid for accuracy while tapering -- Horrible insomnia -- back to 25mg liquid and held until October 1, 2016

10/16 -- 11/18 tapered very slowly to 10.6mg.  No real improvement and never really stable so updosed to 12.5mg (1/2 a pill) for convenience and long hold.

After 8+ months of holding with no noticeable improvement decided to add .4ml of liquid Prozac (about 1.5mg) to see if that improves the situation

Supplements, Magnesium, D3, Omega 3, curcumin, Valerian, 81mg Aspirin, L-Theanine, Vit. C,

 

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33 minutes ago, manymoretodays said:

 

I could not have worded it better so quoted PB.

Thank you freespirit........so much....... for your success story posting.  Very helpful......and I hope you'll continue to post from time to time.  I too, benefit greatly from your spirit here among us.  Wopila.  Check out the Lakota definition of this word and way of life....... if you have a moment or two.  It speaks to me.

As tradition has it........I expect Alto will be by to close your introduction soon.

Love, peace, healing, and growth,

manymoretodays

Hi Manymoretodays. I did check out Wopila--what a beautiful meaning that goes with it. I appreciate what you've shared here, as well as the many other posts over my time on SA. I hope that in some way, my journey does help someone else. For me, that goes a long way toward the suffering having been for something. It's not enough for just me to benefit from it; it really matters if there's something I can pass along.

 

I know you've been through a lot of loss over the past while, on top of the losses you were already dealing with. That kind of grief adds another dimension to the losses that come with both the drugs and WD. Seems like you're finding your way through. Sending good wishes of healing your way too. Blessings on this next phase of your journey.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium. What has helped me most: qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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3 minutes ago, apace41 said:

 

Thanks for thinking of me, Free.  Would that I could claim miraculous healing of the hips, but, alas, they are not too good to be honest.  Very uncomfortable and painful and, more annoying, so limiting in what I can and can't do.  I'm fighting the whole idea of replacements because I want to see if there is improvement as I get lower on the meds.  

 

Anyway, thanks for asking -- I don't want to muck up your success thread!

 

Best,

 

Andy 

I'm sorry to hear that Andy. And don't worry about answering here--I asked, because I wanted to know. I've thought of you as I've been dealing with my own hip pain. However, the specialist says my hip is "pristine" and nowhere near replacement. At the moment, I'm doing much better on that count. The last couple of acupuncture treatments, plus a visit to the chiro has really helped with the pain. It might be temporary, but I'll take it. I hope you do find some relief as you progress in other ways.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium. What has helped me most: qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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Thank you for a beautiful and very inspiring post.

Gridley Introduction

 

Lexapro 20 mg since 2004.  Begin Brassmonkey Slide Taper Jan. 2017.   

End 2017 year 1 of taper at 9.25mg 

End 2018 year 2 of taper at 4.1mg

End 2019 year 3 of taper at 1.0mg  

Oct. 30, 2020  Jump to zero from 0.025mg.  Current dose: 0.000mg

3 year, 10 month taper is 100% complete.

 

Ativan 1 mg 1986-1991 CT, soon reinstated.  CT 2000. RI 1 mg 2011-2016.  Sept. 2016  0.625mg X 3

Nov.27, 2020 Begin 7-week Ativan-Valium crossover and change from 3 daily doses to one 18.75mgai dose (0.311mgpw). Jan. 11, 2021 begin hold at current bedtime 18.75mgai dose.

 

Imipramine 75 mg daily since 1986.  Jan. 2016 began every 3-weeks 10% taper, down to 16mgai (0.44mgpw).  Aug 2016, discovered SA, holding at 16mg.  Taper is 78% complete.  

  

Supplements: omega, vitamins E and D3, magnesium glycinate, probiotic, melatonin .3mg


I am not a medical professional and this is not medical advice, but simply information based on my own experience, as well as other members who have survived these drugs.

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Beautiful post—thank you!

Long history with many psych drugs beginning in 1987. Went through two too-fast Paxil withdrawals in the past. Ended up in ER both times. I successfully got off Wellbutrin, and (occasional only) Seroquel, Concerta, and Klonopin over six months. Current supplements: multivitamin, probiotic, D3, magnesium, CBD. Current drugs: Ranitidine 300 mg. for acid reflux, Paxil (tapering off).

 

Paxil Taper History, 2018/2019

Jan.1: 60 mg. May 1: 55 mg. May 13: 50 mg. June 3: 47.5 mg. June 14: 45 mg. June 21: 42.5 mg. July 5: 40 mg. Switched to figuring by weight. 40 mg. = .704 July 22: .686. July 29: .669. August 5: .652. August 12: .635. September 2: 30 mg. October 2: 25 mg. November 2: 22 mg. December 1: 20 mg. January 6: 18 mg. Now using a digital scale and an emery board to taper. January 16: I decided to go back on the drugs after a year of tapering. I’m more depressed than ever, and do not believe it’s withdrawal. Thank you, everyone, for your support, advice, and kindness. Centime.

 

 

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Thanks @Gridley and @Centime

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium. What has helped me most: qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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I forgot to mention and I also had many of the cognitive symptoms for a long while--memory problems, concentration, general cog fog. Things got quite a bit better when I started working again, as I had to focus, learn new computer programs, interact more with people and so on. For a long time, I'd read and not be able to remember a thing I read. Now I'm back to being able to have several different books on the go and not only remember, but take far more enjoyment from reading. Since I'm not working right now, my brain isn't as sharp as it was. But still think I'm doing okay.

 

The other thing I wanted to add was that I wish these stories were titled "recovery stories" rather than "success stories". Maybe it's just me, but it feels more realistic to assume that I'm in a recovery process, rather than having achieved some permanent state. I imagine that stress or other things could bring up some of the symptoms again. If I think of this as recovery, then it's easier to take the ups and downs in stride. Maybe just semantics, but I find choice of words can influence not only how I see things, but the emotions and thoughts that surround them.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium. What has helped me most: qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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Freespirit, I'm drawing so much inspiration from your story.

 

Thank you for writing it. 

 

13 hours ago, freespirit said:

I forgot to mention and I also had many of the cognitive symptoms for a long while--memory problems, concentration, general cog fog. Things got quite a bit better when I started working again, as I had to focus, learn new computer programs, interact more with people and so on. For a long time, I'd read and not be able to remember a thing I read. Now I'm back to being able to have several different books on the go and not only remember, but take far more enjoyment from reading. Since I'm not working right now, my brain isn't as sharp as it was. But still think I'm doing okay.

 

This part in particular is giving me a lot of hope. 

 

I wish you even more continued healing. 

 

Drug free May 22, 2015 after 30 years of neuroleptics, benzos, z-drugs, so-called "anti"-depressants, and amphetamines 

 

My Success Story:  Shep's Success: "Leaving Plato's Cave"

 

And what is good, Phaedrus, and what is not good — need we ask anyone to tell us these things? ~ Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance


I am not a medical professional and this is not medical advice, but simply information based on my own experience, as well as other members who have survived these drugs.

 

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7 hours ago, Shep said:

Freespirit, I'm drawing so much inspiration from your story.

 

Thank you for writing it. 

 

 

This part in particular is giving me a lot of hope. 

 

I wish you even more continued healing. 

 

I appreciate your good wishes Shep. I'm glad there was something encouraging in here for you. Healing can take a long time, but it can and does happen. You, like everyone on here, deserve be be healthy and happy.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium. What has helped me most: qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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Thank you for sharing your story. It's much appreciated.  
With very best wishes!

M.

Dec 1, 2016. 10 mg zyprexa for 1.5 month. Started taper mid-Jan. 2017. Cut 1.25 mg every 2 weeks; smaller cuts 2.5 mg down. Stopped at .6 mg. May 7, 2017: zyprexa free. 
Zoloft: Dec1, 2016, 200 mg. Started taper: Jun12, 2017: 197.5 mg; Jun19,:195 mg; July 2:185mg; July 9,:180 mg; July16,: 175; July 23: 170; July 30: 165; Aug6: 160; Aug13: 155; Aug. 20: 150; Aug.27: 146 mg; Sept3: 145 mg; Sept10:143 mg; Sept17:140 mg....Nov5: 122 mg...Dec3:112.5 mg; Jan14, 2018: 95 mg...Jan28: 90 mg; Feb21:80 mg; Mar11: 75 mg; May2:70 mg; May15: 68 mg; May28: 65 mg; Jun9: 62 mg;Jun25: 60 mg:July22: 55 mg; Aug25: 45 mg. Aug28: 50 mg...Oct 28: 38 mg; Dec.4: 30 mg; Jan8,2019: 25mg; Feb6: 23.5 mg; Apr1:17.5mg; May1:1 mg; May 5: 18;  May 18:15mg; June 16:12.5mg; Sept 10:11 mg; Sept.16:10 mg; Oct. 1: 9mg; Nov. 27: 8mg; Dec.5: 7mg; Jan.1,2020, 6 mg; Feb1: 5 mg; May 1: 2.5 mg; Jn 1: 2 mg; Jy 1: 1.5 mg
Spreadsheet: https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1pw4tjImAJ92OIVyRvZoZYjqxiKMk7wvp-ljiIi1olRo/edit#gid=0

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You have done whats impossible for some ! 

Please explain something to me you are a 63-year-old woman and your wife died ?

1995 to 1997: different antidepressants at maintenance dosages along with benzos 3 times a day.  

1998 to 2000: Citalopram 20mg + Benzo twice daily.

2001 to 2015: Sertraline 50 mg + Alprazolam (half of 0.25 mg once daily which is next to nothing)

2016 to 2017: Sertraline 50 mg + Dosulepin (Prothiaden) 25 mg (NO BENZO)

2017 to 2018: Dosulepin (Prothiaden) 50 mg  (NO BENZO)

2018 (Earlier): Olanzapine (Zyprexa) 5 mg + Clonazepam 0.25 mg x 2 daily (7 weeks on Olanzapine was a disaster, antipsychotics are not for panic disorder)

2018 August : Sertraline 50 mg for 20 days (couldn't take it any longer) + Clonazepam.

2018 Sept. 1st week: Dosulepin (Prothiaden) 25 mg + Clonazepam 0.25 mg -- 2018 Sept. 2nd week: Dosulepin (Prothiaden) 12.5mg +Clonazepam 0.25 mg 

2018 November: Clonazepam 0.50 mg at night (for sleep disturbed by tinnitus)

2019 January to now: Clonazepam 0.25 mg at night and 0.25 mg in the morning.

Remember: Going out for a Walk or for a Change does help, it may take a few days or weeks or months for some, but it definitely helps.

Here is Knowledge for you: The more you Know about your sickness the more bad it is for you, so forget about it !

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Thank you @Madeleine

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium. What has helped me most: qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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8 hours ago, Ather said:

You have done whats impossible for some ! 

Please explain something to me you are a 63-year-old woman and your wife died ?

Same-sex marriage became legal in our province in 2003 and then in all of Canada in 2005.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium. What has helped me most: qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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  • 2 weeks later...

Dear FreeSpirit,

 

Thank you for sharing your recovery story.  

 

Sharing here and on your thread all the physical, mental, emotional and spiritual parts of your journey have been so helpful to me. 

 

The fact that you started your withdrawal journey after the death of your wife and what you went through while mourning here is just powerful.   From what you shared, I know you did not always feel powerful and I understand that too.

 

I also respect that you waited to post your story till you felt inside it was time to do so. 

 

Thank you for revealing yourself so deeply here and on your thread.   Your honest and hard work have helped me survive during times of great fear.

 

Congratulations for getting off such a powerful medication.  

 Sept 2013-Apr 2014:  After death of my mom put on as series of meds. Zoloft 6 days, Lexapro1 day, Nortriptyline 10 days, Liquid Prozac 1 week, Cymbalta 1 week.

Got off Clonzapam: 1/2014-9/2014. After given Lamictal, stopped Clonzapam at .125mgs

Completed Remeron taper: 41.25 -0.025mgs  1/2015-4 2017. 

Completed Lamictal Taper: 200mgs-0.05 mgs 7/ 2015-11/2018. 

Clonazapam  December 2018. 0.625 Had paradoxical reaction to Lamictal wd, broke my heart to take a benzo but wasn't sleeping and not thinking straight. 28 March, 2019  4% taper Total: .625mgai   26 May, 2019  4% taper Total: .575 mgai,   24 June, 2019 2.5 % taper  10 Clonzapam tablets weigh1.999 mgpw  Average  200 mgpw.  0.0073mgai 9AM, 0.0073mgai 3PM, .415mgai, Total: 561mgai,  10 July, 2019 (Compounded pills) .0073mgai 9AM,.0073mgai 3PM, .415mgai,

Total .561mgai   26 August, 2019 (Back to regular pills due to bad reaction) .0078mgai 9AM, .01075mgai 3PM, .360mgai PM, Total: .545mgai   26 Sept. 2019 .0775mgai 9AM, .1mgai 3PM, 0.350mgai PM: Total: .5275mgai   31 Oct, 2019 .0750mgai 9AM, .0925mgai 3PM, 0.340mgai 930PM, Total: .5075mgai,   30 Nov. 2019 .0775mgai 9AM, .0825mgai 3PM, .3325mgai 9:30PM, Total:.490mgai   31 Dec. 2019 .0775mgai 9AM,  .080mgai 3PM, .3225mgai 9:30PM,  Total: .4775mgai   31 Jan. 2020 .0725mgai 9AM, .0750mgai 3pm, .315mgai 9:30PM, Total: .4625mgai    29 Feb. 2020  .0675mgai 9AM, .0675 3PM, .305 mgai 9PM Total: .440mgai 31 March 2020 .065mgai 9AM,  .065mgai 3PM, .2925mgai 10PM, Total: 4225mgai  30 April 2020 .0625mgai 9AM, .0625mgai 3PM, .2775mgai 10PM  Total: .4025mgai 31 May 2020 .0625mgai 9AM, .0625 mgai 3PM, .2526 mgai 10PM, Total: .3775mgai  30 June 2020 .0625mgai 9AM, .0625mgai 3PM  .2175 mgai 10PM Total .3425mgai.   31 July 2020 .0575 mgai 9AM .0550 mgai 3PM .180mgai 10PM Total .2925mgai  31 August 2020 .0475mgai 9AM, 0.045mgai 3PM, .01475mgai 10PM Total: .2375mgai  30 September 2020 0.0375mgai 9AM 0.035mgai 3PM 0.110mgai 10PM  Total: .1825mgai 31 October 2020 .0325mgai 9AM .0350mgai 3PM  .0725mgai 9PM

Total: .14mgai  30 Nov. 2020 .03mgai 9AM  .0276mgai 3PM 0.450mgai 9PM Total: .1025mgai 31 Dec. 2020 .02mgai 9AM .02mgai 3PM .02mgai 9PM Total: .06mgai

 

Additional Support:  Armour Thyroid 75mgs,  Vitamin D, Vitamin C, Magnesium Glycinate

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Thanks Hibari. Your support on this journey has been so important to me. You've always been so affirmative about my choices and ways of expressing myself. I've been grateful to share the path with you through this time. I'm always happy when something I've been through can help someone else along the way. I'm glad that my sharing has been of value to you.

 

I definitely have felt the opposite of powerful at times. But I think culturally, we are conditioned to view intense emotions and falling apart as some sort of failure. It's hard work to reclaim the reality that it takes courage to face what we have to in WD and through life in general. I find it's still important to be reminded of that fact.

 

 

ram dass.jpg

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium. What has helped me most: qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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  • 3 weeks later...

Thanks so much Freespirit! There are times in this withdrawal that I feel so bad that I want to give up. Stress can slam me hard with anhedonia and depression. I have been at this for 2 years and have had some really bad days lately. It's so wonderful to come to this site and find encouraging stories.

I cannot imagine losing a spouse during this time, I lost my father 6 months ago and I know it affected my recovery negatively...it still does. You have been through so much, thanks for coming back and sharing. I really appreciate it and will probably reread it multiple times when I get discouraged.

Nena

Oct 2016. 20 years fluoxetine (20 mg) and bupropion (400 mg). Ceased fluoxetine without taper and bupropion after 4 wk taper. Initial extreme fatigue resolved into moderate fatigue and depression with occasional brain zaps and tingling skin.
Oct 2017. Anhedonia, 90% of my day. Occasional anxiety. Milder brain zaps. In past two weeks, 3 window days and 11 wave days.
May 2019. Anhedonia, infrequent anxiety, mild brain zaps. Sleeping 6 hours nightly after lifetime of 8 hours. Typical daily pattern is wave until late afternoon, window until bedtime. Occasional full day windows.
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You're welcome Nena. I'm sorry to hear things have been more difficult lately. That must be very hard losing your father in the midst of WD. Grief definitely adds another layer to the process and can complicate things. The stress piece is very tricky too. It's almost impossible to know what will be "too much" until after the fact. All we can do is our best in terms of self-care and ride the waves that inevitably come. Sending healing thoughts your way.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium. What has helped me most: qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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This past month has been a difficult one in some ways. I'm still working on finding another place to live and have been met with more than a few roadblocks. So, there's been plenty of emotion that's come with this. Tomorrow, I'm leaving for 4 days to look in another area for housing. It will be my first time on a plane since starting WD. Thankfully, I am not having anxiety about any impact on my nervous system. My NS seems to be rolling with all of this, minus any real symptoms. And it seems like a sign of healing that my focus isn't on that aspect; it's on the practical aspects of finding a place and moving. I've been waking some mornings around 4, but not with WD anxiety. It's more a sense of both excitement and worry about the implications of a move this big.

 

With the help of acupuncture and the chiropractor, my hip pain has come down considerably. I've been able to exercise more and generally do activities of daily living without so much impairment.

 

I am still successfully using cannabis for pain. Recently was given a referral for medical cannabis, so will see the doctor for recommendations next week. Marijuana will be legal here for recreational use next month. But having access to medical grade has its advantages. Whatever I take will be more thoroughly tested and should be more consistent. The other advantage is that I'll be able to write the costs off on my income tax. I haven't taken CBD in awhile, because it seemed to lose effectiveness, but I'm  interested to try it again. At the beginning, it seemed like a miracle in terms of both pain and mood. I didn't try these things until I'd been off AD for several years, so maybe that's why there hasn't been any downside to using them. I have what I consider now, the same sensitivity I've always had to things.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium. What has helped me most: qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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manymoretodays

Oh freespirit,

You ARE doing it!!!  The move!  So proud of you.

Safe travels and the plane will be fine, just fine.

All my best in finding the best right place.

L, P, H, and G,

mmt

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016. 

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider. manymoretodays

 

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Freespirit,

 

Thank  you for sharing your recovery story.    You are an encouragement to me and will be for so many.

 

 

 

 

2010:  Escitalopram (Lexapro) 10 mg.   Mirtazapine (Remeron) 15 mg. 

2011:    Tapered Mirtazapine: 5 month successful taper.  Then tapered Lexapro:  4 month successful taper

May 2011 to August 2017:   No medications, full recovery

September 6, 2017:  started Mirtazapine (Remeron) 15 mg  - due to severe sudden insomnia (I believe caused by statin use)

November 16, 2017:   started Escitalopram (Lexapro) 10 mg

January 1, 2018 to October 30. 2020 -- 34 month taper off of Mirtazapine 15 mg to 0.00 mg

June 16, 2018:  Started micro taper taper of 10 mg Escitalopram (Lexapro)

Current (mgai):    2.23 mg  Escitalopram

Supplements:  Fish Oil, Curcumin, bio active B vitamins, zinc, magnesium glycinate, Vitamin D, Vitamin C, saffron

 

"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."  Matthew 6:34

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9 hours ago, manymoretodays said:

Oh freespirit,

You ARE doing it!!!  The move!  So proud of you.

Safe travels and the plane will be fine, just fine.

All my best in finding the best right place.

L, P, H, and G,

mmt

 

The move isn't for sure many more. I'm looking at an area near where I grew up. Never imagined I'd consider coming back. But I'm sick of the rain and  gray on the coast. Plus,  people here are friendly. I'd forgotten what that feels like and it's good. Tomorrow looking at properties and expect to se some family while I'm here. Bit of a whirlwind trip. Then waiting to find out about a mortgage and what I can sell my current house for. It feels good being here! Though I miss my cats.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium. What has helped me most: qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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2 hours ago, PH1 said:

Freespirit,

 

Thank  you for sharing your recovery story.    You are an encouragement to me and will be for so many.

 

 

 

 

Your acknowledgement is much appreciated.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium. What has helped me most: qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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  • Mentor

@freespirit: thank you for the recovery story. So inspirational and it gives me great hope that one can get through this. I think I am now hitting more evident perimenopause (just missed a cycle that was not directly due to high anxiety) and night sweats. I find it impossible to tease out what is that and what is WD. But your story gives me hope that maybe the worst of the mood problems will ease. I know we are all so different but stories like yours are, well, hopeful. And good luck with the move happening.

  • Prozac | late 2004-mid-2005 | CT WD in a couple months, mostly emotional
  • Sertraline 50-100mg | 11/2011-3/2014, 10/2014-3/2017
  • Sertraline fast taper March 2017, 4 weeks, OFF sertraline April 1, 2017
  • Quit alcohol May 20, 2017, quit coffee October 2017, quit cannabis 😩 July 2018
  • Magnesium powder, fish oil, estradiol, kombucha, gluten/dairy/histamine-lite
  • Lifestyle changes: AA, kundalini practice

 

"If you've seen a monster, even if it's horrible, that's evidence of divinity." – Damien Echols

 

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On September 11, 2018 at 7:52 PM, FarmGirlWorks said:

@freespirit: thank you for the recovery story. So inspirational and it gives me great hope that one can get through this. I think I am now hitting more evident perimenopause (just missed a cycle that was not directly due to high anxiety) and night sweats. I find it impossible to tease out what is that and what is WD. But your story gives me hope that maybe the worst of the mood problems will ease. I know we are all so different but stories like yours are, well, hopeful. And good luck with the move happening.

@FarmGirlWorks you're really getting hit. Way before AD, I went through a really stressful time (starting my own business , horrible breakup, and money worries). Had the worst perimenopause symptoms ever. I didn't understand back then how toxic stress could be on the body. You can't really tease out one thing from another in these circumstances ...but only respond as best you can. I know for some people calming practices don't work or are paradoxical, but in moderation, they have saved me. I've overdone them sometimes and had consequences. But still feel the benefits were worth it. Hope things ease for you.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium. What has helped me most: qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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  • 2 weeks later...

Well, I've taken the plunge and put my house up for sale. The main consequence is generalized anxiety, which I think is normal for the situation. It means not sleeping as well as I have been and I'm also feeling bit more irritable and stressed. But everything I practiced before and during WD is coming in handy. I've added extra qi gong and am doing a bit more exercise, plus the usual meditation. In surviving both the loss of my partner and going through WD, I feel I've already been through the worst. This is going to be a very major change, as I'm moving to a different province. I'm not sure how I'll manage to coordinate everything that needs to be done, but I keep telling myself I only have to take care of 1 thing at a time. Right now, that means keeping the house and garden immaculate for showings. Once I get an offer, I'll take the next step. I've found a home on the other end, but need an offer on my place first, before I can put a bid on it.

 

I listened to a talk on qi gong last week. The teacher said that when we are in situations beyond our control (which is most of life IMO), the thing to do is relax. I'm trying to retrain myself from the usual tension that happens when I'm in uncertainty. That means doing the things above and lots of deep breathing. It also means cuddling the cats, which helps both them and me. And I'm practicing a lot of self-talk to help get me through. If I an survive WD and grief, I can survive this too.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium. What has helped me most: qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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  • Mentor
6 hours ago, freespirit said:

If I can survive WD and grief, I can survive this too.

YES! Congratulations @freespirit.

  • Prozac | late 2004-mid-2005 | CT WD in a couple months, mostly emotional
  • Sertraline 50-100mg | 11/2011-3/2014, 10/2014-3/2017
  • Sertraline fast taper March 2017, 4 weeks, OFF sertraline April 1, 2017
  • Quit alcohol May 20, 2017, quit coffee October 2017, quit cannabis 😩 July 2018
  • Magnesium powder, fish oil, estradiol, kombucha, gluten/dairy/histamine-lite
  • Lifestyle changes: AA, kundalini practice

 

"If you've seen a monster, even if it's horrible, that's evidence of divinity." – Damien Echols

 

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Thanks FGW. This decision has its challenges, but so does staying in a place that doesn't work for me. The waiting and not knowing isn't easy. I'm sleeping better than I was though. Still waking a couple of times in the night, but usually able to go back to sleep quite quickly now. In general, am really feeling the benefits from all the different things I'm doing. I had periods of so much meditation, qi gong, etc and did not feel like the kind of rewards that are happening currently. All good.

 

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium. What has helped me most: qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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I wanted to add that a few weeks ago, I received a prescription for medical cannabis. I was seen by a doctor and nurse at the cannabis clinic. I'm taking CBD 3 times/day and THC oil once before bed. In general, my pain is much better managed than it was. I started off significantly lower and have gone slower than recommended. I don't know for sure, but I suspect the regular use of CBD is also helping to stabilize mood a bit. In any case, it's really nice having less pain. I can still go up quite a bit on both oils if I need to, but think I'll just hang out here for the time being.

 

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium. What has helped me most: qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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Wow! Beautiful story. You are amazing, brave and strong! Thank you for the hope. Histamine intolerance has been so hard for me but those supplements do help❤️  

 

Rachel - 1998-2012 Prozac 20mg

2012-2014 Prozac 40mg

Sept 17 Remeron 15mg, March ‘18 7.5mg

Jan 31 - Feb 13 1/4 - 1mg Ativan

Jan 31 - feb 5 - 2mg Prozac, 4mg feb 7

feb 10 - 10mg rem, Feb 27 - 7.5mg rem

Feb 27 - March 6th - 5mg Baclofen 

March 12th - Keppra 250mg

March 24 - 30mg phenobarbital 

 

 

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Thanks Rachellynn. Sorry to hear you've struggled with HI too. Good that you've found some help through supplements though. I don't feel particularly brave or strong, but I guess anyone who undertakes WD is or we wouldn't be doing it. Wishing you well with getting off Remeron.

Remeron for depression. Started at 7.5 mg. in 2005. Gradual increases over 8 years, up to 45 mg. in 2012.Began tapering in June 2013. Went from 45 to 30 mg in the first 3-4 months. Held for a couple of months.Started tapering by 3.75 mg every month or 2, with some longer holding periods. Eventually went down to 3.75 mg. about April 2014. Stopped taking Remeron August 2014. Developed issues with histamine a week after stopping--symptoms reduced through diet and a few supplements. Currently having issues with a few foods. Most of the histamine intolerance has resolved or is at least, in remission.

Current Medications:

Current Supplements: Cannabis (CBD and THC), Vitamin C, D, Quercetin, CoQ10, Tart Cherry, Probiotic, Phytoplankton oil, magnesium. What has helped me most: qi gong, exercise, healthy diet, meditation, IV vitamins, homeopathy, massage, acupuncture, chiropractic, music, and cuddling my cats..

My introduction: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/8459-mirtazapine-withdrawal-freespirit/#entry144282

Please note: I am not a therapist or medical practitioner. Any suggestions offered come solely from my personal experience in recovering from childhood trauma, therapy, and AD use. Please seek appropriate care for yourself.

 

“After a cruel childhood, one must reinvent oneself. Then re-imagine the world.”
Mary Oliver
 

 

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