Trojan: Hey everyone ;)

[Trojan]

I've been actively viewing this site for the last 8 month and think it's about time I posted. 

 

I was taking citalopram for 3 years (50mg), I then switched to sertraline on the advice of my doctor (200mg) and took this for 2 years. Since switching to Sertraline I ended up in a really bad way and was having an adverse reaction to them so in November 2017 I decided I was going to stop poisoning my body and get off them for good! 

 

I had tried previously in the past but after the 1 month mark things would get unbearable and my GP would say it's a return of your previous symptoms which I now know is absolute rubbish! 

 

I decided this time I would ride it regardless of how bad it got. 

 

I fast tapered from November 2017 and my last pill was February 28th 2018. I'm now 5 months off and currently in a pretty horrific wave which started 2 weeks ago but is now starting to ease up.

 

From December to April I was in absolute hell! I run a business and continue to and don't know how I kept it up, even now it's a real struggle. I had a window between June and July where I didn't feel great but most of the symptoms completely went away. 

 

The reason I started taking antidepressants was for anxiety but when I was look back that was brought on by burn out as I was working 12 hour days 6 days a week for pretty much 3 year. 

 

When I get a wave it's horrendous, my whole neck and chest will pretty much lock with anxiety, my breathing gets tight almost fight or flight mode, depressive feelings,immense fatigue, migraines, agitation, short temper. During waves I can just about function at work but after that I'm pretty much bed bound every night. The waves ease after a few weeks then I can some relief, I wouldn't class it as a window I get as I still feel anxious and overall pretty crap until the next wave starts which is debilitating! 

 

i know that the waves are withdrawal but how can I tell if the anxiety between the waves is induced by the withdrawal or if it's the way I really am? I would go to CBT or something similar but once another wave hits it would render any sort of mind training absolutely useless as the waves are that debilitating! 

 

Self care wise I need to do better, I work out at the gym around 3 days a week but my diet isn't great, I start supplements and don't keep them up, I still consume alcohol which makes me 100 times worse the next day but on the day I figure stuff it I can't feel any worse so have a few drinks. I need to make quilte a lot of changes to give my body and mind the best shot of getting through this. Thanks for reading

 

 

Edited August 16, 2018 by ChessieCat
spacing

[Altostrata]

Welcome, Trojan.

 

As you're aware if you read this site, you might have come off sertraline too fast for your nervous system. I am glad to hear your acute symptoms have diminished.

 

These waves are typical of prolonged withdrawal syndrome, not of the way anybody "really is."

 

Since it seems you are barely holding on through the waves, you might try a small reinstatement, such as 2mg, of sertaline. This often provides enough of a support for the nervous system so it can stabilize and move into the next phase of healing. You'd taper off by tiny amounts in some months.

 

This topic explains how to take a small amount of sertraline Tips for tapering off Zoloft (sertraline) A doctor might be able to prescribe the liquid for you, it doesn't have to be a psychiatrist.

 

See What is withdrawal syndrome?
 
About reinstating and stabilizing to reduce withdrawal symptoms
 
The Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization

[Trojan]

Hi Alto, thanks for the reply  I read up about the 10% taper prior to my taper but I had it in my head that I can tough it out and how much worse can it be than the way I was feeling on the sertraline at the time. As I found out, a lot worse. 

 

The past 7 month have been living hell. I should of reinstated a long time ago. I may have a go at reinstating at 1mg but I'm a bit concerned as my last dose was nearly 6 month ago! 

 

The past couple of days in this new wave I now have the flu like symptoms and migraines so bit fed up of it now and I think reinstating is worth a try, what have I got to lose!

[Altostrata]

Yes, that about sums it up. Let us know how you're doing.

[Trojan]

I reinstated last night with 2mg, I'll give it a few days and see how I feel. Thanks

[ChessieCat]

Please keep daily notes of your symptoms on paper which will help you see if reinstatement is working.  It will also help to be able to see if the dose needs to be adjusted.

[jozeff]

Hi Trojan, I feel very sorry for you. It must be so hard right now. Just listen to the people on this forum and take advantage of  their knowledge. You know, your doctor just talks to you for 10 minutes and sends you home with a prescription probably which will make things worse. They might even advise you to start benzos, venlafaxine, Prozac or whatever. I have been reading a lot about this stuff lately. Be very, very gentle to your nervous system right now. Since you're taking 2 mg now, that's what you are doing. Hold on and take one step at a time. Let us know how you're doing.

 

Good luck and stay focused.

 

Wish you all the best!

 

Jozeff

[Trojan]

Thanks for the replies! I've now reinstated for the last couple of days and in general I feel a lot better, I feel like I did a few weeks ago before this recent wave started.

 

The only thing still lingering today is the headache and most of the intense anxiety has now faded.

 

Whether that's off reinstatement I'm not sure as my previous waves would follow the same pattern, the waves would end with the last symptom being the headache and the following days there would be a moment where suddenly it would all vanish in a split second! The tension, anxiety, stomach cramps etc.

 

I do think reinstatement has helped and I certainly don't feel any worse! What do you advise maybe sticking on 2mg and see how it goes?

 

Thanks for the kind words Jozeff

I stopped trusting in the doctors view of SSRIs over a year ago. If I break my leg I'll go to the doctor but anything to do with how I'm feeling I keep well away. They have zero knowledge on the subject and if anything will make you 100 times worse! 

 

I was struggling on 100mg of sertraline and the doctor said,

 

'we'll put you on the maximum dose (200mg) and try that, what's the worst that can happen'

 

200mg turned me into an absolute wreck, I split with my partner and my life completely changed. Oh the joys!

 

Im pleased I finally posted, I've been trying to tough it out for the last nearly 8 month. I was having acute symptoms after my first month of tapering due to the massive reductions I was doing.

 

My thinking then was 'the quicker I get it out my body the less time the withdrawal will be although intense and I can move on, how wrong I was! I learnt the hard way and now it's time to do it right and give my nervous system a break if possible.

 

 

 

 

[Trojan]

Hey everyone, I’ve not posted much on here but I’d just like to see if anybody has had any similar symptoms to this and also get you’re advice to see if these symptoms can be withdrawal or if it’s what I’ve been left with after being on the meds!

 

It’s been 8 month since my last dose of Sertealine. I’d say that I’m definitely through the worst of it but I’m dealing with an identical pattern of anxiety which seems to be happening every 6 days (roughly) and lasts for maybe 4 or 5 days. 

 

It it starts with a headache on the first day and my eyes start straining, the 2nd day my stomach starts going in knots, my breathing becomes tight and my whole chest is tense, a lot of gastric issues start and I get massively fatigued and my head almost goes cloudy ( almost a spaced out feeling). This lasts for 4 or 5 days with no let up. It’s like my body is in a really anxious way but my mind isn’t anxious so have no idea why it’s starting! 

 

I never had had this before the meds but I’m worried that this is what I’ve been permanently left with! Do you think this could clear up in time  or is it something permanent that I should try to do something about? 

 

Thanks

[Junglechicken]

22 minutes ago, Trojan said:

Hey everyone, I’ve not posted much on here but I’d just like to see if anybody has had any similar symptoms to this and also get you’re advice to see if these symptoms can be withdrawal or if it’s what I’ve been left with after being on the meds!

 

It’s been 8 month since my last dose of Sertealine. I’d say that I’m definitely through the worst of it but I’m dealing with an identical pattern of anxiety which seems to be happening every 6 days (roughly) and lasts for maybe 4 or 5 days. 

 

It it starts with a headache on the first day and my eyes start straining, the 2nd day my stomach starts going in knots, my breathing becomes tight and my whole chest is tense, a lot of gastric issues start and I get massively fatigued and my head almost goes cloudy ( almost a spaced out feeling). This lasts for 4 or 5 days with no let up. It’s like my body is in a really anxious way but my mind isn’t anxious so have no idea why it’s starting! 

 

I never had had this before the meds but I’m worried that this is what I’ve been permanently left with! Do you think this could clear up in time  or is it something permanent that I should try to do something about? 

 

Thanks

 

Hi Trojan,

 

I'm dealing with IBS issues too....it sounds like you have IBS anyway.

 

My last dose of Lexapro was 16 April 2018 (7 months ago), so we're pretty close in timing.

 

My chest also gets tense, breathing tight (pretty much everything you've mentioned) happens plus the gastric issues.  Do you know what triggers and breaks the anxiety cycle for you?  You say you get these physical symptoms for 4-5 days?

 

JC

[Trojan]

Hey JC, yes I do get IBS symptoms but this only starts after the anxiety hits me. I have no idea what triggers and breaks it. It seems to disappear as fast as it starts. I really need to pay more attention and maybe start a journal to possibly work out the triggers. Is it possible there are no triggers and it’s the changes the brain is making during withdrawal? 

Maybe when I don’t have these symptoms I am over anxious without knowing and an eventual build up causes this every 5 days? I seriously have no idea 🙄

 

How often are you getting these symptoms, is it constant or in cycles?

[Junglechicken]

8 minutes ago, Trojan said:

Hey JC, yes I do get IBS symptoms but this only starts after the anxiety hits me. I have no idea what triggers and breaks it. It seems to disappear as fast as it starts. I really need to pay more attention and maybe start a journal to possibly work out the triggers. Is it possible there are no triggers and it’s the changes the brain is making during withdrawal? 

Maybe when I don’t have these symptoms I am over anxious without knowing and an eventual build up causes this every 5 days? I seriously have no idea 🙄

 

How often are you getting these symptoms, is it constant or in cycles?

 

It could just be that the serotonin levels in the gut have been compromised due to WD, and therefore for some people its cyclical, and for others, its kind of always there?  Yes, "Is it possible there are no triggers and it’s the changes the brain is making during withdrawal?" that is possible, because your brain is sending signals to your gut.

 

I'm bringing this up with my GP on Thursday, but this IBS episode seems to have been triggered by hormonal changes.....likely not relevant to you, but a nightmare for women in their 40s.  It started in early September of this year, has ebbed and flowed depending on my stress levels, but is still lurking ☹️

 

Am also taking a load of supplements to help with gut acidity levels.

 

I'm trying to learn (through CBT) how my mood affects my physical wellbeing (how my body reacts to moods).

 

 

 

 

 

 

[GirlfromD]

8 hours ago, Trojan said:

It’s been 8 month since my last dose of Sertealine. I’d say that I’m definitely through the worst of it but I’m dealing with an identical pattern of anxiety which seems to be happening every 6 days (roughly) and lasts for maybe 4 or 5 days. 

 

It it starts with a headache on the first day and my eyes start straining, the 2nd day my stomach starts going in knots, my breathing becomes tight and my whole chest is tense, a lot of gastric issues start and I get massively fatigued and my head almost goes cloudy ( almost a spaced out feeling). This lasts for 4 or 5 days with no let up. It’s like my body is in a really anxious way but my mind isn’t anxious so have no idea why it’s starting! 

 

Hello Trojan. 

I've also experienced something similar. The first year I was medicine free (Also from Sertraline) I experienced almost cycles or patterns, where different symptoms hit at certain times, also anxiety with the symtoms that you describe.

 

It was uncomfortable but disappeared over time, and became less and less noticeable as time went by. I certainly think this was caused by withdrawal symptoms and nothing permanent at all, as i never suffered from anxiety prior to the meds and i don't think your's sound like something permanent either.

 

It can be a good idea to write diary as you mentioned, that helped me see when things eased up, and to keep track on everything going on, symtoms etc. I hope things will lessen for you soon.

 

Best wishes 😊
Gfd.

[Trojan]

Thanks for the replies. I’m 100% that there are no triggers involved in this and this has to be withdrawal. My symptoms have now worsened and tonight I’m going to try and reinstate again. 

Folkowing up to the physical symptoms, last week they got really bad and this followed with what I would class as a mini mental breakdown! It felt as if my head blew a fuse, my mind went completely blank almost euphoric and my body went weak and I just wanted to crawl into bed and stay there. I can’t even describe the symptoms, I’m not depressed and it’s not standard anxiety it’s totally mind boggling. Now the physical symptoms are starting again.

 

I have no idea but think reinstatement is my only option. 

 

I meditate every day, go to the gym 5 times a week and do auto suggestion every day and nothing is having any effect on this state mind. 

 

Hi Gfd, I’ve read a lot about symptoms like this disappearing after a year but another 4 month of this will be worse than the acute period of coming off them. I just don’t want to put my body through any more stress than the last 2 weeks has caused.

[Junglechicken]

19 hours ago, Trojan said:

Thanks for the replies. I’m 100% that there are no triggers involved in this and this has to be withdrawal. My symptoms have now worsened and tonight I’m going to try and reinstate again. 

Folkowing up to the physical symptoms, last week they got really bad and this followed with what I would class as a mini mental breakdown! It felt as if my head blew a fuse, my mind went completely blank almost euphoric and my body went weak and I just wanted to crawl into bed and stay there. I can’t even describe the symptoms, I’m not depressed and it’s not standard anxiety it’s totally mind boggling. Now the physical symptoms are starting again.

 

I have no idea but think reinstatement is my only option. 

 

I meditate every day, go to the gym 5 times a week and do auto suggestion every day and nothing is having any effect on this state mind. 

 

Hi Gfd, I’ve read a lot about symptoms like this disappearing after a year but another 4 month of this will be worse than the acute period of coming off them. I just don’t want to put my body through any more stress than the last 2 weeks has caused.

 

Have you tried any supplements for the gut?  Also eating an alkalising diet?

 

TC,

JC

[Trojan]

Hi JC, no I haven't. I'm also suffering from low mood and an immense amount of anxiety. 

After reading up I seriously think that I have GAD (Generalised Anxiety Disorder). What I have been going through ticks all the boxes. I thought it was withdrawal but after reading about the symptoms I'm pretty certain it's this. 

I had pretty bad anxiety before my taper but not this bad. 

Im going to the doctors today to start a low dose of citalopram and start CBT. I can't keep passing this off as withdrawal, the last 2 month have been the worst I've felt in my life. 

[Trojan]

This time I’ll get my anxiety down to a manageable level before I decide to come off the tablets and also taper correctly, unlike this time. 😁

[Junglechicken]

6 hours ago, Trojan said:

Hi JC, no I haven't. I'm also suffering from low mood and an immense amount of anxiety. 

After reading up I seriously think that I have GAD (Generalised Anxiety Disorder). What I have been going through ticks all the boxes. I thought it was withdrawal but after reading about the symptoms I'm pretty certain it's this. 

I had pretty bad anxiety before my taper but not this bad. 

Im going to the doctors today to start a low dose of citalopram and start CBT. I can't keep passing this off as withdrawal, the last 2 month have been the worst I've felt in my life. 

 

Hi Trojan,

 

Diet won't solve all your current symptoms, but it will certainly help (esp. mood). 

 

Do you think you can talk to a Naturopath who could assist you with a diet change and advise re: the right supplements for you (everyone is different)?

 

I hope you find the CBT useful, I've been doing it for 5 weeks now and am still at the foundation stage.  Have been reading a book called "The Chimp Paradox" which is about mind management.

 

Hope it all goes well, keep us posted.

 

JC

[Altostrata]

Hello, @Trojan How are you doing?