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Maryb: Cymbalta

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Maryb

Admin note: link to benzo forum thread:  Maryb: Need Help with Alprazolam Inter dosing Withdrawals I think

 

I am on cymbalta 30mg for 4 years now. I wanted to try to come off cymbalta so, Back in September my doctor suggested I bridge to prozac for one month - he said stay on Prozac for one month and then after one month just stop.  That is what I did.  I was fine.  About one month later not being on anything I started getting major anxiety and fear/panic.  Doctor said go back on Prozac.  I did.  About 3 weeks later got really sick — I think mild serotonin syndrome.  He told me to stop the Prozac and go back on cymbalta.  I did.  I got better within a week.  So, from January to May I was fine and happy.  I had a few episodes of withdrawal (a couple of weekends) but they stopped.   I even went away on vacation to Mexico alone in April and was fine.  

 

In May i decided I would slow taper off cymbalta.  In order to do this I had to change to different beads.  I was originally on the large beads.  I needed the small beads.  I switched generics to get the small beads.  About a week in I could not adjust and started going through withdrawals.  Fear, agoraphobia, electrical feeling  vibrations through my arms and some parts of my body, especially during sleep, shivers, cold all the time then sweating, depression, cold not eat, had no desire for food, lost 20lbs., I tried to stick it out for about 4 weeks.  I could no longer and went back on the old generic. Here I am getting worse every day.  I do have windows - they come much later in the day.  I have had even several days of good days.  Lately, the morning I afternoon are the worst. 

 

Since the Prozac bridge it has been d m totally sick still 8 months later.  Is this normal or am I in protracted11 months.  Since the generic switch it has been 3 months.  I am still on cymbalta 30mg. Everyday I seem to get a new horrible symptom.  Major fear, agoraphobia which I never in my life had before, dizzy, very depressed, cant handle sound well, don’t really like the light, watching people enjoying life makes me ill, I have to avoid all stress, I can’t seem to be alone at my home, I’m staying with family until I try to return to work, I hate everything, I hate myself, I feel detached, I have no desire to bathe or look at myself in the mirror, no emotions, flat, and so many more things. I don’t seem to care about anything, some mornings, I can’t concentrate, have no memory, can’t comprehend things, things don’t make sense.  Will I get better and will things change?  I need some hope and reassurance.  I have some good days but more bad days.  Please help me. I need some encouragement.  Will I ever get back to who I was?  Why am I not adjusting?  I am currently on a leave of absence from work.  I am supposed to go back September 4.

 

Please some help if you have any knowledge or have gone through this.  Please only words of encouragement.  What are your thoughts?  Please don’t tell me to taper because I currently cannot unless I get a new script from a different manufacturer /different generic.  Im afraid to do that for fear of more shock to my brain. 

 

Will I ever get better?  How long?

 

Edited by Shep
reduced font/reformatted for easier reading (ChessieCat), added link to benzo forum thread (Shep)

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Altostrata

Welcome, Mary.

 

Are your symptoms better or worse at any time of day? How is your sleep? What is your daily symptom pattern? Please keep daily notes on paper about your symptoms, when you take your drugs, and their dosages. Use a simple list format with time of day on the left and notation (symptom, drug and dosage) on the right.

 

To help us out, follow these instructions Please put your drug and withdrawal history in your signature

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Maryb
Posted (edited)

Topic title:  Need help with Waves and Windows - still on 30mg Cymbalta

 

I am going through waves and windows too.  My story is:

September 2017 on cymbalta 20mg for 3 years - wanted off AD and doctor suggested to bridge to prozac for one month and then stop.  I stopped cymbalta beginning September (first week) and started prozac 20mg September (first week) for one month; October 1 stopped prozac - was on nothing for month of October; November 1 started feeling fear, anxiety depression; doctor suggested I go back on Prozac - November 2 - back on prozac 20mg and 3 weeks later felt very sick, nauseous, anxiety, chills, hot sweats, couldn't sleep, could not watch tv, could not leave house, fear, couldn't eat, felt weak, high blood pressure, fast heart rate, rigidity, went to hospital - I knew I had serotonin Syndrome - doctor/hospital would not confirm - was told to stop prozac and go back on cymbalta. December - back on cymbalta 20mg.  Took about a week and was feeling better.  Working throughout all of this.  Lucky my boss was not around often.  A couple of weekends went into withdrawal (cold, hot, sweating, could not eat, no joy, depressed) only lasted 2 days for a couple of weekends.  Went away to Mexico on vacation in April.  Came back and decided to switch my cymbalta generic which had 4 big beads to a generic with very small beads.  Two weeks in and I was feeling sick again - I tried for 4 weeks to stabilize on this new generic and I was so very sick the entire month.  My doctor advised me to go back on old generic, I went back on old generic in June and it was difficult - didn't really stabilize much - here and there I would get windows - maybe once a week towards end of day.  Still in withdrawal though.  Withdrawals got very back - memory, confusion, no joy, flat emotion, fear, agoraphobia, could not leave house, was in bed, could not eat much, and went out on FMLA leave from work.  In end of August wanted to taper again - changed to brand cymbalta with small beads to try one more to to taper.  Stayed on brand cymbalta for 3 weeks/upped dose to 40mg per doctor.  Didn't work- September 20th switched back to old generic Cymbalta on 30mg.  Still in withdrawals but getting windows here and there. End of September started to feel a little better - decided to return to work October 1.  Went into a window for almost 4 months with some residual withdrawal symptoms - back to myself - enjoying life.  March 9th weekend went into pretty bad withdrawal again.  Bad wave, nauseous, couldn't eat, very depressed, no hope, no feelings, crying, couldn't leave house still working.  I don't know how but managed.  I can't afford to lose my job.  I live alone and no help.  Here I am - some of the withdrawals have definitely subsided.  My main one has been anxiety, and not able to eat much although I force myself.  I must add:  I do not smoke, do not drink alcohol, eat very clean, juice green vegetables, get good sleep, no caffeine, I have a very stressful job.  I think I am currently in a wave but it's not so intense with the exception of scared to venture out of my comfort zone.  Past couple of days I was very very depressed - no hope, no joy. Today I don't feel the intense depression but I do feel some fear.  Oh and nights I go into windows.  Around 6/7pm recently not as good as they were last week. I'm scared and devastated this has happened.  I was such a happy person who loved life and everything about it.  No one in the medical industry - doctors, hospitals, psych doctors believe in PAWS (waves and windows) or withdrawals from ADs.  We are left alone to fend for ourselves. Such a scary lonely place to be.  Some of this info is not as descriptive as I would like.  I'm at work now while I write this.  So, please accept my apologies.

 

Any suggestions, input would be so appreciated.  I want to live and I want to heal so bad but I'm sooooooo scared.

 

Thank you so much.

 

Edited by ChessieCat
added topic title

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ChessieCat
Posted (edited)

SA recommends tapering by no more than 10% of the current dose followed by a hold of about 4 weeks to allow the brain to adapt to not getting as much of the drug.  Why taper by 10% of my dosage?

 

When we taper using this protocol we may experience mild withdrawal symptoms.  However when the drug is taken away too quickly we can get withdrawal symptoms which are more than mild:  Dr Joseph Glenmullen's Withdrawal Symptoms

 

Tips for tapering off Cymbalta (duloxetine)

 

 

Please create your drug signature using the following format.   Keep it simple.  NO diagnoses or symptoms please - thank you.

  • details for last 2 years - dates, ALL drugs, doses
  • summary for older than 2 years - just years and drug/s

Account Settings – Create or Edit a signature

 

 

This is your own introductions topic where your can ask questions about your own situation and journal your progress.

Edited by ChessieCat

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ChessieCat

Here's some additional information which might help you to understand what is happening:

 

Recovery isn't linear it happens in a Windows and Waves Pattern

 

Withdrawal Normal Description


When we take a psychiatric drug, we are adding chemical/s to the brain.  The brain then has to change to adapt to getting the chemical/s.  It might have to change something to do with A and then once that change has been made it affects B so another change has to be made and so on down the line.  It is a chain reaction, a domino effect.

 

The same thing happens when we take the drug away.  That's why it's possible to experience such a vast array of withdrawal symptoms, and they can change, and be of different intensity.

 

are-we-there-yet-how-long-is-withdrawal-going-to-take

 

These explain it really well:

 

Video:  Healing From Antidepressants - Patterns of Recovery

 

On 8/31/2011 at 5:28 AM, Rhiannon said:

When we stop taking the drug, we have a brain that has designed itself so that it works in the presence of the drug; now it can't work properly without the drug because it's designed itself so that the drug is part of its chemistry and structure. It's like a plant that has grown on a trellis; you can't just yank out the trellis and expect the plant to be okay. When the drug is removed, the remodeling process has to take place in reverse. SO--it's not a matter of just getting the drug out of your system and moving on. If it were that simple, none of us would be here. It's a matter of, as I describe it, having to grow a new brain. I believe this growing-a-new-brain happens throughout the taper process if the taper is slow enough. (If it's too fast, then there's not a lot of time for actually rebalancing things, and basically the brain is just pedaling fast trying to keep us alive.) It also continues to happen, probably for longer than the symptoms actually last, throughout the time of recovery after we are completely off the drug, which is why recovery takes so long.

 

AND

 

On 12/4/2015 at 2:41 AM, apace41 said:

Basically- you have a building where the MAJOR steel structures are trying to be rebuilt at different times - ALL while people are coming and going in the building and attempting to work.

It would be like if the World Trade Center Towers hadn't completely fallen - but had crumbled inside in different places.. Imagine if you were trying to rebuild the tower - WHILE people were coming and going and trying to work in the building!  You'd have to set up a temporary elevator - but when you needed to fix part of that area, you'd have to tear down that elevator and set up a temporary elevator somewhere else. And so on. You'd have to build, work around, then tear down, then build again, then work around, then build... ALL while people are coming and going, ALL while the furniture is being replaced, ALL while the walls are getting repainted... ALL while life is going on INSIDE the building. No doubt it would be chaotic. That is EXACTLY what is happening with windows and waves.  The windows are where the body has "got it right" for a day or so - but then the building shifts and the brain works on something else - and it's chaos again while another temporary pathway is set up to reroute function until repairs are made.  

 

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ChessieCat

After you have created your drug signature, please post advising that you have done.  Thank you.

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Maryb
Posted (edited)
Duloxetine 20mg - Started May 2015 

Wanted to get off AD so doctor suggested bridging to Prozac

Prozac 20mg - September 1, 2017 -  October 1, 2017 

October 2017 nothing for one month

Prozac 20mg  November 2017 - for 3 weeks 

Duloxetine 20mg November (last week of November)

 

May 2018 - changed Duloxetine generic

June 5, 2018 back on old generic with big beads


August 2018 - changed from Duloxetine generic to brand name cymbalta for 3 weeks - 

September 25, 2018 old generic 30mg duloxetine and have not made any changes (currently on 30mg duloxetine for 5 1/2 months)

 

Edited by ChessieCat
removed duplicated info

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ChessieCat
10 minutes ago, Maryb said:

Yes, I am experiencing windows every night - starts around 6pm and it’s wonderful but then I wake up in a wave.  Can you tell me what the outcome was? Have you fully resolved in window or still having waves?  Would love to know.  Thank you. 

 

I've moved your post to RusTW's Introduction topic because he might not have seen it in the Windows and Waves topic.

 

rustw-seroquel-ct-then-reinstated

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Maryb

Thank you ChessieCat, I appreciate your help with this site.  I'm not familiar with how it works yet.  Plus I'm going through withdrawals and working full time job.  I just want to get better like before I started messing around with the doses/tapering.  Honestly, I was doing very good on 20mg cymbalta with a few side effects.  All of my symptoms started months after the bad bridge.  Does my signature copy on itself after every post or comment?  I hope so because I don't know how I can keep copying and pasting each time I respond to something or make a new post.

 

Thank you very much.

 

Regards,

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RusTW

Thanks CC

Hello Maryb you may have had what @Gridleyexplained to me as delayed W/D.The large window may have been what's called the honeymoon period.Dont trip out.Your brain is trying to correct itself. I had some nice windows in January and February then in March got hit hard after a fast taper that i started January. 

After my ct of seroquel it took 3 weeks until wd hit.i reinstated though at that point . From there I was getting most of my windows like you in the evening with sporadic day windows that were pretty rare.

Now my wave patterns are very unpredictable I just had an 11 day wave. Prior to that I would have three good days of windows two or three bad days of waves cycling. Now again it seems like I'm going back to that cycle.

It's very good that you're getting windows. I would hold off on any changes.

Was there anything that could have triggered this wave 4 you. Was there any major stresses diet changes supplement changes or anything else you can think of that may have affected your nervous system.

Do your best to roll with it and don't let your fears add to the situation. Continue to use non drug coping strategies to get through this.

I'm available for any specific questions just let me know

Russ

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Maryb

Hi RusTW,

 

Thank you so much for your reply.  

 

Can you tell me what are some of your symptoms.  I am in a cab heading home from work (scheduled half day) and will write not when I get situated.  I work a full time job at a law firm and that is a huge stressor for me.  

 

Will be be back in touch shortly.

 

Regards, 

Mary

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Maryb

Yes, a friend of mine who I had not been in touch with for 6 years got in touch with and that made me extremely uneasy. We spoke on the phone and after that I could tell I was going to be in a wave.  It was pretty bad.  I could not eat, so nauseous, no joy, very hopeless, a few days of absolute horrible deep dark thoughts.  Thinking this will never get better and how can I go on and how can I work.  Then after 3 days of that some things lessoned and some things changed.  I’m crying a lot which I find very cathartic and helpful.  I get very fearful too where I am afraid of people, places and things and it causes me to get very tense.  

 

By the way, I have never experienced anything like these symptoms before my doctor tapered me incorrectly.  

 

I find it so strange that at around 7pm I have windows and pretty much feel almost like my REAL self.  At around 7am it starts changing again to wave.  The waves are not as intense as it was when this first started.  I hope things will get less and less intense and waves shorter.  

 

I have not touched my dose of 30mg for almost 6 months and I have absolutely no plan to change anything until I am completely out of these wave/windows.  Do you think I will get back to me and do you think I am maybe half way there?  I know all had questions to answer.  

 

Thank you very mich for your kind response and help/support. 

 

Mary

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Gridley
3 hours ago, Maryb said:

Does my signature copy on itself after every post or comment? 

 

Yes, it appears at the bottom of each of your posts.

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Maryb

Thank you Gridley.  Any insight on the windows in the evening and back into wave in morning throughout the day.  I had a wind from October through beginning of March.  I had some residual negative symptoms but nothing I couldn’t handle.  It was amazing being in that window.  I just don’t understand how or why this is happening and I get scared that I will get stuck in a wave.  

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Dejavu

Hi maryb, just wanted to drop in and say hi. I am also in the legal industry and I know the hideous professional stress you are under. I too must work, and find it almost impossible to do at times. Non stop pressure and critical deadlines do not help to calm and heal our sensitive nervous systems. And like you, I too am awaiting stabilization before I can taper. Feel free to reach out if you need to vent about work and withdrawal. Sending you healing energy today!

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withhopeinmyheart

Hi Mary, 

 

it is very common in withdrawal that it gets easier in the evening. A lot of people report this. 

I'm not sure that this is also called a window, as windows and waves aren't connected to any schedule. 

 

In the morning you're getting cortisol surges. It's normal for everybody as it's the natural hormone to wake you up. But in withdrawal it can be very much exaggerated, which leads to very early waking, often with fear and panic attacks. 

 

It's typical that you feel the symptoms more intensely during the first half of the day and as the cortisol fades it gets better in the afternoon or even. 

 

Unfortunately there's no telling how long windows and waves are going to last. It's good that your last window was nice and long. 

 

I wish your next one will come very soon. 

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RusTW

Your evening windows will start earlier in the day eventually. Yes they are connected to cortisol levels that cause the same thing in the morning .

Later on windows would start in the morning and last all day or just start earlier in the day. They are windows. Off and on now I'm getting multiple window days with low symptoms. One thing I do get during my waves sometimes are no windows at night and insomnia if that happens to you don't trip out because it will adjust again. You can get cortisol surges anytime of the day but its highest early in the morning.

Like Alto mentioned blackout your windows so you can sleep a little bit longer.

There are indicators of Windows coming you have to pay attention to that. Mine are altering withdraw thoughts racing then alternating to normal thinking back and forth and then a window will come. I'll catch myself saying oh that was a normal thought and then it'll go right back into withdrawal thinking. This was a marker for me since the beginning. It's probably different for each person but it's important to pay attention to indicators.

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RusTW

I encourage you to keep working. It's good to keep your mind functioning at normal levels and not giving in to sitting around the house thinking about withdrawals.

I attribute most of my progress to going to work and having that part of my day be semi normal and making myself function normal in front of everybody. Fake it until you make it as they say.

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Maryb

I want to say thank you to everyone who has commented.  The support is so important to getting through this very difficult and unexplainable illness.  I don’t know what else to call this “illness”?  

 

I am trying very hard to push myself even though some days are extremely hard and I have no joy or hope. The deep dark thinking and depression is very difficult.  Looking at other people laughing and enjoying life is hard when I’m having these symptoms. Things I’ve always loved I no longer care about.  It leaves me flat.  It’s getting less and less intense and those thoughts are not staying long.

 

 Things have been changing quickly this past week with my symptoms. Is that normal?  I will say I think what I eat changes my symptoms.  I notice if I stay completely away from sweets, my withdrawals are less.  

 

Thank you everyone for for being here and helping me and others.  It is truly one of the things that is keeping me going.  Knowing there is light at the end of the tunnel. I want to live and be my old self with out these unpredictable waves and windows.  

 

God bless.  I will keep checking in. 

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Maryb
13 hours ago, RusTW said:

I encourage you to keep working. It's good to keep your mind functioning at normal levels and not giving in to sitting around the house thinking about withdrawals.

I attribute most of my progress to going to work and having that part of my day be semi normal and making myself function normal in front of everybody. Fake it until you make it as they say.

Good saying “fake it till you make it”. Easier said than done but so true.  I don’t want anyone at work to recognize my dread.  Last summer I went through horrific withdrawals and went out on FMLA leave.  I could not leave my house.  I was out for 6 weeks. I was so scared I would never get better.  One of my hardest symptoms was confusion, very strong fear (agoraphobia) which paralyzes me.  Those have lessoned a lot.  

 

Will i get back to myself?  Will these symptoms all go away?  How does it work?  Will it just get less and less intense, less and less length of time? 

 

What was was a few of your horrible

symptoms?

 

Thank you so much. 

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Kostas
On 3/22/2019 at 2:25 AM, ChessieCat said:

 

I've moved your post to RusTW's Introduction topic because he might not have seen it in the Windows and Waves topic.

 

rustw-seroquel-ct-then-reinstated

Hi Mary, 

Ye I was in a wave / window pattern (more in a wave!), which appeared almost 4 years after completely off the drug! 

They lasted for almost 2 years, and gradually the windows started becoming longer, and the waves shorter and less intense. 

All shorts of symptoms appeared during this period. 

Now for a year I feel fine, and hope it lasts for ever! 

So it seems there is hope! 

Take care. 

 

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Maryb

Oh how could it show up four years later?  That doesn’t make very much sense.  Although glad you are no longer experiencing waves.  I think it’s very important to let people know there is hope and these symptoms come and go and it’s normal in withdrawals.  I want to live and I get scared sometimes I will never get better.  I have to say withdrawal wave symptoms have gotten less intense but they change quickly unlike how they were in the beginning.  I would get long windows and very intense long waves.  So now they are being broken up.  Does that make sense.  

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Maryb

What does it mean to quote a post?  Sorry, I’m new here and don’t know this site well.  Thank you. 

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RusTW
5 hours ago, Maryb said:

Good saying “fake it till you make it”. Easier said than done but so true.  I don’t want anyone at work to recognize my dread.  Last summer I went through horrific withdrawals and went out on FMLA leave.  I could not leave my house.  I was out for 6 weeks. I was so scared I would never get better.  One of my hardest symptoms was confusion, very strong fear (agoraphobia) which paralyzes me.  Those have lessoned a lot.  

 

Will i get back to myself?  Will these symptoms all go away?  How does it work?  Will it just get less and less intense, less and less length of time? 

 

What was was a few of your horrible

symptoms?

 

Thank you so much. 

Yes you will return to normal. Takes time and acceptance 

My worst symptoms are akithisia anxiety fog fatigue paranoia...comes in waves every few days

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Maryb

I am confused and having difficulties making decisions lately.  I can’t tell the difference between windows and waves as they have changed.  I am not happy and don’t have anything to look forward to.  I feel sort of lifeless.  Just doing what I’m supposed to do to get through the days.  

 

I know I’m in a wave because my windows used to be wonderful.  My wave is getting less intense starting around 3pm but it’s still not completely who I am in a window.  I keep asking myself why did this happen to me?  I have major fear it will not get better.  I’m afraid. 

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Maryb
On 3/22/2019 at 4:16 PM, withhopeinmyheart said:

Hi Mary, 

 

it is very common in withdrawal that it gets easier in the evening. A lot of people report this. 

I'm not sure that this is also called a window, as windows and waves aren't connected to any schedule. 

 

In the morning you're getting cortisol surges. It's normal for everybody as it's the natural hormone to wake you up. But in withdrawal it can be very much exaggerated, which leads to very early waking, often with fear and panic attacks. 

 

It's typical that you feel the symptoms more intensely during the first half of the day and as the cortisol fades it gets better in the afternoon or even. 

 

Unfortunately there's no telling how long windows and waves are going to last. It's good that your last window was nice and long. 

 

I wish your next one will come very soon. 

Thank you withhopeinmyheart, so the times that I feel okay are not waves and windows?  I’m so confused and so not well again.  I hate who I am in these withdrawals and don’t know if things will ever change. This is not a good quality of life. It’s sad and it’s confusing and it’s so hard to deal with.  Thank you for your kind words . 

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RusTW
2 hours ago, Maryb said:

I am confused and having difficulties making decisions lately.  I can’t tell the difference between windows and waves as they have changed.  I am not happy and don’t have anything to look forward to.  I feel sort of lifeless.  Just doing what I’m supposed to do to get through the days.  

 

I know I’m in a wave because my windows used to be wonderful.  My wave is getting less intense starting around 3pm but it’s still not completely who I am in a window.  I keep asking myself why did this happen to me?  I have major fear it will not get better.  I’m afraid. 

Maryb sounds like brain fog.its common in wd.take it slow and focus.try not to overthink what's happening. 

Exercise  good diet meditation  walks music .do everything in moderation. 

It's good your getting widows.they change so do the waves.everything fixing itself in patches.so different symptoms and patterns.journal this experience .

 

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Maryb
4 minutes ago, RusTW said:

Maryb sounds like brain fog.its common in wd.take it slow and focus.try not to overthink what's happening. 

Exercise  good diet meditation  walks music .do everything in moderation. 

It's good your getting widows.they change so do the waves.everything fixing itself in patches.so different symptoms and patterns.journal this experience .

 

I am crying because I want my life back and I am having some severe fear issues again where I can’t teally wave my apartment. I don’t know why this is happening.  I appreciate your elp

so much but some people’s withdrawals are more extreme then others and I’m trying to hard to manage it.  All I can do it force myself to work.  The feelings are changing from day to day.  I (we) did nothing to deserve this.  I had the most happiest life before this.  No anxiety, no depression before this medication.  I had a few panic attacks which actually I learned how to deal with and why I wanted to get off cymbalta.  I know you’re trying to help me and I totally appreciate it.  It’s supposed to be a beautiful day today and I have no desire or care that it’s going to be beautiful.  I am so very sad. 

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RusTW

Accepting this situation is key.Dont despair you will heal.

You have to continue to live your life.Work is good.it will help your brain to focus and forget symptoms. 

You will have a happy life again.

Dont hate your wd self.learn from it.and accept it as temporary. It is

Be courageous you will b ok

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withhopeinmyheart

Hi Mary, 

 

didn't mean to confuse you. It doesn't really matter if it's called a window. All I know is many report the relief in the evening. 

 

I must say, while I find it really nice and good how RusTW gives support and encourages you, I have the feeling that you might take it to push yourself too much. 

 

Let me explain. I read those words so often. You know, fake it till you make it, keep working, live your life. I know why RusTW says this and I understand. 

 

But in the end everyone's withdrawal is different. And words like those almost broke me because I thought I couldn't make it without pushing myself. 

 

I did put so much pressure on myself because I really almost can't do anything throughout the day. 

 

And I know your symptoms like fear and agoraphobia. It's hell. 

 

What I mean to say is, it's good if you can continue to work. But also rest enough. Don't push yourself too hard to keep a normal life. It can put a lot of stress on your nervous system. 

 

Keep going but only do what you can. 

 

Sending hugs! 

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Maryb
2 hours ago, withhopeinmyheart said:

Hi Mary, 

 

didn't mean to confuse you. It doesn't really matter if it's called a window. All I know is many report the relief in the evening. 

 

I must say, while I find it really nice and good how RusTW gives support and encourages you, I have the feeling that you might take it to push yourself too much. 

 

Let me explain. I read those words so often. You know, fake it till you make it, keep working, live your life. I know why RusTW says this and I understand. 

 

But in the end everyone's withdrawal is different. And words like those almost broke me because I thought I couldn't make it without pushing myself. 

 

I did put so much pressure on myself because I really almost can't do anything throughout the day. 

 

And I know your symptoms like fear and agoraphobia. It's hell. 

 

What I mean to say is, it's good if you can continue to work. But also rest enough. Don't push yourself too hard to keep a normal life. It can put a lot of stress on your nervous system. 

 

Keep going but only do what you can. 

 

Sending hugs! 

I want to say I am crying as I read this thread.  I’m struggling with fear, and high anxiety in the morning even confusion and I have to wake up M-F and get to work by 8:30am.  It scares me so because I’m afraid I won’t be able to do my job and deal with a very stressful boss. I am still on my antidepressant after being tapered so horrible wrong.  It’s been since September -December 2017; then I did a generic change which really caused major withdrawals that were unbearable.  I’m still experiencing withdrawals.  I’m currently in a wave.  I’m so scared and full of fear and anxiety.  I find this site to be very helpfully.  It gives me hope.  I need hope.  I want to live and I want to have my life back that I truly loved and was so happy and full of joy.  I hope to hear from you all.  God bless.  

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Maryb
Just now, Maryb said:

I want to say I am crying as I read this thread.  I’m struggling with fear, and high anxiety in the morning even confusion and I have to wake up M-F and get to work by 8:30am.  It scares me so because I’m afraid I won’t be able to do my job and deal with a very stressful boss. I am still on my antidepressant after being tapered so horrible wrong.  It’s been since September -December 2017; then I did a generic change which really caused major withdrawals that were unbearable.  I’m still experiencing withdrawals.  I’m currently in a wave.  I’m so scared and full of fear and anxiety.  I find this site to be very helpfully.  It gives me hope.  I need hope.  I want to live and I want to have my life back that I truly loved and was so happy and full of joy.  I hope to hear from you all.  God bless.  

Thank you so much for your kind words and hope.  I need hope because this suffering is horrible and I sometimes feel no hope.  

 

Sending prayers.  🙏🙏

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MMMM

Hi Mary, I can relate to how you feel, and I also find all of this tremendously scary and get very afraid sometimes. You will be ok. We will be ok. Do you have family and support nearby? I read somewhere that you just need to have close ones keep telling you over and over again that you will be ok. I do find that that helps me somewhat. I also loved life before this and will be soooo grateful when I can get back to that. God bless you.

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Maryb
8 hours ago, MMMM said:

Hi Mary, I can relate to how you feel, and I also find all of this tremendously scary and get very afraid sometimes. You will be ok. We will be ok. Do you have family and support nearby? I read somewhere that you just need to have close ones keep telling you over and over again that you will be ok. I do find that that helps me somewhat. I also loved life before this and will be soooo grateful when I can get back to that. God bless you.

Hi MMMM, thank you for your kind words.  I truly wish I understood what was going on and why I am still withdrawing while I’m still taking cymbalta?  I know it’s called post acute withdrawal from the bad taper of my doctor removing the drug so quickly but it’s been over one year already.  However, also I did try to switch the generic to small beads so I could taper properly but could not stabilize on those beads and I tried for a while month.  This is so very difficult and I’m trying very hard to manage my life so people don’t notice.  I only have one very good friend who believes me and understands and is supper supportive.  Others don’t believe it or understand and don’t care to.  I hope I can make it through this.  I’m trying so hard.  Thank you so much for your kind words.  God help me and all of us. 

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Rosetta

Maryb,

Im sorry you are feeling so bad.  It really will get better and you will heal.  It takes so long that you will lose hope sometimes, but then you will find hope again.  Always remember, this is temporary.  Try to distract and take care of yourself when you can.

Rosetta

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gardenlady

MaryB, I'm also tapering Cymbalta and it's brutal.  I'm down from 60 mg to 15 mg and it's been a nightmare the whole way down even tho I'm doing a proper slow taper.  I cut 2 beads per week right now which is about a 10%/month cut rate.  I figure it will take me another 3 years to finish.  I considered a Prozac bridge but am too frightened to try.

 

Perhaps when you stabilize you can try to switch to a generic duloxetine with the small beads.  I know you tried before unsuccessfully, but maybe you were too unstable.  

 

Just letting you you know there is another Cymbalta sufferer out here!

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