Allreadygone: need help

[Altostrata]

Hi, Allready, please be sure to include drugs and dosages in every report.

 

How about moving that 12.5mg Lamictal an hour later?

 

When do you usually have twitching?

[Allreadygone]

I’m thinkin hard on lamictal as I’m scared from all this but I’m gonna start tues on a work day moving up an hour @AltostrataThe twitching is most all day off on.

[Altostrata]

Where is the twitching? What's it like?

 

I would like you to start moving 12.5mg Lamictal an hour later as soon as possible. I think it will help.

[Allreadygone]

Ok,the twitching is mostly in my eyes,it does come from chest as as well @Altostrata

[Altostrata]

When does the twitching occur?

[Allreadygone]

All thru the day more when I’m still @Altostrata

[Allreadygone]

4am-up Laid in bed

545-31.25 Effexor 37.5 lamictal 5linsinopril

645-12pm worked,ate banana

730,Depression,knot in stomach,Depersonalization intrusive thoughts,death stuff,overall nothing feels good or positive,twitches all usual stuff but to a lil less degree

12-430 took fish oil as I do everyday have forgot to put that,ate grilled sandwich and soup appetite low.finished at work,talked with wife about finding new rental house to move into

5-7-ran and worked out,always feel symtoms all there but can focus a lil when I’m running other than Depersonalization which is my constant thought makes it very hard to interact,look in mirror etc

730-ate dinner was able to eat reg food salmon,rice

8-10was able to sit and watch tv,journal,study SA and wds

1030-7.5 remeron

 

@Altostratadid have a convo with co worker where I felt Lil present.1football league is over now 1 left then I have to tell everyone I’m done with that have to concentrate on healing.That stuff was impossible for me not sure how I’m doin it 

Edited October 30, 2018 by Altostrata
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[Altostrata]

I don't believe you have to quit your football league activities now -- they start up next year again, correct?

 

Your symptom pattern sounds a little better.

 

How about moving 12.5mg Lamictal an hour later in the day? Your system probably won't even notice it.

[Allreadygone]

Yes next April,I can’t function like this I barely can make it thru work.Symtoms were a hair less severe.I moved the lamictal up sun and today and no difference in wds.Still having crippling depression,anxiety,Depersonalization,knot in stomach,Wired but tired.Just trying to survive it hoping one day it will lesson as this is Hell on earth @AltostrataTwiching there but not as hard.

[Altostrata]

On 10/29/2018 at 12:02 PM, Allreadygone said:

4am-up Laid in bed

545-31.25 Effexor 37.5 lamictal 5linsinopril

645-12pm worked,ate banana

730,Depression,knot in stomach,Depersonalization intrusive thoughts,death stuff,overall nothing feels good or positive,twitches all usual stuff but to a lil less degree

12-430 took fish oil as I do everyday have forgot to put that,ate grilled sandwich and soup appetite low.finished at work,talked with wife about finding new rental house to move into

5-7-ran and worked out,always feel symtoms all there but can focus a lil when I’m running other than Depersonalization which is my constant thought makes it very hard to interact,look in mirror etc

730-ate dinner was able to eat reg food salmon,rice

8-10was able to sit and watch tv,journal,study SA and wds

1030-7.5 remeron

 

This is from yesterday -- is it correct regarding Lamictal?

[Allreadygone]

yes @Altostrata I guess not wanting to die every minute is the thing that is somewhat better.Came up less yesterday 

[Altostrata]

It doesn't show any change in your Lamictal dosing. You said you've moved 12.5mg twice.

[Allreadygone]

That was my mistake I moved to 645  yesterday and today I moved it up an hour. @Altostrata

[Allreadygone]

I’ve had Lil momemts of relief in past 45 days but mainly disabling Symtoms I know it takes time to get relief Once destabilized just pray it happens.I love my family and can’t be with them rn at all,it’s slways uncomfortable living with DP but without all these horrible Symtoms I can manage it. @Altostrata

[Altostrata]

What time did you take 12.5mg Lamictal today? Please include in your symptom notes today.

 

I know you're feeling miserable, hang in there. Give yourself credit, it's been hard but you've managed to hold it together so far. You're stronger than you know. You're going to be okay.

[Allreadygone]

Thx for ur inspirational words,lamictal was at 745 today @Altostratai usually do notes around 8-9.In your opinion do u think I’m in severe wds from tapering to fast and trying to updose lamictal?Or am I permanently this way?will my chemicals get to a better place?

[Altostrata]

I think you are having adverse effects from the drugs you're taking, not withdrawal syndrome. Or, withdrawal syndrome is relatively minor compared to the adverse effects.

 

You're not permanently like this, only while you're taking your drug cocktail.

 

I am trying to get you relatively comfortable so you can taper Effexor, which is causing a lot of problems, including high blood pressure. Your doctors have been remiss for years in not addressing this.

 

Aren't you taking 31.25mg Effexor now? Please don't copy your symptom notes from day to day, it looks like your October 29 notes are wrong in important ways.

[Allreadygone]

Ok Now I look that is Wrong front m 29th that was 28th sorry .i was some what stable for 5/6 yrs on 75mgs after I dropped From 150 along with gettin off 2/3 other drugs as I was in similar state.This all started after I had a bad reaction to brain supp 2 years ago and I figured I Shouid try to lower Effexor since I was already having Symtoms,Got to 31.25 with full plate of stress/commitments,then wheels came off again. @Altostrata

[Allreadygone]

So yesterday to 645 lamictal,today 745.I don’t mind moving lamictal just not to late in day cause it’s activating for me.can a drug become toxic as u lower dose?

[Altostrata]

I need to see accurate daily symptom notes to answer your questions !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

You may not have any adverse effects AT ALL from moving the Lamictal.

[Allreadygone]

I’m sorry,just scared for my life.Ok I will do yesterday and today tonite @AltostrataI do appreciate you tryin to help,Ii know how valuable your time is 

[Allreadygone]

Mon-29th(up 4am)

545-Took 31.25effexor,5mgs linsinopril,25mgs lamictal

7-330)try stay busy day off,forced clam chowder)(worked at storage)(Knot in stomach, Depersonalization,depression,anxiety,intrusive thoughts were there but not as sharp,twitching Lil less overall sense of dread)

4-6 gym ran and weights/Symtoms usually tad less while workin out)

7-10 ate with no appetite usually by 8 can sit and watch tv,read SA.Twitches when still other Symtoms less at night usually other than fear or another day

1030-7.5 remeron @Altostrata

Edited October 30, 2018 by Altostrata
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[Altostrata]

What did you do with the 12.5mg Lamictal? What happened after you took it?

[Allreadygone]

No real difference,I’m really having a bad day my mind is thinking about death last 4 hrs waiting for it to pass @Altostrata

[Altostrata]

You've got to put the 12.5mg Lamictal in your daily notes. I need to know what happens before and after you take each of your drugs.

 

What time of day did your "mind" start thinking about death?

 

Please make this easier on me. You know I want to know when you take your drugs and when you get specific symptoms. You're making me ask over and over.

 

Read all of these carefully:

 

Neuro-emotions

 

Non-drug techniques to cope with emotional symptoms

 

Deep emotional pain and crying spells, spontaneous weeping

 

Health anxiety, hypochondria, and obsession with symptoms

 

Dealing With Emotional Spirals

 

For those who are feeling desperate or suicidal

 

Those are just thoughts, if you ignore them, they will go away. You need to get in touch with your "mind" and change the channel.

[Allreadygone]

I’m sorry my head is in bad space rn when I wrote notes.12.5 lamictal was at 645 yesterday an hour after the other meds.I never really feel anything sudden from meds.only the remeron At night makes my hungry so I can eat Lil and fall asleep.Im tryin my best to last every moment and use tools @Altostrata

[Altostrata]

How many days have you been taking 12.5mg Lamictal at 6:45 a.m.?

 

You know I'm very concerned about that 12.5mg Lamictal, is there some reason you don't want to talk about it?

[Allreadygone]

Not at all,mon was 645 today 745 @Altostratai reached out to u after much research and I know u know this disease

[Altostrata]

Please be sure to keep good notes for today and post them here.

[Allreadygone]

10/30/18(1am-woke on couch went upstairs to bed

1-5 slept no good sleep)(stressed about the day as I have training,Natural doc appt,practice all of which is impossible in my condition.

545-31.25mgs Effexor,25mgs lamictal,5mgs linsinopril,dreading being awake

630-work start,Dark depression,anxiety,severe Depersonalization,tight knot in stomach

745-12.5 lamictal Ive never notice effects of morning drugs After taken

8-12 safety training,symtoms ramping up as very stressful to have to sit when in so much emotional pain around my coworkers I try to stay away from them as much as possible.

12-3,forced clam chowder down.finish work,intrusive thoughts  of wanting to die very strong,knot in stomach strong all symtoms heavy.

345-430 ran at gym usually I don’t hsve the darkest thiughts during workouts but today couldn’t shake em.

5-630 scared to go to new doc but went anyway,all symtoms bad.Met the doc Michael very easy to talk too.I spilled my situation to him and he was very open to listen.Showed me how to massage Vegal neve in mouth by tonsils.Did some magnets as well.Gave me Dhea/Phosphatidylcholine as well as magnesium along with essential oils.He said he would help me to calm flight of fight response.(I’m skeptical but we ll see)7-8 football practice no clue how I made it thru,2 weeks left and it’s over.All it is stress rn in my state.

8-930 talked with wife she is very scared as she knows I never complain about my situation.You and her are the only 2 that know the depths of this.Usually I can sit,watch tv and eat a lil but tonite after the last few days I’ve had I’m not able

1030-took remeron writhing my post,sorry so long . @Altostrata

Edited October 31, 2018 by Altostrata
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[Altostrata]

Please move 12.5mg Lamictal an hour later EVERY DAY until you are taking it about 6 p.m. Post your drug and symptom notes every day.

 

I am seeing you doing a lot of worrying and making yourself sick. Was this tendency to worry why you went on antidepressants in the first place?

 

Cognitive Behavior Therapy and other non-drug treatments can help you change these self-harming habits of mind. I strongly recommend you see coaching from a psychotherapist or other counselor.

 

Read this Non-drug techniques to cope with emotional symptoms

[Allreadygone]

I will keep moving lamictal I’m up to 8today.I was put on ADs for depression from Depersonalization.Was constantly worried about football being starter and playin at high level for a coach that didn’t like me,I was drinking and smoking pot self medicating.Ive been thru years of counseling and learned a lot but thoughts of death are scary I can’t control them or intrusive thoughts but I do try. @Altostrata

[Altostrata]

Allready, you need to see a face-to-face counselor. Try cognitive behavior therapy. We can't supply that kind of therapy here.

 

Much of what you're reporting as symptoms is self-generated anxiety arising from your habits of mind. If you are dedicated to making yourself feel bad, you will get your wish. When you go off drugs, you still need to deal with this kind of thing, or you'll be right back at the doctor's office asking for more pills.

 

Many people do better with fish oil and magnesium supplements, see

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/36-king-of-supplements-omega-3-fatty-acids-fish-oil/
http://survivingantidepressants.org/topic/15483-magnesium-natures-calcium-channel-blocker/

 

A lot of people find them helpful. Try a little bit of one at a time to see how it affects you.

[Allreadygone]

Ok,I have been in CBt class as well,I have been on fish oil fir yrs it has been fine. I understand u can’t counsel people,I know uknow wds and meds and Ive read ur great post.This isn’t my regular depression,anxiety,Dp this has to be chemical as it was last time I was in this state.Thx for tryin to help me @AltostrataI ll just study the post from others and try to make it.

[Allreadygone]

I do really need u to help guide me if you are ok with it,I will keep my feelings off only meds amd symtoms pls @Altostrata

[Allreadygone]

1030-took remeron 7.5mgs

3am-woke up on couch went upstairs to bed

4am Up tried to read listen to soothing music

545-25mgs lamictal,31.25/Symtoms all present ,5mgs linsinopril

646-ate banana

630-12/work/ ate soup forced for lunch no appetite

845-12.5 lamictal

1230-3 finish work very violent death stuff that I can’t control most of day accompanied by Depersonalization,depression,anxiety,paranoia,knot in stomach,overall sick feeling,music bad,food bad,talking bad

3-4 talked with wife about situation

430-630 ran,walked,weights,symtoms bad until walking outside about 715 not wanting to be gone as much.

730-845 sat on hill by house reading an Akathisia site and SA.

9-1030 forced Lil food took 7.5 remeron.

Edited November 1, 2018 by Altostrata
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