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les625: help with Trintellix ... and overall hope

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les625

Hi guys, sorry this may be a long post, I think it is okay to share my story on this.

 

  I am 21 years old, a college student about to graduate, and I have been on an SSRI for about 5 years now.  I was diagnosed with ADHD and GAD when I was about 12, I have always been somewhat anxious and had issues with regulating my emotions.  In 2013 my girlfriend broke up with me and I was really sad and feeling hopeless.  After a few months of being down and also anxious, my doctor (pediatrician) decided to put me on 5mg of Lexapro.  The Lexapro seemed to help (I think?) and I recovered somewhat quickly.  Over the next few years, however, my doctor fluctuated my dosage quite a bit.  I would get anxious, he would up my dosage, and then I would become a zombie and he would lower it.  It did seem to blunt my emotions on a high dose.  Other than that it was fine.  However, the summer after my freshman college, I became extremely anxious and had an existential crisis, prompting my doctor to change me over to Zoloft and Trazodone.

 

  When starting Zoloft, I took 50mg and worked up to 100mg.  It possibly helped my anxiety but my emotions became blunted again (or maybe it was depression?).  I did not feel hopeless or sad, but I kind of lost the ability to have pleasure over simple things.  After going through a hard time on Zoloft and Trazodone feeling empty and dull, my doctor and I decided to taper off to see if that would help.  Every time I tapered, we would allow three weeks to go by to see if it helped.  I went from 100mg to 75mg to 50mg to 25mg and eventually to nothing.  Every time I lowered, I felt a little more in touch with my emotions.  With the Trazodone, I stopped cold turkey on a dose of 50mg.  When I went completely off of the Zoloft and Trazodone, I started having crying episodes, brain zaps, insomnia, anxiety, occasional anhedonia/brain fog, and severe social anxiety.  After a month or two, all of these symptoms went completely away (except sometimes the anhedonia/brain fog).  I was doing good and feeling very in touch with my emotions.

 

  After a few months off of the Zoloft though, the school year was coming back around, and the girl I had been dating for 2 years broke up with me unexpectedly.  It devastated me and left me feeling sad and hopeless.  I was crying all of the time, I was thinking about her all of the time, losing the ability to feel pleasure, and had anxiety because I still saw her every day.  This continued on through the semester and I went home for winter break feeling depressed and anxious.  I was feeling brain fog/anhedonia, and lost overall enthusiasm for life.  It got bad enough that I knew I needed help, so I started talking to a therapist (I had seen a few before this one) and it was helping.  I still was depressed, but was slowly improving.  I started taking Adderall again to study for a certification exam over the break and this helped boost my mood tremendously.  It cleared my mind, helped with the brain fog/anhedonia, and made me feel a little more peaceful inside (less racing thoughts).  My psychiatrist decided he wanted me to take Trintellix and put me on a 5mg dose.

 

  I went back to school feeling down and anhedonic again.  All the progress I made during seemed to start disappearing.  I stopped taking the Adderall, and once the Trintellix seemed to start working I started becoming extremely anxious.  I felt extreme depersonalization, started having weird sensory problems (visual snow, eye floaters, tinnitus, and my body started fluctuating between feeling tingly and numb) and was scared.  My doctor upped my dose of Trintellix to see if that would help. I ended up taking Ativan to help with the anxiety.  I was feeling less anxious but still had the sensory/depersonalization problems.  Not to mention, my emotions went away again.  The Ativan lowered my anxiety but made me feel completely dull and emotionless.  I ended up tapering off of it and feeling better after a few months, but having a lot more anxiety/sensory issues.

 

  Since this (which was earlier in the summer), I started taking Adderall because I read a lot and it seemed my problems were kind of related to Adult ADHD.  I always feel internally restless and have a hard time focusing, and taking therapeutic doses (20 mg or lower) seem to calm me down and clear my mind.  Not to mention, it helps with my emotional regulation problem.  Overall my academics and state of mind are improving.  I have lowered the Trintellix from 20mg to 10mg over two months.  I have had more sensory problems and anxiety since lowering the medicine, but it seems my emotions are slowly coming back.  Every now and then, I get a nostalgic feeling that reminds me of what life used to feel like.  It gives me hope.  But I have been so up and down for the past 5 years, I am sick of feeling so unstable.  I want to have emotions again and not deal with brain fog/anhedonia and anxiety for the rest of my life.  I didn't have the former problem until taking medicine.  I want the sensory problems to be gone.  They only started after I started taking Trintellix. 

 

I need help with tapering off I think.  Does anyone have any advice for me? I want to learn to treat my depression and anxiety in natural ways, and learn to regulate my emotions better.  I want to believe I can live without taking medicine for these issues, because they only seem to exacerbate them.  Do I have any hope of being stable again?  I always feel uneasy inside and am constantly trying to distract my mind from this.  I am sick of being anxious about these weird symptoms, everyone thinks I am crazy and writes me off.  Will slowly tapering help this?  I long for a day that I am not constantly thinking about being better, and can handle life's ups and downs.  I am not wanting to be perfect, just to be able to not always think and worry about my mental health.  I am always worrying about exercising enough, meditating enough, sleeping enough, eating well enough, and lowering stress enough.  I think my issues could be related to tons of different things, but it is so hard to tell when you are put on medicines that only seem to compound the issue.  School has been a big source of stress/anxiety and I am almost done, so I really want to take the time to improve my physical/mental/emotional/spiritual state of mind so life is not always this rocky.  

 

  Thanks for listening, sorry this was so long.

 

Edited by ChessieCat
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les625

Also just to clarify, I am feeling better now than I have in a while.  I am not having the worst anxiety/depression that I have had before, but it is pretty moderate.

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Altostrata

Welcome, les.

 

How's your sleep? Do your symptoms follow any daily pattern?  Please keep daily notes on paper about your symptoms, when you take your drugs, and their dosages. Use a simple list format with time of day on the left and notation (symptom, drug and dosage) on the right.

 

How often do you take Adderall?

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les625

My sleep is okay. It is sometimes disturbed, especially when stressed.  Like waking up early in the morning.  The symptoms I get most right now are fluctuating periods of anxiety and then brain fog.  Also, ever since taking Trintellix I have had visual snow/eye floaters/increased tinnitus.  I also have experienced more depersonalization/derealization.  This has increased since coming off of 1mg of Ativan in July.  I have been taking Adderall daily.  I have done this before a few years ago without any issues.  The Adderall has actually helped calm my anxiety and brain fog, but I have cyclical stages of anxiety/obsessive thoughts. 

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les625

  I am currently on 20 mg of Adderall XR and 10 mg of Trintellix.  I have been on a steady dose of both for 4 months and think I am ready to try to go down in both. Does any have any suggestions? I have no idea which to taper first.  I am so sick of the brain fog I want to taper the antidepressant first, but I am not sure what interactions may occur.  Could I get serotonin syndrome with this? I see that both inhibit CYP2D6, which increases each others' side effects and increases risk of serotonin syndrome.  I'd really appreciate some advice, because my psychiatrist doesn't know much about it, and is not much of a help at all.  I am just ready to do this the right way and feel emotions/motivation again.

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les625

Also, tapering from Trintellix 15 to 10 mg in August really was not bad. I did not have much of an issue with it.

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Altostrata

Hi, les. What times of day do you take your drugs, and their dosages? Are your symptoms better or worse at any times of day? When you reduced the Trintellix, which symptoms changed?

 

Please keep daily notes on paper about your symptoms, when you take your drugs, and their dosages.

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les625

  I take my drugs and supplements in the morning. 10mg of Trintellix and 20 mg of Adderall XR.  I do not take another tablet of Adderall later in the day (I did for a while).  My symptoms are worse when I do not eat breakfast or take the medicine late (without the Adderall I have pretty severe brain fog).  Honestly brain fog is probably the worst symptom right now, along with emotional numbing/apathy.  I also experience fatigue around 2-3 PM and I feel more down around 8-9 (when I notice my Adderall wears off). 

 

  When I reduced the trintellix, I experienced some increased symptoms of anxiety/nervousness the first few days.  I also experienced IBS.  However, the emotional numbing/apathy and brain fog have lowered with each dose.  I truly do feel that the Trintellix is sedating me.  I am a neuroscience student and I can definitely tell the increased SSRI messes with my already depleted dopamine (which I think is depleted for a myriad of reasons).  

 

  Honestly the Adderall has been a game changer for me, however I would like to not be on it the rest of my life.  It gives me the motivation and mental clarity I have not felt in so long.  It does not make me super strung out or jittery.  It makes me feel more normal and motivated again.  But I think there are issues I can deal with to be able to go off of it eventually.  Do you think I could reduce Trintellix and keep Adderall the same at least for now?

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les625

Hey guys,

  I was just wondering if any of you feel that the ADs caused your emotional numbness.  I have been on them since I was 15 (I had a breakup that left me pretty down and sad).  Ever since then, my emotions have been slowly fading away.  I feel very flat and numb.  Happiness and sadness are not ever really present in my life.  I have become less interactive with the world.  Well last year, I went on a fast taper from 50mg of Zoloft to none in three weeks.  I also stopped a 50mg dose of Trazodone CT. I definitely had rough withdrawal symptoms, but over time I started to feel emotions again. Basically, a girl I loved broke up with me after 2 years and it completely broke my heart during this time.  But I started to feel again.  My emotions were unpredictable and I did not realize withdrawal could last months, so my doctor put me on another medicine.  The feelings started to slowly fade away again...

  I have always thought that becoming older my emotions just kind of disappear.  I am 21 now.  I miss feeling things.  I feel that I have lost all empathy and passion for life.  Do you lose passion when you get older? I would like to hear from some of the older folks.  Does emotion ever come back? This is my normal and I do not like it.  I want to find a sense of identity.  Life feels pretty hollow and grey.  How long did it take you guys after coming off to get emotion again? I started taking Adderall which helped with my apathy and amotivation, but did not help with my lack of emotions.

  Do you experience emotions later in life? I miss the feelings that came from a hug, spending time with friends, family, finding meaning in my relationship with God.  All just feels bleh. I miss passion and hope, excitement and sadness.  Any type of encouragement about finding passion/emotion/purpose/identity would be nice.

 

Thank you guys for all you do

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ChessieCat

There are many existing topics on this site.  Before creating a new topic, please use the site search or google adding survivingantidepressants.org to the search term.

 

emotional-numbness-on-and-off-drugs

 

anhedonia-apathy-demotivation-emotional-numbness

 

derealization-or-depersonalization-dr-and-dp    (continue reading more than the first few posts)

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PapayaShake

Hi les👋

 

Im currently experiencing emotional numbness I stopped having romantic feelings for my girlfriend. I also get no pleasure from anything pretty much anything. Any of my hobbies or anything I used to do. I was olny 8 months full dose on antidepressants and then its been 2 years tappering. This seems to be a common symptom from antidepressant usage.

In the success stories thread there are some people who reported being numb and then went back to feeling and enjoying the things they used to do. It took some years after quitting completely for them to regain their feelings, and was one of the last things to come back.

I personally can't say how it happens because Im like this too but if you search through the success stories there are some who have written about anhedonia and emotional numbness recovery. 

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les625
27 minutes ago, PapayaShake said:

Hi les👋

 

Im currently experiencing emotional numbness I stopped having romantic feelings for my girlfriend. I also get no pleasure from anything pretty much anything. Any of my hobbies or anything I used to do. I was olny 8 months full dose on antidepressants and then its been 2 years tappering. This seems to be a common symptom from antidepressant usage.

In the success stories thread there are some people who reported being numb and then went back to feeling and enjoying the things they used to do. It took some years after quitting completely for them to regain their feelings, and was one of the last things to come back.

I personally can't say how it happens because Im like this too but if you search through the success stories there are some who have written about anhedonia and emotional numbness recovery. 

Thanks for replying.  I have improved a lot; I have tapered from 10 mg in august down to 5 mg now.  Been on 5 mg for a little bit of time, had some moderate withdrawal symptoms.  However, I am getting moments of emotion coming back and I can directly correlate it to lower my dosage of Trintellix.  I am hopeful.  Doing a lot of other things to help try to recover my brain.  I appreciate the advice and encouragement.

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Carmie

Hi les, 

 

Yes anhedonia ( emotional numbness ) is certainly something a lot of us go through. Mine isn’t there all the time, but when I’m in waves I can be totally numb and not enjoy anything much at all. It doesn’t stop me from doing things though, as I still find doing things that I would normally enjoy if I wasn’t anhedonic a good distraction nevertheless.

 

I remember being down the Coast at my sister’s place once, I was so extremely numb but I still made myself go down to the beach and hop on the tram and explore. 

 

I remember when one bout of anhedonia lifted a little and I could actually enjoy some beautiful yellow flowers. The camera came came out. Snap! Snap! Snap! 

 

Take care, sending hugs🤗

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les625

Hey guys,

  I was just wondering for those that recovered, how long did it take you to recover emotions? I have done a taper from Trintellix after being on different SSRIs for 6 years.  My emotions slowly disappeared, and reappeared sometimes during the taper.  Now that I am completely off the medication, my emotions have slowly gone away again.  Along with this, my libido. Interestingly enough, the anxiety disappeared and now it's just been onn and off lack of emotions.

 

 

  The only symptoms I have been dealing with for a while have been brain fog, mild DP/DR, mild anhedonia, lack of emotions, and lack of focus.  I am also still on Adderall so I don't know how much that affects my emotions.  It is hard to tell how long this withdrawal will be, my tapers were usually only a month or two of symptoms.  Praying that it will not last years.

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les625

Topic title:  Should I reinstate?  Deciding when to.

 

Hello,

  I have been gradually tapering off of my Trintellix for about a year now.  In July 2018, I went from 20 to 15 mg.  I had withdrawal reactions for about a month, and then stabilized.  Later in August, I went from 15 to 10 mg, had withdrawal reactions for about a month, then stabilized.  That December, I went from 10 mg to 5 mg, and stabilized after a month.  In February, I went from 5 mg to none.  I have been off two weeks.  This withdrawal has been worse, but not awful.  I am feeling lethargy/brain fog/diminished libido/slight anhedonia/gastrointestinal upset.  All in all, it isn't awful.  I am still in college about to graduate in a few months.  However, I am worried that if I do not reinstate my withdrawal may last longer than otherwise.  Should I reinstate if I am not doing that bad?  I just have seen so many horror stories and see how gradually people are tapering, I am nervous that it may last way longer.  Overall, I feel okay though.  I do not have enough money (being a broke college student) to do compounding pharmacy, and trintellix is coated and not scored.  Could anyone help me with discerning what to do? Thank you all for what you do here, it is amazing.'

 

Edited by ChessieCat
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les625
1 hour ago, Altostrata said:

Welcome, les.

 

How have your symptoms changed in the last month? How are you sleeping?

 

You have to decide how bad you feel. If I were you, I'd reinstate 2.5mg Trintellix, stabilize, and taper off later.  See Tips for tapering off Trintellix (vortioxetine), previously called Brintellix

The brain fog has improved somewhat after going off the medication interestingly. I definitely don’t feel awful, the diminished libido and lethargy has definitely increased some. Honestly, the symptoms are only at a 5-6. I know that trintellix takes between 12-14 days to leave the system usually, so maybe this is the worst of it. We will see. I am trying to decide. Do you think it’s okay to split the pills even though they are time-released? I am sleeping good right now actually. Sleeping a lot. I feel like I need a lot. Thank you for all you do alto, this website has been such a blessing and helped me regain control of my life. Thanks for your help!

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les625
1 hour ago, Altostrata said:

Welcome, les.

 

How have your symptoms changed in the last month? How are you sleeping?

 

You have to decide how bad you feel. If I were you, I'd reinstate 2.5mg Trintellix, stabilize, and taper off later.  See Tips for tapering off Trintellix (vortioxetine), previously called Brintellix

The brain fog has improved somewhat after going off the medication interestingly. I definitely don’t feel awful, the diminished libido and lethargy has definitely increased some. Honestly, the symptoms are only at a 5-6. I know that trintellix takes between 12-14 days to leave the system usually, so maybe this is the worst of it. We will see. I am trying to decide. Do you think it’s okay to split the pills even though they are time-released? I am sleeping good right now actually. Sleeping a lot. I feel like I need a lot. Thank you for all you do alto, this website has been such a blessing and helped me regain control of my life. Thanks for your help!

 

also, could I try sticking it out? I don’t know at what point I shouldn’t and reinstate. My symptoms are only moderate; they are definitely manageable. I just don’t want to mess this up.

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ChessieCat

Hi les,

 

I've merged the new topic you created with your original Introduction topic.  This keeps your history in one place.  Each member has only 1 Introduction topic where they can ask questions about their own situation and journal their progress.  Please continue to post here in your Introduction topic.

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les625
Posted (edited)

Topic title:  To Reinstate or not?

 

Hello,

  I have been off of Trintellix for 2.75 months.  I experienced some anxiety and physical/neurological symptoms at first, but they were mild and disappeared around 1 month in.  I have been completely fine, slowly improving over the past 2.5 months or so.  However, I was just hit a few days ago with bad panic, and have been very anxious and had many almost-panic attacks the past few days. I honestly think part of it was living in fear that I might be stuck in withdrawal for years (after reading this website).  I was doing fine and it all just kind of hit me (also right as I am graduating college).  I tapered over 8 months, and am wondering if I should reinstate.  My only symptoms right now are: anxiety/panic, and fear I will never get better.  My depression/Anhedonia/everything else is okay right now. I just am being hit with physical and emotional symptoms of anxiety.  It’s only been 4 days feeling this way though. I would appreciate any advice I could get, if I should wait it out or reinstate. I just want hope and to be rid of these medications forever. (P.S. I came off 5 mg of adderall about 3 weeks ago).

Edited by ChessieCat
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les625

It is hard for me to tell if it is: coming off adderall, the fear of graduating from college, or trintellix withdrawal

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les625

Can someone please help me?

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ChessieCat
On 2/24/2019 at 1:13 PM, ChessieCat said:

Hi les,

 

I've merged the new topic you created with your original Introduction topic.  This keeps your history in one place.  Each member has only 1 Introduction topic where they can ask questions about their own situation and journal their progress.  Please continue to post here in your Introduction topic. 

 

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ChessieCat
On 4/24/2019 at 6:18 AM, les625 said:

I tapered over 8 months, and am wondering if I should reinstate.  My only symptoms right now are: anxiety/panic, and fear I will never get better.  My depression/Anhedonia/everything else is okay right now. I just am being hit with physical and emotional symptoms of anxiety.  It’s only been 4 days feeling this way though. I would appreciate any advice I could get, if I should wait it out or reinstate. I just want hope and to be rid of these medications forever. (P.S. I came off 5 mg of adderall about 3 weeks ago).

 

Hi les,

 

Please provide 3 days of daily symptoms notes so that your situation can be assessed.  This is an example of what is needed:

 

6 a.m. Woke with anxiety
8 a.m. Took 2.5mg Lexapro
10 a.m. Stomach is upset
10:30 a.m. Ate breakfast
11:35 a.m. Got a headache, lasted one hour
12:35 p.m. Ate lunch
4 p.m. Feel a bit better
5 p.m. Took 2.5mg Lexapro
6 p.m. Ate dinner
9:20 p.m. Headache
10:00 p.m. Took 50mg Seroquel
10:20 p.m. Feeling dizzy
10:30 p.m. Fell asleep
2:30 a.m. Woke, took 3mg Ambien (NOT "took 1/2 tablet Ambien")
2:45 a.m. Fell asleep
4:30 a.m. Woke but got back to sleep

 

 

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les625
59 minutes ago, ChessieCat said:

 

Hi les,

 

Please provide 3 days of daily symptoms notes so that your situation can be assessed.  This is an example of what is needed:

 

6 a.m. Woke with anxiety
8 a.m. Took 2.5mg Lexapro
10 a.m. Stomach is upset
10:30 a.m. Ate breakfast
11:35 a.m. Got a headache, lasted one hour
12:35 p.m. Ate lunch
4 p.m. Feel a bit better
5 p.m. Took 2.5mg Lexapro
6 p.m. Ate dinner
9:20 p.m. Headache
10:00 p.m. Took 50mg Seroquel
10:20 p.m. Feeling dizzy
10:30 p.m. Fell asleep
2:30 a.m. Woke, took 3mg Ambien (NOT "took 1/2 tablet Ambien")
2:45 a.m. Fell asleep
4:30 a.m. Woke but got back to sleep

 

 

Yesterday:

9 a.m. woke up with anxiety (take 100 mg magnesium and fish oil)

11 a.m. anxiety disappears when going on a walk/2 mike run

1 p.m. anxiety returns (take 100 mg magnesium)

3 p.m. take a nap and wake up with lots of anxiety

5 p.m. anxiety disappears when I go out to eat with my girlfriend, stays gone for the rest of the night (take 100 mg magnesium)

11 p.m. fell asleep, slept through whole night (took 100 mg magnesium)

 

 

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les625

Yesterday: 4/24

8 a.m. woke up with heart racing and anxiety because I still feel anxious (take fish oil & magnesium)

10 a.m. ruminating thoughts, cannot get anxiety out of my head, it intensifies

12 p.m. went on a walk, alleviated all anxiety for a few minutes

12:30 p.m. anxiety returns, panicked about it returning

1:30 p.m. went out to school event, felt dp/dr because I was so anxious 

3 p.m. took nap and fell asleep without any anxiety, woke up with tight chest again

5 p.m. went to get dinner & hang with girlfriend. Listened to Claire Weekes and felt relief. Anxiety did not come back all night.

12 a.m. fell asleep, slept through all of the night

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les625

I came off adderall 4 weeks ago, i came off Trintellix 2.75 months ago, I’m 28 days into stopping a porn/masturbation addiction, and I’m graduating in a week from college. I am going home and leaving all my friends behind, and my girlfriend is moving and we will be doing long distance.  The fact that my only symptom is really panic/anxiety makes me think this might be situational even if it doesn’t feel like it. I am in the middle of finals too and am anxious I won’t be able to finish them.  I know my mind wants to go to the worst conclusion that I am in withdrawal and will be stuck this way for years. So idk what to do.

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Altostrata
On 4/23/2019 at 1:18 PM, les625 said:

My only symptoms right now are: anxiety/panic, and fear I will never get better.  My depression/Anhedonia/everything else is okay right now. I just am being hit with physical and emotional symptoms of anxiety.  It’s only been 4 days feeling this way though. I would appreciate any advice I could get, if I should wait it out or reinstate. I just want hope and to be rid of these medications forever. (P.S. I came off 5 mg of adderall about 3 weeks ago).

 

les, Adderall can also incur dependency leading to withdrawal symptoms. How did you come off Adderall?

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les625
34 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

 

les, Adderall can also incur dependency leading to withdrawal symptoms. How did you come off Adderall?

I came off Adderall like this:

 

20 mg XR -> 10 mg IR (January) - No problems at all, maybe some brain fog and tiredness

10 mg IR -> 5 mg IR (March) - Some anxiety, mood swings, brain fog, fatigue after a week off.  Lasted two weeks at most.

5 mg IR -> None (April) - No symptoms for two weeks, then Panic/Anxiety set in.  I have been panicky and anxious for 4 and a half days now. Taking prescribed ativan (1 mg a day) to help with panic attacks.  No other noticeable symptoms besides panic/anxiety, not even depression.  Overall I feel cognitively good and energetic, but full of so much anxiety it is unbearable without the ativan.  It is hard to leave my room.  Interestingly, the panic/anxiety completely subsides by nighttime.

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les625
34 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

 

les, Adderall can also incur dependency leading to withdrawal symptoms. How did you come off Adderall?

I came off Adderall like this:

 

20 mg XR -> 10 mg IR (January) - No problems at all, maybe some brain fog and tiredness

10 mg IR -> 5 mg IR (March) - Some anxiety, mood swings, brain fog, fatigue after a week off.  Lasted two weeks at most.

5 mg IR -> None (April) - No symptoms for two weeks, then Panic/Anxiety set in.  I have been panicky and anxious for 4 and a half days now. Taking prescribed ativan (1 mg a day) to help with panic attacks.  No other noticeable symptoms besides panic/anxiety, not even depression.  Overall I feel cognitively good and energetic, but full of so much anxiety it is unbearable without the ativan.

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les625

Alto,  could Adderall cause withdrawal 2 weeks out? The first two weeks were completely fine, and it seems that withdrawal starts after a few days.

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les625
On 4/24/2019 at 8:10 PM, les625 said:

Yesterday:

9 a.m. woke up with anxiety (take 100 mg magnesium and fish oil)

11 a.m. anxiety disappears when going on a walk/2 mike run

1 p.m. anxiety returns (take 100 mg magnesium)

3 p.m. take a nap and wake up with lots of anxiety

5 p.m. anxiety disappears when I go out to eat with my girlfriend, stays gone for the rest of the night (take 100 mg magnesium)

11 p.m. fell asleep, slept through whole night (took 100 mg magnesium)

 

4/24

8 a.m. woke up with heart racing and anxiety because I still feel anxious (take 100 mg magnesium and fish oil)

10 a.m. ruminating thoughts, cannot get out of bed because of anxiety, it intensifies

12 p.m. went on walk, alleviates all anxiety

12:30 p.m. anxiety returns, panicked about it returning

1:30 p.m. went to school event, felt dp/dr because I was so anxious

3 p.m. took nap, anxiety came back intensely (chest tight, sweating, heart rate increase)

5 p.m. went to get dinner, hung with girlfriend, listened to Claire Weekes and felt relief, anxiety did not return at all that night.

12 a.m. fell asleep, did not wake up in the middle of the night

 

4/25

8 a.m. woke up with heart racing and anxiety (took 100 mg magnesium and fish oil)

10 a.m. anxiety better, still pretty anxious

11 a.m. took 1 mg ativan to help, anxiety disappeared

1 p.m. hung with girlfriend (took 100 mg magnesium)

4 p.m. anxiety came back, panicked about it never getting better

5 p.m. took 1 mg ativan, anxiety disappeared for the rest of the night.

12 a.m. fell asleep, did not wake up in the middle of the night

 

4/26

8 a.m. woke up with anxiety, not as bad as other mornings

11 a.m. took final, very anxious

12 p.m. finished final, felt less anxious

1 p.m. feeling more hopeful, not quite as anxious, about to go on a run

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