Hellbutrin Posted December 30, 2017 Share Posted December 30, 2017 3 hours ago, DaisyBell said: Hi Hellbutin, I don't have the answer to your questions, but I recommend you check out the thread on Depersonalisation and derealisation that is on this site. It is comprehensive and may shed some light on your situation. I do know that DP/DR for some people appears after cessation of a AD as a withdrawal symptom. It can continue for months or years. Everyone heals differently. It does eventually go away. I've had it for over three years, but it has slowly diminished in intensity. I find staying away from stimulus (fluorescent light, noise, and busy places, or where I have to move a lot etc) the best way to manage it. Hi DaisyBell, Thanks so much for the feedback. Does your DP/DR come and go in a windows and waves pattern, or have you had DP/DR constantly for three years? Has your brain fog and anhedonia improved at all in the time since you've withdrawn? I can't bear to think that I will have consistent symptoms that are as severe as the ones that I've been experiencing for another three years. Started Wellbutrin 75 mg IR the end of 2015. Tried quitting cold turkey in June 30th- July 3rd 2017. Had severe withdrawals. Was placed on Wellbutrin 100mg SR so I could taper without withdrawal. Stabilized on 100mg SR for most of the month of July. Started tapering on July 17th, 2017. Completed taper on August 8th, 2017. Currently experiencing severe withdrawal. Symptoms- Currently experiencing anhedonia, depersonalization/derealization, concentration/memory issues, chronic congestion, chronic dry eyes, dry skin, dislocated TMJ joint from teeth grinding during C/T withdrawal, waves of depression, anxiety, nausea, morning cortisol spikes, insomnia, agitation, food sensitivities, no tolerance for caffeine and chronic fatigue, burning muscle pain in upper and lower back and occasional tinninitus. Supplements- Omega-3 fish oil supplement twice daily, 100 mg of magnesium once daily. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hellbutrin Posted December 30, 2017 Share Posted December 30, 2017 2 hours ago, Shep said: From the article - The Atlantic - Enlightenment's Evil Twin There's a lot that psychologists still don't understand about depersonalization disorder, in which the self doesn't feel real: Research suggests that areas of the brain that are key to emotional and physical sensations, such as the amygdala and the insula, appear to be less responsive in chronic depersonalization sufferers. You might become less empathetic; your pain threshold might increase. These numbing effects mean that it’s commonly conceived as a defense mechanism; Hunter calls it a “psychological trip switch” which can be triggered in times of stress. From The Ashton Manual - Ashton Manual - symptoms Depersonalisation, derealisation. Feelings of depersonalisation and of unreality are associated with benzodiazepine withdrawal, although they also occur in anxiety states. They occur most often during over-rapid withdrawal from potent benzodiazepines and are, anecdotally, particularly marked on withdrawal from clonazepam (Klonopin). In these states, the person seems detached from his body and seems almost to be observing it from the outside. Similar experiences are described in near-death states when the individual feels that he is hovering above his body, detached from the events occurring below. They are also described by people involved in extreme emergencies and in individuals subjected to torture. They are clearly not specific to benzodiazepines. Such experiences probably represent a normal defensive reaction evolved as a protection against intolerable suffering. They may involve a primitive brain mechanism similar to the "freezing" of some animals when presented with an inescapable danger. Like other benzodiazepine withdrawal symptoms, these feelings resolve in time and should not be interpreted as abnormal or crazy. I do believe it's a combination of damage to the amygdala, which is the fear center of the brain, as well as memory problems such as anterograde amnesia and also, many people coming off these drugs experience dyschronometria, which is a distorted perception of time. Definitely check out the SA thread on dp/dr: Derealization and depersonalization Hi Shep, Thanks for the feedback. I was wondering if you have come across any information about the pattern of healing that is exhibited with DP/DR. Does DP/DR break up into windows and waves when we start healing or does it remain constant and slowly dissipate as we heal? Or is it totally up to the individual? I've been totally withdrawal from my medication for 5 months and I haven't seen any improvement in my DP/DR. I know that the excerpt that you quoted mentioned that this is a common ordeal, but how common is it for this symptom to remain constant for years? Started Wellbutrin 75 mg IR the end of 2015. Tried quitting cold turkey in June 30th- July 3rd 2017. Had severe withdrawals. Was placed on Wellbutrin 100mg SR so I could taper without withdrawal. Stabilized on 100mg SR for most of the month of July. Started tapering on July 17th, 2017. Completed taper on August 8th, 2017. Currently experiencing severe withdrawal. Symptoms- Currently experiencing anhedonia, depersonalization/derealization, concentration/memory issues, chronic congestion, chronic dry eyes, dry skin, dislocated TMJ joint from teeth grinding during C/T withdrawal, waves of depression, anxiety, nausea, morning cortisol spikes, insomnia, agitation, food sensitivities, no tolerance for caffeine and chronic fatigue, burning muscle pain in upper and lower back and occasional tinninitus. Supplements- Omega-3 fish oil supplement twice daily, 100 mg of magnesium once daily. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Emeritus Petunia Posted December 30, 2017 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted December 30, 2017 2 hours ago, Hellbutrin said: .... how common is it for this symptom to remain constant for years? For me DP/DR has decreased in a windows/waves kind of pattern. But at first it was there consistently, and worse in stimulating or demanding situations and environments. I'm not a doctor. My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one. My Introduction Thread Full Drug and Withdrawal History Brief Summary Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects 2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010 Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal) May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins. Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens. Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days. April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close. VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from? VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made? VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes? VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects? VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DaisyBell Posted December 30, 2017 Share Posted December 30, 2017 4 hours ago, Hellbutrin said: Hi DaisyBell, Thanks so much for the feedback. Does your DP/DR come and go in a windows and waves pattern, or have you had DP/DR constantly for three years? Has your brain fog and anhedonia improved at all in the time since you've withdrawn? I can't bear to think that I will have consistent symptoms that are as severe as the ones that I've been experiencing for another three years. Everyone experiences withdrawal differently. Some symptoms come in waves and windows and some are consistently there but seem to gradually reduce in severity over time. DP/DR has gradually, but consistently improved for me, not in waves/windows. Other people are different. I expect this year (my fourth) to be my last one in withdrawal and with DP/DR. Join in one the conversation on the other thread dedicated to DP/DR. You'll benefit from the others knowledge on there. In Jan 2011 started Lexapro 10 mg after 10 minutes consultation with doctor telling him I felt anxious in confined spaces and had an anxiety attack on plane and underground. Remained on that dosage until Sept 2014. Tapered following a doctor's schedule on 2.5 mg drops every three weeks. Once stopped I developed severe withdrawals. Three weeks of Prozac beginning of Oct 2014 but had adverse reaction and stopped CT. Protracted withdrawals since. Supp now - magnesium, fish oil, turmeric, vit D, melatonin (but recently it's made me depressed), castus vitex capsule with ginger, Withania, Vit E, zinc, Lutein for PMS. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hellbutrin Posted December 30, 2017 Share Posted December 30, 2017 18 hours ago, DaisyBell said: Everyone experiences withdrawal differently. Some symptoms come in waves and windows and some are consistently there but seem to gradually reduce in severity over time. DP/DR has gradually, but consistently improved for me, not in waves/windows. Other people are different. I expect this year (my fourth) to be my last one in withdrawal and with DP/DR. Join in one the conversation on the other thread dedicated to DP/DR. You'll benefit from the others knowledge on there. Thanks so much for the reassurance DaisyBell, did you experience anhedonia when you where in the throws of Dp/DR? Did your anhedonia slowly improve as your Dp/DR improved? I ask because I don't seem to care about anything lately with the exception of withdrawal and anything related to how miserable I feel constantly. Started Wellbutrin 75 mg IR the end of 2015. Tried quitting cold turkey in June 30th- July 3rd 2017. Had severe withdrawals. Was placed on Wellbutrin 100mg SR so I could taper without withdrawal. Stabilized on 100mg SR for most of the month of July. Started tapering on July 17th, 2017. Completed taper on August 8th, 2017. Currently experiencing severe withdrawal. Symptoms- Currently experiencing anhedonia, depersonalization/derealization, concentration/memory issues, chronic congestion, chronic dry eyes, dry skin, dislocated TMJ joint from teeth grinding during C/T withdrawal, waves of depression, anxiety, nausea, morning cortisol spikes, insomnia, agitation, food sensitivities, no tolerance for caffeine and chronic fatigue, burning muscle pain in upper and lower back and occasional tinninitus. Supplements- Omega-3 fish oil supplement twice daily, 100 mg of magnesium once daily. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hellbutrin Posted December 30, 2017 Share Posted December 30, 2017 20 hours ago, Petunia said: For me DP/DR has decreased in a windows/waves kind of pattern. But at first it was there consistently, and worse in stimulating or demanding situations and environments. Hi Petunia, It seems to be the opposite for me. The only time that I'm not thinking about it is when I am doing something to distract my mind from the way that I'm feeling in the present moment. Started Wellbutrin 75 mg IR the end of 2015. Tried quitting cold turkey in June 30th- July 3rd 2017. Had severe withdrawals. Was placed on Wellbutrin 100mg SR so I could taper without withdrawal. Stabilized on 100mg SR for most of the month of July. Started tapering on July 17th, 2017. Completed taper on August 8th, 2017. Currently experiencing severe withdrawal. Symptoms- Currently experiencing anhedonia, depersonalization/derealization, concentration/memory issues, chronic congestion, chronic dry eyes, dry skin, dislocated TMJ joint from teeth grinding during C/T withdrawal, waves of depression, anxiety, nausea, morning cortisol spikes, insomnia, agitation, food sensitivities, no tolerance for caffeine and chronic fatigue, burning muscle pain in upper and lower back and occasional tinninitus. Supplements- Omega-3 fish oil supplement twice daily, 100 mg of magnesium once daily. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DaisyBell Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 I am not sure if I really have experienced Anhedonia. I have felt emotions differently than when I am normal, sometimes they are over exaggerated particularly the negative and sometimes they are not felt as deeply or broadly (with all the sensory experiences you have with each emotion) but not to the extent I've been concerned. Other symptoms seem to have my attention. I wouldn't say there is a connection between DP/DR and Anhedonia. You may heal from from those symptoms at different times. You will heal though. I have a sense that when I do, it will be cathartic and life will taste sweeter than ever before. BTW, it is normal to be overly focused on your situation to the exclusion of other things. This isn't a normal experience. However, being aware of that means you can change "the channel" so to speak. If you can find something that gives you a momentary escape, do that. Maybe play with your senses. Smell a rose. Taste an orange. Touch wool. Have a warm shower. Have a cold shower. Rub your toes against the carpet, feel the texture. Play with playdough...:) Paint a picture.... don't focus on the emotion just the sensation. You will heal. In Jan 2011 started Lexapro 10 mg after 10 minutes consultation with doctor telling him I felt anxious in confined spaces and had an anxiety attack on plane and underground. Remained on that dosage until Sept 2014. Tapered following a doctor's schedule on 2.5 mg drops every three weeks. Once stopped I developed severe withdrawals. Three weeks of Prozac beginning of Oct 2014 but had adverse reaction and stopped CT. Protracted withdrawals since. Supp now - magnesium, fish oil, turmeric, vit D, melatonin (but recently it's made me depressed), castus vitex capsule with ginger, Withania, Vit E, zinc, Lutein for PMS. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SunderedStar Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 I've had DPDR for two years now. It came on gradually over time but got worse when I smoked cannabis. I used to be able to ignore it in 2015 but the more I smoked the worse it became until it was unbearable, I haven't smoked cannabis in a year now and will not smoke ever again. DPDR can take years to recover from. It is usually a long lasting affliction. For a quick temporary way out of it, you can become sleep deprived. It lifts me out of it until I fall back into it upon sleep. But the usual way out is enduring it for a long period of time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hellbutrin Posted January 1, 2018 Share Posted January 1, 2018 4 hours ago, SunderedStar said: I've had DPDR for two years now. It came on gradually over time but got worse when I smoked cannabis. I used to be able to ignore it in 2015 but the more I smoked the worse it became until it was unbearable, I haven't smoked cannabis in a year now and will not smoke ever again. DPDR can take years to recover from. It is usually a long lasting affliction. For a quick temporary way out of it, you can become sleep deprived. It lifts me out of it until I fall back into it upon sleep. But the usual way out is enduring it for a long period of time. Thanks for the advice, but I don't think that depriving my brain of sleep, the main thing that it needs to heal, is conducive to recovering from DP/DR and withdrawal in general. I have chronic insomnia from withdrawal so I'm sure if sleep deprivation was going to be the "temporary way out of it", I would have experienced it by now. If it works for you that's great. Started Wellbutrin 75 mg IR the end of 2015. Tried quitting cold turkey in June 30th- July 3rd 2017. Had severe withdrawals. Was placed on Wellbutrin 100mg SR so I could taper without withdrawal. Stabilized on 100mg SR for most of the month of July. Started tapering on July 17th, 2017. Completed taper on August 8th, 2017. Currently experiencing severe withdrawal. Symptoms- Currently experiencing anhedonia, depersonalization/derealization, concentration/memory issues, chronic congestion, chronic dry eyes, dry skin, dislocated TMJ joint from teeth grinding during C/T withdrawal, waves of depression, anxiety, nausea, morning cortisol spikes, insomnia, agitation, food sensitivities, no tolerance for caffeine and chronic fatigue, burning muscle pain in upper and lower back and occasional tinninitus. Supplements- Omega-3 fish oil supplement twice daily, 100 mg of magnesium once daily. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robcbar1 Posted February 9, 2018 Share Posted February 9, 2018 On 10/18/2017 at 5:50 PM, Blondiee1915 said: Robcbar1 - I am also a lexapro victim and struggle with DP and DR plus dizziness / unsteadiness and fatigue . I basically quit CT after being on for 10 years with some other meds in bw . I sure do hope it will get better . I did reinstate last October then switched to another ssri very little relief Hey Blondiee - Just checking in to see if your DP/DR has gotten any better? Mine waxes and wanes but it's been really bad lately. 21 years of daily SSRI use in total... Paxil 1995-1998 Zoloft (50 mg) 1998-2002 Lexapro (10 mg) 2002-2015 (**August 2015, Lexapro “stopped working" after near death of my 1.5 yr. old son**) Lexapro (15/20 mg) - increasing dose only made SEs worse Nov 2015 - Mar 2016 Zoloft (25/50 mg) - made derealization worse Mar 2016 - Jul 2016 Celexa (20 mg) - made symptoms worse Oct 2016 - Jan 2017 Remeron (7.5 mg) - helped me eat and sleep for 4 nights, then went bad Jan 2018 (stopped after 2 weeks) Lamictal (5.0 mg) - horrific withdrawal Jan 2018 - Oct 2020 TODAY - 100% DRUG FREE (Trialed Prozac, Effexor, Wellbutrin, Cymbalta - severe reaction, couldn't tolerate longer than a few days) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blonde Posted February 9, 2018 Share Posted February 9, 2018 DP is really bad. I quit cold turkey in August 2017 and was recently told that I did extra brain trauma doing that. My daughter and her family that live with me don't understand what I'm going through and I have to try to act normal around them, which is impossible. I stay in my room all the time and I'm going crazy. I feel like screaming and crying at the top of my lungs right now. They do things and leave me out and it hurts me so bad. I don't have anyone. I just retired and went off Prozac and trazadone and this is a living hell. When will it get better. Started Prozac 40 mg April 1, 1989, stopped August 30, 2017. Started Trazadon 150 mg September 1, 1992, stopped August 30, 2017. Started Levothyroxine 100 mg April 2000 stopped August 15, 2017. Started Prilosec February 1998 Stopped January 2017. Started Pantoprazole 40 mg January 2017 stopped August 31, 2017. Started Ranididine 150 mg January 2017 still take it occasionally along with baking soda. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lolitaheb Posted February 9, 2018 Share Posted February 9, 2018 23 minutes ago, Blonde said: DP is really bad. I quit cold turkey in August 2017 and was recently told that I did extra brain trauma doing that. My daughter and her family that live with me don't understand what I'm going through and I have to try to act normal around them, which is impossible. I stay in my room all the time and I'm going crazy. I feel like screaming and crying at the top of my lungs right now. They do things and leave me out and it hurts me so bad. I don't have anyone. I just retired and went off Prozac and trazadone and this is a living hell. When will it get better. Hey blonde, our situation is pretty similar, i quit a medication cold turkey in july 2017 and got DR ever since then 24/7, i have other weird symptoms as well Took 600 mg of trileptal (2 pills) every night and 300 mg (1 pill) in the morning for almost 3 months took 1 mg of risperdal at night and half pill in the morning for 1 month these are the only 2 drugs i've ever taken. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blonde Posted February 10, 2018 Share Posted February 10, 2018 So what can we do to stop this DP...I have to pinch myself to see if I'm real..nothing makes sense... Started Prozac 40 mg April 1, 1989, stopped August 30, 2017. Started Trazadon 150 mg September 1, 1992, stopped August 30, 2017. Started Levothyroxine 100 mg April 2000 stopped August 15, 2017. Started Prilosec February 1998 Stopped January 2017. Started Pantoprazole 40 mg January 2017 stopped August 31, 2017. Started Ranididine 150 mg January 2017 still take it occasionally along with baking soda. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blondiee1915 Posted February 10, 2018 Share Posted February 10, 2018 @robcbar1Hi, unfortunately not much progress for me in the dp/dr department. It is pretty constant for me. I am trying to be accepting and not freak out about this symptom because the more I worry about this the worse it becomes. So I try to rest, eat well, and just ignore it and hope it will pass. I also read that this can be a symptom of constant stress mode/anxiety where your body detaches almost in order to protect itself so I am not sure if my dp/dr is related to that or WD or both. But in any case, since drugs are not an option for my I just continue on. Are you doing anything to help you cope with this? 04/10 Luvox 25 mg PM, Nortriptyline 1 mg PM 03/08/19: Buspar 2.5 mg AM, 5 mg PM 01/01/19: Xanax 0.125 AM 5 times a week. Occasionally, 0.125 twice a day AM & noon 12/18 Armour Thyroid 60 mg (for hypothyroidism) Supplements: B Complex, B12 (adeno), multi-vitamin, D, Adrenal Cortex, iron Lexapro 20 mg 2007 - 2013 with various attempts to stop 2013 found a new Dr and started trying other meds: Prozac, Notryptoline, Effexor, Buspar, Gabapentin, Paxil, Nardil Lexapro 15 mg 2015 - 04/2016 Vibryiid 10 - 15mg 05/16-06/16 NO MEDS 07/16 - 10/31/16 Reinstated 10/31/16 at 2.5 mg lexapro, increased to 5 mg 1/13/17 switched to Luvox 50 mg before bed 1/20/17 Luvox 37.5 mg PM 12/18 Luvox 10 mg PM, Nortriptyline 2 mg (started Nortriptyline 06/17 at 10 mg) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robcbar1 Posted February 10, 2018 Share Posted February 10, 2018 1 hour ago, Blondiee1915 said: @robcbar1Hi, unfortunately not much progress for me in the dp/dr department. It is pretty constant for me. I am trying to be accepting and not freak out about this symptom because the more I worry about this the worse it becomes. So I try to rest, eat well, and just ignore it and hope it will pass. I also read that this can be a symptom of constant stress mode/anxiety where your body detaches almost in order to protect itself so I am not sure if my dp/dr is related to that or WD or both. But in any case, since drugs are not an option for my I just continue on. Are you doing anything to help you cope with this? Hi Blondiee - No progress for me either. If anything it's gotten worse and nothing seems to help me cope. I think mine is a combination of WD and me constantly freaking out over my symptoms associated with WD. Everything I read says to ignore it but I find it virtually impossible to ignore my experience of the world (or lack thereof). I'm at my wits end! I would love to hear from someone who's been where we are and recovered. Best of luck to you my friend. 21 years of daily SSRI use in total... Paxil 1995-1998 Zoloft (50 mg) 1998-2002 Lexapro (10 mg) 2002-2015 (**August 2015, Lexapro “stopped working" after near death of my 1.5 yr. old son**) Lexapro (15/20 mg) - increasing dose only made SEs worse Nov 2015 - Mar 2016 Zoloft (25/50 mg) - made derealization worse Mar 2016 - Jul 2016 Celexa (20 mg) - made symptoms worse Oct 2016 - Jan 2017 Remeron (7.5 mg) - helped me eat and sleep for 4 nights, then went bad Jan 2018 (stopped after 2 weeks) Lamictal (5.0 mg) - horrific withdrawal Jan 2018 - Oct 2020 TODAY - 100% DRUG FREE (Trialed Prozac, Effexor, Wellbutrin, Cymbalta - severe reaction, couldn't tolerate longer than a few days) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Emeritus apace41 Posted February 10, 2018 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted February 10, 2018 17 minutes ago, robcbar1 said: I would love to hear from someone who's been where we are and recovered. Best of luck to you my friend. Read the Success Stories, robcbar1. People have been where you are and recovered. I know several who I'm in touch with who have been to the bottom and are back up again. Read stories like AliG, Happy2Heal, Pug, Hudgens, Aeroman... Time...time... and more time. Best, Andy Sertraline 50mg and Clonazapam .375mg from 2000 -- symptoms of dizziness Spring 2012 increased to .5 Clonazapam and 100mg Sertraline -- no improvement Benzo microtaper from November 2012 to November 2014 (followed benzo sites "taper benzo first") Started Sertraline taper in December 2014 cut by 25mg to 75mg; 62.5mg 1/1/15 and 50mg on 2/1/15 Held at 50mg through April 5 to use liquid Reduced dosage in 10% or less drops from 50mg to 25mg -- at single tablet of 25mg on 10/5/15 Transitioned to all liquid for accuracy while tapering -- Horrible insomnia -- back to 25mg liquid and held until October 1, 2016 10/16 -- 11/18 tapered very slowly to 10.6mg. No real improvement and never really stable so updosed to 12.5mg (1/2 a pill) for convenience and long hold. After 8+ months of holding with no noticeable improvement decided to add .4ml of liquid Prozac (about 1.5mg) to see if that improves the situation Supplements, Magnesium, D3, Omega 3, curcumin, Valerian, 81mg Aspirin, L-Theanine, Vit. C, Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jorge24 Posted February 11, 2018 Share Posted February 11, 2018 Can Someone that had dp, dr or are going trough it explain how it makes you feel, think. I think i have it, got it when i went off my meds. It's only time the cure for it? Hate having the feeling that am in a dream, wanna feel normal again. My first antidepressant ever. Zoloft September 12, 2017. First 3, 4 days on 50 mg. My doctor lower my dose to 25 mg later that week. September 19. From September 19 till November 14 taking 25 mg. September 14 started to taper of 25 mg to half the pill. Did that for a week only September 14 is when i decided to quit completely. December 2 marks 18 days off Zoloft. Zyprexa for one week, November Ativan 1mg for one week, December Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Emeritus ChessieCat Posted February 11, 2018 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted February 11, 2018 Altostrata is the founder of this website. These are posts which she made on page one of this topic: On 23/07/2011 at 7:31 AM, Altostrata said: I had it for several years myself, after Paxil withdrawal. It gradually go better. It can be frightening, but you can look at it as a symptom of withdrawal, know that your brain will heal itself, and keep yourself from adding fear and panic to the symptoms. On 06/10/2011 at 9:49 AM, Altostrata said: As I understand it, depersonalization is usually described as a feeling of not really being present, or being behind glass, or not living one's life and feeling one's feelings -- being an observer. I had this for quite a while. I guess it very gradually diminished, until one day I realized I felt I *was* present. It was a very different feeling, and a huge relief. On 22/09/2012 at 5:56 AM, Altostrata said: A lot of people find this to be their most distressing drug-related symptom. I suffered from it for about 3 years after quitting Paxil, but it did very gradually lighten and then go away. * NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA * MISSION ACCOMPLISHED: (6 year taper) 0mg Pristiq on 13th November 2021 ADs since ~1992: 25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq: 50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity) Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021 LAST DOSE 0.0025mg Post 0 updates start here My tapering program My Intro (goes to tapering graph) VIDEO: Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jorge24 Posted February 12, 2018 Share Posted February 12, 2018 (edited) On 10/23/2017 at 10:54 PM, eric said: Just an observation here... I have noticed it over and over and over (and over) on here with Lexapro folks... PAWS seems to set in right around 3 months after the last dose. And it usually starts with anxiety. For me it was anxiety which led to DP + DR, which led to depression. With fatigue, cognition, and memory issues throughout. I had a solid 6 months (at least) of that hell until my first true window. It's just interesting to me that it seems to kick in for everyone at 3 months. The overall durations do seem to vary though. ... Never had dp, dr. Now i do coming off a ssri. You say it for most people it hits after 3 months off. Well you r right 5 days ago was 3 month's off then dp, dr started to kick in. So it's pretty much withdrawal and it will go away? Ahh just want my life back. Edited February 13, 2018 by scallywag trimmed quote to relevant portion My first antidepressant ever. Zoloft September 12, 2017. First 3, 4 days on 50 mg. My doctor lower my dose to 25 mg later that week. September 19. From September 19 till November 14 taking 25 mg. September 14 started to taper of 25 mg to half the pill. Did that for a week only September 14 is when i decided to quit completely. December 2 marks 18 days off Zoloft. Zyprexa for one week, November Ativan 1mg for one week, December Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Itzakadoozee Posted April 21, 2018 Share Posted April 21, 2018 Anyone try light sensitivity glasses to reduce the visuals of DP/DR? I wore some cheap light sensitivity glasses yesterday and found that everything looked a bit more normal. I even was having conversations better because everything looked more normal. 2005-2015 sertaline, 2015 to November 2018 escatalopram. Used liquid titration to drop doses. By 0.5mg at first then drops as small as 0.01mg at end of taper. Jumped of at 0.02mg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Noloft Posted September 12, 2018 Share Posted September 12, 2018 Mine came on with withdrawals and marijuana. Don’t smoke if you are in withdrawal or on psych drugs or if you struggle with an anxiety disorder such as OCD. It is a bad idea and it will derail your life even without withdrawal symptoms. Right now I basically have no idea who I am and can’t connect to my passion in life (fishing and hockey) and it makes engaging in these activities a lot less rewarding. Plus, I’m in withdrawal, so physically engaging in these activities is equally difficult.. rock and hard place doesn’t do it justice. I hope my DP improves with time. I would like to one day feel integrated again—think about something, feel interested, go do it. Instead of having a thought about something, feeling nothing toward it, then thinking about how I have to force myself to do everything these days. My DR is so much better than it was after my first week of withdrawal. Things still look off, but the severity of it when it first happened was crazy I thought I broke my eyes. A plus, I guess. Also, a lot less floaters. @Itzakadoozee I wear my sunglasses most of the time—they are polarized amber shade and takes away the glare of DR. I can see how any kind of eye protection can be beneficial. 2001-2017-worked my way up from 25mg of zoloft and 2mg of Concerta to 200mg of zoloft and 36mg of Concerta February 2017-Stopped Concerta cold turkey September 2017-Added 2mg of Abilify November 2017-came off Abilify December 2017-began taper of zoloft 50mg a week while tapering on to Viibryd January 2018-back on zoloft 200mg February 2018--tapered off zoloft over a month onto 40mg of prozac April 2018-CT prozac due to suspected "serotonin syndrome" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lloyd Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 DR has been the worst symptom for me hands down. Has anyone gotten it to go away after reinstating their medication? Paroxatine - 2004-2006 Effexor XR 75mg 2006 - 2016 (Discontinued Feb 2016) - Withdrawal for 6 months. Effexor XR 75mg Re-instated June 2017 (Discontinued Dec 2017) Effexor XR 2-3 mg Re-instated March 10 2018 - 1 day (Didn't work) Effexor XR 2mg Reinstated (Again) May 11 2018. 6 Beads July 2018 - 0.0mg of Effexor. Zilch Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
India Posted October 17, 2018 Share Posted October 17, 2018 On 1/1/2018 at 5:15 AM, DaisyBell said: I am not sure if I really have experienced Anhedonia. I have felt emotions differently than when I am normal, sometimes they are over exaggerated particularly the negative and sometimes they are not felt as deeply or broadly (with all the sensory experiences you have with each emotion) but not to the extent I've been concerned. Other symptoms seem to have my attention. I wouldn't say there is a connection between DP/DR and Anhedonia. You may heal from from those symptoms at different times. You will heal though. I have a sense that when I do, it will be cathartic and life will taste sweeter than ever before. BTW, it is normal to be overly focused on your situation to the exclusion of other things. This isn't a normal experience. However, being aware of that means you can change "the channel" so to speak. If you can find something that gives you a momentary escape, do that. Maybe play with your senses. Smell a rose. Taste an orange. Touch wool. Have a warm shower. Have a cold shower. Rub your toes against the carpet, feel the texture. Play with playdough...:) Paint a picture.... don't focus on the emotion just the sensation. You will heal. My Derealization ( some dp and dissociation intertwined) around the 3-4 week mark after a too fast taper. It was relentless after that . However, there have been some windows in the past month, times when I feel and the world feels between 30 and 70% "real" . I try to focus on sensations even if they are muted. So when swimming, the feel of water against my skin. The above it very good advice. I have had many meltdowns and panics. For me, it has been the worse symptom. I've noticed a healing stress free environment helps. Stress worsens. I've had to change my response to the DR/DP which has been the hardest thing. I had to approach it like a mindfulness approach to chronic pain. Try to eliminate the resistance and secondary suffering. I think this helps. I've had to accept this "dream" I feel I am in. I think belief in healing is hugely impactful. Yes, it can feel slow and never ending but I've tried to focus on the small gains. 1999: Paroxetine (20mg). Age 16. 2007-2008: Fluoxetine (Prozac) for 1.5 years (age 25) Citalopram 20mg 2002-2005, 2009: Escitalopram (20mg), 2 weeks, (age 26) (adverse reaction)/*Valium 5mg/Temazepam 10mg 2010: Mirtazipine (Remeron)( do not remember dosage) 2010, 5 months. 2010-2017: Citalopram (20mg) (age 27 to 34) 2016: i.1st Sept- 31st Oct Citalopram 10mg , ii.1st November 2017-30th November 2017, Citalopram 5mg iii.1st December 2017- 4th February 2018, Citalopram 0mg, iv.5th February 2018- March 2018 Citalopram 5mg (10mg every other day) 28th February- tried titration of 5mg ( some adverse effects) 2018: 1st March 2018- 1st June Citalopram 10 mg (tablet form) /started titration 8mg , then 7 mg.2018: June 15th- 10th July Citalopram 10 mg pill every other day 2018: 10th July - 13th Sept Citalopram- 0mg (CBD oil first month of 0mg, passiflora on and off) 2018 13th Sept Citalopram 2mg , approx 16th Sept 4mg , approx 25th Sept 6mg held. 2019: 11 Feb 19: 7mg (instant bad rxn) 12 Feb 19 6mg held 1 May 19 5.4mg held 5 Oct 19 5.36mg 22 Oct 19 5.29mg 30 Oct 19 5.23mg 4/NOV/19 5.18mg 12 Nov 19 5.08mg 20 Nov 19 4.77mg 7 May 22 2.31mg 17/09/2023 0.8mg (Herbal/Supplements since 1st September: Omega Fish Oil 1200mg, 663mg of EPA- 2 tablets a day, magnesium and magnesium bath salts) I did not die, and yet I lost life’s breath - Dante Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
India Posted October 18, 2018 Share Posted October 18, 2018 Interesting exert from Wikipedia on causes of ds/dp ( some do not differentiate). A good starting point for research. Simplistic but if the mechanism can be understood then maybe there is a way to facilitate healing using that pathway? From Wikipedia Derealization can accompany the neurological conditions of epilepsy(particularly temporal lobe epilepsy), migraine, and mild head injury.[4] There is a similarity between visual hypo-emotionality, a reduced emotional response to viewed objects, and derealization. This suggests a disruption of the process by which perception becomes emotionally coloured. This qualitative change in the experiencing of perception may lead to reports of anything viewed being unreal or detached.[2] Derealization can also manifest as an indirect result of certain vestibular disorders such as labyrinthitis. This is thought to result from the experience of anxiety precipitated by the functional disparity that arises between the ability to reconcile external stimuli relative to motion and equilibrioception that are compromised by vestibular dysfunction with the internal perceptions and expectations regarding the physical environment. An alternative explanation holds that a possible effect of vestibular dysfunction includes responses in the form of the modulation of noradrenergic and serotonergic activity due to a misattribution of vestibular symptoms to the presence of imminent physical danger resulting in the experience of anxiety or panic, which subsequently generate feelings of derealization.[5] 1999: Paroxetine (20mg). Age 16. 2007-2008: Fluoxetine (Prozac) for 1.5 years (age 25) Citalopram 20mg 2002-2005, 2009: Escitalopram (20mg), 2 weeks, (age 26) (adverse reaction)/*Valium 5mg/Temazepam 10mg 2010: Mirtazipine (Remeron)( do not remember dosage) 2010, 5 months. 2010-2017: Citalopram (20mg) (age 27 to 34) 2016: i.1st Sept- 31st Oct Citalopram 10mg , ii.1st November 2017-30th November 2017, Citalopram 5mg iii.1st December 2017- 4th February 2018, Citalopram 0mg, iv.5th February 2018- March 2018 Citalopram 5mg (10mg every other day) 28th February- tried titration of 5mg ( some adverse effects) 2018: 1st March 2018- 1st June Citalopram 10 mg (tablet form) /started titration 8mg , then 7 mg.2018: June 15th- 10th July Citalopram 10 mg pill every other day 2018: 10th July - 13th Sept Citalopram- 0mg (CBD oil first month of 0mg, passiflora on and off) 2018 13th Sept Citalopram 2mg , approx 16th Sept 4mg , approx 25th Sept 6mg held. 2019: 11 Feb 19: 7mg (instant bad rxn) 12 Feb 19 6mg held 1 May 19 5.4mg held 5 Oct 19 5.36mg 22 Oct 19 5.29mg 30 Oct 19 5.23mg 4/NOV/19 5.18mg 12 Nov 19 5.08mg 20 Nov 19 4.77mg 7 May 22 2.31mg 17/09/2023 0.8mg (Herbal/Supplements since 1st September: Omega Fish Oil 1200mg, 663mg of EPA- 2 tablets a day, magnesium and magnesium bath salts) I did not die, and yet I lost life’s breath - Dante Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fionas7 Posted November 12, 2018 Share Posted November 12, 2018 Fionas7 This is very interesting to me in that I have “lived” in these states including dissociation pretty much my whole life. I don’t remember a time when I didn’t experience this and this wasn’t caused by medication or withdrawals but from chronic trauma. It isn’t scary to me at all because I don’t know anything different. It has gotten worse throughout the years and/or I have become more aware of it so maybe it seems worse. Not sure. I’m so sorry all of you are experiencing this but it does appear there can be light at the end of the tunnel which is wonderful news! October 20, 2010 started 100 mg Lamictal. Gradually increased to 400 mg. Started decreasing dosage March 1, 2018. Completely off March 31, 2018 August 29, 2017 started Viibryd. Increased to 20 mg. June 18, 2018 lower dosage to 10 mg. July 25, 2018 reduced to 5 mg. August 6, 2018 completed off Viibryd. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nikola Posted February 19, 2019 Share Posted February 19, 2019 I have been having SEVERE DP/DR since month 4 after getting of venlafaxine. Its to the point where i cant hold a normal conversation and my eyesight is like i just drank a liter of vodka. Its really insane.. Its getting worse the more anxiety i have, which have been a whole lot.. It is by far the worst thing i have had to go through.. Is anyone else experiencing this? Nikola --Venlafaxine 300 mg from 2011 -2018, got off april 2018 after 14 months taper -25 mg klonopin a day from 2011- 2013, got off went thru extreme withdrawal for 2 years -Started using oxazepam and diazepam again due to extreme anxiety november 2018 currently on antihistamine (vallergan), diazepam, oxazepam and melatotin for sleep. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tanha Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 On 10/6/2011 at 12:49 AM, Altostrata said: As I understand it, depersonalization is usually described as a feeling of not really being present, or being behind glass, or not living one's life and feeling one's feelings -- being an observer. I had this for quite a while. I guess it very gradually diminished, until one day I realized I felt I *was* present. It was a very different feeling, and a huge relief. Thank you altostrata, to read this (in 2019) means hope and helps to see the looong timeframe as a chance that even after years it can improve. This symptom is really scary and enduring. Specially with a diazepam taper ahead of me (which is notorious for causing dp/dr) as I also know from experience. 2010-2018 sertralin, venlafaxin, cymbalta 120 mg, march bupropio, Lorazepam 4 to 0,5 mg qetiapine 200-400 mg Apr mirtazapin 30 - 45 mg, lo tapered, to 0; Apr switch to diazepam 3 mg; jun/jul 15mg, taper to approx. 4,5 mg, Aug: 200 to 400 mg q, 50 mg levomepromazine, m 45 to 30 mg; since tapered q 400-230 mg, m 30 to 15 mg, 1dez m to 16 mg, 4dez 250 mg q, 31. dec 200 mg q March 1, 2019 - 200 mg quetiapine, 4,5 mg diazepam, 16 mg mirtazapine March 3, 2019 - 200 mg quetiapine, 4,0 mg diazepam, 16 mg mirtazapine March 4, 2019 - 200 mg quetiapine, 4,2 mg diazepam,16 mg mirtazapine, june 5, 2019 - 100 mg quetiapine, 3 mg Diazepam, 12,185 mg mirtazapine Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tanha Posted February 24, 2019 Share Posted February 24, 2019 On 2/10/2018 at 8:56 PM, apace41 said: Read the Success Stories, robcbar1. People have been where you are and recovered. I know several who I'm in touch with who have been to the bottom and are back up again. Read stories like AliG, Happy2Heal, Pug, Hudgens, Aeroman... Time...time... and more time. Best, Andy Thank you so much for this post. To see the timeframe is shocking and helpful at the same time. 2010-2018 sertralin, venlafaxin, cymbalta 120 mg, march bupropio, Lorazepam 4 to 0,5 mg qetiapine 200-400 mg Apr mirtazapin 30 - 45 mg, lo tapered, to 0; Apr switch to diazepam 3 mg; jun/jul 15mg, taper to approx. 4,5 mg, Aug: 200 to 400 mg q, 50 mg levomepromazine, m 45 to 30 mg; since tapered q 400-230 mg, m 30 to 15 mg, 1dez m to 16 mg, 4dez 250 mg q, 31. dec 200 mg q March 1, 2019 - 200 mg quetiapine, 4,5 mg diazepam, 16 mg mirtazapine March 3, 2019 - 200 mg quetiapine, 4,0 mg diazepam, 16 mg mirtazapine March 4, 2019 - 200 mg quetiapine, 4,2 mg diazepam,16 mg mirtazapine, june 5, 2019 - 100 mg quetiapine, 3 mg Diazepam, 12,185 mg mirtazapine Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kronos18 Posted February 28, 2019 Share Posted February 28, 2019 I’m having it since i took Lorazepam for panic attacks, during withdrawal.After I took Lorazepam, I started taking Lexapro and DR/DP was still there.Now i’m one month off lexapro which I took for 2 months and DR/DP is still here, strenghtened.I think about it most of the time, as I am only 21 years old and I can’t see myself going through life like this, I can barely do something.What scares me the most is that it’s going to take years like this, and I will never be the same.It hurts so much, I feel so lonely and sad. Lorazepam -2 weeks-1 week 3 mg.4 days 2mg, 3 days 1mg. 13-27 November 2018 Lexapro -2 months-6 weeks of 10mg, 2 weeks of 5mg 27 November 2018-27 January 2019 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Emeritus ChessieCat Posted March 12, 2019 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted March 12, 2019 And a bit of humour: comics-life-with-depersonalization-derealisation-disorder * NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA * MISSION ACCOMPLISHED: (6 year taper) 0mg Pristiq on 13th November 2021 ADs since ~1992: 25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq: 50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity) Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021 LAST DOSE 0.0025mg Post 0 updates start here My tapering program My Intro (goes to tapering graph) VIDEO: Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jonnypeters1234567 Posted March 19, 2019 Share Posted March 19, 2019 Anyone had it so bad they don't recognise family anymore? 2009-2010 Citalopram 20mg CT no problems Sertaline 2010- 6monnths 2011- 2017 June 2017- Citalopram 20mg CT Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
India Posted March 19, 2019 Share Posted March 19, 2019 Can I add (apologies if I’ve already addressed this), that alcohol dampens down my derealization dramatically . I feel almost normal again, even after one glass of wine . Obviously, it is not a long term recovery strategy , i’m trying to completely cut it out, but every now and again I will slip because it offers me such instant emotional relief. It is interesting to note this in context of the processes involved in derealisation. Alcohol acts on the CNS . It would seem stress and the reduction of it a variable too. I don’t know enough about how alcohol acts on the brain. I drank alcohol in tandem with my 9 year of ssri use. So far, meditation hasn’t had the same effect but hopefully accumulative acts that destress the body/mind in a healthy way will have similar effect. Anyone else find they’ve had similar experiences? Or any theories on why alcohol would be a shortcut to reduction of derealization? 1999: Paroxetine (20mg). Age 16. 2007-2008: Fluoxetine (Prozac) for 1.5 years (age 25) Citalopram 20mg 2002-2005, 2009: Escitalopram (20mg), 2 weeks, (age 26) (adverse reaction)/*Valium 5mg/Temazepam 10mg 2010: Mirtazipine (Remeron)( do not remember dosage) 2010, 5 months. 2010-2017: Citalopram (20mg) (age 27 to 34) 2016: i.1st Sept- 31st Oct Citalopram 10mg , ii.1st November 2017-30th November 2017, Citalopram 5mg iii.1st December 2017- 4th February 2018, Citalopram 0mg, iv.5th February 2018- March 2018 Citalopram 5mg (10mg every other day) 28th February- tried titration of 5mg ( some adverse effects) 2018: 1st March 2018- 1st June Citalopram 10 mg (tablet form) /started titration 8mg , then 7 mg.2018: June 15th- 10th July Citalopram 10 mg pill every other day 2018: 10th July - 13th Sept Citalopram- 0mg (CBD oil first month of 0mg, passiflora on and off) 2018 13th Sept Citalopram 2mg , approx 16th Sept 4mg , approx 25th Sept 6mg held. 2019: 11 Feb 19: 7mg (instant bad rxn) 12 Feb 19 6mg held 1 May 19 5.4mg held 5 Oct 19 5.36mg 22 Oct 19 5.29mg 30 Oct 19 5.23mg 4/NOV/19 5.18mg 12 Nov 19 5.08mg 20 Nov 19 4.77mg 7 May 22 2.31mg 17/09/2023 0.8mg (Herbal/Supplements since 1st September: Omega Fish Oil 1200mg, 663mg of EPA- 2 tablets a day, magnesium and magnesium bath salts) I did not die, and yet I lost life’s breath - Dante Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kronos18 Posted March 19, 2019 Share Posted March 19, 2019 Hi.I am having derealization and you should consider changing your thinking into a little bit positive one and stop thinking about dr/dp in order to cure it Lorazepam -2 weeks-1 week 3 mg.4 days 2mg, 3 days 1mg. 13-27 November 2018 Lexapro -2 months-6 weeks of 10mg, 2 weeks of 5mg 27 November 2018-27 January 2019 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tanha Posted March 19, 2019 Share Posted March 19, 2019 36 minutes ago, jonnypeters1234567 said: Anyone had it so bad they don't recognise family anymore? Yes. Definitely. 2010-2018 sertralin, venlafaxin, cymbalta 120 mg, march bupropio, Lorazepam 4 to 0,5 mg qetiapine 200-400 mg Apr mirtazapin 30 - 45 mg, lo tapered, to 0; Apr switch to diazepam 3 mg; jun/jul 15mg, taper to approx. 4,5 mg, Aug: 200 to 400 mg q, 50 mg levomepromazine, m 45 to 30 mg; since tapered q 400-230 mg, m 30 to 15 mg, 1dez m to 16 mg, 4dez 250 mg q, 31. dec 200 mg q March 1, 2019 - 200 mg quetiapine, 4,5 mg diazepam, 16 mg mirtazapine March 3, 2019 - 200 mg quetiapine, 4,0 mg diazepam, 16 mg mirtazapine March 4, 2019 - 200 mg quetiapine, 4,2 mg diazepam,16 mg mirtazapine, june 5, 2019 - 100 mg quetiapine, 3 mg Diazepam, 12,185 mg mirtazapine Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kronos18 Posted March 19, 2019 Share Posted March 19, 2019 Worrying about it makes it worse.I did this in the beginning and it got more power over me.It’s hard bot to think about it, but try your best and when you feel like going crazy, i do say these things to me “ if i were going crazy, i wouldn’t be able to .....” drive for example, the dr dp is curable in months, but it depends individually how you approach it.Diet, exercise, acting normal and not thinking about it is the key. Lorazepam -2 weeks-1 week 3 mg.4 days 2mg, 3 days 1mg. 13-27 November 2018 Lexapro -2 months-6 weeks of 10mg, 2 weeks of 5mg 27 November 2018-27 January 2019 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kronos18 Posted March 19, 2019 Share Posted March 19, 2019 What is done is done, we have it, so it depends on us if we really want to cure it.Oh and I forgot, accept it as a part of you for now, don’t fight it.And socialise as much as possible. Lorazepam -2 weeks-1 week 3 mg.4 days 2mg, 3 days 1mg. 13-27 November 2018 Lexapro -2 months-6 weeks of 10mg, 2 weeks of 5mg 27 November 2018-27 January 2019 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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