Rachellynn: Prozac & Remeron support :)

[Rachellynn]

I think it’s between 1,2, 4, 6?

 

maybe micro-cuts of trileptal and Valium and leave the remeron? 

 

What do do the mods say?

 

did you only sleep from 1-4? Ugh. 

 

I think i need to take remeron/Baclofen together and not take it when i wake up because I’m already weak/exhausted. Bleh. 

 

Can you take a nap? Do you nap?

 

sending love Grace❤️

[Rachellynn]

Decided that I’m going to heal 100%❤️

[Rachellynn]

Ebb and flow❤️❤️❤️

[ChessieCat]

On 2/21/2019 at 4:28 AM, Rachellynn said:

I think I’m going to write a book. I wrote a children’s book when i first got “sick” - any publishers on here? Lol😂

 

If you can't get it print published you could get it ebook published.  https://www.lulu.com/  Create, publish and sell your book for free.  (Disclaimer:  no affiliation - I've found books on there that I have purchased)

[savinggrace]

I am taking no post today as a good sign, Rachellyn.  I am crossing my fingers for you.  Yes, I think remeron at night for sure.  Don't know much about Baclofen but it seems like that should be a night time thing, too, unless it has a short half-life and needs multiple-dosing.

 

No I have never been able to nap.  Even if up for 2 days.  If I fall asleep, my body jerks itself awake in just minutes.  I am in a hyper-aroused state all the time.

Hope the night treats you well. 

Grace

[Goosie]

Sending love 

[Carmie]

On 3/1/2019 at 7:19 AM, Rachellynn said:

Decided that I’m going to heal 100%❤️

 

On 3/1/2019 at 9:18 AM, Rachellynn said:

Ebb and flow❤️❤️❤️

 

That’s a really good attitude Rachellyn, 

 

Hope you’re doing okay today💚

[Rabe]

Hi Rachellynn, 

I am sorry for the delay...have not been well since having couple procedures...struggling with electrolytes and eating etc.

How did you find out about your electrolytes ad your histamine issues?  Im sorry you have these as well...makes things a whole lot more challenging I think....at least I find that.  How are you doing?  Take care!💜

[Rachellynn]

On the 7th - i slept from 5pm-7:30 and 11:30-4:30am. 😱😱😱

 

tonight - zero. WHAT IS THAT?😂😭

 

i know my body can do it, so what gives? 

 

@savinggrace @Goosie @Carmie @Rabe

 

Thanks for stopping by❤️❤️❤️

 

@Rabe look into adding whole food adrenal cocktail, coconut water, salt and fresh squeezed orange! I also take “hista-block” 

 

really condiering trying ambien 2.5mg. But I’m golfing out 😕

 

never taken anything to sleep ever before this. So frustrating. Laying in bed all night. 

 

Sending love over to everyone!

 

 

 

[savinggrace]

Just so you know, Rachellyn, 2.5 ambien is equivalent to 1.25 Valium and won’t do much. It poops out too. 10 years ago I was up to 20/night in order to sleep w/ klonopin as well. I had to updose klonopin to get off ambien. 

 

I know it’s hard to do when you’re exhausted from sleep deprivation but I do think trying not to nap and condensing your sleep will help train your brain. 

 

Grace

[Rachellynn]

Thanks @savinggrace - so hard to know what to do. I know this website is about minimizing and going off drugs and not adding them. BUT. At four years off Prozac and going through another crash, something has to change. Maybe i try/stick to .5mg Prozac to see if i can stabalize on that. I have to somehow start getting sleep because it’s causing me to become very very thin. 

 

I wish i reinstated prozac all those years ago, when i probably still could:/ wish I found this website sooner, wish i found it in 2014 before i got off Prozac. I have gray hair, I’m 38. I live in a bed...this is insane to me. 

 

I didnt mean to nap, i layed down to meditate and fell asleep😱 hat hasn’t happened to me in four months. I’ve barely been able to meditate actually!

 

 

[eymen23]

2 hours ago, Rachellynn said:

On the 7th - i slept from 5pm-7:30 and 11:30-4:30am. 😱😱😱

 

tonight - zero. WHAT IS THAT?😂😭

 

 

 

Hi Rachellynn,

 

7.5 hours of total sleep is good. I suspect that if you avoid taking any new drugs or supplements, and keep things consistent, you will slowly trend in the right direction. 

[Rachellynn]

1 minute ago, eymen23 said:

7.5 hours of total sleep is good. I suspect that if you avoid taking any new drugs or supplements, and keep things consistent, you will slowly trend in the right direction. 

And though i still did not feel good yesterday, i was so happy that my body has not forgotten how to sleep. But, last night getting zero?! I was not even stressed about sleeping yesterday because i realized that it’s possible. Almost nothing feels more desperate than not sleeping @Goosie am i right? How’s your sleep?

 

 

 

 

[Goosie]

Yes @Rachellynn I agree with you.  Not sleeping is hell.  I have the same exact thing going on- I am relaxed and feeling “good” and yet those nights are the ones I often don’t sleep.   

 

In positive news news I have started to stabilize in the past week ( been in crisis for 8 long months) and though I am sure it will not last , I take it as a sign that it is possible to stabilize.    

 

Try to keep the faith.   I visualize being healthy as much as I can.   The book “ you are the placebo” explains how you can trick your cells into health through visualization/ mediation.   

At least it makes me feel like I am doing something.   

Please know that I pray for you and that I believe you can get through this.  

 

Lots of love 

❤️ 

[Rachellynn]

That’s amazing that you are stabilizing!!! Yay:))))))))

 

oddly enogh, the night that i slept, i had not taken the remeron the night before. I think i slept for two hours and forgot to take it. Next night i slept 7.5 hours and i took it at 8pm?! Last night nothing. Bleeeehhhhhh. You didn’t try anything else right? Just curing the hydroxyzine?

 

❤️❤️❤️

[Goosie]

Hi @Rachellynn   I am tapering hydroxizine ( down to 15-18 mg) and taking melatonin.  I don’t think the hydroxizine is doing me any favors.   One thing I notice is this :4 hours sleep with less hydroxizine is better than 6 hours sleep with more.   

 

I also take sone herbal stuff like Passion flower tincture.  Who knows if that helps.     

 

For me stabilization looks like this:  I manage to get to sleep sometime during the night. Last night I went to bed at 11 and fell asleep after 3 am.   I woke at 8.     I have slept a little bit each night since Sunday.   It’s still very stressful being awake and not knowing if illl get to sleep but it is comforting to know that my body hasn’t forgotten how to sleep.   

Last month I stabilized for 3 whole weeks and then went back to many non consecutive nights no sleep.   So it is definitely not a linear road to better but I am praying that this is what getting better looks like.  

I seem to destabilize when I get my period.  I barely bleed so there is something amiss there.

Also, I have to force myself to eat or I will lose weight.  So you are not alone in the weight loss. I pretty much eat all day just to maintain.  

 

Sending hugs and prayers.    If I can do it so can you.   We will both make it. 

[Rachellynn]

Thank you @Goosie LOVE YOU❤️

[Rachellynn]

@Goosie yes - my period too. Low Iron i think. 

[Rachellynn]

Dr. Shipko said that the only reasonable treatment for protracted withdrawal MIGHT be benzos for life. 

[bheb]

I'm sure Shipko means well but that doesn't seem wise at all to me. I get it, do what you need to do to keep yourself alive but benzos tend to bring a lot of their own problems. I think he also recommends red wine for akathisia (unless I have confused him with someone else)? I definitely heeded that "advice" in the early days but it clearly did not help the akathisia, just masked it so I would wake up feeling just as horrible as before, and sometimes worse. 

 

At least he recognizes how awful these symptoms are that people would want to seek desperate measures. Just wish there could be safer things out there for him to recommend. And that's not his fault necessarily; I've met and spoke with good doctors who see how severe the problem is and just want to give their patients something for relief. 

 

 

[Rachellynn]

I know. Really, it’s all just “do the best you can with self-care” while we are ignored by the world. obviously, the answer is not more drugs. I have prescriptions for ambien, Gabapentin, trazadone. Ambien Scares Me. The list goes on - i don’t take them. I was sent some Lavela - maybe i could try that. 

 

And well meaming Drs that have NO CLUE are like - we must treat this anxiety with Lexapro, or whatever.... it’s maddening. It’s the most silent crises, twilight zone world. 

 

Anyhow, i fantasize that eating broccoli deliveries the same feeling as Klonopin but with all the added nutrients and “side effects” of broccoli😂 and it never poops out on us, and we all feel relaxed, safe, loved and joyful every waking moment. The other moments are perfect uninterrupted 7 hours of sleep every night. In my mind Dr’s are shamans and we go on vision quests and do yoga as therapy, listen to wonderful music and create art all day. We can do away with big cities, we all live amongst nature, with gardens and animals. No smog or pollutants. The world and our bodies clean as Mother Nature intended it all. The human race has truly lost its way. Greed and money. I guess it’s probably never been easy on us humans. Perhaps some cultures, especially the ones who embrace a village style life - I’ve ALWAYS craved that in my bones. I just didn’t know how to get where i wanted to go, so...in come the AD’s - they never helped, until i got off and “relapsed.” 

 

Anyway. As debilitated as i am in this moment..i see something beautiful and I’m holding on to it❤️

 

[Rachellynn]

18 minutes ago, bheb said:

do what you need to do to keep yourself alive but benzos tend to bring a lot of their own problems.

@bheb totally! It’s just so crazy when i read on forums how people say - Klonopin literally saved my life! I started on .5 in the morning and 2mg at night for sleep, but now i only take .5 at night and find myself needing less, etC.... literally so many and then of course all they nightmare stories too “they ruined my life” etc... i wish i could be one of those success stories. I’ve taken them before but only at very low doses and for short periods of time so i have no idea when i would hit tolerance and i think that would be a huge fear. But i imagine myself being able to start doing yoga again - and i just know that would heal me. As it started to in 2018...😌

[bheb]

Oh interesting, I just looked up Lavela and didn't know you could take lavender orally.

 

Yeah, I took benzos two years ago, hit tolerance/dependence and then tapered off too fast and was hit with awful mental symptoms. Those are gone now that I've been holding for a while. Benzos never really touched the akathisia for me, just made me drowsy. 

 

That's really great that you said yoga was healing you before! I started yoga in January now and haven't noticed  much, but we'll see.

[Altostrata]

5 hours ago, Rachellynn said:

Dr. Shipko said that the only reasonable treatment for protracted withdrawal MIGHT be benzos for life. 

 

Please recount that conversation in more detail. When was the last time you spoke to Dr. Shipko?

[Rabe]

14 hours ago, Rachellynn said:

 look into adding whole food adrenal cocktail, coconut water, salt and fresh squeezed orange! I also take “hista-block” 

 

really condiering trying ambien 2.5mg. But I’m golfing out 😕

 

never taken anything to sleep ever before t

Hi Rachellynn, I add nothing add this point...no supplements, adrenal things, no food changes...I react to oranges and many other foods so I just keep things pretty stable...except things like the procedure I had which totally upended me again!  But scaled diet back again and just trying to keep everything else as consistent as am able.  Sometimes I think even the 'natural' things are not seen so by our unstable systems...at least for me.  Take care!💜

[Rachellynn]

13 hours ago, Altostrata said:

 

Please recount that conversation in more detail. When was the last time you spoke to Dr. Shipko?

It was an article that he wrote. I have never spoken with him. I’ll try to find it but the quote was something like...”some may need to use benzodiazepines for life” 

 

i literally cannot finf it right now and it could be an old article...just ordered milk peptides:)

 

 

[Rachellynn]

One night of 7.5 hours broken sleep. 2 nights zero sleep. Praying for sleep today🤗

[bheb]

Oh it was Healy who mentioned wine and akathisia, my bad about that.

 

Anyway, I''m sorry you're still struggling with sleep. Was the 7.5 hours broken last night? Or zero last night?

[Rachellynn]

That was two nights ago. Last two nights, zero sleep. Maybe a little in and out last night - very light and very little. Kept just replaying my meditation 😕

 

 

[bheb]

I see, well hopefully your body will be so exhausted by the time tonight rolls around that you'll get some rest.

[Rachellynn]

I hope so🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼

 

[Shep]

On 2/27/2019 at 3:49 PM, Rachellynn said:

I have also just yesterday met with a skilled skilled sleep specialist/psychiatrist who knows about withdrawal. 

 

I have started low dose baclofen to help with gaba and to reduce high glutamic activity (Akathisia, Insomina - over time)

 

ive also started on H1 and H2 blockers to reduce Mast Cell issues, which I’ve had before. This is also excitatory. 

 

Next, i beleive we will move to progesterone treatment - which i do need and apparently also increases the production of gaba. 

 

Please no horror stories or giving me crap about adding meds. I am very hopeful about this Dr. and am looking forward to the improvements. When i used H1 and H2 blockers in the past - it helped me immensely.

 

I also lowered to 7.5mg remeron (took this at 6pm - I KNOW but i was exhausted) per his instruction. I slept for a few hours (6:30-11pm broken) and then took 2.5 baclofen, felt very relaxed, and then after a couple hours took another 2.5. I fell asleep for another couple hours. 2-5am. 

 

17 hours ago, Rachellynn said:

It’s just so crazy when i read on forums how people say - Klonopin literally saved my life! I started on .5 in the morning and 2mg at night for sleep, but now i only take .5 at night and find myself needing less, etC.

 

Rachellynn, I'm very confused on what you are taking now. Your recent reduction of Remeron from 10 MG to 7.5 Mg is a 25% reduction, along with adding in other drugs may be the root of your current insomnia. 

 

Please post the names of the drugs that are H1 and H2 blockers. 

 

And your comment on Klonopin - are you now taking .5 mg at night or was that in the past? 

 

Please post a list of the drugs you are currently taking, the times of day you take them, and the dose. 

[Rachellynn]

Hey @Shep - my insomnia started a few months ago. I tried the Baclofen but the side effects were to great. For some reason - new Dr. (the one that worked with @Altostrata) said i don’t really need to taper remeron and he thinks it’s contributing to my insomnia - which cannot be true. I’m not taking any benzos currently but the desire is GREAT. 

 

At this point ive made so many short term changes, i have no idea what to do:/

 

the insomnia started after after i went into shock getting physical therapy, only to be hurt more by a massage, etc... my nervous system is on overdrive and I’ve got to do something to calm it. 

 

I wish there was was a way to micro-dose Klonopin so that the effects were very minimal along with the side effects...but over time working to slowly settle the system as apposed to huge 1mg dose shocks. 

 

Anyhow, thanks for stopping by. I did get Ativan from the hospital in February which helped and then didn’t. I took it for a week. .5mg two nights and then cut it down until i was off. Obviously not great. Trying to stay away from adding anything at this point but my sleep is very very patchy. 

 

Any insight would be helpful. 

 

Im told to add progesterone, l-theanine and milk peptides..,

 

 

[Shep]

Again, what drugs are you currently taking?

 

15 minutes ago, Shep said:

Please post a list of the drugs you are currently taking, the times of day you take them, and the dose. 

 

 

[Altostrata]

4 minutes ago, Rachellynn said:

i don’t really need to taper remeron and he thinks it’s contributing to my insomnia - which cannot be true. I’m not taking any benzos currently but the desire is GREAT. 

 

Remeron does not seem to be helping. If it's not helping, it may be hurting. You've been taking Remeron only since Feb. 10. You do not need to taper it at 10%. If you don't feel comfortable quitting it, I'd cut it by 25% every few days.

 

If you don't want to give the doctor's program a chance, you should stop seeing him. You seem to be yearning for a benzo. If you won't be satisfied until you're taking one, there are many doctors who would prescribe one for you.

[Rachellynn]

@Altostrata i don’t want a Benzo. It’s just that not sleeping is insane. 

 

I have been on remeron for 1.5 years. I just updose to 10mg on feb 10 due to new insomnia. I am now at 7.5 again because that wasn’t helping. 

 

7am- hista-block supplement and Pepcid 

8am - breakfast

9am - tea

10am - snack

10:30 - l-theanine 

12:00 - lunch

1:00- light yoga

5:00- Dinner

6:00 - mediate 

8:00 - 7.5mg remeron 

 

@Shep thank you, i hope this helps!