Earthworm: stuck in dirt

[Earthworm]

*moved from symptoms forum

 

Anyone try Brintellix (vortioxetine)?

 

What has your experience been like?

Edited November 12, 2015 by Petunia
added note and topic title

[Petunia]

Brintellix is an antidepressant.

 

This is a site for going off drugs. It is not a site for finding out what drug to take next, comparing drug cocktails, or recommending what drug to add. This could be dangerous. People could be hurt by your advice.
 
(We do not know of any drugs or drug combination that will fix withdrawal syndrome. Reinstatement of the original drug, often at a low dose, sometimes helps and sometimes does not.)
 
If you want to discuss your diagnoses and talk about adding to your drug cocktail, there are other support sites for this...

 

See: What will get you warned or banned - Drug shopping or recommending drugs

[Earthworm]

I wanna know if people here got WD symptoms from it or not.

[Petunia]

It looks like there are a couple of people here using it, see:

 

Tapering vortioxetine (Brintellix) - does anyone have any ...

[starcontrol2]

Hi Earthworm,

 

I read your thread and I am sorry you are suffering so much.

You mention you did some stuff with music on internet. You got bored but at least you have capacity to enjoy things and complete tasks. There are many things you can do via internet to try to make money.

Our stories are different and I can't enjoy anything and I don't have any stability. Seems like you are bad but stable.

But you have to change something even if it means reducing dosage super super slowly.

I, myself would hate to feel even worse but I have to get off and give myself a chance med free.

Also, finding love could be a great motivator. I know 2 people whose new love enabled them to completely change everything and get off meds.

[Altostrata]

I think you can be absolutely sure adverse effects from Brintellix, including withdrawal syndrome, have been under-reported if not deliberately hidden.

[JanCarol]

Hey Earthworm - that's some cat!  I can feel what the cat is feeling when I look at that picture.  

 

I see you are still around - how are you going since you last posted symptoms?

[Earthworm]

Not much has been changing in my life. The first 4 years of withdrawal have been tough, primarily due to very strong 24/7 akathisia and strong OCD. The last 5 years though have been easier in that I can be at peace if I avoid triggers, and that means sitting at home all day and doing nothing. It's starting to bother me though, that my life isn't going anywhere. It's much better than being in severe hell of the initial 4 years, but I've been 5 years of stable but non-functional now. My social anxiety disorder is bad and the reason I'm confined to asocial life. The OCD is still strong enough to disable me from being able to work, and even doing tasks at home triggers it as well. Therapy has been useless in the years that I've done it, self-help therapy too, although I keep trying to attempt it.

 

My SAD and OCD and probably my insomnia too aren't gonna get better if I taper off the demon citalopram. My goal is to switch to another drug to replace it instead. My brain is so fried now I can't even imagine ever getting off this drug. I've tried several other drugs in the last few years, but they either don't do anything or make me sicker, and it takes months sometimes to fully recover from them. Nevertheless, I feel I have no choice, either waste my life living like this forever, or try new drugs. I'm hoping newer generations of drugs will be better, and that maybe one day I'll find one that works.

[Hopefull]

Hi Earthworm,

Have you thought about neurofeedback?

Maybe it could help you with OCD compulsions?

Have you thought about getting a packing job in a factory, something simple, until you figure out what you want to do or can do? Even a cleaning job at night where you don't need to deal with people a lot? Cleaning office, landscapinhg, etc?

Aged Care work, night shifts?

Maybe getting a job, could help you move forward in life.

Even studying on line?

I wish you all the best, sorry to hear that not much has changed in your life.

Don't give up hope. Take care, Hopefull.

[Earthworm]

Hi Earthworm,

Have you thought about neurofeedback?

Maybe it could help you with OCD compulsions?

Have you thought about getting a packing job in a factory, something simple, until you figure out what you want to do or can do? Even a cleaning job at night where you don't need to deal with people a lot? Cleaning office, landscapinhg, etc?

Aged Care work, night shifts?

Maybe getting a job, could help you move forward in life.

Even studying on line?

I wish you all the best, sorry to hear that not much has changed in your life.

Don't give up hope. Take care, Hopefull.

 

I forgot what neurofeedback is. In order for me to do the jobs you've listed, I'd really need to have my OCD fixed. I can't even send out my own box or envelope without checking it and tearing it open to check again and again, that's really not gonna go well at a packing job. Cleaning starts perfectionistic obsessions too, I try to avoid cleaning and hate cleaning because of this... I keep my room very organized by always putting things back in their place in order to avoid cleaning. Looking after elderly would be a possibility if responsibilities wouldn't trigger OCD... obsessions will start about doing something wrong, someone dying, and me getting in lots of trouble. I searched online before for ideas of jobs that wouldn't trigger my OCD, but haven't found any.

 

The only idea I have so far is trying to learn to draw and paint by myself at home. In the past even this was not a good idea because of how much my OCD was triggered by this activity.

[bheb]

Hi earthworm. I remember reading your story when I first came to this site. How are you doing nowadays?

[Hannahe]

On 10/30/2018 at 2:09 AM, Earthworm said:

I was one of the few people for who the SSRI actually worked as intended. Although it took 6 months for it to start working. It reduced my anxiety by 85% and completely took out all depression, sadness, and ability to cry. I couldn't be sad or cry even when I tried. It was a great drug. I do wish I could stay on it for life, just the inability to feel sad or cry is a great blessing to have, but it also took care of most of my anxiety disorder. Sadly the drugs effect wears out for me after about 2 or 3 years. The best part of my life was during the year that I the drug worked as intended. I didn't feel like a zombie at all, I felt completely normal, minus depression and sadness and most of the anxiety.

 

The withdrawal ended up ruining my life though. If not for the withdrawal it would have been great.

 

And don't tell me its placebo effect, I been on it for 12 years now, had several severe crashes in tapers, and know what it can and can't do for me by now.

How are you doing now Earthworm? Are withdrawals over for you? Are you off the meds? 

[Earthworm]

On 6/29/2019 at 11:39 AM, Hannahe said:

How are you doing now Earthworm? Are withdrawals over for you? Are you off the meds? 

 

Withdrawal still going strong, and still on meds. It's been 11 years now of withdrawal, and it looks like it will stay this way for the rest of my life. The only thing that improved has been the akathisia, it kept going down over the years, and is not an issue anymore.

I was never able to stabilize on the drugs, although they did improve the withdrawal, so it was the right option for me to reinstate. Now I'll never be able to get off them.

My life isn't horrible though these days, as long as I stay at home all day and do nothing but waste time on PC. I actually feel almost normal doing that. It is however when I start doing things that the symptoms appear, and can be hellish. As long as I avoid triggers, my life is quite fine, which is already a great relief compared to my early years. However, I'll never be able to work, or have a relationship, or finish school, or have a normal social life. I am also concerned about the effects of long term drug use. It's messing with my hormones, and my prolactin is twice the maximum level. There are also risks of tardive dyskinesia and diabetes showing up later on... so the future looks grim.

[Cocopuffz17]

2 hours ago, Earthworm said:

 

Withdrawal still going strong, and still on meds. It's been 11 years now of withdrawal, and it looks like it will stay this way for the rest of my life. The only thing that improved has been the akathisia, it kept going down over the years, and is not an issue anymore.

 I was never able to stabilize on the drugs, although they did improve the withdrawal, so it was the right option for me to reinstate. Now I'll never be able to get off them.

My life isn't horrible though these days, as long as I stay at home all day and do nothing but waste time on PC. I actually feel almost normal doing that. It is however when I start doing things that the symptoms appear, and can be hellish. As long as I avoid triggers, my life is quite fine, which is already a great relief compared to my early years. However, I'll never be able to work, or have a relationship, or finish school, or have a normal social life. I am also concerned about the effects of long term drug use. It's messing with my hormones, and my prolactin is twice the maximum level. There are also risks of tardive dyskinesia and diabetes showing up later on... so the future looks grim.

Have you ever considered changing your diet? I was unable to come off AD's for 5-6 years and this time I have come off them. There are withdrawals... but I am holding my job down and still playing sports. Which I was completely unable to in previous attempts to come off. Nutrition is great medicine, it took me a long time to realize this.

[Earthworm]

5 hours ago, Cocopuffz17 said:

Have you ever considered changing your diet? I was unable to come off AD's for 5-6 years and this time I have come off them. There are withdrawals... but I am holding my job down and still playing sports. Which I was completely unable to in previous attempts to come off. Nutrition is great medicine, it took me a long time to realize this.

 

I tried diets years ago, even did a raw vegan diet for a month. I just try to eat healthy now, lots of fruits, vegetables, not a lot of fried food.

I don't plan to get off the drugs because I need them. If my insomnia would go away, I'd be able to taper risperdal, because I use that only for insomnia. The Celexa also helps a lot with my OCD, without it I can't survive. So I'm stuck on them.

[Cocopuffz17]

6 hours ago, Earthworm said:

 

I tried diets years ago, even did a raw vegan diet for a month. I just try to eat healthy now, lots of fruits, vegetables, not a lot of fried food.

I don't plan to get off the drugs because I need them. If my insomnia would go away, I'd be able to taper risperdal, because I use that only for insomnia. The Celexa also helps a lot with my OCD, without it I can't survive. So I'm stuck on them.

I felt the same way. I had insomnia for 15 years. I thought I’d never get rid of it. I changed my diet by following The Plant Paradox by Dr.Gundry. It changed my life, my insomnia all but faded away. I have been able to come off my AD with relatively small amounts of WD feelings that I was not able to in the past. By the sounds of it you have nothing to lose and everything to gain. All I did was become disciplined on the foods I put in my body.

[bheb]

21 hours ago, Earthworm said:

 

Withdrawal still going strong, and still on meds. It's been 11 years now of withdrawal, and it looks like it will stay this way for the rest of my life. The only thing that improved has been the akathisia, it kept going down over the years, and is not an issue anymore.

I was never able to stabilize on the drugs, although they did improve the withdrawal, so it was the right option for me to reinstate. Now I'll never be able to get off them.

My life isn't horrible though these days, as long as I stay at home all day and do nothing but waste time on PC. I actually feel almost normal doing that. It is however when I start doing things that the symptoms appear, and can be hellish. As long as I avoid triggers, my life is quite fine, which is already a great relief compared to my early years. However, I'll never be able to work, or have a relationship, or finish school, or have a normal social life. I am also concerned about the effects of long term drug use. It's messing with my hormones, and my prolactin is twice the maximum level. There are also risks of tardive dyskinesia and diabetes showing up later on... so the future looks grim.

 

Earthworm, first off...that's wonderful news that the akathisia is fading! I know you struggled with it for such a long time. Not to minimize your ongoing concerns, but it must be a great relief to be free from it. To be able to sit comfortably.

 

Even with akathisia, I've also found that a "do nothing" prescription kinda helps. It's once I get riled up, start moving around a lot and then try to sit do I experience the worst akathisia. 

 

I know it must be hard to be so isolated. And I know you aren't so hopeful about this (which is okay) but I really think you might eventually find more fulfillment. And won't have to make the painful tradeoff between living life and minimizing symptoms. Hell, if your brain can bounce back from akathisia, there's a chance that overall WD will ease too. 

 

I'm sorry you're still struggling so much but glad to hear there are some improvements and that you are able to find a little peace.