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JackieDecides
On 9/29/2020 at 1:54 PM, Happy2Heal said:

just a short few weeks til I'm 3 years past zero!! 

 

congratulations!  as always, you are an inpiration to me.  and the way time passes, both slow and fast, makes sense since covid. I find the days draaaaaag and the months fly by. 

 

 

On 9/29/2020 at 1:54 PM, Happy2Heal said:

I've got myself an instant pot, best invention ever!!

 

I need to find out more about this - I have no personal experience but have heard others rave about it. so, it's the opposite of a slow cooker?  the only thing I've used is a "crockpot" - in fact, I own one but haven't used it in a year - and I'm not even sure if it's the same thing as a "slow cooker". 

 

On 9/29/2020 at 1:54 PM, Happy2Heal said:

but it makes me a little sad that I don't appreciate what I have now

 

yes, apparently we all have to work at that as hard as we can. our brains keep re-setting to say, OK THIS is now normal and we don't recall it used to be worse without putting in some effort. 

 

the last time I'd lived through a smoke season (from wildfires) I swore I'd never take clean air for granted and I kept that up for maybe a year - 2 years later, horrible hazardous smoke conditions here for 10 days and I fell apart. I haven't gotten over it yet. 🙄

Currently taking Ramapril (blood pressure) 5 mg twice a day

Omeprazole 10 mg AM and 20 mg PM  (the taper has gone nowhere after the first cut)

Famotidine   once a day (and I still needs tums sometimes)

magnesium 200 mg at night

as of yesterday 2 fish oil capsules "EPA-DHA 1000"

 

off Lexapro as of 5/2018  - last dose had been 5 mg every other day for a couple years

 

highest dose had been 20 mg at which point I was diagnosed with Bipolar II, which went away when I cut the lexapro down to 15 mg. 

 

I spent years on Paxil before Lexapro (can't remember dose), briefly on Effexor and Abilify and others I have forgotten. in fact, when I was diagnoses with BPII I was put on all kinds of things which made me feel so bad I stopped them cold turkey within maybe 3 or 4 weeks, thank goodness. since then I've known these pills were terrible and I weaned down the Lexapro with zero help or support over I'm not sure how many years. 

 

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Mod note:  link to: Happy2Heal: Hope I'm doing this right (Introduction and update topic)   I was just an 18yr old,  a very confused, naive young woman, er no- more of a child, really-

sorry I didn't see this sooner you are very welcome. I remember in the early days of WD/recovery, how very much I needed to hear hopeful stories so I decided at that time, that if were to ma

Hello all! I hope this finds everyone well or at least well on the way to feeling well   I totally forgot to celebrate my 3 year post zero day, it's come and gone and life is moving along,

Hello all!
I hope this finds everyone well or at least well on the way to feeling well ;)

 

I totally forgot to celebrate my 3 year post zero day, it's come and gone and life is moving along, a few rough patches here and there (that's life and probably not anything to do with WD recovery) but mostly things are good, calm, peaceful, and content.

 

I almost wonder, sometimes,  if I am too content. I used the energy that I got from the massive anxiety of WD to push me to do things I probably would never have done otherwise. It literally forced me to grow and to change and to find new ways to do things.

Don't get me wrong, it's wonderful not having that anxiety and dread (and often frank panic and fear) Just Wonderful! 

I hate to add a "but"... SO you know what? I won't.

 

What I will say is that for as bad as WD was, I no longer feel angry that I didn't know about how bad it could be, that we were not warned about how hard these drugs are to get off of. I am grateful that it gave me the opportunity to make some much needed changes in my life.

 

I am making better choices now, about what things and what people I have in my life. I pay more attention to what the outcome is of my choices.

I have one bad habit that still needs work, I confuse being respectful of other people's feelings (and my own) with feeling responsible for them (as well as lapsing into thinking others are responsible for my feelings- they are not!) 

I think maybe it's something a lot of people do? 

 

I see folks on social media attacking others and I think that they are coming from a place of being afraid or angry or sad about things that are happening-  but instead of saying what they feel, they lash out at the people or group of people they think are responsible for what is making them afraid or angry or sad.


It would be so good, I think, if we could all get in touch with our feelings, identify them, acknowledge them, express them and move on to solutions instead of blame.

 

yeh sounds like something out of the mid 60s or early 70's doesn't it? hey that was my generation, what can I say?! 🤣

 

anyway I know I need to keep on top of my feelings, now that I HAVE THEM AGAIN! woot woot! now that I am NO LONGER NUMBED OUT ON DRUGS!

It's messy and it's hard sometimes but it is so much better than not feeling anything or only being vaguely aware of feelings and not able to really connect with them or other people

 

This has opened up a whole new world and life for me and I love it.

 

I just love it.  ❤️ 

 

 

even with covid and losing my job and my super wonderful social life, I've adapted, I'm fine, I'm getting thru it and as it says on many of my t-shirts of the same brand:

LIFE IS GOOD!

 

I hope that life is treating all of you well and that you are on the path to loving yours as well, if not already fully immersed in it.

 

 

 

 

 

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
  • Nov. 2020, loving life ❤️ 
 
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JackieDecides
On 11/20/2020 at 1:20 PM, Happy2Heal said:

I confuse being respectful of other people's feelings (and my own) with feeling responsible for them (as well as lapsing into thinking others are responsible for my feelings- they are not!) 

I think maybe it's something a lot of people do? 

 

most of us - maybe all of us! 

 

 

On 11/20/2020 at 1:20 PM, Happy2Heal said:

It's messy and it's hard sometimes but it is so much better than not feeling anything or only being vaguely aware of feelings and not able to really connect with them or other people

 

 

I'm glad.

 

we really can adjust to a lot of BS including our current situation with covid. I'll bet things get better, if not this winter then next year some time.  and if/when you can go back to work imagine how much you will appreciate it! 

 

 

Currently taking Ramapril (blood pressure) 5 mg twice a day

Omeprazole 10 mg AM and 20 mg PM  (the taper has gone nowhere after the first cut)

Famotidine   once a day (and I still needs tums sometimes)

magnesium 200 mg at night

as of yesterday 2 fish oil capsules "EPA-DHA 1000"

 

off Lexapro as of 5/2018  - last dose had been 5 mg every other day for a couple years

 

highest dose had been 20 mg at which point I was diagnosed with Bipolar II, which went away when I cut the lexapro down to 15 mg. 

 

I spent years on Paxil before Lexapro (can't remember dose), briefly on Effexor and Abilify and others I have forgotten. in fact, when I was diagnoses with BPII I was put on all kinds of things which made me feel so bad I stopped them cold turkey within maybe 3 or 4 weeks, thank goodness. since then I've known these pills were terrible and I weaned down the Lexapro with zero help or support over I'm not sure how many years. 

 

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  • 2 weeks later...

Hi happy2heal,

 

Glad to hear you doing so well. 

 

I was wondering if you could let me know how your sleep is going?

Is it relatively normal now? and how was the progression over the years?

 

Thanks :)

6.01.20 - 6.02.20: Seroquel/Quetiapine 25mg

7.02.20 - 13.02.20: Attempted CT ran into extreme rebound insomnia

13.02.20 - 04.07.20Reinstated and holding Seroquel/Quetiapine 13.5mg, 1mg Circadin 

Began Tapering of Seroquel

04.07.20 - Seroquel/Quetiapine 13mg 12.07.20 - Seroquel/Quetiapine 12.5mg 20.07.20 - Seroquel/Quetiapine 12mg 28.07.20 - Seroquel/Quetiapine 11.5mg

02.08.20 - Seroquel/Quetiapine 11.mg 06.08.20 - Seroquel/Quetiapine 10.5mg 10.08.20 - Seroquel/Quetiapine 10mg 15.08.20 Seroquel/Quetiapine 9.5mg

18.08.20 Seroquel/Quetiapine 9mg 23.08.20 Seroquel/Quetiapine 8.527.08.20 Seroquel/Quetiapine 8mg 31.08.20 Seroquel/Quetiapine 7.75mg02.09.20 Seroquel/Quetiapine 7.5mg 06.09.20 Seroquel/Quetiapine 7.25mg 08.09.20 Seroquel/Quetiapine 7mg12.09.20 Seroquel/Quetiapine 6.75mg14.09.20 Seroquel/Quetiapine 6.5mg 19.09.20 Seroquel/Quetiapine 6.25mg 21.09.20 Seroquel/Quetiapine 6mg 24.09.20 Seroquel/Quetiapine 5.75mg 01.10.20 Seroquel/Quetiapine 5.5mg 03.10.20 Seroquel/Quetiapine 5.25mg 05.10.2020 Seroquel/Quetiapine 5mg 09.10.2020 Seroquel/Quetiapine 4.75mg 12.10.2020 Seroquel/Quetiapine 4.5mg 14.10.2020 Seroquel/Quetiapine 4.25mg 17.10.2020 Seroquel/Quetiapine 4mg 21.10.2020 Seroquel/Quetiapine 3.75mg 24.10.2020 Seroquel/Quetiapine 3.5mg 1.11.2020 Seroquel/Quetiapine 3 mg 7.11.2020 Seroquel/Quetiapine 2.5 mgs 13.11.2020 Seroquel/Quetiapine 2 mg 16.11.2020 Seroquel/Quetiapine 1.5 mg 20.11.2020 Seroquel/Quetiapine 1.25mg 23.11.2020 Seroquel/Quetiapine 1mg 26.12.2020 Seroquel/Quetiapine 0.75mg 16.01.2020 Seroquel/Quetiapine 0.5mg

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8 hours ago, senseless said:

Hi happy2heal,

 

Glad to hear you doing so well. 

 

I was wondering if you could let me know how your sleep is going?

Is it relatively normal now? and how was the progression over the years?

 

Thanks :)

 

Hi there!

my sleep is pretty darn good for an "older" woman (almost 65) who was on many many medications for over 4 decades, thanks for asking!

(sleep needs decrease as you age, so it's hard to compare how much and how well I sleep now to how I did when I was in my 20's LOL)

I sleep as much as I need to and if I have an off night (not common) I am able to make it up the  next night or take a nap the next day.  


Good sleep was the last thing to really heal, as it seems to be for a lot of folks. 


For me, over the period of withdrawal, it got progressively better rather slowly but I never went back to an earlier period of severe insomnia, 

that is to say, it was always on a positive trend, never went backwards

 

I can't tolerate caffeine at all but that's ok, it's a stimulant and I don't need any of that in my life. I no longer miss the taste of coffee and have some herbal teas that satisfy so it's all good. :)

 

 

I see you're getting off of seroquel, I was on  high doses (300 to 600mgs per day)  of that for a few years.... but at the same time, I was on ADs so when I CTed off the seroquel, the AD may have buffered the WD. I did have an uptick in anxiety and I did have trouble falling asleep for awhile but that didn't last too long.  

for me, the lexapro was the hardest to get off of.

 

I hope that your recovery goes smoothly and that you're *living your best life* :)  soon!! 

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
  • Nov. 2020, loving life ❤️ 
 
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  • Moderator

Just wanted to thank you  : thank you for bringing light, for offering positivity, for showing us healing ❤️

Healing news are so important in our community, I'm really glad you kindly took the time to let us know !

And you just offered me a nice smile and a new feeling of hope !

2006 : 20mg Paroxetine + Bromazepam(no specific dose) (2008 : cold turkey of both)

2010 : 20mg Deroxat + Bromazepam

2013: Switch from Bromazepam To Prazepam (longer half-life)

2014-June2017 : Prazepam taper, 3% drops. 

2018 to August 2019 : Paroxetine 20mg taper (3% every 15 days).

- 22nd August updosed To 10mg (was at 8.4mg)

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paroxetine. 

April 2020-August 2020 : Paxil to Prozac bridge. Details https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/21457-erell-struggling-with-paroxetine/?do=findComment&comment=499847

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate/ fish oil/ evening primrose oil 

Current medication :  7mg Fluoxetine + toothpick Paroxetine (since 20 Aug 2020) + 1mg Diazepam (since 29 Aug 2020)

 

Website : https://selibererdelapsychiatrie.wordpress.com/

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  • 4 weeks later...
On 12/4/2020 at 11:31 AM, Erell said:

Just wanted to thank you  : thank you for bringing light, for offering positivity, for showing us healing ❤️

Healing news are so important in our community, I'm really glad you kindly took the time to let us know !

And you just offered me a nice smile and a new feeling of hope !

sorry I didn't see this sooner

you are very welcome.

I remember in the early days of WD/recovery, how very much I needed to hear hopeful stories so I decided at that time, that if were to make it out the other side ok, I would make sure I stuck around to let ppl know that there IS a light at the end of that very long very dark tunnel.

 

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
  • Nov. 2020, loving life ❤️ 
 
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  • 4 weeks later...

Happy New Year a few weeks late!

 

things are going well.... but I've noticed some little things that have changed and I wonder now if I had extremely mild WD/recovery symptoms off and on even since feeing totally healed....

 

For instance, I can no only tolerate being alone, I now feel like I need alone time, which is the way I was  I am before WD way back in 2015 or so.

But when acute WD hit, I really could not tolerate being alone, which turned out to be a blessing in disguise, because that forced me to get something I'd never had: a social life ROFL

 

now, with covid and all, that social life is mostly gone, and I had a hard time adjusting and accepting it, but lately, I have actually preferred being home and working on hobbies and spending time with my pets and cooking and stuff. I have invites to play cards with a few select folks (our "pod") but often prefer to stay home.


I will enjoy going to the Sr Center when it finally re opens but I don't think I'll go back to working there 5 days a week. 

I will be 65 soon and will be able to audit some college classes for free, looking forward to that!

 

in general, I am still enjoying my life very much.

 

Grateful for the mild winter we're having and so many other things...

 

I quit therapy and that was a good decision.

I quit wanting some people in my life to be different, to change, and that was a super good thing to do LOL 
I have to remind myself the only person I can change is ME

I either decide to accept ppl as they are or I don't, and then move on.

 

none of that is related to WD though. 

 

 

sadly, I did not win the recent MEGA million lottery however I did get a free ticket and enjoyed imagining what I would do with all that money so it's a win-win if you ask you me 😂

 

 

 

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
  • Nov. 2020, loving life ❤️ 
 
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11 hours ago, Happy2Heal said:

in general, I am still enjoying my life very much.

 

I'm glad things are going well.  will you be getting the covid vaccine?

 

I just had my second shot this past week and now I have no excuse not to start job hunting again which I dread, but I really need a new job and that will mean relocating again.

 

but Spring is coming! 

 

 

Currently taking Ramapril (blood pressure) 5 mg twice a day

Omeprazole 10 mg AM and 20 mg PM  (the taper has gone nowhere after the first cut)

Famotidine   once a day (and I still needs tums sometimes)

magnesium 200 mg at night

as of yesterday 2 fish oil capsules "EPA-DHA 1000"

 

off Lexapro as of 5/2018  - last dose had been 5 mg every other day for a couple years

 

highest dose had been 20 mg at which point I was diagnosed with Bipolar II, which went away when I cut the lexapro down to 15 mg. 

 

I spent years on Paxil before Lexapro (can't remember dose), briefly on Effexor and Abilify and others I have forgotten. in fact, when I was diagnoses with BPII I was put on all kinds of things which made me feel so bad I stopped them cold turkey within maybe 3 or 4 weeks, thank goodness. since then I've known these pills were terrible and I weaned down the Lexapro with zero help or support over I'm not sure how many years. 

 

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33 minutes ago, JackieDecides said:

 

I'm glad things are going well.  will you be getting the covid vaccine?

 

I just had my second shot this past week and now I have no excuse not to start job hunting again which I dread, but I really need a new job and that will mean relocating again.

 

but Spring is coming! 

 

 

so good to hear from you Jackie!

 

I'll get the vaccine when it's my turn, but I missed the cut off for the current phase, you have to be 65 and I wont' be 65 til Feb 1st :P

 

the wait list is very long, ppl who are 65 and up,  are being scheduled out into late March and beyond. :( Not enough vaccine and not enough ppl to give the shots. 

 

oh  a new job, how exciting!! have you found an area that you'd like to live in?  

 

Yes spring is coming!! Looking forward to it!

I have gotten a bit chubby during the "lockdown" :P one thing about working every day at the Sr Center, I got out 5 days a week. I wasn't always happy about it, but it was good for my waistline, that's for sure. 

Now I'm a slug. I just don't move around much in the winter 🙄

 

 

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
  • Nov. 2020, loving life ❤️ 
 
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double post (?) :(

 

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
  • Nov. 2020, loving life ❤️ 
 
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@Happy2HealI have read your success story.  I may have read it and responded in the past, but I'm still in significant WD, and my memory is not good.  You are a real inspiration to me!  I, too, am in your age group, and was on AD's 15 years when I decided to get off.  I'm now 98.7% off of them, and still having issues.  So, I come here to read success stories to encourage me and give me hope.  Yours gave me such hope!  It's tempting to worry that I will never recover during the bad times.  I believe this Lexapro is especially nasty stuff - I've heard too many bad stories about it.  Keep up the good work!  Jennifer 

Lexapro   Started Apr 15 02 - 10 mg; Jan 19 20  0.2 mg;  Apr 2  0.18 mg; Jul 16  0.17 mg, Aug 23  0.16 mg, Oct 7  0.15 mg, Nov 8 - 0.14, Jan 16 '21 - 0.13

Trazodone.  used 50 mg once every 4-7 days for sleep, stopped

Xanax. used 0.5 mg once every 4-7 days for sleep, stopped

Benadryl 50 mg, Ibuprofen 800 mg, or Tylenol 1000 mg

other meds: Levothyroxine 75 mg

suppl AM: fish oil, flax oil, multivitamin, vit C, vit E, calcium

suppl PM: magnesium 350 mg, GABA 750 mg, Estroven, melatonin 3 mg, calcium

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37 minutes ago, getofflex said:

@Happy2HealI have read your success story.  I may have read it and responded in the past, but I'm still in significant WD, and my memory is not good.  You are a real inspiration to me!  I, too, am in your age group, and was on AD's 15 years when I decided to get off.  I'm now 98.7% off of them, and still having issues.  So, I come here to read success stories to encourage me and give me hope.  Yours gave me such hope!  It's tempting to worry that I will never recover during the bad times.  I believe this Lexapro is especially nasty stuff - I've heard too many bad stories about it.  Keep up the good work!  Jennifer 

Hi @getofflex

 

I think maybe you have, my memory isn't great either LOL it's that older age thing I guess 

 

yes I have been on dozens of different drugs spanning 4 decades+ 

and lexapro was hands down the most difficult one to get off of-

BUT it most definitely can be done :)

 

 

 

I had those dark days when I thought I might be doomed, that I wouldn't fully recover (although for some reason I was always sure I'd recover to a point)  and now here I am....

and it's great.

 

You'll make it too. and I will celebrate with you and for you when you write your success story!! 🌞

 

 

 

 

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total)
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. I tried to get off it several times. WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". Crashed in Sept, reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, current age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content 
  • Nov. 2020, loving life ❤️ 
 
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@Happy2Healthank you for your kind words!  Your support means a lot, because no one in my real life gets this at all.  But that's OK I don't think you could understand it unless you went through it. 

Lexapro   Started Apr 15 02 - 10 mg; Jan 19 20  0.2 mg;  Apr 2  0.18 mg; Jul 16  0.17 mg, Aug 23  0.16 mg, Oct 7  0.15 mg, Nov 8 - 0.14, Jan 16 '21 - 0.13

Trazodone.  used 50 mg once every 4-7 days for sleep, stopped

Xanax. used 0.5 mg once every 4-7 days for sleep, stopped

Benadryl 50 mg, Ibuprofen 800 mg, or Tylenol 1000 mg

other meds: Levothyroxine 75 mg

suppl AM: fish oil, flax oil, multivitamin, vit C, vit E, calcium

suppl PM: magnesium 350 mg, GABA 750 mg, Estroven, melatonin 3 mg, calcium

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4 hours ago, Happy2Heal said:

lexapro was hands down the most difficult one to get off of-

@Happy2Heal This is what I've been reading on this site. I have just recently started my BMS taper.....I don't know what the future holds for my symptoms, but I am very thankful there are other people that "get me" and are going through (or have been through) the same thing! 

2005 Started Antidepressants to help with sleep

2005-2017 on and off Paxil, Zoloft, Lexapro, and others that I can't remember

2017 Lexapro 10 mg

2018 Jan-Tried getting off lexapro. (within about a 4-6 week period) 

2018 March- Got back on Lexapro 10mg

2018 June Switched to Wellbutrin. (don't remember dosage)

2018 August Switched to Sertraline. 25 mg, 50, 75, then back down to 50 

2019 October Off Sertraline 

2019 December...back on Sertraline 25 mg 

2020 January-switched back to Lexapro 5 mg

2020 March-December Lexapro 10 mg

2021-Jan-begin BMS taper with 2 wk hold

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