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  • Mentor
1 minute ago, Rosetta said:

I’m happy to see you are doing so well, Happy!!

 

🦋Rosetta

thanks Rosetta!!

how are you doing?


I was just about to update my signature a bit, now that we are 1/4 of the way thru  2021 lol

 

 

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total) 
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. First attempt to get off it was 2007- WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". felt ok until  Sept, then acute WD hit!!  reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well. 
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content
  • Dec 2023 Loving life! ❤️ with all it's ups and downs ;) 
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I’m ok, thanks.  It’s still quite bumpy.  Hot flashes, night sweats and poor sleep are keeping me tired and confused.  Today, I feel quite good as I slept better the last two nights.

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

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I’m going to “like” your last post on my thread.  You will get a notification.  I think it may say “somebody” liked your comment but won’t indicate that it was me.  I keep getting likes from “somebody,” and it’s freaking me out.  I’m guessing that it has to do with the way the site is set up — that likes are anonymous, and there is not some person calling himself “somebody.”

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

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  • Mentor
1 hour ago, Rosetta said:

I’m going to “like” your last post on my thread.  You will get a notification.  I think it may say “somebody” liked your comment but won’t indicate that it was me.  I keep getting likes from “somebody,” and it’s freaking me out.  I’m guessing that it has to do with the way the site is set up — that likes are anonymous, and there is not some person calling himself “somebody.”

hi Rosetta,

I guess it's obvious I spend too much time on FB, where I normally "react" to someone's post both to show support and also to remind myself that I've already read it

 

I don't get any notices when ppl react to my posts and I have no idea what happens on SA when I react to someone's post, except that next to heart where you "like" the post, it shows a number (for the number of likes the post got, I'm assuming)   I do it to show support. I  apologize if this is causing an issue for anyone. 

 

I think on FB it tells you who reacted to your post and what their reaction was, I don't know if that happens here on SA

 

 

 

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total) 
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. First attempt to get off it was 2007- WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". felt ok until  Sept, then acute WD hit!!  reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well. 
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content
  • Dec 2023 Loving life! ❤️ with all it's ups and downs ;) 
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  • Mentor

@Rosetta

 

I just looked around the site to see if I could find these notifications you mentioned and I did find them and there was one that says that "somebody" reacted to your post

 

I don't see any notifying me of any reactions however.

 

I really don't know how all that works, I only check notifications when I'm here for other reasons, and even then, not all the time. I can't recall if I've ever seen one notifying me of anything except a response to a post on my thread

 

 

 

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total) 
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. First attempt to get off it was 2007- WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". felt ok until  Sept, then acute WD hit!!  reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well. 
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content
  • Dec 2023 Loving life! ❤️ with all it's ups and downs ;) 
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No apology necessary.  If you liked my post, then you were the “somebody.”  That explains the mystery!  Thanks.

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

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On 4/21/2021 at 9:12 AM, Happy2Heal said:

sweet!!

 

are you still not getting sufficient hours where you've been working?

 

I hope you find a sunny place!! 

 

 

ironically, almost as soon as I was hired by the second job - I haven't started yet but will this upcoming week - my first job got extremely busy and I have gotten overtime for only the second time since I've been here. feast or famine, lol! 

 

 

Currently taking Ramapril (blood pressure) 5 mg twice a day

Omeprazole 10 mg AM and 20 mg PM  (the taper has gone nowhere after the first cut)

Famotidine   once a day (and I still needs tums sometimes)

magnesium 200 mg at night

as of yesterday 2 fish oil capsules "EPA-DHA 1000"

 

off Lexapro as of 5/2018  - last dose had been 5 mg every other day for a couple years

 

highest dose had been 20 mg at which point I was diagnosed with Bipolar II, which went away when I cut the lexapro down to 15 mg. 

 

I spent years on Paxil before Lexapro (can't remember dose), briefly on Effexor and Abilify and others I have forgotten. in fact, when I was diagnoses with BPII I was put on all kinds of things which made me feel so bad I stopped them cold turkey within maybe 3 or 4 weeks, thank goodness. since then I've known these pills were terrible and I weaned down the Lexapro with zero help or support over I'm not sure how many years. 

 

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  • Mentor
30 minutes ago, JackieDecides said:

ironically, almost as soon as I was hired by the second job - I haven't started yet but will this upcoming week - my first job got extremely busy and I have gotten overtime for only the second time since I've been here. feast or famine, lol! 

 

 

oh wouldn't you know it?!?!  

are you feeling better over all? did you see, I can drink regular tea now with caffeine? I am so happy about that, not because I need or want the caffeine but because regular tea is a LOT cheaper than the herbal stuff ;)

 

I hope things continue to get better and better for you!

 

after the past few years for many of us here on SA and the past year in general for everyone around the globe, we could all use a break!

 

 

 

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total) 
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. First attempt to get off it was 2007- WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". felt ok until  Sept, then acute WD hit!!  reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well. 
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content
  • Dec 2023 Loving life! ❤️ with all it's ups and downs ;) 
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On 4/24/2021 at 6:39 AM, Happy2Heal said:

are you feeling better over all? did you see, I can drink regular tea now with caffeine?

I am, I still have both insomnia and anxiety but with Spring the depression got a lot better. and I am so happy for you drinking the less expensive tea. 

I can drink regular coffee but not a lot and not strong. when I over-do I am sorry.

 

so, yes feeling better overall. got vaccinated and Spring came! 

Currently taking Ramapril (blood pressure) 5 mg twice a day

Omeprazole 10 mg AM and 20 mg PM  (the taper has gone nowhere after the first cut)

Famotidine   once a day (and I still needs tums sometimes)

magnesium 200 mg at night

as of yesterday 2 fish oil capsules "EPA-DHA 1000"

 

off Lexapro as of 5/2018  - last dose had been 5 mg every other day for a couple years

 

highest dose had been 20 mg at which point I was diagnosed with Bipolar II, which went away when I cut the lexapro down to 15 mg. 

 

I spent years on Paxil before Lexapro (can't remember dose), briefly on Effexor and Abilify and others I have forgotten. in fact, when I was diagnoses with BPII I was put on all kinds of things which made me feel so bad I stopped them cold turkey within maybe 3 or 4 weeks, thank goodness. since then I've known these pills were terrible and I weaned down the Lexapro with zero help or support over I'm not sure how many years. 

 

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  • 1 month later...
  • Mentor

Just a little update on my tea with caffeine trial, I think it has made my sleep more fragile so I am going back to the more expensive herbal tea

 

It could just be that I've been in some pain physically and don't move around enough during the day to get sleepy enough at night.

My sleep has become quite broken and I am feeling very tired early in the evenings but unable to sleep

 

I'm going to make a concerted effort to get out early in the mornings for a walk and not use the excuse about the weather, which is a favorite excuse of mine LOL I tend to want the most "perfect" day to justify getting my butt going, I have become quite lazy since the start of the pandemic.

 

I am starting to be aware of those nights when I dream and on those nights I wake up feeling good.
I want to do whatever I can to have more of those nights, even if it means dragging my sorry butt out of bed and out the door for a quick walk! 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total) 
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. First attempt to get off it was 2007- WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". felt ok until  Sept, then acute WD hit!!  reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well. 
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content
  • Dec 2023 Loving life! ❤️ with all it's ups and downs ;) 
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I have no doubt caffiene affects your sleep. it does mine for sure. 

Currently taking Ramapril (blood pressure) 5 mg twice a day

Omeprazole 10 mg AM and 20 mg PM  (the taper has gone nowhere after the first cut)

Famotidine   once a day (and I still needs tums sometimes)

magnesium 200 mg at night

as of yesterday 2 fish oil capsules "EPA-DHA 1000"

 

off Lexapro as of 5/2018  - last dose had been 5 mg every other day for a couple years

 

highest dose had been 20 mg at which point I was diagnosed with Bipolar II, which went away when I cut the lexapro down to 15 mg. 

 

I spent years on Paxil before Lexapro (can't remember dose), briefly on Effexor and Abilify and others I have forgotten. in fact, when I was diagnoses with BPII I was put on all kinds of things which made me feel so bad I stopped them cold turkey within maybe 3 or 4 weeks, thank goodness. since then I've known these pills were terrible and I weaned down the Lexapro with zero help or support over I'm not sure how many years. 

 

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  • Mentor
On 6/4/2021 at 1:28 AM, JackieDecides said:

I have no doubt caffiene affects your sleep. it does mine for sure. 

it's funny that it didn't seem to affect it at all at first

I guess if I'm tired enough, even caffeine wont' keep me awake but WOW what a huge change since I stopped drinking it!
 

my sleep is so much more restful now


Now when I wake up, I throw some clothes on and go out for a walk. That perks me up and makes the rest of the day go so much better.

 

no caffeine needed!!

 

 

 

 

 

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total) 
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. First attempt to get off it was 2007- WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". felt ok until  Sept, then acute WD hit!!  reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well. 
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content
  • Dec 2023 Loving life! ❤️ with all it's ups and downs ;) 
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Hi, Happy.  Good luck living caffeine free.  I have no doubt that’s better.  I drink decaf.  Maybe I should stop and see what happens.

I’m glad to see you are doing so well.  I have been doing quite a bit better the last month or so.  It’s nice.  I’m still pretty lethargic and weak, but I feel better overall.  There are a number of things I could do to improve, I’m sure.  Take care, R

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/16629-rosetta-ct-may-2011-too-fast-taper-feb-2017/?page=25

2001-2011 Celexa 10 mg raised to 40 mg then 60 mg over this time period

May 2011 OB Doctor's Cold switch Celexa 60 mg to 10 mg Zoloft sertraline (baby born)

2012-2016 - Doctors raised dose of Zoloft up to 150 mg

2016 - Xanax prescribed - as needed - 0.5 mg about every 3 days (bad reaction)

2016 - Stopped Xanax

Late 2016- Began (too fast) taper of Zoloft

Early 2017 - Trazodone prescribed for bedtime (doseage unknown)

Feb 2017 - Completed taper/stopped Trazodone

Drug free since Feb 2017

2017 - Unisom otc very rarely for sleep

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  • 3 weeks later...
  • Mentor

WoW where has the time gone!
I can see from my signature that I am just about 3-4 mos shy of being off ADs for FOUR YEARS!!

yeeeha!! LOL

 

I am surprised to find that more  healing is still happening.

Less surprised that I did have a short but intense wave- POSSIBLY- or possibly it was simply PTSD from the whole WD experience, hard to tell when you've got PTSD :P

 

I was in an extremely stressful situation, taking on too much and in fact much more than I wanted to, and once I was able to extract myself from that situation, I was fine. But during the course of a few weeks, I was having difficulties quite reminiscent of WD symptoms- sleeplessness, early morning cortisol jolts, feeling depressed and/or anxious early in  the day, exhausted but unable to relax, just totally on edge. trouble thinking, concentrating etc. I mean stress alone can cause all these things, right? it was just that the pattern was so much like WD: things were bad in the morning, were ok around noon and I sometimes actually felt great at night time (although maybe that's because I managed to make it thru a tough day, who knows LOL)

 

in any case, the healing that continues is primarily physical. I lost a lot of wt during WD, and also a lot of hair. My skin became very dry and super sensitive. I couldn't seem to regulate my body temperate very well-  when it was cold, I couldn't warm up, esp. I went from sweating profusely to not being able to sweat at all!

 

now, all of those things are evening out. I am no longer super sensitive to temperature extremes, my body handles them fine.

My hair!!! I can't believe it finally grew back! :):)
I was worried that my thinning hair was due to aging but apparently not, because it's BAAACK!! and I am loving it!!

 

My skin is not as sensitive any more, and while it's a tiny bit more fragile and thin due to age, it's not dry any more.

 

My digestion is more normal now. I just feel more like my old self physically. 

 

My memory is better overall too. 

 

I am pleased to find that things continue to improve. Esp when I thought that they were as good as they could ever possibly get!! 

 

 

 

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total) 
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. First attempt to get off it was 2007- WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". felt ok until  Sept, then acute WD hit!!  reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well. 
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content
  • Dec 2023 Loving life! ❤️ with all it's ups and downs ;) 
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  • Moderator Emeritus
1 minute ago, Happy2Heal said:

I am pleased to find that things continue to improve. Esp when I thought that they were as good as they could ever possibly get!! 

Oh WoW, such an amazing update @Happy2Heal, thank you, thank you for taking the time to share !

It is so amazing to read this for those who are still in the middle of their journey, sounds like it is worth it 💪☺❤

 

Congratulations dear inspirational soul, so well deserved !

2006 : 20mg Paxil+Bromazepam. 2008 : cold turkey of both. 2010 : Reinstatement 20mg Paxil + Bromazepam.

2014-June2017 : Switch from Bromazepam to Prazepam, slow taper to 0mg.

2018 to August 2019 : Paxil 20mg taper (3% every 15 days). 22 Aug 2019 updose to 10mg (was at 8.4mg).

25th Sept 2019 To April 2020 : found SA, holding at 10mg Paxil. 

April 2020 : Paxil 10mg to Prozac 7mg bridge. Details topic/21457

 

Current Supplements : magnesium citrate + fish oil

Current medication :

* 7pm Diazepam  : 0.85mg (15 Aug 2022) / 0.95 mg (24 April 2022) / 1mg Diazepam (since 29 Aug 2020)

* 8am Prozac : 6.16mg (25 oct 2022, feel awful, slight updose) / 6.08 mg (9 oct 2022) / 6.24mg (11 July 22) / 6.44mg (22 May 22) / 6.64mg (4 Nov 21) / 6.72mg (8 oct 21) / 6.8 mg (15 Sept 21)6.88mg (14 Aug 21)/ 6.92mg (23 Jun 21)

 

I am not a professional, I don't give medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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  • Mentor
3 hours ago, Happy2Heal said:

WoW where has the time gone!
I can see from my signature that I am just about 3-4 mos shy of being off ADs for FOUR YEARS!!

yeeeha!! LOL

 

I am surprised to find that more  healing is still happening.

Less surprised that I did have a short but intense wave- POSSIBLY- or possibly it was simply PTSD from the whole WD experience, hard to tell when you've got PTSD :P

 

I was in an extremely stressful situation, taking on too much and in fact much more than I wanted to, and once I was able to extract myself from that situation, I was fine. But during the course of a few weeks, I was having difficulties quite reminiscent of WD symptoms- sleeplessness, early morning cortisol jolts, feeling depressed and/or anxious early in  the day, exhausted but unable to relax, just totally on edge. trouble thinking, concentrating etc. I mean stress alone can cause all these things, right? it was just that the pattern was so much like WD: things were bad in the morning, were ok around noon and I sometimes actually felt great at night time (although maybe that's because I managed to make it thru a tough day, who knows LOL)

 

in any case, the healing that continues is primarily physical. I lost a lot of wt during WD, and also a lot of hair. My skin became very dry and super sensitive. I couldn't seem to regulate my body temperate very well-  when it was cold, I couldn't warm up, esp. I went from sweating profusely to not being able to sweat at all!

 

now, all of those things are evening out. I am no longer super sensitive to temperature extremes, my body handles them fine.

My hair!!! I can't believe it finally grew back! :):)
I was worried that my thinning hair was due to aging but apparently not, because it's BAAACK!! and I am loving it!!

 

My skin is not as sensitive any more, and while it's a tiny bit more fragile and thin due to age, it's not dry any more.

 

My digestion is more normal now. I just feel more like my old self physically. 

 

My memory is better overall too. 

 

I am pleased to find that things continue to improve. Esp when I thought that they were as good as they could ever possibly get!! 

 

 

Great update! I am glad to hear you are still noticing improvements!!! 

I follow The Plant Paradox lifestyle by Dr.Gundry. This lifestyle has given me my life back and I feel better than I have ever felt in my life. It has enabled me to finally get off of this medication and truly live my life. Nutrition is the key to health!!!!! 

2008 to 2019  - 20 mg Paroxetine

Attempted 2 CT's around the 5-6 year mark. Were absolutely terrible and reinstated. Was never explained by the doctor the seriousness of the short half life of this drug. 

2017 - Attempted a tapered discontinuation of this drug and reinstated after being unsuccessful.

2019 - Feb. 12 - After a three month taper I am off of paroxetine. The 3 months were terrible, awful withdrawal feelings. I followed the doctors guidelines for the reduction of this drug and now know it was way too fast. 
2019 - Oct. 12 - 8 months off paroxetine. 75% improvement since coming off the drug. Definitely have had tons of challenges along the way. Let’s go!!!! 

2021 - Feb. 12 - 24 months off paroxetine. I have minor challenges now. Tinnitus/Headaches are still around but are reduced by a massive amount. 

 

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  • Mentor
15 hours ago, Happy2Heal said:

But during the course of a few weeks, I was having difficulties quite reminiscent of WD symptoms- sleeplessness, early morning cortisol jolts, feeling depressed and/or anxious early in  the day, exhausted but unable to relax, just totally on edge. trouble thinking, concentrating etc. I mean stress alone can cause all these things, right? it was just that the pattern was so much like WD: things were bad in the morning, were ok around noon and I sometimes actually felt great at night time (although maybe that's because I managed to make it thru a tough day, who knows LOL)

OMG: yes yes and yes. I too went thru 2 stressful situations recently and only after the second one kinda resolved did I dip into the high cortisol mornings where I literally could feel the chemicals coursing through my blood — today was especially rough. Difficult, really impossible, to focus or concentrate. But by 6pm the chemical feeling had dissipated and I did one hour of work. I kept telling myself, “you’re okay, you’re safe” when the anxiety got too high. So, you are so right @Happy2Heal: healing is still happening. And maybe without drugs to numb those (awful) sensations I’ll always be a bit more sensitive to stress. So be it! No regrets for going off. 
 

Glad to hear from you @Happy2Heal — you sound so good! That your hair grew back is fantastic.

Edited by FarmGirlWorks
  • Prozac | late 2004-mid-2005 | CT WD in a couple months, mostly emotional
  • Sertraline 50-100mg | 11/2011-3/2014, 10/2014-3/2017
  • Sertraline fast taper March 2017, 4 weeks, OFF sertraline April 1, 2017
  • Quit alcohol May 20, 2017
  • Lifestyle changes: AA, kundalini yoga

 

"If you've seen a monster, even if it's horrible, that's evidence of divinity." – Damien Echols

 

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@Happy2Heal @FarmGirlWorks

 

Hi,

 

Can i confirm with yous please....

 

You are success stories? But still have waves?

 

Before withdrawal i didnt have any head pressure or morning Cortisol etc...

 

Im hoping a success is the day you wake up feeling fresh and ready to bounce the day.

May 2016 - Aug 2016 - Prozac 20mg

 

March 2017 - June 2017 - Sertraline 100mg. Horrific withdrawal 5 m onths.

 

July 2017 - Aug 2017 - Mirtazapine 15mg. Horrific.

 

August 2017 - December 2017 Fluoxetine 10mg for 2 weeks ghen Escitalopram 20mg for 12 weeks. Never felt normal since this. Or baseline.

 

March 2018 - June 2018 - Escitalopram 5mg for 12 weeks. Stopped and here i am full of symptoms i never had.

 

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Hi @Leo1983: good question. I considered it a success when all the physical symptoms disappeared for 3-4 months including the dastardly head pressure (it will go away, acupuncture helped). Also the constant SI. The Wave or whatever was brought on by my father dying, my mother going off the deep end,  and a traumatic trip. Life still happens and sometimes intensely. I haven’t been through any of these experiences and def not sober (I quit drinking at the beginning of WD). My body is struggling but it already seems better 😀

 

(This is @Happy2Heal’s thread, so I’m gonna tap out)

  • Prozac | late 2004-mid-2005 | CT WD in a couple months, mostly emotional
  • Sertraline 50-100mg | 11/2011-3/2014, 10/2014-3/2017
  • Sertraline fast taper March 2017, 4 weeks, OFF sertraline April 1, 2017
  • Quit alcohol May 20, 2017
  • Lifestyle changes: AA, kundalini yoga

 

"If you've seen a monster, even if it's horrible, that's evidence of divinity." – Damien Echols

 

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  • Mentor
On 6/30/2021 at 2:29 AM, Leo1983 said:

@Happy2Heal @FarmGirlWorks

 

Hi,

 

Can i confirm with yous please....

 

You are success stories? But still have waves?

 

Before withdrawal i didnt have any head pressure or morning Cortisol etc...

 

Im hoping a success is the day you wake up feeling fresh and ready to bounce the day.

Hi @Leo1983,

I am not sure if what I just went thru was a wave, or PTSD or just a normal but hard time, to be honest. I mention that it could potentially be a wave just to let people know that while things are good, you are going to have challenges in life even after you've recovered from WD

 

but having a hard time here and there is pretty normal, don't you think? I don't have the horrible symptoms of WD any more, those are long gone

 

and the skills I learned while going thru WD recovery have helped me to cope with the every day ups and downs of life

 

I usually do wake up feeling fresh and read to bounce the day!! I like how you put that!!

:)

 

 

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total) 
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. First attempt to get off it was 2007- WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". felt ok until  Sept, then acute WD hit!!  reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well. 
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content
  • Dec 2023 Loving life! ❤️ with all it's ups and downs ;) 
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I really needed to read this today, I too hope I can get to we’re you are. Congratulations on being free 🍀

1995 started Paxil 20mg slowly increasing to 50mg until 2014

-2014 I decided to tapper myself not knowing how too and crashed , DR added 50mg Seraquel

-2015 tried tapering again and crashed

 

Started Tapering Both drugs at the same time 6% per month doing daily micro-taper 

Guided by Mark Horowitz

24/09/23  14.47mg Seroquel.  16.19mg Paxil 

27/11/23.  12.13mg. Seroquel.   13.85mg Paxil

 

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On 6/29/2021 at 7:35 AM, Happy2Heal said:

I am pleased to find that things continue to improve. Esp when I thought that they were as good as they could ever possibly get!! 

 

I'm so glad for you! 

Currently taking Ramapril (blood pressure) 5 mg twice a day

Omeprazole 10 mg AM and 20 mg PM  (the taper has gone nowhere after the first cut)

Famotidine   once a day (and I still needs tums sometimes)

magnesium 200 mg at night

as of yesterday 2 fish oil capsules "EPA-DHA 1000"

 

off Lexapro as of 5/2018  - last dose had been 5 mg every other day for a couple years

 

highest dose had been 20 mg at which point I was diagnosed with Bipolar II, which went away when I cut the lexapro down to 15 mg. 

 

I spent years on Paxil before Lexapro (can't remember dose), briefly on Effexor and Abilify and others I have forgotten. in fact, when I was diagnoses with BPII I was put on all kinds of things which made me feel so bad I stopped them cold turkey within maybe 3 or 4 weeks, thank goodness. since then I've known these pills were terrible and I weaned down the Lexapro with zero help or support over I'm not sure how many years. 

 

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  • 1 month later...
  • Mentor
On 7/10/2021 at 6:35 PM, JackieDecides said:

 

I'm so glad for you! 

thanks Jackie, how are you doing?

 

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total) 
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. First attempt to get off it was 2007- WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". felt ok until  Sept, then acute WD hit!!  reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well. 
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content
  • Dec 2023 Loving life! ❤️ with all it's ups and downs ;) 
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  • Mentor

it feels like it's time for another little update

 

things continue to go well, and while I've said this before, I will say it again because it is true:

there have been more improvements, in things I didn't expect

 

Now, for those who may be reading this and are at the beginning or even the middle of your withdrawal journey, my saying this may make you nervous. You might be thinking, wow, she's been off meds for nearly 4 yrs, and she's still having issues????

 

no, it's not like that at all, believe me. During WD recovery, things were bad, in fact things were very bad for me from 2013 and got much worse in 2016, in fact, roughly from early autumn of 2016 to early autumn of 2017 will probably (hopefully!) be remembered as the absolute WORST year of my life. and even during that terrible things, things were getting better, much slower than I would have liked, but I was always seeing improvement.

 

I felt almost totally healed for the next couple of years, still needing to be careful with my sensitive CNS but overall living a great life. Sleep could be fragile at times but I never suffered from the lack of it, I just wished it was easier to stay asleep.

Thru-out that period, from 2017 to Jan 2020, it was hard to tell if any of these lingering extremely mild issues were WD related, or PTSD related, or simply age related... we do change as we age! 

 

I did have a few brief and but not too bad waves during that time when under stress but honestly, don't let that you scare you! they were extremely mild and short lived, NOTHING at all like early WD symptoms. More like annoyances than anything else.  Take a good look at my drug history: I was on many many psych drugs for over 4 decades, it's a miracle they didn't make me into a total zombie permanently.  I consider myself lucky that I was able to realize, thru the drugged out fog I was in, that these drugs WERE the problem and that I needed to get off them. & I am so glad I did!

 

 

 

By 2020 I declared myself 100% healed but I was wrong. Mentally, emotionally, yes I was totally healed as far as I can tell, but there were some very minor physical issues that I had attributed to age, that I'm pleased to report, are NOT age related at all!

I was having some minor temp dysregulation: the cold bothered me more than it ever had before in my life, and  I didn't seem to sweat any more, so the heat bothered me more too. I would not be able to tolerate a hot shower, that I used to love- it used to relax me. I was like Goldilocks and the 3 bears, everything needed to be "just right".

I thought this was due to my age (I'm 65.5yrs old)

I also had very dry skin and my hair was thinning badly

 

well, I no longer have ANY problems with temperature  dysregulation at all! I don't care for being too cold or too hot but my body is tolerating temp extremes without me feeling like I'm going to pass out from the heat or freeze to death when it's cold. I do have a small extra layer of fat on me that was covid's gift to me (gained about 15lbs, lost 5 of it recently, but still 10lbs heavier than I was in 2019)

I think I need that little extra, I don't know

My skin isn't dry any more either and my hair grew back in, as I reported earlier!

 

my skin used to be super sensitive, as well, and that's no longer the case.

 

I can also fall asleep easily whenever I want to (assuming I'm actually tired of course) That's great! as most folks going thru WD recovery know, that lack of sleep and difficulty getting good rest is gets old real fast!

 

I do have some PTSD from childhood stuff and some PTSD related to WD, but the WD related PTSD has faded and continues to fade the more time passes.

The more distance I have between me and that awful year of 2016-2017, the less I can recall of how bad it was and the fewer bad feelings I have when something reminds me of it.

 

I have filled the time since then making new memories, really good ones!

 

so here I am coming up on my 4 year anniversary of being totally drug free and I am just so glad that I did this.

I never imagined I could have the full and busy and happy life I have now

 

I try not to waste time thinking about how this might have been possible if I'd only realized sooner that the drugs were the problem, because I'm 65 after all and time doesn't stop for anyone. I want to make the most of all the time I have left. so not time for regrets!!

 

I hope this finds you all doing better each day. and if you are having a bad day please remember: It's only TEMPORARY

good days are ahead for you too.

 

 

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total) 
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. First attempt to get off it was 2007- WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". felt ok until  Sept, then acute WD hit!!  reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well. 
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content
  • Dec 2023 Loving life! ❤️ with all it's ups and downs ;) 
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7 minutes ago, Happy2Heal said:

I try not to waste time thinking about how this might have been possible if I'd only realized sooner that the drugs were the problem, because I'm 65 after all and time doesn't stop for anyone. I want to make the most of all the time I have left. so not time for regrets!!

I can't figure out how to edit a post but there's a word missing here!
it's supposed to say, This might have been possible SOONER or earlier in my life... if I'd only realized that drugs were my problem.

 

there's also another sentence with an extra unneeded word, please just ignore it

 

I have a vision problem totally unrelated to WD and It makes me miss words and sometimes whole sentences

 

:P

 

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total) 
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. First attempt to get off it was 2007- WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". felt ok until  Sept, then acute WD hit!!  reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well. 
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content
  • Dec 2023 Loving life! ❤️ with all it's ups and downs ;) 
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@Happy2Heal

 

It's so amazing to know many of the very physical symptoms you earlier attributed to your age were actually WD-related and resolved over time. I do get a great deal of energy from your posts and updates and they do make my vision and hope for the future drug-free of my life much stronger and sharper. I'm going through bad WD symptoms not to mention Nortriptyline's exclusive side effects. I'm now down to 10 mg from a hundred and have been tapering for 2 years now and believe will continue this journey at least for another 3 years. So excited to see you enjoying every bit of your life now taking your revenge on the WD-filled life you endured in the past. Keep thriving. 🌷🌷🌷

-2015 september zoloft (20 mg updosed to 125) plus clonazepam for anxiety and panic attacks

2016 Jan replaced clonazepam with chlorodiazpoxide 20 mg

-2016 April cold turkeyed both after a urinary retention surgery with no withdrawal symptom at all

-2018 Jan perscribed Nortriptyline 10 mg for vestibular vertigo 

-2018 Feb due to the horrible side effects which my psychiatrist took for depression and anxiety, Nortriptyline began to be updosed to reach 100 in June

-2018 Oct noticed I wasexperiencing no pleasure in life and decided to taper(zombie-style kind of life)Tapered to fast to reach 50 mg in 2019 Feb

-Terrible withdrawal symtoms began to creep up, had to updose to 75 in June 2019

-Began to make changes in diet and lifestyle and tapered again to reach 30 by 2020 Jan

-(using Brassmonkey method from here on)By May 2020 reached 22.5 when my whole taper process hit the wall due to infection to God-damned Covid 19. Late Sep 2020 restarted my taper 16 mg in Jan 2021, Jan 2021 to Feb down from 16mg to 14.5mg,Feb to March 13mg,March to July had to hold on 13mg due to being sold counterfeit drugs, took me a while to find out and get a new batch and get back on track again,July to August 11.5 mg,August to Sep 10.5 mg,Sep to Oct 9.5 mg, Jan 2022 started the water solution Nori, had to hold for a few months due to the horrible side effects of Covid shots, restarted taper on June 2022, March 2023(now) 1.8 mg (deem myself 60 to 70 percent recovered and functional)

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@Happy2Heal 

  I am so relieved to see that we can  heal from a long history of physic meds ....

As I am sure you can a test to the fear of" will I be able to survive without these drugs"  Is this depression I'm feel in wd going to ever go away or am I really unhealthy.   Like you, had we known all the other times we tried to go off and crashed and then the "oh no I must need these to survive", we could have said NO we don't. All the wd symptoms now remind me so much of all the other times.....

Please remind me to be patient and let the healing happen❤️

And a huge Thank you for sticking around to help the rest of us searching for the strength and encouragement to keep putting one foot in front of the other.❤️

2 hours ago, Happy2Heal said:

You might be thinking, wow, she's been off meds for nearly 4 yrs, and she's still having issues????

no, it's not like that at all, believe me.

 

Also Thank you for letting us know that you are seeing improvements still, but you were not in awful pain the whole 4 years..  This gives us hope that even it it takes a longer time to heal then we like,  It is reassuring that slowly things get better. ❤️

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/24894-greatful-is-this-withdrawal-or-to-many-med-changes-at-once/

1995? Prozac,  tried several Paxil, Serzone, St John's Wart back to Prozac and Trazodone ct:d Traz

 Lexapro. Tried to stop Crash in 2015  Kindled   Hospitalized, Vybrid, Seroquel, Effexor, Abilify  Pristiq, Wellbutrin-- 2016  ended back on   Prozac and Lamictal 200mg

5/2020  thru 12/2020 taper from 20mg  Prozac  down to 3mg.  Crashed  12/13/2020 Zoloft 50mg 1/29ct  1/29/2021 Seroquel 50mg ct  2/12/2021 Wellbutrin 75mg.  Became hypo manic 2/1  6ct Trazodone 50mg 4/25  25mg 2/5/ 2021 Lamictal 150mg.  2/24  100mg   4/9  75mg   4/21 37.5 

2/16/2021 Seroquel 50xr  3/3 100mg  3/17  150mg  side effects ct   4/3 2021 Lexapro 5mg  4/14  7.5mg  4/30 10mg  5/10  7.5mg 

2021/ 5/16  5mg Lexapro   37.5 Lamictal   25mg trazadone,   xanax  .0625mg  3x a day   

Lexapro  Taper> Sept/01/2021  4.90mg>  Sept/25  4.75mg>   Oct/19 4.69mg > Nov/14 4.2mg    Jan/30/2022-- Split dosing 2x a day All liquid  4.2mg  (2.20mg at 8am & 2mg at 4pm) 2/17 4mg>  2/24  3.8mg  slow taper to  Aug/12/2022 2.04mg  2023> 2mg,  1.90mg, 1.80mg, 1.70mg, 1.5mg, 1.4mg, 1.3mg 1.2mg, 1.1mg, 1mg, 0.9mg, 0.8mg, 0.7mg 0.65mg, 0.6mg, 0.55mg, 0.5mg, 0.45mg, 0.4mg, 0.35mg, 0.3mg, 0.25,mg, back to once a day dosing 0 .1mg, 0.07mg

Lamictal  taper  4/17/ 2022 25mg, 9/9/ 22 -20mg, 9/25/22- 15mg , 10/20/22-   0

 Trazodone..2023.>down to 14mg, 7mg, 6mg  July 2023   0

Xanax  0.0625 3 x a day,  2023>  0.042 3x a day

Supplements  Magnesium glycinate, Omega 3, D3, vitamin c , zinc, NAC 

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  • 3 weeks later...

@Happy2Heal it is so encouraging to see recovery stories like yours. I was on lowest dose of Zoloft for just few weeks …., bad adverse reaction but kept taking under doctor “s encouragement… constant suffering for 10&1/2 months now …. Thank you for giving me hope with ur recovery 

Aug. 16-17, 2020, cipralex: went CRAZY! Recovered in 24hrs

Aug.28,2020; 3.5 weeks 25mg sertraline/4.5 weeks taper

Oct. 25: Last dose (4mg)

Symptoms while on zoloft

DPDR/out of my body/soul despair/feeling dead; tinnitus/no appetite; fear, anxiety/panics

4 months OFF: soul despair, anxiety/fear, brain disconnection/ DPDR, brain feels swollen-numb/crazy/bedridden barely functioning, tinnitus, eye lid twitches; face spasms. Feeling slightly better after 10pm.

- sleep & appetite are fine

9 months OFF: hell, no windows, same symptoms as above  (only eye and face twitches have stopped) plus intense arm/shoulder pain and visual issues. Tinnitus replaced by head buzzing. 

10 months-1 year: all above plus Insomnia (out of nowhere), depression, no peace of mind (mental Akathisia); 2.5mg melatonin

14months off: sleep resumed. All rest symptoms remain. Bedridden vegetable all day. DP is relentless. 

1.5 years off: still severely disabled, not much changed except some improvement in vision.

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@Happy2Heal

 

Your success story has brought me much comfort and reassurance!

 

At 46 months out I find myself in a massive wave (almost as bad as in acute WD but not quite, if you know what I mean 😉) Stories like yours give me the hope I so badly need atm.

 

Thank you for being here for us all❣️

Effexor XR 75mg 1997-2012 

Effexor XR 37.5mg 2012-2017 (tapered off over six months - finished taper July 2017)

SCA Aug 12th, 2017

Cymbalta 30mg Aug 2017 - Nov 2017 (CT Nov. 17th for medical reasons)

Metoprolol 50mg Aug 2017 - Feb 2019 tapered down to 25mg June 2019 then tapered down to zero. Off Metoprolol as of Jan 2020        

Amiodarone (anti-arrhythmic med) 200mg Nov 2017- May 2018

Supplements: Omega 3, vitamin D3, magnesium

What helps me: Manual lymphatic drainage massage, acupressure, meditation, homeopathy (my psychiatrist is also a certified homeopath), a healthy diet when possible organic, yoga, walking my dogs every day and gardening.

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  • 4 weeks later...
  • Mentor

@Iman thanks for stopping by! You have a lot of patience! You are so smart to be going slow and steady the way you are. You will get to the end, most likely with a lot less symptoms than those of us who rushed things, had. It will likely be a huge relief and a very happy day when you get to zero!

 

@Greatful  Hi there friend, thank you for your kind words. You know, actually I did not worry about surviving without the drugs but probably because I realized that the drugs WERE the problem. I could look back and see how each new added drug gave me side effects that led to me being given more drugs; each time I was taken off a drug, I had withdrawal symptoms that were diagnosed as relapse or as a new worse illness, it just snowballed.

 

I was worried that maybe I'd suffered permanent damage but that does not seem to be the case. I have mild short term memory loss but so do all my friends, I think that's my age (and possibly also stress, I have a somewhat stressful life due to having severe PTSD and being quite poor, but I am nonetheless happy or at least content most of the time) 

anyway, no I was definitely not suffering for 4 yrs, I had one really bad year and everything else has been quite manageable. 

 

the tiny improvements I am seeing from time to time are like the icing on the cake. Totally surprising that I can fee even better, when I think life is so darn good already!! :)

 

@JesusSavemefromWD oh you will make it thru this. It is hard but you are what, 9 mos out now? you should likely be seeing some improvement soon if you haven't already. Be watching for it. While everyone is different, nearly everyone gets better in a gradually in time, and a few people report feeling bad for some months and suddenly feeing a LOT better, with more improvement coming after that.

Try to focus on the good things in your life, it will help you pass the time more pleasantly and it can even help you heal. 

 

@gentlehermione  oh dear, so sorry to hear of your wave!  Did something happen, was there some stress in your life that precipitated this wave, or did it come out of the blue? I hope it is very short lived, if not already over.

I have found that after a wave, I am tossed ashore in a much much better place than I ever expected; I pray this is the same for you. 

I am glad that my story helps some.

 

❤️

 

 

 

 

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total) 
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. First attempt to get off it was 2007- WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". felt ok until  Sept, then acute WD hit!!  reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well. 
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content
  • Dec 2023 Loving life! ❤️ with all it's ups and downs ;) 
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@Happy2Heal

thank u for ur encouragement, I am almost a year out….. do u really think I will heal despite being totally debilitated for almost a year now? Adverse reactions seem hard to heal from what I read from this and other sites. I felt my brain exploding when I went on Zoloft and once I quit I spiraled into a dark deep depersonalization, and Akathisia and OCD added at about 2.5 months off. I have literally lost my mind ,,., thank u again ….,so glad to see u out of this hell, u so much deserve it after so much suffering!

 

Aug. 16-17, 2020, cipralex: went CRAZY! Recovered in 24hrs

Aug.28,2020; 3.5 weeks 25mg sertraline/4.5 weeks taper

Oct. 25: Last dose (4mg)

Symptoms while on zoloft

DPDR/out of my body/soul despair/feeling dead; tinnitus/no appetite; fear, anxiety/panics

4 months OFF: soul despair, anxiety/fear, brain disconnection/ DPDR, brain feels swollen-numb/crazy/bedridden barely functioning, tinnitus, eye lid twitches; face spasms. Feeling slightly better after 10pm.

- sleep & appetite are fine

9 months OFF: hell, no windows, same symptoms as above  (only eye and face twitches have stopped) plus intense arm/shoulder pain and visual issues. Tinnitus replaced by head buzzing. 

10 months-1 year: all above plus Insomnia (out of nowhere), depression, no peace of mind (mental Akathisia); 2.5mg melatonin

14months off: sleep resumed. All rest symptoms remain. Bedridden vegetable all day. DP is relentless. 

1.5 years off: still severely disabled, not much changed except some improvement in vision.

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@Happy2HealI am so happy for you when I read your story. You are so right about focusing on living your life instead of regretting what happened for all those years. We cannot change what has happened, but we can choose how to respond to life in the future. I try to remind myself of that every day, although it is hard. Thank you so much for sharing! 

2020/2021 Imovane (zopiclone) Nov 7.5 mg, 4 Sept 2021 5 mg, 22 Sept 2021 3.75 mg (current dose)

2020/2021 Mirtazapin (30 mg) 16 Dec 2020, 7 Jan 2021 0 mg (ended).

2021 Sertraline 11 Jan 25 mg, 22 Jan 50 mg, 7 Febr 2021 0 mg (ended). 

2021 Olanzapine 13 Jan 2021 5 mg, 2 Febr 0 mg, 9 Febr 2021 5 mg (reinstated), 5 March 0 mg, 2 March 2.5 mg (reinstated), 16 March 0 mg, 30 March 2.5 mg (reinstated), 13 April 0 mg (ended). 

2021 Escitalopram 30 March 5 mg, 5 April 10 mg, 28 April 15 mg, 20 May 10 mg, 18 June 7.5 mg, 7 July 7 mg, 14 July 5 mg, 28 July 0 mg, 7 October 0.25 mg (reinstated), 11 October 0.10 mg (reduced reinstatement dose), 12 October 0.125 mg, 13 October 0.175 mg, 17 October 0.20 mg

Other medications: melatonin 5 mg at night 

Supplements AM: B vitamin, D vitamin, probiotics, turmeric and ginger, omega 3 

Supplements PM: C vitamin, magnesiumbisglycinat, omega 3, l-teanin 

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On 10/8/2021 at 4:31 AM, Happy2Heal said:

 

@gentlehermione  oh dear, so sorry to hear of your wave!  Did something happen, was there some stress in your life that precipitated this wave, or did it come out of the blue? I hope it is very short lived, if not already over.

I have found that after a wave, I am tossed ashore in a much much better place than I ever expected; I pray this is the same for you. 

I am glad that my story helps some.

 

❤️

 

 

@Happy2Heal the wave has somewhat abated but is still present 🙁 I did have some major stress a while back which most likely brought it on. These past six months have been trying but then I've been doing a lot more physically (long walks/hikes, major gardening) than I did a year ago. I'm coming up to four years off (CT for medical reasons) and am beginning to wonder how much longer the healing process is going to take. It's such a long haul... Thanks again for being such an inspiration 🥰

Effexor XR 75mg 1997-2012 

Effexor XR 37.5mg 2012-2017 (tapered off over six months - finished taper July 2017)

SCA Aug 12th, 2017

Cymbalta 30mg Aug 2017 - Nov 2017 (CT Nov. 17th for medical reasons)

Metoprolol 50mg Aug 2017 - Feb 2019 tapered down to 25mg June 2019 then tapered down to zero. Off Metoprolol as of Jan 2020        

Amiodarone (anti-arrhythmic med) 200mg Nov 2017- May 2018

Supplements: Omega 3, vitamin D3, magnesium

What helps me: Manual lymphatic drainage massage, acupressure, meditation, homeopathy (my psychiatrist is also a certified homeopath), a healthy diet when possible organic, yoga, walking my dogs every day and gardening.

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  • Mentor
On 10/10/2021 at 5:20 AM, gentlehermione said:

the wave has somewhat abated but is still present 🙁 I did have some major stress a while back which most likely brought it on. These past six months have been trying but then I've been doing a lot more physically (long walks/hikes, major gardening) than I did a year ago. I'm coming up to four years off (CT for medical reasons) and am beginning to wonder how much longer the healing process is going to take. It's such a long haul... Thanks again for being such an inspiration 

I hope that your wave ends soon and that you end up at a higher level of healing/health

 

it is a long haul, isn't it?

you're doing great, getting thru it. 

Just one day at  a time, right?

 

hang in there, it gets better ❤️

 

 

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total) 
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. First attempt to get off it was 2007- WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". felt ok until  Sept, then acute WD hit!!  reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well. 
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content
  • Dec 2023 Loving life! ❤️ with all it's ups and downs ;) 
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On 10/15/2021 at 2:45 PM, Happy2Heal said:

I hope that your wave ends soon and that you end up at a higher level of healing/health

 

it is a long haul, isn't it?

you're doing great, getting thru it. 

Just one day at  a time, right?

 

hang in there, it gets better ❤️

 

@Happy2Heal

 

Thank you 🥰

Effexor XR 75mg 1997-2012 

Effexor XR 37.5mg 2012-2017 (tapered off over six months - finished taper July 2017)

SCA Aug 12th, 2017

Cymbalta 30mg Aug 2017 - Nov 2017 (CT Nov. 17th for medical reasons)

Metoprolol 50mg Aug 2017 - Feb 2019 tapered down to 25mg June 2019 then tapered down to zero. Off Metoprolol as of Jan 2020        

Amiodarone (anti-arrhythmic med) 200mg Nov 2017- May 2018

Supplements: Omega 3, vitamin D3, magnesium

What helps me: Manual lymphatic drainage massage, acupressure, meditation, homeopathy (my psychiatrist is also a certified homeopath), a healthy diet when possible organic, yoga, walking my dogs every day and gardening.

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  • 3 weeks later...
  • Mentor

oh! my 4 yr anniversary off meds has come and gone!

it was 4 yrs last month.

 

it was a long long journey. I consider 2013 to be the start of it, as that's when I was first determined to get off the meds for good. So that's 8 yrs! I had a lot of false starts but finally made it thru.

 

I'd like to think I'm a whole new person, but.............. I'm the same ol' me, for better or for worse!

 

it's funny, during the worst of WD recovery, I worried I'd never get the "old me" back. Now I *am* back, lol, and I'm like, meh. I'm ok. this is good, I guess.... but....... I need a lot of work still!
LOL
a work in progress, I suppose. 

I try to remember the things I learned during WD recovery, how to stay in the moment and how to be grateful and to remember that everything that I need to get thru a tough time is inside me, but sometimes I forget, or ignore what I know is true, and fall into a hole of self pity when things don't go the way I want them to, etc. 

yep, a  work in progress, that's me.

 

I still have a sensitive nervous system but what it is able to tolerate seems to vary. I can drink coffee sometimes with no ill effects at all! sweet!

But I went on a bit of an emotional rollercoaster after taking a muscle relaxer for a few weeks due to severe jaw/head/neck pain (dental related).  I was nervous about using the muscle relaxer but it made a huge difference in my pain level.

The pain and exhaustion probably contributed to my emotional ups and downs but I think the drug may have made them more pronounced. 

Things are evening out now. 

 


I have not had ANY return to the horrendous WD symptoms of the early days.  I need to say that any time I mention any of the seriously MINOR issues I have now- esp for anyone who is in acute WD and worried about how long it might last. That ended for me LONG long ago!! it only lasted about a year, really. Another year was difficult but definitely tolerable and often quite enjoyable.

so, please don't read this and worry that I'm "still suffering", I'm not!!

 

It makes me laugh to myself (and somewhat *at* myself) to think of the things that I find worth complaining about now, things so minor in comparison to acute WD symptoms that I wouldn't have even noticed them when I was in the thick of it all.

 

so that's about it, really. not much new here. I'm entering a new phase in my life, I'll not be keeping pet rats any longer and am searching for something to do instead. Caring for rats can be pretty intense and it can be a lot of work, but I've been part of a large community of pet rodent lovers and it will feel odd not being an active member any longer.

I need to find something else to do that brings me as much joy and sense of purpose. Don't even know where to begin!

I still have my silly kitty. She will be perfectly happy to have my full and undivided attention LOL

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I feel that I don't have much to contribute to the forum any more. I will probably not be around much. But feel free to reach out if you think I might be able to help you or if you want some encouragement and support

 

❤️

 

 

 

 

  • pysch med history: 1974 @ age 18 to Oct 2017 (approx 43 yrs total) 
  •  Drug list: stelazine, haldol, elavil, lithium, zoloft, celexa, lexapro(doses as high as 40mgs), klonopin, ambien, seroquel(high doses), depakote, zyprexa, lamictal- plus brief trials of dozens of other psych meds over the years
  • started lexapro 2002, dose varied from 20mgs to 40mgs. First attempt to get off it was 2007- WD symptoms were mistaken for "relapse". 
  •  2013 too fast taper down to 5mg but WD forced me back to 20mgs
  •  June of 2105, tapered again too rapidly to 2.5mgs by Dec 2015. Found SA, held at 2.5 mgs til May 2016 when I foolishly "jumped off". felt ok until  Sept, then acute WD hit!!  reinstated at 0.3mgs in Oct. 2106
  • Tapered off to zero by  Oct. 2017 Doing very well. 
  • Nov. 2018 feel 95% healed, age 63 
  • Jan. 2020 feel 100% healed, peaceful and content
  • Dec 2023 Loving life! ❤️ with all it's ups and downs ;) 
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