intothewoods: help converting Provigil / modafinil to liquid for slow taper

[Carmie]

Hi Catherine, 

 

Just wanted to say I’m so sorry you are in such a major wave at the moment. Akathisia is the worst thing ever. 

 

Sending lots of hugs🤗🤗🤗

[India]

“ I always wonder when I hear people committing suicide whether they are on meds, and whether the withdrawals from them gave them so much distress that they committed suicide.”

 

Brian  @ Antidepressant Aware has done a lot of work collating British cases from media and coroners reports. I have had some email correspondence . We discussed Kate Barry , the British photographer and daughter of Jane Birkin who jumped out of her Paris flat, antidepressants found at scene. His own son , a junior doctor, died of an adverse reaction to an acne drug. I know my own initial episode after a rapid drop from 5mg to 0 ( I now think it may have been that) of terror/DR etc.. was so awful I can see why ppl do commit suicide. How any of us have gotten through is nothing short of a miracle. 

 

Sorry you are suffering.

[intothewoods]

Thank you for coming over to my thread, India, and for the kind words. They made my day. 

 

Coincidentally,  last week I began reading your story in your thread -- your prose is heart-stirring and exquisitely precise. I truly hate what you've been through. It is distressing but as you say, we are miraculously here and going forward. 

 

I didn't know about Kate Barry but am leaving Saturday for a two-week sabbatical where I hope to make serious progress on an article that's coming to life. My goal is to convey unmistakably to the average reader what this experience is like, how it's shattered millions of lives, and how easily it could/could have happened to them. It has to matter no matter what their life is like now, just as the new Michael Jackson documentary grips people of all sorts with irrefutable insight. (I've not seen the documentary because I can't watch a large screen for almost a decade but, I see the public reaction.)

 

 

Thank you also for letting me know about Brian and @Antidepressant Aware. You've given me a jump-start to get back on track with this project, with my thread, and now I"m going to finish reading your thread.   

 

Wishing you calmer waters soon. 

 

Catherine 

 

 

 

 

 

[puthappinessfirst]

Popping in. I am so sorry to hear you've been dealing with akathisia. When my doc tried me on Lexapro I got it right away, but didn't know what it was. I remember telling my mom how I was feeling. I put my hand on her chest and started vibrating my hand to demonstrate what I was feeling. I ran laps around our living room because it was too much. Since I have crossed over to Celexa and have been on it for a few months it has reduced in severity immensely, but it's still there, lurking. Mornings are the worst, I agree, as both you and @Carmie know. The cortisol mixed with the tired/low blood sugar/distressed CNS makes mornings not so refreshing. But you'll get through it, as we all will. You're being really strong with a great sense of humor, that will get you everywhere in this process. And also, your writing is beautiful ❤️ 

[intothewoods]

Thanks so much for popping in, puthappinessfirst. I love your screen name and admire the positive spirit behind it and your words. 

 

So the akathisia was instant when you took Lexapro. I hadn't heard of this before but it shows the ferociousness of the meds. Your poor body...I am so sorry. You did make me laugh about running laps around the living room. Oh, the things we have to do for this madness. 🤣  

 

The past few mornings I've been experimenting with running around the house like a hooligan to push through the cortisol explosion. I still stay in the dark, cold room under the covers for the first 30-45 mins, but then make a bolt and dash about. Perhaps will know in a few days if this approach helps, or promotes utter collapse. 😅

 

Either way, your confidence that I will get through it, along with your very encouraging words, are buoying me today and forward. 

 

I look forward to getting to know you and @India better. Am headed to your story and thread too💜.

 

[puthappinessfirst]

Yes, pretty much instant. But I stayed on for 4-5 weeks because the only advice I had at the time was that I needed to ride it out and get past the side effects/bumpiness of starting up new meds. In my heart, I knew better, but I didn't know where else to look. It was also quite confusing because my mood seemed to level out, but the akathisia was horrendous. Now I have "met" many people who have gotten it from Lexapro. It's a very potent, dangerous drug, I've realized. 

 

Also, I love to write as well. But I am a small fish and write for blogs/small websites in the music scene. I've taken a break for a while now, but miss writing about my passions! 

[India]

3 hours ago, intothewoods said:

Thank you for coming over to my thread, India, and for the kind words. They made my day. 

 

Coincidentally,  last week I began reading your story in your thread -- your prose is heart-stirring and exquisitely precise. I truly hate what you've been through. It is distressing but as you say, we are miraculously here and going forward. 

 

I didn't know about Kate Barry but am leaving Saturday for a two-week sabbatical where I hope to make serious progress on an article that's coming to life. My goal is to convey unmistakably to the average reader what this experience is like, how it's shattered millions of lives, and how easily it could/could have happened to them. It has to matter no matter what their life is like now, just as the new Michael Jackson documentary grips people of all sorts with irrefutable insight. (I've not seen the documentary because I can't watch a large screen for almost a decade but, I see the public reaction.)

 

 

Thank you also for letting me know about Brian and @Antidepressant Aware. You've given me a jump-start to get back on track with this project, with my thread, and now I"m going to finish reading your thread.   

 

Wishing you calmer waters soon. 

 

Catherine 

 

 

 

 

 

Thank you Catherine. Synchronicity. I look forward to reading your own story in greater detail, though not your suffering. Your article too.

Not to take things off track. But there have been 134 AD related deaths in the U.K in 2019 alone ( source AntiDepressantAware).

I hope you soon find akathisia relief. 

Have to garner energy for replies but will give more detailed response soon.

 

Much healing energy/light your way.

[intothewoods]

1 hour ago, puthappinessfirst said:

Also, I love to write as well. But I am a small fish and write for blogs/small websites in the music scene. I've taken a break for a while now, but miss writing about my passions! 

That's awesome that you are a music writer. Like @Carmie, I'm a music geek. You're not small fish in any sense (!) I'd love to write for blogs and small websites. I'd never go back to working exclusively or even primarily for larger publications. It's all consuming and after ADWD, would for me risk a relapse. Of course I have to recover first, but you know what I mean. Our bodies are forever sensitized in new ways, it seems. 

 

What kind of music do you write about and most love? I understand not writing at the moment. You can't force art. I've written nothing in ages because nothing is there yet the past few months, it's coming back in short bursts. SA has helped in incredible ways, feeling the pain and struggle but also courage and triumph of so many members -- it has pushed the walls of my mind. 

 

1 hour ago, puthappinessfirst said:

But I stayed on for 4-5 weeks because the only advice I had at the time was that I needed to ride it out and get past the side effects/bumpiness of starting up new meds. In my heart, I knew better, but I didn't know where else to look.

Needing to "ride it out" -- I fell for it too. Thousands still fall for it each month. But one day you'll be a success story. I can feel it. 💪😊

[intothewoods]

15 minutes ago, India said:

Thank you Catherine. Synchronicity. I look forward to reading your own story in greater detail, though not your suffering. Your article too.

Not to take things off track. But there have been 134 AD related deaths in the U.K in 2019 alone ( source AntiDepressantAware).

I hope you soon find akathisia relief. 

Have to garner energy for replies but will give more detailed response soon.

 

Much healing energy/light your way.

Yes, I sensed the synchronicity straight away. Amazing. Thank you for the UK stats. There haven't even been three full months of 2019. Plus you know there are many that go unreported, like with sexual assault. 

 

Healing thoughts to you, too, India. I feel your light. ⭐

[Carmie]

Hi Catherine, my fellow music freak, 🎼😁

 

I look forward to reading your article when it’s finished.📝 It’s nice to have a journalist amongst us. 

 

I’m really sorry your akathisia is so severe, it really is the worst symptom ever, there’s no way of even describing it unless you’ve lived it. 

 

Sending hugs your way🤗

 

 

Edited March 20, 2019 by Carmie
Removed white space

[intothewoods]

Thank you for visiting my thread, @Carmie. You're such an encouragement for us all, not only your sparkly disposition but how far you've traveled on this perilous

highway. When I read your signature and then see where you are today: Incredible. You rock. And I don't say that just because you've come around to grooving on R.EM. lately 🎸 😂. ....Hey, when is your next concert??? I'm so glad you get to hear music live, and out of doors many times in sunny Queensland. It is good for the withdrawal soul. 

 

Hugs from the Florida woods. 💜

 

 

[puthappinessfirst]

20 hours ago, intothewoods said:

That's awesome that you are a music writer. Like @Carmie, I'm a music geek. You're not small fish in any sense (!) I'd love to write for blogs and small websites. I'd never go back to working exclusively or even primarily for larger publications. It's all consuming and after ADWD, would for me risk a relapse. Of course I have to recover first, but you know what I mean. Our bodies are forever sensitized in new ways, it seems. 

 

What kind of music do you write about and most love? I understand not writing at the moment. You can't force art. I've written nothing in ages because nothing is there yet the past few months, it's coming back in short bursts. SA has helped in incredible ways, feeling the pain and struggle but also courage and triumph of so many members -- it has pushed the walls of my mind. 

 

Sounds like we're all 3 some heavy music lovers, so cool! 

 

I honestly love all genres. Electronic, punk, rap, outlaw country, oldies/doowop, pop. I can appreciate almost all of it. When I was writing I was working for alternative music festivals, similar to Coachella and the like. I was always going to the next one, working, writing, photographing the sites. It was a lot of fun. 

[India]

23 hours ago, intothewoods said:

Yes, I sensed the synchronicity straight away. Amazing. Thank you for the UK stats. There haven't even been three full months of 2019. Plus you know there are many that go unreported, like with sexual assault. 

 

Healing thoughts to you, too, India. I feel your light. ⭐

Dear Catherine,

Wanted to just send more healing light. I had a horror of a day with my derealization and what everyone is suffering with here: dysautonomia. It'll be 9 months since I started my descent into hades and that was hard to fathom. But I wanted to check in and feel part of the community. Can't write much more today. Same to Carmie. Thinking of you both. Thinking of everyone here.

 

Knowing I am not alone really helps me get through intolerable times. Sort of like a virgin saint or a religion. The image of a guardian angel of sorts. Surviving Antidepressants, my religion? 

[India]

23 hours ago, intothewoods said:

Yes, I sensed the synchronicity straight away. Amazing. Thank you for the UK stats. There haven't even been three full months of 2019. Plus you know there are many that go unreported, like with sexual assault. 

 

Healing thoughts to you, too, India. I feel your light. ⭐

Yes, totally. This is just the tip of the iceburg. Tragic.

[intothewoods]

1 hour ago, India said:

I had a horror of a day with my derealization and what everyone is suffering with here: dysautonomia. It'll be 9 months since I started my descent into hades and that was hard to fathom. But I wanted to check in and feel part of the community.

 

Dear India, 

You are part of the community and part of us, I am in hades with you, and pained that you have dysautonomia so badly along with dearealization today.  A neighbor visited me a few hours ago and after hearing that she's on Savella and then Cymbalta along with opioids and feels entirely cured by the meds and that surely, I am terribly mistaken in my symptoms -- sweat began pouring profusely, my hip began to jerk, and thus flowed all the symptoms (bladder running wild, heart hammering, hungering for air) and still they flow. Stress is such a trigger and I mention it because I wonder if you have added stress today. If so, we are dealing with the usual suspects (there must be some humor here 😨) and with conditions that will not only abate but ultimately vanish. 

 

Also, my dysautonomia of years substantially abated in October when I evacuated for Hurricane Michael which annihilated most of my area. Only I was gifted with the key to a stranger's beach cottage outside ground zero for a month. In that time, without the pressure cooker I have at home -- I healed miraculously. I had not made any med adjustments for months either. But it didn't account for being able to turn cartwheels on the beach and ride a bike 26 miles. But. As soon as I returned, all came crashing down and then I messed with my meds too quickly before I knew. With SA, that doesn't ever have to happen again. And with SA, we know this nightmare won't last (I'm going to post some excerpts from Rhiannon's recovery that really help me, in the next couple of days). 

 

We also walk away with otherwise unattainable prizes: more strength, courage, endurance, compassion, insight. The world is so rapid-fire and about instant-fixes but we know there isn't such a thing -- ever. 

 

I'm going on sabbatical in three days, then in summer will land in a new place for good, an artsy bungalow I've secured in a cool town. There will be plenty of problems, but we keep working to reduce stress. Thank you for helping to reduce mine today. And thank you, @Carmie, @puthappinessfirst, and @powerback (yes, I'm pulling for you every day, PB. You''re a hero).

 

Peace to all. 

[Carmie]

16 hours ago, intothewoods said:

Thank you for visiting my thread, @Carmie. You're such an encouragement for us all, not only your sparkly disposition but how far you've traveled on this perilous

highway. When I read your signature and then see where you are today: Incredible. You rock. And I don't say that just because you've come around to grooving on R.EM. lately 🎸 😂. ....Hey, when is your next concert??? I'm so glad you get to hear music live, and out of doors many times in sunny Queensland. It is good for the withdrawal soul. 

 

Hugs from the Florida woods. 💜

 

 

 

Hi Catherine, 

 

Yes, YAY for music!! I’m glad you love it too, yes it is good for the withdrawal soul. I know you can only tolerate it for so long, due to too much sensory stimulation. Some people going through withdrawals can’t stand any noise at all, I feel sad that they can’t enjoy music. I know how much you love R.E.M, keep enjoying!🎼😁

 

My next concert is Belinda Davids on the 24th of April. She is from South Africa and does a Whitney Houston show, she’s brilliant. I’ve seen her before, she’s come back to Aussie Land, different venue this time though. You can’t help but stand up and dance.💃💃 

 

Hugs from hot and sunny Queensland 🤗☀️☀️☀️

 

 

 

 

[India]

Only just saw post.

[intothewoods]

@India, it's my glitch as I forgot to put the @ in front of your name. Oh, the pain of brain drain. 😅

 

I landed on my sabbatical last night after long drive and tons of stops. Barely conscious. Rough. Tomorrow is a new day ☀. 

@India

Edited March 27, 2019 by Carmie
Added tag

[Carmie]

23 hours ago, intothewoods said:

@India, it's my glitch as I forgot to put the @ in front of your name. Oh, the pain of brain drain. 😅

 

I landed on my sabbatical last night after long drive and tons of stops. Barely conscious. Rough. Tomorrow is a new day ☀. 

 

Hope your time away is soothing to the soul Catherine, 

 

I know you are barely functional at the moment, sometimes we just have to go into our cocoons, under our blankets, and ride out the storm. 

 

Sending hugs your way🤗

[intothewoods]

Have i mentioned lately I heal at warp-speed bursts with your wisdom and aid? 

 

Will cocoon and ride the cold front coming tonight with storms. So wondrous to be out of massive stress again finally.

 

Thank you @Carmie for the blue bubble for @India. She is amazing and brave. 

 

C ❤️ 

[India]

🌈❤️🌈

[puthappinessfirst]

Hi, my friend.

 

Dropping in to say hello and hope you're well! 

 

❤️

[India]

On 3/21/2019 at 12:05 AM, intothewoods said:

We also walk away with otherwise unattainable prizes: more strength, courage, endurance, compassion, insight. The world is so rapid-fire and about instant-fixes but we know there isn't such a thing -- ever. 

This is such a beautiful and wonderful way of seeing it. In bed all day today. Keep warrioring on.

[intothewoods]

1 hour ago, India said:

Keep warrioring on.

 

Thank you so much, @India. It's a blistering day of symptoms but you just helped me chill. 

 

A good evening to England, fellow warrior. 💪💪

[Carmie]

Hi Catherine, 

 

I know you’re really struggling so much with akathisia. I really feel for you as that really is the worst symptom, everyone whose ever gone through it says so, myself included. You certainly feel like you’re just in survival mode when it’s severe. You are so brave, you little warrior you. 

 

Sending lots of hugs🤗🤗

[intothewoods]

It truly is survival mode, @Carmie. You always know how to define the big picture. With your experience and depth of empathy, you see beyond terminology. When I told my doctor recently that I had akathisia to some degree for three years now, she said "akathisia is just restlessness." I said, no, it's a state of existence in physical and mental terror. It's very complex and all-consuming." 

 

In looking for a good description, I found this fabulous topic:

One of the best descriptions was by @wdtony who said:

 

When it is at its most intense I can barely control myself physically. I had never felt anything like it before traking the SSRI in 2006. It is not nervousness or anxiety. It feels like an intense tickling sensation in my bones and muscles...mostly in my arms and legs but also in every part of my body. I want to bite my fingers because sometimes pain is a wonderful distraction. I pace and this helps. when it is very bad I want to scream and have done so at times. I feel like I am losing control and that my brain is being squeezed. the sensation can come in waves which increase or diminish over a period of time. Sometimes the sensations have lasted for days. I almost always have some sensation of this every day with only short periods of time on "those lucky days" where I can almost feel at ease.

 

The intensity is so great sometimes which offers a window of understanding as to why a person might take action to end their life. I would describe akathisia as something as bad or worse than pain. Not knowing what is causing it or how to find relief makes this physical problem even more frustrating and scary. Out of all of the dozens of horrible sensations I have experienced due to my adverse reaction to Lexapro, akathisia is definitely the worst. It is like having poison ivy on the entire inside of my body and not being able to itch it.

 

This is so good! Brain being squeezed, something as bad as or worse than pain, like having poison ivy inside the entire body and not being able to itch it. 

 

Now I know why I go around constantly rubbing my arms and legs furiously. And that's the key: "now I know why." How would we know without seeing and feeling it here through each other on SA? Like he says, not knowing what is causing it or how to find relief makes it more scary. We don't need more scary. Fear is in full supply with WDs so having some understanding can literally, for many, mean life or death.

 

 

10 hours ago, Carmie said:

You are so brave, you little warrior you. 

 

What a war we fight! And any bravery on my end I owe to fellow SA warriors, for sure you. Your incredible discipline in making lifestyle changes, deciding to limit computer screen time,  set an alarm at 6 a.m. and roust yourself from bed to take a shower in hopes an early rise will help you sleep better at night (it worked!) -- inspiring.  Changing habits aren't the easy ways out of our symptoms but the ones that ensure we win the battles and the war. 

 

Hugs back to you 🤗

[intothewoods]

On 3/27/2019 at 4:10 PM, puthappinessfirst said:

Hi, my friend.

 

Dropping in to say hello and hope you're well!

 

Thanks for dropping by @puthappinessfirst. When I see you've visited, spirits lift 💪. 😊

 

Also my writing brain wonders, as a fellow journalist, what you thought of the New Yorker piece on ADWD that ran last  week https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2019/04/08/the-challenge-of-going-off-psychiatric-drugs.

 

Mainly, from a reporting standpoint, do you feel it helped the WD community? I feel I must be missing something here (I've mentioned some of this to you  ), because the first read and every subsequent read brought on WD waves. It made me sicker. It read like a high-society, indulgent human-interest piece with a newsy medicine spin and some "When Harry Met Sally" sex scenes woven in for sensation. The title promised an article on "The Challenge of Going Off Psychiatric Drugs" yet the story didn't deliver. At least not fully, to me. 

 

I realize it brought awareness and even helped some people find SA. But I didn't feel the author's connection with the horrors of WD, or any real compassion for that matter. It was a recounting of events a la Manhattan and environs. People are dying in WD, suffering for years on end, being prescribed the drugs every day and I can't imagine someone would think twice about a script after reading this piece. I have worked a little with Laura Delano,the subject of the piece, and know her some. It didn't capture her pain nor the way she was lured into the system.

 

But I could be overthinking things as you know. 🤣  (Note to @Altostrata or one of the mods: if I should move this to the media thread, please let me know. Thanks!  )

 

Meanwhile, I hope you're having a "withdrawal normal" day in the California Spring. 🌷🌷

 

Healing thoughts💙

 

Catherine

 

 

[powerback]

On ‎3‎/‎19‎/‎2019 at 6:22 PM, India said:

“ I always wonder when I hear people committing suicide whether they are on meds, and whether the withdrawals from them gave them so much distress that they committed suicide.”

 

Brian  @ Antidepressant Aware has done a lot of work collating British cases from media and coroners reports. I have had some email correspondence . We discussed Kate Barry , the British photographer and daughter of Jane Birkin who jumped out of her Paris flat, antidepressants found at scene. His own son , a junior doctor, died of an adverse reaction to an acne drug. I know my own initial episode after a rapid drop from 5mg to 0 ( I now think it may have been that) of terror/DR etc.. was so awful I can see why ppl do commit suicide. How any of us have gotten through is nothing short of a miracle. 

 

Sorry you are suffering.

Hi @India ,I am always wondering the same .

It always comes down to the person having a " condition" its a situation we can never win . I often wonder about single vehicle car crashes also .we are decades off ever understanding it honestly .I think its way to big to ever be known .bury it for generations .governments are doing it with all aspects of life .democracy is a lie and a farce .

we are at the level of stigma for "mental illness" like  were slavery was a 100 years ago in my opinion .

Its funny that we think were would we be without the discovery of penicillin but yet there's so much iatrogenic  illness ,now that's irony .no laughing matter for anyone caught up in it.

Sorry intothewoods for the hijack .Take care folks .

[intothewoods]

Not a hijack, @powerback. Always a pleasure to have you visit my thread. 

 

15 minutes ago, powerback said:

we are at the level of stigma for "mental illness" like  were slavery was a 100 years ago in my opinion .

Its funny that we think were would we be without the discovery of penicillin but yet there's so much iatrogenic illness ,now that's irony .no laughing matter for anyone caught up in it.

 Agree with all. But just like with slavery, there is right and wrong, good vs evil. We on the good side and as long as we don't give up, we will heal and win. You and @India have suffered so much for so long and I feel this pain every day. It keeps me with my face to the wind, refusing to give up. 

 

Keep fighting! 

 

 

[powerback]

22 minutes ago, intothewoods said:

Not a hijack, @powerback. Always a pleasure to have you visit my thread. 

 

 Agree with all. But just like with slavery, there is right and wrong, good vs evil. We on the good side and as long as we don't give up, we will heal and win. You and @India have suffered so much for so long and I feel this pain every day. It keeps me with my face to the wind, refusing to give up. 

 

Keep fighting! 

 

 

💪🏄‍♂️🙏

[puthappinessfirst]

3 hours ago, intothewoods said:

 

Thanks for dropping by @puthappinessfirst. When I see you've visited, spirits lift 💪. 😊

 

Also my writing brain wonders, as a fellow journalist, what you thought of the New Yorker piece on ADWD that ran last  week https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2019/04/08/the-challenge-of-going-off-psychiatric-drugs.

 

Mainly, from a reporting standpoint, do you feel it helped the WD community? I feel I must be missing something here (I've mentioned some of this to you  ), because the first read and every subsequent read brought on WD waves. It made me sicker. It read like a high-society, indulgent human-interest piece with a newsy medicine spin and some "When Harry Met Sally" sex scenes woven in for sensation. The title promised an article on "The Challenge of Going Off Psychiatric Drugs" yet the story didn't deliver. At least not fully, to me. 

 

I realize it brought awareness and even helped some people find SA. But I didn't feel the author's connection with the horrors of WD, or any real compassion for that matter. It was a recounting of events a la Manhattan and environs. People are dying in WD, suffering for years on end, being prescribed the drugs every day and I can't imagine someone would think twice about a script after reading this piece. I have worked a little with Laura Delano,the subject of the piece, and know her some. It didn't capture her pain nor the way she was lured into the system.

 

But I could be overthinking things as you know. 🤣  (Note to @Altostrata or one of the mods: if I should move this to the media thread, please let me know. Thanks!  )

 

Meanwhile, I hope you're having a "withdrawal normal" day in the California Spring. 🌷🌷

 

Healing thoughts💙

 

Catherine

 

 

 

Hi there ❤️ 

 

In general: yes, I feel like it help the WD community. Not at all to the extent that we'd like or hope, but a little is better than nothing! 

 

Most people don't know about psychiatric drug withdrawal AND we're getting to a point soon here in America where there will be equal parts of the population medicated/unmedicated. People need to know about this, whichever way possible. Hopefully before they encounter their own fiasco. Publications like NYT and the NYer have huge audiences that span a wide range of demographics and I am just happy that the word is getting out, because people won't typically find the fringe sites like SA on their own unless they're in too deep. 

 

BUUUT, I also 100% agree with you that it did not capture the horror that is WD. And it was a long piece! The article may open many people's eyes, but some people still may not connect the dots, so to speak, if they've recently come off of a psych med and are in the throws of WD. Why? Because, like you said, there wasn't enough specific detail about what WD entails, and how every little physical and mental symptom can  potentially be traced back to WDs. It needs to be spelled out for people. It needs to be graphic. No one will know that they're going through WDs if they can't read stories/symptoms that they can relate to. 

 

We're on the right track, we just still have a ways to go. 

 

P.S. If someone makes a movie out of this I swear to heaven's I will spontaneously combust. 

[intothewoods]

42 minutes ago, puthappinessfirst said:

Most people don't know about psychiatric drug withdrawal AND we're getting to a point soon here in America where there will be equal parts of the population medicated/unmedicated. People need to know about this, whichever way possible. Hopefully before they encounter their own fiasco. Publications like NYT and the NYer have huge audiences that span a wide range of demographics and I am just happy that the word is getting out, because people won't typically find the fringe sites like SA on their own unless they're in too deep. 

 

Excellent!!!  @puthappinessfirst, Thank you for bringing my mind around to the reality that we are still just the fringes, that none of us discovered SA until we were in too deep so how could we expect anyone else to? In my quest to be broadminded, I was terribly narrow-minded. It's impossible for the average person to believe this could be as big and bad as it is. In my case, I agreed to over a dozen psych meds before wondering if that was actually helpful. 😬 It's a long journey to the bottom yet as you say, articles like this do hold out hope to others before their own fiascos. 

 

42 minutes ago, puthappinessfirst said:

there wasn't enough specific detail about what WD entails, and how every little physical and mental symptom can  potentially be traced back to WDs. It needs to be spelled out for people. It needs to be graphic. No one will know that they're going through WDs if they can't read stories/symptoms that they can relate to. 

 

Great news, because this is my story approach. It's hard as you know because we don't want to come across as self-pitying whiners. In his book "Death Grip: A Climber's Escape From Benzo Madness," Matt Samet nails this experience with his typical compelling prose but has been criticized as self-indulgent. Knowing how much the man suffered, that he had to fold "Climbing Magazine" that he brought to birth, that he still has relapses into WD years off the meds -- that's not the case. But it's hard for the masses to relate.  

 

42 minutes ago, puthappinessfirst said:

We're on the right track, we just still have a ways to go. 

 

YES!!!!!!

 

42 minutes ago, puthappinessfirst said:

.P.S. If someone makes a movie out of this I swear to heaven's I will spontaneously combust. 

 

 🤣🤣🤣🤣  You always make me laugh! 💜

[India]

Hello everyone, keep fighting. How generous everyone is with their support when everyone is flat out with symptoms . I often feel a lack in terms of what I give here but I so struggle with being able to write. Such a horrid symptom. Especially last few days. I think of everyone battling. Just want to keep connected even if it’s a little paragraph. Thinking of you Catherine and Carmie ! Be in touch in greater detail once i get that moment when my brain manages to compute and say something worthwhile! In the meantime, I keep reading. So I am here in presence, even without an output! I dream of reading our success stories!!!

[India]

1 hour ago, intothewoods said:

But it's hard for the masses to relate.  

This is the crux of it. Ironically , I find ppl associate opiate withdrawal with something horrific ( “Trainspotting” esque) but my friend who went to rehab for opiates says ssri WD is more tortuous and lasts longer. Kelly Brogan too! Honestly, i wish I had an opiate addiction not an SSRI addiction, it’s shorter and there is much more help and recognition of it. The tragedy of this is we suffer and have that suffering denied!  Somehow, it’s about trying to affect the public psyche, who think that ssri is like a paracetamol . They have no idea! I’m also amazed that seemingly intelligent and educated ppl cannot see out of the narrow paradigm fostered by pharmaceuticals and In the UK RCP. I don’t feel anyone in my circle has really engaged or believed my experience. It is so strange to watch it. Ppl seemingly open to all sorts of other forms of counter culture and alternate social theorems. 

[puthappinessfirst]

1 minute ago, India said:

Honestly, i wish I had an opiate addiction not an SSRI addiction, it’s shorter and there is much more help and recognition of it.

 

KNEW I should have picked up heroin instead 🙄

 

*That was a joke.

[India]

5 minutes ago, puthappinessfirst said:

 

KNEW I should have picked up heroin instead 🙄

 

*That was a joke.

Haha. Good, I like to laugh, i’m British. Land of “Fleabag”. 

I meant that WD is shorter with opiates and time ended. PAWS is rarer.