Jump to content
SurvivingAntidepressants.org is temporarily closed to new registrations until 1 April ×

Daisygirlsk: I'm at a total loss and desperate


Daisygirlsk

Recommended Posts

Dec 19 2020

630pm - had supper

830pm - body vibrating very badly, legs are like jello when I walk. Very scared. Dizzy but not as bad as earlier this week.

April 2011 - citalopram 20 mg

April 2018 - tapered in 4 weeks

Nov 2018 - reinstated 20 mg

Stopped 8 days later bad reaction

November 5 2020 - reinstated citalopram 0.5mg. Increase to 1mg

November 10 2020 - stopped citalopram.  

December 8 2020 - reinstate 2.5mg citalopram. Stayed on until December 17

December 20 2020 - discontinue citalopram again 

Dec 2020 - start ativan for akathisia 

Nov 2020 to Jan 2021 - tried low dose Seroquel, Risperidone, Luvox, Zoloft and Prozac. just added symptoms no benefit

Feb 2021 - ativan went paradoxical. landed in hospital. cold turkeyed.

Totally drug free since Feb 21, 2021

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Please post a 24 hour period in one post headed with the day/date.  Otherwise it gets very confusing.  Thank you.

* NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA *

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED:  (6 year taper)      0mg Pristiq  on 13th November 2021

ADs since ~1992:  25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq:  50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity)  Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021   LAST DOSE 0.0025mg

Post 0 updates start here    My tapering program     My Intro (goes to tapering graph)

 VIDEO:   Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus
20 hours ago, Daisygirlsk said:

Hello

I posted notes up to and including yesterday. I was prescribed ativan to take as needed I had no idea it had to be consistent. I lowered citalopram to 1.75mg but it didnt help much. I just want off it

 

Sorry, Daisy, I missed that. 

 

Please keep your signature updated, as this helps a lot in posts being missed as moderators have to re-read a lot (and for many members), so it helps ensure we don't gloss over important information.

 

Please update your benzo use and when you decreased the AD:

 

Account Settings - Create or Update Your Signature

 

Some thoughts:

 

  • you just reduced the AD. Please note it takes 4 days for your nervous system to register a change and it can take several weeks to adapt to that change. 
  • benzos (and all psychiatric drugs) need to be taken at the same time(s) of the day and the same dose. Your nervous system is seeking stability, so constantly changing your drug pattern is, as moderator JanCarol likes to say, "playing basketball with your brain."
  • at the same time you changed your AD, you also added in a new drug - zopiclone. Making more than one change at a time is not recommended. Please see: The rule of 3KIS: Keep it simple. Keep it slow. Keep it stable.

 

On 11/5/2020 at 6:17 PM, Daisygirlsk said:

I was drinking throughout withdrawal which I know is bad, but I have not touched alcohol in two weeks. 

 

Daisy, I just re-read your thread and noticed this. I would be VERY careful about using benzos (like Ativan) and z-drugs (like zopiclone. Alcohol, z-drugs, and benzos all affect the GABA system.  If your GABA system is already damaged by alcohol, benzos can compound the problem. You've only been taking Ativan for a few days. You could do a rapid taper off it. But if you feel that will create a crisis state, then you'll need to continue on with it. 

 

It likely is the alcohol that created more problems for you. This can take a long time to resolve, since your nervous system is already destabilized from antidepressant withdrawal. 

 

If you're going to continue with a benzo, I would stick to it and find the best time(s) of the day to take it. I would stop the zopiclone since you've only taken it one time.

 

Ativan has a very short half-life of 10-20 hours, so some of your symptoms are likely inter-dose withdrawal (going into withdrawal in between doses).  So if you intend to stay on Ativan, you may want to dose at least twice a day. 

 

 

 

Link to comment

Thank you.

I REALLY want to stop the citalopram since I am markedly worse since being back on it. I took 2.5mg for one week and 1.75mg for 2 days following a recommendation on here. Can I just stop it? I honestly would never sleep at all if I didnt take ativan 

April 2011 - citalopram 20 mg

April 2018 - tapered in 4 weeks

Nov 2018 - reinstated 20 mg

Stopped 8 days later bad reaction

November 5 2020 - reinstated citalopram 0.5mg. Increase to 1mg

November 10 2020 - stopped citalopram.  

December 8 2020 - reinstate 2.5mg citalopram. Stayed on until December 17

December 20 2020 - discontinue citalopram again 

Dec 2020 - start ativan for akathisia 

Nov 2020 to Jan 2021 - tried low dose Seroquel, Risperidone, Luvox, Zoloft and Prozac. just added symptoms no benefit

Feb 2021 - ativan went paradoxical. landed in hospital. cold turkeyed.

Totally drug free since Feb 21, 2021

Link to comment

I feel like I am having an adverse reaction to the citalopram

April 2011 - citalopram 20 mg

April 2018 - tapered in 4 weeks

Nov 2018 - reinstated 20 mg

Stopped 8 days later bad reaction

November 5 2020 - reinstated citalopram 0.5mg. Increase to 1mg

November 10 2020 - stopped citalopram.  

December 8 2020 - reinstate 2.5mg citalopram. Stayed on until December 17

December 20 2020 - discontinue citalopram again 

Dec 2020 - start ativan for akathisia 

Nov 2020 to Jan 2021 - tried low dose Seroquel, Risperidone, Luvox, Zoloft and Prozac. just added symptoms no benefit

Feb 2021 - ativan went paradoxical. landed in hospital. cold turkeyed.

Totally drug free since Feb 21, 2021

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus
2 hours ago, Daisygirlsk said:

I REALLY want to stop the citalopram since I am markedly worse since being back on it. I took 2.5mg for one week and 1.75mg for 2 days following a recommendation on here.

 

Daisy, please re-read your thread, especially what the moderators have posted. Going on this high a dose was never something the staff recommended.

 

Nearly two years ago, moderator Gridley wrote:

 

On 1/1/2019 at 2:26 PM, Gridley said:

At 7 months, you are outside the time period (within 3 months) when reinstatement most dependably works.  So it really is unknown whether it will help.  

 

If you decide you want to try, I suggest reinstating 0.5mg as a tester dose to see how you respond.

 

You weren't active long back then. 

 

You took a break from the forum, returning last month.

 

On 11/5/2020 at 7:17 PM, Daisygirlsk said:

I am going to try 0.5mg for a week.  I never had a really bad reaction while on it and I did feel happier in two days.

 

You were struggling and moderator Manymoretodays wrote:

 

On 11/8/2020 at 2:41 PM, manymoretodays said:

And it's been 2 years, since you took Citalopram?  If it were me, I sure would not increase your dose now from 0.5 mg.  And I might keep with that dose, with careful observations for at least a few more days. 

 

And then you increased the dose.

 

On 11/8/2020 at 2:55 PM, Daisygirlsk said:

I did increase to 1mg this morning because I felt so desperate.

 

 

You then reduced it two days later:

 

On 11/10/2020 at 7:59 PM, Daisygirlsk said:

I decided to go back to 0.5mg citalopram instead of jumping off. 

 

You then decided to stop the reinstatement several days later:

 

On 11/13/2020 at 11:06 PM, Daisygirlsk said:

I did stop because it was making me feel way more anxious and very suicidal. 

 

Two weeks later, you reported a full day's window:

 

On 11/29/2020 at 9:40 AM, Daisygirlsk said:

Finally after 2 years of this I had a FULL DAY window yesterday.

 

Then you took a weeklong break from the forum and reported reinstating again at a much higher dose: 

 

On 12/11/2020 at 11:36 PM, Daisygirlsk said:

I'm currently at 2.5 mg citalopram. I've been taking that for 4 days now. The first two days I didnt feel too bad. Yesterday I had insane panic all day and also what I feel is mild akathisia.

 

This decision led to you taking  benzos and likely developing a benzo habit. 

 

Daisy, the staff has worked hard to supply you with information and give you advice, which you have repeatedly ignored. As repeatedly written by multiple staff, it takes 4 days for your nervous system to register a change and then it takes more time to adjust. You'll have to learn to handle being uncomfortable without continuing to make changes if you wish to ever be free of these drugs. 

 

It's your decision if you wish to keep making these random changes, panicking if you have a day or two of symptoms, and making more changes, including adding in more drugs. 

 

But that's not the advice that's been given here. 

 

 

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Daisy, the staff posted this link on the first page of your thread three times. Please read the first post all the way through:

 

 

About reinstating and stabilizing to reduce withdrawal symptoms

 

Also, read the links that are listed at the top of that page:

 

After Reinstating or Updosing, How Long To Stabilize?

Stabilizing after a reduction -- what does that mean?

 

 

 

 

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

And these:

 

Stability

 

Reinstatement

* NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA *

MISSION ACCOMPLISHED:  (6 year taper)      0mg Pristiq  on 13th November 2021

ADs since ~1992:  25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq:  50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity)  Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021   LAST DOSE 0.0025mg

Post 0 updates start here    My tapering program     My Intro (goes to tapering graph)

 VIDEO:   Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi Daisygirlsk,

And where are you at today, yesterday, with medications, and then symptoms?

A good review of past posts should prove helpful, and I'd hate to see you do another jump off the citalopram, and then possible depart, and come on back in another couple of weeks, or month, to tell us about a new drug or addition.

 

Can you frame some of the narratives you are doing into Notes again?

Here is one that you did.

And then do add in any of the non-drug coping practices that you might be trying that help as well.  I think that helps take the focus off of symptoms a bit sometimes.

 

I know you have that early work schedule too, and that's okay I think, as long as for now, you stay as consistent as possible with your sleep/wake hours, even eating and other activities.

 

Do you think this Holiday season is bringing on increased symptoms?  This too, will often pass, without the need for medication changes or additions.

Anything else that might have thrown you lately?  Things like alcohol usage, or excess caffiene, or even emotional interactions ?

 

Okay, and all for me.  Best.....the very best of this season!

L, P, H, and G,

mmt

 

Oh yah, Daisy, remember what we talked about last week......staying consistent for 4-7 days, if possible.  Otherwise, the tendency is that new problems do arise, as your nervous system so attempts to find some balance or homeostasis, while being rocked about with changes and additions in med(s)

Edited by manymoretodays

Late 2023- gone to emeritus status, inactive, don't @ me, I can check who I've posted on, and I'm not really here like I used to be......thanks.

Started with psycho meds/psychiatric care circa 1988.  In retrospect, and on contemplation, situational overwhelm.

Rounding up to 30 years of medications(30 medication trials, poly-pharmacy maximum was 3 at one time).

5/28/2015-off Adderal salts 2.5mg. (I had been on that since hospital 10/2014)

12/2015---just holding, holding, holding, with trileptal/oxcarb at 75 mg. 1/2 tab at hs.  My last psycho med ever!  Tapered @ 10% every 4 weeks, sometimes 2 weeks to

2016 Dec 16 medication free!!

Longer signature post here, with current supplements.

Herb and alcohol free since 5/15/2016.  And.....I quit smoking 11/2021. Lapsed.  Redo of quit smoking 9/28/2022.  Can you say Hallelujah?(took me long enough)💜

None of my posts are intended as medical advice.  Please discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical provider.  My success story:  Blue skies ahead, clear sailing

 

Link to comment

I stopped the citalopram two days ago because it was definitely giving me akathisia. I had a good day yesterday and now today my whole body is vibrating. I want to start fresh and get help from you guys but because I have done everything wrong I understand if you no longer want to help me.

April 2011 - citalopram 20 mg

April 2018 - tapered in 4 weeks

Nov 2018 - reinstated 20 mg

Stopped 8 days later bad reaction

November 5 2020 - reinstated citalopram 0.5mg. Increase to 1mg

November 10 2020 - stopped citalopram.  

December 8 2020 - reinstate 2.5mg citalopram. Stayed on until December 17

December 20 2020 - discontinue citalopram again 

Dec 2020 - start ativan for akathisia 

Nov 2020 to Jan 2021 - tried low dose Seroquel, Risperidone, Luvox, Zoloft and Prozac. just added symptoms no benefit

Feb 2021 - ativan went paradoxical. landed in hospital. cold turkeyed.

Totally drug free since Feb 21, 2021

Link to comment

I literally get no sleep at all without ativan because my brain jolts me awake constantly. I am willing to do whatever you guys tell me at this point. Forgive me for jumping the gun all the time I just get desperate. If you no longer want to help me I totally understand 

April 2011 - citalopram 20 mg

April 2018 - tapered in 4 weeks

Nov 2018 - reinstated 20 mg

Stopped 8 days later bad reaction

November 5 2020 - reinstated citalopram 0.5mg. Increase to 1mg

November 10 2020 - stopped citalopram.  

December 8 2020 - reinstate 2.5mg citalopram. Stayed on until December 17

December 20 2020 - discontinue citalopram again 

Dec 2020 - start ativan for akathisia 

Nov 2020 to Jan 2021 - tried low dose Seroquel, Risperidone, Luvox, Zoloft and Prozac. just added symptoms no benefit

Feb 2021 - ativan went paradoxical. landed in hospital. cold turkeyed.

Totally drug free since Feb 21, 2021

Link to comment

I'm feeling severe akathisia right now what should I do?

April 2011 - citalopram 20 mg

April 2018 - tapered in 4 weeks

Nov 2018 - reinstated 20 mg

Stopped 8 days later bad reaction

November 5 2020 - reinstated citalopram 0.5mg. Increase to 1mg

November 10 2020 - stopped citalopram.  

December 8 2020 - reinstate 2.5mg citalopram. Stayed on until December 17

December 20 2020 - discontinue citalopram again 

Dec 2020 - start ativan for akathisia 

Nov 2020 to Jan 2021 - tried low dose Seroquel, Risperidone, Luvox, Zoloft and Prozac. just added symptoms no benefit

Feb 2021 - ativan went paradoxical. landed in hospital. cold turkeyed.

Totally drug free since Feb 21, 2021

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Please update your signature to reflect your recent changes, both the antidepressant and the continuation of Ativan use. 

 

Are you taking the Ativan regularly?  Same dose and same time(s) of day? 

 

10 hours ago, Daisygirlsk said:

I'm feeling severe akathisia right now what should I do?

 

Akathisia vs restlessness, anxiety, agitation

 

Non-drug techniques to cope with emotional symptoms

 

 

Link to comment

Thank you for responding. I will update my signature asap. I am not taking ativan regularly since it is prescribed to take as needed. If this is something I should definitely either take every day or not at all please let me know. My body vibrations have calmed down tremendously the past couple hours but I just cannot sleep without my head banging me awake every 20 minutes with surges of adrenaline. Should I be posting daily notes still?

April 2011 - citalopram 20 mg

April 2018 - tapered in 4 weeks

Nov 2018 - reinstated 20 mg

Stopped 8 days later bad reaction

November 5 2020 - reinstated citalopram 0.5mg. Increase to 1mg

November 10 2020 - stopped citalopram.  

December 8 2020 - reinstate 2.5mg citalopram. Stayed on until December 17

December 20 2020 - discontinue citalopram again 

Dec 2020 - start ativan for akathisia 

Nov 2020 to Jan 2021 - tried low dose Seroquel, Risperidone, Luvox, Zoloft and Prozac. just added symptoms no benefit

Feb 2021 - ativan went paradoxical. landed in hospital. cold turkeyed.

Totally drug free since Feb 21, 2021

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus
15 minutes ago, Daisygirlsk said:

Should I be posting daily notes still?

 

Yes, please continue posting notes. 

 

16 minutes ago, Daisygirlsk said:

I am not taking ativan regularly since it is prescribed to take as needed. If this is something I should definitely either take every day or not at all please let me know.

 

Yes, it needs to be taken at the same time(s) of the day and at the same dose. 

 

It's unknown if you're dependent or not, but this is what you wrote earlier:

 

On 12/20/2020 at 2:56 PM, Daisygirlsk said:

I honestly would never sleep at all if I didnt take ativan 

 

This sounds like you either are dependent on the drug or adding in the antidepressant at that high of a reinstatement was creating a high level of insomnia. 

 

You either need to (1) take this drug consistently and go into a long hold for several weeks before trying to come off it or (2) stop the drug and use non-drug coping techniques to deal with the insomnia. 

 

We can't tell you what you should do. You'll need to make the decision and then stick to it. By continuing to mess around with these dugs, you're setting yourself up for kindling.

 

Benzodiazepine Kindling

 

Limbic Kindling -- Hardwiring the brain for hypersensitivity

 

 

Link to comment

I will take the ativan regularly and post notes thank you. I believe the insomnia is from the citalopram 

April 2011 - citalopram 20 mg

April 2018 - tapered in 4 weeks

Nov 2018 - reinstated 20 mg

Stopped 8 days later bad reaction

November 5 2020 - reinstated citalopram 0.5mg. Increase to 1mg

November 10 2020 - stopped citalopram.  

December 8 2020 - reinstate 2.5mg citalopram. Stayed on until December 17

December 20 2020 - discontinue citalopram again 

Dec 2020 - start ativan for akathisia 

Nov 2020 to Jan 2021 - tried low dose Seroquel, Risperidone, Luvox, Zoloft and Prozac. just added symptoms no benefit

Feb 2021 - ativan went paradoxical. landed in hospital. cold turkeyed.

Totally drug free since Feb 21, 2021

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus
Just now, Shep said:

Yes, it needs to be taken at the same time(s) of the day and at the same dose. 

 

Daisy, since this is a concept that you're struggling with, I want to make sure you understand what this means. 

 

Ativan has a short half-life of 10 - 20 hours, so some people find they go into interdose withdrawal (withdrawal in between doses). 

 

You can take part of your daily dose at night for sleep and then part of the daily dose in the morning to prevent interdose withdrawal.

 

However, some people find that taking the full dose at night helps so much with sleep that they're able to cope with interdose withdrawal with non-drug coping skills during the day. It's up to you how you want to deal with these symptoms, but just do so consistently. 

 

Since you're taking 1 mg Ativan, you could, for example, take .75 mg at night for sleep and .25 mg in the morning for interdose withdrawal symptoms. If you decide to do this, then you'll need to be consistent in taking the same .75 mg at the same time at night and .25 mg at the same time each morning. 

 

That doesn't mean you won't have symptoms some days. That doesn't mean you won't have insomnia some nights. But you can't keep reaching for a drug when things get tough. This process goes in windows and waves: 

 

The Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization

 

 

Link to comment

I'm assuming that even if I continue regular ativan to function I should stay off the citalopram?

April 2011 - citalopram 20 mg

April 2018 - tapered in 4 weeks

Nov 2018 - reinstated 20 mg

Stopped 8 days later bad reaction

November 5 2020 - reinstated citalopram 0.5mg. Increase to 1mg

November 10 2020 - stopped citalopram.  

December 8 2020 - reinstate 2.5mg citalopram. Stayed on until December 17

December 20 2020 - discontinue citalopram again 

Dec 2020 - start ativan for akathisia 

Nov 2020 to Jan 2021 - tried low dose Seroquel, Risperidone, Luvox, Zoloft and Prozac. just added symptoms no benefit

Feb 2021 - ativan went paradoxical. landed in hospital. cold turkeyed.

Totally drug free since Feb 21, 2021

Link to comment

Thank you for this explanation. I will do the .75 and. 25 thank you. Should I dissolve it in water and draw up? The tablets I have are sublingual 1mg. Should I stay off the citalopram? My nervous system is so messed up

April 2011 - citalopram 20 mg

April 2018 - tapered in 4 weeks

Nov 2018 - reinstated 20 mg

Stopped 8 days later bad reaction

November 5 2020 - reinstated citalopram 0.5mg. Increase to 1mg

November 10 2020 - stopped citalopram.  

December 8 2020 - reinstate 2.5mg citalopram. Stayed on until December 17

December 20 2020 - discontinue citalopram again 

Dec 2020 - start ativan for akathisia 

Nov 2020 to Jan 2021 - tried low dose Seroquel, Risperidone, Luvox, Zoloft and Prozac. just added symptoms no benefit

Feb 2021 - ativan went paradoxical. landed in hospital. cold turkeyed.

Totally drug free since Feb 21, 2021

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus
41 minutes ago, Daisygirlsk said:

Should I stay off the citalopram?

 

Yes. You may have some withdrawal symptoms from it, but continuing to go on and off it also creates problems, along with what looked to be an adverse reaction due to your hyper-sensitive nervous system. 

 

41 minutes ago, Daisygirlsk said:

I will do the .75 and. 25 thank you. Should I dissolve it in water and draw up? The tablets I have are sublingual 1mg.

 

Ativan is not soluable in water. You can only make a suspension, not a solution. This may not be a problem, but for some people who are very sensitive to any dose variance, it might be. Some ideas: 

 

  • Are you able to switch to a prescription liquid form of Ativan? It's not available in all countries, so please check with your pharmacist or doctor. It's much easier to taper off the prescription liquid. It's a concentrated liquid, so when you're ready to taper, you simply add it to water. 

 

  • If the concentrated liquid prescription isn't available, you may want to switch over to a regular tablet and use a pill cutter. You're going to be on this drug for several months to stabilize before you start tapering. The 0.5 mg pill size may be the easiest because you can cut it in half for 0.25 mg increments. 

 

  • The problem with Ativan is it's not soluble in water. You can make a suspension, but not a solution. In order to make a solution, you can use a little vodka to dissolve the drug before adding water (use 2 mL of Vodka for each 1 mg of benzo and then add water.  It's recommended to use at least 80 proof alcohol).

 

If you're not able to obtain the liquid prescription, I would just switch over to a regular tablet and ask for the 0.5 mg tablet size and use a pill cutter. 

 

Since you've only been on Ativan for a week, another option is to crossover to Valium and benefit from the long half life. 1 mg Ativan = 10 mg of Valium, which would only have to be taken once a day since the half-life if up to 200 hours (8 days). 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Link to comment

This is very valuable information thank you. Without knowing better in the past  I dissolved ativan in water and dosed that way to see if it worked like citalopram and I seemed to have no problems when I took it. Could I continue doing this or is it just best to try one of the other methods? Thanks again

April 2011 - citalopram 20 mg

April 2018 - tapered in 4 weeks

Nov 2018 - reinstated 20 mg

Stopped 8 days later bad reaction

November 5 2020 - reinstated citalopram 0.5mg. Increase to 1mg

November 10 2020 - stopped citalopram.  

December 8 2020 - reinstate 2.5mg citalopram. Stayed on until December 17

December 20 2020 - discontinue citalopram again 

Dec 2020 - start ativan for akathisia 

Nov 2020 to Jan 2021 - tried low dose Seroquel, Risperidone, Luvox, Zoloft and Prozac. just added symptoms no benefit

Feb 2021 - ativan went paradoxical. landed in hospital. cold turkeyed.

Totally drug free since Feb 21, 2021

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus
41 minutes ago, Daisygirlsk said:

Without knowing better in the past  I dissolved ativan in water and dosed that way to see if it worked like citalopram and I seemed to have no problems when I took it. Could I continue doing this or is it just best to try one of the other methods?

 

You'll have to decide if you want to deal with measuring two different doses in liquid a day over the next several weeks / months until you stabilize. If so, and you aren't having any problem with it, then it's fine. 

 

There's not a lot out on these forums regarding sublingual doses, so the best path is to see what works for you. 

 

1 hour ago, Daisygirlsk said:

I will take the ativan regularly and post notes thank you. I believe the insomnia is from the citalopram 

 

I just want to verify something. Did you have insomnia prior to the most recent reinstatement of citalopram? 

 

Please re-read your thread and any notes you kept offline. If the insomnia is truly from an adverse reaction to the citalopram, you'll need to weigh the pros and cons of developing a benzo dependency now that you're no longer taking the offending drug. 

 

 

Link to comment

After reading my notes there seems to be a fairly obvious correlation between the citalopram and insomnia. I don't want a benzo dependency but I also am having such a hard time functioning on nearly no sleep. My brain just jolts me awake constantly. Would there be non drug techniques to deal with this and the constant body vibrations? So car ativan is the only thing that helps that. I really dont want to be on any drugs but I'm not sure what else to do. Are there non drug techniques to deal with these horrible night jolts?

April 2011 - citalopram 20 mg

April 2018 - tapered in 4 weeks

Nov 2018 - reinstated 20 mg

Stopped 8 days later bad reaction

November 5 2020 - reinstated citalopram 0.5mg. Increase to 1mg

November 10 2020 - stopped citalopram.  

December 8 2020 - reinstate 2.5mg citalopram. Stayed on until December 17

December 20 2020 - discontinue citalopram again 

Dec 2020 - start ativan for akathisia 

Nov 2020 to Jan 2021 - tried low dose Seroquel, Risperidone, Luvox, Zoloft and Prozac. just added symptoms no benefit

Feb 2021 - ativan went paradoxical. landed in hospital. cold turkeyed.

Totally drug free since Feb 21, 2021

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Tips to help sleep: so many of us have that awful withdrawal insomnia

 

Sleep masks to block out light, keeping a regular bedtime, turning off all electronics several hours before bedtime, etc. can all be helpful. 

 

Melatonin for sleep

 

Please read the first post in the melatonin thread carefully. This is a less-is-more type of supplement. 

 

Also, guided meditations on youtube can be very helpful. You can find thousands of them by googling on youtube.

 

 

 

 

Link to comment

Do these also help with akathisia?

April 2011 - citalopram 20 mg

April 2018 - tapered in 4 weeks

Nov 2018 - reinstated 20 mg

Stopped 8 days later bad reaction

November 5 2020 - reinstated citalopram 0.5mg. Increase to 1mg

November 10 2020 - stopped citalopram.  

December 8 2020 - reinstate 2.5mg citalopram. Stayed on until December 17

December 20 2020 - discontinue citalopram again 

Dec 2020 - start ativan for akathisia 

Nov 2020 to Jan 2021 - tried low dose Seroquel, Risperidone, Luvox, Zoloft and Prozac. just added symptoms no benefit

Feb 2021 - ativan went paradoxical. landed in hospital. cold turkeyed.

Totally drug free since Feb 21, 2021

Link to comment

Dec 22 2020

Up at 5am to teach. Barely slept.

530 - 7am teaching. Window. Did not feel any akathisia or panic.

7am - took .25mg ativan. Slept for 2 hours..also took 200mg magnesium glycinate 

10am - woke up to heart racing. 

10am - 1pm - staying busy at home. Symptoms fairly mild

2pm - went to get some bloodwork and to visit grandma.

3pm - tried half a cannabis gummy indica strain. Did nothing.

5pm - symptoms ramping up.  Trying to distract. Whole body vibrating especially legs and including tongue. Feel a lot of jolting in body. 

9pm - have heating pads on legs which helps a bit. Took pulse and it is 116 resting. 

11pm - go to bed. Feel like I am full of electrical wires. .75mg ativan

 

I feel quite awful. 

April 2011 - citalopram 20 mg

April 2018 - tapered in 4 weeks

Nov 2018 - reinstated 20 mg

Stopped 8 days later bad reaction

November 5 2020 - reinstated citalopram 0.5mg. Increase to 1mg

November 10 2020 - stopped citalopram.  

December 8 2020 - reinstate 2.5mg citalopram. Stayed on until December 17

December 20 2020 - discontinue citalopram again 

Dec 2020 - start ativan for akathisia 

Nov 2020 to Jan 2021 - tried low dose Seroquel, Risperidone, Luvox, Zoloft and Prozac. just added symptoms no benefit

Feb 2021 - ativan went paradoxical. landed in hospital. cold turkeyed.

Totally drug free since Feb 21, 2021

Link to comment
  • Administrator

What has been your Ativan intake over the last week? It sounds like you're getting rebound withdrawal symptoms.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

Link to comment

I've taken it every night 1mg from December 14 to December 21

April 2011 - citalopram 20 mg

April 2018 - tapered in 4 weeks

Nov 2018 - reinstated 20 mg

Stopped 8 days later bad reaction

November 5 2020 - reinstated citalopram 0.5mg. Increase to 1mg

November 10 2020 - stopped citalopram.  

December 8 2020 - reinstate 2.5mg citalopram. Stayed on until December 17

December 20 2020 - discontinue citalopram again 

Dec 2020 - start ativan for akathisia 

Nov 2020 to Jan 2021 - tried low dose Seroquel, Risperidone, Luvox, Zoloft and Prozac. just added symptoms no benefit

Feb 2021 - ativan went paradoxical. landed in hospital. cold turkeyed.

Totally drug free since Feb 21, 2021

Link to comment

I really dont want to be on a benzo though

April 2011 - citalopram 20 mg

April 2018 - tapered in 4 weeks

Nov 2018 - reinstated 20 mg

Stopped 8 days later bad reaction

November 5 2020 - reinstated citalopram 0.5mg. Increase to 1mg

November 10 2020 - stopped citalopram.  

December 8 2020 - reinstate 2.5mg citalopram. Stayed on until December 17

December 20 2020 - discontinue citalopram again 

Dec 2020 - start ativan for akathisia 

Nov 2020 to Jan 2021 - tried low dose Seroquel, Risperidone, Luvox, Zoloft and Prozac. just added symptoms no benefit

Feb 2021 - ativan went paradoxical. landed in hospital. cold turkeyed.

Totally drug free since Feb 21, 2021

Link to comment

Would I have to taper the ativan? I really want to be drug free

April 2011 - citalopram 20 mg

April 2018 - tapered in 4 weeks

Nov 2018 - reinstated 20 mg

Stopped 8 days later bad reaction

November 5 2020 - reinstated citalopram 0.5mg. Increase to 1mg

November 10 2020 - stopped citalopram.  

December 8 2020 - reinstate 2.5mg citalopram. Stayed on until December 17

December 20 2020 - discontinue citalopram again 

Dec 2020 - start ativan for akathisia 

Nov 2020 to Jan 2021 - tried low dose Seroquel, Risperidone, Luvox, Zoloft and Prozac. just added symptoms no benefit

Feb 2021 - ativan went paradoxical. landed in hospital. cold turkeyed.

Totally drug free since Feb 21, 2021

Link to comment

Shep had told me to dose 0.75mg ativan at night and 0.25 in the morning to get through the day. I have done that today. But I do want off this benzo and would rather fully use non drug techniques to cope. I took 1mg ativan at bedtime for 7 days and then today I did 0.25mg this morning and 0.75mg tonight. I will stay on this if I need to now because I have taken it for 8 days. But I would rather just come off. Do I need to taper? I dont want to make sudden drug changes anymore since I have made so many mistakes so please advise thank you. I definitely do not want to aggravate symptoms further 

April 2011 - citalopram 20 mg

April 2018 - tapered in 4 weeks

Nov 2018 - reinstated 20 mg

Stopped 8 days later bad reaction

November 5 2020 - reinstated citalopram 0.5mg. Increase to 1mg

November 10 2020 - stopped citalopram.  

December 8 2020 - reinstate 2.5mg citalopram. Stayed on until December 17

December 20 2020 - discontinue citalopram again 

Dec 2020 - start ativan for akathisia 

Nov 2020 to Jan 2021 - tried low dose Seroquel, Risperidone, Luvox, Zoloft and Prozac. just added symptoms no benefit

Feb 2021 - ativan went paradoxical. landed in hospital. cold turkeyed.

Totally drug free since Feb 21, 2021

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Daisy, it's unclear whether or not you are dependent on Ativan. There's no way to know what symptoms are from the benzo and what symptoms are from the antidepressant withdrawal. 

 

You could do a rapid taper off Ativan, making sure you're off within 2 weeks. That means tapering off over the next 4 days. 

 

It's your decision, but we can't keep going round and round with this. Make a game plan and stick to it. Continuing to bounce around is only going to lead to kindling. 

 

 

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus
7 hours ago, Daisygirlsk said:

7am - took .25mg ativan. Slept for 2 hours..also took 200mg magnesium glycinate 

10am - woke up to heart racing. 

 

Please read the links that are posted in your thread. I'm posting this one again:

 

The rule of 3KIS: Keep it simple. Keep it slow. Keep it stable.

 

Because you added in a supplement at the same time you made a benzo timing change, it's impossible to know if your symptoms of sleeping during the day or waking up with heart racing was due to the Ativan or the magnesium or the combination.

 

That's why we recommend one change at a time.

 

 

Link to comment

I want off the ativan. What's the best way to taper over the next two weeks 

April 2011 - citalopram 20 mg

April 2018 - tapered in 4 weeks

Nov 2018 - reinstated 20 mg

Stopped 8 days later bad reaction

November 5 2020 - reinstated citalopram 0.5mg. Increase to 1mg

November 10 2020 - stopped citalopram.  

December 8 2020 - reinstate 2.5mg citalopram. Stayed on until December 17

December 20 2020 - discontinue citalopram again 

Dec 2020 - start ativan for akathisia 

Nov 2020 to Jan 2021 - tried low dose Seroquel, Risperidone, Luvox, Zoloft and Prozac. just added symptoms no benefit

Feb 2021 - ativan went paradoxical. landed in hospital. cold turkeyed.

Totally drug free since Feb 21, 2021

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus
2 minutes ago, Daisygirlsk said:

I want off the ativan. What's the best way to taper over the next two weeks 

 

Please re-read my post. The two weeks is the maximum timeframe you want to be on this drug. You'll need to taper off over the next 4 days. 

 

19 minutes ago, Shep said:

You could do a rapid taper off Ativan, making sure you're off within 2 weeks. That means tapering off over the next 4 days. 

 

The easiest way to do this is to reduce 25% every day:

 

 .75 mg, .50 mg, .25 mg, and then stop. 

 

5 hours ago, Daisygirlsk said:

But I do want off this benzo and would rather fully use non drug techniques to cope.

 

Do you have a game plan for how you will handle your symptoms? Please post a list here or write one down on paper at home so you can be ready to distract and find ways of self-soothing when the symptoms hit. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Link to comment

Thank you. A couple things that work for me so far are distractions, lots of heat on my body and legs and chamomile tea. I plan to start taking baths before bed and doing a lot of guided meditations as well. Being around family also helps. I want to purchase a weighted blanket 

April 2011 - citalopram 20 mg

April 2018 - tapered in 4 weeks

Nov 2018 - reinstated 20 mg

Stopped 8 days later bad reaction

November 5 2020 - reinstated citalopram 0.5mg. Increase to 1mg

November 10 2020 - stopped citalopram.  

December 8 2020 - reinstate 2.5mg citalopram. Stayed on until December 17

December 20 2020 - discontinue citalopram again 

Dec 2020 - start ativan for akathisia 

Nov 2020 to Jan 2021 - tried low dose Seroquel, Risperidone, Luvox, Zoloft and Prozac. just added symptoms no benefit

Feb 2021 - ativan went paradoxical. landed in hospital. cold turkeyed.

Totally drug free since Feb 21, 2021

Link to comment

Please sign in to comment

You will be able to leave a comment after signing in



Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Terms of Use Privacy Policy