Jump to content

puthappinessfirst: starting the fight


puthappinessfirst

Recommended Posts

puthappinessfirst

So I saw the trauma/anxiety/ocd therapist today. She is very educated and smart when it comes to ocd but not when it comes to psych meds. It was kinda obvious she did not believe about my protracted withdrawal, saying 10mg of celexa is such a low dose and doesn't do much. I told her about wanting to come off over a year or two and she said it really shouldn't take that long. I want to learn from her but this always hurts to hear, as you all know. 

Celexa 10mg: 2007 to June 2018, stopped CT

No meds: June 2018 to December 2018

PROTRACTED WD-- major depressive episode for 2+ weeks

Lexapro 10mg: December 12, 2018 to January 19, 2019, severe adverse reaction

Celexa 10mg: January 20, 2019

June 24, 2019: 9mg

July 22, 2019: 8.5mg

Jan 8, 2020: 8mg

Aug 25, 2020: 7.2mg

 

Supplements: Magnesium, Fish Oil

Link to post
  • Replies 257
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

  • puthappinessfirst

    135

  • Carmie

    34

  • ChessieCat

    17

  • intothewoods

    10

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Posts

@sunnysideup69   Sorry for taking so long to get back to you! I hope your stabilization is continuing well. It took me 5 mos to feel good enough to start my taper, so don't worry. It'll cont

@SolarPlexus thank you!   I absolutely love Claire Weekes.

Hi! Been a minute. Nice to "see" you again too 🙂   Mood wise, I am ok actually. I had a good amount of fear and anxiety around surgery- going into it and whatnot. And now as I am slowly heal

puthappinessfirst

Is there a specific brand of fish oil that people here prefer? Mine just ran out.

Celexa 10mg: 2007 to June 2018, stopped CT

No meds: June 2018 to December 2018

PROTRACTED WD-- major depressive episode for 2+ weeks

Lexapro 10mg: December 12, 2018 to January 19, 2019, severe adverse reaction

Celexa 10mg: January 20, 2019

June 24, 2019: 9mg

July 22, 2019: 8.5mg

Jan 8, 2020: 8mg

Aug 25, 2020: 7.2mg

 

Supplements: Magnesium, Fish Oil

Link to post
  • Moderator Emeritus

NEW!!!     INTERVIEW with Altostrata, SA's founder    NEW!!! 

 

Plodding along inch by inch:  12" = 1',  3' =  36 " or 1 yard,  1760 yards  = 63,360" or 1 mile

Current from 6 Feb 2021:  Pristiq 0.365 mg

ADs since ~1992:  25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq:  50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity)  Tapering Oct 2015 

My tapering program   My Intro (goes to my tapering graph)  My website

PLEASE NOTE:  I am not a medical professional.  I provide information and make suggestions.

Link to post
puthappinessfirst
1 minute ago, ChessieCat said:

 

Thanks, CC. But I was asking about fish oil 😁

Celexa 10mg: 2007 to June 2018, stopped CT

No meds: June 2018 to December 2018

PROTRACTED WD-- major depressive episode for 2+ weeks

Lexapro 10mg: December 12, 2018 to January 19, 2019, severe adverse reaction

Celexa 10mg: January 20, 2019

June 24, 2019: 9mg

July 22, 2019: 8.5mg

Jan 8, 2020: 8mg

Aug 25, 2020: 7.2mg

 

Supplements: Magnesium, Fish Oil

Link to post
  • Moderator Emeritus

LOL.  I had just been posting to a different member about taking magnesium throughout the day.  Sorry.  Glad you could see the funny side.

 

Here's the correct one.  I think Alto mentions what she takes:  Omega-3 Fish Oil

NEW!!!     INTERVIEW with Altostrata, SA's founder    NEW!!! 

 

Plodding along inch by inch:  12" = 1',  3' =  36 " or 1 yard,  1760 yards  = 63,360" or 1 mile

Current from 6 Feb 2021:  Pristiq 0.365 mg

ADs since ~1992:  25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq:  50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity)  Tapering Oct 2015 

My tapering program   My Intro (goes to my tapering graph)  My website

PLEASE NOTE:  I am not a medical professional.  I provide information and make suggestions.

Link to post
  • Moderator Emeritus
On 2/3/2019 at 10:47 AM, Altostrata said:

I get Trader Joe's or NOW Foods fish oil myself.

 

NEW!!!     INTERVIEW with Altostrata, SA's founder    NEW!!! 

 

Plodding along inch by inch:  12" = 1',  3' =  36 " or 1 yard,  1760 yards  = 63,360" or 1 mile

Current from 6 Feb 2021:  Pristiq 0.365 mg

ADs since ~1992:  25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq:  50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity)  Tapering Oct 2015 

My tapering program   My Intro (goes to my tapering graph)  My website

PLEASE NOTE:  I am not a medical professional.  I provide information and make suggestions.

Link to post
puthappinessfirst

Thank you, @ChessieCat ! Don't worry, I know how it is. I don't know what time it is where you are, but it's almost 5pm where I am, which means I am dragging and am squirming to leave work soon. I am not very sharp around this time 😬

Celexa 10mg: 2007 to June 2018, stopped CT

No meds: June 2018 to December 2018

PROTRACTED WD-- major depressive episode for 2+ weeks

Lexapro 10mg: December 12, 2018 to January 19, 2019, severe adverse reaction

Celexa 10mg: January 20, 2019

June 24, 2019: 9mg

July 22, 2019: 8.5mg

Jan 8, 2020: 8mg

Aug 25, 2020: 7.2mg

 

Supplements: Magnesium, Fish Oil

Link to post
puthappinessfirst

Just a tiny update...

 

I've had some decent few days but today is not so good. Woke up with a mind racing 1000 miles a minute, restlessness, sore/tingly arms. I am super happy I had a really good day on Sunday and Monday, yesterday was uneventful and I was content, today is blah. I took the morning off from work but came in anyway at noon. Trying to make it through.

Celexa 10mg: 2007 to June 2018, stopped CT

No meds: June 2018 to December 2018

PROTRACTED WD-- major depressive episode for 2+ weeks

Lexapro 10mg: December 12, 2018 to January 19, 2019, severe adverse reaction

Celexa 10mg: January 20, 2019

June 24, 2019: 9mg

July 22, 2019: 8.5mg

Jan 8, 2020: 8mg

Aug 25, 2020: 7.2mg

 

Supplements: Magnesium, Fish Oil

Link to post
intothewoods

Sorry that you woke in a wave today, puthappinessfirst. Especially after having windows two days in a row, then comes restlessness and sore, tingling arms which is terrible. But you are still happy -- it does show ☺️-- and you made it to work after all. You're probably headed home by now as it's 6ish in California. I hope the afternoon wasn't too rough and that you have a more restful evening. 

 

Looking forward to getting to know a fellow writer better!

 

Healing thoughts .... ~ Catherine

* Prozac: 40 mg 1999-2012; 60 mg 2012-March 2018; 50 mg April 2018 to present.

* Provigil: 25-100 mg PRN 2005 to mid-2015; 200-300 mg mid-2015 to early 2016; tapered from 300 mg in early 2016 to 100 mg early 2017; tapered from 100 mg early 2017 to 31 mg June 15, 2019; 29 mg at present.

* Amitriptyline: 10-15 mg 2002-2013; 25 mg 2014 to December 5, 2018; December 15, 2018 converted to water suspension and tapered to 22 1/2 mg at present.

* Valium: 5 mg at night 2002-present

 Supplements: Magnesium; Iron for anemia

 

Back Story: From 2012 thru early 2017, relocated and cycled through over 20 primary and psych docs (supposedly for severe Chronic Fatigue Syndrome) who prescribed two dozen different psych meds in search of the "perfect therapeutic combo." Took most for only a few days, some for a week. Included Wellbutrin, Cymbalta, Lexapro, Seroquel, Lamictal, Klonopin, Lyrica, Gabapentin, Belsomra, Tramadol, Librium, Halcyon, Remeron and -- the last straw, Trintellix. Began in early 2016 when it was still called Brintellix (Pharma's attempt to combine the words "brilliance" and "intelligence" in a pill name), became unable to eat or sleep, lost 25 lbs and the ability to speak. Slowly tapered myself back to Prozac by 2017 but was unable to stop akathisia, cortisol mornings and kindling which continue, actively, through present.

Link to post
  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi Happiness, 

 

I’m sorry you’re in a wave, but I’m so happy you’ve had lots of good days. Your brain is working hard at healing, there’s no way of avoiding windows and waves, as that is how the brain heals. We will get there in the end! 

 

You said you used to write about musicians and musical events. I go to lots of concerts and love music, as you know. Have you ever seen Keane, or Tom Chaplin in concert? I love Tom’s voice,  and even though he’s no longer with Keane he was still doing solo concerts. I’ve never seen him in concert, why doesn’t he come to Queensland?😀

 

Take care, and I hope you’re in a window again soon.💚

Been on antipsychotics, benzos, antidepressants and painkillers for chronic pain. 

Been cold turkeyed and put on and off all sorts of things. Was suicidal n ended up in a psych ward because I had akathisia from withdrawals. Can’t remember what I was put on but when I was released was in the same predicament with severe akathisia n was suicidal again.

Back to the ward and was given different meds. Tapered off one and have been trying to taper off Seroquel since. It’s been many, many years of tapering so far.

I’ve  tapered from 300mg of Seroquel to 7.5mg./ March 10 2019=7.25mg / 17th of April=7 mg / June 5th=6.75mg/ July 14th=6.50mg/ August 28=6.25mg/ 10th of Oct= 6.20mg/ October 21=6mg/ December 16=5.80mg/.   January 21 2020=5.60mg/April 2=5.40g/ May 29=5.20mg/ August 14= 5mg/ September 29=4.80mg/ Jan 31, 2021=4.60 mg/

 

I AM NOT A MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL. These are my own views based on what I’ve experienced myself.

 

 

Link to post
puthappinessfirst
On 3/20/2019 at 6:09 PM, intothewoods said:

Sorry that you woke in a wave today, puthappinessfirst. Especially after having windows two days in a row, then comes restlessness and sore, tingling arms which is terrible. But you are still happy -- it does show ☺️-- and you made it to work after all. You're probably headed home by now as it's 6ish in California. I hope the afternoon wasn't too rough and that you have a more restful evening. 

 

Looking forward to getting to know a fellow writer better!

 

Healing thoughts .... ~ Catherine

 

Thank you, C. You are so sweet! <3 

Celexa 10mg: 2007 to June 2018, stopped CT

No meds: June 2018 to December 2018

PROTRACTED WD-- major depressive episode for 2+ weeks

Lexapro 10mg: December 12, 2018 to January 19, 2019, severe adverse reaction

Celexa 10mg: January 20, 2019

June 24, 2019: 9mg

July 22, 2019: 8.5mg

Jan 8, 2020: 8mg

Aug 25, 2020: 7.2mg

 

Supplements: Magnesium, Fish Oil

Link to post
puthappinessfirst
14 hours ago, Carmie said:

Hi Happiness, 

 

I’m sorry you’re in a wave, but I’m so happy you’ve had lots of good days. Your brain is working hard at healing, there’s no way of avoiding windows and waves, as that is how the brain heals. We will get there in the end! 

 

You said you used to write about musicians and musical events. I go to lots of concerts and love music, as you know. Have you ever seen Keane, or Tom Chaplin in concert? I love Tom’s voice,  and even though he’s no longer with Keane he was still doing solo concerts. I’ve never seen him in concert, why doesn’t he come to Queensland?😀

 

Take care, and I hope you’re in a window again soon.💚

 

Thank you, Carmie. You light and positivity uplifts so many. I am grateful for you! I am feeling better today, I think my windows are becoming more frequent! *Knocks on wood*

 

I have not seen Keane/Tom Chaplin but that sounds like it would be a good time! I am always happy to connect with a fellow music lover. Music has kept me going through many dark moments. I listen to the same songs that are comforting to me on repeat because they calm my mind down and remind me of happy times. Music is such a gift. 

Celexa 10mg: 2007 to June 2018, stopped CT

No meds: June 2018 to December 2018

PROTRACTED WD-- major depressive episode for 2+ weeks

Lexapro 10mg: December 12, 2018 to January 19, 2019, severe adverse reaction

Celexa 10mg: January 20, 2019

June 24, 2019: 9mg

July 22, 2019: 8.5mg

Jan 8, 2020: 8mg

Aug 25, 2020: 7.2mg

 

Supplements: Magnesium, Fish Oil

Link to post
puthappinessfirst

Don't think I have many eyes on my topic, but going to put it out there anyway.

 

Has anyone thought that dreaming is a sign of healing??

 

This week I have had several memorable (good and bad) dreams and now that I think of it, I haven't had/remembered my dreams ever since my CT/Lexapro disaster. Wow, I am dreaming again! I had many nightmares when I was on Lexapro for a month, but those were terrifying and I think my mind was telling me something was very wrong.

Celexa 10mg: 2007 to June 2018, stopped CT

No meds: June 2018 to December 2018

PROTRACTED WD-- major depressive episode for 2+ weeks

Lexapro 10mg: December 12, 2018 to January 19, 2019, severe adverse reaction

Celexa 10mg: January 20, 2019

June 24, 2019: 9mg

July 22, 2019: 8.5mg

Jan 8, 2020: 8mg

Aug 25, 2020: 7.2mg

 

Supplements: Magnesium, Fish Oil

Link to post
  • Moderator
57 minutes ago, puthappinessfirst said:

Has anyone thought that dreaming is a sign of healing??

 

Just my opinion, but to me it is.  As I've gotten lower on my Lexapro taper, I've been dreaming (and remembering)more and more and having feelings in the dreams.  Before, no dreams, no feelings, just nullity.

 

I would take it as a good sign.

Gridley Introduction

 

Lexapro 20 mg since 2004.  Begin Brassmonkey Slide Taper Jan. 2017.   

End 2017 year 1 of taper at 9.25mg 

End 2018 year 2 of taper at 4.1mg

End 2019 year 3 of taper at 1.0mg  

Oct. 30, 2020  Jump to zero from 0.025mg.  Current dose: 0.000mg

3 year, 10 month taper is 100% complete.

 

Ativan 1 mg 1986-1991 CT, soon reinstated.  CT 2000. RI 1 mg 2011-2016.  Sept. 2016  0.625mg X 3

Nov.27, 2020, 7-week Ativan-Valium crossover + change to one 18.75mg dose, w/1 month hold.

Feb. 9, 2021, begin 10% every 4 weeks taper.  Current dose as of Feb. 23: 16.0mgai.

 

Imipramine 75 mg daily since 1986.  Jan. 2016 began every 3-weeks 10% taper, down to 16mgai (0.44mgpw).  Aug 2016, discovered SA, holding at 16mg.  Taper is 78% complete.  

  

Supplements: omega, vitamins C, E and D3, magnesium glycinate, probiotic, zinc, melatonin .3mg.


I am not a medical professional and this is not medical advice, but simply information based on my own experience, as well as other members who have survived these drugs.

Link to post
puthappinessfirst
2 hours ago, Gridley said:

 

Just my opinion, but to me it is.  As I've gotten lower on my Lexapro taper, I've been dreaming (and remembering)more and more and having feelings in the dreams.  Before, no dreams, no feelings, just nullity.

 

I would take it as a good sign.

 

Love seeing your progress on your Lex taper! I think I will be ready to taper my Celexa soon. I am so ready for some of these side effects to dissipate.

 

Thank you for sharing! 

Celexa 10mg: 2007 to June 2018, stopped CT

No meds: June 2018 to December 2018

PROTRACTED WD-- major depressive episode for 2+ weeks

Lexapro 10mg: December 12, 2018 to January 19, 2019, severe adverse reaction

Celexa 10mg: January 20, 2019

June 24, 2019: 9mg

July 22, 2019: 8.5mg

Jan 8, 2020: 8mg

Aug 25, 2020: 7.2mg

 

Supplements: Magnesium, Fish Oil

Link to post
  • Moderator Emeritus
On 3/23/2019 at 1:15 AM, puthappinessfirst said:

 

Thank you, Carmie. You light and positivity uplifts so many. I am grateful for you! I am feeling better today, I think my windows are becoming more frequent! *Knocks on wood*

 

I have not seen Keane/Tom Chaplin but that sounds like it would be a good time! I am always happy to connect with a fellow music lover. Music has kept me going through many dark moments. I listen to the same songs that are comforting to me on repeat because they calm my mind down and remind me of happy times. Music is such a gift. 

 

YAY for more frequent windows Happiness!

 

I sometimes play the same songs over and over again too. Music certainly is a gift, I agree with you one hundred percent there. 

 

Sending hugs🤗

Been on antipsychotics, benzos, antidepressants and painkillers for chronic pain. 

Been cold turkeyed and put on and off all sorts of things. Was suicidal n ended up in a psych ward because I had akathisia from withdrawals. Can’t remember what I was put on but when I was released was in the same predicament with severe akathisia n was suicidal again.

Back to the ward and was given different meds. Tapered off one and have been trying to taper off Seroquel since. It’s been many, many years of tapering so far.

I’ve  tapered from 300mg of Seroquel to 7.5mg./ March 10 2019=7.25mg / 17th of April=7 mg / June 5th=6.75mg/ July 14th=6.50mg/ August 28=6.25mg/ 10th of Oct= 6.20mg/ October 21=6mg/ December 16=5.80mg/.   January 21 2020=5.60mg/April 2=5.40g/ May 29=5.20mg/ August 14= 5mg/ September 29=4.80mg/ Jan 31, 2021=4.60 mg/

 

I AM NOT A MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL. These are my own views based on what I’ve experienced myself.

 

 

Link to post
puthappinessfirst

I read the hypnic jerks thread, but one gripe that I have during this process is that I cannot nap during the day. I can sleep at night with minimal issues (praise be) but if I get exhausted during the day and try to nap I'm always woken up by jerks in my legs, core, or neck. I used to nap no problem. It's so weird and I'm wondering why this is. Maybe just the daylight? Maybe my sleep schedule is so strong my body doesn't want me to sleep at any other time without my routine? Who knows...

Celexa 10mg: 2007 to June 2018, stopped CT

No meds: June 2018 to December 2018

PROTRACTED WD-- major depressive episode for 2+ weeks

Lexapro 10mg: December 12, 2018 to January 19, 2019, severe adverse reaction

Celexa 10mg: January 20, 2019

June 24, 2019: 9mg

July 22, 2019: 8.5mg

Jan 8, 2020: 8mg

Aug 25, 2020: 7.2mg

 

Supplements: Magnesium, Fish Oil

Link to post
puthappinessfirst

I need to start taking notes again, so I will do so here so it is easier for me (and anyone else who wants to chime in) to follow any patterns.

 

3/24

 

Anxiety- 7/10

Derealization- 5/10

Intrusive thoughts- 7/10

 

I stayed in bed all day yesterday because of a pretty high level of anxiety/agoraphobia/fear. I tried to nap, but as you can see above, couldn't because of hypnic jerks. I ran a couple errands in the morning and retired myself to my bed for the rest of the day until about 8pm. I kept funny movies on all day so that I could try and lighten the mood and try to laugh, even if I was just laying there with my eyes closed. I then went to a friends house for a movie and dinner which helped calm me a bit. I then came home a little after 10pm and fell asleep with no real issues. 

Celexa 10mg: 2007 to June 2018, stopped CT

No meds: June 2018 to December 2018

PROTRACTED WD-- major depressive episode for 2+ weeks

Lexapro 10mg: December 12, 2018 to January 19, 2019, severe adverse reaction

Celexa 10mg: January 20, 2019

June 24, 2019: 9mg

July 22, 2019: 8.5mg

Jan 8, 2020: 8mg

Aug 25, 2020: 7.2mg

 

Supplements: Magnesium, Fish Oil

Link to post
  • Administrator

Hi, phf.

 

To make sense of a daily pattern, we need times of day for the symptoms (and, if you're taking drugs, when you take your drugs). Were any of those symptoms better or worse at particular times of day?

 

Good idea to look for laughs!

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

Link to post
puthappinessfirst

Hi, @Altostrata! Thanks for coming, I appreciate it.

 

Well, yesterday, all my symptoms remained pretty steady throughout the day. Yesterday was more of a wave, I suppose. So they didn't really let up too much. I saw a friend in the evening and I always feel "safer" around familiar company, so that was probably the only time my symptoms "lessened" during the day yesterday.  

 

Typically on average, things mellow out as the day goes by. I have to give myself pep talks each morning to try and tackle the day. I have had some good days recently where things are more manageable as dare I say, mostly happy and relaxed?? The symptoms I struggle with most are racing/intrusive thoughts, anxiety, hypersensitivity to loud/abrupt noises, and hyperawareness(??). Basically, it feels like I have panoramic vision and can see every shadow/person/movement in my vision. It's pretty uncomfortable being that aware/alert all the time. 

 

I take 10mg of Celexa every evening, between 830pm and 9pm. I've been here for 2 months now.

 

Also, I did 3 days of specific, detailed journaling on page 2 of my thread. I know I should keep this up, just wanted to let you know in case you looked over it :)

Celexa 10mg: 2007 to June 2018, stopped CT

No meds: June 2018 to December 2018

PROTRACTED WD-- major depressive episode for 2+ weeks

Lexapro 10mg: December 12, 2018 to January 19, 2019, severe adverse reaction

Celexa 10mg: January 20, 2019

June 24, 2019: 9mg

July 22, 2019: 8.5mg

Jan 8, 2020: 8mg

Aug 25, 2020: 7.2mg

 

Supplements: Magnesium, Fish Oil

Link to post
  • Administrator

Have you found that Celexa makes you sleepy?

 

Over the last 2 months, how have your symptoms changed?

 

It seems you may be hypersensitive to the normal early-morning cortisol spike. This might be helpful Waking with panic or anxiety -- managing cortisol spikes

 

Tips to help sleep -- so many of us have that awful withdrawal insomnia

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

Link to post
puthappinessfirst
4 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

Have you found that Celexa makes you sleepy?

 

 

Before my CT, Celexa made me incredibly sleepy. I'd get 8 to 10 hours of sleep a night. On the weekends if I had nothing to do I'd often take a 2 hour nap midday. 

Now, I wish I could nap midday, but can't because of the muscle jerks. 

 

7 minutes ago, Altostrata said:

Over the last 2 months, how have your symptoms changed?

 

 

-I would say that the morning cortisol has lessened. I used to shoot up in the mornings. Now, I wake up abruptly, but don't feel like I am being propelled from a cannon. 

-I am sleeping better. I used to wake up 3 or 4 times in the night. Now, maybe 1 or 2 times. Sometimes not at all. Luckily, I have no issues actually falling asleep. 

-Akathisia has improved. I don't feel the need to try and work out hard in the morning or run laps around my living room because of the restlessness. I still have inner vibrations/tremors, but they are very much less than what I was dealing with before. 

-I had really bad burning brain in the beginning. Now not so much. Maybe once in a while and it comes and goes quickly. 

 

I personally feel like the anxiety/hypersensitivity/racing thoughts have stayed pretty much the same since reinstatement. They often reach high levels but I am currently in therapy, getting massage/acupuncture/meditating/practicing deep breathing to help alleviate what I can of it. 

 

I am interested in trying a 5% taper soon. 

Celexa 10mg: 2007 to June 2018, stopped CT

No meds: June 2018 to December 2018

PROTRACTED WD-- major depressive episode for 2+ weeks

Lexapro 10mg: December 12, 2018 to January 19, 2019, severe adverse reaction

Celexa 10mg: January 20, 2019

June 24, 2019: 9mg

July 22, 2019: 8.5mg

Jan 8, 2020: 8mg

Aug 25, 2020: 7.2mg

 

Supplements: Magnesium, Fish Oil

Link to post
  • Administrator

It seems you are stabilizing. I'd give it another few months.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

Link to post
puthappinessfirst
2 hours ago, Altostrata said:

It seems you are stabilizing. I'd give it another few months.

 

Ohhh, Alto, Alto... Not what I wanted to hear, but thank you for letting me know I need to hold on a bit. Much appreciated!

Celexa 10mg: 2007 to June 2018, stopped CT

No meds: June 2018 to December 2018

PROTRACTED WD-- major depressive episode for 2+ weeks

Lexapro 10mg: December 12, 2018 to January 19, 2019, severe adverse reaction

Celexa 10mg: January 20, 2019

June 24, 2019: 9mg

July 22, 2019: 8.5mg

Jan 8, 2020: 8mg

Aug 25, 2020: 7.2mg

 

Supplements: Magnesium, Fish Oil

Link to post
  • 2 weeks later...
puthappinessfirst

I'm really bad at keeping daily notes.

 

I have decided to download the WD symptoms checklist so that it's easy and simple for me to check off and reflect on. 

 

Right now I am toying with the idea of trying L-Theanine and NAC. Of course, one at a time. 

The anxiety is crushing me. 

Celexa 10mg: 2007 to June 2018, stopped CT

No meds: June 2018 to December 2018

PROTRACTED WD-- major depressive episode for 2+ weeks

Lexapro 10mg: December 12, 2018 to January 19, 2019, severe adverse reaction

Celexa 10mg: January 20, 2019

June 24, 2019: 9mg

July 22, 2019: 8.5mg

Jan 8, 2020: 8mg

Aug 25, 2020: 7.2mg

 

Supplements: Magnesium, Fish Oil

Link to post
  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi Happiness, 

 

I’m really sorry you’re struggling so much. It’s quite a rollercoaster ride, isn’t it? Just wanted to pop around and send you some hugs🤗

Been on antipsychotics, benzos, antidepressants and painkillers for chronic pain. 

Been cold turkeyed and put on and off all sorts of things. Was suicidal n ended up in a psych ward because I had akathisia from withdrawals. Can’t remember what I was put on but when I was released was in the same predicament with severe akathisia n was suicidal again.

Back to the ward and was given different meds. Tapered off one and have been trying to taper off Seroquel since. It’s been many, many years of tapering so far.

I’ve  tapered from 300mg of Seroquel to 7.5mg./ March 10 2019=7.25mg / 17th of April=7 mg / June 5th=6.75mg/ July 14th=6.50mg/ August 28=6.25mg/ 10th of Oct= 6.20mg/ October 21=6mg/ December 16=5.80mg/.   January 21 2020=5.60mg/April 2=5.40g/ May 29=5.20mg/ August 14= 5mg/ September 29=4.80mg/ Jan 31, 2021=4.60 mg/

 

I AM NOT A MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL. These are my own views based on what I’ve experienced myself.

 

 

Link to post
puthappinessfirst

Hi @Carmie

 

Thank you for popping by! It is always great to "hear" from you. 

 

Thanks for the virtual hug, it really helps ❤️ 

Celexa 10mg: 2007 to June 2018, stopped CT

No meds: June 2018 to December 2018

PROTRACTED WD-- major depressive episode for 2+ weeks

Lexapro 10mg: December 12, 2018 to January 19, 2019, severe adverse reaction

Celexa 10mg: January 20, 2019

June 24, 2019: 9mg

July 22, 2019: 8.5mg

Jan 8, 2020: 8mg

Aug 25, 2020: 7.2mg

 

Supplements: Magnesium, Fish Oil

Link to post
puthappinessfirst

@Carmie, I have decided:

 

Both @intothewoods and I will make a trip out there one day to see you and enjoy a concert together! Yay! I am manifesting this. 

Celexa 10mg: 2007 to June 2018, stopped CT

No meds: June 2018 to December 2018

PROTRACTED WD-- major depressive episode for 2+ weeks

Lexapro 10mg: December 12, 2018 to January 19, 2019, severe adverse reaction

Celexa 10mg: January 20, 2019

June 24, 2019: 9mg

July 22, 2019: 8.5mg

Jan 8, 2020: 8mg

Aug 25, 2020: 7.2mg

 

Supplements: Magnesium, Fish Oil

Link to post
intothewoods

Wow, @puthappinessfirst, that is one fantastic idea. Count me in. Business class across the Pacific! (best for post-WD psyches ✈️ 😂)

* Prozac: 40 mg 1999-2012; 60 mg 2012-March 2018; 50 mg April 2018 to present.

* Provigil: 25-100 mg PRN 2005 to mid-2015; 200-300 mg mid-2015 to early 2016; tapered from 300 mg in early 2016 to 100 mg early 2017; tapered from 100 mg early 2017 to 31 mg June 15, 2019; 29 mg at present.

* Amitriptyline: 10-15 mg 2002-2013; 25 mg 2014 to December 5, 2018; December 15, 2018 converted to water suspension and tapered to 22 1/2 mg at present.

* Valium: 5 mg at night 2002-present

 Supplements: Magnesium; Iron for anemia

 

Back Story: From 2012 thru early 2017, relocated and cycled through over 20 primary and psych docs (supposedly for severe Chronic Fatigue Syndrome) who prescribed two dozen different psych meds in search of the "perfect therapeutic combo." Took most for only a few days, some for a week. Included Wellbutrin, Cymbalta, Lexapro, Seroquel, Lamictal, Klonopin, Lyrica, Gabapentin, Belsomra, Tramadol, Librium, Halcyon, Remeron and -- the last straw, Trintellix. Began in early 2016 when it was still called Brintellix (Pharma's attempt to combine the words "brilliance" and "intelligence" in a pill name), became unable to eat or sleep, lost 25 lbs and the ability to speak. Slowly tapered myself back to Prozac by 2017 but was unable to stop akathisia, cortisol mornings and kindling which continue, actively, through present.

Link to post
puthappinessfirst
1 hour ago, intothewoods said:

Wow, @puthappinessfirst, that is one fantastic idea. Count me in. Business class across the Pacific! (best for post-WD psyches ✈️ 😂)

 

Business class would be NICE. Gotta get my traveler's credit card started so I have some miles to use 😂

Celexa 10mg: 2007 to June 2018, stopped CT

No meds: June 2018 to December 2018

PROTRACTED WD-- major depressive episode for 2+ weeks

Lexapro 10mg: December 12, 2018 to January 19, 2019, severe adverse reaction

Celexa 10mg: January 20, 2019

June 24, 2019: 9mg

July 22, 2019: 8.5mg

Jan 8, 2020: 8mg

Aug 25, 2020: 7.2mg

 

Supplements: Magnesium, Fish Oil

Link to post
  • Moderator Emeritus

🎤🎼🎹🎻🎸🎺🎷🥁🎫💃👍😁

Been on antipsychotics, benzos, antidepressants and painkillers for chronic pain. 

Been cold turkeyed and put on and off all sorts of things. Was suicidal n ended up in a psych ward because I had akathisia from withdrawals. Can’t remember what I was put on but when I was released was in the same predicament with severe akathisia n was suicidal again.

Back to the ward and was given different meds. Tapered off one and have been trying to taper off Seroquel since. It’s been many, many years of tapering so far.

I’ve  tapered from 300mg of Seroquel to 7.5mg./ March 10 2019=7.25mg / 17th of April=7 mg / June 5th=6.75mg/ July 14th=6.50mg/ August 28=6.25mg/ 10th of Oct= 6.20mg/ October 21=6mg/ December 16=5.80mg/.   January 21 2020=5.60mg/April 2=5.40g/ May 29=5.20mg/ August 14= 5mg/ September 29=4.80mg/ Jan 31, 2021=4.60 mg/

 

I AM NOT A MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL. These are my own views based on what I’ve experienced myself.

 

 

Link to post
puthappinessfirst

Last night I went to a yoga for anxiety workshop. It uses a CBT workbook as a guide! Very cool.

 

It was a tiny class, just 4 of us, including the instructor, but good for me. 

 

We spoke about sleep and I mentioned waking up with terrible anxiety/panic. 

She suggested maybe it was med-related. (I mentioned I take meds.)

I said, "Funny you should mention that..." and told her my whole story as you all know it. 

 

She empathized and seemed to know about online communities that focus on withdrawal and how hard psych meds are to come off of. 

She's also a psychologist. Very good connection. 

Celexa 10mg: 2007 to June 2018, stopped CT

No meds: June 2018 to December 2018

PROTRACTED WD-- major depressive episode for 2+ weeks

Lexapro 10mg: December 12, 2018 to January 19, 2019, severe adverse reaction

Celexa 10mg: January 20, 2019

June 24, 2019: 9mg

July 22, 2019: 8.5mg

Jan 8, 2020: 8mg

Aug 25, 2020: 7.2mg

 

Supplements: Magnesium, Fish Oil

Link to post
  • Moderator
23 minutes ago, puthappinessfirst said:

 

 

She empathized and seemed to know about online communities that focus on withdrawal and how hard psych meds are to come off of. 

 

 

That is a great connection, puthappinessfirst.  It is so helpful and, unfortunately, rare,  to find someone who "gets" it.  I'm very happy for you.   

Gridley Introduction

 

Lexapro 20 mg since 2004.  Begin Brassmonkey Slide Taper Jan. 2017.   

End 2017 year 1 of taper at 9.25mg 

End 2018 year 2 of taper at 4.1mg

End 2019 year 3 of taper at 1.0mg  

Oct. 30, 2020  Jump to zero from 0.025mg.  Current dose: 0.000mg

3 year, 10 month taper is 100% complete.

 

Ativan 1 mg 1986-1991 CT, soon reinstated.  CT 2000. RI 1 mg 2011-2016.  Sept. 2016  0.625mg X 3

Nov.27, 2020, 7-week Ativan-Valium crossover + change to one 18.75mg dose, w/1 month hold.

Feb. 9, 2021, begin 10% every 4 weeks taper.  Current dose as of Feb. 23: 16.0mgai.

 

Imipramine 75 mg daily since 1986.  Jan. 2016 began every 3-weeks 10% taper, down to 16mgai (0.44mgpw).  Aug 2016, discovered SA, holding at 16mg.  Taper is 78% complete.  

  

Supplements: omega, vitamins C, E and D3, magnesium glycinate, probiotic, zinc, melatonin .3mg.


I am not a medical professional and this is not medical advice, but simply information based on my own experience, as well as other members who have survived these drugs.

Link to post
withhopeinmyheart

That's always great to have someone out there who understands. 

Escitalopram August 2015 - 20mg

Some time in winter 2017 down to 10mg with no problems

May 21 2018 5mg, June 4 2018 2.5mg, June 18 2018 0mg 

October 1 2018 something's wrong 

October 2 2018 arriving in hell

Reinstated 0.25mg

October 27 2018 0.35mg, November 23 2018 0.5mg, November 24 2018 0.6mg

November 28 2018 0.5mg and holding since 

Taking fish oil and magnesium 

L-Thyroxin 50 for Hashimoto's

Link to post
puthappinessfirst
On 4/11/2019 at 5:16 PM, Gridley said:

That is a great connection, puthappinessfirst.  It is so helpful and, unfortunately, rare,  to find someone who "gets" it.  I'm very happy for you.   

 

Thank you, Gridley. I went again this week and it was again very good. 

 

She actually goes in depth into explaining limbic healing and para/sympathetic nervous system. I'm learning some good stuff. 

I feel like she probably knows more than my doctor about it all... Probably because she doesn't prescribe meds as she's a psychologist. 

Celexa 10mg: 2007 to June 2018, stopped CT

No meds: June 2018 to December 2018

PROTRACTED WD-- major depressive episode for 2+ weeks

Lexapro 10mg: December 12, 2018 to January 19, 2019, severe adverse reaction

Celexa 10mg: January 20, 2019

June 24, 2019: 9mg

July 22, 2019: 8.5mg

Jan 8, 2020: 8mg

Aug 25, 2020: 7.2mg

 

Supplements: Magnesium, Fish Oil

Link to post
puthappinessfirst
On 4/13/2019 at 4:31 AM, withhopeinmyheart said:

That's always great to have someone out there who understands. 

 

100000000%

 

Hope you're hanging in there, friend!

Celexa 10mg: 2007 to June 2018, stopped CT

No meds: June 2018 to December 2018

PROTRACTED WD-- major depressive episode for 2+ weeks

Lexapro 10mg: December 12, 2018 to January 19, 2019, severe adverse reaction

Celexa 10mg: January 20, 2019

June 24, 2019: 9mg

July 22, 2019: 8.5mg

Jan 8, 2020: 8mg

Aug 25, 2020: 7.2mg

 

Supplements: Magnesium, Fish Oil

Link to post

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Terms of Use Privacy Policy