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GonnaBeOk

How do you handle the losses? Can anyone relate?

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GonnaBeOk

My precious boys are 21 and 23. They both live out of state since attending college (one is newly married and staying out of state), and I’ve always looked forward to this time in our lives when my husband and I could enjoy their young adult and later adult years with them—traveling to spend time with them as well as enjoying our empty nest years together. Then I recently went through hell severe protracted withdrawal and all those dreams are dashed. I am unable to travel due to horrific symptoms and I know that grandkids will be in our near-ish future. I’ll be missing our son’s nursing school graduation in a few weeks due to my condition. I fear that my relationship with my new daughter in law and grandkids will be limited to FaceTime. My nervous system is quite severely compromised, and I am essentially housebound and often bedbound. I’m only 52. Can anyone relate? I am grieving because I know I have a very long road ahead of me and I miss my kids. We are all very close, but they are living their lives and I’m missing what could have been. I’m a Christian and I know that God is in control of all things, but the many losses due to withdrawal are heartbreaking. Just needed to vent. 😕

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thecowisback

i know how you feel. i find it hard to travel with all this going on and visiting family is possible for me but takes a lot of willpower. i'm sure you will be able to visit them in the future when you're feeling better. i know it's easier said than done but try not to focus too much on what you can't do for now. face-time is better than no contact at all and you need to put your energy into getting better, not worrying about things that are beyond your control for now. it won't always be like this and i'm sure your kids understand. i keep beating myself up over the effect my withdrawals have had on the family but it doesn't serve any purpose. 

you will get better and there are plenty of years ahead for you to enjoy being with your kids. for now just concentrate on yourself xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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thecowisback

i should say i can empathise with how you feel, not i know how you feel as your withdrawals are so much worse than mine 😢

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