☼ getofflex: weaning of Lexapro

[Heath]

@getofflex glad things are getting a little better! Learning skills without meds is my goal! Short cold dark days gets me too! Thank God it’s only temporary! 

[getofflex]

Yes, very gradually things are improving, unless I'm in a bad part of a wave.  This WD is testing my patience like nothing else ever has, but I'm very grateful there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

Edited September 21, 2022 by getofflex

[getofflex]

I have been experiencing some PTSD along with my AD WD.  I just read the thread on trauma therapy and tapering where it says "

”We strongly urge that you NOT START tapering or that you HOLD AT CURRENT DOSE if you...

....

• start or already participate in intense emotional therapy for previous traumatic events”".  

 

So I will wait until I'm done with AD WD before getting therapy for past trauma. 

Edited September 21, 2022 by getofflex

[Erell]

On 1/9/2021 at 12:11 PM, getofflex said:

I have been experiencing some PTSD along with my AD WD.  I just read the thread on trauma therapy and tapering where it says "

”We strongly urge that you NOT START tapering or that you HOLD AT CURRENT DOSE if you...

....

• start or already participate in intense emotional therapy for previous traumatic events”".  

 

So I will wait until I'm done with AD WD before getting therapy for past trauma. 

 

This is a very interesting question, and I think a lot of us about the best time to work on past traumas while engaged in a taper.

Personally, I don't think there is a single answer : I've known people who found great help with EMDR during a taper, while others found that working on past traumas was too rough with a sensitive CNS.

 

I myself don't really know if I wanna engage in a therapy while trying to stabilise.

 

However, a lot of techniques that are suggested to deal with PTSD are relevant techniques while in WD, so instead of focusing on healing previous traumas,  I focus on learning and practicing new skills for my global well-being.

For example, I'm currently learning and use self-compassion and self-love during WD, 

I'm pretty sure all these new skills will help to heal my inner child trauma as well

Sending hugs !

 

Edited September 21, 2022 by getofflex

[getofflex]

I'm currently learning non violet communication.  It means talking to other people without blame, judgment, or criticism in an honest and authentic way.  I'm also learning how to stand up to people who bully.  I've decided to hold off on trauma therapy for now.  My nervous system is extremely sensitive, and cannot cope well with stress at this time. 

Edited September 21, 2022 by getofflex

[getofflex]

I personally find my WD journey like being on a roller coaster ride that is totally wild and unpredictable, and one that I cannot get off of, I just have to stay on the ride and tough it out.  I'm in a bad wave now, have been for almost 2 months, after doing so well for a long time.  

 

I'm extremely and profoundly grateful for this forum!!!  If it weren't for this place, I would not be able to persist through this.  I'm so grateful for the recovery stories, because they give me HOPE that perhaps I, too, will one day recover.  I've been dealing with this for over 3 years, but I see many on here who took more years than that to recover and they did!  I'm going to continue to read the success stories.  Hopefully someday I will have one.  Thank you @Altostrata@Gridleyand everyone else who has been so helpful and supportive to me during this rough time.   

 

Edited September 21, 2022 by getofflex

[getofflex]

Hello, I have a question for the moderators.  I'm down to a very small dose now.  I take 0.13 mg liquid Lexapro.  I noticed that my waves do not correlate to when I taper, but when I have stress.  The symptoms during my wave are insomnia, fatigue, mild GI issues, mild to moderate anxiety (bearable), neurosadness, and hot flashes.  So far I've tapered when I'm doing relatively well.  I continue to feel well for weeks after I taper, and I'm making extremely small tapers, by 0.01 mg.  Since my waves seem to be triggered by stress and not the taper, is it safe to go ahead and taper even when I'm in a wave?  I would not taper faster than once every 4 weeks, and my taper would only be by 0.01 of the liquid lexapro.  

[Krisseyb]

On 1/9/2021 at 12:53 PM, Erell said:

Personally, I don't think there is a single answer : I've known people who found great help with EMDR during a taper, while others found that working on past traumas was too rough with a sensitive CNS

@getofflex I started EMDR therapy in July....after 6 months things are MUCH better....so I now feel like I can start my taper. (started a couple weeks ago)

So....might be an option if needed. Stay at the dosage you are on...and go to therapy....??? If it gets to that point. (for me it's nice to know I have a backup plan, or at least options) 

Gosh...I just know for me, it has helped me so much!!! 

Hoping that yours goes well!

 

[Altostrata]

Hello, getofflex. Where are you in your taper?

 

On 1/19/2021 at 6:07 AM, getofflex said:

I noticed that my waves do not correlate to when I taper, but when I have stress.  The symptoms during my wave are insomnia, fatigue, mild GI issues, mild to moderate anxiety (bearable), neurosadness, and hot flashes.  So far I've tapered when I'm doing relatively well.

 

Your nervous system might be sensitized, where any upset might rock it. You may wish to hold on your taper for a few months, to relieve any additional adjusting your nervous  system might be called up to do.

 

Have you tried fish oil and magnesium supplements, see

https://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/36-king-of-supplements-omega-3-fatty-acids-fish-oil/

https://survivingantidepressants.org/topic/15483-magnesium-natures-calcium-channel-blocker/

 

You might try a little bit of one at a time to see how it affects you. Many people find them soothing.

[getofflex]

@Altostrata I was under a very high amount of stress from August through December.  I have been taking magnesium and fish oil supplements for a while.  I do know my system in sensitized.  I'm at a very low dose of the Lexapro (liquid) at this point.  I'm at 0.11 ml/mg.  For the past several weeks, I have been pretty stable, and feeling much better.  Thanks.  

[Erell]

On 2/26/2021 at 12:12 AM, getofflex said:

  For the past several weeks, I have been pretty stable, and feeling much better.  Thanks.  

So glad to read this ! ☀️

 

You've come such a long way, thank you for the inspiration, really !

[getofflex]

Thank you dear sweet @Erell!  I know you are in a wave at this time, and I hope it subsides soon.  I feel like I've turned a corner in my WD in the past couple of months.  I had been on 5HTP for many years, and weaned off the 5HTP in December and January.   I wonder if that 5HTP was making my WD worse?  I'm glad I stopped it.  I do still have WD symptoms, but they are less awful than they were.  I did have a major wave from end of November through January.  I sometimes think after these bad waves, our brain undergoes even more recovery and we feel even better, so hopefully you will be feeling well soon. 

[Erell]

@getofflex : don't know if anybody can tell that 5HTP was making your WD worse, but as it acts on serotonin receptors it is probably best that you've tapered it and are free of it now.

 

I'm really glad to read you feel like you turned a corner lately !

You're down to 0.11 mg, so close to your goal  ☺

I have no doubt your body had major healing work to do, hopefully the path will now be easier 🤗

 

Take care dear getofflex !

 

( and oh ! I just understood your pseudonym ! Haha! I was reading it in French "jetofflex" 😃)

[getofflex]

I've been taking Benadryl each night before bed to help with sleep, and also because I sometimes wake up with a scratchy throat (allergies?).  Anyway I just read the thread on it, and feel I should quit it.  I will taper off of it.  

 

I'm able to go to sleep right away most nights, but I go through periods where I tend to wake up at 4 AM, meaning I'm only getting about 5.5 or 6 hours of sleep.  This is well before the sun comes up.   But then I will have a few days or a week where I can get 7 or 8 hours of sleep.  Could the Benadryl be causing the early morning awakening? 

[brassmonkey]

It's possible the benadryl is causing the early wakeups but I doubt it is.  Those are some really good sleep numbers for someone in ADWD, in fact for most people in general. It rarely gets talked about but the more natural sleep pattern for people is 4-3-4-13, with the 3 and 13 being awake. This was the natural pattern up until the late 1700's and the start of the Industrial Revolution. At that point the idea of 8 uninterrupted hours of sleep took hold to facilitate work schedules, and we have been slaves to it ever since.

 

Because you are having an easy time falling asleep this would be a good time to establish a "sleep suggestion". This is a key phrase that you you say to trigger a sleep response. It can be quite useful during ADWD and through out life. It is really quite easy to do as long as you are not having problems falling asleep.

 

A key phrase consists of three parts: Stating the desired action, wanting the desired action and initiating the action. All of which is stated aloud. For sleep I use the key phrase "It's time to go to sleep, I want to go to sleep, I will start falling asleep by giving  a big yawn." Just writing the key phrase I can feel it taking affect, but I've had a lot of practice with it.

 

To learn the response you need to use it every night for several weeks. Get all tucked up in bed, say the phrase, give the yawn (even if you don't feel like yawning, just open your mouth as wide as possible for a few seconds) then forget about it. Just lay back and go to sleep as you normally do, your body and mind will do the rest. This needs to be done for several weeks, but only on nights when you are pretty sure you will go right to sleep. I would suggest continuing using the benadryl until you have completed the process, then do your taper. Down the road, when you need to go to sleep but are having some trouble, relax for a second, say the phrase, do the yawn and let the sleep happen.

[Erell]

I'll just add an exercise to Brassmonkey great suggestions :

 

https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/22213-improving-your-vagus-tone-to-help-nervous-system/

 

I've tried it several times, and while it doesn't always work, it often makes me yawn and ease the falling asleep.

 

 

let me know if you try it 😉

[getofflex]

@brassmonkeyvery insteresting about the natural sleep pattern before the Industrial Revolution!  Thanks so much for the sleep suggestion.  I'm going to start that tonight.  Thanks so much. It's reassuring to hear that my sleep is actually pretty good.  I do feel tired and spacey on the days I wake up at 4:00.  But not to the point I cannot function.  I am doing much better now than I was a year ago, and lightyears better than 2 years ago.  

 

@Erellthanks for the link.  I printed that off, and will try that too starting later today or tomorrow.  I love all these non drug coping techniques.  I hope you are doing OK.  I've been thinking about you.  How are you? 

 

 

Edited April 9, 2021 by getofflex

[getofflex]

I'm in a wave as of 1:00 AM.  I went to sleep fine at about 10:45 or so last night.  Woke up feeling as though my feet were on fire.  Crazy.  Feeling hot and cold, anxiety, sudden intrusive dark thoughts, neuroemotions, IBS.  

 

I am coping by listening to soothing music, listening to the Psalms from the Bible, praying, floating, changing the channel, and radical acceptance.  This too shall pass. 

 

 

Edited April 16, 2021 by getofflex

[getofflex]

@Erell I tried the vagus tone technique.  I didn't feel the urge to yawn or sigh.  Until I got hit with the wave, I was sleeping pretty well anyway.  Thanks for the idea.  

 

@brassmonkey I tried the sleep suggestion.  Interestingly, it took me longer to fall asleep those 2 nights, so I thought I better stop it, because instructions say only do this when you can fall asleep quickly.  

Edited April 16, 2021 by getofflex

[brassmonkey]

Good idea Getofflex-- the theory behind it all is that you establish a key phrase that triggers your natural pattern of falling asleep, so you want your body to learn a good association and not one that causes problems. Your original post sounded like everything was going well and it would be a good time to try, but it is good not to push it. It is very hard to undo/unlearn a key phrase.

[getofflex]

I just wanted to report that I took a nap and dozed this afternoon, and feel much better.  Not good, but better.  

[Erell]

On 4/16/2021 at 2:33 PM, getofflex said:

@Erell I tried the vagus tone technique.  I didn't feel the urge to yawn or sigh.  Until I got hit with the wave, I was sleeping pretty well anyway.  Thanks for the idea.  

Oh, this is interesting because I just did the exercice with my mum and she was like you, no yawn !

Perhaps my mind is just sensitive to the suggestion 🙂

 

Whatever works works, and I'm glad to read you already feel better  ☀️

[Erell]

How are you doing these days dear @getofflex ?

Hope the wave has subsided and you're now back to a smoother baseline.

 

I see all the amazing great work you're doing here, thank you for being such a generous soul ☀️

 

Take good care, you deserve it ❤

[Aleena]

@getofflex prayers for you. May your sleep well. 

[getofflex]

@Erelland @AleenaYes, the wave has subsided.  Luckily, it was not too bad, and only lasted several days.  Thanks so much for your concern.  I've slept pretty well the past 2 nights!  I'm very grateful for this. 

[Erell]

Hello dear @getofflex

 

Look at you, 0.10mg ! Wow, you must be so proud of yourself !

I know I am proud of you, and very inspired by your patience and tenacity.

 

How are you doing these days ?

 

Sending hugs ☀️

[getofflex]

Hello @Erelll. I'm doing OK.  I'm going through some stressors.  My husband was forced to retire early from his job, which became awful after another company bought out his company.  His job was already very stressful previously to the takeover and he has PTSD.  My son is home from college, and he is a teenager and can be difficult sometimes.  

 

My WD is improving, but extremely gradually.  I have some good days, and some not so good, typical windows and waves.  I think the stress is slowing down recovery, but life happens, and I can't live in a bubble.  I also have PTSD (from traumatic childhood) so I'm not sure if the symptoms are due to the PTSD or the WD.  So, I'm working on acceptance, and gentle self care, and prayer and faith in Jesus, eating healthy, gentle exercise, enjoying nature.  

 

Thank you for asking.  I appreciate your concern.  How are you doing?  

Edited May 13, 2021 by getofflex

[Erell]

On 5/13/2021 at 2:24 PM, getofflex said:

My WD is improving, but extremely gradually.  I have some good days, and some not so good, typical windows and waves.  I think the stress is slowing down recovery, but life happens, and I can't live in a bubble.  I also have PTSD (from traumatic childhood) so I'm not sure if the symptoms are due to the PTSD or the WD.  So, I'm working on acceptance, and gentle self care, and prayer and faith in Jesus, eating healthy, gentle exercise, enjoying nature.  

 

Oh yes, this process is a real slow and gradual one!

 

Very glad to read you have some good days : hang on to them, they are the real you ❤

I like to write to myself when I feel a bit better : this way you can easily access positive thoughts and expectations when things get rough.

 

I'm not sure anyone can say if stress slow down your recovery. It could be, but some also say that being engaged in life and activities speed recovery.

We can only make guesses : one thing is certain and it is that you're now on a very low dose of med, so even if you still have healing to do your body has already done a ton of healing.

 

And you definitely are a huge inspiration !

 

Do you have to work currently ?

 

PTSD : I don't know if you have already done some work on it, some options sound interesring, like EMDR or TRE. 

But I don't believe it is always a good idea while coping with intense WD symptoms. 

It will probably be interesting for us to take a look at these therapeutic options once recovery from psychdrugs Will be more in place 🙂

 

I send you huge healing vibes and my support for you and your family ☀️

[getofflex]

@Erellthank you for your supportive and encouraging post, I really needed it this morning.  I'm currently in a wave with only 1 hour of sleep last night and neuro and real emotions mixed together.  Yes, I've done some EMDR therapy and other therapy, when I was on the full Lexapro dose, which was probably a good thing or it may have been too much for me.  SA suggests not doing trauma therapy during PAWS, so I've not been doing it.  But when I get triggered, my husband is very supportive and I have a dear close friend who is also very supportive. Thankfully, I am retired and no longer have to work.  My husband was forced into an early retirement a week ago due to being severely overworked, and he was on the verge of a mental and physical breakdown, hence the stress on me.  Since I do have a lot of time on my hands, I was still active on the forum, but just got hit with this wave last night, so will probably lay low until I feel better.  What is TRE?  

Edited May 15, 2021 by getofflex

[getofflex]

I figured out what TRE is. I’m looking into this.  

[Erell]

Oh I'm glad to know your husband is being supportive, and that you have a good friend.

Also nice to know you're retired, at least you avoid work pressure.

 

I'm sorry however for your husband and to see that you have hit another wave. I'm hoping it will be short like the last one.

You're right to take a break of the forum, we all want you to take care of yourself first ❤

 

TRE means "Trauma Release exercices", exercices that are supposed to help to release tension and trauma.

I listened to the book "TRE" by David Berceli after reading this thread on SA : https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/23443-tre-trauma-releasing-exercises/

 

 

One interesting thing is that you don't need to remember or "re-live" the trauma or the tension, the idea is that the body knows his work.

If you interested I think you will find easily videos/explanations in English.

( Here is one : https://youtu.be/FeUioDuJjFI ).

 

As with everything in WD, my advice would be to start low and see how your body react.

In my case, I've realised that if I shiver less than 3 minutes it is soothing, but if I do more it gets activating.

So for now I don't do it and focus on other body practices like finding a safe place in my body, or deep breathing.

But perhaps it might be an interesting tool for people who are no longer in acute.

 

But my favourite tool when I'm able to practice it is visualisation  : I see myself free, happy, in peace 🤗

 

Oh wow, I'm writing a novel here !

My main point is : I send you huge hugs and all my support  ☀️

You've come such a long way !

 

 

 

[getofflex]

Well I'm out of the wave, at least for today.  This WD is very strange.  I'm now in a pattern of sleeping 7-8 hours every other night, and only a few hours in the nights in between - almost like my body wants to be on a 48 hour circadian rhythm.  This has happened before.  

 

I tried the TRE today!  I looked up a video on YouTube.  It was by David Berceli.  At first I didn't get the tremors, but the video was too fast, and I was going too fast.   So I paused the video and took my time, then I get some tremors.  I'm going to try this again tomorrow.  I didn't notice a big difference, but I've felt pretty good today, so maybe that is why.  I feel pretty calm and relaxed right now, so I think it did help me.  I think this TRE will continue to help me, because I've always had a lot of nervous energy, which is probably from trauma stored in my body.  Thanks @Erellfor suggesting this!  When I did EMDR it was pretty powerful, but it was so expensive, it was $120 per session.  I don't have the financial resources at this time.  

[Heath]

@getofflex glad you feel better today ! Hope you and your husband feels much better soon! So great y’all are supportive to each other. Agree with Erell life activities help to recover! And it has worked for me many times. But big but I have been as you have where too much stress sent me in a little wave! Work, teenagers, family, health, negative toxic people at work sometimes can be just too much stress. A lot of times it can just be not enough of me to go around! Of course it can also depend on how stable our system is . Make yourself relax when you’re body is telling you to. Take care of yourself! 

[getofflex]

Thanks, heath.  I got another good nights sleep last night (about 8 hours), so I'm hopefully getting out of this every other night thing.  I need to not overdo it during the day, because I get overstimulated then can't settle down at night.  My husband is gradually getting used to being retired.  His job was horrific and I'm glad he is out of there.  

[Rosetta]

Hi, gettofflex,

 

I’m not sure that I have written on your thread before.  You are very fortunate to have a supportive husband.  I don’t know that I could have made it this far without mine.  
 

It’s good that neither of you have stressful jobs now.  That should make things easier.  I’m sure your husband would rather be working longer at a job that is reasonable, but there are so few that are reasonable.  
 

I’m glad that you found SA.  It’s an oasis, isn’t it?  
 

Take care, Rosetta

[getofflex]

On 5/17/2021 at 4:28 PM, Rosetta said:

You are very fortunate to have a supportive husband.

Yes, I'm deeply grateful for him and his support.  He just retired, suddenly and unexpectedly, about 3 weeks ago.  It is a good thing.  His department got bought out by another company and they overworked him so much he was on the verge of a physical and mental breakdown, so he walked.  He gave 2 weeks notice, but it just wasn't doable.  

 

I'm facing a potential stressful situation in the near future.  My oldest sister is coming into town for a visit in a couple of days.  She isn't staying with me, but I know there will be expectations for me to spend more time with her and them (my mom and 3 sisters) than I'm willing to do.  For personal reasons, I have very limited contact with my family of origin. I need to be strong and stick to my boundaries, and not get sucked in.  

Edited May 25, 2021 by getofflex