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☼ Jgarza7: withdrawals from Invega Sustenna


Jgarza7

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The feelings and emotions will return, for sure.

Reason for Medication

Anxiety (money problems, future, lack of physical safety, dangerous environment) causing mild insomnia.

 

Summary    

2010 - Lexapro - (took one tablet (vomiting, tremors, high anxiety) stopped without any issues)

2013 - Cymbalta - (60mg daily for 7 months - cold turkey without any major issues aside from nausea/vomiting, "brain zaps" and dizziness)

2013 - Seroquel - (a low dose for roughly 1 month - weight gain of 20kg, cold turkey because of rapid weight gain without any issues)

2018 - September 4th - (Cymbalta 20mg for two days, stopped due to tremors & anxiety)

2018 - September 9th - (Olanzapine 2.5mg until October 3rd, then 5mg once, then back to 2.5mg once, then took random varying doses every day for a week from 2.5mg up to 5.0mg due to panic caused by the drug, then I attempted withdrawal Cold Turkey (recommenced at lower dose after 4 days of trying to withdraw Cold Turkey - I took 0.625mg every night until I finally successfully stopped cold turkey roughly one week later).

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Man, I'm with my wife in the bed now and I'm feeling your pain. We both are. I'm crying for you, and that's a feeling that has only recently returned to me...
The feelings come back slowly. You will get them back. It may take some time. You deserve all the love you can get. 

I remember when I started to feel something again. It was a genuine laugh, which I didn't do for many, many months. 

I was so surprised, I almost cried. That was another emotion to return. Tears became healing.
Sending all the strength I have for you.
Shane.
 

Reason for Medication

Anxiety (money problems, future, lack of physical safety, dangerous environment) causing mild insomnia.

 

Summary    

2010 - Lexapro - (took one tablet (vomiting, tremors, high anxiety) stopped without any issues)

2013 - Cymbalta - (60mg daily for 7 months - cold turkey without any major issues aside from nausea/vomiting, "brain zaps" and dizziness)

2013 - Seroquel - (a low dose for roughly 1 month - weight gain of 20kg, cold turkey because of rapid weight gain without any issues)

2018 - September 4th - (Cymbalta 20mg for two days, stopped due to tremors & anxiety)

2018 - September 9th - (Olanzapine 2.5mg until October 3rd, then 5mg once, then back to 2.5mg once, then took random varying doses every day for a week from 2.5mg up to 5.0mg due to panic caused by the drug, then I attempted withdrawal Cold Turkey (recommenced at lower dose after 4 days of trying to withdraw Cold Turkey - I took 0.625mg every night until I finally successfully stopped cold turkey roughly one week later).

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@Jgarza7 Been of drugs for 7month and 2 weeks i live the same hell no improvement.. at all, i have a blank mind, no inner monolgue at all no thoughts… you haave this **** ?

 

And i Don't have emotions, no libido its horrible… 

 

I wish you the best.

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@Shane88L Thank you for your support. I really hope I can get through this. I appreciate your tears. I wish I could easily cry. 

 

@Fausto33 yes I have no emotions or my mind always feels blank. Were you injected or taking pills?

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I Don't have a choice… just that i Don't have a choice.. i see movie, trying and im forcing to go out home, walk but its so horrible without emotions and inner monologue.. I prefer death of that in all life

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Your inner monologue will return slowly, and the emptiness will go away. It gets easier, slowly.

Reason for Medication

Anxiety (money problems, future, lack of physical safety, dangerous environment) causing mild insomnia.

 

Summary    

2010 - Lexapro - (took one tablet (vomiting, tremors, high anxiety) stopped without any issues)

2013 - Cymbalta - (60mg daily for 7 months - cold turkey without any major issues aside from nausea/vomiting, "brain zaps" and dizziness)

2013 - Seroquel - (a low dose for roughly 1 month - weight gain of 20kg, cold turkey because of rapid weight gain without any issues)

2018 - September 4th - (Cymbalta 20mg for two days, stopped due to tremors & anxiety)

2018 - September 9th - (Olanzapine 2.5mg until October 3rd, then 5mg once, then back to 2.5mg once, then took random varying doses every day for a week from 2.5mg up to 5.0mg due to panic caused by the drug, then I attempted withdrawal Cold Turkey (recommenced at lower dose after 4 days of trying to withdraw Cold Turkey - I took 0.625mg every night until I finally successfully stopped cold turkey roughly one week later).

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It has only recently started getting easier for me, and I was like that for months.

I began to accept that I was hurt from the drugs, and then stopped waiting for an instant cure to the hell, and then, it began to get easier.

Smells, nice images...taste, sexual pleasure began to slowly return, as did some mild feelings of motivation. I wanted to draw again, and go outside.
I'm still not 100% at all, and my emotions are still numbed more than they used to be, but I'm feeling better than I did a few months ago.
This has only happened recently for me, and I'm almost 8 months into my cold turkey antipsychotic withdrawal. 8 months is still a relatively short time in withdrawals.
I still have days where I feel hopeless, but they're getting less frequent, and I'm becoming more hopeful.
I believe you need more time.

Reason for Medication

Anxiety (money problems, future, lack of physical safety, dangerous environment) causing mild insomnia.

 

Summary    

2010 - Lexapro - (took one tablet (vomiting, tremors, high anxiety) stopped without any issues)

2013 - Cymbalta - (60mg daily for 7 months - cold turkey without any major issues aside from nausea/vomiting, "brain zaps" and dizziness)

2013 - Seroquel - (a low dose for roughly 1 month - weight gain of 20kg, cold turkey because of rapid weight gain without any issues)

2018 - September 4th - (Cymbalta 20mg for two days, stopped due to tremors & anxiety)

2018 - September 9th - (Olanzapine 2.5mg until October 3rd, then 5mg once, then back to 2.5mg once, then took random varying doses every day for a week from 2.5mg up to 5.0mg due to panic caused by the drug, then I attempted withdrawal Cold Turkey (recommenced at lower dose after 4 days of trying to withdraw Cold Turkey - I took 0.625mg every night until I finally successfully stopped cold turkey roughly one week later).

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It is a truly horrible experience to get through, but we can do this. 


I'm already feeling stronger than I used to be, so that is something positive there!

 

Reason for Medication

Anxiety (money problems, future, lack of physical safety, dangerous environment) causing mild insomnia.

 

Summary    

2010 - Lexapro - (took one tablet (vomiting, tremors, high anxiety) stopped without any issues)

2013 - Cymbalta - (60mg daily for 7 months - cold turkey without any major issues aside from nausea/vomiting, "brain zaps" and dizziness)

2013 - Seroquel - (a low dose for roughly 1 month - weight gain of 20kg, cold turkey because of rapid weight gain without any issues)

2018 - September 4th - (Cymbalta 20mg for two days, stopped due to tremors & anxiety)

2018 - September 9th - (Olanzapine 2.5mg until October 3rd, then 5mg once, then back to 2.5mg once, then took random varying doses every day for a week from 2.5mg up to 5.0mg due to panic caused by the drug, then I attempted withdrawal Cold Turkey (recommenced at lower dose after 4 days of trying to withdraw Cold Turkey - I took 0.625mg every night until I finally successfully stopped cold turkey roughly one week later).

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I'll keep in contact.

Shane.

Reason for Medication

Anxiety (money problems, future, lack of physical safety, dangerous environment) causing mild insomnia.

 

Summary    

2010 - Lexapro - (took one tablet (vomiting, tremors, high anxiety) stopped without any issues)

2013 - Cymbalta - (60mg daily for 7 months - cold turkey without any major issues aside from nausea/vomiting, "brain zaps" and dizziness)

2013 - Seroquel - (a low dose for roughly 1 month - weight gain of 20kg, cold turkey because of rapid weight gain without any issues)

2018 - September 4th - (Cymbalta 20mg for two days, stopped due to tremors & anxiety)

2018 - September 9th - (Olanzapine 2.5mg until October 3rd, then 5mg once, then back to 2.5mg once, then took random varying doses every day for a week from 2.5mg up to 5.0mg due to panic caused by the drug, then I attempted withdrawal Cold Turkey (recommenced at lower dose after 4 days of trying to withdraw Cold Turkey - I took 0.625mg every night until I finally successfully stopped cold turkey roughly one week later).

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@Fausto33 it’s going to be 6 months soon. I still feel the same. My wife says she sees improvements but I don’t see or feel them. I wish all this would just end. 

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  • 3 weeks later...

Changes are very minor, but I'm doing ok, thanks for asking.

How have you two been getting on during this awful road to recovery? Any changes at all? Any small glimpses of positivity?

Reason for Medication

Anxiety (money problems, future, lack of physical safety, dangerous environment) causing mild insomnia.

 

Summary    

2010 - Lexapro - (took one tablet (vomiting, tremors, high anxiety) stopped without any issues)

2013 - Cymbalta - (60mg daily for 7 months - cold turkey without any major issues aside from nausea/vomiting, "brain zaps" and dizziness)

2013 - Seroquel - (a low dose for roughly 1 month - weight gain of 20kg, cold turkey because of rapid weight gain without any issues)

2018 - September 4th - (Cymbalta 20mg for two days, stopped due to tremors & anxiety)

2018 - September 9th - (Olanzapine 2.5mg until October 3rd, then 5mg once, then back to 2.5mg once, then took random varying doses every day for a week from 2.5mg up to 5.0mg due to panic caused by the drug, then I attempted withdrawal Cold Turkey (recommenced at lower dose after 4 days of trying to withdraw Cold Turkey - I took 0.625mg every night until I finally successfully stopped cold turkey roughly one week later).

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You are on the path to recovery.

I feel more aware than I used to be, more careful and better able to protect myself... I'm a stronger person than I used to be, and that is for sure. I don't believe there is a reversion to an old self, but a gradual growth happens from the withdrawals, where you can look back and see that you are a stronger person. Whatever damage that happened, will heal in time. 
 

Reason for Medication

Anxiety (money problems, future, lack of physical safety, dangerous environment) causing mild insomnia.

 

Summary    

2010 - Lexapro - (took one tablet (vomiting, tremors, high anxiety) stopped without any issues)

2013 - Cymbalta - (60mg daily for 7 months - cold turkey without any major issues aside from nausea/vomiting, "brain zaps" and dizziness)

2013 - Seroquel - (a low dose for roughly 1 month - weight gain of 20kg, cold turkey because of rapid weight gain without any issues)

2018 - September 4th - (Cymbalta 20mg for two days, stopped due to tremors & anxiety)

2018 - September 9th - (Olanzapine 2.5mg until October 3rd, then 5mg once, then back to 2.5mg once, then took random varying doses every day for a week from 2.5mg up to 5.0mg due to panic caused by the drug, then I attempted withdrawal Cold Turkey (recommenced at lower dose after 4 days of trying to withdraw Cold Turkey - I took 0.625mg every night until I finally successfully stopped cold turkey roughly one week later).

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Trier cbt for insomnia for few days. I restricted time in bad and etc. Now i cant sleep more then 1 hout.   Cbt failed me. I have no symptoms at all except inability to sleep. . i never feel tired,never feel sleepy, my brain just dont need to sleep anymore. For few day i had no fear of insomnia but i still woke up after 1 hour refreshed.  I dont know what to do... i think i am done surviving withdrawal..

2017 - july 2018 - phenazepam 1mg  when needed (kindling)

aug 2018 - phenazepam 1mg , escitalopram 5mg daily. 

september 2018 - CT from benzo and escitalopram, olanazapine 5mg for 3 days with no effect. Reinstated benzo 1mg , felt better and CT after few days.

october 2018 - mirtazapine (remeron)30mg

november 2018 - mirtazapine stopped working for sleep, Mirtazapine CT, then reinstated and  CT (two weeks) Reinstated benzo and CT after week

december 2018 -  seroquel 25 then 50mg, fluvoxamine several days (blurred vision), clomiprine 1 pill (seizure), amitriptyline 25 or  75 several days.

january- 2019 - seroquel 50mg started building tolerance , so took 75-100 sometimes, depakote  300mg  then 600, then 750 mg, started building tolerance too.

february 2019 - CT seroquel, CT depakote.

Feb- March 2019 - Almost no sleep for few weeks.  Took doxylamine several times.

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Trier cbt for insomnia for few days. I restricted time in bad and etc. Now i cant sleep more then 1 hout.   Cbt failed me. I have no symptoms at all except inability to sleep. . i never feel tired,never feel sleepy, my brain just dont need to sleep anymore. For few day i had no fear of insomnia but i still woke up after 1 hour refreshed.  I dont know what to do... i think i am done surviving withdrawal..

2017 - july 2018 - phenazepam 1mg  when needed (kindling)

aug 2018 - phenazepam 1mg , escitalopram 5mg daily. 

september 2018 - CT from benzo and escitalopram, olanazapine 5mg for 3 days with no effect. Reinstated benzo 1mg , felt better and CT after few days.

october 2018 - mirtazapine (remeron)30mg

november 2018 - mirtazapine stopped working for sleep, Mirtazapine CT, then reinstated and  CT (two weeks) Reinstated benzo and CT after week

december 2018 -  seroquel 25 then 50mg, fluvoxamine several days (blurred vision), clomiprine 1 pill (seizure), amitriptyline 25 or  75 several days.

january- 2019 - seroquel 50mg started building tolerance , so took 75-100 sometimes, depakote  300mg  then 600, then 750 mg, started building tolerance too.

february 2019 - CT seroquel, CT depakote.

Feb- March 2019 - Almost no sleep for few weeks.  Took doxylamine several times.

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@Shane88L thank you for taking the time to respond. I was just wondering if we get our feelings back again. Because my wife says I will be my old self again with time 

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I'm with your wife here, and I believe that yes, with time (sometimes quite a long time), feelings return. From my experience, your feelings don't actually re-appear, as they have never really gone to begin with. They will re-surface and, given time and having more experiences in life (meeting new people, doing new things, challenging yourself and your fears by taking actions etc), you will be essentially inviting your feelings to re-surface. 
I felt nothing and, now, I'm experiencing feelings far more. It is wonderful to feel, and going through the torture of withdrawals is worth it, just to feel again.

Reason for Medication

Anxiety (money problems, future, lack of physical safety, dangerous environment) causing mild insomnia.

 

Summary    

2010 - Lexapro - (took one tablet (vomiting, tremors, high anxiety) stopped without any issues)

2013 - Cymbalta - (60mg daily for 7 months - cold turkey without any major issues aside from nausea/vomiting, "brain zaps" and dizziness)

2013 - Seroquel - (a low dose for roughly 1 month - weight gain of 20kg, cold turkey because of rapid weight gain without any issues)

2018 - September 4th - (Cymbalta 20mg for two days, stopped due to tremors & anxiety)

2018 - September 9th - (Olanzapine 2.5mg until October 3rd, then 5mg once, then back to 2.5mg once, then took random varying doses every day for a week from 2.5mg up to 5.0mg due to panic caused by the drug, then I attempted withdrawal Cold Turkey (recommenced at lower dose after 4 days of trying to withdraw Cold Turkey - I took 0.625mg every night until I finally successfully stopped cold turkey roughly one week later).

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@Shane88L It’s Father’s Day and last year I didn’t feel like this. Maybe that’s why I’m not having any hope right now. I’m not myself towards my wife and kids. I just feel like I’m going to stay like this forever. I feel like this stuff permanently damages a persons mind. Who has actually recovered from this to tell us that everything will be ok? 

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@Jgarza7 I see lots of people Don't recovered after years, with all effect i have .. blank mindset, no inner monologue, no emotions, no libido, ejaculation disfunction.. and i see ots of people recovered al of that, some people heal in process, month after month he became a better person, and other suddenly in five six days he recovered ev everything.. very Strange. 

The moral is we need to play in this groupe of heal. 

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Accepting really will help. Accepting that you've been hurt by the drug, and that more time is needed.  There are plenty of success stories out there, but mostly, the more negative stories are easy to find, as when people recover, few return to talk about their recovery. The thing that didn't help me was reading those negative stories. 

 

Some people do take years to recover fully. I feel like it will take me much longer to recover fully myself, but that's ok. Accepting that you aren't the same as you were last year will help. 

Reason for Medication

Anxiety (money problems, future, lack of physical safety, dangerous environment) causing mild insomnia.

 

Summary    

2010 - Lexapro - (took one tablet (vomiting, tremors, high anxiety) stopped without any issues)

2013 - Cymbalta - (60mg daily for 7 months - cold turkey without any major issues aside from nausea/vomiting, "brain zaps" and dizziness)

2013 - Seroquel - (a low dose for roughly 1 month - weight gain of 20kg, cold turkey because of rapid weight gain without any issues)

2018 - September 4th - (Cymbalta 20mg for two days, stopped due to tremors & anxiety)

2018 - September 9th - (Olanzapine 2.5mg until October 3rd, then 5mg once, then back to 2.5mg once, then took random varying doses every day for a week from 2.5mg up to 5.0mg due to panic caused by the drug, then I attempted withdrawal Cold Turkey (recommenced at lower dose after 4 days of trying to withdraw Cold Turkey - I took 0.625mg every night until I finally successfully stopped cold turkey roughly one week later).

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@Shane88L so you believe that it will take you years to recover? And you’re okay with that? That’s a tough one for me. But I respect your strength. Thank you. 

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With me, I haven't really been experiencing this "windows and waves" pattern, or at least, not that I'm aware of anyway.

My recovery is a struggle against feelings of unreality ever since stopping the drug.
The numbing of emotions came with that.

The beginning of my withdrawals was a severe depression which had my thoughts turn to suicide ( something the me before taking the drug would never have imagined myself ever contemplating), and very, very slowly, things got easier.

Severe anger (directed at the injustice in society - pill pushing "doctors" and psychiatrists), is an emotion I have yet to fully digest...

My wife helps me...

I don't believe in god, just nature...

It may well take me years to fully recover, but I can feel now (enjoyment is still very much numbed and excitement has not fully re-surfaced just yet), but even so, this makes the road to full recovery much easier. 
 

Reason for Medication

Anxiety (money problems, future, lack of physical safety, dangerous environment) causing mild insomnia.

 

Summary    

2010 - Lexapro - (took one tablet (vomiting, tremors, high anxiety) stopped without any issues)

2013 - Cymbalta - (60mg daily for 7 months - cold turkey without any major issues aside from nausea/vomiting, "brain zaps" and dizziness)

2013 - Seroquel - (a low dose for roughly 1 month - weight gain of 20kg, cold turkey because of rapid weight gain without any issues)

2018 - September 4th - (Cymbalta 20mg for two days, stopped due to tremors & anxiety)

2018 - September 9th - (Olanzapine 2.5mg until October 3rd, then 5mg once, then back to 2.5mg once, then took random varying doses every day for a week from 2.5mg up to 5.0mg due to panic caused by the drug, then I attempted withdrawal Cold Turkey (recommenced at lower dose after 4 days of trying to withdraw Cold Turkey - I took 0.625mg every night until I finally successfully stopped cold turkey roughly one week later).

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I'm walking this road to recovery with you. 

Reason for Medication

Anxiety (money problems, future, lack of physical safety, dangerous environment) causing mild insomnia.

 

Summary    

2010 - Lexapro - (took one tablet (vomiting, tremors, high anxiety) stopped without any issues)

2013 - Cymbalta - (60mg daily for 7 months - cold turkey without any major issues aside from nausea/vomiting, "brain zaps" and dizziness)

2013 - Seroquel - (a low dose for roughly 1 month - weight gain of 20kg, cold turkey because of rapid weight gain without any issues)

2018 - September 4th - (Cymbalta 20mg for two days, stopped due to tremors & anxiety)

2018 - September 9th - (Olanzapine 2.5mg until October 3rd, then 5mg once, then back to 2.5mg once, then took random varying doses every day for a week from 2.5mg up to 5.0mg due to panic caused by the drug, then I attempted withdrawal Cold Turkey (recommenced at lower dose after 4 days of trying to withdraw Cold Turkey - I took 0.625mg every night until I finally successfully stopped cold turkey roughly one week later).

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@Shane88L I appreciate your advice. Yes, we are walking this road together. Thank you so much for your response to my hopelessness. I just never thought something like this could happen to someone. 

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I'm glad I can talk with you.. It's nice to feel not so alone. Thank you too.
It is like a nightmare, and I've thought that often.

Things do get better, fortunately. You will get better.
 

Reason for Medication

Anxiety (money problems, future, lack of physical safety, dangerous environment) causing mild insomnia.

 

Summary    

2010 - Lexapro - (took one tablet (vomiting, tremors, high anxiety) stopped without any issues)

2013 - Cymbalta - (60mg daily for 7 months - cold turkey without any major issues aside from nausea/vomiting, "brain zaps" and dizziness)

2013 - Seroquel - (a low dose for roughly 1 month - weight gain of 20kg, cold turkey because of rapid weight gain without any issues)

2018 - September 4th - (Cymbalta 20mg for two days, stopped due to tremors & anxiety)

2018 - September 9th - (Olanzapine 2.5mg until October 3rd, then 5mg once, then back to 2.5mg once, then took random varying doses every day for a week from 2.5mg up to 5.0mg due to panic caused by the drug, then I attempted withdrawal Cold Turkey (recommenced at lower dose after 4 days of trying to withdraw Cold Turkey - I took 0.625mg every night until I finally successfully stopped cold turkey roughly one week later).

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Sooner than later would be wonderful. 

 

Let's keep going.

Reason for Medication

Anxiety (money problems, future, lack of physical safety, dangerous environment) causing mild insomnia.

 

Summary    

2010 - Lexapro - (took one tablet (vomiting, tremors, high anxiety) stopped without any issues)

2013 - Cymbalta - (60mg daily for 7 months - cold turkey without any major issues aside from nausea/vomiting, "brain zaps" and dizziness)

2013 - Seroquel - (a low dose for roughly 1 month - weight gain of 20kg, cold turkey because of rapid weight gain without any issues)

2018 - September 4th - (Cymbalta 20mg for two days, stopped due to tremors & anxiety)

2018 - September 9th - (Olanzapine 2.5mg until October 3rd, then 5mg once, then back to 2.5mg once, then took random varying doses every day for a week from 2.5mg up to 5.0mg due to panic caused by the drug, then I attempted withdrawal Cold Turkey (recommenced at lower dose after 4 days of trying to withdraw Cold Turkey - I took 0.625mg every night until I finally successfully stopped cold turkey roughly one week later).

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