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Finding meaning


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Hi there, I am doing really good. I am completely cured from antidepressants and the withdrawals. God cured me. One night I was at the end of my rope crying and in complete torture I just dropped on my knees with my hands in the air reaching to the ceiling and yelled out to God to just give me one more chance and that I would do right in the world. A few days later I woke up and started crying because I could feel that the awful torture was gone. It has never come back. If your going through the torture of these horrible drugs turn to God and he will help. Turn to him for EVERYTHING!!! I had EVERY horrific symptom from these poisonous antidepressants  Wanted to kill my self. I just couldn’t take it anymore. I couldn’t sleep or eat. I had severe anxiety and depression. Couldn’t leave my house and was really paranoid. I had muscle spasms that were so bad it looked like something was trying to come out of my skin. I went to countless doctors that told me it was all in my head. They all acted like they never heard of this. Dropped on my knees and yelled out to God in agony one night woke up a few days later COMPLETELY HEALED!! Can you explain that? Now I was not a godly person then but I am trying to be now!

Started on ad's at 23. Do not remember what I started with or what dose. I am 34 now

I know I did not not switch medications very often and only used an AD.

Celexa 40 mg (2011-2013)Switched from celexa to Wellbutrin 09/13 for 1 month( quit cold turkey)

1 month later withdrawal kicked in

Got on Prozac 10mg for 2 months 1/14-3/14 switched to Lexapro

Lexapro 10 mg for 6 months 3/14-9/14

Switched back to Wellbutrin 9/14. Started on 150 mg while tapering off of Lexapro. Took 150 mg daily for two weeks while reducing the Lexapro. Dose increased to 300 mg after last pill of Lexapro. Took 300 mg Wellbutrin for two weeks before deciding to stop. Weaned off of it in 6 weeks. 300 mg for 2 weeks 150 mg for 2 weeks 75 mg for 2 weeks

Not sure when withdrawal started or from which drug because I was ok on the Lexapro until depression returned and I switched to Wellbutrin which made it worse. I am now almost 4 months without an AD and it is very difficult to function. I have taken muscle relaxers and different benzos to deal with withdrawal problems.

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  • 1 month later...

Right on. Good for you!

September 2014 to July 2015 - 20 mg Lexapro, 30mg Mirtazipine


August 2015 to November 2016- 10mg Lexapro, 30 mg Mirtazipine


Nov. 2016 to Nov. 2017 - 10mg Lexapro, 3.75 mg Mirtazipine


Nov. 2017 to Mach 2018 - 5mg/2.5mg Lexapro, 0mg Mirtazipne


Mach 2018 to Dec. 2018 - 0mg Lexapro, 0mg Mirtazipne

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  • ChessieCat changed the title to Finding meaning
  • 2 years later...

I've asked for help in this way many times... nothing every changed for me. I'm glad it helped you, Molder. Are you still doing well?

1986: Librium. 1988-90: Nardil. 1990-92: Prozac. 1992-93: Mannerix. 1993-98: Prozac/Lithium/Trazodone/Dexedrine. 1998: CT everything. 1998: Anafranil

1999-2006: Wellbutrin/Trazodone/Dexedrine. 2006: CT everything. 2007: ECT, Wellbutrin. 2008-10: Escitalopram/Trazodone.2010-15: Citalopram/Trazodone/Lorazepam.

2015: Tapered off Citalopram, half off Trazodone. 2015-18: Citalopram/Trazodone/Lorazepam. 2018: Slow taper off half Citalopram, quick taper off Lorazepam.

2019: Citalopram/Mirtazapine. 2020: Quick taper off Citalopram/Mirtazapine; TMS. 2020: Viibryd; alternating Zopiclone/Trazodone/Mirtazapine/Lorazepam for sleep

2021: Off Viibryd since mid-March (3-month taper). Off all sleep drugs since early June. Back to some Ativan mid-June. Added Clonidine June.

2021 July 1: 1mg Ativan (0.2 at 10am, 0.25 at 4pm, 0.55 at 10pm; 0.025mg Clonidine twice a day (9am, 9pm)

Ativan taper: July 12 .19/.22/.54, July 19 .19/.19/.52, July 26 .18/.18/.49, Aug 8 .18/.16/.46, Aug 18 .18/.14/.43, Aug 28 switch to liquid, Aug 30 .18/.12/.41, Sep 7 .18/.12/.4, Sep 12 .18/.11/.4, Sep 14 .18/.11/.38, Sep 23 .17/.1/.36 (dosing at 8am, 3:30pm, 10pm for past few weeks, changed it gradually), Oct 8 .17/.09/.34


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