InChristAlone

[Mia1]

How are you sleeping? Have you had a chance to start one of the books I recommended on anxiety? 

[Mia1]

How are you doing?

[InChristAlone]

Hey Mia. Thanks for asking. I’m doing pretty good. I’ve felt as good as any other time during withdrawal for the past several weeks. Came out of that wave and things have been moving along pretty smoothly. 

[Mia1]

That is truly fantastic to hear, thanks for the update!!

[InChristAlone]

We’ll, I have had a nice window, but I am feeling the effects of a wave that began a couple days ago. I think the wave may be circumstantial to some extent. I was doing some work about a week ago and strained my lower back. My back has been bothering me quite a bit, and if you look back through my introduction you’ll see that this all began when I herniated a disc in my back. I don’t think my back is hurt bad, but it still takes time to heal. I think it has all just set me back a little. It has caused me some health anxiety, which is so frustrating. Sometimes the smallest thing can cause me to worry that something g major is wrong. I’m not sure if that is the way I am or if I just feel this way more because I’m in withdrawal. 
 

With that said, I haven’t made any cuts since February and had a nice window that I really enjoyed. I will hang in there and this wave will pass just like the others. 

[Mia1]

I know for me being in w/d exaggerates everything. I’m happy you had such a good window and you’re right, this wave will pass. I’m going to share this body scan meditation I do daily, it’s really healing and may be helpful.

 

[InChristAlone]

Thanks Mia! 
 

Had a tough night last night. Didn’t get much sleep. Kept waking up really anxious each time I dozed off. Today hasn’t been a great day. Just another wave that I have to wait to pass. It gets old, but I know it’s part of the recovery process.

[InChristAlone]

I’m definitely having one of my worst waves in a while. It felt like my body would go into panic mode every time I would drift off last night. I have rarely had sleeping problems, but the last two nights have been rough. Also, I’m waking with a lot more anxiety than normal. This seems to cause me to feel more depressed through out the day than I’m to used in withdrawal.

 

I’ve been noticing the last week or so my legs have felt kind of weak. I’m not sure if that’s because of the muscle strain in my back or it is a new withdrawal symptom. I do know that I am having quite a bit of health anxiety since my back started hurting. I think it is bringing back so many memories of when this journey began for me. 
 

I know this will pass like all waves, but it is hard to keep perspective when the journey has been so long and I feel like I am having a huge setback. My faith will continue to give me hope of a brighter future. I know I’ll be writing about a nice window soon. 

[Mia1]

I’m sorry to hear you’re in a wave but yes, it will pass. Have you tried the body scan meditation? I do it every night before bed and it’s very relaxing, perhaps it will help you?

 

[InChristAlone]

Thanks Mia! I have not tried the meditation. I did some guided meditation early on in withdrawal, but I felt it reinforced in my mind that I was struggling. I’m not sure if that is the right way to look at it or not.

 

I am have my 3rd night of struggling to sleep since June 29. I’m not sure I’ll get any sleep tonight. The other two nights I got a couple hours of sleep. It seems like I’m jolted awake a couple times as I dose off and then it’s a struggle to sleep from there. I’m really hoping I’m in a wave and that this is not a new symptom. I’m on vacation right not, so sleeping in a hotel does not help. I know I have had good windows. Waves are still frustrating. 
 

I have started to have the internal struggle where my mind tells me it’s not withdrawal, but more of an issue that I have. Waves make me doubt everything. I’m assuming that is normal. I’m hopeful that another nice window is just around the corner. Deep down I knew I’d have more struggles ahead. I know this won’t be the last.

[InChristAlone]

I ended up getting between 3 and 4 hours of sleep last night. 

[InChristAlone]

I had my worst day in a long time. I think it is just a rough wave. I’m guessing this is a result of my cuts that were too fast. Im really hoping this is a short wave, and I can get back to withdrawal normal soon. I did get a 2 or 3 hour window this evening.
 

I think this is a good sign?? What does everybody think? 
 

I am doing my best to accept my feelings and let them pass. I know they will pass, but it is still tough to feel crappy. 

[Mia1]

I’m so sorry you’re having a difficult time sleeping, I know how devastating this can feel. To take the pressure off yourself and lower your anxiety you may want to focus on just relaxing. I find by doing this I always fall asleep anyway. I honestly think it’s just a wave, as you stated you’re in a different environment on vacation and I’m sure it’s very activating to your CNS. 

I think it’s so normal that we doubt ourselves during this process of w/d, that we think we’ll always be like this, etc. it’s simply not true. You’re brain and body are healing. The body knows how to heal, sometimes we just have to get out of the way with our thoughts. 

I think it’s a fantastic sign you’re having windows!! You’re only going to get better. Yes, just accept what’s happening as impartially as you can. It’s the resistance that creates the struggle. This is a really good skill to learn for life in general, non reactivity, so look at it like you’ve been given a great opportunity to learn something. It really helps to reframe the suffering. Then there is no suffering!! 

 

 

[InChristAlone]

Thank you Mia! You are so right about changing your perspective. At times, I think I have improved so much on not be reactive and just accepting my feelings. Then, a wave will hit and I feel like I’m not so good at it. 
 

I have slept really good the last two nights. Yesterday I woke up feeling rough, but then felt as good as I have in a long time the rest of the day. 
 

Today, I feel a little anxious and a little down, but it’s much more manageable. Still feeling some effects of the wake I think, but approaching closer to withdrawal normal. 
 

I do appreciate the support Mia, and I hope you are doing well! 

[InChristAlone]

On 2/9/2021 at 8:16 PM, ChessieCat said:

 

SA's recommended taper rate is no more than 10% of current dose with a 4 week hold.  There is a good reason for this.

 

Why taper paper: dose-occupancy curves

 

The reductions you are making are a lot more than "significant".

 

Going from the information in your drug signature:

 

Sept 2020-53mg

Nov 2020-37.5mg      29.2453% decrease

Dec 2020-20mg         46.6667% decrease

Jan 2021-12mg          40% decrease.

Feb 2021-7mg            41.6667% decrease

 

You have not just made one large reduction but have continued to do so over several months.  What we have seen with other members who go too fast is that at some point the wheels end up falling off and it can take a long time for them to stabilise.  From what you have written it seems that yours are getting very wobbly.

 

 

It is not the small dose of 7mg that is causing the issues, it is the large reductions you have made, so it is the lack of drug not the amount you are taking.

 

You have a few options:

• Make a small updose and hold until you reach WDnormal
• Hold on 7mg until you reach WDnormal
• Continue making reductions of any size before you have stabilised and possibly end up suffering more than you are now

 

Holding until you reach WDnormal will probably take at least 3 months or even much longer.

 

Stability

 

WDnormal

Well, I have came to a place where I feel the worst I’ve felt since Lexapro pooped out in me and this all started. I can manage it much better than then, but it is still a very anxious and depressed feeling. I have slept pretty good the last 3 nights, which I’m thankful for that. 

 

I have not made a cut since February, and really felt like I was in withdrawal normal until a couple weeks ago. Do you think what I am feeling is the too rapid tapering catching up with me? 
 

I did strain my back a little and have been on vacation, and I think both caused added anxiety which probably helped bring this along. I plan to hold for a while longer.  
 

From what you’ve seen, how long does it take to stabilize in these situations? I know this may be an impossible question to answer because everyone is different. 

[InChristAlone]

Also, I haven’t mentioned this yet, but I did receive a promotion that was very important and big to me about 3-weeks ago. There was a lot of stress leading up to that including interviewing for similar positions at other places. Just wanted to note that since I’m sure that weighed on nervous system as well. 

[Mia1]

I’m not an expert but I’m going to give you my take anyway. As you stated your taper was too fast and your nervous system needed time to heal. You were smart to hold and as a result your nervous system is healing nicely.

Now you have some small and big changes happening in your life that would normally be stressful but manageable. But because your nervous system is not fully healed you are feeling the stress to the extreme and it has thrown you into a wave. As uncomfortable as this is, you are familiar with it. You know the only thing that will help you is time, patience and good self care. 

This stress WILL start to slow down and so will your nervous system. I suspect that is when you will get back to feeling better. In the meantime just rest and be kind to yourself.

Congratulations on the promotion, that’s amazing!!🎉

[InChristAlone]

Thank you, Mia! Your input is greatly valued. It helps so much to have guidance from those battling withdrawal. It’s impossible to understand until it has been experienced. 
 

You are right that time is the key to healing. Sometimes I start to think I need to do things to fix myself when in reality just accepting it as withdrawal and not struggling with it would be much more helpful. 
 

I truly believe that healing is inevitable. Time will allow the body to heal. I intend to be much more patient in my cuts from now on. 
 

I hope one day to offer support to others as so many have to me. 

[Mia1]

I wanted to stop by and see how you are feeling?

[InChristAlone]

Hey Mia. I’m feeling ok. Had some decent days and some days I didn’t feel great. It would help if my back would get better, but I’m having ups and downs with it too. I think I am handling things much better than I would have in the past. I hope you are doing well! 

[InChristAlone]

On 7/18/2021 at 9:41 AM, Mia1 said:

I wanted to stop by and see how you are feeling?

Hey Mia. I’m feeling ok. Had some decent days and some days I didn’t feel great. It would help if my back would get better, but I’m having ups and downs with it too. I think I am handling things much better than I would have in the past. I hope you are doing well! 

[Mia1]

That’s really great you find yourself handling things better, as hard as this process can seem at times it really can make us stronger and more capable then when we started.

Are you being treated for your back pain? 

I was in a pretty intense wave but I’m coming out now, thanks for asking!!

[InChristAlone]

I’m glad to hear that you are coming out of the wave. I hope you have some really good days ahead! 
 

I had to go to the doctor about my back today. Muscle spasms were so bad that I couldn’t straighten may back. Looks like I just have a bad muscle strain. It’s possible it’s a bulging disc. They gave me a tramadol injection. I feel some better, but it does feel like I’m headed right back into a wave before getting out of it.

 

The dr also prescribed me a prednisone pack and robaxin (a muscle relaxer.) I’m torn on whether to take them, especially the prednisone pack. My back could probably really use it, but I not it’s risky while in withdrawal. Any suggestions?? 

[Mia1]

I’m so sorry to hear about this, it sounds very painful. And yes, physical issues can throw us into waves. 

Have you tried holistic healing such as acupuncture or a chiropractor?

It’s so tricky with medication, right? Will it help us or make us worse, it’s a gamble. I personally wouldn’t take it especially if you can rest and try alternative healing.

Let me know how you make out. Sending you healing vibes 😊

[InChristAlone]

Yea, I did go to a chiropractor. I was t confident he was helping me and it was getting expensive. I do start physical therapy for my back next week. I think that will help some. I think I’m going to hold off on the prednisone and only use it as a last resort. I may take half a muscle relaxer and night and see if I can get the spasms to calm down. Seems like my best bet. 

 

Anxiety wise I am handling this set back with my back  better than I would have a few years ago, so I am healing. I keep telling myself that this is a great opportunity for personal growth. Adversity can be a good thing when we keep the right perspective. 

[InChristAlone]

My back seems to be improving. I did not take the prednisone pack. I have taken a muscle relaxer at night the last few nights, and have been taking ibuprofen.

 

just wanted to note that I started to notice in late May or June that my legs seem really weak. I have been walking quite a bit, but they don’t seem to be getting in shape. I’m beginning to think it is a new physical symptom to my withdrawal. I don’t think it’s related to my back because it’s both legs. 
 

 

[Mia1]

Wanted to see how you’re doing, has the physical therapy helped your back? That’s interesting about your legs, have you found out any more about it?

[InChristAlone]

My back seems to be getting better. Legs still seem weak. Maybe I’m just not in my best shape. I don’t know.

 

My wife and son have tested positive for Covid, so we are dealing with that right now. 

[Mia1]

I’m so sorry to hear that, I hope they feel better soon.

[InChristAlone]

Hello SA. I could probably use a little encouragement. I had a sleeplessness night last night. I feel awful today. I feel like I’m struggling as much as I did in the beginning. I’m hoping it’s a wave that doesn’t last too long.
 

My mind is telling me I should just try and find an antidepressant that works similar to Lexapro again. I don’t want to do that, but I feel like I’m fighting a battle that I cannot win. I’m sure my cuts were too fast. I wish I would have been patient and listened to the moderators. I had so many days that were mostly good, and I guess so got overconfident. I probably could have avoided some of the misery. 
 

I am in a battle to tell myself that it is withdrawal and not a problem that needs meds.
 

Thank you for any encouragement, advice, or ideas of how to get back on track. 

[Mia1]

I’m sorry you’re having a difficult time. Did you recently reduce your medication? I see on your signature it says you were on 7 mg in February and then nothing until August where it says you are on 15 beads. 

 

If I’m reading your signature correctly it looks like you are tapering too quickly and that your nervous system is trying to catch up. I know what it’s like to just want to be done with these drugs and quite honestly the whole tapering process as well but I think you need to slow down. If it’s too intense for you you may want to tag a moderator and see what they have to say about possibly reinstating a small dose, I think this would be much better than reinstating another drug. 

 

Has anything happened recently to increase your stress levels? Along with the fast taper that could definitely put your nervous system in overdrive. 

 

You’ve had waves before so remember that they don’t last. You will sleep again and feel better, you just need some time. I would try the body scan meditation before you go to bed, it can really help with sleep. You’re going to be okay.

[InChristAlone]

@ChessieCat

 

Hey ChessieCat. I am learning my lesson on the too fast taper. I know I’m in for a long hold. I’m planning at least 6 months. 
 

Over the past 2.5 months I have had 3-4 nights total that I didn’t sleep hardly at all. Those days are followed by a day or two at least where I feel completely terrible. Big time anxiety and depression. Do you think these are rough waves as a result of too fast cuts? 
 

My mind is telling me that I am going to always be like this without medicine. I know I’ve made progress and I do not want to start another AD unless it is the only way to avoid these really bad days. 
 

Do you think I should updose? I cut to about 6.3 mg about 2.5 weeks ago. I held for 6 months, so I hoped I was ready, but evidently not. I’m planning to hold another 6 months if that seems like a good idea.

 

I apologize for not listening to advice earlier on, but I have learned my lesson.

 

Thank you for any support and suggestions.  

[ChessieCat]

36 minutes ago, InChristAlone said:

 I cut to about 6.3 mg about 2.5 weeks ago.

 

From your signature:

 

Effexor: August 2018-150mg. Sept. 2019-139 mg. Oct. 2019-122mg Dec 2019-112mg Feb. 2020-101mg Apr 2020-93mg

May 2020-75mg Aug 2020-66mg Sept 2020-53mg Nov 2020-37.5mg Dec 2020-20mg Jan 2021-12mg Feb 2021-7mg Aug 2021-15 beads

 

Please update this and state mg and number of beads this way, eg 7mg/18 beads (I do not know if this is correct it is just an example).

 

We need to know how many beads you are now taking, as well as the mg dose, so that we can see exactly what you have done.

 

Also please add the date to your signature for the past year.  It makes it easier for us to see the number of days you have been on a dose.

 

Once we have clearer information we will be better to assist.

[InChristAlone]

I updated my signature. Before the last two cuts I was using a scale to weigh the beads instead of counting them. I started counting because I didn’t trust the accuracy of my scale. I do still measure the beads when I count them to make sure the weight seem close. 
 

I am taking 15 beads which is approximately 6.3 mg right now. I have been since August 23rd. 

[ChessieCat]

Thank you for providing the details.  It is very helpful.

 

So my understanding is that you went from 17 beads to 15 beads, approximately 7mg to 6.3mg, which is a 10% reduction. 

 

Do your symptoms follow a regular daily pattern related to when you take your dose?  Before considering an updose you might find it helpful to be observant for the next few days and see if your symptoms worsen and they improve at the same time each day.  If this is happening then it is possible that you might be experiencing interdose withdrawal.  I posted about this to another member earlier today who is also taking venlafaxine.  Please see for information about this and how to split the dose:  caspur-history

 

If you do the above and think that your withdrawal symptoms are caused by the reduction then you could try updosing by 1 bead.  Your brain will have made some adaptations to the lower dose since you made your last reduction which is why you do not go back to the last dose.  If your symptoms are bearable I think it would be better to hold for longer.  When making the decision about updosing I would ask myself if this symptom/s continue can I handle it/them.  If I said no then I would updose by a small amount.

 

There are members taking the beads from the Effexor capsules who sort/ed them into small, medium and large so that they can tailor their taper better as they get to the lower doses.  Please see:  ☼-hello-mammap

 

I suggest you check out mammap's topic to see how she managed her taper.

 

 

 

 

 

[InChristAlone]

Thank you ChessieCat. My biggest problem that just recently started is insomnia. I didn’t sleep at all Monday night and last night I slept 2-3 hours. 
 

This has made me feel really bad all days after a night where I don’t sleep. 
 

I have had a few nights like this over the past couple months. The last 2 nights has been the worst back to back. 
 

Does it seem to you like I am in the midst of a wave?